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Thursday 8/8/13

Last night bed 12am - 7:30am

As I was falling asleep, I thought I'll try to have a DILD that night. So I was looking at back of my eyelids while saying "I'm dreaming".
I thought I got lucid 2 times last night in a DILD. But there was no excitement and I'm leaning towards these being false lucids.

DR 1 - I'm on a street car/trolley, going up slight hill. I sit on the driver's side, by the window. I'm marveling at the architecture of tall buildings with red tile roofs in typical Korean/Japanese style. I'm thinking how cool it would be if it was North Korea, but I know it could also be South Korea. That's when I realize I forgot my camera again (this is becoming a recurring issue for 20 years now).

I hear the tram's bell ringing and we switch to going backwards. I'm not worried, thinking trains do that sometimes. But then I see the guy in front of me looking back with worry and lady on my right is kinda screaming.

I look back and as we are rolling backwards, a truck that's all silver chrome is coming up the hill. It is just a few feet away and I cradle my head to brace for impact. I'm trying to think how else to protect myself and I move my leg a little to different position. At the same time I know we are gonna hit, but we will be ok.

We end up not colliding after all. But we start rolling again, I look back, and there is an elefant coming up tha hill, just a few feet from the back of the trolley. Some light purple liguid is squirting from his feet to the ground, as a street sweeper truck. Again, people scream, I brace, but we don't crash.

DR 2 - I'm sitting at the table with two man. Son and father. They are dressed in black. I'm still in North Korea. They cooked a feast for me and I feel so bad, because I know they have very little and don't want them to give it to me. There is a boiled/grilled chicken quarterd up on a tray, and something that looks unapetizing, like soft brains or something. One of the man lifts from the chair and in broken english tells me that that dish or recipe is from his grandfater. I'm telling him not to give me a lot, but he says "eh, no, here is another scoop" and puts another spoonful of goop on my plate. I start eating the chicken but I know I have to eat the other thing too as not to offend them.

One of the man walks by with an IV bag for his son.

That's when I say "hey, you guys, this is a dream, I'm in a lucid dream. That's when you realize in your dream that you are dreaming". With these words I'm already standing at the window, one leg out the window and a smile on my face. I fly off.

I cross the street and enter a buildng. I'm fying through some corridors and large rooms of what looks like an underground warehouse. I'm still in North Korea and I thing police is after me now. I'm flying between and over some large stacks of pallets, looking for a corner for me to hide in.

But nobody is rushing after me so I decide to get out of there. I'm stopping at crossroads and looking around, then turning to direction where the most light is coming from.

I'm out of the warehouse, flying up some short stairs, ending up in a large marbled hallway with deli shops. I thinking if this is still North Korea and I feel bad for all people there who are not privileged enough to shop and eat there.

I'm sitting someplace when I say "oh, this is still a dream". not sure what I did after. I feel like I was fighting to retain lucidity.

Dream recall from today's naps.

Dream 1(fragments):

I was doing some stuff at home and then i decided to nap and i had dream where i was on sofa floating in space and there were lots of pokemons around playing some game with a ball, most of them were not from actual series though, including two huge red and blue dragon-like ones. Then some dude appears near as well, watching too. Then i wake up and there's some problem with cactuses and something gets stuck in my finger.
Then i wake up again and look at hands, they are kinda weird, so i am dreaming. I get up and rub hands, balcony door is apparently blocked by bed and some garbage so i jump through window. I go through glass just fine but i get stuck in curtains, dream destabilizes. I wake up and have very vivid HH where i look through window and buildings are moving and transforming that lasts a good half of minute.

Dream 2(fragments):

I was switching between playing and discussing some zombie games with someone, which looked like oldschool Resident Evil games. Then there was something about the nest of some queen, which made weird organic pod things, which hypnotized people that looked at them and turned them into zombies on touch. Then i was continuing with zombie games and i was thinking about choice that affected the ending.

Dream 3:

