• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




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    1. Why Dreams Don't Traumatize

      by , 12-04-2017 at 04:23 AM
      I wonder... why don't dreams traumatize us? The nightmares I've had this past week were so profoundly awful, if these scenarios happened to someone for real, it would surely cause deep emotional and mental damage. Murder, being murdered, horrible torture, frightening 'hauntings', ... stuff that really makes your stomach turn. Yet when I wake up, it takes only a good 10-20 seconds for the fear and horror to 'wear off', and then it's like nothing ever happened.

      Does it have to do with memory? Dreams are generally easily forgotten, but even the ones I still remember perfectly (like when I've just woken up) feel like they're immediately covered in a kind of "haze" that robs them of their power over me.

      Or is it just that we consciously know the events weren't real (those aspects of higher consciousness are generally turned off during regular dreaming), and when our consciousness 'boots up' after waking, it dispels the hold the dream has over us?

      I had this thought because I realized I must have died a million times at this point in a million different ways, and have been hunted down by more demons than there are in Hell. But when I wake, all is hunky-dory.
      Categories
      side notes
    2. Nap Induced Dream using the Keyboard Technique

      by , 03-29-2016 at 01:06 AM
      I used the Keyboard Technique w/ my fingers & had a dream that I was aware of being in a dream & could change things but I did not have the higher state of consciousness hence, I did not open my eyes when that ah-ha moment occurred which makes the LD not genuine. True lucidity has to have this. For some reason, a lot of ppl don't seem to get this concept. My dream was about my son who's home from college & we were in a house arguing & he hit me.... I have a good relationship w/ my son & this would never occur but do to bickering over my new cat who is being territorial & relieving herself on his bed, this has made for some tension lately but totally normal & understandable.
      Categories
      non-lucid
    3. Humanoids and Space

      by , 11-26-2014 at 02:24 AM
      Outside the gym, parking lot right up against woods. Park my car on the edge. Right off the edge the woods goes downhill into sort of a giant ditch. Nighttime. There are random pumpkins throughout the woods on the ground. Friend goes to check it out, breaks a pumpkin. There was a humanoid trapped in the pumpkin. Kind of like a fetus, but it would have never hatched if someone didn't break it out. Once broken out of the pumpkin humanoid was normal adult size. They look different though, kind of fluffy, more teeth, etc. I break more pumpkins, friend leaves at some point. They're heavy and difficult to break, it's hard work. Suddenly they start coming uphill on their own and breaking out on their own. I'm a bit scared, they just keep coming out. I'm not scared anymore, they're greatful to me. Government shows up and starts fighting them for some reason. We hide, I am their leader. Lots of running around the woods, etc.

      Suddenly, I teleport to a different solar system. I fly over the outer planets (there are a few of them, then the two that are alike in color and size, then a small one near their sun. Their sun is a dull white color, as I fly into it, I become that star and I shine larger and more yellow (even though scientifically, the yellow is cooler, in the dream it feels warmer). Then I see from a 3rd person point of view, the sun and a moon hanging out in human form in a pool. They're in love, but for some reason it feels like it's wrong.

      Fast forward to the center of the solar system, I, leader of humanoids control the team of robots. There used to only be 450 of them, now there is a team of 1800. They're like robots or mechas (think japanese anime), they can also terraform, activated by me with the code 06. I experiment moving the terrain.

      Funny "WILD"-dj-solar-system-11.25.2014-smaller.jpg

      Updated 12-09-2014 at 09:43 PM by 71799

      Categories
      non-lucid
    4. Syncope

      by , 08-13-2014 at 02:42 AM (Threecat's Dreamtime)
      This morning I visited the doctor to get some blood taken. During the drawing process, I lost consciousness. The time in between was basically lost--I do not have any real solid feeling of "being" anywhere, except some flitting images or colors that my mind was attempting to process. I couldn't even really claim to have had a "self" at this point--basically just a feeling of confusion and bewilderment. In retrospect, I imagine this is what animals must feel like at times, and it was highly . . . disconcerting.

      As I began to come out of it, in darkness, I had the distinct feeling of being in both a sitting position and a lying position, and it became crucial to me to understand which of these my body was currently in. Once I was revived (eyes open and conscious) I still did not recognize any of the people there (my doctor and two nurses) or where I was until my doctor explained what had happened. I tried to explain my confusion: "I didn't know where I was!" My doctor very compassionately nodded, as though he understood. Maybe he did. Very unpleasant experience--basically fatigued for the rest of the day with a mild headache.

      So here was what came to me: was what I experienced coming out of the state (or within the state? hard to say) an example of what death will "feel" like? If so, I can only say I expect it will be terrible--at least the dying part.

      Updated 08-13-2014 at 07:26 PM by 69552

      Categories
      memorable , side notes
    5. [The Devil is in the Dance] (An LSD induced waking dream.)

      by , 04-08-2013 at 06:29 PM (Searching For The Center of Everything)
      4/3/13

      ================================================== ==============

      [Alright. I'll try to keep this to the point. Forgive my confusing scattered words. It's taken me my whole life to master this level of communication... and I'm still very far from being the Master.

      I'm assuming this topic is alright for DreamViews because it ties heavily into my dreams and general life.
      And I'm assuming people here will talk to me as if I'm not "psycho". And be quite loving and understanding.
      BLESS the ones who aren't offended at my words.

      If anyone has read Charles Fort's works, they'll understand what I mean when I say:

      In every truth lies the hint of what can be called fantasy, and
      in everyone's yarn there lurks something of what can be called the truth.

      Please keep this in mind. This is an experience that is a little "off".
      It's an experience- incompleted by the knowledge of what it was I experienced.
      I'm missing the right way to relate this to you.
      I know what I felt, and I know what I thought I understood about it.
      That is all. And nothing more. Like many humans, I am filled with pride and vanity.
      But I acknowledge that I TRULY know nothing.
      I am not claiming to know anything on these subjects.]

      All times are approximate.

      Please keep an open mind.

      This is my experience with Lucy.

      ================================================== =
      __________________________________________________ ____________________________
      [Background]

      My name is Austin.

      4 days ago, I experienced Lucy, aka "Acid" aka "LSD" with my "perfect-for-me" girlfriend.

      Her name is Alex.

      I love this tragic girl bottomlessly, so much it hurts. But this trip was different than with shrooms.
      This time, I caught a glimpse of one of those most peculiar facets of reality.
      I caught a glimpse beyond the veil. I felt something else's presence among the two of us.
      I think it was what the Alchemists and the Shamans and the Wizards and Philosophers
      and Dreamers and Scientists and more... would understand as "Lucifer".

      Not many people will understand what I'm about to say.
      That is because what I'm going to say CANNOT be put into these helpless words. Not in these hopeless worlds.
      Hopefully, someone on these forums who has experimented with altered consciousness-
      Will understand these metaphors and will relate. I hope someone knows what I'm talking about.
      I will do my BEST to explain them to the others who don't get it yet.
      This is why people who are actually on to something- are soon discredited as incoherent or such.
      What we seek cannot be put into words. The words will escape you like sand through fingers.
      Reminiscent of deja vu. If someone demands you explain these secrets, it won't happen. It can't.
      Experience is the only way. First-hand.

