Recent DJ Posts

Non-lucid
12:30-2:30PM nap
I'm with Mackenzie, in what I feel is her house, but isn't her house in the awake world. WE're going to have a movie watching party together, but we need to get everything set up first. She gestures me to come with her into the basement. I happily do so. "Grab that plastic bag, please, Alex" she points to it before picking something else up. I nod and pick up the large plastic bag, which seems to be filled with dodgeballs, but I don't look inside it. We walk back to the stairs to go back up when something fuzzy and tickly rubs me in my armpit, where I'm holding the plastic bag to me on my hip. I shudder and say "Mackenzie! Something touched me!" with my voice full of worry and fear.
"Don't worry! It's fine, you're fine, Alex." she smiles. I blow off the event as me having imagined something. We walk upstairs, but once we get through the door, my curiosity overcomes me and I look in the bag. There are indeed dodgeballs in there, what a huge hairy spider which seems to be covered in baby spiders! I shriek and drop the bag, spiders and dodgeballs running and rolling on the floor in every which way.
"Oh Alex..." Mackenzie sounds disappointed in me. "I'm sorry!" I tell her.
We both walk to the living room, where her father is sitting on the couch, waiting. I sprawl on the couch too, as Mackenzie puts in a movie, and then she joins us.
The scene changes.
I'm at a small restaurant with my mother. Aubrey Plaza, and Jeff H and his kids are sitting with us. It has a swimming pool out back. I'm texting Aubrey before our food gets here. Jeff's kids are behaving themselves, talking to each other, playing little games like patty cake and tic-tac-toe on the paper menus. It begins to rain very hard outside. The restaurant begins to flood! First it's ankle deep... then knee deep... then neck deep. Then, it floods almost to the very ceiling, where I'm now floating! There's still enough room for me to breathe, but nobody else seems to have noticed it. All of the tables and chairs are stuck firmly to the floor, and everybody is sitting and eating and talking. The waitress is walking around like nothing is happening. I swim down to everyone, holding my breath, and gesture to outside. Then the water level starts to slowly decrease. In no time I'm on the floor. Then, I'm outside, on a raft in the pool. It starts to flood again, but it isn't raining anymore. The pool's water increases and gets choppy. Soon the water gets very wild, and I hold onto the raft as hard as I can, but I'm quickly headed for the edge of the pool. I look behind me and a massive wave towers above me, putting me in its shadow. "No!" I yell, not wanting to be thrown into the water. "NO!" I yell again as the wave crashes, and the raft is pushed forcefully into the edge of the pool wall, but I go flying without it.
I flop in the water, then tumble on the ground as the water disappears, until I land in the parking lot, completely dry and bruised and tired. A family; a mother, a teenage boy and a teenage girl are getting into their minivan. I hop in too, believing I'm invisible and magical. We drive for a while, nobody paying my any attention because I'm invisible, until we get to the theater. It's gotten dark outside now. I go "Woo!" and clap my hands together once to teleport myself. Nothing happens. Except, now the teenagers are looking at me. Oh. I'm not invisible. I was never invisible. "Mom, stop the car!" the teenage boy says. I'm now starting to panic and the moment she stops the car, I run out, and all of the rest join me to see what I'll do.
Another car stops nearby and a lady gets out and walks down, saying, "Now what's going on here?!"
I jump around, trying to fly away, but I can't. I give up quickly. The family gets in their car and drives away, as if they didn't want to be seen with me. The other lady, luckily, didn't see me doing that. I follow her to her car quietly, and get into her passenger side. She looks over at me and shrugs. "Will you take me back to that restaurant?" I ask "It's not very far." She nods, starts the car, and begins driving that way.
Then, I wake up.

Throughout the duration of my dream I was becoming Slenderman's proxy, or one of them at least. I only know this because that's what I was told in my dream.

At the beginning I was doing simple tasks, one being deliverng messages to who I beleived were his victims. Another proxy was there to help me, he wore a dark hoodie with the hood up of course, a black mask, jeans, and I think black sneakers. He was sorta supposed to help me, but he mostly just lead me to locations.

The message I delivered, I had oddly written on red tape...not sure why.

I think after that, me and the proxy appeared in a large dark room. We sat down in chairs side by side from each other. It felt like we were in a classroom, but I couldn't see any wall decorations or anything anywhere but students' desks. It was either a long abandoned room or I simply couldn't see.

