Recent DJ Posts

Ritual: WTB 11:30pm, WBTB 5–5:45am. Took supplements (l-theanine, alpha-gpc, piracetam, bacopa), did about half an hour of relaxation/breathing/counting on my back. Toward the end had brief series of vivid hypnagogic images (close up of eagle's head, view of a forest) then snapped back to full wakefulness. Not worried, this always happens. Turned on my left side to fall asleep. Woke with dream at 6:30am, so I had probably been asleep for about fifteen minutes.

DILD, "Time Stop": I've just finished a multi-course meal at a nice restaurant and I'm standing a the bar afterward, where the proprietor is offering me a special drink. While she prepares it, I notice that I can barely stand, my legs are crumpling under me, and I stagger as I try to regain my balance, hoping no one will notice. I kneel at the bar, which is low enough to accommodate this, to disguise my inability to stand. This is so embarrassing... am I drunk? I think back and don't understand how that could be, since I've only had ordinary wine pairings with my meal. Then I realize the truth: ohhhh... that incredible heaviness in my legs, that's just because I'm falling asleep!

I'm relieved to understand what is going on, and also impressed that I can think so clearly about the fact that my real body is falling asleep in bed without disrupting the dream. I decide to go on with the narrative that is playing out because I really want to try this drink. The bartender sets an unusual glass in front of me. It is shaped like a particular wooden table made by Isamu Noguchi circa 1941, but with a semi-circular indentation on top for the drink. It is made of hollow light blue glass and the interior is full of crushed ice, to keep the drink cool. The whole thing is very small, like a sake cup, and the indentation looks like it holds less than an ounce of liquid.



I try the drink, which is a clear liquid, pleasantly bright and floral in taste, in flavor a bit like St. Germain but lighter-bodied and not so cloyingly sweet. I complement the bartender and ask what it is made of. "Catfish liqueur," she replies. I'm impressed! I wouldn't have guessed, as the taste was not the least bit fishy. Another girl asks how the drink is made, and narrates as the bartender shows her: "So you mix it with that blue stuff, then top with..." I look at the bottle she's indicating. It is a gallon-sized jug made of translucent plastic containing a clear liquid. It reminds me of those extra-large bottles of Heinz white vinegar, but the shape of the bottle is more like that typically used for laundry detergent. There is a graphic of naturalistic forest trees on the front of the bottle which makes it resemble the cover of a nature magazine. The brand name clearly reads: "Gesuckt." From the name I assume it is a foreign import, probably German, and wonder if I can buy it at any of my usual grocery stores.

My earlier thought about "fishiness" has now taken the form of a chunk of sardine or mackerel that I discover lodged between my gum and upper lip. I reason that it must have come from a dish I ate during the meal earlier. I prod it out with my tongue and finish chewing it. Meanwhile I'm walking away from the bar toward the restaurant area. There are a lot of people in the room, which reminds me—hey! I could try the TOTM again, see if I can do it properly this time.

"Freeze!" I say loudly, but people keep going about their business. I remember the difficulty I had with this last time, and it also reminds me that I'm supposed to be stopping time, so I switch wording. "Time stop!" I command. I say it a few times, still not getting much result, so I decide an explanation is needed, addressing the room in a loud voice so that everyone can hear. "I said 'time stop!' That means everybody stops moving. Time stop! Time stop, everybody!"

I look around and find that everyone has frozen in place. Okay, this is better, I seem to have gotten the point across. Now I'm supposed to put someone in an embarassing position. I didn't plan ahead for this, so I'm going to have to come up with an idea on the fly. My gaze falls on a stout old lady in the middle of the room. I walk over and unbutton her light blue jacket and white blouse. Inside, she's wearing a pink bra, and I'm relieved to see that it has a front closure, so I unhook it and reveal her breasts. I hope I'm not being too mean, but remind myself that it's just a dream so there will be no lasting harm.

Now I have to get everyone moving again. What's the opposite of "time stop"? I try some variants: "Uhhh... go. Start. Start moving." This works, but meanwhile I had taken my eyes off the old lady to check whether everyone else was back in motion, and when I look at her again, her clothes are already back in order and no one is reacting as if they had seen anything unusual. I chide myself for not paying closer attention. I'd better try again.