      Now.

      I believe Lucifer can appear as and through different things to different people.
      But to me it was or was through the gentle and mysterious lover.
      The fiery serpentine chasing me up the spiral staircase.
      Lucy was the image in between the mirror. Behind the lights.
      She was there- but not in a physical sense. The lights would glow brightly when she was close.

      My experience with this "entity" was gentle. Loving. Harshly beautiful. With a tinge of dark.
      A hint of mystery. He/she told me things through my girlfriend. Beautiful things.
      The problem is- my girlfriend claims that I was lost in a trip the entire time.
      Conversations I thought I had between us, were just conversations with myself...
      Through my girlfriend. But I'll have to ask for more faith from YOU
      that I know that I was talking with "someone" whether it was my girlfriend
      or an "entity" of less-than-physical existence. It may very well all have been in my head.
      But I'm implying that perhaps that's how this thing works.
      It IS all in your head. But at the same time it's not JUST in your head.

      Oh man, it makes you double take on schizophrenia and general insanity in the world.
      What if one of these people screaming on the street are screaming the truth?

      Lately, I've been having these reoccurring thoughts in my head that I'm somehow Lucifer.
      I just notice all these similarities to me and the angel they call "Lucifer".
      My cardinal sin is Pride. I'm a dreamer, a musician, a lover, a woman and a man.
      I don't belong here and I feel out of place. I equate myself to a Lion.
      I seek knowledge. It reminds me of the story of the Apple of Eden.

      I have a STRONG intuition that I'll meet Lucifer on Lucy.
      __________________________________________________ ______________
      [Austin]

      I was one of those "weird kids" you find in school... That never did and never will fit in.
      The quiet, smart, awkward kid. The outlandish kind. But I've held on to my innocence.
      Longer than most could- I still have real good in my heart. I still have that light inside.
      I feel like I have a perfect blend of female and male inside. I feel almost superhuman inside.
      But broken at the same time. Like something is missing. My heart is full, but my roots are dry.
      But I have a love for horror. An amorous pulling to the mysterious. Everyone has these things.

      But I'm uncontrollably thirsty for knowledge. Wisdom. The way the Universe works, in all her wonder.
      I've procrastinated the ignition of my life. I've waited to begin my life-
      Just to bury myself in books. Drowned myself in watery facts and ideas.
      Pondered for hours on "reality" breaking ideas. Ideas that would make sheep panic.
      Ideas that only excite ME. "Maybe the world isn't as boring as I thought," I thought.

      My life works in symbols. Archetypes.
      The boundless ocean. The mother. The Lion. The female. Green. Autumn.
      The King. Duality. Trinity. Clocks, and Stuffed Bears. Dreams. It doesn't matter.
      But it does.

      I know about the connection between you and I. Through reading, experience with dreams,
      books of esotericism, books of all sorts!, and simple observation. It doesn't take a genius to see
      That there is someone pulling strings in reality. Watch those coincidences.
      Try to find connections. It used to be impossible- Then it became improbable.
      Now it's highly probable. I know most of you will take me as insane.
      There will be one who takes these words just right.

      Lately I've been noticing the insane improbable-almost-to-the-point-of-impossible amount of coincidences.
      The Universe was talking to me all the time. I just needed to tune in.
      __________________________________________________ _____________________________
      [Alex]

      She's the most interesting human I've met so far.

      She has reason behind everything she does!

      If she were an element, she'd be fire. She's a white Tiger she says.
      Her taste is deliciously refined. She knows what she likes.
      During Shrooms, I noticed something very peculiar.
      While everyone else in the room tripped blindly.
      She unscrewed light bulbs, turned things upside down.
      I saw it. It resonated with me.
      It was her act of defiance I think that caught my eye.
      Her rebellion against the collection of rules we call society.
      Mischievous girl. I understand she'll break my heart one day.
      ...
      She grew up so fast. She's had a miserable life so far.
      It beat the shit out of her. Her Mother is a monster. (Broke my damn side-view mirror that bitch.)
      She never had a father. (He left before Alex was born.)

      I've noticed that she does NOT attract happy karmic events.
      If there ever was an unlucky human, it was her.
      Her life hands her more shit than most humans would be able to handle.
      She is hardened to this cruel world. The pessimist out of us.
      But she knows things. She knows how it really is.
      I'm wary of her. But just as wary as someone can be
      of someone you love more than anything.

      Our relationship is confusing.
      At times we're like best friends.
      Sometimes we're enemies.
      Sometimes we're just animals using each other.
      But when it's all said and done...
      All I want to do is hold her hand and keep her safe through this lifetime.
      That is what I'm here to do.
      If there's anything that's real in this goddamned life, it's that I TRULY love that girl.
      __________________________________________________ ____________________________________
      [0:00]
      We walked into my bedroom and placed two blotters each (piece of paper with LSD dropped on) under our tongues.
      We sat around for a moment and began to feel excited and restless. Hence our decision to go to the local convenience store to grab a drink for the trip.
      We smoked a bowl and headed down the hallway to go outside.
      "Do you want to drive?" I dangle my Miku anime-keychain.
      "Mmm... Yes!" I barely offer it, but she barely ever accepts. I become aware of the symbolism in that.

      (throughout that day, I had seen the theme of "Lucifer"
      sowing itself in and out of the tapestry of reality. Through coincidence. Shit happens, you know, but you'll start to notice that a great deal of that "shit"'s probability doesn't match up with the general idea of probability that society has built. Too many coincidences to be without an explanation. Too much smoke to be without a fire. I'd see pictures on Tumblr of serpents and horns- I'd see references to the Bible and things like that- but there was just so much of it today, more so than usual.)



      Pulling up, I asked my girlfriend, "Do you know the story of The Garden of Eden?" ...
      "Yeah, I know about that story." She humors me.
      "Well... sh-should I trust him? I know I'll have to meet him eventually..."
      "I don't know..." She knows.
      "Huh." I drop it.

      I know she doesn't understand my curiosity. I accept it's just one of our differences.

      We grab our drinks- 2 thirst busters, and a pink powerade for me and a blood red powerade for her.

      When we get back to the house, giddy and excited, we metaphorically "stumble" through the door.
      I mean by that- that we were a little "off" by now. It had been 30min. We were walking perfectly fine.
      Talking a little strangely... but perfectly functional. Just a little "different" and "strange".

      __________________________________________________ ___________________________________
      [0:35]
      As we walked back in the room and shut the door, she unloaded a pocketful of things and change.
      I pointed it out to her that she was becoming a little more like me.
      "It's because I love you." It made sense. I picked up a lot of her traits at times too.

      We sat on my bed and loved on each other a little. Tickles, talking, touching, pictures, videos.
      It was about an hour through, that we started to feel a little more than just "stoned."
      The first stage was the breaking of the shell. The realization that there's more to "you" than just "you."
      I watched the clock and became the clock. My awareness controlled how I existed.
      Visuals were normal. If a little more relaxed. "Diffused" is a good word. "Unfocused".

