memorable

Flying Alligator Attack

I was at Mike A's house, though it didn't look like his house. I saw a school bus drive up his back yard and through his front yard. I was upset the driver would do that, but he had an easment, so it was OK.

I went out and got in a school bus and followed him down the front yard. As I went down the hill, I no longer saw the other bus, but I did see an alligator. It flew up into a tree about 30' up. That seemed like a scary proposition to me.

I drove back up the hill towards Mike's house, but I was intrigued by the flying alligator (that scared me so bad). I drove back down the hill and the alligator glided out of the tree.

Now my bus didn't have a roof. I was exposed. I turned my bus back towards the house. The alligator flew up and swooped down landing near my bus. I got very nervous, and my bus was slowing down.

Then there was water all around, and then I was in the water. The alligator was going to come get me. I wondered if I could wrestle the alligator. All you have to do is grab the snout. All their power is in the closing of their mouth. I knew that was easier said than done.

I thought about what it would be like to drown. I could see the murky water.

The End

--

XXX Lucid

At one point during lucidity, I tried to shoot lightning out of my palms and failed, so I guess there is a dream fragment missing.

--

I was at an indoor pool. The lights were out. There was more light where I was at the shallow end than the deep end.

I dove into the pool and wondered if it was deep enough, so I decided to curve up and come out of the pool. As I came up, I decided to see if I could come up and out of the pool and fly up.

I did start to fly up, but then I was out of the pool again where I started. I saw a beautiful young lady with dark, wavy brown hair at the other end of the pool. She wore a maroon and white bikini. I realized I was lucid and said, "I'd like to see her nude!

She looked surprised and I wondered if I was dreaming after all, then someone said she had smiled. I was confident I was dreaming again.

She was next to me now. I thought about what my friend KristaNicole does to stabilize. I yelled, "I am lucid. 100% lucidity!" I rubbed my hands together. It felt bad. I looked down and I had gause on my hand. I was happy to stabilize though. Then I spun around slowly. My partner said, "Both ways; it's better for both of us!" We spun around the other way.

Then we locked in a giant, wet kiss. She was wondering if that was what she was looking for. I gave her another kiss and told her it was exactly what I was looking for. She agreed.

I looked down at her breast. She was flat as a board. I touched her flat chest. I don't get into a flat chest, but I really liked the girl, so I didn't care. I rubbed it a little.

All of a sudden we were in a room with my grandmother (passed on many years ago), and a couple other people. They were all in bed. We took our clothes off and walked down the hall to another room.

I realized that if I wanted to get dressed again, I would have to walk naked into the room with my grandmother and would likely be in trouble, so I pulled a blanket out of a basket to cover myself up with later.

She had her bikini on again. She was going to take it off, but I told her no. I wanted to reach in and feel her vagina. I did reach in but just felt her hair.

I then got on her chest. I put some "lip gloss" on her lips. She was surprised. She said she'd been beaten up before, but that had never happened. I was kind of surprised and sorry she'd been beaten up, but she seemed really happy, so I didn't worry about it.

She then took it.

I soon woke up.

I'm happier about using stabilization techniques than the awesome sex, but that was good too.

I was in a library, apparently in the horror section. I saw three books. Two had covers of trees in sepia tone. They had dirt roads, and were really eerie. The first was titled "incendia" with a small i

The title "incendia" would be a command in Spanish telling someone to burn something. In my dream in meant "burried treasure." The book was about a treasure burried in some really scary woods.

The next book was titled "ha habducida" which meant "you have been abducted." Again, this was set in some really scary looking woods.

The third book made this one of the best dreams I've ever had. There was a Tyrannosaurus Rex chasing a little boy about age 4. The Tyrannosaurus was painted in a patchwork of pastel colors. The boy was a shadow. The title of the book was "GOD HATES YOU"

The boy was supposed to be the only person in this prehistoric world. I thought about the setting and understood the title.

I thought about this collection of books and wondered what would inspire someone to read them. I then thought that if I were a librarian, I would probably read every book in the library including these books as I'd want to be able to say that I had read every book in the library.

Dec.21st, 2011, Wednesday. GM+Choline

I wrote a little contract again to have a lucid tonight. Read Waggoner’s book, did my RCs and my mantra. I also gave thanks for my previous LDs. And I got me my #9.