After all everything was pretty much pitch black except for a circle of light around us that was arm's length in radius. The light was extremely dim, so distinguishing colors was hard, so through my point of view everthing was like an old timey black and white film.

After surveying my surroundings Slenderman appeared on the edge of the circle of light, this made the light flicker a bit but remain on. Now you may think I would be freaked out and high tail it out of there, but I didn't...I felt no fear. So I sat there and kept my eyes trained on his featurless face. For a moment nothing happened but then he lifted his arms as if to hug someone.

But that's when the light went out and we were left in complete darkness. Thankfully the light was only out for about three seconds and when it came on Slenderman was standing right beside my desk. He seemed a heck of a lot taller than when he was standing outside the circle. I shrank back but not in fear, at least I don't think so. I don't remember ever feeling afraid in this dream, but I was surprised.

Slenderman usually watches from afar when I have dreams of him. He never has been this close before.

I kept my eyes on his featureless face, from my point of view his skin looked a bit leathery while his pitch black suit seemed made of a very soft fabric it didn't look stiff like most suits did. Enough with the suit, as I stared into his face, I noticed his arms were on either side of me, but only out of the corner of my eyes. I couldn't take my eyes off his 'face'.
That is when I woke up. Right when Slenderman took me.

Upside is, I finally remembered a dream! For the past 3 or 4 days I haven't been able to.
Downside, I woke up with a headache. -_-

I woke up in an old hut. I went out of bed, and looked around. Everything was old. There were rusty pieces of metal scattered over the floor, the window was cracked. There was a table in the middle of the hut, a few chairs and cupboard. There was an AKS-74U rifle lying on the table.

I come closer, took the rifle and loaded it. There were also some grenades, so I strapped them to my belt. Then I went outside. The hut was placed in an abandoned village, in the middle of a wilderness. I felt somehow uneasy in that place, so I went to a small nearby hill. I took a map out of my pocket, and saw that I'm in the Zone around Chernobyl Power Plant, the one from S.T.A.L.K.E.R games.

I decided to move away from the strange village. When I entered the forest, I was attacked by a horde of bloodsuckers. I was running away, trying to shoot them down. Meanwhile some fleshes joined in, and I spot a controller in the distance.

I took a grenade which was strapped to my belt, and thrown it in the group of monsters. Some of them died in the explosion, the rest ran away. Suddenly, the controller that was walking in the distance decided to join the party. I readied my rifle, while he was preparing to launch a psionic attack.

I dreamt I was in a grassy field in New Zealand. I asked a man if I could sleep in some houses, then said I would sleep in the field. Then we were at a science college and I thought I was in the future and living in New Zealand to go to college. I asked the man if he knew of a martial arts school nearby, and I was carrying a black belt. I thought I was in the future so I assumed I already earned my black belt, but told him that in the time period I come from I only earned a green belt. He told me a guy named Mike runs the school. We left the college and a guy came to steal my phone and I gave it to him because I was afraid. Friends came and chased the theif and the guy who told me about Mike kicked him (apparently he did martial arts too) and I started to do a side kick, and doing a sidekick woke me up.

I'm not sure when I went to sleep, maybe 8:00 pm - 10:00 pm. I didn't have much trouble going to sleep this time. I woke up around 7:00 am - 7:30 am.

This was both a lucid dream and a non-lucid one.

I was at a school. All the people I used to know were there, and we all seemed to be on good terms. This is when I started feeling a little weird about it, I thought "I thought they all didn't like me?" But I didn't press it more until later. I was walking with one of them across the grass field in the PE area and then I ran up to other people. We went and sat down by a basketball court.

Then we were walking across the school parking lot and we were going to go somewhere. We were then in a car. It was the driver (who I couldn't see), someone I used to know in the middle, and then me in the passenger seat. They were talking and then I realized, "These people don't like me irl, and I haven't seen them in a long time." So I said "I'm asleep." I think because I was aware of how my DCs always try to convince me I'm awake that they didn't say that. The one in the middle said "Hm, do you think you're asleep?" And then I became certain, and I was VERY lucid. I was thinking and talking like I would irl. I was very very aware of things.

I asked the person next to me if they were my dream guide. Now, I am not sure if they actually were or if they were just a DC, but they either said yes or maybe, I don't remember.

