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I'm somewhere on Bali. I'm with one white male friend, though I forgot who. It may have been San. There are also some other people. At first I'm talking with two other guys I think. I've packed my suitcase a tiny bit, but still need to do a lot. We were doing something unrelated to packing for a while. Then I look at an analogue clock and see the time. If I remember correctly, it was close to noon. It is already way too late. I'm gonna miss my flight! I start packing everything real quickly and in a panicky way.

Somewhere along the dream I start looking for my boarding pass, which is already printed. I panic some more because I can't find it. Eventually I do find it, but then lose it again. At first I'm happy that I'm already checked in, because that will save me quite some time and maybe allow me to catch my plane. Then I realise that I have baggage that needs to be checked in as well, so it doesn't matter that I'm already checked in. Damn.

An intermezzo into a different dream situation. I'm standing in front of Fer's room together with San. I knock on the door and within a second San opens it. Dude.. you're supposed to wait... Fer is on her bed and scrambles to cover herself with the blanket. Somehow a bit later, Fer is gone and I'm in the room with San. He starts messing through her stuff. I tell him to stop. This is not his business and we have things to do. He keeps going. I don't understand why he is acting so weird.

At some point I finally order a gojek [motorcycle taxi]. I should've done so way earlier. Stupid. I'm surprised to find out that when the gojek arrives, the driver is a woman. My baggage now consists of a small and a big backpack. For some reason my friend and I have switched big backpacks. I'm not sure how I'm handling my small backpack. I get on the back of the bike. There's a boy sitting on the bike as well. It's 3 of us on one bike, me at the back. I'm the only one wearing a helmet, which I consider fair as I have the most chance of falling off. We stop at a supermarket for a bit.

I was in a cabin of sorts. I was with friends. I baked/cooked a cake for another friend whose birthday won't be on till after a few months. I thought of putting it in the fridge. For some reason, they had some reasons not to put it in some fridge located somewhere. One was in that cabin but for some reason, we had to move. Something about disturbing the spirits. We also thought of putting in the house fridge but won't the person find it easily?

We "went out" of the place using a special key and a special door. We traveled through the spirit realm (why?). And we walked and avoided and escaped the malevolent spirits of the realm. There were two particular spirits we avoided: one was a male shadowy figure that follows us and one white ragged woman who screams and chases us. I remember hiding behind some crates and avoiding her. There were also some "puppy spirits." At least they looked like puppies. They were used by a teacher and some children to practice escaping from. There "attack" in swarms. I was going through a door when a swarm rained in. I led them out the door with difficulty but without any negative emotions whatsoever.

Somehow, I was caught and I felt my physical body turn to the left. I was told in the dream it's wrong and somehow spirits can enter that way.

This part happened somewhere in between. There's no linearity in the dream (like in some dreams). I was with a family flying through space. We went through zero space, and we've "heard" about some delays in such a travel but thought they were rare occurrences and don't have any serious repercussions. There was a boy (third-person) in this family who seems to have such a delay and asked where the others were and what took them so long. For the rest, it was an almost instant flight. I was that boy (first person).

We were being chased by other space fighters (I don't know the name of the small space ships used to harass bigger ships without causing a lot of damage due to the energy shielding). I had a hard time with the controls. I turn too fast so instead of arcing back, I end up facing the enemy almost face-to-face with our ship. The rest were away. I was eventually able to control it enough so I see... stars and space and space stuff instead of a poorly modeled image of the fighter or the nearby planets and moons. I felt elated.

My ship was destroyed. I was possessed.

I was in a familiar place. I think it's the place in the "first" part of the story. I was kept in a room, and I felt different. I felt like I was glowing and there's a tingle throughout my "skin." I overheard that a woman (a friend?) was partially possessed. I went out/through the walls and doors and approached her in a room. I "absorbed" whatever was possessing her and I left. I felt stronger.

I think this is a separate story but somehow still connected to the possession dream. I was at home. It was evening and very dark. We went home and closed the gate, but somehow, someone forgot to close one of the two gates. There's like another perimeter around the house, and there are two boys/guys just outside the inner perimeter, which means the outer one was open. A child was talking but I could barely understand. Mom was saying something too complaining about the other gate not being locked.