DR #1- I’m in a back seat behind a driver in my own car. I should be driving and I’m not happy that someone else is.
DR #2- My cousin K
I remembered lots more, but couldn’t wake myself up to write them down for good 20 minutes, and by then that’s all I remembered.

Took GM 4mg at 4:05am.
Tried to either WILD, or if that didn’t work, just fall asleep. Woke up from LD at 5:45

LD and the experience:
At first no visuals, my field of view is dark grey, just like proper backside of your eyelids should look like Then suddenly BAM. Lights turn on, my whole view gets bright and a graphic of top part of classic alarm clock shows up in bright golden color on white (like backlit) background, together with headrush.

I get all excited and I know I shouldn’t so I try to calm down. Then the movie strip starts with some black and white pictures. They are going by at blazing speed. All I can think of is “yes, yes, dream, dream”.

I start to feel/wish to get my dream body hover over my sleeping body and I feel my whole body levitate some inches above my bed. I see my room awash in dark green, as if I was in a pond with green water (just like last time, when I saw my room like this).

I start to will my body to move out of position over my bed. First my head moves over carpet, then my body follows. I’m still in laying down position, just turned by maybe 15 degrees, so my head leads the way.

I start to float over my carpet next to my bed. I’m going through the kitchen, speeding up a little. The whole time I keep saying “keep going”. Then there is a wall separating me from my neighbor’s apartment. I will myself to go through it.

Inside the wall is dark and longer than I thought it will be. I expect to enter neighbor’s room, but no. I emerge in a small room, I feel like its underground. Looks like something you would find in Italy - a cellar type of place. The room is whitewashed and the paint has fallen off in some places. You can see masonry underneath. I’m standing up now.

I don’t like this place. In a hurry to get out of there, I forget to RC or stabilize. By the way, I usually forget to do that when entering an LD by WILD. I go through the nearest wall and I visualize a nice beach behind it. But no, there is another room similar to previous one. I feel a need to get out.

I look to my right and there is a two wing glass door, with one side wide open. There is a street at night behind it. I decide to exit here. By the time I get to the door, I’m already flying. Just like I used to in my previous LD, but not in my very last one. I hover couple of feet over the street. Look up at the sky and see the moon. As I look better, I open my eyes and I’m awake in my bed. RC couple of times in disbelief that it’s over. But it’s over. I get up to write it down.

DR at 7:18am
A girl from church charity comes to the house and gives a boy and a girl living there some swimsuits. As I’m putting them away, I notice, that they change pattern and colors as I hold them. Decide to go and show it to people in the house. I show them the swimsuit, then hide it behind my back and when we see it again, it looks completely different. We are all amazed.

The lady in the house bought some old furniture and I notice, there are some bad forces associated with them. There is a lady, I don’t really remember what I have done to her, but we fought and next thing I see, she is floating in a canal with green water and some algae growing on the sides. She is looking at us and smirking, as if she wasn’t hurt.
A delivery guy brings another piece of furniture. He walks straight to the kitchen a pours himself a shot of vinegar. I told the lady, she has to send the furniture back.

I’m trying to sleep and LD.

Then I’m standing in front of some cages made of walls. First cage has a boarded-up window. I poke at it with a stick. An old, really dirty guy opens the board unexpectedly.
Next cage has two lions behind a screen window. I also poke at it.

21/12/11
Cannot recall anything, 1 WBTB attempt (1 point)