The dream started to fade and I think I was about to wake up, I even felt my body laying in bed. But I kept saying (or thinking, I'm not sure) "I will NOT wake up, I will stay asleep, the dream will continue and I will remain lucid." The dream started to come back, and in a few seconds I was fully lucid again. The "dream guide" next to me was still there, except they were now in the driver's seat, and the other person was gone. I was in the passenger seat still, but I don't think there was a middle seat anymore.

They changed into a bird. I asked them to change into something else. They asked if I would prefer an owl. I said sure, go for it. So they turned into an owl.

The dream started to fade again, and I did what I did before, and the dream came back. I was now in the backseat, and the "dream guide" was still in the front driving. I think we talked some more, I'm not sure. Shortly after that, the dream changed and I wasn't lucid anymore. But the rest of the dream was very long.

I was walking to class and I had my schedule in my hand, I guess it was the first day. I couldn't understand it, and I didn't know where to go. I kept asking people I passed if they could help me. No one else could understand it, or maybe they just didn't know where the class was. I kept going through the school and came across a counselor in the middle of the hallway. It was like a part of the building was cut out, sort of. Like a help desk, almost. I asked the counselor if they could help me. They started saying something about how they were nice to even be talking to me, because they weren't my counselor, and so they weren't allowed to help me, or something. I noticed a large paper with a bunch of sketches of an artist I know irl on the wall behind the counselor. I was very surprised, and thought "They went to this school?!" They sketches were NSFW and some students who came up behind me were looking at them and said things like "Ew."

I left and kept going into random classrooms, hoping that I would come across mine. Students kept looking at me walk in and out, and I was a bit embarrassed. Eventually in one classroom I sat down next to someone I used to know. I asked if they could help me, and I handed them my schedule. They were smart, so I figured they would know. I then leaned over and whispered "A gross NSFW artist I know of went to this high school." They didn't hear me at first so I had to say it again.

I think the dream changed again. I was with my friend outside, at a playground, I think. There was a square of sand, and my friend thought there was something under it. She kept digging with her hands and something poked through. I pulled it, and it was a white plush of a cat or bear. I think I tossed it aside. The friend kept digging, and she found a dog. I think the dog was magic. We went into a big car of mine and the dog kept running out. The view was third-person here. We had to get out of the car and yell for the dog to come back, because it kept running into the street. I think it changed into a person, but changed back into a dog and came back into the car.

The dream changed, I think. I was on some bleachers or something, with a bunch of other people. I think someone there had us captured. The person standing up told my friend and someone else that they were to fight. Not a physical fight, but they had to win games. The person took two round, bouncy candies and threw them into the group of people. They had to catch them in their mouths. I think my friend lost, and they were to be put in a cage. I asked if I could escort and watch her. The person said yes. The friend changed to someone I used to know. We walked through a place with a lot of hallways and open areas and restaurant-type areas. We weren't looking for a cage now, but the friend had to be chained to something with a yellow light above it.

We were looking for it, and found it in a restaurant. It was crowded though, so I wanted to leave. The person was upset, but we left anyway. I don't remember much else, I might have woken up then.

All of the dreams today are mostly me in first person, with full completion, resulting in me waking up upon finishing the dream. Sentences in Italics are thoughts I have in dream, while sentence in brackets are thought outside of the dream.

1. The dream starts of with me wondering down a corridor within the inner campus of a university, where only staff excess is allowed. It resembles the corridors of a hospital, but it's colours are muted. Although I say it resembles a hospital, I know it is not, as I've been to other parts of this university in other dreams before. I don't see anyone around, although I do sense others in the immediate vicinity. I come across a strangely shaped fish tank almost immediately.

It had a odd elongated back wall with gouges of different size and depth. Water flowed gently across its surface, collecting in it's nooks. It looks like a waterfall, I think to myself.

Upon closer inspection, I realise there were shrimps in the tank- two to be precise.

One hung precariously on the edges of one of the gorge, fighting desperately to swim against the 'strong' currents with its small body. The other, with it slightly bigger size, was snuggled cozily in a hole befitting it's breadth. Perhaps it was their contrast, or the smaller shrimp's struggle, I do not know.

I become gripped with a sudden obsession, one that revolved around the tank and its tiny occupants.

I spend a few moments trying to help the smallest shrimp, only to cause it time and time again to be swept away by the water. Eventually I manage to balance it on my finger- I pause for a moment, realising that it was the first I've ever seen my hands in a dream, there being no need for my hands until now. I continue on once I took note of this peculiarity- and find a nook suiting its size.