I was outside the house. It was morning, or at least daytime. Someone was teaching me how to fly properly. I was able to "jump" on the first level with his help and then jumped the next two after. I looked up and saw the clouds. I was elated. I wanted to fly about the clouds and stay there. I was partially lucid and happy to be able to experience that.

Everything was falling apart. Buildings were crumbling down. Alien attack? It was like a game in 3D. I used my possession skills to hold back falling buildings and debris. I felt powerful.

I woke up feeling powerful and in control.

---

Notes:

- I went to sleep feeling down. After a few days of anxiety due to an overwhelming addition to my required subjects to take to finish school, I had my previous dream that really brought me down. I could barely do anything so I went to sleep. That was around 7:30 pm. I woke up around 10:00 pm. I thought the dream was so long I could swear I woke up around 3 or 4 am.
- I felt powerless these several months, from failing to finish some courses I need to proceed with my long-term plan to being unable to complete Inktober or start NaNoWrimo (again). I think I was trying to regain control by putting an enforced structure (school).
- There were a lot of mental chats that had no image. I was talking to myself about the meaning of the dream within the dream. A short while after(?) waking up but still lying down, I thought about how I reclaimed a part of myself (through possession and self-destruction) and it made me (feel?) stronger.

Questions: How do I know this feeling of control is not as illusory as the feeling of lack of control? Both have real-life repercussions if wrong, and even if right, how do I distinguish what's within and without my control? How do I know I'm making the right decisions if my senses and mind betray me?

For now, back to basics: simplify.

I dreamed of a guy I dated but who ultimately rejected me. We were talking in a cafe or some place. It was a lighthearted talk about what happened and about how he was already dating the other guy and me asking why we dated (or tried to date...?) anyway. It was really light, and I forgot most of it when I woke up, thanks to a raging headache and asthma attack threat.

Now, it just hit me full force and I can barely write this down.

Other details: It was evening. It was in some familiar place but can't remember exactly where. There was a train and bus station. Somehow I got lost going home or at least going away from that place.

I'm travelling around somewhere with some people. I think it may be Lombok, but I'm not sure of that. Eventually the map of the island that I'm looking at is Bali, though it's also something different at other points. My group backtracks a part of what we've already done on motorcycles.

At one point I may be on another island again. I'm driving my motor straight down a road. Eventually I come across a middle aged white couple, which has a house here. I wonder how they've managed that, considering that only Indonesians are allowed to own land. We end up talking for a bit and within a minute or so, they offer my friend and I a place to stay. I thank them for it, but let them know that we already have a place. I may take them up on it on my way back. A bit further down the conversation, my friend San starts to make racist black comments. I quickly tell him that I don't like them. It doesn't take long for him to continue making the comments anyway. I become quite dominant and tell him that I do not like these 'jokes.'

I was in a story. I was looking for a book or a series of books. It slowly slips away as I type. But I was on some sort of small island, but it's developed. There were buildings, houses, towers. Even a mansion I think. But there were still a lot of trees. I was traveling from one area to another looking for something. Or avoiding something. The mood was mysterious but not scary.

Inside a house/building, I talked to a woman and a man (a butler?). I forgot our conversation but it's about the "mission." I think of gathering books.

I remember mentioning I was in the part "The Tower."

I roused myself from the story and "woke up." I was walking and a dog was jumping about nipping me by the hem of my shorts or by the legs. It wasn't painful except for the feeling of anticipation that it's supposed to feel at least painful.

Last night bed at 8:30 or close to 9pm. I'm off today, but I got sleepy and I want to keep my sleep schedule anyway, so I can WILD in the morning.

Had this dream before 1am

I'm in New Zealand. Something like an exchange student, only I'm not a student. But I'm in a family I don't know. The woman is getting me things, showing me rooms. It's a long and detailed dream, but don't remember much except this:

They take me to a large room to meet the elephant. The animal is huge. All black with short, shiny hair. Kinda like beaver hair, just a bit longer. Very dense, black, shiny. I'm standing in front of him and I am a bit sad for him. I'm thinking how I always wanted to touch and elephant's trunk, when he starts moving his trunk to me and he touches my hand with the tip of it. I feel that he is old and smart and I appreciate his touch.

