lucid

Uncharacteristicly insane dreams from me today. Recall and lucid thinking were pretty bad though. Mostly just sort of semi-lucid but red was the most vivid. I remeber the first dreams as a mish-mash of scenes.

Action At My Aunt's House (dild + deild)

First, I became lucid somehow and I was at my aunt's house. I took off all my clothes which might sound odd but was quite liberating. Maybe even helped with dream control because it reaffirmed I was dreaming. I effortlessly fly into the air but see a TV with a beach on it. Now is my chance to try teleporting and maybe even go surfing. I dive into the TV. I lose all vision but play dead. I re-enter the same dream.

I fly into the air again to confirm I am dreaming and I see a friend. We talk about lucid dreaming and he said we are sharing a dream or someothing. He can see me from the real world and I'm naked. I fall to one knee and yell "What am I doing? Can you see me?" He knows the answer. I contest. You are probably a computer. YOu know the location of my knee on the axies in space.

Another scene forms, my friend turns into a naked women and we just sort of run around eurphoricly like we are in the Garden Da Vida (that is in the bible, right?). Well, I fell on top of this women and things take a turn....but nothing happens because I lose vision but again play dead and re-enter the same dream.

Another scene emerges. I walk down past the house and 4 cop cars come blaring up the drive way. "Finally! Some action!" I yell and my friend is back. WIthout hesitation I throw I huge arching fireball and blow the first car to smithereens. Monsters, not cops, get out of the cars and run at us. I use a vocal yell to use the Insect Swarm from Bioshock (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2OE4jjNA89g). I throw bees from my arm at them. At first only a few bees but the second time is a swarm and I even hit my friend by mistake. I drive all the monsters away but the leader. He just slwoly walks towards me with a serious look on his face and I can't stop him. I don't know how. I fly up and over the house into the yard where another scene happens.

There is a guitarist there with a weird wireframe grid on his guitar. He said it is to micro his guitar better. Something happens and I get into a fight with my friend. He charges. "Real world rules only!" The guitarist yells. I uppercut my friend and he gets knocked into outer space. Quite literally.

I wake up into an FA. Final scene, I walk downstairs and see DogW and a dead version of her. I continue into the kitchen where M and my aunt are cooking. There was nother FA where I was talking to my friend about taking notes.

Juggernaut (non-lucid)

I'll make this vivid dream quick. I am in some sort of warehouse with old high school friends. I was running from a guy that tried to kill me. Poison me or something. This guy tries to sell a big bag of lettuce as weed. When my friends look away, he places some poison weed inside. I tell them about it. "Don't smoke that!". They try to turn it into a cop but he shoots and kills them. This dealer guy pursues me. I sneak around the warehouse and hope over stone walls.

I see this huge 8 foot 500 pound guy running through the stone walls. I cower int he corner hoping he doesn't see me. He is being pursued as well. "Turn yourself into these guys." he tells me. "Yeah. Ok. Anything. You just keep going." Vomit-like pours from his mouth. He turns and runs. Turns to me one last time and the vomit is gone. He smiles.

I like to think I recruited this man as my dream team ally. He is the tank, obviously.

In the first dream I was apparently at school with the band, but it was last year's band. I was sitting with V and A. We were all talking and getting out instruments ready.

Then I had a LD. I don't remember how it started, but I was at the ranch at first. I was strolling around, not really thinking about what to do. I saw a girl with a chubby and sturdy white horse that had a pink jacket. I asked her what the horse's name was, and she said it was "Rascal."

I then saw K. I decided to try to tell her that we were dreaming; I wondered what would happen. I told her that we were, and to my surprise, she scoffed at me. She got mad and told me to do something else. I shrugged and wandered off to do other things. I can't remember what else I did, but the dream lasted fairly long.

Then I was at school. We were preparing for a dance in the gym. Everyone was getting changed. I only had this ugly black dress that was really shiny but made with cheap material. It was short and had one of those stupid bands on bottom, which made it totally shapeless. I was annoyed that I couldn't have brought anything nicer.

The school suddenly turned into a rec center. I wanted to quickly take a shower before I dressed, but among the many washrooms and changeroosm I couldn't find one with a shower. Every room had a label that said "changeroom" and then beside it a class from D2. I found some asian guy who seemed to be the janitor and asked him for a changeroom with a washroom. He said they were closed as he showed me a schedule for the changeroom cleaning. I thanked him and took the map. Then I realized that I had asked for the washroom, not the shower. I shook my head in frustration. How could I be so stupid?

