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    1. 10 Aug: Meeting friends at parking lot, having sex with a friend at his girlfriend's

      by , 08-10-2019 at 09:02 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      At a place that looks like a campus, with dorms. The dorms are mixed and open space. I am climbing stairs to go to my floor and pass by a floor where I encounter Evangelion. He is sleeping on a chair but somehow with his head upside down and I wonder if he is ok. He wakes up and says he's fine. He just likes to sleep like this. He shows me how he does it and I crack up laughing.
      On another floor I meet Vera who is having a party lunch or dinner with friends and family. Carla also appears there by accident and sees me and stays for a little while just to say hello. She is with a dude and has some kid, but I don't think it's hers.
      Then some crazy looking dude comes in without presenting ID and the security guard goes after him. He then shows him some ID, but then continues in a very fast pace, with a hood over his head, looking very disturbed. He really seems to be up to no good. I go to a parking lot to meet some friends on a car who offered me a lift. They are sitting in a convertible. But the driver is Evangelion and he hasn't yet come join us. I see something shining on the ground and see a few little things, like a porcelain jewel box which is filled with pendants made from teeth and gold decorations. It has a nice amount of gold. I also find other things not as valuable, bur ask Zilla for a bag and collect it all. Some dude in another convertible almost hits me while parking. Then almost hits a pole. Then I see Evangelion coming towards us. We go to his girlfriend's house. I end up on a sofa bed with him watching tv and there is an R rated comedy show playing that ends up with a couple trying to have sex but experiencing some technical difficulties. Then he says something like "why we have never tried to solve our difficulties?" And I ask what he means, since we never got involved like that. And he says that's exactly the difficulty we encountered, but maybe it's time to fix it. Then I realize we are both naked somehow and he slowly comes on top of me and kisses me. He always makes me laugh and he does so by saying "oh goodie, you just brushed your teeth". I remind myself that our friends and his girlfriend are in this house with us, I wonder what he is doing, but guess they are in an open relationship and I am too horny to care.
    2. Saturday, August 10

      by , 08-10-2019 at 07:05 PM
      I am at a tap house or something similar, deciding between a few options. I either decide on a stout or the female bartender just pours one for me. It comes in a small looking glass, almost pitch black. I try it and it is pretty good, not amazing, but enough to remind me of my appreciation for stouts.
      Tags: beer
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    3. Tuesday, August 5

      by , 08-10-2019 at 07:04 PM
      I am either at a concert or watching a video of a concert. I think I am at it, but it is like I started watching a video of it or saw a thumbnail of it on YouTube and then ended up at it. I had been looking through my Watch Later on YouTube, and it was full of Pink Floyd and Doors concerts. I noticed that I had also been watching videos of speeches or someone talking about different topics. This venue has the feel of a warehouse or hangar, airy and dim. The stage and seating riser are long. The Doors are performing, and it sounds like they, and especially Jim, are on top of their game. Jim is animated and fiery. I am now seeing a panorama of the crowd, from the stage, at about stage level. They seem to all be standing and very animated as well. I notice a diversity in skin color. The fashion seems wildly eclectic, possibly 60s, but almost hyperbolically so. There seems to be a good ratio of women to men, many women carelessly or ecstatically topless. The shot pans and lingers on a black man and white woman amid the crowd, the womanís pants unbuttoned and the man casually rubbing her over her underwear. Theyíre standing straight and next to each other, so undetected by only the camera. I find some humor in the shotís slight lingering on this candid exposure of the moment. I now have to use the restroom and end up finding a unisex? bathroom at the end of a hallway. The hallway is slightly ornate, as if in a theater or old house. I think a woman comes out right before I go in, possibly saying something to me. In the bathroom, there is a toilet against the wall and then a ramp up to what looks like a stall. I go into the stall, only to find that the door swings into a position that leaves about a foot long gap. I go back down to the toilet and stand to use it instead. I think it is too low and I aim too high, accidentally hitting the wall at first.
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    4. Monday, August 5

      by , 08-10-2019 at 06:55 PM
      I think I am at work, maybe in the mall? There is a lady at a kiosk or shop with whom Iíve gotten into some kind of verbal altercation. I think it is not unjustified. I am saying something about how itís the worst service Iíve ever received. I think Iím now in some sort of trouble for what Iíve said and/or done, and I have to leave. Iím with Laynie now, and this place looks and seems more like an elementary school. I am not going to leave, and I think sheís aiding me in not getting caught. It is dark out, and I think weíre attempting to stay in here for the night. There is a group of people who I think are walking around, checking for anyone still remaining. Laynie tells me to hurry, and we run out to my? parked car on what looks like the driveway outside of the old 695 house. I unlock it with the remote on my keys and we climb in, her up front and me in the backseat. I lie down and sort of cover myself with blankets. I think itíd still look like a person if they looked in, but hope itís too dark to see that well. At one point I am in the front yard, and it seems very overgrown, but with pretty flowers and grasses.
      Tags: car, house, school, work
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    5. Sunday, August 4