Stuck in their nooks, they never meet, only seeing the walls of the tank for their entire lives. Such a large tank and small inhabitants. They must be lonely, I ponder.

I continue down the corridor in search of more fishes to place in the tank.

Round the corner, I see another tank with an odd array of creatures. Out of all the creature I only recognise the dory fish from Finding Nemo, although I do not know the name of it's species. All of them were suspended in air within the tank absent of water. Unmoving.

At this point in time, the dream becomes sort of a blur and jumps. I only know that I've made my choice in which to bring with me back to the first tank.

The dream fast forwards to the first tank filled full with water. The shrimps are now able to swim freely, and they have new companions. And that's when things go down hill. The two shrimps, upon meeting, enter a predator and prey relationship. Ending with the larger shrimp swimming off with the smaller shrimp in it's jaws.

While the other fishes that I had chosen, although previously in stasis, upon contact with the water, come to life and feast on one another. I'm slightly alarmed and distressed at the results.

My vision then becomes focused on the dory and one other creature. The dory is one of the first to be eaten, and only an empty outer shell is left behind, the inside entire sucked dry. While the other creature- a strange ugly brown, angular fish with it's face at the top of it's body and wide lips- remains still all this while.

Suddenly, it's face and jaws snap up just as the shell of the dory lands on it's face. It spit it out a second later when it realises it can't eat the empty shell.

Dream Jump

I become worried that the strange creature may starve to death, and take it out from the tank. It becomes a small turtle, smaller than the palm of my hand. I attempt to feed it a copy turtle, and salt. The shell of the original turtle folds and become the jaws of the ugly creature and consumes the copy.
The dream's story finishes and I wake up. (It's around 3-4am)

2. In this dream, my body is a man's and I am a mob boss. I get into a white limousine. My grandmother appears before me. I become confused, as I'm sure my grandmother passed away years ago, but I take it in stride, assuming it to be a conspiracy of some sort in my family. Shortly after, the limousine is fired at. We are showered with bullets, but miraculously I am unharmed, my grandmother however has been shot in her side.

My body becomes back to my original, and my dad and I hold my grandmother up and try to carry her to the nearest hospital. The dream ends with us not making it in time before my grandmother's heart stops beating, and turning into a inflated ballon in the shape of a person upon death. And I think No one has died in my dreams before before I wake up.

3. My brother and I are on a bus to Johor Bahru, Malaysia, from the Dreamworld singapore . It's a tight squeeze. The bus is slightly dim, but filled with a number of coloured mini monsters/ blobs. (They kinda remind me of something outta Spirited Away)

We travel for a time before one of my old acquaintance, Darren, board the bus. We exchange greetings, but something about him is off. His grin is slightly...disconcerting. I proceeded to stare out the window, observing the scenery. The scene outside is breath taking. The setting sun turns the sky a blazing blend of gold and red, going well with the rust red of the autumn trees outside. I try to capture the scene with my phone camera but fail as the bus moves on.

As more time passes, the seats surrounding me start morphing into part and items from my house's laundry room. (Since this was non-lucid I just went with the flow like it was normal lol ) I start hanging up the laundry. Among the laundry there, I find dead mashed up babies and other mashed up bloody meat in between folded clothes. My mother is beside me as I find them, and smiles, revealing two shape row of incisors. Mother did this, I note.

I continue hanging up the laundry, strangely calm about the fact that my in dream mother is a man eating monster.
What feels like hours pass, and I start to panic at the endless laundry and am nearly about to cry when I wake up.

4.I am in an indie game playing as a pink blob called bob. Everything is pixelized and the objective of the game is to look for my burger. I go through a series of tasks and eventually find my hidden burger. The dream then ends

In this dream my younger child was a girl (in reality he is a boy) and got kidnapped and killed. I remember in the dream wondering whether we should have another child not to replace this one but to provide a sibling for my older child again.

The previous night I had a nightmare about some chemical spill from a military base nearby.