As I looked back at this schedule map thing, I saw that "changeroom - assassin" had a shower in it, as so did "changeroom - druid" (but I assumed that that one was the male changeroom). I quickly rushed over. I saw a few of my friends along the way.

Then, in the next dream, I was watching this glowing bug thing. It left a trail in the night sky. I can't even really remember what happened, but I was watching this bug-flower thing leave colorful trails everywhere, and I was following it. I also remember looking at the sky (it was night time) and thinking how I would like to jump up and see the stars closer. I briefly remember seeing SA somewhere.

*Lucid Dream and Dream Fragment*

I found myself in a purple midst. I couldn't really tell where I was. When I found out I was in a dream, I decided to find my DG. I yelled out, "Do I have a Dream Guide?!" Someone behind me replied, "Yes, yes you do." I turned around to see a blurry vision of a girl. Then, I woke up.

*This LD was kind of special*

lucid dreams: 7-22-10

I have been having trouble remembering my dreams lately, so I can only recall fragments.


Short Lucid Fragment

In one dream, I was talking to someone who I think was important. Actually, they were talking to me. I was lucid the whole time, but just sat there and listened. The background was a blue sky, and we were up in the clouds. I wish I could remember what was being said.


Mr. Echo

I think this dream might have been a lucid one since I wanted to wake up from it..

I fell back asleep using the FILD method, which actually works really well. But when the dream opened, Mr. Echo from the television show Lost showed up. For some reason, I was really scared of him and didn't want to see him or talk to him so I tried to wake myself up again. He said something like "no.. wait!" but it was too late.I was drifting in and out of the dream. Finally I decided to return to the dream but I just couldn't get back to it.

Dream Fragments, some Lucid, some not

Several times I would realize these weren't real, but I decided to not mess with it because it was entertaining.

Small Animal

I was some sort of small animal, but could still talk. There was something about a lake at night, and then I was in a room with bright lights.
I was putting on boots slowly
I was in some animal court, sentenced to death for stealing, but apparently, the method was a roller coaster (kind of).
At the roller coaster, you ride on a skateboard with very strange wheels. There was a metal plate on each side, and on one side the plate had 3 holes, and on the other they had 4 Apparently they can come off easily, because they did and I spent some time putting it back together.
Once the ride begun, it was like a normal roller coaster, and I didn't die.
Afterward, the other animals were all dumbfounded, and let me go.
I was driving a car (still a weird small animal) and a bear began chasing me. However, when he caught up, every time he tried to scare me, I would show it some crazy picture of what it was trying to do on my cell phone, and it would burst into laughing.

New School?

I was in some sort of secret underground rebel base (anti government?) and I was there to transfer my driver's licenses. My dad gave me these things that I had to sign, but he taped them to my hand. This made it rather difficult, but then I realized "Hey, I'm left handed" (I'm not actually). So then I signed them. Then somehow I got to a school, that was a mix of my old school and my new school. The people were the same, but the building was different. There were weird orange plastic mesh barricades set up in the hallways for some reason, and then I realized I had no idea where I was going. So then I decided to go to the office. There I found my old middle school secretary lady working there, and I asked for a schedule. The things I signed earlier had now turned into a full hand cast on both hands. Then my friend Mark said "What did you do to your hands this time?". I told him that sometimes things happen. There was also some weird teacher lady I had never seen before.

I walk into a grocery store, and there is a person in all black by the door after I enter. He was wearing a black shirt that said "Free Alpha Wolf and Beta Wolf." I kept walking, and started thinking to myself how weird it was that the person was wearing that shirt.

Then I thought to myself, well, maybe I am dreaming? So I do an RC at the sign where it says "bathrooms." I looked away and looked back, and the sign turned into the letter "m". Looked away and looked back and it turned into symbols. I also noticed when I looked down I didn't have any pants on, just boxers.

"Holy shit, I am dreaming!"

I remember thinking to myself how real it felt, and it was very, very vivid. I decide to try and relax and to explore my environment for a while before I decided to do a transformation. So, I walk into the bathroom and start to look around.

As I am heading down this hallway, the weight of the entire dream shifted to one side. Then right as I gained my balance and got up, the weight shifted to the other side. All of a sudden I started freaking out. For some reason I figured that while I was in this dream, I was in my car driving, and that was why my weight started to shift from side to side in my dream.

I wanted to wake up, I started trying to force myself to wake up by any means possible. I was yelling and punching the mirror, but that only seemed to make things clearer and more lucid ironically. It was a weird feeling, because I never wanted to get out of a lucid before this, and it felt like I was genuinely stuck in the dream world.