I was playing some shmup and i was on some stage where i was going through some kind of abstract place, with various shapes and abstract enemies as well. The weapon of my ship was somewhat similar to Fossil Maiden from Hellsinker, at least, frontal and sword attack were the same, but different directions activated some different firing modes, backwards activated double homing missiles. At the end of the stage there was some forest and some metal plates were falling from the top of the screen like in Solid State Survivor right before boss.
Then boss battle started and background switched to some tech complex. Boss looked like some mecha-bee thing, probably inspired by Hachi from Dodonpachi, it had various attack patterns that were synced to the music, can"t recall most of them sadly, but i remembered that i fought it before(It was not fake memory i am sure, but maybe actually different dream that i forgot), and i remembered most of his attacks, so i knew good spots where to dodge them and where to safespot, i was doing really well considering attacks were really hard and was not getting hit and was thinking that i should record it, then i remembered that there's replay feature and stopped worrying. Boss started using lots of blue lasers and fight started becoming more 3D, then i was actually in the game. Boss activated pattern where he was sweeping lots of blue lasers across the arena along with lots of projectiles all around, i went for really dangerous semi-safespot behind the boss and barely managed to not get hit. Then boss activated pattern with homing missiles and i realized that i don't know how to deal with this pattern using this playership. But then i switched to my own homing missiles and they started intercepting boss's homing missiles on the way. Boss was on very low hp and i was going to do perfect run through all attacks, so i tried to use missiles as little as possible to not do too much damage. Then as boss reached 0 HP, dream ended.

Very very rough pic of the boss that i made after waking up: http://i.imgur.com/bI8ymqP.png

I was at a party with a ton of people and everything was kinda fuzzy/grainey. A tall thing white lady dressed nicely walks by me dragging someting behind in one hand. I realize she is dragging a body. I look down to see a young helpless looking teen saying "prom was fun this year"

I don't pay much notice other than "must be a drunk girl" Later in the dream however im at a large convention full of thousands. i go outside to get some air and again i see the same woman dragging the girl by the hand on top of the concrete. the two dissapear into an elevator. this time i raise an eye brow.

then one of those weird dream moments when everything makes sense began to unfold. At the convention, apparently cold play was there because i began mouthing the lyrics to "viva la viva" i think it was dream lyrics and i was singng either a completly different song or was just making shit up, but everything in the song went something to the effect of "i took you by the hand and drug you through" By the end i realized how fucked up what the ladie had down to that girl was and i began freaking the fuck out.

suddenly i was at home in my living room with my dad and carlo. we were watching some TV and i tried to explain to them that i had the craziest dream. Unfortunatley they were to busy with the tv. So i went to the phone and tried to call my grandma. The phone wouldnt dial. Or perhaps, i couldnt dial cuz i began to panic and kept pushing the wrongnumbers..

then i hear a taping up my porch steps and become anxious until i see my grandma come through the sliding door. She is then followed by my mom, and 3 other of my mom's friends. They sit down and i say "thank god you guys are hear, i just had like the craziest dream/life realization"

roxy interupts me "ok but can this be like a 30 second story"

dishearteaned i respond "gime at least 4 minutes you guys have to hear this"

None of the women respond. I start explaining "so you know those nightmares where you don't realize until the end how fucked up everything is...well this is kinda"

As i kept explaining all the woman bgan to dissientegrate into these little black grainey dots. I fell back and screamed "mom!! mom where are you"

I felt my hand tugged a stumbled onto the floor. the entire room became like a fun house with the walls squishing then squashing, and the sound distorted and choppey, like a deep voice police phone behind rewound and sped up.

I keep screaming "Mom Mom!! please... anyone!!"

I get to a pount where i cant scream any longer and am pushed onto my couch. the dream starts to fade as i see the white face of the lady flash before my eyes and hear a menacing laugh. I spring out of bed and freak out becasue im lying exactly where the dream ended....on my backroom couch alone in the dark

The dream starts off I'm in summer school(Thank God I'm not IRL!). I'm sitting in the library on one of the computers, though I can't recall what I was doing on it. The nice school librarian(she is really nice IRL) comes over and sits next to me. We begin talking about summer and whatnot, just relaxing and being friendly. It is now time to leave and so I exit the school, and the librarian offers me a ride. So I accept and I walk down the sidewalk past a bunch of fifth graders who insult my weight. Not even offended nor surprised, I turn and shout "GAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY" at them. I realize it was a horrible comeback, and just continue walking. I'm waiting by her car now for her to get here. I look at a speed limit sign which reads "Speed Limit 45." I'm actually quite curious as to why the speed limit is 45 when this is a residential area. Someone could get easily killed like that. The librarian shows up now with three girls. Well this is going to be an awkward ride home. One guy and four girls, two who're really stuck up too. So after a long fiasco of trying to get us arranged, one of the girls ends up walking home, and then we finally drive off. I realize it's Halloween because everyone but me is wearing costumes today. I finally get home and then end up going over to my friend Zaine's house. There we watch a movie on Netflix about sex addict couple trying to become religious. It's supposed to be a comedy, but most of the scenes make it look like more of a porno to me. After the movie, Zaine and I go looking around his garage for something. I'm asked to move something, so I get in a car and back up so there's space. I then realize the neighbors have been sharing this garage and I've stolen their car on accident. I now exit the car and go about my business until suddenly, someone is there. I turn and see Jesus standing before me. He asks me how I'm doing, but I nervously answer with an "okay."
"So you're back, Jesus?" I ask. "I guess that means it's the--"
"Second coming!!!" my friend Rachel exclaims bursting in the door. She seems extremely excited at first, but then very serious. She asks Jesus to just let the world stay a little longer.
"Look I'm just stopping by," Jesus says. "But this is the last time I visit this generation!" Jesus seems quite annoyed with the generation of people obviously. He now exits the garage, and Rachel and I go after him. As we walk outside I realize how biblically incorrect this is and I become lucid. I look up now and see that Jesus is gone. Knowing that it was only an image of Him and not the real one now I simply do not intend to pursue Him, because I'd be talking to an image of my subconscious, not real Jesus. So I start flying now, and Rachel is baffled. So she begins to fly with me, making me baffled. I try to use energy to fly faster, which results in me smashing into someone's house like an idiot. I now look down and see my friend Paul. I decide to have a friendly fight, which Rachel joins in on, and shit actually gets pretty intense. I now try to use the closed eye method to do something, but I have a false awakening. And not too long after I awake for real.

