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Morning of December 2, 2017. Saturday.



It seems to be afternoon. I am in an unfamiliar restaurant with my mother (July 14, 1916-October 2, 2002) and Marilyn (older half-sister on my mother’s side, April 25, 1942-February 13, 2014). They are facing each other from each side of the booth and closest to the window. I am on Marilyn’s right. I have no memory of their deceased status and no viable link to my current conscious self identity. My dream self seems to be about twenty-five years old (though I am fifty-six in reality). I could assume the location as La Crosse (America), though there is no direct focus or thought about where we are. There is no backstory. (The restaurant scenario indicates mild hunger during sleep.)

My mother wants me to buy a Dutch sandwich for her from the restaurant directly across the street (perceived as west of where we are, which subliminally aligns to the street as west of where I am in bed in reality). Although I already have some money, she gives me about a dollar and fifty cents in small change, which is apparently what one costs. (My mother never said “Dutch sandwich” in real life as far as I know, and I never bought a sandwich for her in real life. Apparently, a Dutch Sandwich is the term for a tax avoidance strategy that some multinational corporations use to lower their corporate tax liability. I have no familiarity with this term.)

I leave the restaurant, but instead of crossing the street, I continue north in an odd state of faux lucidity (with thoughts of finding my wife Zsuzsanna, without remembering who she is, for a lovemaking session). (Faux lucidity is when I might do something I would do in a lucid dream but without being aware that it is a dream. It is different from liminal dream control, apex lucidity, and normal lucidity.)

My dream self falls back into the current scenario of my dream and I decide to buy the sandwich. I cross over to the west side of the street with the intent to walk a block and come back around easterly after walking south for about a block. As I walk along the west side of the street rather than the sidewalk, an unknown Hispanic male walks near the middle of the street to my left. He is carrying an unrealistically long telescope in a case, similar to a tightrope walker using a pole for balance. It seems nearly three-fourths as wide as the street. (There are a few other unfamiliar people walking along to my left.) He accidentally tips it up on the right and bumps the back of my head without realizing it. I do not alert him to this and he walks on ahead.

I enter the other restaurant. I see a large alcove near the entrance (to my right as I walk in). An unknown female is there. She is sitting near a low-set counter (north). It has about nine sandwiches for sale, sparsely arranged. I stand on her left. (Zsuzsanna is sleeping in this orientation in reality, that is, to my right.) I ask if there is a Dutch sandwich here (directed at the cashier behind me on the other side of the room, not this customer). This customer tells me that she has bought and is eating the last one. On the opposite side of the room are two more unknown females who work there and of whom are behind a high-set counter near the cash register. I absentmindedly walk out of the restaurant with the bottom half of one of the other sandwiches without paying for it. Mayonnaise is on it as well as minimal lettuce. I soon realize what I am doing, walk back in, and give it back to the female closest to the cash register. The purchase area is similar to the Coney Island Restaurant in La Crosse I had frequented years ago (and of the same directional orientation), but my dream self does not note this.

She tells me that she will make two Dutch sandwiches that I can buy and starts to make them in an area near shelves (about four tiers) opposite the service counter. The other female (more to my right as I face south) asks me about “feather sticks” and if people generally consider them as “lighter”. I assume she is talking about feather dusters, so I nod in agreement. However, she talks about cooking on a gas stove, which puzzles me. She had apparently said “feather steaks” and was asking whether they are “lighter” when fried using a gas stove rather than (presumably) an electric stove. (“Feather steak” could be considered as a flight symbol, which means that the preconscious is inducing dream state waking symbolism, especially as this is a checkout scenario which symbolizes emergent consciousness activation and my dream’s implied precursory exit point, though my dream self remains unaware of this, likely involving RAS, as it is also similar to “feathered serpent” and with “steak” rhyming with “snake”. A snake is the main biological waking prompt via RAS depending on the dream type and depth of sleep. The reference to “lighter” additionally relates to waking symbolism, hovering, and RAS-related inner ear dynamics that typically biologically manifest the falling sensation upon waking.)