I decided to just relax and calm down. I figured if I was stuck in a lucid dream, might as well take advantage of it. So, I continued down the hall way looking around.

When I turn the corner, I see that it is a guys dressing room for like a gym. I recognized some of the faces, and it was a little awkward.

"This has got to change." I said out loud to myself, "The next corner I turn, this dressing room will turn into a ladies dressing room."

Sure enough, around the next bend the room was filled up with extremely attractive women getting dressed and undressed.

I said out loud, "Now this is more like it."

starting to feel a tad perverted, I decided to leave it behind and continue on to explore. On the wall of the ladies dressing room was a hand dryer with some words on it,and I decided to make another reality check with it. I looked away and looked at it again. The words above the dryer then turned into some symbols. Did it again, the words turned into letters in no particular order. I finally did it one more time and the words spelled out "droy dinosaurs."
I thought it was hilarious so I crept closer to the words and made a mental note to make sure and remember it to write in my dream journal when I woke up.

I think that making this mental note actually kick-started me into waking up. I started to feel my body in my bed, and I completely forgot to recover it by spinning or rubbing my hands.

Note: Finally! Didn't end up doing what I really wanted in the dream, but at least it is an end of a dry spell for me.

The Hotel Room and the Missing Board Shorts

So I'm in a hotel room and my parents have left to go somewhere but have not told me when they'd be back. There's someone else in the room on the bed but it's no one I know. After a while of just looking around, I get the feeling that they've left me and aren't coming back at all. So I start packing up all my stuff. Into a suitcase I'm putting all my clothes from the vacation. Shorts, t-shirts. I must be somewhere beachy. So I'm thinking... I really want to go to the pool or the beach. I start looking for my board shorts because when I look down I'm wearing khaki shorts and gym shoes and I just can't go swimming in that. I look in the bathroom thinking maybe they were wet and hanging over the edge of the bathtub... not in there. I look through everything I packed... not in there. Then I look under the bed... there are two Pez dispensers, but no board shorts. I look in between the bed and the nightstand... there are two pairs of Adio shoes, my grey ones and my black ones... and a glass of red wine... but no board shorts. I start finding all the shoes I own currently in the hotel room and I put them all in a silver Express bag. I go through my stuff again and find the board shorts!! They're black and white, but I was looking for purple ones. I pack them. I walk out of the hotel room.

The Lucid Casino

I'm walking out of the hotel room thinking, maybe I won't go for a swim, but I'll go to the casino. Mom and dad are gone, they won't care. I think on the way that I've left my player card in between the mattress and box spring back in the hotel room. It was fleeting though, because I kept going to the casino. I get there and look in my back pocket and find among other things my player card. I walk up the the first slot machine I see and put in my player card and choose to play all reels. I see that I only have like three dollars left, but it's on my player card, not on a slip of paper. Anyway, I play once and win like $20. Which is awesome because I am pretty sure I'm only playing penny slots. So I play all reels again and... I hit the jackpot! Something comes up on the screen that says it's just going to give me cash. I look down and sure enough there's a dispenser spitting out ones... then fives. I have a stack of almost all five dollar bills like a foot and a half tall. On the top the last bill to come out is a $50,000 bill. I look at it and it's from the casino, not real money. It says I'm in a drawing to win ten million dollars and the odds are three in twenty. Not bad. So I think I need to cash this in for smaller bills. I go to "customer service" and tell the lady that I need to change this out. It was really hard to walk with all that cash. I put it down on the counter and the stack tipped over. She was surprised at all that cash and asked how I wanted it. I said fiftys and hundreds. Then... I tried to text Andrea to tell her I just won $50,000!! I look at my phone and it's like a sidekick. I don't have a sidekick. Texting her didn't work. I was thinking, am I in Vegas or Atlantic City? My heart is racing... and I think... this oh no, this is all wrong... this can't be real... I'm dreaming this. And I think I told the lady at the counter, "This isn't real, is it?" And I just thought, FUCK. I really wish this were real. I got so angry and I started telling the lady, "This is $50,000. I was going to pay my car off, my student loans, all my bills!" The logic part of my brain kicked in. But for a moment, everything was so life like. I really felt like I was standing at the counter there, feet on the ground, counting all that money. I was too upset to try to do anything now that I was lucid. I was looking at my phone that was all wrong, trying to tell myself, this isn't a dream, this is real!! I was trying to convince myself that I really had just won all that money. The lady asks me if I was on machine 258 because she was reading the stats this morning and that one was supposed to pay out today. I said I didn't know, and then in the middle of the stack of money was a paper with the machine info on it. She looked at it then showed me and sure enough I was on machine 258. Then the lady hands me a touch screen thing to sign for the money and I asked her didn't she want to see my id. She said no. Fuck. I'm really dreaming. So I'm losing my lucidity. I take the thing to sign and it's so hard to write my name with this stylus she handed me. Then I look at it and my last name isn't spelled right. I go into some options screen to change everything to times new roman and fix my last name but it doesn't work. Then Andrea's alarm went off.