At Mike M's house. Looking at his red ipod, turns out it has my name on it, it's my ipod. Looking through my closet as his house for clothes. There's my blue jacket and bruins jacket. Part of my clothes fall off the hanger. On bed, Sophia there, looking at me. Go outside, at Avon. Riding scooter to auditroium that's in the cafeteria. Campbell gets a ride from me. Get to auditorium, go up the stairs, climb over railing, jump through window, in auditorium. Climb down, sittinng. Go to bathroom to fix hair. Looking in mirror. Pizza/sausage all over my face. Be there a long time, start to think is this a dream. Not sure if did a reality check but know it's a dream. Quickly come out of lucid. Wake up.

Fuck my new format I'm lazy. I'll just make it easy on myself.

Red-NLD
Blue-LD
Black-Awake

I find myself amongst many classmates in someone's living room. The living room turns out to be my English teacher's house from this past year(I've never actually been to it or in it IRL). He is teaching us very angrily about something no one could give a damn about. He finally gives up and just makes us watch a movie. After class is over, everyone rushes to leave the creepy rundown home and get to our own homes. I leave through the garage as the door opens and the teacher's wife pulls into the garage after me. I go outside to see a very urban city setting(I live in a suburb IRL). I see many of people out and about as I begin to make my way home. But then, I do ADA and I become lucid! I turn around and a woman with half a face walks past me. Kinda creeped out now, I continue walking and contemplating what I should do. I now decide to do the hug a DC TOTM. I realize when I wake up it will be August, so there's no point really, but I still would like to try it. So I now walk over to the nearest DC and give her a big hug. She now begins to squirm and struggle to break free. I try hold the hug, when suddenly we are now both naked.

Anyone can guess what might've happened next, but I was doomed to soon awake.

In the uni, working. There is a bomb last. The police check around. There are a couple of guys that I find suspecious. The first one seemes to be the boss, second one seems to be a henchman. They plan to do another one. It's my job to help them, because they have my family hostage. The second guy comes in, I told him to run because police were coming for him, we run through the hallways, what seemed like the H wing and go upstairs. They find out about us, and told me to stop. I told them they had my family and I had to do whatever they said. Can't remember the rest.
This has been going quite poorly. I'm not putting much effort in.

Hey guys, it's the end of my first 30-day challenge. I know I've skipped writing DJ's for the last couple of days but life just came in my way.
Nevertheless, I'm more than satisfied with the results of the last month.

When I started this challenge, I was on a 3 month dryspell. During this challenge I finally figured out what works for me and for the first time I had the feeling that lucidity is in my control.

I won't write down my last night's dreams as they were really short. In the dream I talked about lucidity and even got lucid for 3-4 seconds.
What I did last night was pretty much improvisational. I wanted to wake up after 5 hours of sleep but I overslept my alarm due to tiredness and woke up after 9 hours.
I fell asleep again while doing passive LDD.

Here's my summary of the last month:

I learned a pretty much sure-fire technique to get lucids after WBTB.
ADA and meditation is really important and it's a lot of fun. ADA increases life quality so much and meditation keeps up your focus for ADA.
At least 8 hours of sleep are required for me to be able to get lucids.
Skipping a day or two isn't really that big of a deal, as long as you return to your challenge with new energy afterwards.
Motivation is completely optional, you just need to have a strict work ethic.
Emotions are negative for my attempts, I need to rid myself of any emotions and do my attempts on a pure logical basis.
Writing DJ's is really interesting if you analyze your dreams and try to find out which elements of the dream came from which event IRL. But natural recall is as good as writing DJ's as long as you analyze them in your head.