      by , 08-10-2019 at 06:53 PM
      Iím with Laynie, and itís like weíre at work, but right now we are on a street corner. There is a video monitor up on a pole, and Iím trying to pull back video on it. It ends up stopping on just someoneís feet, which we think is kind of funny. I briefly ponder the implications of leaving our recorded video playing for everyone to see. I think itíd be beneficial, but thereís no doubt someone would be offended. I now try to log out, pressing control, alt, and delete. We now cross the street and I see, on the other side of the street, a building that must be our work. It looks low and long, a glossy dark navy/grey, and more organic than not. I notice a sketchy seeming black lady who I think just got dropped off. She hesitates and then enters the building. I look over to Laynie, but sheís noticed her also. We enter the building but stall for a minute so as to give her just a little space initially. Weíve gone to the right and into a room that has a long, grey, ovular table (it may actually be a horseshoe shape, with empty space in the middle) with two men sitting towards the end. There is another video monitor, which I tap with a pen or something, just pretending to be doing something on it. The man seated facing more towards it sees this and chuckles, saying ďkids.Ē I just laugh along with him and his limited perception, his not knowing what weíre really doing. We now enter the Sephora here and see the girl pretty much right away. She notices us also. We are not even near her or overtly watching her when she ends up by us, saying that she feels like sheís being watched. I reply quite lengthily, telling her that there are plenty of other people in here shopping that donít feel like theyíre being watched. I also tell her that Iíve been watched before while shopping but still bought what I was looking for, though Iím not sure thatís actually happened to me. She seems to understand, but still leaves without buying anything. I see her meet up with a white girl who also has a black purse. There is a sort of hallway or foyer between the Sephora and the glass doors to the outside. Thereís then a small bit of pavement before a large, lush lawn. At the end of the pavement, they each throw a pair of shoes or sandals into a trashcan. I notice theyíre both still wearing sandals, so I think they mustíve switched into new ones. I linger in the foyer and notice a black car parked in the shade of some trees near the top of the sloping lawn. The girls double back, but so have I, so that they see me walking past, but not overly suspiciously so.
      Tags: stealing, work
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    6. Saturday, August 3

      by , 08-10-2019 at 06:52 PM
      I am inside what feels like a gas station, kind of like a Maverick. There is a rolling grill containing the typical gas station hot dogs. I look at the two or three different types and their prices. There is a good price for three of them, so I think Iíll do that. I sort of self consciously think about what Iíd look like carrying around three hot dogs with toppings. I now put two each on their own stale looking bun. Thereís a fluid that runs off onto the bun; they look terribly under done, but still I keep them. Now, Caitie comes out of nowhere and, apparently working here, asks to see my ID. Iím not sure if sheís joking or not but, as we walk up to the counter, find out that she isnít. I pull out my ID and give it to her, noticing how long this blue counter is. We talk for a bit and I think sheís really scrutinizing the ID.
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    7. Friday, August 2

      by , 08-10-2019 at 06:50 PM
      I am at work with Laynie. Iím not sure if Iím on cameras or out on the floor, but I notice a lady enter who Iím pretty sure has stolen before. I think she has a black backpack and a large, reusable shopping bag from somewhere else. I tell Laynie, and we start watching her. Almost immediately, it looks like sheís filled the bag with clothes. Two other blond girls, one about younger middle aged like her and one younger, now meet up with her. There are three fitting room stalls along the wall, and they each go into one. After a bit, the other two girls come out. The older one is holding the reusable shopping bag, but for some reason I disregard this. The first girl comes out, and Laynie and I go onto the floor. (It still looks like a retail store, but different than in reality). Iím not sure what weíre doing, since she doesnít have the bag, but we follow her out. I think we then realize that the other girl had the bag. I end up going outside and following them to another store. This store looks like our hallway of kids shoes, but bigger. This girl has met up with an entire family, including younger girls and middle aged men. They all look very similar, even for a family. All are blond or slightly ginger. The two men look sort of aloof and dirty or druggy. It is a little creepy. The younger girl from earlier notices me, asking slightly aggressively ďWhat are you doing here?Ē ďI work here,Ē I tell her defensively. There is attention on me now, and I decide to tell them that I know theyíre only here to shoplift and just need to leave. They actually give it up and head for the door. Though they didnít fight it, I am shocked that an entire family does this so shamelessly. I follow them out and notice a black car with its window down, the reusable bag sitting on the seat. I now start getting aggressive, cursing at the lady while demanding that she give the merchandise back. She only slightly resists, but I do not give, and she ends up taking it out. I think I mentioned that I could just call the cops, which gets her to change her attitude a bit. I think about snapchatting this humorous scene, but donít.
      Tags: stealing, work
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    8. Thursday, August 1