The Amazing Christmas Lights

I was driving down the street leaving my parents' house when I look up and notice there is a tree that's about 400 feet tall with Christmas lights all over it. They're LED lights, not just your normal old school lights. I know this because I drove into the neighborhood and found what street it was on. All down the street there were more trees like that one, just not as large. I must have gotten out of the car somewhere along the way because the next thing I know I'm in someone's backyard on their deck overlooking a lake sitting in a chair talking to them telling them about the lights. Then I look up in the sky and there is a beautiful fireworks display. I told the people I was with to look out on the lake to see the reflection of all the fireworks.

The Lucid Beach

I was at the beach looking out into the ocean. There were people there in the water and I see sharks coming. I thought to myself that's unsafe. So I changed the sharks into dolphins. The waves were crashing and the dolphins were jumping in and out of the waves. I raised my hands above my head and the waves grew really tall! I put my hands down and it wasn't like my other beach dreams where they get out of control when they crash. They just kind of shrank back down to normal. I raised my arms again with emphasis this time and the wave grew as high as the sun was up in the sky. I put my arms back down and the waves went back down again. That's when it hit me... I'm making this happen... I'm dreaming this!!

So I thought of everything I had read on DV and tried to stay calm. The first thing I did was rub my hands together. I could actually feel myself rubbing my hands together. It was bizarre. Such a different feeling than anything I had dreamed before. I had never felt something like that. I looked around and I was still on the beach, it looked a little bit more stable and a bit more clear. I really felt like I was standing on the beach. I wanted it to feel even more real, so I said, "Clarity now!!" Never before in a dream had I felt and heard myself say something. I just kind of felt dialogue, but this felt like I was awake hearing myself say something. But, it didn't make anything that much more clear. I think I was too excited about how it felt to be lucid. I remembered one more thing I wanted to do. I tried to spin. I closed my eyes and thought not about being somewhere else particularly, but just not being on the beach anymore. The first thing I came up with was kind of a construction site, but I didn't want to be there, so I tried to spin again and I ended up back at the beach. It was then that I lost lucidity. I think I was either too excited that it was actually working or frustrated that I ended up back at the beach. I probably should have just stayed there anyway. I can't wait to try again!!

I just remembered.... I felt at some point like I had woken up and Andrea came into the bedroom from the living room where she said she was looking up recipes. I was sleeping at the bottom of the bed instead of at the top. When I actually woke up I asked her if I said anything in my sleep and she said she didn't hear anything and I was never at the bottom of the bed. I wonder if that's a false awakening. I'm going to read about that now.

Non dream|nonlucid|lucid

It's just barely my birthday. I decided to take a short nap.

I lay for a while, body starts twitching, vibrating all over. I start seeing random partial scenes, still unsure as to whether I'm 'far enough in yet' to start building. I try, just a little, to move my body. I'm in SP. Feel like my fingers weigh a ton. Okay, I think, so I'm good to go. I stare into the darkness. Ask myself what I should be doing. Show me something useful. Remind me what to do. Ah! A lightbulb comes over my head. I've never flown. I guess I'll try it. I'm not sure what else to do with myself. I've tried 'flying' before but I just ended up jumping really high, wasn't trying hard enough. Well, here goes. I stand straight and insist that I'm 'like a bullet fired up from the ground'.

Well, I flew alright- STRAIGHT UPWARD. I start SHOOTING into space, weaving between asteroids and past planets. I see Jupiter and Saturn go by. I start going faster and faster, and I'm starting to freak out because the speed is causing 'wind resistance' as I cut through friggen space, and the roaring of it is making my ears hurt really bad. (Wtf.) I say to myself hey, it doesn't matter. It's just a dream. It's not like my ears 'actually hurt'. I try to ignore it. The pain just ramps up.

I feel my head start lolling to the side, sliding down the pillow.

