All DJ Entries

Dream 1:

I was in some FPS video game that had used some elements from STALKER, like radiation and anomalies, but was happening in some desert. There was an enemy base i had to attack and some AI controlled character was following me and i had to defend him as well. I was trying to find best way around the base, including stealthing, ending up failing due to obstacles or something else and replaying the mission a few times, one time there was some anomaly that fired flares or something. Then decided to just go with direct assault. I've had some gun that fired high explosive bullets, though for some reason it was not effective versus enemy soldiers, they were taking damage from direct hits only, so i switched to some other weapons. Enemies came out of the base and i was shooting them while taking cover behind one of wrecked cars, then i ended up successfully clearing the base as well.

Dream 2(fragments):

I was in some video game and i was in some complex and there was something about dragons.

Dream 3(fragments):

I was playing some FPS, coop with SilentEternity. It looked somewhat similar to minecraft, except not that blocky, there were slopes and such. We were doing some mission where we assaulted some kind of complex underground, activated it's self-destruction sequence and had to escape, sliding on very long slope down and then finding portal of some kind at the very bottom.

Dream 4:

I was in some strategic game, controlling some base, ordering some researches and unit building. Then i opened global map, which don't looked like earth at all, there were much more separate continents for one. We controlled only small partion of the map and there were various other factions of different color that we had to fight, and that were fighting between themselves as well. Red faction controlled one of the continents fully and had two of strategic points here. Our faction was dark on the map and controlled one continent fully as well, but with only one strategic point. it was not the aim though since we were going for some other victory condition.
Other than two fully controlled continents, most of other continents were controlled by various other factions partially, and we controlled parts of some as well. I then sent some air transports with forces to attack resource points of white faction, but though units didn't hold it for too long due to white faction having heavy bombers, it was enough. I've got enough resources for some endgame tech that apparently added some kind of spaceship unit and unlocked another research of some green beam weapon. I've needed more resources.

Dream 5(fragments):

I was playing Front Mission 3, but it was different. There was some mission in some underground complex, there i've had to fight four enemy wanzers with four of my wanzers, they were all roughly in weapon range from starting point and additionally the spawn positions could be selected more widely. One of my wanzers had some claw-like weapons and massive shoulder mounted cannons and looked really cool with dark blue color scheme, but it had lowest hp. Then also i've had wanzer with some shotgun-like weapon that activated some skill right as i placed him before first turn even, and auto-attacked nearest enemy. Then during the turn, the low hp wanzer took alot of damage, but then i've attacked enemies with my wanzers and dealt with them quite quickly. Another one of my wanzers had some kind of plasma/energy shotgun weapon that dealt very high damage. Soon enemies were destroyed but mission didn't ended. My wanzers automatically progressed through complex into another area, where there were four more enemies, one of which had flamethrower.

Dream 6(fragments):

I was browsing some forum about forum games and there was some discussion about dragons.

Having a bit of a dry spell right now so I thought I would share one of my LD's from my journal. Hopefully spark some activity.

Setting: Bedroom.
Method: WILD
Induction: Guided relaxation CD
Lucid dream number One: after a nine year gap.

Popped into LD straight from my relaxation, an amazing feeling of knowing you are asleep and yet totally conscious. Extreme clarity and detail, I could liken it to a comparison between a VHS cassette (RL)and a blue ray disc (LD)

I'm sitting up and forward a little, looking back at my girlfriend on my left, she is heavily pregnant right now and in my dream her stomach was flat. A huge reality check for me. I floated over to the door to explore the house and reached to turn the bedroom door handle to let myself out, my hand passed through the handle ( felt surprise and amusement) so I leaned into the door with my shoulder and floated through to the hallway. Dream ends and I awake. I am really excited and want to try again right away...