      I stayed consciously aware of what I was feeling constantly. It was creeping up pretty slowly- but it wasn't anything like I had felt before.
      I could "feel" it coming on, as I could with other things. It felt like... a drop-off. A cliff.
      It felt like I was hanging off the side of a great cliff, dangling over the abyss from a rope.
      Alex told me several times throughout the trip that that's how I "felt", as if she could feel what I felt too.

      We immediately went to work with our music playlists that we had planned out. I'm usually the one who spends time thinking about the future (making playlists for acid trips is a good example of this), but Alex surprised me this time by being prepared. Notice this coincidence.

      She listened to her music first. Of Monsters and Men. The Head and the Heart. Modest Mouse. Bright Eyes.
      Amazing music. But it left me wanting something more familiar.

      On to my music. I felt around with my ears the following: Gorillaz, The Beatles, Vampire Weekend, Arcade Fire, Radiohead, Panic! At The Disco...

      Oh, such beautiful things tucked away neatly in these songs. A word to the wise:
      Alot of these bands know what they're talking about. They know what I'M talking about.
      It's all in the music that we listen to- secrets. But remember that words can't describe what I've seen.
      But music is a better language for something like this.

      Take note that "Lucifer" is constantly associated with things such as "light, music, beauty, etc".

      Well back to the trip. By this point, another hour has passed. I had been on the brink of tears countless times now from what I'd seen
      and momentarily forgotten.
      (Amnesia sucks. I have reason to believe my human is plagued with holey memory. I hope to one day find out why. Probably heavy fluoride in the pineal gland.)

      __________________________________________________ __________________________________
      [1:15]
      Now, me and Alex just wanted to talk again.

      She told me about what laughter was for.
      She told me that:
      "Love is strange- If you get too filled up with that wonderfulness [love], it'll make you sad. You need to let it out every once in awhile.
      It's meant to be shared."

      My god! Right in front of our eyes. Laughter was the human mechanism for sharing love with the world. The letting out of steam.
      It was biological as much as it was just... oddly metaphysically organic. I mean by that... ... no. I'll have to leave that one for you. It's a mechanism of my higher-self as much as it is my human.

      "If you start to feel sad... it's because you need to let it out. Share it." If there's one thing I held on to throughout my trip, it was this.

      Countless times I felt that well of sadness rising up. I pushed it down by laughing at how wonderful everything was. I just looked around.
      I laughed at how crazy I was for thinking I was talking to the devil. I laughed at how impossibly-obviously it presented itself to me.
      I laughed at how all of my favorite bands had all of the answers to my questions- but in code.
      I laughed at how awkward my soul piloted my human. I would lean into kiss my lover, and land somewhere else and just laugh.
      I laughed at how perfect she was. How she always found the perfect thing to say to me. It was like a storybook. Like a dream.
      Like I had always wished and wished for. She completed me, like a puzzle piece. How curious.



      My soul wasn't very good at integrating me into society, in general, I observed.
      I just have never understood the importance of fitting in. Never in my life.
      If I had a finger to point... it would be at my soul.
      From what I understand...
      He should be the one who deals with matters spanning over the 4th dimension... over and outside of time.

      But...
      I am him. I just sometimes forget.

      __________________________________________________ __________________________
      [1:45]
      Alex.

      She was different now. She was still her. But now with a mischievous grin. Cheshire was smiling through my love's face.
      She walked like a Goddess, like a perfect little hipster indie kid. (I think that's what I would incarnate as if I were Lucy.) [I'll call her Lucy.]
      She pointed to my antique clock and told me the face was the surface of a pond. She was pointing at my symbols. She knew what it meant to me. She knew I had always equated myself with the element water. She knew my personality was watery in itself.
      "It's like a dirty pond with scattered numbers."
      She knew about my shaky relationship with time.
      The pond represented me.

      She got up and stretched. "Man, all this damn water." ...again, referring to ME.
      As if she had finally seen the real me.
      She said it as if just arriving there to that moment in time, before flashing me a grin.
      Again, I got the impression of being in the presence of a Goddess- in the flesh. She knew I knew.

      She analyzed my life so far and hit every nail on the head. With such grace and the perfect hint of mystery to keep me there. She talked about my innocence and my attachment to my inner child.
      I have a stuffed animal, a tattered old bear- she told me that my child was beaten up.
      My innocence was hurt.

      I think I feel the need to use the word "her" because I was still clinging on to egos. I was afraid to be one with this. All the warnings.
      All the damn warnings from humanity. Avoid the one they call the devil. I struggled within myself against it.

      "It's like a bunch dolls in a dollhouse." She referred to the bodies we inhabited.

      At this point- my mind was so far in the "strange". My nerves and senses were totally "not-normal".
      I didn't think of it as, "Sight" or "Hearing" or "Feeling"... it was more of a five-pronged color wheel of general sensation manifesting itself as a big picture. I mean... My senses began to blur into one sense.

      And the trails. Oh my... There was a mesmerizing soft blur behind any sort of movement.

      I also began to notice catching weird alien thoughts in my own head. I felt like I was tuning in on Alex's thoughts.
      I STILL can't figure out who it really was that first wanted that cigarette. Also...
      I would look at Alex with a question and she would verbally respond.
      Me and Alex began to slowly realize something. Not that we were melding consciousness. But that we already were one consciousness.
      I was getting my first understanding of what "Duality" and "Unity" truly meant.

      I spoke incoherently, akin to Jack Sparrow. I was trying to grasp an idea.
      It was being relayed to me from outside of my head, that's for sure.

      But here's a metaphor to help you understand what I mean.
      Sometimes, if you stare directly at something...
      It vanishes.
      But if you learn to look with the corner of your eye.
      You might get a better glimpse.

      If I thought too hard at an idea, it would run away.
      Same with Lucy/Lucifer. If we chased after her, she would vanish.
      She would stop amusing us. She had a tendency to sneak in and out of our trip.

      And then something happened... she tried to get me to kiss her. She had that devilish look in her eye.
      I... recoiled. I subconsciously knew that what I was dealing with was indeed very heavy. It meant something.
      And I needed to be perfectly conscious so I could make a decision. These cautious thoughts were definitely mine.

      I know what LSD can do to you. You have to keep your mind clear and empty or else you'll convince yourself of something.
      I decided that this vision or feeling of dancing with the devil was TOO persistent to be a simple delusion.
      I might be an odd human, but I know that these was DEFINITELY something more to this than delusion.
      Truly, there's some truth in my yarn. But I kept a clear head so that I would feel the feelings as they came.

      I was forced to make a decision of a life time. If I went through with this, I had a feeling my life would never be the same. But my life was always so boring... I kind of ached for it, you know?