The pain has gotten intolerable. I sigh and stop, floating in space. The ROARing in my ears still continues like I've got the meanest invisible earbuds playing static on max volume. It's like some kind of glitch is happening and I'm still 'hearing wind resistance' even though I'm stationary- and what's worse, it's *in* my ears, not coming from somewhere else.

I feel my hand now also begin to slide off the couch. My body begins to follow it, slowly rolling down onto the floor.

I try to do my usual 'hand crank in the air to turn down the volume'. The volume won't go down. I begin to wonder if something in WL is causing this. The pain doesn't stop. I start to lose my concentration. I feel my center of gravity get all jacked up, like my body is being flipped over.

I hear the halfglass of water and box of tissues get knocked off the foot of the couch by my feet as I roll over and fall, on my back, onto the floor. I lay there for a while, completely still, wondering if I can just keep dreaming regardless. I keep my eyes closed and focus on the planets I'd just seen move by. No dice. I open my eyes and start trying to move, but I'm still coming out of sleep paralysis. (For me, trying to move during sleep paralysis feels BADONG and uncomfortable- like a turd going back up your ass when you're trying to pinch one off.) I lay there for a while with my eyes barely open, unmoving. I look over and see that I've somehow overturned the couch while falling. Sigh.

I wrench myself out of it and get up, to set the couch back upright again. I start clearing the table and cleaning the house like I should've been in the first place. I am grouchy now. The couch is heavier than I expected, I start putting all my weight into shoving it. HRRGHHH

Realize the 'HURGH' discomfort is coming from my body, still in SP, still trying to move. I see the livingroom light behind my eyelids now. I'm awake. I lay there for a while to make sure I'm out of it before I start moving. I get up. DRAT.

NOTES: In the FA, there were several things that should have indicated it wasn't WL, that I failed to notice: 1. I was in my exboyfriend's flannel robe. I went to sleep in a pair of shorts. 2. THE COUCH WAS SIDEWAYS. No matter how hard a 125lb person 'falls off' a 6foot couch, the couch does *not* 'flip over' from the sheer force of them falling off while sleeping. Wtf. 3. I ONLY 'fall off the bed' during FA's! I've only fallen off the bed 'for real' ONE TIME when I was a kid. How would I be 'sliding off the 'bed' during SP?! Derp. 4. The livingroom light was off, and the lamp was on- so it was dark. In WL I'd left all the lights on.

Non-dreamnon-lucidlucid

Kit had described to me a nightmare she had in which there was a family who lived in a home in the middle of the woods. She described that the family overall behaved normally, but that something seemed Very Very Wrong about them. I asked her if, upon waking, she had pinpointed any of the subtleties that might explain the undercurrent of malaise. She mentions that there was melted snow on the lawn, and in the distance the forest is covered in snow, even though it's autumn. They also keep the fire roaring constantly even though the house is sweltering, and the mother is constantly swaddled in down comforters. The bright young daughter repeatedly reminds everyone to 'keep your shoes by the door, just in case!' It's implied that 'something' will come into the house if the place isn't kept very hot. I ask her if she's ever considered revisiting the dream to find out what It is. She says no. I joke about finding out for myself.

My father and I are driving down a long road. As it progresses, we begin weaving through trees. It becomes snowier and snowier, until the veil of white is so encompassing that we can't see where we're going. He stops the car, and we're barely able to see a house off in the distance. He says he's going to go and ask them for help, possibly use their phone, stay right here. When he opens the door to get out, he zones staring into the snowstorm. I ask him 'What's up?' and he says, 'I just... Got a really bad feeling. Bah, nevermind... Hey. Just. Keep the heat running in here, okay? I'll be right back.' I agree and turn the heat on high.

He vanishes into the snow. Inside the car, the heat begins to die. My breath steams up inside. It grows darker, I notice the snow looks less like snow, and more like a blizzard of frozen ash. I hear something moving; the sound of footsteps echoing like stones thrown to the bottom of a deep dry well. They begin circling the vehicle, getting closer. I squint out the window and notice that all around the house, up on the hill, the snow is melted. I realize I'm in Kit's dream.

I pull out my father's business laptop and log on to AIM and start freaking out and asking her what I'm supposed to do to fend off the creature. 'DUDE. I'M IN THE FUCKING ICE PLACE. WHAT DO I DO?' 'wut' 'GOD DAMNIT IT'S COMING FUCK' I hear a strong wind blowing at the door, reaching out for the handle to open it. I slam the lock down. Realize there are three other doors, all still unlocked. It goes for the one behind me, I lock it- but as I'm pushing the lock down, it's already circling around the front and going for the front left. I push that one down, it's already going for the far rear. I hurl my body across the backseat to reach the lock, push it down, landing with my face inches from the window.