I manage to slip straight back into another LD ( not sure how or I would share) the only way I can explain is it was though I put my focus point at a certain feeling? From the last LD. (If someone knows what I mean and can explain this feeling to me I would appreciate the input)

...sat up in bed again, floating with arms and legs crossed hands in my lap, I hear a mocking laugh in my head, it was echoey, far away? and it unnerved me quite a lot, I decided It was my subconscious and if it was, I could make other sounds, so I tried to imagine music. What an truly amazing experience! I could hear the most beautiful symphonic music playing in my head as I was thinking of it, it started as classical, I heard beautiful choral voices and then electric guitars like some awesome rock anthem solo. Can't describe how good it sounded, really like the best music I ever heard, so weird.

floating over to the window now and passing through the glass entering into a browny grey nothingness with the consistency of thick soup or porridge, definitely texture, movement, particles, liquidy yet not wet. My instinct is to swim, and I do in no particular direction, my brain thinks water and there is a slight panic as I am concerned I can't breath, instantly I realise I can breath and panic passes.

Slight fear and concern now at the void and space so decide to do a Loving Kindness meditation in the porridge ( something I had been practicing during the week in RL, I had experienced some strange physical sensations and wanted to try it whilst in the LD. ) I leaned back opened my chest and said 'take my love' don't know why, just popped out, It sounds a little urgggh but there we go, as it happened..

Pop I'm falling, blue sky, and passing through white clouds, sunny day, falling and flying, controlled fall?Feel the Wind, is noisy in my ears and eyes watering a little, I can see super vivid trees and grass, countryside fields, small roads and barns as I fall closer. I wonder how high I am, I drop past a passenger jet, I remember seeing the wing and engines, rivets and paint texture as I fell past.

Getting close to hitting the grass but have no concern about an impact. levelling out now and floating over the country side, looking at tops of trees and the odd roof, nothing much but grass and hedges small roads, farms. I try to look behind and my body levels to sitting, still travelling, floating backward, am able to rotate in all directions, looking at the countryside, sensation changes from flying to floating and being pulled, I look around some more and then I wake up.

Was quite an amazing experience and started researching LD's in the morning, found DV's that day.

Brief Lucid Dream:

I was doing a WBTB so lucidity was on my mind. I was waiting in what I think was a room or hallway. I had this thought that I might be dreaming because I thought I could do that thing I always do in LDs where I fall backwards and right before I hit the floor I bounce right back up (I need to come up with a name for that so I don't have to describe it every time.) But then I doubted it thinking that I had already tried but couldn't. Finally I gave it a try and found that indeed I was dreaming. Then I think I tried to do something with my lucid powers, but all I remember is feeling somewhat disappointed.

And then it was all over.

How lame.

I am inside a fancy restaurant. It is a medium sized room, with several round tables and white tablecloths draped over them. Two of the walls are made entirely of glass. Everyone is eating at their tables when suddenly, two beeps ring out, like the ones on an airplane that signal the "put your seat-belts on" button. My choir director, Nina, talks through the speakers. "Sorry, folks, we will be experiencing some bumps in the road! I think they call it... turbulence?"

I sit down on the nearest chair, and look out of the glass wall. What I see is exhilarating. We are high in the air. It is very cloudy and it is snowing. A lot. We hit a few turbulence bumps and take a small dive, revealing that we are quite a bit closer to the ground than I originally thought. Now, we are about too inches off the ground, on a highway, dodging cars, while going at 100 mph. Whoo!!!

After about five minutes of car-dodging action, the highway comes to an abrupt end; we are on a cliff! Everyone gasps as we shoot over the sheer edge. The clouds part, and the sun shines, revealing that we are now 1000 feet above ground! The scene below us is breath-taking. It is a large town (not a city) with gorgeous green lawns, red and blue roofs, blue skies, and even a beach with tall palm trees! We fly over the city, like a majestic eagle, for a few seconds. Then we turn to the right and start to gently glide downwards. Nina lands us in the parking lot of a McDonalds.

I get out, along with Nina and her mother. We get into a random red convertible and Nina starts driving. Her mom and I are talking, when Nina parks the car.

We get out to see a dark, brown, grim brick building. "It must be the only dark building in the whole town," I think. We head inside, and I sit on an old white couch as Nina and her mom go downstairs for a meeting. I sit there, feeling terrible about the place for a long time. When Nina and her mom finally come out of the meeting, I feel sick. We leave the building, and as I take in the beautiful town once more, I feel better. Begore we get in the car, I ask Nina, with my back turned on the building, what she does to get rid of bad feelings. "Well," she says, "I don't let myself trust them. I know they can do me no good."