"Time stop! Time stop!" This time the DCs react much more promptly, like they're getting the hang of it. Okay, what should I do this time? I look around for ideas. Among a group of people in one corner are two meathead-looking guys. I go over and start posing them really close together, much closer than a couple of straight men would normally be comfortable with. As I move and angle their bodies, I notice that it doesn't feel so much like time has stopped as that they are just playing along while I reposition them, and there's some difficulty, maybe even slight resistance, as I lean their faces together as though they were about to kiss. Finally I get it just how I want, so that their lips are almost touching. Then I step back a few paces so that when I restart time, I'll have a clear view of both their reactions and the people around them.

This time I restart the scene with more confidence, like I'm getting the hang of this too. "Okay, renew!" I command, punctuating the signal by clapping the first two fingers of my right hand into the palm of my left. It feels like being a movie director.

I watch closely as people start moving again. I was hoping the two guys would either react with comic embarrassment or, even better, be overcome by a latent attraction and really start kissing. Instead, they simply draw away from one another without any expression or commentary, and no one around them takes any visible notice. I'm disappointed with the blasé behavior of all these DCs, but I have to admit it makes sense: they're projections of my own mind, after all, and I'm fairly blasé myself most of the time.

Observing a dog walking through the room, I momentarily wonder if I should try again, but the lackluster reactions of the DCs has sapped my motivation, and I feel that I have adequately performed the TOTM. I wonder if I should wake up and write... but the dream seems stable, and I'm reluctant to end it earlier than I have to. However, I'm aware how easy it is to start forgetting the details if I don't record them promptly, so I do the next best thing and start verbally recounting my memories of the scene, to help fix them in mind for later. As I'm doing this I end up waking anyway.

Interlude: From 6:30 to 7:15am I record my notes and then return to bed, going to sleep with no further techniques. I wake up at 8:30am from another DILD.

DILD, "Sphere": The plot has been going on for a while but I don't remember much detail from before I become lucid. I'm sitting on the toilet in the bathroom of a house that belongs to a male friend I've been hanging out with for most of the dream [!WL]. I feel guilty when I notice that I've almost used up all his toilet paper. I tell myself that I should really stop giving into the urge to use the bathroom when I'm dreaming. This isn't waking life, where it actually makes sense to go if you feel like you have to. In a dream it's completely pointless, a waste of time, and kind of gross. If I'm doing this, it's because I'm too caught up in the idea of a physical body. I'm reminded of something Sageous wrote in the forum, how he doesn't really have a body in dreams anymore. I should work on getting less attached to mine.



I get up and go over to the bathroom sink, studying my reflection in the mirror. It's actually a close resemblance, as far as I can tell through the mask that covers most of my features. The mask is reminiscent of the one worn by Michio Ito in his 1915 "Fox Dance," though mine lacks the long snout and doesn't cover my mouth. Also my eyes are clearly visible through the sockets. The fact that I am wearing a mask does not strike me as odd, and instead I ponder what to do about my body. I don't think I can eliminate the idea of it all at once, so it might be best to proceed in stages. What's the most radical distortion I can think of? I know! I'll become a sphere.

I keep watching my reflection as my face starts swelling and widening. It looks disturbing at first, like obesity or an illness, and I have to focus on making my whole body expand, not just my face. Not only can I witness this happening in the mirror, I can actually feel it. As I become rounder and rounder, I remind myself that there is no reason a sphere should only see out of two frontally positioned eyes. I should try to expand my concept of vision to include the area behind me. This only partly works: I'm now getting visual feed from what seems like the opposite side of my sphere, and can perceive the rim of the tub and a bit of the floor and shower curtain, all very close up. However in the process I lose my frontal vision, and as I try to experience both visual fields at once I become disoriented and start rotating in place, which makes sense given that I'm a sphere with nothing to stand on anymore. The disorientation gets so bad that I'm afraid it might disrupt the dream, so I let my body snap back to its familiar structure, satisfied that I had a reasonable success for my first try.

I look back in the mirror to check my appearance again. My reflection looks like it did before, and I'm still convinced that it is just like waking life—although in retrospect I realize that my dream-self had a brunette bob rather than the shoulder-length brown hair of WL. I'm still wearing the mask and want to look at the face underneath, so I take it off. There are more layers of mask under the first, and I peel them off one by one, until I'm finally just wearing glasses, and take those off too. Finally my face is uncovered, and I am satisfied that it is a good likeness. I notice an unusual vividness to my eyes, which are sparkling and happy, and I am pleased with my appearance.

