memorable

I'm only few days away from "perfect" recall for a whole month - first time in my three-year career as a lucid dreamer. Perfect, as in I've remembered something for every night/day for a month (my sleeping times have varied). That said, overall I haven't recalled that much. Last night I recalled only a short fragment. Barren streak still continues lucid-wise. 35 days since last lucid now. Let's do another shorty from the the past:

Hostage of Vladimir Putin
Date: September 17th, 2009
Lucid: No

This was a scary and very real-like nightmare. I was in some kind of school and all the sudden Vladimir Putin walks in with some agents. We were taken as hostage. Putin said, that he'll ask each of us a question, and if the answer doesn't please him... bullet into the head. Putin pointed his gun at me couple of times, but didn't ask a question. I remember how my sweat was dripping and how I was terrified. There was a very real fear of death. There was some agent, apparently american or of other enemy of Russia, next to me. Putin asked him that why would he risk his life as there was no chance that he could influence the power struggle between the big countries.

Luckily this dream wasn't very long. The agent next to me didn't even answer, before the pressure got too much for me and I woke up. Not much of reading perhaps once again, but that dream left a permanent mark into my mind.

I was on a road at night. I was passing a lot of houses. I stop in front of a building which was something between an abandon train station and a (abandon) school. There was a man there I believe was claiming to be a janitor..since its the only job he could get because of a past that he had been charged with crimes he didn't do. I believed that story at first. I went into the station-school since he let me in to get warm. The inside of the station looks like a school there was a desks,etc and there was a VCR player and TV too. The guy turned on the TV and the VCR and a video started playing.. "My Crimes" and it showed me all the crimes he done.. I was thinking "Why is the guy showing me this?" I even asked why he was showing me it. He said something like "Because you wouldn't be leaving here alive." and when he was talking he had been putting a knife to my throat.I did get really scared at that moment. At that moment there was a sound at the (outside) door and he pushed me into a closet and locked me in there.

dream changed:
I was a man (in RLF I'm a woman), I was travelling with one other man, and a blond woman (I'm a red-head in RLF).We were all sharing an aparment when travelling and the other man was already at the table eatting cereal. I had just sat down to open up the ceral box and when I did..there were too ceral bags.. 1)was a more "healthy" Cearal and the other one was Fruit Loops.

scene changes..
I'm in the bedroom in the same apartment (everything in that apartment is white).. I'm still a man, I'm on a cell (which is something I don't have in RLF), there is a woman's voice on it kept saying "Its me Emma". I had no clue who "Emma" was/is. The next thing I know I'm watching a news item and it said something about a shoot out around the apartment building we're in. (It had a red outside and non-fire escape stairs to the ground).

Second Earth

This one was really cloudy. It started out and we were on a different planet but thing thing was it was pretty much identifiable to Earth. The part of the planet that we were on was a mountainous lush green grass covered, treeless expanses and we were in the middle of a bowl with some mountains surrounding us. Now the weird thing was that if you looked straight up, you could see the exact same landscape upside down a long ways up above us, kinda like when the girl folds the world over in inception. I was there for some kind of art camp. I remember looking up at the upside down version of where we were, which in the dream was supposed to be the original earth which meant that we were on some replica earth that was literally floating less than a mile over head with the exact same environments.

Like this but without the water. and an identical place from "Original Earth" hanging upside down above us.

The most beautiful thing that captured my attention while loo was that birds were not subject to gravity. There were flocks of black birds that would fly in between the two worlds constantly and it was one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. I stared for so long.

At one point I had to get some kind of art supply for my teacher...also my friends were there (frankie and them) and we were all sitting at several wooden picnic tables scattered around the landscape. SO now I had to go get the art supplies. There was one part of the landscape that wasn't pretty and that was an old rusty building that looked like something out of biohazard. A replica of this was not on original earth. I climbed up a ladder and entered the place. The inside looked like a warm and cozy house on the slightly high price range. I took out my knife and held in reverse in my right hand. I didn't forget that I was on a strange land and that there could be aliens. For some reason I was very convinced that I was gonna run into an alien cat monster. I was walking through the place carefully, and I saw a giant swiss army pocket knife that I wanted to steal but didn't. I kept walking and passed some humans so I let down my guard a lot. They were sitting on a couch watching tv and chilling out. I kept walking through when I saw another one of those knives. I picked it up and a kid who saw me said that it was somebodies. I said that it was alright and I'll just get the other knife that I found a while ago. He smiled maliciously and told me that if there was another knife than the one I was holding should go to him and that I should get the other knife. I smiled and accepted this deal. After I gave him the knife, I wandered back with him following me to the couch area. I think the couch was now more of a love seat configuration and that there were 2 of my friends, both girls (mad mod and sarah h) I sat down and started watching tv with them. There was some strange music on and we were watching a sonic the hedgehog-esque character and I started scatting a melody over the boring music in the background. I made a grand show of it and was kind of looking for a compliment. Never got it.

