lucid

In which I'm working at my old job...

I'm back at the job that I quit in September. I'm sitting behind a computer in E's classroom reading a non-work related blog. The students are coming in, and E says that I need to walk around and assist them with their work. I feel a little guilty that I had to be redirected. I know better than to waste time at work like that. But when I get up to help the kids, I remember the conflict I had with them and I'm embarrassed to be around them. I start to think about how much I hate the job, and I remember that I've already quit. I ask E why I'm there, and she tells me that I'm dreaming. I become lucid and decide that if I'm dreaming, I can just leave and go somewhere else. But when I walk out the door of the classroom, the dream ends.

In which my uncle and I carve up a dead cow...

I'm at my grandmother's house and my uncle and I are in the kitchen carving up a dead cow for dinner. It's really messy and we are wearing butcher's clothes, including the long, heavy black plastic apron.

In which there is a ghost in my great-grandmother's house...

I'm at my great-grandmother's house, though in the dream she is already dead. I'm in her living room sleeping on the couch, and my uncle is in the armchair nearby, reading. (I think this dream is a continuation of the previous one about the cow carcass though we are at my great-grandmother's house and not my grandma's.) My brother comes into the living room and wakes me up. He tells us that there is a ghost in the back of the house.

We go to the back bedroom which used to be my great-grandmother's bedroom. My brother and uncle ask me if I remember a ghost ever haunting the house before. They want my opinion on the matter because when I was a child, they tell me, I was a spirit-medium and frequently communicated with ghosts. (This is not true in real life, by the way, but in the dream I accepted it as true.) I told them that I did sense a presence of a hostile male ghost.

The bed is pushed up against the middle of the wall of the square room. The wall containing the door to the hall is on the left of the bed. The wall containing two windows facing the street is on the right. The wall containing the closet door is directly in front of the bed, and my great-grandfather's hospital bed is in front of it. On the closet door are stickers of drumming soldiers, partially faded with time. The way the room is set up is accurate to real life, but the stickers are actually in the guest room in real life- not in my great- grandmother's bedroom. I point them out to my uncle and brother.

"Those stickers shouldn't be here," I tell them. "They belong in the front bedroom." We go into the front bedroom to see if the stickers are where they should be, but they are not. I explain that I have only recently found out that our elder uncle B did not put the stickers there. They were there when our great-grandmother bought the house and belonged to the boy who lived here before. I told them that I think that boy's ghost is haunting the house.

They ask me if I think it could be the ghost of either of our great-grandparents, both of whom died in that house. I tell them that this is not possible because they are at peace, not wandering the earth like ghosts. I tell them that I remember feeling the ghost's presence before. That boy is now an angry young man. I explain that this is why my great-grandmother's secret bathroom has been locked up for years. He killed himself in there.

My uncle and my brother seem surprised that I know about a secret bathroom. They ask where it is, and I show them a panel on the wall which can be removed to reveal a door. We open the door and find a tiny little bathroom, so small that a large person could not fit inside. It's a scary place, and we immediately close the door and replace the panel.

Afterwards, I walk over to the two windows and turn the blinds up so that people outside cannot see in. I explain that this will prevent the ghost from entering the house again. Then I notice that there are American flags hung up on the wall between the windows. The flags are mirror image to the way they should be.

"I guess Grandmother couldn't tell that they were backwards," my uncle explains.

me and my brother were going to take over this guys pet shop who was retiring. its a real shop yet in the dream was bigger and packed with all sorts of weird things (sharks, parrots major dream signs). i was walking around town and didnt care i was in a dressing gown and bare feet. i became lucid because of this. i went home by running at an incredible speed then jumping and running through the air along parkway road. i lost a bit of lucidity when my brother failed to make a tight turn on his bike and crashed into some railings. i got home and found jane hall in the shower

Okay so i got on earlier and i decided id post this dream too.
It was a WILD so i entered in the jungle, and heres this lepord and it jumps from this tree like thing idk man.
and it starts talking to me saying i had to be one with the pack and right about now i was going WTH? and then it hit me like a train, I turned into a lepord... IT WAS AMAZING!!!! I felt like i had paws! my heart rate felt slower and i was relly warm... oh boy did it feel great and then a monkey just jumps from a tree and lands on the ground, and i was thinking, Eh im a lepord why not? so i run over there and snap this monkeys neck and the ghost of it flys to heaven. so i sink my teeth into this monkey, and it tasted like lobster, i swear to god it did.
next thing i know dream fades im human again... so the rest of my dream is just me having some fun and i started flying around new york city trying all the cool things ive seen people try to do
so far i got this done in one dream:
Flew, transformed, eat something, jumped off a skyscraper, and went to the moon...