      Vampire Weekend summed it up perfectly:

      "It’s not right but it’s now or never
      And if I wait could I ever forgive myself? "


      I finally kissed her back, pushing through my hesitation. It WAS just my girlfriend.
      I kiss her all the time. But this time it was mixed-up, fearful, and hesitant.
      We lost ourselves in our slow kisses for awhile. And suddenly...
      for JUST a moment, I woke up from the Matrix that we live in.
      I realized in that moment that I was NOT my body... or even my mind, for that matter.
      Whatever I really was, it was "green" and "bright" and "vibrant" and "full of love".
      She was more "grey" and "scarred" and "hopeless" but "wise" and "full of texture"
      The best way I can describe what it felt like... I was an amorphous living "thing".
      A giant changing organism of "light". I felt MYSELF (I'll capitalize when I refer to our higher self.)
      brushing up against my lover... in an alien landscape, in alien bodies. It was more beautiful than anything you've ever experienced.
      It was scarring to someone who wants to remain ignorant. I now knew.

      She knew I had finally seen the true HER. SHE was disfigured and bruised from the horrors and disappointments of her lives.
      I held her body close and radiated an infinite love that she had never felt before. She knew I knew. She knew I loved her regardless.
      I didn't get to see any specifics, but I know that we've known each other intimately besides this life. Same with all the people in my life.

      We cuddled for a little and loved each other. I accepted every little part of her, and she accepted every little part of me.

      __________________________________________________ ____________________________________
      [2:00]
      We laid in my bed and stared around my room. It was as if I was my soul, checking up on my human. My room was a wreck.
      Disorganized and messy. I scolded myself. My eyes caught all these symbols that I would have never caught.
      I looked at my long hair and saw my female trying to claw her way out. She was desperate to be seen and pet.
      It was tragic. I felt a little drunk- by that I mean that drunken feeling of trying to walk. A great happy cheerfulness filled me
      despite my slight lack of coordination.

      I had to go to the bathroom though... I was afraid to be away from Alex, so I hesitated...
      "I REAAAALLY need to goooo."
      "Okay, I'm going now."
      "Alright baby, here I go."
      "I NEED TO PEEEE."

      (I said all of those... probably 20 seconds apart. Stalling.)

      I worked up the courage to break away. I drifted like a ghost down the hall.
      Once in the bathroom, I got on my knees and peed close to the toilet (a strange habit I'd picked up years ago).
      I got up, and checked myself out in the mirror. My pupils were huge. I could see my soul showing through my eyes.
      It was beautiful. I always thought that was beautiful. Enlarged pupils are subconsciously attractive to me.
      Then I returned to Alex. We were both thinking about the same thing now. Ourselves.

      We both stared at our vessels with self-love. She began to talk again,
      "You know... I never really got why people are so against this." I knew she was referring to our self-love.
      "If you have what you have, what's the point in Not loving it?" -She continued while eyeing herself with love and a hint of lust.
      I did the same.

      Sometime throughout the trip, I stripped naked and watched my body closely.
      It was so... gorgeous. My male and female energies were so balanced.
      I marveled at my body's hips and legs, and my shoulders and eyes.


      (I'd always had a deeply ingrained disgust with egoists.
      Egotistical people had always disgusted me. They were never going to grow, because they were so weighed down by their own empty weight. My religious Dad pointed out that I had pride in my eyes, countless times through my childhood. He made sure I knew it was wrong.)

      (But... I couldn't find an argument to this one. I had always thought myself and Alex to be extremely attractive.
      In a different kind of way than what society could see. I would walk by a group of girls, flicking on a switch inside.
      I would think confident feelings, I would KNOW that I was sexy... and the girls would always look my direction and blush.
      I had that power. Everyone does. And if it's already there... It's just a matter of turning it on.)


      __________________________________________________ __________________________________
      [2:30]
      Alex had to go pee next. It had been 2 1/2 hours now. She left to go to the bathroom...
      But I found myself following close behind, as if I were going to the bathroom as well.
      As if we were going to share that experience. I paused and realized that I couldn't follow her in there.
      She chuckled at me and left.

      I realized I still needed to pee! I normally was very "good" at holding my bladder.
      But this time felt different. Seconds had passed since Alex left the room.
      "I don't think I can wait." I said to myself, alone in my room.
      I panicked when I thought that perhaps Lucy had something to do with my bladder un-control.

      Then I realized it. I wasn't feeling MY need to pee. I was feeling Alex's need to pee.
      I had already pissed. Now it was her turn.
      Only catch.
      I was going to experience her turn.

      When it finally dawned on me what was going on...
      I began to squirm and struggle to hold in my bladder-
      While I was experienced pee-ing.
      I could feel it so clearly. It felt good~
      But I was unable to enjoy the relieving feeling due to my panic.
      It reminds me slightly of orgasm, but just a hint.
      I'm proud to say, that I LSD didn't make me piss

      I continued to squirm, until she was done.
      Then I walked out of my room and met her at the door to explain.
      She grinned at me.

      __________________________________________________ _________________________________
      [3:30]
      At about 3 1/2 hours.
      We fell into the bed again, and fell entranced by my ceiling light.
      It broke my popcorn ceiling into a crystal kaleidoscope.
      It began to glow intensely. We lied there in that room staring at that light forever.
      It was so fucking beautiful. I could tell that there was something "more" to the light.
      There was something "behind" the light. "Inside" it. "Outside" of it...
      Wait no... There's no word for it. "Within" would be the best fit.

      Lucy was close-by. The light vibrated. The ceiling crawled.
      The room came to life. We were coming to a peak of the trip.
      Alex snapped me out of it.
      "Don't let it take you away."
      What a strange thing to say, I thought.
      I'm sure she knew what I felt.
      But I looked away and broke the spell.

      Our gazes returned shortly after.
      She gasped- "I can see your heartbeat in the ceiling."
      Both of our jaws dropped. It was true. The light was pulsating to my heart.
      We were pushed back against the wall and the bed... HARD.
      But it was because of how incredibly beautiful and powerful it was.
      The entity.
      ... ...
      She joked for the third time, "If this is the peak, I'd still be disappointed."
      I laughed at that challenge to Lucy.

      We sat up from our bed, feeling like we had lived an eternity in moments.

      The green curtains had crawling vines. If you relaxed your eyes on them, they would move like crazy.
      I could also see aura around Alex. Her's was red.
      She told me mine was a bright green.

      By now, we had abandoned words for the most part. We both realized how much easier it was
      to communicate in "soul-speak", in thought, and in feeling.

      __________________________________________________ __________________________
      [4:30]
      We walked outside. Oh. My. God.

      "There's a world out here..." We both gasped. We were coming down fast.

      But that one moment when I first experienced nature... our SUN, the neighborhood.
      I will never forget it. It made me gasp in my female's voice. It was THAT powerful.
      I was powerfully aware of our position in the solar system. That big glowing thing in the sky...
      It's in a very basic sense: "Alive".

      Fire is... "Alive." Plants and animals... they're "alive and conscious".