Last night bed 9pm - 3:30am

DR ar 1 am

Me or someone has a private 747 jet. We are thinking where to take it. Aspen, Cannes. I tell them those places have remodeled their airports so now even big planes can land there. I'm walking around aspen airport outside, on a hill.

DR2 at 1 am

We are going to walk somewhere with another person, maybe my mom. She wants to go certain way. We go there and I show her lots of deep snow and I tell her we would be sinking in it. It's so deep, at some places small caves have formed. I look at one of those caves and there is a baby in clothes laying on the ground, moving his arms and legs. I yell at someone to call the cops, there is a baby in a cave. Because of the commotion, a man who was laying behing the baby sits up and is all confused. I tell them to call the cops off, baby was not abandoned.

Then I'm in some apartment hallway. I witness a conversation between "mom" and another woman, probable a reporter. She is telling "mom", that tha'ts the way to go if she wan't to get custody of kids and make "dad" look bad for leaving baby alone. I realize it's a scheme and I start recording it on my phone.

DR ar 3:30
I'm in an apartment in a tall building. Suddenly there is fire and some guys starts running around, trying to get away, without telling us. I look for it and I see smoke. We start gathering our pets. After a while it looks like the smoke is in some distance outside.

Last night bed around 8:30pm - 3:20am

DR 1:19am

Long at detailed dream of me hanging around the China - US border. Mountainous region with high mountains, steep with lots of greenery. Kinda like the Asian "dragon teeth" mountains. I'm wallking around the town, lots of people. I look up at the chinese and american flags on top of the mountain, side by side, just feet from each other. I think "so that's already China there". I take some pictures.

Afternoon nap today.

I'm at work (ugh). Walking fast, with purpose, as I normally do. There are boxes and carts and I'm organizing others how to put them.

I'm outside of a bus full of people. I hear that someone is being a bully in the back of the bus. I get on in the front and tell the driver that I will get on in the back door, to wait for me. I get on, grab the bully by his shirt collar and drag him off the bus. People are happy.

PokeFam

It's the middle of the night and I'm in my bedroom. I hear Dad in the kitchen and I assume he's making himself some two minute noodles (as he does sometimes when he wakes up in the middle of the night). I roll over in my bed and check PokeFast, a live Pokemon tracking map for Android for nearby Pokemon in my area and spot things out of the ordinary - dinosaur-looking Pokemon!
I had certainly never seen those 'Pokemon' nor caught them before. I start to dress to go out hunting for them. My brother walks in to the room with a drink bottle in hand and asks me what I'm doing. I picture him in the passenger seat of my car spinning Pokestops and catching Pokemon for me while I drive us around. I ask if he wants to come catch Pokemon with me.

Japanese Magazines

I'm in Japan and there is some sort of craze going around. Like, literal craze. People's minds turning into Zombie-mush craze. I'm suddenly running in to one of the street convenience stores with a big group and stop at the magazine sections. Stopping to look around, I think about how bizarre this is.
I'm on a rooftop looking down to the street at a swarm of crazed people about to flock in on a girl. Poor girl.. She's a goner.

Running with a bunch of people behind me, ninja jumping from rooftop to rooftop. My legs are pumping, trying to maximise each crouch for explosiveness There's a sense of urgency, as if we're being chased.
I'm suddenly standing in a doorway, waving my group inside. We've been caught. We bundle in the corner, huddling together, trying as to magically shrink ourselves so we wouldn't be seen.
Slowly, they converge on us. It was as if what we were running from was an army. The lower ranking soldiers filed in first, with their commanders trailing behind. They didn't seem to be able to detect us until they got extremely close - almost touching distance. One of the low-ranking pawns was getting close to a child... This was extremely bad for us.
I make eye contact with one of the commanders. How could he see me when none of the others could? In the brief moment of which our eyes made contact, there was some sort of... acknowledgement and respect. I turn my attention back at the pawn and reach out, waving my hand as to perform a jedi mind trick :gun: He looks confused and walks around to the other side of the room.