When i went to the moon it was relly weird i saw this guy, he was tall relly tall and i didnt get a good look at him...

in brief... 5 am hubby leaves for work i saw and spoke to him before he left. 6am i am laying in bed half sleep and what i mean by half sleep (my mind was awake but my body won't move) then my mind is tells me 3 times "get up and smoke" which was odd bcuz that never happened before but i continued to lay in bed then i hear a voice asking "do you mind if i lay with you?" still half asleep i moaned mm hmm (yes) then my mind said theirs no one here my son is asleep and hubby went to work. i then try to say no no but i could not open my mouth i could not speak so i moaned mmm mm (no) by this time my mind is trying to wake up my body but it wouldn't move like i was stuck still when i tried to turn my head it felt like my head was being held down finally i forced my body awake (it feels like breaking free from being confined) i turned over and in front of my window inside my apt were eyes it looked like a mask like the ones they wear in mardi gras (not spelled right) orange with yellow. i looked i did not believe what i was seeing so i closed my eyes swished my eyeballs around i thought my vision was a little blurred but when i opened my eyes it was still there (mind you i am fully awake now)i see no body only what appeared to be a mask. i throw the blanket up at what i was seeing and when the blanket came back down it was gone. this is the second time this has happened to me the last time i was a teenager and that time it was the same scene i was laying in bed and i heard a voice whisper my name i could feel the warmth of the breathe on my ear and i answered with hmm. then realized their was no one in the room with me i forced my body awake. if anyone has any helpful thoughts on what occurred plz feel free my co-workers said their is a spirit here and the one thing i should have done but didn't do when i moved here 4 months was get the apartment blessed.

Took some melatonin last night. Just 2mg on if. Had amazing dreaming this morning. I had a fantasticly long and vivid dream. Things i'm proud of that dream for is being able to know where i was sleeping while asleep. Being able to know what time i was supposed to wake up. And naming off all but one in my gaming collection. Anyway here are some fragments.

Lucidity-0
Vividness-5

Brother hands me a blunt. I don't take it right and he gets mad. I get it a little later and cops drive in front of us. They don't notice the blunt and just keep going to do something.

Lucidity-0
Vividness-5

A shark is attacking me. This is related to some sort of video game, but its like a nightmare. Sharks terrify me.

Lucidity-0
Vividness-5

I'm in a video game world. Its a top down rpg i'm pretty sure of. Just general odd things happen. I don't remember much from it but it was crazy fun.

Lucidity-8
Vividness-9

I wake up in my bed. I roll over and start thinking about things. Just random thoughts on what i have to do today, where i have to go, and general daily things. I remember to do a RC in case of FA. No this can't be. This is way too realistic. I get up and look over at the clock. It says its 9:30. I think, "It can't be 9:30, i set it for 7:00". I stare intently at it and the room goes black. I think oh crap i just left the dream. But then i bump into something in the room. I'm still in there.
I go to my laptop. I open it up, type in something i can't remember, and it takes me to funnyjunk.com. I look at some pictures thinking that dream funnyjunk would be great, but its just a bunch of reposted things that suck. I get off of it and walk out the room. I see my golf clubs. I see my moms boyfriend. I think this is a dream, i might as well hurt something while i'm here. I grab a golf club and hit him a few times. But he is a big guy and manages to pin me. Some stupid shit goes on about my ps3, talking about who can play it and stuff. I get let go and walk into my room.
I think why can't i use any powers. I look at the wall and think lightening with my hand extended. Nothing. I keep saying, if i know it will happen it will happen. Still nothing. I think maybe i need to charge myself with some sort of dream energy. I grab a small metal object, open up a wall socket, and stab the metal piece in there. I feel some shock, but nothing painful. I try blasting lightening again. But it still won't work. Damnit i say.
Dream Skip
Me, A DC that i know is supposed to be a friend, and his girlfriend are in an unknown location. Someone comes up and hits his girlfriend. He confronts the person that hit her, but something stops him. Likely the army of people that are with the guy that hit her. I take his back and we start attacking. He grabs a firehose and tells me to touch the end. I grab the end for a second, and fire starts spewing from the hose. I then start to swing the hose around in circular paterns attacking everyone around me. I'm careful not to hit the girl or my friend. People just burnst into flame when it hits them. After a few seconds none of the enemies are left.
Dream Skip
We are going home from the trip. A little kid is driving a very big monster truck as a toy. I think wow this has been an awesome dream. Then wake up due to my alarm that went off at 7:00.

Note: Tonight I had plans to meet up with MoSh to place a connection between his inner world to the Hogwarts we have been visiting, but then he told me that someone has been screwing with Asuka's memory and she doesn't even remember him. So the first plan became to restore Asuka's memory. I also had plans to meet up with Kaomea to raise a bit of chaos in a different Hogwarts, specifically one where Professor Umbridge (5th year Defense Against the Dark Arts Instructor) deserves to be the object of some amusement. More specifically, never can these two dreams meet! Unfortunately, I once again have only fragmented memories.

The Memory Remains
I am with MoSh in a strange town, I have no idea where we are, and I am not lucid. MoSh and I are looking for a new age store where he says he will be able to find Asuka, he says I will have to help her remember him. I am wondering how I am supposed to help Asuka remember him if he can't do that himself. We are heading toward the store, MoSh seems to know where he is going, but we reach a spot where there is a barricade and a cop is not letting anyone down the street we need to take. And they are clearly taking this very seriously, there is a large barrier that is about ten feet tall at least and it is topped with razor wire… um… they are taking this way too seriously. MoSh and I take a different street to go around the barricaded area and get to the new age store that way. Now there don't seem to be any streets heading in our direction at all, and the street we are on is curving in the wrong direction. MoSh points out an alley and we go down that, determined to reach the store. There are dogs there now, about seven big dogs that look like Rottweilers, and they are all blocking the alley and snarling menacingly. I go over to a fire escape and jump to reach the ladder, pulling it down. Now MoSh and I are able to use the fire escapes to get past the dogs. We continue using the fire escapes until we finally reach a store called New Life, MoSh says that is where Asuka is working. The fire escape ends on the roof of the place, which seems a bit odd, but we are able to get inside through a trap door. Inside, Asuka doesn't seem to think this is strange at all, and she greets us by asking what she can help with. I tell her I think MoSh is looking for a bit of quality time with her, adding a wink. She looks at me strangely, as if she has no idea what I am talking about… MoSh says I had said I have a song to restore memories, maybe I should try that. I look in my pocket and find I have my iPod, so I take it out and play the song "The Memory Remains" by Metallica while focusing on restoring her memories. The song plays through, and it looks like there is a flicker of recognition in Asuka's eyes.