      My only metaphor for this... would be...
      There's these Mexican candies... I forget their name...
      But it's a plastic container, with this spicy/sour chile mango
      Squishy candy inside.
      You squeeze it out through the top and it comes out in strands.
      Like squishy red grass.
      The inside of the container is primal life. Life in it's most basic form. Before it's manifested in this world.
      When it's squeezed out, it seperates into egos and distinctions. Each little blade is a different manifestation of the same thing.


      (Matter is alive too, just vibrating at a different level. But I digress- back to the trip.)

      My lover and I sat beautifully in our bodies. I followed her to a spot in the shade, out of the morning sun where we found our perch. Watching the school children and other humans waking up, and going to school and work.
      We sat there and watched, understanding that they may never know the things we know.
      They may go their whole lives and never see the truth.
      I began to grow nervous that people were walking about as, well, we were tripping balls in my front driveway.

      I shook it off, "Ah fuck it. A school bus of children could pass by for all I care."
      A school bus passed 6 seconds later. Me and Alex eyed each other and knew that Lucy was still with us.

      We had a conversation between a human God and Goddess in my front yard about the tops of trees.
      She pointed to the top of the pine tree before us.
      "You know, the tops of trees are my favorite parts of trees." She spoke softly.
      I thought to myself of whether there was symbolism in what she said.
      She paused before saying, "It matters."

      She reminded me of plants. I had always wanted to communicate with one. I cupped in my hands a yellow flowered weed next to me, and I closed my eyes. I felt something. But not very strongly. I felt impatient.

      "You want to go inside, don't you?" I had a feeling.
      "Yeah..."
      "Well... can we wait out here for just a second?"
      "Yeah, as long as you want."
      But I couldn't fully enjoy it, now that I knew she wanted to go inside.
      I asked one more question... It was aimed at Lucy AND Alex.
      "You aren't going leave me... are you?" The insecure little girl I had once been was asking.
      I began to tear up and almost cry at the thought of being disconnected from this in the future.
      I don't remember her answer. But it was good. I remembered to laugh, so I wouldn't be sad.
      So we got up and walked inside.

      __________________________________________________ _____________________________________
      [6:00]
      It was approximately 6 hours into our trip, more or less.
      Lucy was still here, but in a less HERE way.

      (INTERJECTION: The overwhelming clarity of LSD is so strange to experience, in stark contrast to the drug propaganda out there. Do not listen to your government on matters like this. You have to trust your heart on this to know if you're ready for something like this. I was ready. I've been waiting for this day my entire life.)

      Now I wasn't talking directly to Lucy. I was talking to just my Alex.
      She noted that I had been talking "past her" for the past few hours.
      That I had, in reality, been lost in a sort of trip. But I know what I experienced.
      I have faith in it. And I will not let the world shake it out of me like they do to the rest of us.

      Back to the experience. I confronted another demon of mine.
      My occasional lack of passion. My lack of red and orange and yellow.
      My lack of masculine energies.

      Alex was calling me to her. She stretched her beautiful body in my bed, like a cat.
      I knew her body wanted mine. I knew her animal ached for mine.
      But I am not the normal male. Not the normal man.
      I didn't feel like a wolf ready to take control.
      I was unsure and awkward. I felt wrong every time I tried to force a passionate kiss.
      I couldn't fake passion. So I sat there awkward.

      I don't know how many Panic! At The Disco songs I heard before it happened.
      (Panic! was playing on shuffle the first time we made love.)

      She took control. She pushed me against the bed. She has what I don't have.
      I tried to fight back... but she was too strong for me.
      I quivered and moaned like the female I felt.
      She touched my body and made me feel powerless.
      I began to tear up in fear and quiet submission.
      Oh, it was then I felt real passion.
      This is one reason why we're like puzzle pieces. We match.


      Sometimes I curse myself for being born in a male body, when I'm so obviously not.
      But I understand that things happen for reasons. Perhaps I chose this existence to make amends
      with my masculinity.


      I'll skip out some pretty details.
      But there was passionate kisses.
      "I can see why humans do that." She smirked along with me.
      It was a physical means to elicit a reaction in our souls. It was a way to communicate.
      We were trading delicate feelings through lips.
      Two aliens; two children of the stars-
      experiencing what it was like to love as humans.
      Oh the impossibly mad love.

      Once I felt that passion in my bones...
      The man in me awoke. The wolf.
      I grabbed her and forced her down like I wished she would to me all those times.

      !@#$%^&

      I came earlier than I wanted to and I sat in shame for a minute.
      Alex knew what my look meant, and she told me that she had felt amazing regardless.
      "So why worry?"

      __________________________________________________ _________________
      [7:00]


      Alex eventually fell asleep.
      We cuddled together and held each other close until then.

      Then I was alone.
      I moved to my computer.
      I was compelled to listen to "Colorblind" by Counting Crows.
      It was an anthem of my human and soul, specific to me.
      It touched my hurt that I had accumulated as this specific human.
      My awkward un-belonging. My prison of skin. My lack of color.
      (Books, the only thing I had found solace in before... can only show you black and white.)

      I cried my eyes out. I couldn't fight the sadness back.
      It all poured out. I was terrified of how deep the feeling was.
      I went to Alex and was about to shake her, when
      "I'm fine." was sung.

      I knew this was a sign from the Universe to let her sleep.
      I was fine.

      (The Universe or Lucy or whatever it was... sometimes sends me winks.
      "Coffee black and eggwhite." is a line in that song."
      My best friend's Dad just poured me black coffee and handed me an egg sandwich while I've been up all night typing this.)

      It's truly a humbling thing to know that your entire life is a part to a play.
      It's just a dance. It's put together very delicately, with lots of love and care.
      But sometimes if you REALLY look closely, it's like a movie.
      We all have a part to play. Dolls in a dollhouse.

      __________________________________________________ _______________________________
      [End?]

      So that's my story so far. At the same time, it's all of our stories. We've all met Lucifer in one way or another. It lives inside of all us, whether we like it or not. It's all a matter of becoming aware of it.

      I'm not trying to convince anyone of anything. Just sending a message out in a bottle.
      For most of you, you most likely will categorize me as delusional. That is fine.
      This is just an oddly fascinating and fantastic story to you. But I have faith in the dreamers.
      I know who I'm talking to. They know who they are. The right people will answer me.

      It's all just simple math. What I'm talking about sounds magical... but it is very real.
      Perhaps, one day it will be considered common knowledge. Accepted science.
      But until then- we need explorers who are willing to chart this new frontier.

      __________________________________________________ _______________
      [Some of the other things Lucy told me through Alex...]

      "You don't belong here. You feel it too, don't you?" I had always felt that.

      "You're a very very VERRRY special, human, Austin. I don't think you realize how special you are." I knew this was truth, but it felt like a dirty truth. It felt wrong to say and obsess with. I know I'm meant for something big. But it's not all about me.

      "You're INCREDIBLY beautiful." She stared at me sometimes... just as I had stared at the beautiful light.

      "You've been waiting here, an anomaly in this world. Waiting for something alien to return you to your home."

      [I also "realized" a few things by myself.]