I turn around. The dark building is gone.

When I woke up from this dream, I marveled at the advice my subconscious had given me. "Wow" was all I could say!

I am in a small room. There is one large door on the left wall, and poking out of that door, on the ground, are roller coaster tracks! And at the end of these tracks? A roller coaster car! Inside the car is Kitty From that '70s Show! I walk into the car and she laughs. "Are you ready to go?"

"Yup!" I say, and we're off. The doors swing open onto a huge room. Like, so big you could fit two football stadiums inside easily. And the room is filled with an epic roller coaster track. There are giant loops, vertical drops, and sharp turns galore! Kitty and I have a blast on the roller coaster. I notice that the entire roller coaster is made of cheap plastic....

This dream repeats itself quite a few times, so it all seems to take about an hour. WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

The dream starts off with my skipping my guitar class and I am eating a meal at a table in the middle of a field on campus. I start to listen to the other Student who are at my table and they are talking about going to the beach or something. I recognized the people at my table but have no association with them other then I knew who they were. I decided to go home and make up some lame excuse for missing class like i had lunch detention or had to finish a test in another class. I knew it wouldn't be a big deal because my guitar teacher is a scrub and cant control his class. On my way home i decide to do the right thing and go back to school and I still had time so I started making my way back. Then my Dad made a wrong turn on the high way and the high way turned into a giant system of slides. So we waited until the slides crossed with the right one we needed to take and we jumped off and switch slides. I then make it to school and I remember talking to the lady at the front desk of the building where my class was and i was talking about throwing away or ordering a box of pizza. Also I Remember watching a little video of something but i don't know where it fits.

My recall wasn't really happening today i guess i got lazy and waited way to long. Dream Fragment : All I remember is that i am body surfing down a pretty narrow river i would say about 15 feet wide and there are these huge waves going down the river. Also I remember noticing someone about 100 yards in front of me down the river that a knew.

[I had this dream after waking up and not remembering anything, not even solid dream fragments. I threw a bit of a mental bitch fit and I guess Subby gave me this dream as compensation. I'm down with that!]

Apparently I was over at Jasper's place (or he was at mine, which may have been the case as the room was shaped like mine). He and I were playing The Sims 3. I focused in the game and became an observer inside of it. My Sim family was having a party outside and their Toddler was sitting in a high chair. One of the parents looked in its direction because they thought that the game had forced an age transition and the Toddler was turning into a Child, but no such case.

By the time I was done with The Sims 3 Jasper had turned into Luna, an old childhood friend. Luna's older sister may have also been there.

I was sitting down on the floor in front of the bed and Luna was playing with a lighter. Instead of spouting out fire, it was crystal shaped in the stereotypical shape of a diamond (a few of them). If she pulled the lighter back while holding the button down then crystals would appear there, and if she held it higher then the crystals would follow her lead. Well eventually she stopped and but in some movie in my XBox 360 and the two of us laid down together in my bed. After a little bit Luna asked me to set the loop when one of the characters screamed "Gooooooooooo!" When I asked her why she explained that we "might as well be happy." This task proved harder than I expected it to be because I missed at the beginning and we had to keep listening to the characters talk, but Luna was okay with that.

Later on I went into the living room and watched some show with my parents. It was pretty good, though I don't remember much about it. There was one particular character named Emmett, but all I remember from him is that he had high-ish cheekbones. If I remember correctly then in the story, if the characters did something wrong or if they survived for a certain amount of time, then they would be turned into crystal. Near the end of the episode Emmett and one of the others (a female character) knew that it was their time to go and so they awaited their fate with open arms. The episode ended and I went outside.

At first it was at night and it looked like it usually does in Greentree. I must have seen Jason and some other people at some point though. Towards here is a blank in my memory and then the landscape looks more like the area of Pine Plains that my family lived in when I was still attending SPPHS. Jason is with (not "dating with") a girl that goes to my school but who I never talk to. As the three of us are walking down the hill that leads to the trailer park in the SPPHS school district, I notice that neither of them have any of their teeth; apparently they had been doing crystal meth.