Haunted Dungeons
I am at Hogwarts, and this time I am spontaneously lucid, or maybe I just don't recall the time when I became lucid. But at the point where my memories start I am with Kaomea, Fred, and George in some dark corner of the dungeons at Hogwarts. We are all talking about making fools out of Umbridge, Snape, Ubridge, some of the Slytherins, Umbridge… oh, and Umbridge! It is unanimous that every there hates Umbridge beyond all others. Something comes into my mind, I am thinking Kaomea and I can use form shifting to make Umbridge look really retarded, and the effect will last even after we are gone. The situation will be set then for Fred and George to have whatever fun they can get out of it, make a plan? They say they will improvise, that is what they do best. So we start off by sending a fake message from Snape that says he needs to meet with Umbridge immediately. Kaomea and I turn into cats… she turns into Hermione's cat, Crookshanks, I turn into Mrs. Norris. Umbridge comes down into the dungeon shortly later. I, as Mrs. Norris, go over and wind around her legs, which results in her kicking me. I hiss at her. That doesn't fit with all her plates and pictures of cats in her office… but it is also not unexpected. I flip back to my feet, arch my back, and I hiss loudly. Umbridge tells me to shut up, so I start mutating. From the form of a cute little kitty cat I start growing, there are bony spines protruding from my back, and my hissing becomes more malevolent… Before long Umbridge is staring, stunned and terrified, at a face that looks something like this.

She stumbles backwards a couple of feet, then trips and falls on her ass before letting out a horrible sounding scream of pure terror. I hear someone behind me, so I quickly transform back to Mrs. Norris and jump on Umbridge's chest and start purring. Snape enters the hall and sees Umbridge on the floor, cowering, pointing at me and saying to get it away from her, please get it away from her, it's a monster… Snape picks me up by the scruff of the neck and looks at me, he states the obvious, "It's… a… kitty… cat…" in his usual mocking tone. He puts me down and looks at Umbridge with disgust. Umbridge is going on about how I had been a monster just second ago, I respond with a questioning, "Meow?" Snape says, "That's Mrs. Norris, Filch's cat… she may be filthy and have fleas, but she is no monster." Umbridge wants to know what Snape wanted to see her for, he says he doesn't and then walks away. Umbridge is visibly shaken, but then she walks down the hall she came from. I see Crookshanks waiting near the end of the hall, Kaomea is going to have some fun with Umbridge. I head down the hall towards them, to see what is going to happen, but this is the last part I remember.

A whole LOT of dream time this night, maybe 3 hours. I got to sleep on time but was tired.

I also think my dreams have been influenced by the news events lately, I have to stop watching the news...

Dream 1 : Teaching My Dog and Cat to Hunt.
Nonlucid
I was out in my backyard and the dog and cat were back there sniffing the ground and stuff as usual but then I saw there was a rabbit between them but they didn't seem to see it! I ran out into the yard and called them over to the rabbit and said "go get it!" a few times. After a bit they got the idea and started to chase it. They caught it and just stood there with their heads down like they were biting at it or something.

Dream 2 : Pink Shirts and Bomb Making
This is a very long dream which I will shorten to get to the best parts.
Partial lucidity
I was coming out from an alleyway and there were a lot of shops here along the street but they were closed and had a strange chain-link type of fencing over them. It was on a small hill and i walked down the hill to a parking lot where it leveled off. I looked at some of the cars here and then an old Italian American type guy came up to me and started asking things about my interest in the car. I was not at all interested in him OR the car and said "no thanks" and walked off.
There was a shop nearby which I walked into and people were sorting electrical stuff from these hand sized bins. I walked around pretending I worked there but really just exploring.
Then I noticed this guy on a step ladder had a pink shirt and black tie. I was taken back by that, and though I said nothing, they heard my thoughts. The guy with the pink shirt looked down at his shirt and looked annoyed and then somehow ripped his shirt off single-handedly tie and all. Then I saw three more guys behind him, also wearing the same things, do the same.
As I walked around I watched them all working but one guy seemed to be sneaky and I thought he was trying to put together parts to make a bomb. I followed him to his work station but the parts there could never make anything much less a bomb.