I was close to my elementary school. I do not remember this part that well, but I became lucid and I started to fly, but in a weird way.. It could look like I got pulled up in the air with a leash around my waist. I flew to the elementary school, and walked around. It looked very different from what it does in waking life, it was like some of the building I went it to were minecraft on 2 walls and real walls on the others.
The minecraft walls were tall so I thought it would be fun to run up alon them. on the walls there were minecraft wood fences, which were impossible to get over.. So I got down into that room again.
I heard knocks or something, and I look over at an opening to another room. The knocks and the way that opening looked just told me that things was not good there. I walked away and then I heard it from a window. I walked over to the windows and saw 3 dream characters a man, boy and a girl. They played on music instruments while they just looked into the air with a natural face.
I tried to push myself through the wall, but I was not allowed to so I walked away from the windows and I noticed that there now were a mirror where the opening to the creepy room where. I stood in front of it and noticed that I did not have a relfection, and thus came my reflection from the same side I came from, and did the things I did just seconds ago, so it was delayed, which were fun but also weird to experience. My reflection started to get white eyes that started to glow, so I turned my back on it and moved on.
After I turned my back on it, I noticed that there were more mirrors and I got reminded of the TotM, so I thought "Oh yay! Now I can do the TotM" so I ran towards the mirror I was facing and jumped into it. There was no resistance, I went through like nothing was there.
The room I jumped in to were like a flipped version of the room I just came from, it was pink-ish (I can't explain how it looked but it makes me think of a sunset). There was a pile of kids toys on the floor including a mp5. I thought of another thing I had wanted to do for some time, and it was to use a portal gun (Portal video game). So all I expected was that it shooted portals, and it did. I shot it down on the ground and an orange portal appeared. I walked onto it, and nothing happened, so I randomly just shot up on the roof and then I woke up.

This was the lucid dream I had yesterday.

1. I was in my friend Patrick's house with Pat himself, his sister Emily, and Dylan. We had all been sitting down on the couch just relaxing until Alex called and said that his dad would be dropping him off at Pat's house soon. For some reason we all reacted as though this was a rare occurrence and Emily started getting mad, and I have no idea why. She got up off of the couch with a stern and aggressive look on her face. "I'm going to go hide from Alex's dad" I told her, "You should too Emily". "I would never hide from Alex's dad, Alex's dad should be hiding from me". Wow, that's scary.
I leave the living room where we were all sitting and retreated back into Patrick's dad's room, who currently wasn't here. Dylan followed me. My last sighting of Patrick was as he ran down his hallway and into his room. I then closed the bedroom door and found a hiding spot. The realization came to me: this was just an emotionally charged game of hide and seek. I peek through a set of blinds and look in Pat's driveway. Immediately I notice Alex's dad walking up it quite casually. He then comes to the back door and knocks on it. Emily storms to the door and opens it. "Who do you think you are!?" she asks him. He stands astonished and completely clueless. Alex is behind his dad and comes to his defense. "Emily what are you doing? Chill".

2. I had just "woken up". I was lying in bed. My entire room was almost pitch black, but I could still see pretty good despite not having my glasses on. I realize that I need to record my dreams of the night or else I will forget them. I pick up a keyboard that was on my carpet next to me and put it on my bed. This keyboard has glowing white keys on it, and it looks pretty high-tech. I start to type up what I can remember of my dreams, but I have no idea where my words are supposed to appear since the keyboard is not hooked up to anything.
Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye I see a black figure standing next to my closet. I react the same way I always did when I was haunted as a child; I pulled my bed sheets over myself and shivered in fear(extremely unlikely of me now). At the same time as I did this, I continued typing up my dreams on the keyboard, still thinking that it was working. I kind of forgot about the black shadow figure.

3. I was downstairs in my kitchen, looking for a snack to eat. I walked into my pantry and looked around. I saw all kinds of chocolate mini cakes of sorts and other sweets. I then thought to myself, "Why doesn't dad just buy a whole bunch of boxes of a bunch of sweets so we can stock up on them and not have to buy them for a while?". I then walked into the kitchen again and went over to the cabinet to the right of the sink.
I kneel down and open the door. Inside I see tons of boxes of chocolate mini cakes and another type of chocolate mini cakes. On the very left inside of this cabinet I see a big box filled with mini-icecream cup things. I open it up and look inside. "Wow, this ice-cream shouldn't be left out like this. good thing it hasn't been in here for long" I said to myself. I took a handful of these mini ice-creams, close the cabinet door, and then open the fridge. After that I put all of the mini ice-creams that were in my hand, into the fridge except for one; I keep one for myself.
I then close the fridge and look at my ice-cream. The label on the outside of it is orange, and is quite wet. I can tell that the ice-cream has been starting to melt.

Morning of March 25, 2015. Wednesday.



My family and I are living at our present address on W street though it is somewhat different. The area east of us is more like a rural area with less buildings and includes at least one large empty lot. There is a wall clock featured that either is - or is designed to look like - an antique wall clock. The top section is octagonal (same shape as a stop sign - may be an association here with “stopping time” in a “wishful thinking” sort of way) and the bottom section primarily vertically rectangular.