Stepping outside, I realize that I'm still carrying my glasses. Should I just throw them away? I feel a natural reluctance, but remind myself that it's a dream, it doesn't matter. Then I reason that I might want to use them later: this could be a good trick to improve focus if the dream gets hazy. Sure, I could always manifest a fresh pair, but that will be easier if I condition my expectations by saving these now. So I slip the glasses into my jacket pocket.

What should I do now? I'm in a great mood and have no particular task in mind, so I decide to explore the dream world. Perched alone on a grassy hillside I see a strange building, very gaudy, with red roofs under a gold dome: it looks like a cross between an old McDonald's and a sultan's palace. I realize it is a restaurant of some kind and head over there.

I'm still feeling unusually happy and excited as I walk in, so I pump my fist and go "Woo!" My enthusiasm has been making the people around me more friendly, I notice, and remind myself that I should try to be more like this in WL. The restaurant is small inside, like a cafe, with a several tables and a counter where I go up to order. Despite the counter it is not a fast food restaurant: the menu consists of about six innovative dishes printed on a small square of white paper.

"What's the tastiest thing on the menu?" I ask, then realize I have a craving for spicy food and ask, "I mean the tastiest spicy dish."

"The D-4," replies the server. I check the menu and the description lists this as a big steak dish, which sounds too heavy and will take forever to prepare, so I look at the appetizers instead. There are only three listed, but two of them sound like they consist of just three pieces of fish, served nigiri sushi style. The fish that interests me looks like langoustine, but with the soft, ribbed texture of monkfish. The server tries to warn me that it's a very small dish, but I say, "I know. It looks like someone has already left one here," pointing to the piece sitting on the menu.

I put in my order and take a place at a small table, then get up to think this over. Can I really commit valuable dream time to sitting down for a whole meal, even a small one? Shouldn't I be doing something more productive? Maybe I should just leave. But I consider that the experience might be interesting, and I can even try to combine it with a task—the circumstances are ideal to work on summoning, something I've always struggled with.

I walk back over and tell the server, "Actually, I'm here to meet somebody." I pull out my phone, wondering who to call among the characters I've tried (unsuccessfully) to summon over the years. But then I notice that someone is already sitting at my table, so I go over to see who it is. I've never seen this guy before: he looks like he's in his twenties, with straight, mousy-brown hair and thin, very pointed features.

"Hi, are you here to meet me?" He nods.

Okay, I think, rolling with the circumstances, this could work. I'll meet someone new, like a blind date. "What's your name?" I inquire.

"I'm Denny, a crass ass." He looks bashfully down at the table.

This odd term rings a bell. Didn't I, much earlier in the dream, long before I got lucid, meet a guy named Paul who used the exact same term for himself? What an oddity; I don't think I've ever heard that term in life. What could it mean?

"Did you say, 'a crass ass'?" I ask, enunciating clearly. The young man nods.

"Why would you call yourself that?" I am genuinely mystified.

"It's what my friends call me."

Unfortunately I woke up before I could find out anything more!

It was bright, cold morning. The sky was covered by a few clouds. With my older sister we drove to school, where my practical lessons teacher told me to take a bus ticket, and drive to work. I was wearing my forester uniform. I took the bus, and drove to the nearest big city. From the bus stop I went to a square through the alleys, looking at the ages old cobblestone pavement, buildings covered by vines and gambrel rooftops.

When I finally arrived at the square, I saw a small restaurant building, a rusty street lamp, and some houses. I went to the restaurant, where my aunt was working. She told me to go the kitchen, and use some kind of a machine. This machine was a chopper, and from looking at it I saw that it could be easily used to shred someone to pieces. It was covered with green painting, and looked like new. I turned it on, but haven't used it. After some time my aunt come, and told me to help with the dirty dishes. I went there, and suddenly she told me to put some bread to haversack. I did it, and then helped her with washing the dishes. Then I took a bus back home. In the middle of the road the bus has broken and I had to go home on foot.

