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This dream was so bizarre that I wasn't sure if I was even gonna journal it. But I remembered it, so...

It was a dream that was all about the concept of "not closing your velcro shoes". I was in a train station with 2 friends of mine, and the 3 of us were wearing velcro shoes, and they were open. The train arrived, and the front looked like a big unclosed velcro shoe on a railway. We went on the train and the train conductor warned us not to close our velcro shoe, or else something bad might happen. We went on the train, left our shoes open, and nothing bad happened, we were just talking about not closing your velcro shoes.

I was on some kind of open top barge or house boat. It was choc full of junk, well some of it was antique stuff and old toys. Somebody there was trying to stop me from getting something so I flew up and out of the opening onto a building roof above. The roof overlooking the river and boat was choc full of junk as well.
The building morphed a bit and became the roof of a school. I did some more flying around and at this point said to myself this dream is really going on for a long while "Are dream" maybe I should take advantage of this fact and do some stuff.
So I did some mind control on the dcs who were there then everything went black and white and I woke up unable to maintain lucidity.

note: I remember saying to myself maybe I should have a go at getting lucid as it's holiday time now. This kind of pondering intention with no expectation attached has proved to be 100% effective in the past also, lol.

Dream fragment about how I'm back in high school. I'm in show choir trying to remember the dance moves for our show. I ask my teacher what my schedule is but he doesn't know. I go to my computer science teacher and talk to her. We go to the lunch room. I remember I'm talking to her, and for some reason she was very overweight in the dream. As we're talking, I see other students looking at me. Her and I are laughing about something. She goes and sits down next to another overweight gentleman. I sit down at a table next to some guys I'm not really friends with. I look around and see my friend Alseny. I sit down in front of him and ask him how he's been.

Fragment where I'm on some sort of flying platform with a group of people. We are flying above a lake that has a city around it. There's floating docks with disney characters on them. I remember someone was pointing out the different disney exhibits on each different floating island. There were people swimming in the water up to the docks to go to the exhibits and townhouses on docks surrounding them. At some point we flew down and joined an exhibit with cannons shooting fire.

Different location where I'm at a beach house with people from my childhood. I'm up on the second floor with some old man telling me things that will happen while we're lying in bed. I look up and see an old man and I feel that I'm working at a spa. The man starts to pleasure himself as myself and the workers are yelling at him to stop. I wake up out of bed and the old man is telling me that was going to happen.

At some point I'm downstairs at the pool of the house. I see my friend and during conversation I say something like "I told you so Chappy." I see my childhood friend's dad named Frank and another dad so I greet them. We have small talk. Jaden Smith is there and whatever he is performing is just awful. I'm jumping in and out of the pool.

The dream interrupts. I realize that I'm in sleep paralysis and am sort of thrown off. I didn't expect this to happen. Usually when sleep paralysis happens I sort of see it coming and then get hit by it, but this was instant. I'm lying in my sister's bed at home. There is not a door right in front of the bed IRL but in my actual room there is so in the sleep paralysis I imagine one. As soon as I imagine it I know where this is heading. As the door appears I close my eyes. I hear it slam open. I can feel my body flinch into my bed although I could not move. I try to throw myself upwards but nothing budges. My imagination brings someone into the room. I know who it is, it's Pennywise the dancing clown. My eyes are closed. I feel the vibration as he walks up to the bed. His deep voice speaks at me from my right. He says "I told you not to say this Grey." I can feel that when he says that, he moves very close to me. I become very calm as I want him to come closer.

I wake up not wanting to go back to bed.

I've been thinking about lucid dreaming for months now, feeling the vague urge to get back into it. Still, I've never had the proper motivation until now. I'm currently at home with my narc-dad and experiencing severe anxiety as a result, and since lucid dreaming was how I coped with all of this growing up, it seems suitable to rely on it now.

All recent dreams:

Pet Store
I had a rather long dream that was focused around the concept of pets and pet stores—actually it's more accurate to say that they were unsuitable pets, such as a straight-up crocodile, and one of those frilled-neck lizards (which I identified in the dream as a basilisk).
The pet store owner insisted that the basilisk would make a good pet and was very lonely besides. I looked down at the basilisk (contained in a glass aquarium that doubled as the pay counter) to see it scrabbling against the glass in a corner, in a way that I read as "being lonely and needing comfort." I made up my mind at that point to come back for it later, because adopting it was the only way to make absolutely sure it would be okay, even though I didn't feel fully qualified to take care of it and I needed more money.

I believe there was also something less related to pets, that had more to do with kids reading a book together. There was also something about going to a zoo.

Packing
I'm in the NH house with A, trying to pack for my upcoming flight. Unfortunately, I see that my pill bottle and the desk are absolutely covered in ants. In addition to regular ants, there are unrealistically tiny ants in a shifting mass.