The clock is the main focus of my dream though we also have a garden where the shed is in reality, covering about half of the backyard on the far side. I notice that there are very tall healthy plants, not sure of the variety, that are taller than a person. I briefly contemplate whether or not other people will be annoyed by this in their not being able to casually “spy” on us.

There is also a scene where a very old lady (unknown and unfamiliar) with a seeming cheerful disposition is smoking a cigarette in the (fictional) empty lot east of our house. I notice another cigarette (long, but with no filter) in a shallow narrow ditch (running east and west) in the ground and actually smoke it (even though there is no act of lighting it other than with my in-dream thoughts though I am not lucid). Although I am not a smoker in real life and rarely smoke in my dreams, the usual occurs. Small pieces of tobacco annoyingly fill my mouth from the tip each time I inhale from it. At one point, I exhale, and an amount of smoke far more than would be possible flows from my mouth as I sit on the ground. The old lady seems to be looking for the rest of her cigarettes which she had apparently dropped but continues walking east. There is also at least one unknown older male (about forty) standing around at the time on the north side of the ditch. (There is a very subtle geometrical redundancy as dreams tend to have at times. The cigarette lying longways in the small ditch is similar to the elongated drill-bit-like cog fitting in the semi-circular recess of the clock’s door in the next scene.)

The scene with the clock is fairly long and complex. The only character other than my wife and children at this point is a black-haired young female “servant” (though implied to be divine or angelic, though without the typical mirror-like eyes in this case). She is the one that starts the idea of the work on the clock involving the refurbishing of three different gears. Other than that, the clock seems mostly hollow of working parts but is still implied to work well again when repaired. Her intent to “restore” me (via the clock) seems devotional and selfless (though my wife unknowingly triggered a Blue Pearl event - brighter than usual - when I was in a health-affirming state the other night, just with her mental state at the time from a different room - thus the girl may also represent a young version of my wife - also yet again supplying evidence that the Blue Pearl is related to either direct communication between real soul mates or an entity or mechanism that acts on their behalf).

Paying close attention, I note that one gear, a slightly elongated cog that almost reminds me of a piece of a drill bit, is quite small and goes into the top edge of the clock’s “door” into a long semi-circular recess closest to the hinged side, though still has something to do with the timing mechanism rather than just the door uniformity and latching. Another cog is fairly large, about one-sixth the size of the clock and goes in the lower left side of the back of the clock’s hollow area. It has the typical inward-pointing rounded triangular hollows of radial symmetry, I believe five of them (likely representing the five fingers). The last cog is about half the size of the previous and goes between the door and the rest of the clock somehow, near the center of the back of the clock’s face. Apparently this work is metaphorical of restoring a certain level of well-being, which did have an effect on my real body after waking in a positive sense.

This dream was partially a result of generic health-affirming work. Although it is possible to script, write, and incubate a dream exactly as wanted (at any level of in-dream awareness) in every detail with my own lifelong methods, I often use very general terms (such as “thank you for restoring me to maximum well-being” or “thank you for returning me to my healthiest state” and thousands of others) and no plot-based constructs in this case. It is also important to understand the continuity of these phrases (most people get them wrong or use incorrectly worded ones - as most commercial products have incorrect methods implemented which is something I have noted for nearly thirty years - though in some cases a placebo-based event may result with certain people). Supplements of the phrases here should be “thank you for my restoration to maximum well-being” and “thank you for my return to my healthiest state”. This is because other levels of consciousness process word forms in a different manner than the wakeful conscious mind, especially gerunds; for example, as mentioned in another entry, “healing” can have many meanings, including an “infinite now” of NOT ever healing (since ”-ing" implies ongoing and never actually completing).

The smoking scene in my dream is likely related to a product I was aware of years ago and often joked about. It was a cassette which I read about, supposedly designed to help people quit smoking. The approach used in affirmation was completely wrong and ludicrous. It was typical of invalid dream-work-based or self-hypnosis-based commercial products of the time where negative terms were used and the focus on what was NOT wanted was implemented (for example, saying “I will quit smoking” is pointless at several levels).