22/12/11

1 WBTB attempt (1 point)

I was in what appeared to be the turret of a castle, climing the spiral staircase higher and higher until I reached one of the arrow slits with a small area to stand below it. I stopped here and looked out, I can't remember what I saw but then somebody shouted up the stairs and came after me. I tried to run but my legs froze up and I couldn't move. This woman who looked to be in her 40's emerged at the top of the staircase where I was. "We can't have you telling people about this" she sneered. Then the woman grabbed me by the arm and forced me up the rest of the stairs, we arrived in a small circular room. There were chains everywhere and what appeared to be blood stains on some of the walls. I could see what was coming, anybody who walked in here could easily tell that it was a torture chamber. I had to get out, I had to find a way! The woman left no loopholes or gaps where I could run away and she chained me up so that I was suspended by my hands, dangling in the air. She turned around and I could hear her opening a box of some kind, when she turned back around the woman was holding small black box about the size of your average box of matches. It had two metal prongs on the end of it making the object instantly recognisable as a taser or electricution device of some sort. She looked at me grinning like some drugged scientist before sticking the two prongs under my shirt and into my stomach. The pain was intense as the high voltage electricity pulsed through my body. I was squirming and thrashing about madly, trying to lose contact between the prongs and me. I was seeing this in 3rd person view and as the view zoomed out back through the door I could see her electricuting me again and again. Even though in third person I could still feel the pain, I'm surprised it didnt wake me up.
Then I appeared in a corridor with white walls and a disgusting brown carpet. Up ahead the was a 90 degree corner to the left, I turned it to find myself in a room with one long table in the middle. Behind one side of the table was a glass wall, and behind that; nothingness. I looked but there was just a grey smokey mist. Around the table were all my old friends from school having lunch so I went and sat next to one of my closest friends E.G and she asked where I'd been. I was about to say but then I remembered the torture I went through just minutes ago, so I said I was busy. Then everybody finished lunch, got up and started to move around. In all the confusion I bumped into someone (A.W another person from my school) He took it the wrong way and started having a go at me. It looked like he was going to lash out at me but then my friends appeared at my side telling him to back off.
The dream ended here. (Full dream- 1 point)

The torture was terrible, it was so intense it even shows up in my sleep graph

Oh well I'm not going to give up!

1) I am still in school, panicking about a 3D model I had due and hadn't done yet. Go to a math class and forget the homework. Luckily, I realize that I am currently on break from school, but I don't make the step to lucidity... Sad.

2) I am in my sister's room, and people are attacking my house. I somehow know that they are in the walls, and am semi-lucid. I (somehow) use telekinesis as some sort of x-ray, highlighting people's silhouette with a light green color. Controlling the vision with my left hand, I use my right to fire a blast of small beads of energy, blasting holes in the wall like a shotgun.

3) My roommate and I are in our dorm room, back from christmas break. I ask him how his holidays were, and we chat for a bit.

4) This image. I saw this in waking life on a cardboard box today, and it triggered a vague memory of me seeing it earlier, in my dreams. Deja vu...


5) I was LUCID, and in an office setting. And that's all I remember at this point. Maybe writing dreams more than 12 hours after you wake up is a bad idea...

6) I remember having my fedora, and being LUCID. Trying to program it with thoughts so it would function as I want it to, as an infinite storage space. It was like teaching a dog a trick. I put something in it but it didn't go off to the pocket dimension, so I tried again till it worked.

7) Burn Notice like dream. I was the spy, replaying (I had a feeling I was retracing what had happened before, or that this was a story that had been told before) a certain scene. It was in the ocean, myself being on a small boat. Unfortunately, this boat was heading down an intake into a water purification plant, that frothed as the machine sucked it in. I abandoned ship before I was pulled into it, only to end up in a similar predicament. I had to take a leap of faith and swim down into a submerged tunnel and trust I didn't drown before getting to air... Nope! Not doing that. I went up onto the land the tunnel burrowed into, and made my way onto a massive, floating, metallic structure. Maybe a fort or base? Not entirely sure. I jumped off the structure, only to realize how tall it was... Hundreds of feet above the water, I maneuvered myself in the air to avoid hitting a large fishing boat.

Um...I blame this dream on reading Oneironaut's dream journal before bed...

There were some DV members in this dream, but I am just going to leave it vague.

It was the next semester at college, and I decided to be proactive this semester and join a club. The club was stationed in our dormitory, and it met nearly everyday in a dark office room.

Everything was fine at first. The club was just a meeting place for people with similar interests.

Over time, the club began to centralize its power until it developed, basically, into a cult.

The cult was headed by a man, who was often influenced by another woman in the club.

She reminded me of Bellatrix.

The cult took a dark turn for the worse when the woman announced that it had always been her fantasy to kill a person, and then dissect them.

Thus, the cult rapidly evolved into a murder-cult.

Everyday, the ring leader would order the members, who were lower in power, to find a victim. They would lure the victim into our dark, stone room, where the ringleader would then usually slit his or her throat.

After killing the victim, they would set his or her body on the table and cut apart the innards.

When they were finished, they ordered their members to dispose of the corpse in the abandoned highschool down the street.

A few of us realized that this is NOT the club that we had signed up for!

One of the girls decided to stand up against the members who were abusing their power. She told them off and said that she was not only leaving this group, but calling the cops.