      I saw that most the people I called friends, were actually entities I knew outside of this human life.
      A few of them I was "tied up to" or "chained to" with karmic debt.
      My best friend is VERY pushy, and if I don't listen to what he says, I feel a backlash of negative energy.
      I'm starting to realize that I actually am VERY far in debt to ALOT of people.

      I also found that I was meant to go to a certain concert in California called Coachella in the middle of April.

      I realized on my own that I'm destined to be a famous musician. That sounds horribly egotistical.
      But you'll understand if you're ever in shoes like mine.


      And lastly... I started the apocalypse. Maybe it was me individually, or me in the general sense of humans.
      But when I came out of my trip, instantly I saw new signs of chaos.

      This whole Korea business became frontline news. I've seen and heard ambulances every day here since.
      People have been talking about the upcoming war in America. People have started making plans.
      I think I might move to Seattle eventually. I have a feeling it might be safe for me.
      Since me and Alex are both extremely drawn to this city.


      __________________________________________________ ______________________________________
      Please... if you're curious or have questions, please ask.
      If you have something to add to my experience, I would certainly appreciate it!

      It's a wonderful world out there, dreamers. Get out there and feel it for yourself!
      For all you wisdom-seekers, may you find what you're looking for.

      Updated 04-08-2013 at 06:57 PM by 57330 (grammar)

      Categories
      lucid , memorable , side notes
    6. Iboga: My First Lucid Experience From Materiality to Spirituality & a New Committment to Lucidity

      by , 11-16-2012 at 07:51 PM
      I ingested a traditional tribal "flood" dose of Iboga, a oneirogen that induces a waking dream state for 12 - 48 hours & has been used for centuries by the people of Gabon as a coming of age shamanic plant. Basically you're Lucid Dreaming while awake. I decided to take the root when I found out about it & how unlike hallucinogens the visions you receive from Iboga are not vague or open to much interpretation. Many people see parts of their life replayed, they feel the pain or joy their actions caused. Some see deities or significant people in their life including people who've passed away. Some people claim it's the tree of knowledge of good & evil from the bible.

      It was risky for me to begin with because I have a heart condition & Iboga is very intense on the heart. The idea is to experience complete ego death which is followed by all the visions. Going through hell to get to heaven. Knowing this I decided to take the root right before going into the emergency room so in case if anything happened I would be in good hands.

      I was really yearning for a spiritual aspect to my life which had been lost. All my life I was told what to believe mixed with my own beliefs & thoughts about all these different possibilities. I felt as if it would be best for me to experience what is true for me spiritually myself. So I decided ego death & true transcendence along with visions of my life would give me some answers. Needless to say, I was not disappointed.

      Introducing your new resident metal-head..... ME!-226022_173492909452774_1369104690_n.jpg

      It started to come on subtlety at first, in the emergency room waiting area things became very dim & dead looking like all the warmth to colors was slowly being sucked out. I started to feel as if I was riding some giant wave of reality in isolation of everything around me. Like the world could swallow me whole at any moment. I started to get worried because the waiting room was full & only 30 minutes into a 2 day experience I could already feel some effects. I kept trying to stress the fact I had ingested something that could send me into a psychotic break, get sick, or kill me. That I needed to be in a bed with a heart monitor & people who could check on me & bring me water while I began to purge.

      I eventually get to a room & there's a bed, I'm questioned by doctors nurses & staff constantly as I'm starting to trip. I tell them I ingested it for spiritual purposes & that I should avoid being overstimulated. I purposefully brought a long a sleeping mask & my phone to play music to help move things along. As soon as we made it to the room all this was taken as a precautionary measure to ensure I wouldn't try to hurt myself or someone with it. They kept questioning me for what seemed like an hour. The first part of the trip felt like my body was trying to escape reality, the conscious voice in my head got increasingly paranoid about death, going crazy, saying something wrong to the doctors or nurses. I increasingly was drawing a complete blank as I was being questioned, I kept saying umm more & more as thoughts escaped my mind. My consciousness was becoming consumed with fear as I lost the ability to think & create a coherent sentence. One doctor made me feel guilty saying I ingested a hallucinogen & I was wasting taxpayer money in my "recreational pursuit". This was a search for truth, for meaning. Eventually I asked to be left alone trying to avoid over-stimulation after I answered the same questions about 5 times to 5 different people.

      I drank some water which was brought to me & my heart starts pounding like crazy, I hear this intense buzzing in my ears that sounds like I'm near a high voltage transformer or surrounded by beehives. My heart is spiking off the charts on the monitor & I'm told I went into VTAC Ventricular Tachycardia (where your heart beats so fast it could stop). I'm so nauseated & worried at this point I purge into a bucket this green liquid, it looks like I puked up part of the hulk or Nickelodeon slime. I start to feel this energy building at the base of my spine, like hot magma or electricity charging up. At this point my heart is going so fast I'm convinced I won't make it through this & that before I knew it I would be moving onto whatever's next. At this point my ego is just screaming in my head like it wants to murder me, "You're going to wake up insane, you're heart is exploding get ready for the pain, you're dead.. nice job".

      Introducing your new resident metal-head..... ME!-579181_199565330178865_107535776_n.jpg

      Eventually after what seemed like hours of fighting between death & my mind I accept death. With acceptance I slowly start seeing with my eyes closed - red very strongly, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, then violet. As this is happening I feel that magma, that energy, that electricity building at the base of my spine slowly move up as I accept my fate. I kept thinking of mercury moving up a thermometer. With complete acceptance I jolted out into the universe a soul past the purple into an infinite white light. Being a part of it but there was no sense of "I" no me, no body, pure spirit & an overwhelming sense of connectedness & unconditional love overwhelming every ounce of being. Being one with the big bang, forget infinite energy, light, the realest thing you could sense in there was pure joy, bliss, unconditional love, complete peace. No thought, stillness, nothingness, the void.

      I wake up sometime later after being moved to what I learn later is the ICU. I'm incredibly lucid & the personal visions are starting to come, I'm so lucid it's like the power of lucidity carried over into waking life. I imagine this medical light on the ceiling that looks like a mushroom cap stretching & changing shape. As I believe it stretches it does so & it really seems to work when I send it unconditional love from my chest. I imagine stretching it so far with love I eventually break through the ceiling into another room.

      Introducing your new resident metal-head..... ME!-534578_194096464059085_2061048134_n.jpg

      The first room I broke through into was like a dusty old worn down house with cobwebs all over, wooden floors, a broken window, & it looked like something no one would really appreciate. I notice in the dream I'm wearing clothes that appear to be like Link from Zelda. I'm greeted by two groups of people to my right. One of which is very happy, joyful, they have an inner-childlike sense to them. Curious, compassionate, encouraging, happy to be alive. They're cheering me on & saying great things about the room appreciating everything. I get the sense this is what I must do to move on. Love the room impartially, seeing the good in it. The other group of people seems miserable, they're void of color full of grays & find fault with the room saying things like "Ewww". I decide this is not the direction I want to take & I break down the wall by loving the place I'm at.