I was in my room I think. I dont really remember what triggered me to RC, but I did. I was lucid. I can't remember all that I did here. Although, I do remember Sam following me, saying that she was lucid as well. I walked into my closet with her at my tail, and found a book wide open. I tried to read from it just to see if I could, but every time my eyes moved every word turned to something else. I remember reading weird words like "rime", or something like that. Sam walked away for a moment, and now was my chance. I think instead of flying straight out of my bedroom window, I broke it with my foot, then jumped out face first. I glided slowly downwards to the ground. Looking up, I noticed that it was barely twilight.
Once I landed, I saw what looked like a shack with lighted torches around it at the end of my driveway. It was pretty odd. I tried to fly again, so I started hovering instead. I closed my eyes and imagined myself hovering. I got a few inches above ground. I noticed it wouldn't work if I concentrated on the whole body, so I tried different parts instead. I focused on my calf, and I started
hovering a bit more up and moving really fast to the left. I stopped that and tried to run really fast, but I only ran a little more than I could in the real world. It made me very tired for some reason.
Somehow I got back inside my house, and was at the base of the stairs. I looked in front of me on the right wall and saw a beautiful picture. It looked like a blue cabin in the woods, with the morning sun illuminating the lake beside it. I wanted to go there. I stuck my hand into the wall. It was pretty hard at first. Then I stuck another hand in, then my nose. I couldn't really get through any further.
So, I gave up and walked back up the stairs. I walked into my room and was thinking of some tasks I could achieve. I thought of the 3 step tasks, and
decided I would do them. First I RCed, then I tried to stabilize. I rubbed my hands together, but nothing really changed. It just looked like little rivulets were swirling in my sight. So I tried to touch things, and the dream became much more vivid and real. But just a little bit. Then I flew out my window once more.
That's all I remember. I'm not good at remembering the beginning and end parts of my lucid dreams.

Used some Maca and B-vitamins after waking last night, and felt like "just weird" Maca is good for energy and stamina, not a stimulating kind like caffeine, but more of a conscious awareness, and apparently also Libido, tho I never noticed that. Anyway on with my dream: I slipped into a dream, rather easily last night after going back to bed for a wild. The dream began with me in a dark room, where a mirror was by my bed, A mysterious voice said you have used it before, haven't you? I said I used it to turn into an animal. The voice said how did it feel, realistic? I said yes, and that it made me feel free. The voice said how so? I said it opened up my mind to odd ideas not possible, in waking life. The voice said what is waking life?! And I suddenly was in sleep paralysis. Strong electricity, buzzing, and total oblivion. While fighting it, this same voice said it's going to change your life, fight it off and it will set you free. The buzzing subsides and I just know I beat it back to a dream. The same voice said welcome back to the dreamworld. At this point I said what's going to change my life? Voice: That you remembered. I was like wow, this is one incredibly vivid conversation for a DC, so I asked who are you? My dream name is Silver Ghost, but I am also you. I have a dream name? Yes. Do others know this name? Yes. (Goggled it after the dream, and got a 1906 car) After that the voice said look at the mirror, and change. I changed into the same Fox-like animal that I have done a few time's before, only this time was way more vivid with white fur. "Now run around someone's dream your connected to. You don't know them but do whatever you want" is the last thing the voice said. I left my house and was in apparently someone's dream. I think it was just my own dream, but I'm open to anything, really. There a woman said look at that dream character, hey wolf are you a wolf? I said I don't think so. Are you dreaming too? I said. She looked at me sexually, and this wearied me out. Are you real doggie? Want to play a dream game? I asked what that was and she said A Transformation? How did you do it, in my dream? So I approach her and she pets my hair, winks at me and I woke up. So complex by far my longest most comprehensive conversation and totally meaningful.