The next day, when we came to the club/cult meeting, we found her corpse on the table. It had been made known to us that if anyone dare leave this cult or step out of line, this would be the result.

The situation kept getting darker and darker. The ringleader had suspicions that people were on to us. They would give us strange looks.

One gloomy evening, when the ring leader and several of his followers were in engaging in the mutilation of their most recent victim, I was finding myself barely able to take this anymore. I knew that there had been a silent resistance forming, but all of us seemed powerless against them.

I knew that any minute, I was about to stand up and scream at the top of my lungs. There was a fire growing inside me.

I was merely seconds from telling them off when a student walked in the door, which the ringleaders had forgotten to lock.

"Oh, wrong classroom," he muttered at first. But when his eyes caught sight of the mutilated corpse on the table he took a few steps back and ran out of the room.

"Make it look like nothing happened here!" The ringleader ordered, suddenly. But everyone was too paralyzed to do anything about the situation. The members who had little power, but were involved in the group enough to struggle for more power, were the only ones who had decided to actually follow the orders of the ringleader. They disposed of the body and cleaned up the crime scene before the cops arrived.

I decided, from that day on, that I was done with clubs. Never again.

I went back to my dorm, realizing that I would probably need therapy for the rest of my life to get over that. Rumors were already spreading all over the school about a cult that would kill and mutilate people.

My room mate caught wind that I had been involved in this cult and pushed me down the stairs while yelling about how wrong it is to kill twenty-two people. I wanted to tell her that I had nothing to do with the slaying of these people, but I knew that that statement was false. If I could have worked up the courage to alert the authorities even after the first slaying, twenty-one people could still be alive.

I was already hearing about the arrests of the ringleader and his closest followers, and I knew that they were coming for me too.

I looked out my dorm window, and wished that a blue-purple feather would fall down from the sky, and I wished that I could sprout beautiful blue-purple wings and just fly away...

For a short period of time I decided that I would not record any OBE attempts that were not successful. By calling them OBE attempts I created a negative connotation. This was before I discovered Jack Canfield's book, "Key to Living the Law of Attraction." Anyhow there is one experience that I remember clearly but I did not write down or did not find in my DJs.

I was going through the process of getting out of my body by putting my body to sleep. I was deeply relaxed. Some time may have passed before I suddenly realized that I could feel my hand on my leg. That was weird because I was sitting in my recliner with my hands on the armrests my physical arms and physical hands were still on the armrests at the time. The instant that I realized that I had another hand from somewhere touching my leg the sensation went away.

Put my body asleep. Try to find the vibrations. Passed out briefly and when I "came to" I felt the vibrations. I felt them one other time when reaching .This method from Robert Monroe's, "Journeys Out of Body" does work, but I have not yet found the best point to "converge", for lack of a better word. When I "came to" I felt vibrations, and then tried to increase them, also trying to converge. Vibrations faded. Tried "third-eye" focus, too much strain on the eyes looking up and in. Feel better about being slowly relaxed. Kept my target, "Etheric83" in mind. Tried to stretch my arms up or towards the dresser at the foot of my bed when I felt them in a higher position than they should be. Partial separation of arms. Sensation faded quickly. My position through this was on my back, head to my right, mouth breathing. Tried nose breathing, felt I could not get enough air. Throat incredibly dry. Also before the SP part of the experiment tried to induce a falling sensation. Such as what I experienced as a child. I have been not found the right position yet. During SP portion of experiment tried sinking than rising. Minor subtle hardly noticeable changes. I concluded that Monroe is correct, vibrations are the keys to that particular door. Now I know what they feel like. Can even artificially stimulate (by tensing) my ears.

I was dreaming a strange dream. I was in a vehicle with some lady, traveling a winding road. We stopped. I warned her not to pull ahead further. I had been here before (I felt) and I knew there was a sudden drop off not safe for the car. She |got| (gets) nervous, nearly drives off (the cliff.) I somehow stop it, get the front and push back or something. I watch as the vehicle (car) backs off some rocks embedded in a ground (they were flat on top, sticking about out about a foot or so.) I think the lady is grandma. BC (our straight barn cat) appears and jumps on my lap (BC is skittish and has never jumped on anyone's lap to date.) Then we're in a hospital and grandma is being checked. BC leaves when the doctor enters. We have stopped so we can come here. I move the chair and rip apart an electrical charge cord at the plugged end. Curiously it was connected to my mom's phone and had far too many wires. The doctor examines grandma, I try to get out of the way, squeezing behind her, feeling her tense to move forward. I tell her to stay there, I am fine.