I have finally arrived at home. I was tired, in dirty forester uniform. I entered my home, and then everyone jumped out from behind furniture. They screamed Surprise! I didn't knew what to do, but I was kinda happy at the same time. Then a girl that's my friend came and hugged me. Other persons also hugged me, but I just wanted all the hugging to end. Then we hugged with the friend again. I went to another room. We were partying all the night, dancing and drinking. A few times I went to the toilet. In the end I have talked with that girl, but I can't recall what we were talking about.

Non lucid
*About to go on a date with a random dream character I realize that I already have a girlfriend and don't want to do so.I didn't immediately take out my phone as I'm driving down a main highway and try to call my girlfriend.when I attempt to call my girlfriend I reached the huge supermarket Whole Foods and they tell me I have the wrong number.the lady over the phone told me to dial a 1.I hung up the phone and tried to call my girlfriend a couple different ways but could not reach her.I thought that if I don't reach her I will just drive to her house and reconnect with her that way.as I'm going through my phone attempting to find her number I notice that there are pictures of us at a high school dancing in front of a huge crowd.also a random scene of a girl I used to date from Brazil appears.then out of nowhere I was trying to find my girlfriends number someone told me to meet my uncle Bob who in the dream was a Mexican but I am not Mexican.my uncle in the dream was a tall Mexican dude in Chevy and he told me that he's proud of me and I'm doing well.it was a very quick greeting and then he was on his way.

Bedtime: 12:20

Well, I guess bedtime doesn't determine everything.

It started off with some dream about driving and walking through an urban area trying to get my cousins to a baseball game.

Somehow or other, I wound up in what felt like the woods behind my neighborhood. It was tropical though, and everything was green. The dream was very clear despite being nonlucid. I was showing them houses that had been overgrown and abandoned many years ago. We were talking about how we would have liked to live in them in their prime.

We came to this one house, a huge four story mansion. (Or the frame of one anyway) A massive tree, about 20 feet in diameter and easily 500 feet tall had cleaved the entire frame in half, leaving only two smaller sections standing. Myself and the party of DCs (there were two or three of us total.) were hypothesizing about how the middle must have once looked.

We made our way around back, climbing over fallen trees. We saw that a river ran along the back of the house. There were waterfalls flowing from the cliff-side into the river.

"How cool would it be to live with 3...4 waterfalls in your backyard?!"

I then made an observation of some of the tropical flora. There were fern trees all around us.

This for one reason or another made me become lucid.

I stabilized briefly. I then decided that I wanted to go and see my subconscious and tell him/her/it that I wanted more lucid dreams. I shouted "I want to see my subconscious right now!"

I saw that there was a small double door between two large boulders on the forest floor. The two DCs that I was with walked through it.

I opened the door after them. It was nothing but blackness. I let myself fall in. I fell for awhile before arriving at this location suspended in the blackness.

There was a throne chair with a small child sitting in it. Built up around us was the back wall of the throne room, made out of castle stones, and the floor, made up of tiles. This crumbled away about a hundred feet from the chair in every direction, as if this one slice of the castle had been removed from the rest and placed into this void.

The child (who I guess was supposed to be my subconscious) was wearing a red king robe, golden crown and had a long scepter. Though none of this quite fit him because he was so small.

There were a couple of guards in strange white armor positioned on either side of his throne. I think Manei and Marcus manifested into the room behind me. I could feel their energies.

SubC "I am your subconscious, and I am very busy! Each time you say something to me, it's gonna cost you [some kind of special money]. You have 1,800 of it. Go!"

Me "How come so many of my efforts to lucid dream fail?"

1,750

SubC "Because you didn't do the work I gave to you. Remember Jonathan? Why is he not dead?"

Me "I did the right thing. He said that he wanted to go peacefully, so me and Manei agreed to let him go."

1,625

SubC "But that wasn't what you were supposed to do!" His tone of voice started to sound a bit whiny at this point.

Manei "If there is one thing [my name was garbled] taught me, it's that you shouldn't let other people decide who you are. You should [follow your own path or something.]

I saw that Manei had some kind of money counter for talking to this guy too. She only had about 600 of it. Marcus had no money and therefore wasn't allowed to speak.

SubC "What? You're taking his side?"

Manei (mad) "I wish I was never on your side to begin with."

SubC "Guards, show of force."