Dream 3: Taking Down the School
Lucidity was maybe 80%. I knew it was a dream but my mind was not focused clearly.
I found myself in a school. At first I was not sure where I was and had to walk around to get a feel for the place. Every place has a feel for what it is. I was in a middle school office. It was a large office with a big section for seating and kids to play on the floor. A couple of middle schoolers sat in the seats while about 4 younger kids played on the floor. I walked around and got a feeling there was a hostage situation. I didn't get how that could be, the dream world almost never has a staged one time event like that, usually ongoing events that anyone can join at any time and fit right in. Still no one was leaving the school at all so I decided to take a look around.
While contemplating what I wanted to seem like (whether I wanted people to see me as a teacher, school administration, a visitor, or even a student) two boys walked by with one hanging onto the hoody of the one in front of him trying to walk away. Bullying! I stepped out the door and said "You two! In here." and they meekly walked inside the office area. Another office woman came up behind me and said "thanks" smiling. I could feel that she thought I was a teacher so I figured that's what I'll be.
I walked around and around, through halls and rooms, sometime they paid me attention sometimes not but no one seemed to feel like there were hostages anywhere so I took the long walk back up to the front of the school. I sat in a office across the way with those window-walls where the top is glass and the bottom is a very short wall. I thought if I could make all the windows break then everyone would have a reason to leave and then at least if there was a danger they would be safe. I used my telekinesis to pull on the windows but they didn't break or even rattle. This was really weird, actually impossible, how come the windows were resisting my powers without even trying? So I tried again even harder this time, still nothing. Then I noticed there was a door, and part of its doorway, that had warped towards me. No one noticed the door or my gesturing, I needed to do more, much more. I pulled hard on the door and everything around it, then looked. The door was way out of shape and the ceiling was bending down and towards me and still no one was noticing me as I sat amongst other people in this office. I went all out, using two hands I telekinetically pulled a huge amount of the building, bringing the ceiling way over and half the school and it was beginning to look like it may collapse as there were snapping and cracking noises! I didn't want to become a victim of my own success so this damage would have to do but no one noticed a thing. This is not strange since dreamers usually don't notice anything is strange till they wake up, just last night I dremn't of serving lunch in a shoe and thought nothing about it. I would have to start something, so I got up and said "We have to leave!" while thinking about the ceiling caving in. Three people noticed me and turned their heads as I spoke. They started leaving and then other followed them, we were all headed out! I held back from the doors a bit, the trouble makers should not be the first one out. I just thought they might know me or what I did; when your lucid you find it hard to think that others are not. On my way out the door I tried to hold the door for others but there were people who felt they were in charge doing that and the administrative type holding the door didn't let me hold it so I walked with the others. Everyone was grouping up outside like during a fire drill which is what it felt like and I felt that most people thought it was. I stood by a couple of women at the far end of the school and feeling pretty good about my mass exit I decided to say "wow they did a great job [getting everyone out] didn't they?" They agreed and one woman in a slight German accent said "yes." I looked at the side of the school and it was straight not bent over like I thought it should be.

I found this website yesterday, after finding a wikipedia page on lucid dreaming.
I thought wow, this sounds amazing. [Ended up signing up today]

So I researched further.. techniques on how to become lucid, reality checks, things you can do everyday to help you further.

I found something that said it's harder to WILD at night.
But me, being over-excited, decided to try it anyway.

So I lay in bed, dead still, for maybe 15 minutes, and bam.
I got what I think was the 'wave' I read about.

But I thought, isnt there supposed to be a urge to move?
So I thought, na, I won't give up yet.

I think another 10 - 15 minutes later, is when I wanted move. Badly.
After it subsided, I was relieved, but nothing was happening.
I got that urge maybe 5 - 10 minutes after, again.

After that subsided I lay there, unmoved, relitivtly calm, for another 10 - 20 minutes.

But that's when I gave up, and decided to move, and go to sleep.


Then I was having dream, but I didn't realise at first because although I was in some sort of indoor-camp-playground place. I thought I was supposed to be there.

I can't remember much, but I remember controling what I was saying to someone.
That's when I kinda realised.
So then I thought of "reality checks".

I remembered one being looking at your hands, so I did.
My left hand had two extra fingers on the left side, and another two on the right side.
My right hand looked like, it had that photo-booth yin-yang-swirly effect on it. They were both a bit blurry.
I started becoming very happy, but not over-excited because I heard that can wake you up.
I made one more reality check.. by pinching my nose, and blowing.. the air some-how went straight through.

Now this was pretty amazing to me..
but I didn't have much control, like I've read,
I would also say it was "bad quality"
It was unclear what everything was about, the things around me as well, I do remember there being individual people, but it's all blurred together now trying to remember.
Other than the hands, and the basic idea of where I was, I can only remember snips, small snips, and even they are hard to explain.
I know it happened, I just.. can't remember.

That's my first experience with lucid dreams.

Non-dream Dream Lucid-Dream


This was a lucid nightmare I had last night. I thought It was pretty interesting so I'm going to post it here.

I was walking around a mall. The mall was HUGE. I suddenly became lucid. I was walking around looking at how real everything was, I walked to the end of one of the aisles and came up to a big window. I looked out the window and saw a bunch of trees. Almost looked like a jungle out there. I saw a black thing in the distance. It started getting closer... oh no, oh god no, It was slender man.

I freaked out. he was coming at me on all is tentacles. I started backing away, not knowing what to do. He rammed his whole body through the window with a thrust of his tentacles. He was coming at me. I kicked him right in his fa-... Oh wait. He has no face. I kicked him in the front of his head as hard as I could. The dream faded, suddenly I was in a new dream, I was still lucid. I was in the passenger seat of a car and some one else was driving. We were out in the desert. about 50 slender mans were roaming around. I was kind of terrified. The dream faded there.