By now the sun has come up again and I go back inside to watch another episode of that show. It's showing the opening theme and there is a portrait of Emmett and someone else (perhaps the chick that was crystallized with him). The portrait changed and so the show revealed that Emmett was none other than Adolf Hitler.

non lucid
*I realize that I am taking the long way home. I see my brother taking a shorter way home on his skateboard. I decide to follow him. I am also on a skateboard and it is night.

during the course of the night i found myself travelling. i was among a huge crowd of people, and we were walking along an abandoned freeway. everything was peaceful. i formulated some words, to use as a marker: once society is gone, there will be highways full of love. i started to run soon, as i took a turn down a decrepit offramp. there was a horse chasing me, and i had to jump over this gap. i could barely make it, but it would deter the thing that was chasing me. i remember it as a part of another story; this is where he breaks his legs.

so i make the jump, at the cost of hurting myself, and walk off and away. i remember looking at the trees in front of me, as the sun was setting. i realize: this is an amazing place. it dawns on me. why should i turn away from the sun, from beauty, from comfort? except there were no words in the realization. i'm not about to stick with this shitty storyline where i break my legs and then walk into the forest at dark...

i turn around. the sun gets brighter and brighter; the day goes backwards as more of the meadow i'm in is illuminated. it's breathtaking. i see, appreciate, visualize, create. now, for some place to sit down. i see a spot up on a hill and make towards it. i am enjoying nature around me, the beautiful scene that i've become aware of. if only i had something to eat...

without even wanting it that bad, i see a plate of sandwiches on top of the platform! i near the crest of the hill to see more of the plastic platform that was designed for me. wouldn't you know, there is a copy of super smash bros all set up, with Falco waiting on the screen for me, already picked. i turn around to scope out the little valley below me... it has been set up as an amphitheater. there is a projector which can broadcast smash to a theater-sized screen. wow.

but this isn't all that i want. these things are just secondary. the act of creating was more important. the comforts are no good in comparison. with great power comes great responsibility. i can't settle for this anymore.

i walk around some more, and the dream slips back into non-lucid. i talk to someone about playing a "perfected game," playing around the edges. a perfectionistic game. steven is there. he still plays, although it's a different game--he sprays gunfire into the lockers along the wall, opening various doors. pinging sounds, and different point denominations pop up. that's cool, i guess.

the second dream, steven is driving us along the highway. he's in a big van. we nearly get in an accident; there's some way crazy shit going on. different drivers stop and swerve. we go past a cop, another one... strange he didn't pull us over, but maybe it was because the evasive/risky driving helped us avoid an accident. or maybe it was because there were other things on his mind...

we soon come to a DEAD STOP. people start shouting "GET TO THE GROUND!" There is running. I feel true panic, and helicopters show up, and armed men rappel down the side from ropes. THE TERRORISTS ARE HERE. Except it ends up being a government agency, run rogue. This is authority doing this. Everybody flees. I go to the side of the highway, since I didn't get much chance to run. I tumble down, down, and do my best to hide by curling up into a ball. i wait anxiously, noting the quality of my breath and the way the panic makes me focus.

I've been found. A huge man comes up to me and points a massive gun to my head. "Join us," he says. I look up, and in a fraction of a second, before I can respond, he shoots me.

I'm dead. But I walk and float around as a spirit. The men are burly as hell, straight out of the movies, and their guns are nearly as big as they are. I see them rounding people up. "Join us." At a moment's hesitation, they shoot them in the head. This isn't fair.

I have an awakening. Fuck this. I'm going to do justice to them. I come at one of the soldiers, and we fight for awhile before I realize that I can phase through him, as a ghost. I go to the man who killed me and seize possession of his body. He jerks around in pain and panic. I make him jump off a balcony into the courtyard, and it brings me great pleasure to feel his neck breaking. He is dealt with.

The setting is now a mansion. I float around all ghastly, and I try to hover and levitate. I get mixed success, but can't really escape the pull of gravity. As I float upstairs, I see a creepy-looking house fixture, which may be imbued with the spirit of someone else who lived or died here. There is a face I perceive, and it starts to talk to me, rapidly, in whispers, faster than I can comprehend. I'm scared, but not deterred. As I near the thing the voices intensify, but the dream fades. I fade back into sleep paralysis, and feel my hands, which have fallen asleep over my stomach. Back into reality, at least for a bit. (I got a pretty intense wave of fear writing that, just now.)