      I end up in another room & another they're all very similar except each consecutive room is characterized by things of the chakra system. It seemed as though I was breaking down walls to move energy from the 1st chakra (the root) to the 7th chakra (the crown). The root is at the base of the spine & the crown is at the top of the head. A hierarchy of energy from the base of the spine to the top of the head; from the physical aspects of existence to the spiritual. Overall all the same lessons were to be learned. If I hesitated in loving a room, in breaking down a wall I was sent back to the beginning. It seemed like my visions were very influenced by the video games I played growing up. After a lot of tries I made it to the heart chakra (the central 4th & central chakra, the point where the physical aspects of our world become intertwined with the spiritual). Tibetan Buddhists believe the heart is responsible for the white light I saw, the white light people describe seeing before death right before moving onto the next life. Once I got to the heart alot of the questions I wanted answers to started getting answered.

      Introducing your new resident metal-head..... ME!-577036_133455673456498_106690346_n.jpg

      I wanted to know who my soul mate was, what the meaning of life is, why we're here, what is truth for me. The first answer I got was about my soul mate. Right before the trip I was torn between this girl Windy & a girl Samantha I had just met who reminded me of Windy. Then it seems as though Windy had forgotten all about me but she holds such a big place in my heart I wasn't ready to move on. A free spirit, a soul that burns in the night with a deep passion for life, a fire within that you only read about. Her way of living inspired me to begin my spiritual journey which led me to this point. Little did I know there's a reason I dream of her almost every night, why I get Deja Vu around her so much, why when we first met I felt us both gaze into each others souls & I had this incredible sensation like we had met before. Iboga showed me we're soul mates & now I'm left waiting for the right time, for a chance to be her friend. If I ever get that chance I'll make it last until the end. In the vision when I reached the heart chakra I heard my voice boom out loud like I was asking who my soul mate was, it happened automatically like I didn't even have to think of it. It was like because I wrote down all my questions before taking the root the questions were already programmed into my subconscious to be asked later. As soon as that happened Windy appeared on a green lotus flower platform suspended in space & from there she yelled "Kenny! I love you! with such enthusiasm it warmed my soul. I heard her say "We're meant for eternity, our love will stand the test of time". The platform symbolized her heart chakra as I was on mine we communicated our love & our platforms moved together suspended in space until we were together & hugged & kissed with such passion I could feel a beam of love going from my heart to hers with such pure joy & ecstasy it was as if we became one in that moment & our souls were in complete bliss just combining with the others counter part.

      Every part of this experience seemed more real than waking life & everyone I saw that I knew personally seemed to be their true self, like the inner child in them was fully out to be them-self, they were so creative & enthusiastic & passionate about everything they did or said. That alone was inspiring to me, passion is a big part of a joyful existence. Enthusiasm, joy, an inner curiosity & appreciation for everything. Every moment. Being true to yourself & not letting your mind convince you to hide or discard aspects of yourself. We have to laugh at the mind, our fears, doubts, insecurities, repression, limiting beliefs. They're all the enemies of progress & reaching our true potential I feel like I got the answers to my other questions through breaking through the walls & becoming one with the clear white light, pure consciousness, connectedness, bliss, joy, I'm a part of everything & everyone as they're a part of me. Unconditional love is the most powerful force in the universe & we have to learn to appreciate everything we do have. I live in America & have a car, a guitar. Do you know how amazing that is? We should all be happy when our basic needs are met because some people don't even have that luxury! Don't wait until you're nearly dead to start being grateful!

      This by far was the most beneficial experience I've ever had even though it almost killed me it's like every day is a gift now. When the experience was over I was exhausted & slept for quite a while, when I woke up i saw the most beautiful sunrise I had ever seen from my hospital bed & I was so grateful to be alive, I made sure all the doctors & nurses knew how much I appreciated them taking care of me. I still laugh because when I woke up the kept asking me all these funny questions in case if I had gone crazy.. You did this for spiritual reasons? You said you were selfish before? Do you think eating is selfish?

      Introducing your new resident metal-head..... ME!-76233_194096590725739_584512785_n.jpg

      Beliefs shape our reality, lucidity will show you that so take what you learn with lucidity back to waking life & meet your true potential, that is my foremost goal. Don't be afraid to explore, reintegrate lost parts of yourself, face nightmares with love & see what happens. Lucidity is an invaluable tool. In my second lucid dream ever through belief I was able to experience that ego-less state once again & I woke up feeling great! I highly recommend reading "Lucid Dreaming: Gateway to the Inner Self" by Robert Waggoner if you get the chance. I'm now completely committed to Lucidity for life. I ordered the Remee lucid dreaming mask & I'm so happy, this marks the beginning of my dream journal here & the beginning of my journey to the inner self. To reintegrating every last lost part of me. Healing what I rejected in the past & facing any & all fears. Going on adventures to space, Europe, Australia, Africa, Egypt, the Amazon all with my soul mate Windy who is still in my dreams almost every night (I bought an engagement ring by the way) & I'm saving it until the right time. Thanks for reading! I hope maybe I can inspire someone to strive for lucidity or to just go after their dreams I know my beliefs aren't for everyone. Happy dreaming
    7. 23 Sep 2012

      by , 09-25-2012 at 01:34 AM
      This particular Dream was very, long yet extremely simplistic in nature.

      I was running very fast, at a very high tempo, much like an anime ninja would run. Arms back jumping over people, through lawns, going in and out of first person and third person perspective, which is not unusual in my dreams.

      The neighborhood I was running through was my old neighborhood that I grew up in. You head south about a mile and there was my elementary school, you head north about a mile and there was my high school. In this dream I was running away from an old house that I used to live in heading south right past my old elementary school. I remember it being the last thing I saw before I woke up.

      I'm writing about this particular dream mainly because it has a large significance on a very troubling time I had in this place. This neighborhood reminds me of the worst period in my life. The fact that I was running away from the house which these remembered horrors came from tells me two things: 1) My Lucid dreaming techniques are improving and 2) This particular dream has a lot of significance with my dream research.

      My dream research has led me to the theory that we remember EVERYTHING, yet only a portion is stored in our subconsciousness and the rest in our consciousness. Reality and our consciousness 5 senses fill in the holes/fragments that our conscious mind seems to "forget."

      On the other side reality is not a factor on our subconsciousness because we’re very stationary when we enter the subconsciousness. With these facts in mind we are stuck with only what the subconsciousness has stored. Our 5 senses do work in our subconsciousness however because most of us use the crutch that is reality to guide our senses to make sense of our world, using our 5 senses in our subconscious world is very foreign and downright difficult to learn to use.

      Also! Our subconscious is where our consciousness "hides" very very bad and traumatic event memories in order to protect our physical well being.
    8. I throw a snowball to the Vampire Lord and blow up presents at Mount Crumpit

      by , 11-30-2010 at 05:02 PM (Percy's Void of Thoughts)
      30.11.2010
      I throw a snowball to the Vampire Lord and blow up presents at Mount Crumpit (MILD)

      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID


      I woke up from recalling fragments and I told my self I had to MILD and complete the task of the month to avoid being wingless. I tried to not focus on Astral Projection for one night, just to get my wings.
      I performed my Chest Technique, I focused on Who's Ville and in turning lucid until I fell asleep.