The other female has my sandwiches ready. They are not in any sort of bag and are atop each other (two-tiered construct, symbolizing conscious self identity over fictional dream self identity, which I am vaguely aware of but without a viable trigger). I get out my money to pay for them and see that I am holding several coins (in my left hand) that look more like small disks of sliced salami. I go to give her what I assume to be a dollar coin to start with, but it is apparently only twenty-five cents (as it is about the size of an American quarter). I tell her that I am uncertain of the value of the “coins” because it is not clearly noted on them. (At this point, I have a vague recall of Australian one and two-dollar coins while still puzzling over the variously-sized miniature salami slices as “coins”, though this is not enough to trigger any thread of emergent consciousness despite coins and cash registers at a checkout being a known and very familiar dream state indicator and precursory end marker since childhood.) I decide to get out my wallet and pay with an American five-dollar note. The change I get seems like normal coins, which I put in my right pocket with the “salami coins”. (Getting out my wallet at the checkout is analogous to trying to link to my conscious self identity via my fictional dream self near my dream’s exit point, as an ID is kept in a wallet in real life.)

As I turn to my left to leave (atypical waking orientation, though Zsuzsanna now sleeps on my right for the first time in years), I notice I am not wearing shoes. I am not sure how or when this happened. I soon find and put on my left shoe, which is near the counter under the attached stools. I accidentally put a girl’s shoe, black with a buckle, on my right foot. (This is a childhood dream association when Brenda was a prescient stand-in for Zsuzsanna.) I realize this, yet accidentally put on a different pair of wrong men’s shoes after taking off my correct left one. (The different sizes of the shoes infer that my feet are actually changing somewhat in size, but my dream self does not notice this. This is similar to teeth falling out, which has no meaning but validates the dream self’s body as being fictional and in a state of cessation and with the inability to speak coherently while unconscious.) Finally, I am satisfied at wearing the right shoes and walk out the door and wake. Thus, the final marker here classifies the ending as doorway waking symbolism, which is common, where a doorway symbolizes the exit point of the dream state. Not wearing shoes is a typical dream state indicator as I do not wear shoes in bed. There are apparent shared dream state energies (or at least subliminal acknowledgment of the dream state), as the girl’s right shoe likely relates to my wife Zsuzsanna being asleep at the time to my right.

The man with the long telescope is a second-level dream state indicator. It relates to seeing outside the dream state (and is a subliminal form of the emergent consciousness as a precursor to either waking or becoming lucid), but in this case, there is no trigger despite the exaggerated length and even bumping the back of my head. (For example, in an experimental lucid dream from the 1980s, RAS activated by each of my eyes quickly extending out diagonally upwards, each becoming a telescope, symbolizing my connection to discernible consciousness outside of my fictional dream body). The vague association with a tightroper’s balancing pole is symbolic of RAS and mediating between dream state awareness and whole consciousness as related to inner ear dynamics and “not falling” (not waking with the biological falling sensation or hypnopompic kick caused by the shift from unconsciousness to consciousness, the reverse of becoming dizzy and passing out when awake).

---

I was in abandoned industrial area of some city. I bought an old factory for a really low price. Next I started buying weapons, and recruiting gang members. We were preparing for a big robbery.

In the downtown we were waiting in a truck. This was a sunny afternoon, people were walking on the sidewalk, there was no traffic on the road. Our target were two huge skyscrapers, where stock exchange offices were place among banks. I took a Spas 12 shotgun and loaded it, then took some ammo with me. When we were ready, we ran towards the building, and quickly proceeded to do our job.

We cutted out the power, so alarm won't sound. On the other hand, elevators won't work. This would slow down anyone who could try to get to us, while were going to move towards the rooftop. People were afraid to do anything against us. We quickly took the money and escaped. When we got to rooftop, my associates betrayed me.

I quickly dropped the money and dodged their shoots. I decided to take them from surprise. I jumped from the rooftop. They thought that I'm dead, but I jumped onto the cleaners elevator. I moved up, and attacked them from behind while they were trying to get to the other skyscraper. They striked back, but I dodged every of their shoots, leaving no one.

Instead of going to the other skyscraper or using the cleaners elevator, I ran down the stairs. The police arrived then, but I managed to shoot them out. I ran to the streets, took the truck and escaped.

A few weeks later I was in a hosing projects. I took a telescope, and watched people with different lenses. I went to the local corrupted police officer, to get information, and send some troops to some place.

I was walking around downtown Chicago. There was this huge canvas tent that took up an entire city block. It was several stories tall and had different floors inside it. I stepped inside.

It was like this huge antique store with lots of fancy, expensive stuff. One dealer came up to me, and he was like, "Check out this awesome telescope I've got for sale!" I checked it out. "Look at how easy it is to fold up! I mean, look at how smoothly all the little wheels work!" He showed me all the bells and whistles, but I was unimpressed, so I moved on.