Large gap here. Next thing I know there is some tough guy pulled out or come out of somewhere. A guy whose face was not familiar. A guy who is not easily scared. I feel there is something in the room with me (I am the guy.) I roll from my left side to the floor. I feel up pressure in my upper body, a squeezing, and a definite sense of weight or hands on my back. Before this happened I could feel something moving behind me and to one side. A rollover, fall through the floor, and keep going. My ears pop or tense or something at weird regular intervals, as if (untranslatable.) I pull |ed| through something. Then it stops and I sense I am floating, drifting. But I can't see, it's as if the OBE was interrupted, or perhaps I was projecting but blind. I did not like the pressure, the pushing. I could feel (my left) hand on my chin, cupping it and the other touching the left elbow, pointing down. I recognize a tingling sensation. I was fully conscious and could feel everything I felt when I put my body to sleep.

F.A. (feelings after)
Scared, excited, wary, happy I was able to do what I have been wanting to do but not happy with how it was done (how it happened.)

Had a dream where I finally projected. It affected how I walked and how I felt. I think I did at the dinner table with my family right there. I think I used a twisting motion, like what you feel if you put your arms straight out and spin around. Later I ended up as a cop, a new partner for someone. In another scene to a huge flies were buzzing around me. As I tried it before the window here in Camas I succeeded. I remember really enjoying the feel of separation. I also remember slight worry about the flies and my empty, not dead, body. I also remember a shooting out of my body experience and sensation.

Fragment
More OBE stuff... Some girl, possibly kidnapped, raised as a spy or something. Some man (her brother) trying to help her. Something about 80 being a bad thing for her. Some connection to a haunting or the church. The 80 is a good thing for me. A huge guy brought this thing. The backside of an earlier victim was sticking out of it.

Try PMR (primary muscle relaxation) then "float now" mantra. Realized that I felt the same feelings when I was a kid. I think I actually projected as a child. I can only experience these feelings on my back. I tried to picture my paper above me, where the |untranslatable| (I have a paper above my bed with some text from, "Zen Body Being." I used that as a target.) I found I could increase the feelings and sensations if I simply kept my head and toes in a comfortable angle straight out in front of me. I saw many icons (lucidology reference here) but managed to open none. A landscape opened up to me but I lost it before I realized. No success yet.

A false awakening
2 full dreams
-A wizard and a bush crash
-A snow wolf

False awakening: When it happened I looked at my watch, the time said 7.40am. When I woke up for real the time said 7.15am.

Dream 1: A wizard and a bus crash
I arrived at my village shop to do my paper round, so I collected my papers. Then whilst stood outside of the shop this man recognised me from somewhere and threatened to run me over. He then proceede to get into his car, me being scared I went into the shop to find it filled with people including my brother. Once a few people had left I went outside to find the man had gone. My brother who had followed me outside spotted a can of coke on a bench, he went to pick it up. Suddenly this woman who was smoking a cigarette appeared from around a corner and glared at him in such a horrible way. We then left and started walking back home. On the way back we met up with a few people, one of them was a wizard. We asked him why the woman kept glaring at us and he replied "You must go back in time and save everybody!" Then I appeared on a bus, it was passing through my village but there was no sign of my brother or any of the people I met before. We drove past the large lake in my village and the bus started to lean towards it. Suddenly the bus fell and smacked straight into the ice cold water. The water then started poring into the bus from every angle and I knew this is what the wizard meant. So I started grabbing people and pulling them towards the emergency exit. I couldn't get them out quick enough and the bus was nearly full with water. I looked around and saw a boy about my age running out of air. I swam over and grabbed him, I then motioned for everyone to grab onto each other and I'd pull them up. A few seconds later we broke the surface of the water and then lay on the embankment catching our breath. The boy who I grabbed earlier had swallowed alot of water and was struggling to breath. Two people helped him cough the water back up. On the ground next to the embankment appeared a huge duvet and everybody got underneath to keep warm.
The dream ended here. (Full dream- 1 point)