      by , 08-10-2019 at 06:49 PM
      I think I am at work. Yasuko is massaging my back. The massage is deep and she uses a lot of pressure, but it is not uncomfortable. In fact, it is greatly relaxing. She seems to have done it randomly and nonchalantly, but when she is done my body feels better and more flexible.
      Tags: massage, work
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    9. Our Mansion with Amazing Amalgamations

      by , 08-10-2019 at 01:12 PM
      Morning of August 10, 2019. Saturday.

      Dream #: 19,227-02. Reading time (optimized): 3 min.



      This online dream journal entry describes and explains chronological segments from instinctual dreaming, that is, dream exploration and control without so-called lucidity. Such dreams share the same processes, often in the same order towards the waking process. Their content mainly stems from modulatory factors of both (precursory) liminal space and enigmatic space with the usual dream state indicators, vestibular system adaptation, and wall mediation.

      My dream is atypical as it provides two porch settings, one for co-occurrence with liminal space, one for enigmatic space. (Usually, one porch serves as both in an amalgam. Because of that, I mostly only use the typification ďporch as liminal spaceĒ as enigmatic space is tricky to confirm without reasonable evidence.)

      My ongoing dream vivifies with the process of exploring instinctual realization that I am asleep as has occurred every sleep cycle since I was a toddler. I find myself in the Cubitis house (irrelevant since 1978) without my conscious identity. Earl (half-brother on my motherís side; deceased) is sleeping on the floor in my old bedroom with his head oriented toward the door. It is just light enough to see some detail. I have no recall he had died or any recall of ever having lived in Wisconsin at this point (only this Florida setting). There are stacks of books on the floor. Earlís head is close to one small pile of about four books as he is on his left side (as I am in reality as sleep simulacra in dreams typically match my sleeping position). I tell him to be careful about one possibly falling on his head. (This is my subliminal directive to remain asleep, as books require wakefulness to read.) I see the moonlight through the south window and consider the beauty of my room.

      Dream processes progress toward liminal space emergence. There is a vague backstory of having human remains in a small sack (a play on being in bed). They represent the essence of my dream self being ephemeral illusory ďremainsĒ of my waking life identity. It is still nighttime. Regardless of just having been in the house in Cubitis, Florida, I am now on the front porch of the Barolin Street house in Australia. I recall I had placed the remains in the basement but in the open. I also consider I should check to see if there is enough food in the house. I wonder if Earl will need something to eat or drink soon. I soon see bright light shining up through the floorboards. I consider the basement light is on. Eventually, that area of the porch floor (south side) is missing, and I can look down to see one section of the basement. (Note that there was no basement in any house I have lived in, in Australia.) I realize I need to turn the light off, so the public does not see into our basement or start intruding upon that area.

      I go outside and walk around to the back of the Barolin Street house. Nevertheless, I soon reach the front of the Loomis Street house without a second thought. The porch door is erroneously at the south side instead of the front (east). At this point, enigmatic space emerges to a lesser degree. With ambiguity, I consider there may be people active on the street at the front of the house (even though it was the back of the house seconds ago). After I am on the porch, my perception of physicality intensifies. I vividly feel the hook as I fit it perfectly into the eye latch, oriented on the right. (This act is the most vivid part of my dream.)

      I wander around in the basement. I see various packages of food and consider how much effort was needed to place it in different areas. I see many boxes of cereal and packets of potato chips that are almost empty.

      My focus changes. I start thinking that there are two access points at the front of the house, my illusory thoughts again erroneously contemplating the front of the Barolin Street house. However, to the left would be the outside area of the Stadcor Street house. Instead of a basement wall directly in front of me, it is a garage door that opens into the front yard. I falsely recall this is how someone carried the groceries in.

      From here, I step into the lounge room of our present home (W Street). Zsuzsanna says something to me about needing a flashlight (consciousness).