What the fuck ARE YOU? A face SLAMS against the window and smears across it. It looks like Ambi(girl who has been behaving like a stalker toward me), but it's more like her corpse, inhabited and puppeted by the ice, partially frozen, blue and wet with rot. Her eye contorts as it smears across the window. I begin to sob. 'There you go, Kit. There you fucking go, it's a SHAPE SHIFTER. It manifests in the form of whatever you're most afraid of, whatever you're most paranoid of, in the moment you see it.' Now that I know what it is, I'm scared thoroughly shitless. Realizing I'm scared has a snowball effect because it means I'm going to lose lucidity, and my ability to steer the dream before I go under.

I have to get out and face the blizzard, and 'fix it' so I stop having this nightmare before my chance is up and I go under. I'm getting rapidly distracted by fear. I open the car door and step out into it, and in a split second I feel my will being whisked away by the blizzard. 'ohfuck ohfuck I have to turn it into something else... Turn into a... a... shit! TURN INTO A BAR OF SOAP!'

I lose control right as the transformation happens. And for a moment actually can't remember why or how the monster turned into a bar of soap, or even that it was a monster. For a few moments I'm terribly confused and start to cry, because 'Oh my god, something is turning people into bars of soap... What the fuck is going on?!!' (note: my non-lucid dream self is usually a blithering idiot) I then remember that 'I'm the one who did this, I turned Ambi into a bar of soap!' despaaairrr, whiiiine! I start beating myself up over how stupid I am, how could I do such a thing- also, I am 'an idiot for choosing a bar of soap, because when the snow melts it will activate the soap, creating liquid soap and suds, the melt will carry it into the gutters and it will travel out to sea and HURT THE ECOSYSTEM OMG'. I bawl on my hands and knees in the snow like a moron. The dream ends.

22.07.2010

Lucidity? (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Here are some fragments of dreams. I couldn't remember any dreams really, I do not know why, but here is some fragments.

1. I remember something about band practice. I wanted to practice somewhere else but we were told we had to practice at my house.

2. I was in the car with my mom. I did the nose pinch reality check, and I could breathe! I knew I was in a dream. I forgot everything that happened.

3. I was telling my sister and her friend about how I finally had a lucid dream, although it was short.

i remembered one dream i had i was at my high school and it looked normal until people who ive never ever ever seen at my school were there thats when i started thinking him this is a bit weird then people started appering from no were thats when i fighured out this is a dream. thats when i thought one of my mates i was hanging out with had loads of pot so i asked and incredibly i was right so we rolled up a joint that was bigger then me and smoked it. (the whole thing) all of a sudden i started floating then i floated all around my school showing everyone and they were laughing because i couldnt put my feet on the ground lol

aw and in another dream i was at my house and this massive frikin spider was trying to eat me so i closed my eyes tightly shut then suddenly my dream teleported me to my room everything looked extremely normal i got out of bed put my uniform on for school then my brother in law woke me up in real life and i was in my room i got out of bed and put my uniform on then realised "hay i just did this" lol so i thort i had deja vu hahaha but i realised later on in the day that it was a dream

07/21/10

I try to figure out this teleporting thing. Hazel helps out.



The scene drifts into focus. I'm sitting on the cool, freshly trimmed grass outside the Ixburg Inn. My surroundings are hazy, and I feel half-asleep.

It's one of those late-morning, about to wake up dreams. I dig my fingers into the soft grass and soil. I'm dreaming, I tell myself. I'm lucid.

I stare at the yellow metal siding of the warehouse beyond the fence, trying to remember my lucid goals. I can't remember the first one, so I go down the list until something pops out at me.

#2. Find Hazel.

I feel for my phone in the front left-hand pocket of my jeans. The colours around me start to grey out, and I slowly lower my hand to the ground. I grab fistfuls of grass and breathe deep, watching the sky get brighter and bluer as I calm down. Sunlight beams down from the sky. I'm facing the other direction, toward the back of the motel rooms. There are apple trees beyond the fence.

I slip my hand into my pocket (left-hand, right-hand, there isn't any difference) and pull out my phone. I think I should try this method one more time before I give up on it.

Leaning against the red fence, I mash seven random digits into the keypad (one of them is an "8") and hold the phone to my ear. It rings twice.