I went up to like the middle story of the tent. There were lots of naked women sitting around. I was totally unprepared for that, and it made me really embarrassed. (You bet.) They were apparently dancers in a musical that was happening in a playhouse across the street, and they were getting into their costumes. One lady with nothing on below the waist came up to me and took me by the arm. Apparently, part of her outfit were these flesh-toned pantyhose with pubic hair glued to the genital area, and it had gone missing. (Supposedly it was to make her appear to be naked without actually having to BE naked.) She wanted me to find them for her, but I couldn't.

Then all the performers cleared out, except for about three people. One in particular I noticed. She was sitting on the floor, listening to one of the other two tell a story. It was apparently a funny story, and she laughed a lot and seemed to enjoy herself.

So, this one is very long, and very fuzzy in my memory. So bear with me.

There's some dude with a glow stick on my front porch. My mom and me were in the kitchen. For some reason there were cupboards outside on the porch. The guy was looking through them. Eventually the guy left and we stood up.
*Memory blindness*

My dad came in from work, and said "They're after me, for tax evasion". It sounds kind of nonsensical, but in the dream it was clear as day. We started running upstairs. Since this was a dream I was running slowly and my talking came out as whispers. I don't get why I don't do a reality check then! Agh!

Anyways, we ran upstairs and locked ourselfs in our rooms. For whatever reason I had my little cousin Heidi with me.
*Memory blindness*
Something about burning telescopes
*Memory blindness*
Reading Heidi a kiddie book
*Memory blindness*
The next morning after all that, we got on a plane and headed for where ever. Suddenly the rest of my family was back (was this a new dream?).

I apparently was flying the plane, and I said "This is your Casey speaking (Casey's my name) thank you for flying who-cares airlines". It actually looked like a flight simulator, as I was in 3rd person.

Would that be classified as an OBE?

*Memory blindness*
We wound up in a bar or something, drinking beer out of straws. I wasn't drinking, and a good thing too, I'm under aged.

I guess I forgot the rest. I'm really sorry for not remembering much. If I had any sense at all I would delete this, and say I couldn't remember it, but, meh.

Note: I had a half a pill of melatonin that night, so maybe that effected this?

dream : comments : lucid

25th of May, 2012

So I haven't posted in my DJ in aaaaaaaages for two reasons:

1. During my most successful ever fortnight of lucid dreaming, the whole DreamViews hack incident happened and, after spending nigh on 3 hours posting all my cool dreams, I realised that the site was fake and I'd spent all that time for nothing.
2. School got really intense the last couple of months and I've only just finished and have some time to get back in touch.

Mainly reason 1, though. I plan to get back around to posting those dreams that were lost, because some of them were truly spectacular.

But for now, to wet my feet again...

I had a series of vouchers for a shopping spree. They were ridiculously good savings like "50% off" and "everything for $125"
Somehow they became related to a competition where you had to find a Golden Ticket, a la Willy Wonka.
I was in a petrol station and saw a chocolate and thought "I'll kick myself if it's in there and I don't buy it, besides, it's only a couple of bucks" so I picked it up and lo and behold, there was a Golden Ticket! Hoorah!

So the competition became that we had to use these vouchers in a set time limit in this famous guy's store. I don't remember the name, but it seemed to be quite an important aspect; like I should set it up in real life or something like that.

Anyway, the gist of the competition was that we had to convince the people selling stuff to let us use our vouchers. I wanted a telescope, but the girl wouldn't accept my 50% off voucher coz it was $1000, so I offered to pay her the difference. I ended up losing the competition anyway and not getting anything.

It gets a bit blurry there but I soon found myself in a telescope store checking out all the different models. They had really ornate cool ones that looked like old wooden record players and hyper-modern ones as well.
Eventually this lead to me trying to convince David Bowie that he should help me buy a telescope but he was too caught up in his acoustic performance and the fact that he had to keep changing his wigs.

The dream faded there, or shortly after, and the next thing I remember is riding a motorbike on a forest trail away from a helicopter that was shooting at us.


Man! Feels good to get this back on pixels!

Dream: February 2, 2012

There were at least five parts to this dream. Unfortunately I only remember one of those parts.

On my street, a clear blue day. Looking through a telescope at the sky, and the ground, at the Sun (DON'T DO THIS IN WAKING LIFE!). Not as bright as I thought it would be.