Dream 2: A snow wolf
I was looking across fields at what appeared to be golden eagles but they were actually coloured golden. Several other people were stood next to me when we saw tigers and wolves come out from the undergrowth at the edge of the field a few metres away. Both the tiger and the wolf closest to me took one look at me. I ran as fast as I could to the nearest tree which I climbed just in time to have a wolves jaws snap shut only centimetres away from my dangling legs. I was in a large willow tree, the one in my garden to be more specific. I was just about to wonder where I was when I slipped and fell a foot closer to the wolf waiting below. Then the branch I was using for support snapped and I fell all the way to the ground landing on my back. I was right I was now in my back garden. I looked to the right to see this huge grey and black wolf standing over me growling. I stayed incredibly still while the wolf sniffed me out, it must have smelt or seen that I meant no harm because it started to lose interest. I moved my hand up and stroked its furry neck, then I got up and walked to my house and the wolf followed behind me. We both went into my room where there was a blond girl waiting who looked about 14 years old, was about half a head shorter than me and was wearing a red top and jeans. (I have discussed this with FelicityPotter and we think it could have been her, unfortunately I wasn't lucid to check.) I started writing things down on paperand glanced to my right to see the wolf looking inquisitivly at me. It was then I noticed it had the nose of a pig but with a third nasal passage. I looked over to the girl who was now on my bed, then I spotted some movement behind my bedroom blinds. It was my mum watching me and making sure I wasn't doing anything I shouldn't be. Then a few minutes later my brother did the same thing and it really annoyed me.
The dream ended here. (Full dream- 1 point)

(Total: 2 points)

I used the Brain Waves Mind Voyages Astral Pprojection guided audio recording today. (ASTRAL TRANCE CD: OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCES- ASTRAL PROJECTION CD) I laid on my back with a pillow under my knees. I can feel my body go to sleep, even my face was partially paralyzed. Towards the end I could feel at another body inside me. It was firmly attached to my physical body, I could not break free. As I slid the inner body to the side, my entire paralyzed physical body was pulled with it. As I tried to transfer my view to the side of my bed, tried to be there at the side of my bed, my body was pulled towards that direction. Same thing when I tried this from the light bulb (I tried to put myself inside the light bulb, to project my consciousness there.) My body was pulled up and to the side. I could not separate. But I could feel the other bodies legs, and arms, even duplicated and muscle twitched in the physical body and the other body. I could feel the twitch happening inside the limb, the physical limb, but the limb itself experienced no twitch. I could also see in my mind's eye of the other body. I could also see a black square to my upper left with my eyes closed. This seemed important. Next attempt I will use a blindfold or darken the room.

I can't remember many dreams tonight I did the "hold close the right nostril" thing and tried to WILD in as I fell asleep.

I end up in something like my room. There's this picture, black with something like a partial, dim moon superimposed over it. I hear words, something like, "no lucidity, partial lucidity, lucidity." At "no lucidity" the image is black. At "full lucidity" you see the partial dim moon. I recall actually walking past the images, as though they were suspended over my sleeping body, and seeing an seeing them in layers. I also saw my body, just a shape in the darkness.

I guess I fell asleep, then there was this rushing, sinking sensation after I saw the partial moon. I felt myself sitting down and rushed out of my own body at the realization I was lucid. Then a strange thing happened. I feel my real right physical eye literally pop open, just before I'm about to leave the room and go exploring. I remember wondering, "why, if I'm lucid, aren't things more detailed?"

Now I still feel as if I'm sinking, I feel my whole body vibrates, and I hear a noise, something like a shrill whistling tea kettle and a large car driving slowly by. The noise fades. I open my eyes, thinking I had WILDed it without knowing it. I lay perfectly still. I was sure that I was in sleep paralysis. But I found I could move around. I swallowed, not really a reflex (my mouth was dry) and decided to wake up to write this.

I can't remember any other dreams, and it seems like this is so the single dream is emphasized. I get the feeling it's extremely important, that being told something, instructed or taught in some way, here.

The moon felt like the first time I recognized a dream sign and gained lucidity. It felt like a Dream Sign which I have never used or set aside as a Dream Sign before, also as if someone was giving me a Dream Sign I never had before. It also feels like a process, the process of gaining lucidity. Like a literal symbol of the process.

Finally I feel as if this is something I should share for some reason.