I'm going to use this information for my next 30-Day Challenge in which I will solely focus on refining my technique.

See you guys!

In this fragment I and my sister in law and some others were preparing food for people. Among other things we soaked croutons in soup and sent them to some people who for health reasons could not eat other stuff, but perhaps could eat soaked croutons.

Before I start, let me say this is the first lucid experience I've had since I got started with all this only a month ago, so it's nothing too big, but it's a step forward for me.

I was in a strange place, it looked like a cloud, I could see the cotton-like floor and the blue sky above me. I was holding a piece of paper with both my hands and there was a legible text written on it. I noticed my surroundings were quite weird, so I started thinking that might be a dream. I stared at the piece of paper thinking I'd see the letters moving around, but they didn't. I thought "okay, if I was in a dream these letters wouldn't probably be still, but this place I'm in... I'll try staring at the letters, look away and then look back at them again, as if in a reality check". I did it and, sure enough, the text had changed completely. I then shouted "I'm dreaming!" and as I did I started feeling like a tickling and buzzing coming from inside my chest. This feeling kept growing and I knew I'd wake up if I wasn't able to stabilize the dream. I tried to spin around first but I felt like I couldn't move. I guess it took me a bit too long to react because I started feeling my real body on my bed while the dream hadn't finished completely yet, but anyway, I tried to rub my hands together in the dream to see if I could bring it back. However, it was too late, the dream was fading away.

I'm not entirely sure I woke up because I can't remember it clearly (maybe it was a false awakening). I only remember I tried my hardest to fall asleep again as fast as possible, keeping in mind I had been lucid just a few moments before in order to enter the next dream while still lucid. All of a sudden, I felt like something was taking me away floating and I entered another dream, but I think I wasn't lucid in this one.

I don't remember much of the second dream because I woke up startled in the morning and it went away while I was trying to bring back as many pieces of the lucid experience as I could.

Anyway, brief as it has been, it's been an interesting experience. I'm looking forward to something like this happening again soon and being able to stay in the dream.

I fly near a gas station. I land there and think that I don't want to spend entire dream flying. So what to do? I remember I can accomplish TOTM. Well there are lot of DCs around the station, so it should be easy. I see truck driver and ask him: What is the meaning of life? I don't know is his answer. I try to ask 4 other DCs during the dream, but everybody say the same answer: I don't know. One of them say after I don't know: Maybe you should... but i forget the rest. Then I practice move through a wall and doors. On the first attempt the doors stuck in my body, it was an unpleasant feeling.

I tried listening to this:



It's a binaural version of the video from before. I started to feel weightless and stayed that way for a while. After roughly 18 minutes, I eventually opened my eyes for whatever reason. I was only on the delta stage, so I couldn't dream right away. I'll try again in a few hours when I'm more tired.

1. [non-lucid]
This guy and his workers built a huge flying disk, He turned it on and it started rising and it ended up really high in the sky.
I am now on the disk and I break it somehow for whatever reason, now we are plummeting to the ground at great speed, we hit the ground (turns out this is a minecraft world) and slide about everywhere destroying the landscape and buildings as if it was being pushed along.

Non-Lucid Lucid

I was at a sort of bench with a couple of my friends just drinking slushies. It looked like it was out near the fields and there was the sea right next to us. Once more of my friends arrived for some reason I ended up in an airplane hanger with my friend 'R'. We both had blue slushies, he came up with the idea of stealing one of these really small planes, two seaters. We boarded one with him flying and me being a passenger. We were stopped by some hangar guards but he managed to take off just over their heads. We seemed to be flying to some type of carnival before two Jets told us to land the aircraft. At this point the dream sort of fast foward itself to the ground and us being handcuffed. I'm not sure were we were but the officer told us that we're not under arrest but he left the handcuffs on us anyway and left. We went upstairs to a sort of cafe where this family worked, one teenage kid, mother and father. They made us a bacon sandwich and that's where the dream ended.

I'm not actively practicing lucid dreaming techniques but I'm still hoping to accomplish my goal of reliving an old dream.

I was standing in an open field, which I think was an air field but not sure. It was a bright day and there was some kind of building nearby with a bunch of people in it. I look up and see this passenger plane fly up and down above me, losing control. Then, BAM! It crashed right in front of me as I held my head for cover. Then, a few seconds later, another BAM! The airplane exploded into flames and sent debris everywhere. I was lucky to have survived without a scratch. I ran in the building to call 911 but a bunch of other people had already called. I called anyway because I figured they would want to talk to me since I was a witness. I told them exactly what happened and that I was right there when it crashed.