12.01.10

So I slept from about 3:30 'till 7:00, shared breakfast with my mother, read haiku and reviewed my DJ and goals after a shower and tea, then at 9:30 I return to bed and sleep until 12:30

3:30-7:00 Dreams
Dream of a man [which I fade in and out of perspectives] swimming in turbulent ice cold water near a cornered wooden dock, trying to retrieve an object fallen in the water of apparant great importance [grasping] He gets so close and then the dream fades. The scene switches to an army-esque situation with a bunch of men sitting in uniform in the back of a tan truck. Tom Hanks stands up and starts to talk directed at me, the man he saved apparantly "I had my papers and was all packed up ready to ship out, then this fat idiot here comes along [and I wind up saving him] so here I am now today.. I even read this damn book of yours too.. First one in 12 years." [apparantly he had been dismissed before and this meritious action got him his title back?]

Similar fragment travelling underground in a huge square tunnel constructed out of sandstone bricks, some other sort of army experience involving prisoners.

Fragment of a video game shopping mania! In some generic looking superstore like K-mart, and see hundreds of SNES and oldschool console games lined in white wired baskets.. I experience a mixture of seeing and also experiencing various facets of playing and being a character in many different games like donkey kong, kirby, megaman.. very cool actually.

9:30-12:30 Dreams
I wake in my bed and do a noseplug RC and it succeeds and I verify that I am dreaming. I repeat slowly and steadily to myself that I am dreaming. I walk downstairs and am in a house I used to live in.. in the kitchen is a boy named Ben that I was friends with during the time that I lived at the house. He sees me arrives downstairs and immediately walks out the back glass door without saying a word to me. I walk outside onto a short wooden deck, and Ben has walked up a sloping hill and walked behind a tree, kind of watching me from the shadows of the far side of the tree. Two dogs, one long haired with white brown and black colors and a slender face, the other completely white are trotting towards the woods and I consider following them but do not with to enter the woods at that time. Instead I tun to my left and climb up another steep hill on all fours, soaking in the remarkable texture of the grass and slight dampness of the soil beneath. Over my shoulder I hear Ben call out "HEY!" kind of like saying "Where are you going?" but at this point I forget my intention to ineract with DCs and ignore him, the call is far off sounding anyway and I assumed he would've only distracted me [from doing what exactly I'm not sure]. I get to the top of the hill and get into a hot tub. From a nice colonial style house a woman in a bathing suit comes running out toward me calling my name. A she comes toward me I try to transform her into a different character which vaguely succeeds, as my dream fades away.

At this point I am in what I believe has been labeled "the void", a transitioning point between dreams.. I hold onto my awareness in the dark, and focus on the fact that I am dreaming and another dream will arise. I open my eyes in my own bed and RC successfully and find I am still dreaming. I get up and go to leave my room as I did in the last lucid but my heavy oak dresser is halfway blocking the door, and I cannot open it. I take this as a sign. I slow down and stop trying to move and explore, I notice that my wall is completely covered from top to bottom in art works done by my sister who is a terrific artist and also my own drawings and paintings, most of them framed in black matte paper. I feel cold without a shirt so I open my closet and put on a long sleeved shirt while laughing at myself for layering up in a dream. I decide the dresser is a test for me to pass through walls. So I focus my concentration on walking through the wall, and visualize the space on the other side of it, and successfully walk through it with absolutely no resistance! I didn't even feel the wall at all. The bathroom light is on in front of me.

I look to my right and strangely enough there are two other Me, sitting infont of a balcony on a blue couch slightly lowered into the ground like a theatre. The two Me are just looking at me, and [I guess since I had "Bad Romance" stuck in my head for whatever reason earlier in the day] I think of dancing and start singing Bad Romance, and the other two Me also start to get down still sitting on the couch! haha! So we're all dancing together and that's very fun, I consider going over and actually dancing with myself breifly but am still focused on mastering passing through walls. I look back at the wall to my room and intentionally fail passing through just to see what that feels like, and I just kind of run into it.. doesn't hurt, bounce back a bit. Then I actually focus on passing through and this time run right through it.

At this point the dream fades and I have another FA, this time brief and I don't recognize it. I imagine my phone going off [and it looks completely accurate, even the numbers and background and the song]. I'm recalling all the dreams I've had in detail in my bed and then I'm suddenly sitting at breakfeast with my father who is talking loudly and it annoys me since it becomes harder to concentrate.. then another FA where I look at my phone and a website similar to DV is on the screen on my browser. I close the tab and the phone says I still have ten minutes till my alarm goes off... I fall back asleep then feel myself sink into my physical body.

Funny thing though - halfway through writing in my DJ I realize that the phone check may have been a FA, so I look at my phone and it says that I still have 10 minutes left before the alarm goes off.. totally weird huh? Just like the last FA.

After this I sleep again for another 90 minute cycle, and have a non-lucid that feels like it lasted for about 30 full minutes with almost no lapse in conciousness, and with complete recall. Longest dream I've recorded yet.

I also had another lucid yesterday during a nap, though it was very vague in my memory when I woke up, very little lucidity just walking through rooms alone. Had an FA I failed to recognize, though I was very suspicious the whole time and was investigating my surroundings intently and even tried to fly [crashed on my head hahah] but didn't believe I could. I was looking at the room for physics defying features and didn't find any, but failed to notice that the elevation of the second floor was only like a half floor, and that the main room was incredibly larger than it actually is though all the furniture was still there.