I am 24 years old now. I used to live in a mobile home when I was about 3. I ended up accidentally burning that trailer to the ground. Around the time I was 5 years old, I had a dream where I was in the mobile home that I burnt down. The interior walls of the mobile home looked like they had been burnt out. Part of the time I was looking at the mobile home from the air and there was NOTHING but the trailer. Jason, from the horror movies Friday the 13th, was chasing me around the house with a chainsaw in his hands while I ran away. That is all that I remember.

I was on the bank of a river and I had just gotten off a boat. I was trying to drive my car onto a boat dock, but the man working at the dock wouldn't let me. I then found myself walking the opposite way up the bank of the river. I came upon a tree and then I saw an African American male ghost wearing a plaid shirt and he had no legs. He was flying back and forth above the water and was explaining to me how ghosts can be killed. I remember him pointing to the crown of his skull on the left side of his head and he said something like, "This is the only spot you can hit a ghost on the head and kill them". That is all that I remember from that dream.

I was walking through gardened, sunlit streets of Paris while servants rushed past me carrying flowers and lanterns. Suddenly, I realized I was dreaming. I hadn't done a reality check - the environment was simply unfamiliar and felt dreamlike. Knowing I was lucid, I tried to collect my thoughts and spun a few times to stay asleep. Because I'd been having with dream control, I decided to start by truly flying rather than the sad floating I'd been doing in lucid dreams lately.

Still in Paris, I flung myself off of a balcony and began to fly. The flying was fantastic - very fast and soaring, yet completely under control. The cities and towns of France were beautiful but also looked rendered, like a video game. I remember thinking that there were no landmarks like the Eiffel Tower, because this was Paris in the early seventeenth century.

I noted at this point that I was flying in a kind of standing position, with my legs pointed down and head vertical. I wondered if flying on my stomach may be a better experience and tried it. However, it felt just like the hand gliding I do in the real world, and my visibility wasn't as good. I went back to flying while standing.

As I was flying around, I noticed a ship that had partially sunk like the Costa Concordia in Italy. I thought hey, it's a lucid dream, I'll fly down and save the ship. However, I was unable to turn it over, and was gored and bloodied in the process with skin ripped off my body. This wasn't painful or scary, though, because I was still lucid. I figured I hadn't "assumed" I could help the boat, and therefore couldn't.

After flying a bit more, I decided to try going to the moon. I became a space shuttle, and rockets blasted below me, propelling me skywards. I landed on the moon and became a person again, exploring a partially unbuilt lunar base with other humans. After that, I flew more, and remember explaining to a dream character that the reason I was spinning in place was to stay asleep. My alarm clock eventually woke me up.

Note: Went to bed drunk

Well, as any of my readers might already know, I don't really have lucid dreams. My dreams are more like that of memory fragments that are very realistic, and slightly terrifying at times.
My point is this: A week or two a friend of mine suggested that I try lucid dreaming to counteract some haunting nightmares I'd been having. I did some research on the subject of dreaming lucidly and found out the basic beginner's trick to knowing when you're in a lucid dream.
I had kind of gotten the idea from Inception, but regardless, it works ALMOST every time.
People would often say for beginners to think of a bright, easily recognizable object. After seeing that object appear you would know you're now in a lucid dream. At first I tried to think of something like, a neon green dodge ball, or fiery puppy, but nothing seemed to work, but then I watched Inception. They used small inanimate objects like a chess piece or a small top, well I then tried that the following night, and it worked!
I'm not going to say what the object (because it's very personal and I don't think the objects original bearer would appreciate me just telling everyone on the internet what object kept us such good friends).
Once I was lucid, I think it would be safe to say that all hell broke loose in my subconscious mind. At first I just got out of bed like i had woken up in the middle of the night. It was so real I was afraid I was actually awake! To safely test my theory out, I punched my brother in the face. Instead of waking up, his entire head was dismembered and the things inside it spread all over the wall.
I felt so amazing, so I shot a blast of fire at the wall and flew out after my large, white Angel wings had sprouted from my back.
I was drawn to my school for some reason, so I smashed a whole in the ceiling and landed in the cafeteria. It was dark except for a few candles here and there. In the middle of the room was one of my good friends, uh, Rayne. Before I continue I should mention that she is a very well behaved teenage girl, who would never do anything bad past... okay, at the moment I can't think of anything bad she would do, but anyways...
She was laying in the middle of the room with a syringe in her arm. I rush over to her and hold her up due to the fact that she didn't eve look like she was breathing. I pick her up and she begins laughing like a maniac.
She holds up another syringe in my face. "Dude," she says tiredly. "You should... totally, try this stuff!"
'What the hell is it?!" I asked concernedly.
"HEROINE!!"
Then I realized I was in a dream and I pulled a Daedric Dagger out of nowhere and stabbed my leg. The next thing I know I wake up screaming, because I was pinched my leg so hard that I started to ooze blood.
Anyways, that was my first successful attempt at lucid dreaming. Hopefully in the future I will try to have longer and more intense dreams. I'll also being doing some research in shared dreams and will attempt one of those.
Dekaron, signing off!