I was on some sort of trip with my school and it was filled with people from our ski club, so I assume it was a ski club trip. We arrived at some sort of field and pulled over on the left side of the road for some reason (in America, mind you). Then, suddenly, my mom pulls up in our car alongside the bus as we're all getting out and tells me I can take it if I want. Not being one to pass up a good offer I accepted. I took the car and drove a short distance through a casual neighborhood with a few friends accompanying me. We got the house, got out of the car and brought our stuff inside. The dream then skipped to an upstairs bedroom with a lot of electronics and stuff sprawled out on the floor. I was sitting on the floor using my laptop when somebody came in and asked me if I wanted to go to the store with them. I agreed, got up and went outside.

Once there I could see a large group of about a dozen people. We were all going to go together. I decided to take the car but for some reason I drove very slowly and with the window down so I could listen/talk with them. I drove along a back road with everybody else walking in the middle of the road making conversation. Then, we got to a corner with a stop sign. I stopped, looked both ways and saw a car coming from the left. I started to pull out a bit but stopped thinking I wouldn't have any time. Then, realizing that I had just enough, I pulled out as fast as I could. The other car proceeded to turn down the road I had just pulled away from ...

We got to the store which was just a small convenient store on the corner, similar to a 7-11 or something of the type. Once we got there I got out of the car and everybody else that had been walking along side me had caught up. One of them said, "Hey, smooth move back there. You almodt killed yourself." in a rather sarcastic tone. "Hey, I had plenty of time," I told him. "Oh well, doesn't really matter since you're asleep." He replied. "Wait, what? Are you serious?" I asked him, skeptical at first. "Oh yeah, its like 5:00 AM, go ahead, do a RC." I plugged my nose and tried to breathe in and I could! Awesome! A DC made me get lucid!

"Well what do ya know, you're right! Thanks, man." I told him. "No problem, just don't waste it." He replied. Not wanting to waste it myself I rubbed my hands a little bit and focused on my surroundings. I thought of the TotY and the first one that came to mind was the hubble telescope. Alright, I have to fix it, I think. "To Cape Canavaral (or however its spelt)" I said as I snapped my fingers, picturing the space shuttle launch station. In an instant I was standing in front of a space shuttle and there was some odd looking thing on the tip of it, what I presumed was the telescope. I jumped up to the top and sat down right on the tip. The mirror was a perfect seat

"Launch it!" I yelled. After a short moment I falt a large shaking and could hear a low rumbling. I looked down and saw fire and smoke coming from beneath the space shuttle. I sat back, relaxed and got ready for a ride. I could feel a slight force pushing me down towards the ground that slowly grew as it flew higher and higher. After about 10 seconds the force got to the point where it was hard for me to move. I leaned back, tried to relax and waited for the shuttle to get into space. After about 25 seconds the force was completely gone and I felt what I think was weightlessness and started to float up a little bit.

Once we had gotten into space completely and started to orbit I got up and started to look around the telescope. The bottom part of the space shuttle which had contained all the fuel had fallen off by now and it was just the telescope. I couldn't see anything wrong with it and had forgotten which part was broken in reality. I pulled out a walkie-talkie from my back pocket (no idea how it got there) and radioed down to earth, "Hey, uh, guys? Isn't there supposed to be something wrong with this thing?" I asked. Aftera few seconds I got a reply, "Uh, well, by the look of the take-off I would say you're damn right there's something wrong. The mirror is all fucked up!" It said. "Okay, where?" I asked. "Well wouldn't you like to know, you're the one who sat on it and bent it all out of shape you fatass." Hey, I'm not fat

"Okay, well... how do I fix it?" I asked them. "All you have to do is bend it back! I should look almost flat but a tiny bit concave." The voice said. I looked at the mirrors again and noticed that one of them was bent way out of shape, the opposite way they were supposed to be shaped. I floated over to it and pushed down on the mirror. Forgetting I was in space I just pushed it without anchoring myself to it at all. I ended up just floating back a bit and the telescope didn't move, at least from my perspective. I floated back to the telescope to give it another try. Floating in space was a lot like flying in a dream in general. I just thought of where I wanted to go and I went there.

This time I put both my hands around the edge of the mirror and used my knees to push the glass. I started off gently, not wanting to break it, and then pushed harder and harder as it refused to move. I had to push extremely hard just to get it to bend. I'm glad we didn't have to break it . I looked over at the other mirror and tried to match its angle. Once I thought I had gotten it right I radioed back down to earth, "There, is that better?" I asked. "One second, we're taking a picture of the moon." They said. After a few seconds I got a reply, "Alright, it looks good. Good job fixing your own mistake." Jeez, they're mean .