These lucids I've recorded here were MILD induced nap/WBTB. I also have been practicing with WakingNomads meditation technique given to him by his DG Zaphor involving cycling the power between your three states [astral dream and physical] while also adding my own twist of cycling and balancing the energy between the three dream states [lucid, non-lucid, deep sleep] within that outer circle. It has enabled me to feel my energy body as a distinct entity for the first time. Salutations to Zaphor!

So yup. Awesome. Seeing myself in dreams was really a fun experience. When I see myself again I will remember to place priority on interacting with myself.
Hope everyone had a great holiday and fabulous lucids!

[This is a catch-up post. These dreams are from the night of November 18-19, 2010.]

Awake, Non-lucid, Lucid, [Commentary made while awake]

I'm in a theater, watching a film that turns out to be really scary and disturbing. The film begins with one Congressman sitting behind his desk in his office, while another is standing in front of his desk, calling him out on his shenanigans. The one behind the desk dies of a heart attack a few seconds after the one standing up finishes ranting. The ranter then starts an investigation of the one who died.

At this point, the film's narrator says, "The more he found, the more he refused to see." The Congressman performing the investigation stays in one place [I think it may have been the dead one's office, but I'm not positive] for such a long time that he eventually survives by cannibalism. One of the things he finds while investigating is a bag of marijuana, which he goes through, looking for cigarette butts. At the end of the film, there is a message from his family, left in vinyl-cling letters on the window: he got out and is now getting help.

The film ends, and I exit the theater and walk down the long flight of wide steps leading up to it. The theater is located inside Disneyland. [I've been having dreams featuring bizarre versions of Disneyland since I was a child, but this one really takes bizarre to a new level.] It's a beautiful, sunny afternoon. I walk through Fantasyland and into Toontown; the two share a long, open border with each other, with no transition point or hard line of demarcation between them. Riding on a moving walkway, I go past a turnaround mechanism for the Skyway - the big wheel that keeps the cable with all the buckets attached to it moving and allows the buckets to turn around and go back the other way. It is at ground level. The cable is there, has buckets attached to it, and is moving, but there's no loading/unloading station there, just the turnaround mechanism, all by itself.

I walk past Mickey's house. The path through Toontown dead-ends into a section of the queue for the Roger Rabbit ride. I decide I might as well stay there and get in line, now that I'm there; it was only about 4:00 P.M. the last time I looked at the time, so I have plenty of time to enjoy myself. [D'oh! Should have RCed.] I get in line, walking through an opening into the enclosed, indoor space where the queue is. I walk past a group of Cast Members who are singing a barbershop-quartet rendition of "Stray Cat Strut." I wait for them to finish, then tell them that I know where I'm supposed to go to get to the back of the line, and I'm not taking cuts in the line. They understand and let me pass. One of the Cast Members lets me get in line in front of him. This puts me in line directly behind Gary Coleman and some other little people. We introduce ourselves to each other politely; he goes first. I realize that I'm dreaming just as it's ending, when it's too late to do anything; I can already feel my real body.

I'm at a high school, in a room that has chairs in it, but no desks (possibly the drama classroom). One DC is talking at great length to a group of other DCs on the subject of her facial reconstruction surgery. I pull up a chair, joining the group, and listen. I introduce myself to the DC who has been talking. As we're shaking hands, she introduces herself to me as Anne-Marie. She says that she's ugly, and I automatically answer, "No, you're not." [She reminds me a little bit of real-life friend Dawn B. from college, now that I think of it.] She has dirty-blond hair in a ponytail, pale skin, and sunken, brown eyes. She has a black eye on one of them. I know nothing about her appearance is her fault, though, and I like people to be happy with themselves, so that's why I told her she wasn't ugly. In reply to my denial that she's ugly, she says, "Oh, are you another furry?" I answer, "No, but I am an anime fan." I know that she's an anime fan, too. We chat a bit more, and the conversation ends with our agreeing to eat lunch together.

At the end of the conversation, I have another “Oh, yeah, I'm dreaming” moment. The realization comes easily and naturally, the only specific trigger being that I'm in an unfamiliar place. [I had been MILDing again, so when I found myself lucid dreaming, I accepted and realized it readily because it was what I was expecting.] I take a look around. The classroom is irregularly-shaped, high-ceilinged, and sunlit from skylights. Visual clarity is good. I get down on the floor to feel the carpet, which is short, institutional, and gray. I start crawling on the carpet through the room, remarking to myself aloud: “I don't have any energy today. It's my own fault; I should have gone to bed earlier.” My dream body feels just as tired and sluggish as I know my real one does at this early hour of the morning. I've never experienced this in a lucid dream before, so I find it strange, so I comment on it and come up with a logical explanation for it.

“Why am I wearing this heavy backpack, anyway?” I say to myself, because, I realize, I am wearing one. It feels just like the ones I carried in junior high and high school, so it must be full of textbooks. I take it off, one strap at a time, and let it roll off my back and onto the floor. “That's better... a little,” I say. I can feel the absence of its weight, and I feel a little less tired, but not totally back to normal.