Last night's recall... Meh, at least I took notes. Still not much stuff. Let's go back to the past again - it's always funny to notice how your dreams haven't really changed that much and finding connecting themes between your current and three years ago dreamed dreams. Still, I'm so tired that I'm going to do a super short one.

Voice in the Darkness
Date: August 28th, 2009
Lucid: No

I was going outside. It was a winter night and it was very dark outside. Weird that the seasons are so often not consistent in dreams - I mean that this was dreamed in August, yet it was the darkest time of the winter in the dream.

Only light-source outside was the light that came from the inside. As the door closed before me, darkness engulfed me. I was alone in the darkness. I felt distressed. Voice from the dark said: "Well well, Jakro came out." It had an evil tone and I got terrified.

Something grabbed me and started dragging me away. I started screaming as hard as I can, hoping that someone would hear me and come to help. The voice just told me to shut up. I still didn't see anything.

My own screams woke me up in the bed. I wrote to my dream journal that "I had planned to try a FILD if I wake up in the night, but I was too terrified to do it."

Simple, yet intense dream. I had some serious emotional problems back then. Well, I guess I still have.

"The Spacefairy Porthole"
Dec 21 2006 when I first started keeping a dream journal, this one is very memorable.

It starts off I am in a spaceship and I'm recieving instructions on how to run the controls by this older man. He's kind of like a tour guide giving instructions to a bunch of newcomers on the spaceship. He's giving a speech to all of the "tourists" of the ship. I'm supposed to read the instructions but I decide to put that off and explore the spaceship even though I was given some assignment...after I promise to read I put them aside. Up ahead is a giant glass window where we can view where the spaceship is going. I am astounded at the magnificant view that the window gives. I walk up to the glass and I'm closer than anyone, suddently a beautiful giant blue whale bumps into the glass, the tourguide comments "Oh that's just some occasional debree we get here and then" the whale is beautiful, and is swimming through space. When no one is looking I decide to head off through one of the doors and explore.

I go down a neverending hallway, which at one point I see my family but they're in line for a movie, even though there is nobody else in line and they're not actually...going anywhere. I try to tell my father this, that there is no line- but he is convinced that he has to wait in line therefore convincing my family this and I have to leave them there to their own doom. I continue through this strange hallway which is sort of interdimensional until I come to the library. I enter into what is the most beautiful library I have ever seen, with white floors and white walls and white marble everywhere. There are millions and millions of books, but I am caught off gaurd again when I see what is a beautiful marble mantlepiece. I walk towards the mantlepiece, Suddenly a beauitful fairy appears with curly brown hair and a beautiful dress- all I remember is she was so beautiful and made a twinkling noise. Suddenly her bare feet are enmeshed in leaves, and a sort of wreath of roots and leaves forms directly in front of her.

She tells me to look, and I look into the wreath and can see in it. Then she directs me to "Jump!" Meaning jump into this wreath where there is a hole- like a porthole. I look in and then I jump into it- I am in for three seconds, which seem to be for a millenium, as you go through time slows. I am falling down through- kind of like Alice's rabbit hole, I see these giant rocks and formations and I guess like those ancient ruins, these rocks are floating in a beautiful heavenly space, there is grass and moss and different planes of grass. It's bright I first land on a floating island, all around is sort of a grey starry mist, but as I pass through- it is as if a glimpse is more than ten minutes...there are whales floating around everywhere, beautiful large whales and floating stones... I stay here for awhile and then I jump off and continue through the hole until I land face down in a pyramid.