I had figured that, since I had already gotten one of them, why not go for another? I got it the last time so I could this time as well. The first one to come to my mind was the titanic one. I have to survive the sinking, got it. This should be easy. I decided to have a little fun with this one and, instead of teleporting back down to earth, I dove down, head first, like a meteor. I could tell that I had entered earth's atmosphere by the time I was on fire. It wasn't uncomfortable or anything, just warm, like being in the bright sun. It took about 5 seconds but when I felt like I was getting closer to the surface I looked up, or down in this case, and saw all blue, what I assume was the ocean.

It came up extremely fast and before I knew it I was underwater. I must've gone down about 200 feet. I suddenly felt very heavy, as if I had weights on myself. No matter what I did I couldn't get up to the surface. I tried snapping my fingers to simply teleport to the surface, but nothing as happening. I tried the same technique I use to fly but this wasn't working either. Freaking out, I closed my eyes and pictured being on the deck of the Titanic. I snapped my fingers and, when I opened my eyes, I was awake in my bed, slightly out of breath. Looking back on it I should've stayed in the dream, given that you can never not breathe in a dream, hence the nose plug RC. If I had just relaxed maybe I could've stayed in the dream and done more. Oh well, I still got another one of them done. 7 down, 3 to go.

Good morning, everybody.

Dream #1

It was a bright, clear day. Charles Bronson lay on his back on a stone step or bench that felt like it was either the top bleacher section of some really tall stadium or some high point on a building.

Charles Bronson was naked except for a diaper, which he was currently wetting. A young, pretty blonde woman sat at Bronson's feet, waiting to change Bronson. From the look in her eyes she liked the fact that Bronson wore diapers and wet them.

Dream #2

A woman was on stage right before or at the beginning of an event like the Oscars. She gave a short speech and then said that the announcer for the show would be out to present in one moment.

The stage and the theatre seemed really large while the woman had been speaking. I had seen everything from a far back, high up row. But now, as the woman left the stage through a door to the left, my view followed her. The woman walked out into a fluorescent lit hallway. I turned back to look in at the theatre. The place looked really small.

My view was back inside the theatre, as if hovering just above the people in the first rows. A kind of old man walked in through the door through which the woman had left. The man may have made some comment about seeing the people in the back row. So he put a telescope to his eye. But he put the wrong end of the telescope to his eye.

I could already tell that the guy was going to make some kind of gag about how it seemed like the people in the back row were really far away or how it was like everybody in the audience looked really small or something like that. I kind of didn't want to hear such a groaner.

But the guy seemed to be delaying this joke. All this time he had stayed halfway in and halfway out of the door. Now he shuffled sideways all the way into the theatre and up onto the stage. I assumed he would make his telescope joke once he was up on the stage.

Dream #3

I was laying on a couch, on my back. There was a window somewhere beyond my feet, letting in some grey naturaly light. Just beside the couch's arm on which my head was resting there may have been a bookshelf. I think I had my hands under my head.

A little girl with long, brown hair stood beside the couch. She wasn't wearing any clothes. She may have eventually crawled up on the couch to sit beside me. She told me, "I wish I had boobs."

I told her, "Be glad for the time being that you don't have boobs. Probably once you have them you'll think they're a real pain in the neck."

The little girl was now gone. There were a lot of people in the room now. I knew an older woman was coming to talk to me. I may even have heard her call for me. So I sat up and looked back.

The couch was apparently in some place like a cafe or a grocery store like Whole Foods. The room I was in was somewhat like a living room. But beyond this room there were food counters and display shelves running down a kind of narrow hall that I think opened into a bigger room.

There was a pretty full crowd of people, maybe men and women in their late twenties, looking around and shopping. From them I saw the woman, kind of short, skinny, with short, grey and black hair coming through the crowd. She asked, "What did you tell that little girl?"

I didn't think that anything I'd told the little girl was wrong. But I saw how it could be construed as wrong. I lay on my right side, shouting out something to the woman. I thoujght I had been telling the woman what I'd been saying to the girl. But at some point I realized I wasn't telling the truth at all. In fact, I was telling some kind of nonsense story that would look like I was trying to cover up what I'd said.

So now I really focused on what I was saying. I told the old woman (wherever she was), "I told the girl that she should be happy for the time that she doesn't have boobs. Because once she gets boobs it'll be a real pain in the neck. Because guys'll be chasing her all over the place."