There is a full-length mirror on one side of the room. I stand up and go to look at myself in it. My hair is wavy again, and this time, it reaches all the way to my waist. “Oh, cool!” I say. “That's so pretty! I've always wanted it to be like this!” [While it certainly was pretty, I know very well that actually having hair that long would be really impractical... but, yeah, there evidently is a part of my mind that misses having long hair.] I'm wearing a bright sky-blue T-shirt with pink hearts and gold and silver swirls and sparkles on it, and a long, blue denim wraparound skirt. While looking at my reflection in the mirror, I reach for the outer flap of my skirt with my hands and try to touch it, but I can't feel anything there. When I look down at the skirt itself and try again, though, I can feel it. [That's a pretty cool and interesting difference between dreams and reality, and more (anecdotal) evidence that whatever you concentrate your direct perception on, your mind works harder to create.] I woke up after that.

well i was just messing around outside in the garden and for want of a better expression me and my family were being dicks. this partly made me realise that all wasnt quite right here, and when i looked at my surroundings closer i became lucid. this was one of those completely lucid indistinguishable from real life ones, where all your senses are as they would be in reality. i looked around and said wow weve done something amazing here guys. of course no one knew what i was going on about.

as it was so vivid i thought well perhaps these people may be more than just dream characters, anyway it felt like it was worth checking. my immediate thought was to pick somebody who may be the likeliest one to remember such things. i chose an old family friend, probably because i have tried and failed with members of my family before. i staballised the dream by rubbing my hands on a small wall in front of me. the woman was over the other side of the wall and i very calmly looked into her eyes and said something listen what we are in is a 100% lucid dream. now even if nothing comes from this shared dreaming wise, it was stilll a very useful learning experience for me, as i got to see from the other side some of the things that may have scared me in dreams before and how silly it is to fear it.

she looked back at me in amazement at first as i held her hand. then she backed away slightly and said why me? i said something like its not just you its all of us, and tried to calm her fears. as iwas doing this everyone started crowding round and i could see this was worrying her. this has also been one thing that has really put me off having deep dreaming experiences because its scary to have everyone crowd round like that and be the centre of their attention. even though theyre motives seemed harmless i urged them not to crowd so much and this calmed her and she started to slip into the experience. she just had this big relaxed smile on her face and she slowly lay down on her back and seemed to be in a heightened state of physical pleasure. she just kind of dropped off to sleep while gently rocking and smiling as if it was some kind of psychadelic experience for her. this is where it kind of faded for me and i just left her to enjoy the dream.

who knows eh if it was part of a shared dream and she gets in touch then great, but either way i learnt alot and will be far less fearful the next time someone tries to teach me out of my comfort zone in a dream

Lucid
Dream1: Uncles Will
I become aware that I am in someones driveway standing next to an old white car (1970's type maybe). I've never seen this house or car before. A man comes to me and starts talking. I really don't care because although he may look like my uncle he's more than likely just a dreamer* and besides the dream world is much more interesting. He continues to talk to me as I pay him no attention and start exploring. I see some potted plants and pick one up to take a closer look, some of these dream environments can be so intricate. It looks like a poorly taken care of bonsai tree with a pool of water in its pot. I look up across the back yard, beside us and the car, and wonder what it all looks like and then I fly up and very very slowly flying towards the street. As I do I look down, I'm not up too high at all and I take the planter I still have and pour the water down to the ground where this guy (still talking) and his stuff is. This is fascinating to see how I am flying, back to the sky face down, and the water falls down to the ground and splashes. My supposed uncle is not happy now and starts saying he is going to leave me out of his will and that I am not going to get this silver pitcher he has placed down onto the cement driveway. I get really angry at his cheap attempt to insult me and control me with these paltry trinkets. I fly down to the ground and go over to his little silver pitcher and say "you can take your pitcher" then I kick it into his car "and shove it up your ass!" He looks at me completely shocked, his eye wide and his mouth hanging open. I just stood there waiting for whatever he had to say to that.

Nonlucid
Dream 2 fragment: The 10 Story High School
I am running around in this huge HS. I've been here before and realize that I am not a student here but seem to have some important stuff to run around and do. My female friend (not from real life) tries to keep up with me as I run around trying to figure something out. Its hard for her to keep up since I am the only one flying or sliding down stair handrails (the school is very crowded and it seems everyone is ALWAYS on their way to class so I use the handrails as a short cut).
I've been to this school 4 times before but in the past it was much more detailed and partially lucid.


During a nap today (45 min).
I had 2 dreams both nonlucid and both as if I was viewing a TV show.

Dream 3: After School Show
It was a crappy kids show where the actors are lame and so's the acting. I wished it was over and the ending came as they all came together and sang a lame ending song about how they all get along and play fair. I marveled at how 28 year olds could play 16 year olds and still be on TV every day.

Dream 4: Cooking Show & Shoes
This was a cooking show like Rachel Ray but for kids with the same "its a cooking show but we do a lot of non-cooking things too" theme. The girls on the show where preparing lunch which for each of them (4) was different. The leader of the show then said "now lets use our place-mats!" They then put their bowls and cups into the foot hole in shoes! Each shoe pointed in the other direction but side by side with the food sticking out of the shoe or ever fluffy bedroom slippers. They then carried them from the kitchen to the circular table.
I woke and was like "wtf?" Not only were the shoe place-mats weird but the fact that I didn't think it was weird in the dream!