A third dream, mostly non-lucid. I am at my grandparents' house. The main arc was the ocean. I go out back and it is beautiful, syrupy and black and calm. I go back in the house and see some waves. They are big, and I wonder if they'll come up to the house. But they don't. I go back in and back out again, and there are surfers on the waves. The prominence of the ocean fades in and out as I perceive it. I am losing this place.

Here is my dad, who is more attached to this view than I am. "This is the last time, isn't it?" One of us says this, the other nods and cries. Maybe it's both of us.

The surfers populate the waves, and they come towards me exultantly. But they won't reach! I go into the neighbor's house, trespassing inadvertently, to try and get a better view. But it doesn't work. Eventually I am wearied, from trying to create the signs, and I have a false awakening. My sister is there; I'm trying to watch a blank TV and create visualizations, crazy black and red lines. It feels like a futile pursuit. "The same kind of people who do this are the ones who stock close." ....But I do other things than stock close, too. She grabs the remote and makes the tv ROTATE back and forth, like a tower fan, which bugs me to no end. I hit her, hard, grabbing the remote, and then kick her once, out of hatred. Immediately I feel guilty. Soon I wake up IRL, knowing almost exactly how much longer I've slept in for.

No pain no gain.

Me and these other DC's are in waiting in this elevated hallway, there's large long windows running down each wall and you can see outside through them and it looks like winter is coming. Then some weird creature looking thing runs from out of nowhere towards us and says it begins now. So I want to get the edge on the competition so I just run towards where the thing came from not knowing what to do. There is a door ahead a little off to the left of the wall, and there is two doors on the ground one behind the other, the other DC's come to the conclusion that one must choose the correct door to proceed, but I know that we have to go open each door and collect and recall things, so I open the first door on the floor, and something comes out, it looks like some creature man, I memorize it, and open the next door as some of the DC's go into the previous door and presumably get stuck. I know it's the vertical door we must go into, so I run to it and enter. The me and about 5 other DC's are in this candy land looking place, and my sister is here too. We find clue written on random things telling us to find things like a scavenger hunt, me and my sister decide to work together, we go into this really small house and read a clue that we need to find a blue dragon wrapped in cellophane, I can't find it but my sister pulls it from the floor, it must've been under the table. So we get out of the really small house and keep searching for stuff on the list, the next things we need to find are all the little action figures, it says that we must search the neighbor play houses of the main character, so we run to the other play houses, and we see the other DC's searching for stuff, this kid we don't like keeps trying to race passed us and get the objects we are searching at the moment so I get physical with him and push him into vacuum and computer boxes and we get ahead and get the the houses, but some one else got the action figures, so we look for something else but everything is found, then we are all called to the front of this place by this creature guy and he determines who has found the most items. I realize it seems I hardly found anything and I notice that one of the people found a red dragon wrapped in cellophane instead of a blue one and they don't even know it's not correct. But luckily my sister won it for us. there was no prize really but I think we will be the only ones let out of this place.

The dream started with me trying to get a job. There were two places I liked. One place called "Suzuki diner" (reference below) and another place called "Big burgers & bucks". I don't get it either.

Anyways, I applied for the Suzuki place, and walked up and down the hill I live on. I'm not sure why, but it was a nice day so I guess I was just enjoying it. After doing that a couple times I walked back down to the place, expecting it to be done. I accidentally walked into the wrong place.

In that place there was a guy holding a guitar. He looked to be 30-ish, he had a beard... actually. Come to think of it, he looks like Steve again! Why do I dream of him so much? Anyways, he said "Oh great! Your here! Come, we're going to do a hand-eye coordination test." He led me to a paper with two thumb-shaped holes in it. I excused myself, because this was not the place I was going to.

Weirdly enough, I walked up my hill again instead of going to the place I meant to go.

And now, it starts getting weird.