Me "Look at you. You try to control people and [mold them into what you want or something.] And when they start rebelling against you, you threaten them. [If you want people to respect you, you have to earn that respect, not force it out of them or something.]" (My ability to recall dialogue is horrible.)

1,333

SubC "Stop it! Stop it! It's not true! Guards, Seize them!" (He started sounding more and more like a whiny child.)

The two guards began to advance on me. The dream started to fade. I saw my 'money' was starting to tick down.

Me: "The way you choose to remove me from your presence rather than learn from me proves just how weak and immature you really are. When you [grow up a little], you will see that I was right about everything. I see no way we can come to an agreement if you are going to act like this."

545

The dream cut to black here. I had an FA, but somehow still remained semi lucid. I was on the steps of one of the dorm complexes at my college.

Spoiler for Sexy Toys:

There was a huge blue dildo toy. There was a bottle on the back end of it that you could fill with whatever liquid you wanted, then squeeze it and it would squirt out the front. It was also covered in this soft fabric.

I was trying to hide this object because I didn't want anyone to know that I dreamed about it. I was also thinking about how I was going to describe this scene when I woke up and started writing about it in my DJ. Dang partial lucidity.

At one point I tried to throw it away, but it wouldn't fit in the trash can. It seemed to be continually growing. Eventually it started getting so heavy that I couldn't carry it.

There was also a part where I dreamed that I was trying to send one of my cats away in a cardboard box that would float like a boat on a lake. I felt like the lake we were at had taken the place of my old middle school.

Interpretations:

I really don't know what to make of this. I don't know why my subconscious was so childlike and closed-minded. He wanted things done a particular way, his way. He wanted no part of anyone else, and didn't want to earn their respect. (Sure, sounds like a much younger me, but I'm sure a lot of us acted that way as children since we simply didn't know any better.)

I was flying, and I noticed I had a broom stick sticking out between my legs in the front, so I looked behind me, and sure enough there was the head of the broom. I realized I was flying on a broom stick. I realized this must be a dream. I think I briefly continued flying but soon after that woke up.

slowly crawling back...middle recall faint, late pretty good, but missed a major WTF moment

+ driving through the city. Walking past a strip mall, I see an open pizza shop and I want to go in. I see my son S2 there but don't want him to see me [DS], he's leaving the restaurant with his college group, I'm watching them walk by through the glass walls of the strip mall stores positioned in between us, I think they'll be heading to a Range Rover or some other fancy car. I'm in a car parking or observing someone park, the spots are small and I think the best one is the one on the corner since it will be easier to get out if other cars park too closely.

+(f) kissing ex-GF on head, ask if she's still playing T

I'm lying on the ground next to my ex-GF DB, I roll over to her and kiss her on the top of her head and ask if the's still playing the T. She says only once in a while, I respond that I can't imagine not playing, I need always to play.

+(f) congress(?), theater(?), lightning(?)

+ playing then repairing /messing with a pinball game

I'm standing playing a pinball game. My attention is focused on the flippers, and the ball which is repeatedly falling to the flippers and I'm repeatedly trying to hit it forcefully back up into the game. The ball is always almost falling between the flippers, so each time I have to do the "1-2" fast sequence of hitting one flipper then the next one in rapid succession. Finally the right flipper comes entirely off of its post and so the game is broken. I'm standing there waiting for the maintenance guy to walk by so I can get his attention to fix the thing. Eventually I just take the top glass cover off and start messing with the game myself, there is a scoring basket in the right corner near my right hand, and I drop 3 small balls in there one after the other, on the 2nd ball something turns red. I then expect to be in a super-extra scoring mode but I don't see the big scoring results that I expect.

I step back a bit from the machine and look at it, it's a car-racing themed machine with a name (forgot), and I see the orange-led-light screen with writing on it.

+ giving financial advice to a girl behind on her payments to artist(s)

I'm standing in a room with a bunch of people in a room. A girl enters and I call her to me so that I can give her my professional financial advice. She goes to the couch and sits down there instead. I go to her and say "What great service, I'm coming to you", I sit next to her and she's facing away from me but turns to face me eventually. I'm telling her about her payments and how she needs to use her income to make the payments to the artist(s) or she'll get way behind on them.

+ painter guy on deck of parent's house, I have to leave, call him back, examine can of paint and paint names in detail, day becomes night because of massive black storm clouds covering sky ("Oh my God," "Oh my God!")