* I refer to DC's as dreamers a lot because I see them as people dreaming wondering the dream world. They act out living at home, being at work, or whatever they usually do. These dreamers are different than what I call "replicants" these are characters created by my mind and are linked to me by my attention. The difference is one is a real person sleeping at home and the other is a drem't up facsimile of a person, animal, or thing. I can sometimes feel the difference between them but the real test is to take your attention away from them completely and then see if they are still there. If they are gone they were a replicant. This has helped me a lot since I would always wined up looking for something I just had since as soon as I took my attention away it was not there any more.

Dreamers can vanish as well but usually under extreme emotional stress. Rarely I have caught them vanishing while interacting with them but just before they do they stop talking, or whatever, and look like they have just remembered something. The next instant they are not there. There's no "poof" or nothing just vacancy. It's a bit of a shock to NOT see someone in an instant.

November 23, 2010

Lucid Dream

AWAKE DREAMING LUCID SIDENOTES

This was on a night where I wasn't actually trying to induce a lucid dream. Funny how that happens. Also this happened after I absent mindedly turned off my alarm, and I slept thirty minutes or so after I was supposed to. I had school that day. This all happened inbetween 6:00 AM and 6:31 AM
I was in my old house in the basement. Somebody I knew from school was there and I said hi. It didn't hit me as hard as it usually does but I was then lucid after meeting my friend. On impulse, I decided to start flying. It took little effort to do this. The way I did it though was by looking at the ground and gently jumping, and gravity had no effect on me anymore. I then floated up the stairs hugging my mother who was walking up the stairs, until I floated over her. I went into my living room and did a breast-stroke through the air. It was so fun. Then I remembered what I wanted to do in a lucid when I got the chance: focus on something to see if it gets really clear. So I looked at my laptop's screen. An image began to form and then it became so sharp in focus that I could even see the individual pixels on the screen. It was unbelievable. I was only soon after that it resulted in me waking up.

Note: My plans for this night included meeting MoSh to have another dream in a Harry Potter world, and I also had plans to meet up with Tigress and have a dream about fighting zombies. Unfortunately, my recall is just barely on the happy side of CRS (Can't Remember Shit). So after the dreaming, all I have to show for it is these fragments. I was spontaneously lucid in both of these, or maybe I just don't remember becoming lucid.

Hogwarts 2000 Race
I am with MoSh at Hogwarts… we are all outside on the hill that we were at when we practiced our patronuses. MoSh, Asuka, Harry, Ron, and Hermione are there with me. Ron is being really rude, he is saying he doesn't want any filthy Slytherins here, Hermione is telling Ron how immature he is being, so shut up. Ron finally shuts up about me being there, then MoSh is wanting to have some kind of competition with Harry. After a bit of discussion they end up deciding on a race. So we all go into the castle to fetch some brooms, Harry says unless MoSh has his own broom, they can both use school brooms so it would be even. MoSh summons a broom, Harry gets his Nimbus 2000, and we go back to the hill. The course is set, and they both take off. Ron wants to go up on a broom of his own to watch the race from a better view, Hermione is apparently afraid of heights, I decide to see what it feels like to be riding a broom, so I summon one and fly up with Ron to watch Harry and MoSh race. The two of them are racing along the agreed course, and they seem to be pretty close, but then MoSh apparently decides the broom is more of a hindrance than a help. Harry does a double take as he sees MoSh's broom fall, yells out MoSh's name, apparently thinking MoSh is falling, then pulls a very good Homer Simpson (staring with a blank expression on his face) as he sees MoSh continue flying without the aid of the broom. Harry continues the race, but now MoSh is going faster than he was before, and Harry is already behind. So the distance between them only grows until MoSh crossed the finish line. I land next to MoSh and Hermione, Ron is also pulling a very good Homer Simpson, he is still floating in the air on his broom. Hermione is congratulating MoSh on his win, but she stops mid sentence when she sees he has no broom… now she is pulling a very good Homer Simpson with the others.

Resident Evil: The Dark Side
I am with Tigress in an abandoned looking town that reminds me of Silent Hill, though it reminds me of Silent Hill on the lighter side. There is a lot of fog and stuff, but aside from being a bit dark and dreary, it is a normal looking small town. Tigress and I are looking through the town, we both have an array of weapons strapped to us, I know we are looking for zombies. I hear the sound of gunfire and turn to see Tigress has taken out a zombie. I blast a zombie off to my left with my shotgun as it comes out of the space between two of the buildings. Tigress and I continue exploring the place, but then things begin to change… I hear a strange noise, a sort of squishing noise like might be heard when pulling something out of the mud… or maybe the sound that might be heard from a swarm of bugs and maggots in a pile of rotting flesh… I know that is gross, but I don't know how else to describe the sound… Along with the sound, the surroundings are changing. The buildings are actually decaying, the tops of them are getting covered with a gross looking green stuff that looks like mold, which is spreading down the buildings. As the buildings decay, several of them start to collapse. The mold stuff spreads to the ground and across it, leaving a really gross looking surface. And as the decay spreads, so do the zombies. Not just a couple, but lots of them, so many of them. Tigress and I are firing our weapons on rapid fire now, a shot gun is too slow, I choose a different weapon and start cutting them down. We are completely surrounded by zombies, but if we can't hold them off, we will take a shitload of them with us!