Here I am a slave, I have to move these certain rocks around and a woman is the queen, a cruel evil woman who has a whip and a gun. There are certain levels in the inside of this pyramid. On the top are two chairs- for the queen and king, then it slopes downward to where the common people go and then there is a sort of cliff, where you cant see the slaves working on the bottom level. We're all in a line and we're working on these ropes...or something. The queen, rarely goes down the steps to where the slaves are. My friends who are next to me decide to escape, they pull a stone out of the cliff and find a passageway into another place where they go in all first before me. I try to follow but my hips get stuck. They escape..

Then the queen comes down. She sees that I haven't been working constantly and comes towards me with her gun and whip in hand. I close my eyes and tuck my knees to my chest while she circles around me knowing that at any moment she might shoot me- she taunts me and makes fun of this moment. Then suddenly I jump up and grab the gun. I run to the right where there is a gaurd and I shoot him in the arm. then I continue running. I continue along the hall and yet again I see my father- but just my father- I tell him that he has to run because there's someone after me. I want his protection but he demands that he is in line and has to wait- this is in a sort of grey carpeted realm and he is standing in front of a door to a kind of black void. So I ignore him .

I continue running and can hear the queen behind me, she is close and I see a door and I pray to myself that it is the library. I run to the door and open and then I slam it before the queen catches up. Yet I know she could come in soon, so I have to hurry, I discard everything and search and search until I find that magical fireplace mantle where I know she appeared. I pray and pray, APPEAR APPEAR! then instead of the fairy- the magic porthole appears. I jump in quickly and find myself BACK in the spaceship. There i am holding the instructions. I think to myself that I could live here but the only place I'll ever be happy is my home. ....I keep thinking about home and then the hole appears I jump into it and I wake up with a start in my bed. I get up and go to the bathroom and look in the mirror, for a few moments I dont remember anything= and then it hits me- I remember the whole dream.

"Time Warp" Jan 1st 2012

There was a knock at Ryan's door. I went outside then i heard myself from inside the house. I hid then realized I could zip away or time travel. I figured out how to astral project myself into other dimensions. This was key to the next epic dream which was like living another life. When I was aware of this I committed your to dream memory, it was in the future. Beyond 2012 and my brother was going to be trapped in a time warp so I had to save him. I used my special powers to become invisible and I ap'd across a road covered in ice that sensed or human energy. They could not sense me unless I was in front of them and touching the ice. These men in yellow astronaut like suits with helmets etc. they may have thought I was an alien because I was invisible or maybe they knew who I was.

There was a huge collapse of a football stadium just like a movie. That may have been earlier, then there was an attack like an unseen force of destruction. Aliens? I remember how I used the cellphone as w a way to warp, but I'm not sure if those were tapped.

I think I may have been caught or rode in a "police" vehicle. They drove hover cars that were Circular with rubber legs or something and could sense life. The whole area was dead and humanity was being wiped out like in a time warp and controlled or I fear channeled to other bodies ?


"Glitch" Feb. 9 2009

Last Night: I am in bed, and then I am being awakened. I am conscious and choose my escape method. I feel the force of spinning in my body, and slip out then the Shadow begins poking me::In the ribs, back, thigh, stomach, arms, anywhere it hurts me and I continue avoiding the pain and knowing I cannot just 'let' it torture me because it obviously 'wants' me to struggle, so masochistic. I know there are four anonymous demon names which I am not aware of, although I know there are four demon names before me....and I am then suddenly under my bed on the floor- I feel the cold wooden floor against my skin and I am laying with my side and face on the floor, I am UNDER the bed...it was so real and terrifying....the poking and pinching begins again and I begin calling out 'Aaaah Aahh' sometimes I can hear it, and it's like I am moaning through the parallel astral dimensions. I wake up and think, although that was horrible I think I can experience worse....

The Night Before: I am once again boarding the plane and then the plane takes off, then I am waiting to board, then I am traveling in air, next to people. There are companions. It's just non-stop boarding then getting off...and then on. I am climbing through a tall building that is never-ending with secret rooms- this large building is a metaphor for a Magical Asylum. It has rooms for memories of people that passed and people being born. My mother has a room with paintings of her children and who she wanted us to be....