I'm standing in my childhood home dining room against the wall by the glass door looking out through the curtains on to the deck, there is a worker there dressed in an orange hoodie, I don't want him to see me [DS]. He leaves and I go out and call him back. He says he is here to paint "100 acres" of space on the side of our house. I'm holding a small can of paint that is in the model of our house, with the names of the paint colors painted in representative locations: the eaves under the roof, the upper section, the lower section, I'm reading these names, they're all slight variations of a deep green/grey color, all the names are from the same series of colors. The guy shows he's familiar with these names, these are standard paint names so he'll be able to find/use the right ones.

I notice that all of a sudden it's extremely dark out on the deck. It's as dark as night almost, I'm going to have to turn on a light inside the house so that he can see. I go out on the deck and look up around the corner to the right into the sky: there are heavy, very dark clouds there , I think this is practically tornado weather [which don't exist in this area], I expect to see a funnel cloud, I see some whisps of cloud in an almost vague funnel shape but no tornado. It's still really dramatic and I say "Oh my God! Oh my God!".

I do not want to wait around for him to finish, since I have to go, but if I don't wait then maybe he'll just leave and not finish the job.

Morning of March 5, 2015. Thursday.



Johnny Cash sings in the background, sounding somewhat distant yet somehow close at the same time, like an old anachronistic Buick with a loudspeaker atop following me from perhaps a block away. “I ride an old paint, I lead an old Dan, I’m off to Montan’ for to throw the hooley-ann.” The voice is somewhat familiar in a different way, somewhat melancholy, the nature of the “reality” of this deserted 1800s half-defined world. Not much to look at but a pale brick wall in the late evening, a wall that flows past me as I ride a weird clay-like bay roan horse into an eerily empty town. Or so it seems. There are only a few men in the streets of the town, as it is so late at night. Is this Laredo? “I spied a young cowboy all wrapped in white linen, wrapped in white linen as cold as the clay…” (As cold as a clay horse?)

However, without explanation, without a backstory, without even a false memory to build a nonsensical foundation to explain my location and direction, I find myself riding Pokey into an old western town. My clay horse will not behave. His mouth grows and “roars” like the “roaring worm” from “Eraserhead”. Johnny Cash’s singing remains a statement of fact in the background. These cowboys cannot live here. My horse will swallow them.

Eraserhorse will eat everyone eventually, and I cannot do much to stop him.

---

This dream utilizes coalescence waking symbolism, a type of waking symbolism where the dream self or other dream features are rendered as being metaphorically “swallowed” into waking consciousness.

---

I confess that I was never a fan of “Gumby” and went out of my way to avoid it whenever I could, even as a child. I found it over-the-top irritating. It was like a trend in society to force children to watch certain things as a form of punishment - and many forms of “entertainment” still seem as such.

---

Friday 20/2/15
Meditating on my third eye I fail asleep and noticed my dream body entering a building through a slightly opened door. The outside felt like a grave while the inside felt like a well lighted room. I had the consciousness of leaving a friend behind, in the grave into the room and the feeling of guilt made me went back to the grave and I felt an unbearable pressure of the gravestone against my body, and I could think of nothing but to wake up and I deed woke up. I will bear this pressure next time to see it end.

Sunday 1/2/2015
I saw myself in school trying to repair my shoe with the shoe-maker but never succeeded in repairing it. So, I started walking to my lodge bare footed. I was walking like a man in a hurry when I saw people trying to kill a mighty snake, dangerous cobra. Curiosity cut up with me so I stood and watched what was happening when this snake run pass me and I focused all my intent on killing it. I was picking up stones and throwing at it when I noticed that the head has been separated from the body, then and there the desire to take the snap short of the snake came to mind and I remembered I had I phone on me, but now I couldn’t find it. The thought of looking for this phone made me weak and immediately I woke up and I was like, “so, this is a dream”.