But This Is Your Crib

I'm in the passenger seat of the car, driving around a neighbourhood with a few friends. The shops which we're driving past look nice, up class and new. They were styled like 1960s shops with very bright colours. We're trying to find our way back to our rented house in this neighbourhood, the same neighbourhood which one of the guys in the car apparently lives in.
"I think this was your neighbourhood," I joked with him.
He grumbles something incoherent at me.
We'd finally made our way back and it had gotten dark. Walking in the streets under the streetlights with no purpose in particular, other than to explore and enjoy the company of our friends. We pass a man playing guitar on the side of the street, singing his heart out to a large company of dogs. They were his children and he loved them all dearly.

The details are a bit vague. I'm travelling, though I'm mostly just seeing a map top-down. It's vaguely like the view of the old Pokemon games. I'm travelling in my city in Indonesia at first. The map is incomplete. It's cut off at the left and right. Eventually the map does change and I travel some more I guess. At one point I'm able to see Manila on the map. On the map, it is below my city and it's quite small. In the dream, people have told me that it is not really a special city and it's quite small. Still, I wanna see it, just so I can say that I've been to the Philippines. When I look at the map again, the location has changed. It is now somewhere way further down and it's a tiny island. It's just north of an area called the Spanish Antilles. There's an area called the Spanish Antilles? I guess that makes sense, the ABC islands do have a Spanish ring to them. But no.. those are the Dutch Antilles.

This at night.

I'm sitting in a small room in one room apartment with a woman and a man. Man walks to the door and he says "oh man, look at this worm". I'm like "how it got there?" He replies that maybe from some potted house plants.

I'm thinking it's gotta be big, since all those exotic worms are. It starts coming closer to me when he tries to chase it out. I say to him not to chase it towards me. I get a good look at it. It's maybe a foot long (30 cm), shape of a question mark with his head raised. He has a tuft of hair on his head and large eye. He is moving like a slithering sea horse. I grab a piece of cardboard and shoo him away. I can feel him impact it and I can tell he is heavy.

He hides in some bushes and the girl with me sticks her hand in there to look for him. I'm like "you gotta be crazy sticking your hand where you can't see".



This dream from few days ago.
I'm sitting on a low metal roof. I prop myself up with my hands to jump down. What I didn't notice was some flat metal sticking out vertically. It cut both my palm. I go to a guy who is a doctor to ask him if that needs stiches. It's not even bleeding and only thin red line suggests that I have a cut. But he bends my palms and as they separate you can tell they are cut almost all the way through. He probes the wound with his thumb and it gets all messy and bloody. i wonder why, when it's clear it's a big wound.
(few days ago we talked about thumb/palm rc and how I can't do that anymore because it became so real and bloody and painful)

I'm off today so slept 9:20pm - 6:30 am

Had 3 distinct dreams.

DR1 10:53pm
I am in a huge place. It's a shape of a swimming pool, with all corners rounded and it's made from yellow/brow/greenish dirt and sand. Has a feel of foundry or some other place that has huge machinery and railings on the floor, walls and a ceiling and deals with molten metal. Somehow I'm flying near the ceiling, or I'm on some machinery being taken to the other end of this room. Trying to figure out something, how to fit some equipment to the one already there or something like that.

DR2 2:57am
I'm looking at some emails that were lost till now. They were send in May (I know in a dream it's already August) but they were delivered just now. I'm reading them. One says something about mom of some kids not being comfortable with some social events done on behalf of her kids.

6:30am
I'm with a large group of people in New York. They seem to be owners of some grocery store and other ultra rich people. I don't feel right among them, they seem to think I belong there. One older lady speaks to me in Yiddish and I'm thinking now they will realize I'm not one of them.

Everybody has a bike now and they give me a different bike. It's ultra slim frame and wheels. They are designed for street races. I'm testing it out as we all start to bike as a group. I'm testing the hand breaks, righ is the back and left is the front brake. I keep my feet down a bit before I sit on the seat to see if it's not too high. We bike through some snow and ice and kids are playing street ice hockey there. Looks like a sports park, because another group of bikers come in opposite direction so I'm not worried that we will disturb the players. I clearly see the snow and ice on the ground and I wonder why, since it's not winter.

Last night went to bed at 6pm. Slept till 3am

Had at least 4 distinct dreams. Last one, we talked about traveling and comparing sand from some beach to sand from Nile.