"Hello?" says a female voice on the other end.

"Hazel?" I ask. "Are you asleep?"

"Obviously." She seems amused.

I shake my head. I'm still not sure this is really Hazel. "Want to try to meet up?"

"Can you teleport?"

I hesitate.

An impatient noise from her end of the phone, and Hazel is standing in front of me. The chin-length black hair is her dream-avatar's most distinctive feature, and I doubt it's what her hair looks like in real life.

We're standing on the other side of the fence, drifting slowly westward without my knowing. A DC lurks at the periphery of my awareness, and I think it's a childhood friend.

We discuss the best way to get back to her dream. I explain an idea I've been putting together, that instead of opening a portal or a door, I just need to imagine the new setting and drift slowly into it. The danger is in how easily this could trigger a false awakening.

Hazel says she wants to try something. She touches my forehead with two fingers. I fall back onto the tall grass, frozen in place. I can't move, and the scene is fading into black. I'm not worried, though. She starts talking, describing the setting of her dream.

I pop back into existence between one second and the next. I can still hear the words, but they sound like nonsense. I'm surrounded by orange wooden cabinetry, and I think I'm in a basement. The narration starts to describe the exact kind of cupboard exists across from me, and I snap, "Okay! I get it! I'm here!"

I'm sitting down on a bunk bed when Hazel appears again. The dream destabilizes.

I "wake up".

I'm in the basement of a church, or maybe my late grandma's house (she was a minister). I'm trying to find a bible, because the narrator has apparently been quoting bible verses at me.

I'm flipping through the book, but I don't remember the order. "Where was Ecclesiastes, again?

"Near the end," says Grandma.

I mutter something about having had these memorized at one point.

The dream ends.

I'm the commander of a fleet of ships, taking shelter in an empty harbour. A woman with long, blonde curly hair stands beside me, asking about the clouds on the horizon.

"Those are pure ozone," I tell her. "They're poisonous, but they won't come up onto the coast."

"I wish we could go out to them," she says wistfully.

Looking at the swirling mass of dark clouds, I almost agree with her.

Hazel. Scare Factor: 3.

Haaaazel, you're being all mysterious and otherworldly. Stop it.

Also: Facebook, guys? Really?

Note: It seems L has been causing problems again, still trying to get to Asuka even though he has a girlfriend of his own, and now he is using Kanmuri to do it! We came to the conclusion that we were going to try to make L afraid of Asuka, so that he would want to avoid her at all costs. My goal for tonight was to go ahead to do this. I fell asleep, failed to slip into my WILD. I actually don't remember the beginning of this dream or exactly how I became lucid, but here is the dream from the point where I start remembering it…


The earliest thing I remember in this dream is being in MoSh's inner world. I was in the living room with MoSh and Asuka. MoSh was playing a video game on the flat screen television while Asuka was watching him. Asuka got up and came over to me. She said she was ready to do whatever we had to do to make sure L would finally stop bothering her and MoSh. I told her I had a plan I thought might work. She said she knew, and she was ready to do the fusion. I said there was one more part to it… while fused, we should go out of MoSh's inner world and do something Asuka would enjoy doing… thus making her an easy target. So when L took her back to his inner world, that was when his nightmare would begin. MoSh seemed to have barely noticed I was there, I wasn't fully convinced MoSh had noticed me at all. I touched him on the shoulder and he finally looked up. I told him Asuka and I were off to give L a nice nightmare. I said L might need a few nightmares to get the point across, but it would start now. MoSh saved his video game and changed the channel. He said he would watch it from there. I asked Asuka what she would like to go out and do, she said she likes gardens and flowers, so that's what I focused on when I opened a portal. Asuka and I fused using the fusion amulet and went through the portal.

There was a beautiful garden on the other side of the portal, just as I had wanted to find. I could feel that Asuka liked it very much. I just let her control our fused body as she wandered through the garden, looking at the various flowers, smelling some of them, admiring others from afar, she picked one and put it in our hair. The garden was full of winding paths, there was a stream flowing through it with a pretty bridge over it, and Asuka's goal seemed to be to explore every bit of the garden. There was no questioning that the garden was pretty, but I was beginning to think L wasn't going to take the bait this time. Had he not noticed that Asuka was wandering around in a garden by herself? Had he caught on to the trick? Was he not as interested in Asuka as we had thought? Whatever the reason, it was beginning to look like he wasn't going to show up at all. I was just about to suggest to Asuka that we go home, I was getting a bit bored, when a portal opened in front of us. Without even giving much of a look around to make sure Asuka was alone, L's arm reached through the portal to grab our left arm and pull us through into his inner world.