Method: Wake back to Bed (WBTB) after about 6 hours of sleep. I did my usual wake routine with journaling dreams, mantras (spoken and written), and dream incubation using pictures - 45 minutes. I decided to meditate using a mixture body energy work and tactile visualization to bring myself to a state where I was consciously awake and body asleep. For the energy work I started off by bouncing energy in my body from the top of my head to my toes, and then from the top of my head to my fingertips, in synch with my breathing. I could feel a tingly sensation as the energy moved back and forth through my body. Then I started to project the energy outside my body in a clockwise direction, bouncing off the walls and moving to the next hour position with each energy bounce. I was feeling and visualizing the room wherever the energy bounced, and I was slowly building a mental image of the room. After about 15 minutes of this, I started to visualize picking up coins and dropping them (tactile visualization), and I continued this until I had a good image of this happening, and then I started to visualize climbing up an endless ladder. At least one hour had passed by this point in time. The hypnagogic imagery began to take over with little or no influence from me.

My hands appeared as a transparent green color, but I could not feel them, and I was trying to pick up a glass of wine that was precariously balanced on a sand beach with waves washing over the base. I could clearly see the individual grains of sand washing around in the waves. A faint figure grabbed the glass of wine and took a drink, then he passed the glass to me, and I took a drink. I couldn’t feel the glass, or taste the wine. I placed the wine glass down in the sand, and the waves came and washed it away. Suddenly I was travelling through space! Stars were streaking past me in long lines (like Star Trek), and then I entered a dream in a perfectly lucid state.

There was a grain truck parked under two grain chutes. Grain was pouring into the truck, and dust was blowing everywhere. I turned and looked at the man beside me, and then I returned to the void, where I was once again consciously awake with my body asleep. Without any warning whatsoever, I was in another lucid dream sitting at a desk. This was more vivid and clear than waking life. There was a massive 50 inch monitor in front of my playing what looked like a home movie with no sound. The desk was in the middle of a large rectangular room, with no other furniture present. There were two large digital clocks mounted along the top edge of the monitor, one more on the left, and a forth one on the right. The digital clocks were moving fast forward in time, and some were moving in backwards in time. One hour would happen in 2 or 3 seconds. To the right was a large rack of electronic equipment, and on the left was a computer. My hands were perfectly formed (exactly my hands) and they were resting on a keyboard. I then remembered my mantra to meet with my daughter, so I decided to head off and find her.

I stood up and turned to the right, but I was feeling very weak, and I thought I was losing lucidity, so I focussed on my hands, but they were very clear and everything was vivid (I wasn’t losing lucidity), so I started to walk towards the door at the far end of the room, but I was quickly brought to an abrupt stop. Something was pulling on my head and left arm, so I turned around to see what it was. Totally to my surprise, my left arm had IV tubes coming out of it, and I was hooked up to a rectangular machine that was placed to the left of my chair! Wires were coming out of my head and they were also connected to the machine. I instantly felt faint and I fell to the floor, and the next thing I knew I was back in bed, consciously awake with my body asleep. I could hear electrostatic popping and fizzing noises and my body felt as if it was discharging energy.

While in the void, I decided to try ‘the barrel roll visualization’ to get back into a lucid dream (I had done this once before). This is very similar to being in a Gravitron G Force ride. First, I started off visualizing I was spinning in bed in a lengthwise axis. Then once it felt like it was happening, I gradually moved into a barrel roll, and finally I began increasing the diameter of the barrel until it was about 100 feet across. It appeared as though I was in a large checkered cylinder. The cylinder vanished and shot off towards a horizon line. As I approached the horizon line I realized it was actually a mountain range, and that I was flying over the ocean. I was coming in so fast that I didn’t have time to swerve upwards and miss the mountains, and I flew right into them! Very unexpectedly, I barely slowed down, but I was jolted in a downward angle into the earth. I could still see! Glowing red sparks and wispy, black, ash smoke was floating everywhere, and I wanted to get out of the ground, back up in the air, so I angled upwards. Shortly thereafter I was shot out of the ground, and I was flying over a small town.

There was a three storey tall, energy being lumbering down one of the streets, and he was taller than most of the buildings. Besides his enormous size, he was also glowing bright blue, and was semi-transparent. I didn’t like what I was seeing, so I flew away from him and I landed on a crowded street. I then began to call for my daughter to come and visit with me. Suddenly I began to lose lucidity, and all went black. I was lying in bed once again, in the void, consciously awake, with my body asleep. I tried to do ‘the barrel role visualization’ once again, but I fell asleep. This was a very cool lucid dream experience!