Yesterday's dream:
I'm in Alaska.
Somebody has a problem with 2 spirits, a boy and a girl spirit. I'm recommending someone to take care of it, but then we realize tha person has connection to spirits as well.

I'm walking on a street. I have only regular shoes on, so I'm careful not to slip. Streets are covered with ice from snow that melted then froze again. It's very slipery, has some puddles and it's not even. I get to some stores and restaurant that have an awning and that makes the walkway a bit more safe. I'm thinking I should eat there some local Alaskan fish, since I'm in Alaska.

I'm off today, so went to bed around 10pm last night and got to sleep in till 7am or so.

I am in Norway and I can distinctly feel that my position on the globe is much more north than normally. I am there with a man that I like (in a dream). He is handsome, calm, nice. We stop in a small bar and he speaks to the waitress in norwegian.

He orders a small glass of red vine and I get a small glass of also some red drink. Only after I try later I realize that it's mulled wine. I appreciate it, since it's cold outside.

I'm watching the scene right behing the large window of this bar. I'm fascinated by the ice and snow. Some people and even kinds are walking on this ice that's broken up into small ice floats. I'm surprised they are doing it, since it's dangerous and I'm wondering how come they don't fall into the water. But they seem to enjoy it and they know what they are doing. Now I am outside as well. Two girls approach, and they are having fun as they are walking on the ice that has a layer of melted water on top of it. The ice is smooth, shiny, and one girl has only one sock on, the other foot is barefoot. I don't see any pants on her and maybe only a long sleeved t-shirt, but she is playing on that ice, even laying down and doing snow angels kind of thing.

In general I have good feeling from this dream.

I was with my aunt. She was attempting to show me some video of something on vhs. The video she put in looked like it was an after school special from the 1980s, and as we let it play it became apparent that the teenagers on the video were talking about being gay. It wasn’t the video she had hoped to show me, but before she could remove it my grandfather (her father)whom had been in the room— played by no other than George Bush Senior in this dream- became upset and started lecturing my aunt on how it was wrong to be gay, why would she play a tape like this, etc. I tried to step in and said that young people think differently now, and that there was nothing wrong with it.
He listened with a concerned but not angry look on is face, and then tried to explain to me why it was wrong. He asked me if I was an artist, I said yes and that I was pretty left-leaning in general. I said didn’t know what it was like to fight in a war but maybe some people he fought with were gay. (Thinking of Bush’s WWII days I guess) He tried to list statistics and I forget what happened after that.

There was an open door to the outside and I heard the sound of a hawk. I knew before I looked the it was a baby hawk, and I went and picked it up and moved it over to a ‘safe’ place on the edge of a parking lot with other little baby birds.
Later I was handed a kitten, and I walked round with it and showed it to people.

My husband and I were on a trip in Europe. We were at the beginning of a many-legged-flight. The plane almost left me behind. Instead of being inside of the plane my perspective was from the rear outside of the plane and as if I were laying in bed. We were in the air for what seemed like five minutes when the pilot began the landing procedure. I felt the plane speed up tremendously as we descent, and we landed on a cobblestone or brick road in between to long rows of cargo shipping containers. The plane drove along this road until we reached the sea, and the he stopped the plane perched on a semi-steep rock, so as passengers exited they had to step partially in water and then climb up a wet, slippery rock. The pilot laughed at us.
We had landed in Spain or Greece (people were saying both) though it looked more like a town from a fantasy novel. The sun was setting and the sky was pink. There were giant, intricate marble statues of animals and trees all around. I was taking photographs. Some people went into a convenience store.


Thoughts:
Hmm. A conservative patriarchal figure. The subject of homosexuality broached. Baby birds. Traveling, planes, statues. I keep wondering if any of this was spawned by something I watched on television recently. Especially the George Bush part. WTF was he doing here? He sort of reminded me of someone…not my father or grandfathers…I can’t place it. This just occurred to me—I wonder if he was supposed to represent my aunt’s real father (my Mom's real father), who passed away when she was three and before I was born. He was conservative and religious, and he fought in the Korean war. My grandmother had remarried when I was very young so the man I knew as my grandfather on the side was my mother’s step-father.

The giant marble statues almost seemed like Gods. I have thought a bit about mythology recently, and perhaps I was scanning the gods from above in my mind in this dream.