Body Hopping - 9-10 a.m.
So I drift in and out of semi-lucidity here while trying WILD. I started simply in the body of someone. I remember their hands opening doors and how weird it felt.

(During this or later) |First| I am at a party. I'm here with some friends, but they are in disguises. I burn the top half of my dress (I guess it's a blouse) a long with their disguises. I feel a vicious sort of revenge here. I wearing any red dress with a low top. I think I have long raven black or brown hair. I want to look prettier than them for once. I realize I'm in a female's body and looked down to see my breasts, and a send my senses down to feel the absence of my male parts. I'm seeing things through the eyes of the girl, and when I realize I'm dreaming I end up (or maybe I was already in the process of body hopping) Anyhow I end up in the body of what I assume to be a little boy. It's a night in the city and I'm running to the minivan. For some reason I take note of the people in the front seats. I think I see two men. Another boy my brother, is in the seat behind the driver. We drive straight through some trash in an alley. I still remember how strange it felt for me to run with my tiny legs.

I never tried to control any of these dreams I just sat back and watched. Noise disturbances were constantly disturbing me.

This is one of the few rare times I will share personal experiences. I am doing this here to answer the inevitable question some may have in the back of their mind that asks, "Why is he like this?" Here then is a glimpse into some of what I experienced as a child, which I hope will answer that question.

There are two things I experienced as a child, that, during my reading on the subject only this year, have lead me to believe I did have Out of Body experiences as I was growing up. If this is true it also supports the idea William Buhlman (as I recall) presented, stating children experience this a lot, and for most it goes away as they become adults.

The first thing I experienced quite often, which for some reason I can not induce now, was a feeling of falling. As I recall I could position my head a certain way and feel like I was falling. Sometimes it happened right after I settled down to sleep - no positioning required. I would go to sleep with that feeling.

The second was I am sure a visit to the spiritual realm. I found myself in a cardboard tomato box, floating or being carried through the closet. Inside it was darkness and flames. I believe this experience scared me, and that fear is one of the obstacles I will have to overcome.

I was raised by strict Christian parents, my mom, when I was 12, led me to the Lord. It was never really my choice. It just seemed the right thing to do at the time. Later my mom told me she was going to, or she had, send or sent me a dream concerning the second coming. I had a nightmare where I walked outside the trailer where we lived. It was foggy and gray out. I think there were screams all around. I saw an arm lying on the ground. I think I saw other pieces too. This fear has stayed with me all my life. I don't want to be left behind. I don't want to go to Hell. It is a prison I have so far been unable to escape from.

I experienced other things as a child growing up on that same property. I woke up to find laughing demon faces floating on my wall in broad daylight. I saw a floating face, of an unearthly green color, floating up outside my window, slowly, from the bottom. I was wide awake - not even in bed yet. I could hear my brother and my father in the bathroom next door. I can not describe the face, but I have to sleep with the windows covered even today. This experience left deep psychological scars. I saw a black dog on a trail leading from our house through a strip of woods to a field. As I recall I shone a flashlight on it. The light went through it. The shape in a thick black mist was of a dog, lean and tall, at least 4 feet high, with glowing red eyes. After I shone the light on it the black dog merely turned away and walked into the woods. My stuffed toy rabbit I always slept with turned its head 180 degrees to look at me as I was going to sleep with glowing red eyes. I saw a man, dirty, dressed in denim several times. No record of any such person living in the area. I saw a cat, beheaded, a bloody axe still through it, on a stump with another cat carcass nearby in a gravel pit across from our property. I saw a car from the 60's drive past in the road next to the field. I saw the headlights, but heard no engine and saw no taillights when it passed. It just disappeared. I frequently felt watched and was even followed by something pacing alongside me in the woods.

Now in recent years I have gone from being angry at God for various reasons, to forgiving Him, to questioning the validity of the Bible, to feeling chained and bound to my faith. I have come to feel that there is too much left out, that the thousands of people exploring the afterlife and giving us a glimpse of the spiritual realm can't all be hallucinating, lying, or be simply deceived. I can't believe that Satan could create such a place, I can't believe God, through His Son, would interact with any place Satan created if he did, and I can't believe it is some intricate illusion either. In my opinion Satan, being destructive in nature, could not create anything, and even if he did he would simply destroy it because that is who he is.

So that about sums it up for the my background and childhood, and this sets the stage for the entries of my Out of Body Experiments.