      I was in downtown and it was night. I was inside my car with another DC. For some reason, I jacket the car I was driving but I was still parked. A cop stopped behind me and ordered me to step away from my car.

      I turned on the engine and the cop gave me the last warning. I stepped on the gas and run the hell out of there. I felt it was funny as the cop was chasing me and we were making a lot of noise. The cop was shooting from his car and he blew up one tire from my car. I entered a very creepy neighbor with a lot of allies. I started to drive through them and crushed on one. I still could hear the cop car approaching so I entered a building. The cop did as well. I wanted to enter an apartment to bribe the cop. I tried to walk through the door without success. I walked to the end of the aisle and I found a dead end. I was afraid the cop would arrest me. I found a very old school elevator, so I entered it.

      The pannel looked huge for such a small building. It has most of the buttons from floor 1 to 10. It has some to floor one to 20, then it had one button to floor 96 and other one to 973. I pressed one button and the elevator started to go up making an odd noise.

      I somehow knew I was dreaming so I checked my hands. I had six fingers and I accepted that as reality, but I was not sure. I kept looking at my hands and my fingers changed to five, and then I had the thumb and two more fingers. The clarity of the dream increased and I started to focus, "As soon as this elevator opens, I will be at Who's ville." No luck. The elevator opened in a fancy floor. There was carpeting of all colors. There was violin based music and fresh flowers. The lighting was not intense at all. I looked at the carpets hoping there would be snow so I could throw a ball to someone. There were a ton of white carpets, some bigger, some smaller, some were pure white, some were more grayish, but no snow. My dream started to fade extremely fast. I somehow knew I was not going to save it. I need to fly to save it, however, I told to myself that I saved dreams in a worse situation and I was good about it. Imaginary was gone but I still felt my body in the dream. My eyes were closed and I tried to open them badly with success. I was back in the same hall.

      At the end of the hall, there was a big fancy bar. The tables were Sequoya wood, hand made and beautiful. There were a couple of DC at different tables. It appeared there were having a workshop of something. The bartender approached at me and offered a drink. I told him if he had some sort of iced-drink, snow drink or something. i tried to conjure snow without success so I asked him. He told me I could summon snow if I wanted to. I placed my hands on the table and I focused like if I was going to make a PSI-Ball. My hands were in the position like if I was holding a baseball.

      I started to fell my hands very cold and I had some short of half-melted ice on my hands. I grabbed it, threw it at the bartender and flew away from the window. I was not really happy, as I threw more ice than snow, but I felt it was half a success. I hopped to get to Who's Ville to do the task better.

      It was day now and the cops were gone. There was quite of traffic and my dream started to fade again. I performed same recovery than before with success. I did not want to do big efforts as I knew that my REM was about to expire and I was just prolonging the dream. I tried to catch a taxi. I had no cash, but who cares... I saw a few taxis that were full. I walked in the middle of a busy street and the light turned green. I recalled that someone a few months ago suggested to be ran by a car, but I passed as I did not do my December tasks yet.

      After a few failed attempts to catch a taxi, one stopped by me. It was a sports car (but on the outside it looked like a regular yellow cab) there were no back seats and the driving was sitting (almost laying) on the right middle of the car. I tried to open the door without success. I did it with more strength and I finally got in. I said, "Hi" to the taxi driver and, "I need to get to Who's Ville please!" The taxi driver looked at me like if I was nuts. I told him, "Just figure the way, I know you can get me there"

      We arrived to an odd place and my dream again wanted to end. I saved it with the same method. I was in a home with the taxi driver. He was in front of a TV with a PS3 controller. He told me, "This is the closer I can get you to Who's ville" I was somehow upset, but I recalled that the exercise was, "Steal all the presents in Who-ville and toss them off of Mount Crumpit" so if I did it on a "Who stole X-Mas" game, it would be fine. The taxi driver requested payment from me. I pulled something metallic from my pocket and hand it to him. It was more like a piece of junk. The taxi driver looked at me mad and said, "Real cash, please." I looked at him confused and he said, "All right then. That will be a donation! Have a good one!" He left and I grabbed the controller to complete my task. I could not find the video game's character.

      My dream again, tried to fade and did the same recovery ability with success. I was starting to get mad. The dream was too long and trying to end and I was not done. I felt a chill around my body and I realized I was inside the game. The ground was covered by snow and it was snowing. The place looked quite creepy, but at the same time, it looked very X-Mas. I knew I was in Who's Ville. I saw a Who's entering his house and it was very dark outside. I told to my self about how I was going to steal all the presents. I did not feel like entering home by home. I tried to make all the presents to come out the homes from the chimney. I soon started to see colored wrapped boxes... a tone of them, flying from the homes, to me. To make sure I had success, I hit the ground to break the houses. The houses broke and they were totally empty. Not even furniture, however, a few of them had Who's inside.

      I was wondering how the hell I was going to carry all the gifts. I suddenly saw a huge DC next to me. He wore a black cape and had a very mean look. He had claws and a black face. He had vampire teeth and red eyes. He took my stolen presents and flew away. He was very far in no time and I was upset. My dream again started to fade and I allowed it to end. Four out of five of my senses were gone, but I still felt the chill. I realized there was still chance to recover it. I felt double consciousness, as I felt my body in bed, but I focused really hard, it was a long dream and I had to end it with success.

      I was in a huge room on the top of a mountain. It was snowing hard and there was a dense fog. The vampire had the presents behind him and he was laughing. I approached at him but he attacked me. I avoided his attacks and saw a metallic barrel. I grabbed it and it had some sort of liquid inside. I rose it and aimed at the vampire. The vampire's face was black and metallic. He had a very mean look but I was not afraid as I was dreaming it. I approached more at him and he said, "Its fine. Do not throw that at him, get your stupid presents." The presents were piled up in a small cart and I was super happy. I was about to leave to grab the presents, however, I grabbed snow from the ground, made a ball and threw it at the Vampire's face. I was more happy as I felt that the first task was now properly done. Dream once more started to fade, I was very close to awakening, but I could stay in the dream. The clarity was not very good, and I did another RC to make sure I was grounded in the dream. The clarity increased a little.

      I was at the top of Mount Crumpit. I could see Who's Ville from there. It was funny because all the houses were all fine now and it did not look as creepy. The quality of the dream decreased and started to drop, so I just tossed the cart down the mountain. I was not sure if just tossing was fine or if I needed to destroy them. When the cart was going down, I made a fireball and blew up the presents to make sure I did not miss a thing.

      Now that I was done with both tasks I attempted to Astral Project from the lucid, but I knew I was going to fail as the dream quality now was minimum.

      Before I even attempted, I had a FA in my room. I could not see but I felt my wife and someone else was trying to wake me up. I could not move in bed, I could hear only my wife's voice. I woke up for real.

      Updated 12-05-2010 at 04:21 AM by 31830

      Categories
      lucid , false awakening , memorable , task of the month