The Magical Asylum and The Airplane metaphor is a dream I have been having almost nightly, getting on a plane and traveling...and then this stupid crazy Magical Asylum in a dark city at night. I am trapped, it's like a life or death...like they are trying to make us Immortal and crazy or something and I keep trying to escape and make friends with the patients then like, I escape and become a con artist or I steal things from the Asylum....or tell their secrets like a spy it's very fun those dreams but the neverending rooms like dreams are overwhelming and make me dizzy. I also have dreams about boarding schools, of course, magical boarding schools with a Witch as the Headmistress and yeah...those dreams are hard to remember when I wake up.

"Little Brother" DEC 14 2010

My recent dream was very different than usual dreams. I was with my younger brother, who is usually very mature and articulate. In this dream it was like he was a really young boy, like nine or so, and kind of vulnerable. His vulnerability just showed. I was with him on the shore with a crowd of people, once again it was in a tropical climate and then I told some people, maybe parents or caretakers that we were venturing toward the shore to see the waves. I was with him, and suddenly the waves rushed in and people were panicking. I quickly took control and became the mother of my brother, I told him to hurry back from the water just before it started to flood. Then this person, I think it was my dad character, said to take my brother and flee because it was crowded, and we needed to get away before the floods got to us. We were walking along the road in the dark. The further we moved away from the sea the more I became the mother. But then, suddenly I became possessive. I had him in really nice clothes and he was with me, but everything was up to my "vision" of him and how much I loved him, while putting my interests first. I remember I took him with me, and him being kind of incoherently innocent, smiled as we enjoyed a rich people's party. I was dressed in designer clothes and acting wealthy and superior.

And i wanted him to look wealthy to project both of our worth. I've never been this way in real life but it made me analyze the issue of parenthood and possessiveness. Also, I think the ocean may have an emotional level for how much I care about my brother...and with my mom not being stable right now I do feel protective of him while not feeling like I can truly protect him. And with my mom sick, it's even harder. He's becoming an adult, so this is even stranger to me that I should dream of him being so little. Of course, the worst part was I think during the end my self got so consumed in escapism that I lost sight of him and ended up in my own world and he was left behind. I don't know, I never cared about someone as much as my brother. I know he cares about me a lot too, and it's hard to express how much you love someone when it's family sometimes, because you're with them all the time. I still live at home aside from college, and he's going to college next year.

Overall it was a really deep and revealing dream, but on so many levels the part about me in this over-protective possessive role while it seemed to feel good as the "mother" I retrospectively think of it as entirely wrong. I have wondered sometimes if my mother became this way too...or if it's common under stress or normal circumstances. I also think I've always wanted him to think of me as a role model, and I've felt I let him down sometimes. Feeling like I want to protect my younger brother, as I always have, it's tough when he's growing up and I worry about him. He's so rebellious and craving independence, and I'm just someone who cares about him. But deep down, isn't caring better than being protective? Even if that boy in the dream wasn't like him, I've had another dream that scared me to the core. I called my brother and his voice was creepily childish and confused, and my first thought was "he's in trouble, it's not him"

I wonder sometimes, it's like I have all these dreams of his childhood self when I was struggling, images of him crying when I looked into a mirror at my face, I see his face instead. What are my dreams telling me? That I need to be a better sister?

"Gangsta" 2009
I remember it much like snapshots of different moments. In the beginning I was on a mission. Then I was watching a video that was made for me by two men, who were dressed in dark hoodies. It was them talking about how they loved me, but I wasn't sure I should love them because they were gangsters. Then I was at a young man's house, who trying to get me alcohol and to drink alcohol despite I was talking to my dad, who was laying on the couch dreaming. I remember the government found out I did something illegal, maybe I fell in love. Then I was in a garage type place and this rich man who traveled a lot said he had been looking for me, and that I couldn't get away from him. He started firing at me and I dodged all the bullets then I ran, and I got on a train and ended up where no one could find me, not even my family. I was walking through a downtown area in a black coat looking up at the architecture, there was probably a fountain and it was fall or winter. I had a feeling I would meet someone, that I would still fulfill my mission despite that I had left everything behind, it was a new life.