Being Hacked
I dreamed that a server I was in charge of had been hacked, and the server files deleted. I didn't have a way to fix this, and I was trying to make the best of the few options I had.

The Dream:
I saw a strange dream 75 Days ago.
I saw I am in my sister's house in Tehran and Neighbor's daughter (6 years old) hugged me and told me come with me. She take me to the balcony. I saw cracks on the balcony and I shouted let leave the building everyone, It's collapsing. After just a moment I found myself and others in down of the building. I the building was in bad status. (Like Collapsing)

The Real World
Last Night was 75 day after the dream and I was just in the place (My sister's house) And earthquake happed. fortunately my not forced to leave after that. It was (5.2 Richter).

I was at a grocery store with my dad or some similar figure. I'm not sure what we were looking for, we were just there. My dad was telling one of the employees something ridiculous. When he said it, the employee's face slowly turned to anger. He then ran out of the store as soon as possible. I went to get something at my house when I noticed there was always one person riding a scooter in the distance. I also noticed the hair in my eyes. I then gained lucidity and said something about my bangs having a use outside of blocking my vision. The person on the scooter then came up to me and asked me to make a penguin who screams like a piano appear out of nowhere. I tried to do it. I don't know if I did, but he was congratulating me as if I did. I then woke up to write about my dream, but the W key didn't work.

Notes say 'heroes in city', not sure what that refers to. I do vaguely remember some kind of 'time portal' in a wall (an ancient Japanese wall, with gorgeous paintings). There was a soundtrack. At some point Hiro Nakamura shows up (comes back from the past or future), but with prosthetic limbs, and a coffee machine on his head?

Second dream. Dad being a dick again and talking shit about me because the model airplanes I made as a child look like shit in his opinion. He says I'm as lazy as my "good-for-nothing brother". I feel powerless and enraged by it. I fantasized about murdering the shit out of him by ripping off his head. That's what tends to happen when I feel powerless. It's like I become a cornered wild animal. I get really, really mad. I woke up breathing rapidly, still upset. And disturbed by the level of imaginary violence I just unleashed on someone who did nothing to me in real life, and I'm supposed to love.

I'm in a room (in the sewers?), trapped. I look for a key to get out. Eventually I do. Eventually I'm driving a big vehicle (a truck?) through an industrial area closely resembling one of my (many) previous workplaces (tank farm, BASF). Someone sees me. It's my worst enemy from that time, Paul. I try to flee but give up after a short while. Turns out if not him at all, but a female fire safety officer (or whatever the role is called in English, we call it "veiligheidswacht" or "brandwacht). We talk for a bit, then I manage to leave. Back in the sewers now. A man-sized demon sees me. I flee, quickly climbing a ladder to a higher level. I crawl through a narrow space, but my passage through the next small room is blocked by a kind of smaller pig-demon. A fat guy is also stuck in that room. I kill the pig-demon with five shots from my shotgun. I got outside, onto the streets. My getaway driver arrives. The cops are watching from behind the windows of the building next to us. I tell the fat guy (who had a Hispanic name) to hurry up and get in the car before the cops get suspicious.

I was seated at a large table together with many of my former classmates. We were eating sandwiches (pistolets). I specifically remember T. Leyssens.

Long dream, but all I got is mostly forgotten one-word notes. I think I kidnapped the double of the headmaster of the school (a woman) and temporarily locked her up in a closet of sorts. I told her I was going to "make her rich" before I closed the closet door. I think I had some kind of scheme planned out that would make use of her physical resemblance to the headmaster to make lots of cash. I went to tell 'the others'. Including my former boss from work (P. Bosmans), who seemed as skeptical as always.

I was at home (apartment, 4th floor), and my mother was there too. A woman 'rings' the doorbell. I see her face on the screen of that doorbell gizmo of which I don't know the English name. Intercom? She looks like a stereotypical hooker. She orders me to let her in. Or else. She pulls out a revolver, and makes it clear that if I don't let her in, she'll break in and hurt us. I get super pissed off, a shot of adrenaline going through me, and tell her "mine's bigger" (I own an AR15 carbine and Remington 870 shotgun). As I walk towards the bedroom to get my artillery, I tell my mother to call the cops. I open the gun locker, and decide to settle for the Glock 19. It takes forever to get the gun ready, as the law requires the weapon to be unloaded, secured with a trigger lock, and ammo stores separately. As I was messing around with the bullets (my fine motor skills were impaired by the adrenaline rush), I felt like I was fully prepared to kill that woman. The idea that it felt so easy kind of scared me. My plan was to open my bedroom window (which is right above the front door), and give her ONE chance to fuck off. If she tried anything, she'd be dead. Luckily, moments before I could put my brash plan into action, I woke up. Still stiff with real-world adrenaline.