I walk up and there's this 40-ish year old lady doing a stripper dance on a telephone pole. I started walking a little faster. She started to strip down her clothes and then I started to run. My house was only a couple blocks away, and I do NOT want to get involved with that.

Now since this was my dream, and I didn't want her to go near me, she started to drift off. Luckily I was far enough away when she finished stripping down. I got home, and I was about to tell my brother about what happened when,

I woke up.

Reference:
"Suzuki" Is a name for a violin book. I was interested in violin a year ago, and I recently went to a garage sale to look at one. So I guess I was thinking of that?

Or, its always an option that its just completely random.

For some odd reason I have had these dreams before, all different but seemingly the same.

The dream starts out where I'm playing with my cousins and talking to them - like I did when I was a kid at my grandma's house or wherever we got together as a family.

Then I start talking to an unfamiliar but friendly voice/character about my family and showing them fake pictures of my family. In the dream of course, they were pictures that I knew of, but now that I am awake I know that they were not real pictures and still in the dream I was questioning about the people in the pictures. The people kind of looked like my real family members but the places and poses in the pictures were very unfamiliar.

There was this one picture where two of my cousins were sleeping together on a couch with pacifiers in their mouths. I remember that the pictures seemed to be moving, like in the Harry Potter books. I was saying things like "isn't she too old to be using that thing in her mouth?" "when was this?" "Where am I?" I looked through dozens of pictures and noticed I was in none of them. In reality, all the photos I have, I am in most of them.

I then put the pictures down and noticed that I had several people around me, all family members. One of my little cousins, who was a baby in the dream but in reality is almost nearly an adult started to hum the Final Fantasy Victory Fanfare several of the games. It reminded me of the VII fanfare and others too.

I felt really cool about this because she had just learned how to walk and couldn't talk much and hummed something from my favorite game series. I then went to tell one of my aunts who also enjoys Final Fantasy. I whispered in her ear so no one else could hear and then she said to me something like "wow, that is really cool Alia" (alia is my name).
And then smiled and then seemed to turn her attention to a scene that was happening in the room from a early child hood video I have when I was a baby.


The moving pictures thing is kind of funny because I have been listening to the Harry potter books audio and thinking about the moving pictures mentioned in the books.

7/30/13 Tuesday

Last night bed around 1am. I figured I can try falling asleep with my Yoga Nidra CD. It's not made to make you fall asleep, but for some reason, it puts me to sleep in 10-15 min, or even less. Don't know if the narrator has hypnotic voice, or really, just mental survey of body is so relaxing. As he speaks, there are pauses, maybe 4 to 8 sec long (different places different length). And without realizing it, i fall asleep, still awake, and I'm startled awake with his voice, only to fall asleep and wake up again. I like the feeling.

DR: I'm in my home town, on the street, where the long time ago burned down movie theater used to stand. A parade is suppose to start in a little while. We see the cars that look like rollercoaster seats assembling.

Someone I know is suppose to be on one of them, so someone droppes off my balck backpack on the sidewalk with my camera. I'm walking there to pick it up. There are some people getting out of a bar that's right there and I'm really worried they will take my backpack. I come to it. It's my old, black backpack, all worned down, filled only half way. I look inside and my camera is there. I go back on the sidewalk, getting ready to take a picture.

After it's over, I walk on the sidewalk towards where we used to live. I'm inside a house with some people I know and I'm so sad, that I have to go back. It's even worse than last time. People ask me about that and I'm just sad.

I keep walking, and a child cries after me from a first floor balcony of a yellow house. I look back, but I know it would be even harder on him if I stoped or said anything to him. I think I was crying. A man and a woman that are standing with the child, I sense they are very kind and fair, but I'm not sure, they are his real parents. They tell me to wait, it's ok for us to say goodby properly. That's when I really start to cry and I appreciate they let us hug.

I just hope I don't have a child in astral that misses me.

Had this dream where my doppelganger was eating the souls of tulpae. It was weird, because every time he killed a tulpa, a credit sequence (like the end of a video game) scrolled over a fractal in my vision.


When I opened my eyes, I was sitting up. I didn't wake up and then sit up. I woke up from the dream IN a sitting position.

No idea what it means.