"Ascension" 2009 October

I am on a subway. The train screeches. I'm with people, we're underground. I make it to the bottom, there must've been an elevator. I take the stairs to the top. I'm in my house, a man is with me on the porch who tries to attack me. Then he shifts and evolves into a friend. He wanted to tell me the secret truth.
I'm in a spaceship with horrible people doing horrible things to me. I keep coming back to a 'game' where I'm a baby being fed bad food and sung aweful lullabies to grow into a slave. I write a letter to the heavens, and tell them what I know of this. That I don't understand why I am being put through the game and what I truly want. I'm with two people, a man and a woman. The man thinks I'm his slave. The man tells me something, the woman is suspending herself. I make a better impression on them, the man thinks he is like God?
I'm in a space station type place. There's a sick boy with me. I've been given pills in the shape of the solar system. A nurse comes into my bedroom and I feel upset about this. A girl is sitting in my bed and she is talking about the aliens. I tell her they are real, it's just a matter of perspective. I see a tirangle spaceship and think about another dream about the triangle spaceship, desert, and mars.

I'm on a huge spaceship and we're looking out into space. A chinese man and a wise scientist. One of them throws open the space door. They hold onto the sides, 'what are you doing?' a man asks. He says 'I'm liberating them'. We decide to let go and are sucked into the stars then spit out on the otherside. But it's not what the boy thought it would be. He reminds me of someone. Then I'm hovering above a spaceship that's on a planet, and it's making 'spew spew spew' noises and I hear a rock music song.
I am strong when I face the attacker, I wrestle him and my dad yells at him 'what are you doing?' he says I came to tell her the truth. There was a contract you signed that you werent meant to into slavery. The system brought him there. Then he realized he was supposed to be my friend and became nice. So much happened within this and it was all so vivid and surreal, like the most craziest dream I've ever had. It may have flowed in sequence but not when I woke up. It was definitely centered around ascension.

This dream was interesting and futuristic like many of my dreams. I plan on posting my most memorable ones periodically.

March 29, 2011

"All you need is a foreign tour guide, and this guide will take you through the map of dreams--to any parallel earth in time."

We were in a room I had been before, fleeting glimpses of past and future swirled around with magical glimpses of surreal and primal wants.

I walked along a city, there were tall highways that reached up into the sky.

I entered this large building in France. Perhaps in Paris, France. "How did you get in here?" Someone asked me. I told them I had a tour guide.

The place was a giant museum...basically, an empty chamber with towering walls of black marble, etched into the marble was locations, names, identities. Something about it was mystical, mythical, unsettling. They were busy, people rushed through but I was in awe of the names. I knew I had to look at them. They looked like the names of vets of a war too, like in DC.

There was more, but I don't remember it all.

Then I had an intensely sexual run in with someone, that stayed with me.

So this girl asked me how I got there, and I told her because I couldn't help it I was so excited...she was younger, and she asked how she could get a foreign tour guide so she could travel between realms as well.

The oddest thing about the dream was that I had a gut feeling I was dreaming. But what made me mad to them was that I thought it was a dream! This happens a lot in my dreams, dream people think I'm crazy when I realize or tell them I'm dreaming. I didn't tell anyone it was a dream, but I knew.

Then I heard, finally, "That's it. We're going in and getting her out." She sounded and looked like Hillary Clinton.

Suddenly I was pulled like through a tunnel, I saw men in black and they started chasing me. I jumped and had a fleeting glimpse of the room and bed as if it was just another fleeting dream. Then I woke up with a jolt realizing, wait--no this was my true reality.

I can only describe this in limited detail, if I could make a movie of those fleeting glimpses with a good budget---it would be awe inspiring. My dreams are like films, lucid, colorful full of light and beauty as well as sound and motion.

Jan 3 2011

I wondered exactly how I got there. It felt there was a surreal fog sweeping over me, choking me with terror. I watched the planes soaring high, then crashing down into oblivion. People poured into buses, evacuating the city like good citizens that they were. But I was not about to be shuttled to another cage. I was not one of them.

I had already been running, as far as I could in my drug induced panic, from the police. I had been running because I had caused another disturbance. In some ways, I felt the explosion had been my fault. The fear gripped my lungs, and I coughed at the gaseous smoky stench. How the hell was I going to outlive this one?

For one split second, I had been running from the scene. In another terrorizing second, the escape had been replaced by instinctual panic. I knew they were coming for me. I wasn't exactly sure what I had done this time. I believe it had something to do with unloading my rifle into the oppressor's stomach. The man Jimmy, my dealer, who had tried to beat me to a pulp and laced me with something from some new age drug.

The crazy stuff was starting to affect my judgment. That and the explosions that were blowing our city to a crisp. One corporate chain, one house with three children, one ghetto crack house, all the same fate. Yes, and in some way it felt comforting to me. To feel as though people were partaking in the terror I had always felt. The doom of mankind. The depression of a non-existent God to save us all.