Had a dream involving me going to a dangerous country to help save a young boy who entered in by accident. He was a toddler when he walked on in, but this was a mission given to me a few years later. The country was violent and heartless. It trained the young to be strong fighters and to have hatred in their hearts. I was to go in by faith and try to convert a village of people to a better way of life, while taking the kid back home to his parents. I struggled greatly before I left, because I wanted someone, anyone else to do it instead. Unfortunately there was nobody else suited for the task. There was nobody more qualified.

Not only did I go in not knowing how to accomplish this task, I got thrown into participating in football matches as well, even though I am not a fan of the sport. I am not physically fit, and I barely know the rules of the game. Luckily I was playing against a high school team on a small field. They were using a softball instead of a football. I managed to get a good throw half way across the field and a team mate caught it and got a touchdown. This game went so well I was the designated guy to go filling in on various teams to secure their wins. This was tied to the previous task of saving the child. If I would become a well-known player in this sport, then my opinion would carry more weight, and people who be more prone to listening to what I had to say.


I think this dream kind of touches on my personal life a bit. I am very doubtful of my own skills, yet everyone around me pushes me to do greater things, and when I do I tend to succeed.

I think I was with a really nice girl for a while. Nothing too naughty, just caressing, kissing her all over, etc...

I was doing random stuff, until I noticed I was hovering. I realized this wasn't exactly 'normal', yet I was also convinced this was totally real and I could really fly. I thought, "Neat, let's use it to go visit my mom". She lived in a town called 'Vlimmeren' (she doesn't, that town is where my former gun club is located). Flying low over the streets, I felt like I had to be very careful making turns. I thought this was real, remember, so I figured smacking into a building at high speed because of inertia would cause serious bodily injury. At some point I trail off and apparently forget about my previous objective completely. I go inside somewhere and decide to show off for the people there. I hover through the doors, and show one guy how there's no wire holding me to the ceiling. I decide for some reason to try and burst through the doors at high speed. I put my feet on the wall opposite of the door to get a bit of a push, as I didn't have space to build speed. As I did this, one guy said: "This guy doesn't understand inertia". Whatever you say, DC. Schmuck.

The first dream was an absolutely dreadful nightmare. I was in my apartment, or rather my vision was (I was 'the camera'). My body was in the bedroom, asleep. There was some kind of entity of pure evil in there with me, and the camera just drew closer and closer to it. I couldn't stop it. I couldn't look away. I think the entity was in my bedroom, and the camera followed it there. It all sounds silly, and I barely remember what really happened, other than that it was horrifically scary and made Paranormal Activity look like the Teletubbies.

In the following dream, I was friends with game industry critic Jim Sterling. That was pleasant, I guess?

I found myself laying on some kind of raft, floating on a river of boiling lava. It was pretty clear this was Hell, and that river was pretty clearly the famous Styx. I had to be careful moving around on the 'raft' (the raft felt soft, more like a mattress, blanket or mat instead of a wooden raft) as every compression allowed lava onto its surface, touching my hands/ I actually touched the lava a few times, but it didn't do any damage and it didn't hurt. There was a giant three-headed monster on the shore, eating fleeing people left and right. The people were all dressed very modern and casual, and they looked as confused as I was. No one knew how they'd gotten there, only that this place was awful. The monster is of course based on Cerberus, the monster from Greek mythology that guards the Styx in Dante's Inferno. But this version of Cerberus didn't look like a dog. Its neck was long and serpentine, and its heads looked like the head of a Velociraptor or Tyrannosaurus rex. It was the size of a large house. There were also smaller monsters, I can only call them 'demons'. Vicious critters the size of a man. About the environment... It felt very 'alien'. Not at all like a volcanic environment, as people often think of Hell. This felt more like a lava river on Mars or something. Nothing felt familiar. There was a man with a large camera down there, filming the horrible scenes. I was seeing the scene though his lens, now. Then he got caught by Cerberus. The camera fell to the ground, as the beast gobbled him down in one vicious bite. The camera was on the ground, me still seeing the scene though it. Like in the ending of Paranormal Activity, a ghost-like entity attacked the camera as if it knew I was watching. I was scared half to death.

The next scene appeared to be a continuation of the Hell dream. I awoke in a large room, where others were also waking up. My grandmother (on father's side) was there too. She spoke about getting ready for the "next film", or something? We were doing some weird kind of ritual. A satanic ritual?

This dream was far less pleasant than the last one. I was in what I think was a bar? A certain celebrity I've been obsessed with was there. While I was working up the courage to talk to her, tongue tied and not even sure what to say, I noticed another guy I used to know from work (Nick P.) was already confidently chatting her up. Now, in real life, Nick is someone who's going places. He started his own company. He's smart, driven, stylish, sociable, and therefore all the things I am not. Being confronted with "not being good enough" was humiliating. Can I go back to Hell, please?