Thursday 26/2/2015
I felt my consciousness sinking down from my feet with my brain as the pivot point. I felt that all my consciousness has left my body except that of the brain. It felt as if I had two brains, my real brain and my consciousness brain (dream body brain). I was afraid of the sensation because it felt real and powerful and this made me indecisive. I did found myself in an unknown place filed with people running to some place important to them. The dream was blurry, but I was still lucid. So I stopped one of the boys with my two hands and looked at him directly into his face, he was reluctant to look back at me. I asked him aggressively “where am I” several times and he replied “you are in Ifitedunu (my village)” pointing towards the main road while telling me that if I get to the road I should be able to board a bus that will take me to Awka (the capital of my state). And I left him and headed to the main road. On getting to main road I took left and as I was walking down the road I lost the dream and woke up. I believe that fear took away my focus and my focus is my dream goal which is meditation.

Tuesday 24/2/2015
I laid down to sleep between 6AM and 7AM and felt the feeling of my consciousness in motion and speed. I wasn’t scared and it wasn’t strange because I have felt it severally. I could see nothing but darkness and I began to pray, not because I was afraid but because I wanted to gain control which I did gain in FA it was so real that I made fun of RC and when I finally awoke, I was so surprised at my mind’s trick. I didn’t actually do Reality Check because I felt there was no need of doing it.

[B][SIZE=4]
I had a dream 15/02/2015
Where I, Amandi and one other person (I think he is Paul) lying down in our village room, Ifitedunu. We were talking about how difficult it is to survive in the village. Amandi was restless and couldn’t sleep so he started walking around and my father caught him and warned him………… I went into the kitchen to check if anything was lost, I saw meat placed on the cover of big cooking port and I think I saw another one in the inner side of the kitchen. Then I took a bite of the first one and left. On turning to return to my room I saw my father at the entrance of the kitchen door and he handed to me uncooked meat (the leg part of an unknown animal) and told me that it was Nnagi (my uncle) that gave it to him for me. I accepted the meat while suspecting that it wasn’t ordinary. Then the dream switched to another dream-let.

#418 - MILD - 5:13AM

Coffee (Caffeine) 2tbsp brewed. 4tbsp sugar and about 1/8 cup milk
I wake about 3:45am from a vivid dream and decide it's too close to my 4:00AM alarm to go back to sleep so I go ahead and get up just long enough to drink my coffee. I return to bed thinking about the dream I just had and what it would have been like if I had become lucid. I quickly drop into sleep.


I wake my daughters up to get ready for school. There is some conversation and I randomly climb out a window in a hallway. The house is a two story and I come out on a low part of the roof. I am trapped because a woman who looks like Michonne in a Sonic uniform is on a ladder that is some how blocking my exit. I tap her on the lag and politely ask her to move. She tells me to hold on so I just find away to squeeze past. As I climb down off the roof I tell the woman and her associate that I am leaving for work so if they have any questions ask my wife. I tell them to just call for Janice (That's my mom's name... awkward.) I feel like this isn't the right name so I start to tell them they can just call for Mrs. Coon but I stop myself because they might thing I am trying to make an inappropriate joke. I wonder why they are here and what they are working on. Oh they must be installing tile. On the roof? Maybe it's something else.

I as I drop down I land inside the house. There is a ladder on a wall that is made of tape measure. I fiddle with it noting how flimsy it is. I decide it probably won't hold my weight so I leave it alone. I remember that I should be getting to work so I check the time on my cell phone in my pocket. 11:25am. Wow I am really late!

I look up and find myself at work. Robert M. is saying something about taking a half day vacation then says he better clock in. I think it's a little late for half day so I check the time again. 10:10AM. I become confused about the time and decide I better just clock in. I start typing my employee number and pause as I recall how I was just in my 'house' and suddenly I am at work. Then there's the time thing...Then, it finally dawns on me. I must be dreaming. I feel a wry smile come on my face and I step away from the computer. The dream collapses at this point, but I manage to get things back in order by focusing on what I should be seeing. Things are a bit unstable now but I think I can work with it.

I wonder about goals, but when I see a bulletin board I think I should try reading it. I do my best read out loud the wobbly and changing words. [something][something] on a cob. That make absolutely no sense. Now the dream is really unstable so I try rubbing my hands then the carpet. I notice it has a red and gold pattern.

Things get a bit more stable so I decide to walk outside while still rubbing my hands. I can't help but feel that I am literally holding the dream together by pure concentration. I tell myself there is plenty of time and I should relax. I feel my shoulders drop a bit and become at ease. Because of this the dram instantly fades away. I try DEILD with the phase method, but I am too wide awake. I decide to spend some time meditating before I get up.