Stopping for a second I clutched my heart, feeling it pounding with excitement and fear. There was no where else to go. I was on someone's property, but would they care now that we were brethren again? That I was a crook and a cheat would escape them. I ran to the cellar and tore it open. The wind and dust suddenly replaced by dark ebbing silence.

In the cellar it was very dark and dismal. It wreaked of plant foliage and flesh. It was as if I had stumbled into a Jurassic park of sorts. Making my way through the garbage, I stumbled over a table with specimens in bottles. Did I have my lighter? I hoped so, fishing through my pockets. I swore under my breath with relief. I had my butane lighter; thank god! When I flicked the torch on, I was taken aghast by what I saw.

The specimens were foreign to me. It seemed as though this was the home of some wacky scientist. But the specimens were not what really took my breath away, it was the expanse of the cellar. I wandered off toward something that felt it was pulling me toward it through both fear and curiosity. Suddenly, another explosion went off. I ran toward the blue glimmering, and found myself face to face with an immense aquarium.

There was plant life in the aquarium, and creatures were swimming about that seemed to have been taken from the bottom of the sea. Feeling the awe take over me, I walked toward the stairs and gazed down into the sea life. Another explosion sent me crouching.

"Who are you?" An old man snapped from down below.

"Uh, uh, name's Gerald. I was taking refuse from the bombs."

And so began our friendship, we spent the next 48 hours cooped up in the bomb shelter exchanging interesting stories. But Darren's stories were the most interesting, of course. Darren was once a diver, but the intrigue of sea-life caused him to study marine biology. He began collecting specimens of sea life, and then had experimented on their DNA to create new life forms.

After the attacks were over, Darren asked me to repay him for shelter by giving a blood sample. I couldn't say no, this man was a genius. He told me to close my eyes as he drew blood. I peaked, and to my utter shock realize his motives. Had he wanted to mix human DNA with sea specimen DNA? A completely new life form would be created from my DNA. I knew this...he knew it. It was an unspoken agreement.

But I had no idea that my DNA would cause the worst creatures imaginable. That my true nature was like that of a beast, and my DNA would slowly infect every cell in their mutant bodies. Creating a new form of life that resembled self-replicating trolls. I came back to visit him, and when I went to the cellar I found a million of these short stubby creatures, with large man-eating teeth. One of them was not enough to take me down, but a million? They kept multiplying.

I told him he had to stop. I told him I would not be a part of this. And then one day he simply disappeared off the face of the earth. I got a group of friends together, to try and stop the creatures from ever escaping the cellar...but the trolls were too strong. And so, I guess it was the final vengeance of God to create a new breed of human-like creatures. For now millions of trolls walk the earth, and strange mutant creatures have re-created the world into an inescapable survival game.

I don't want to go into alot of detail, because I don't know how to make this entry private. So I'll put what I can in as vague a way as possible.

Last nights LDs were memorable in several ways, mainly in the technique used to attain lucidity:

1. All 3 were successful DEILDs (which is usually really hard for me, I ordinarily just DILD)
2. All 3 were successful gender swaps
3. In the 3rd one, I didn't lose lucidity too soon, via some old tried and true techniques

First of all, concerning DEILDs, I was on a roll last night. They took little effort, and happened quickly! I went straight from a few moments of hypnogogic images and then boom, lucid. My self-awareness was consistent from being awake, to the images, then the LD. I was so happy, but I kept getting that "feeling tired within the dream, leading to waking up" problem. Even dream blindness one time. I just kept yelling "More Lucidity Pleeeeeease" and it would lock it in for a few moments. One time, I felt that tiredness and was afraid I might wake up, so I did my mirror trick: I lifted my hands and willed a mirror to appear. I looked at my reflection, opened my eyes REALLY WIDE, and they started changing shape and getting all deformed, which locked in the lucidity. But it wasn't until the 3rd LD, that in "that moment", you know, during a naughty LD, where you wake up too soon, I just kept on shouting "More Lucidity" every few seconds. It was a little high maintenance, but I didn't wake up until the deed was complete haha!

HUGE personal triumphs for me. You know folks, I always do better with my LDs when I come back to DV and talk to all you dreamers, discuss techniques.. just, you know, be in the zone. So I give all y'all partial credit Thanks xoxoxo.