I recognized L's inner world right away, we were near the pool that is outside of his house. I saw that Kanmuri was already back there, she was lying out on a lounge near the pool sunning herself when we arrived. She got up and looked over at L and me, rolling her eyes in an exacerbated manner. She asked L if he was never going to get it through his head that Asuka has no interest in him, he should stop going after some woman who didn't want him and give his attention all to her. She said she has an open mind about L having another woman around, but he should quit already with this woman who clearly doesn't like him. L said he had rescued me once more, that MoSh had carelessly let me out on my own, and now he would make sure I was protected. He said he knew I wanted to stay with him and he would make sure that this time it happened, MoSh and Raven weren't going to take me away from him this time.

I looked around at the pool and the house. I told L he might just be the man for me, assuming he has bigger balls than MoSh who seems to get mad at me every time I start to have some fun. L said of course, he has much bigger balls than MoSh, how could there be any doubt about that? He said his purpose would be to ensure I had fun every moment I was there with him. I smiled at him and said maybe I could be happy here after all, he said it had taken me long enough to acknowledge that he was really the one I want… he apparently thought I wasn't dressed properly, however, because he motioned and my clothes changed to a tiny sundress that left absolutely nothing to the imagination. I didn't really care. L looked at me in the sundress, practically drooling, and then said whatever would make me happy and want to stay was what I would get.

I told L what I really wanted to do was play some of the games I never get to play with MoSh without him getting mad. He asked what game I wanted to play. I said hide and seek… with a twist. I gave him a sexy look along with that suggestion which clearly got his attention. I said I would hide first. He said sure… then I said for him to count to 50, then come find me… He turned his back and started counting rather fast, I was actually surprised he could count that high. I went into the house and looked around in the first room I was in which appeared to be a kitchen. I moved through the kitchen into the living room where there was a lot of fancy furniture. I noticed one corner where there was a particularly dark shadow, I changed form into a shadow and merged with that shadow becoming completely invisible. Shortly later L came into the room. He said he knew I was in there. So… let the show begin.

L seemed pretty sure I was in the room, I wondered if he was cheating somehow. I focused on changing the dreamscape now, causing the shadows to grow and take over the room. Where it had been pretty bright and cheerful, now it was rather dark and dreary. L seemed to think that was strange, but he continued looking for me. I morphed my shadow form into my normal form, but I was dressed in tight leather instead of the sundress. L did a brief double take, but then said he had found me, so what was his reward? I said I wanted to hear him scream, he said he was sure I could make him scream. I said I knew I could, giving off an evil grin at the same time. Some of the other shadows formed dark tentacles and bound him to the floor, arms and legs spread, he apparently still thought he was in for some wild sex…

I had long fingernails which were actually thin blades dripping with acid. As I was standing over him some of the acid dripped onto him and burned through his clothes, burning into his skin. Those blade fingernails could be fired… so I fired one into his right shoulder where it smoked a bit as the acid ate away at his flesh, he let out a brief cry of pain and asked me what the fuck I thought I was doing… I said I was playing my game with him, I wanted to hear him scream. I fired more of the spears into him, into his arms, into his legs, anywhere I could fire one without hitting a vital organ and allowing him to die too quickly. I'd said I wanted to hear him scream, and he was screaming now. I took a couple of minutes to stand over him and laugh at his pain, he was screaming that it hurt so much, begging me to stop, crying like a baby, and a foul odor wafted over from him… he'd shit his pants! I acted disappointed, saying even MoSh had been able to play games better than this… how disappointing, because I was just getting started.

As I was deciding where to fire the next blade, Kanmuri came into the room and looked around. She asked what was going on in there, she had heard screaming… she looked and saw L pinned to the floor by shadows and with the blades sticking out of him, acid burning the areas around the blades. Now L was begging Kanmuri to help him, telling her that Asuka (I) had gone completely insane. Kanmuri looked upset, thought I think she was feigning it, and asked me what I was doing to her man, let him go right now. I made the dark tendrils retract, the room was bright and cheery once again. L still couldn't move, the blades had him pinned to the floor. I was definitely willing to help. I said it seemed neither L nor Kanmuri wanted to have any fun after all. I pulled the first blade out of L, doing this brought another scream of agonizing pain.

The blade was barbed so that it would go in smoothly but the barbs would extend when pulling it out, ripping the flesh on its way out. Kanmuri told me to stop doing that, I was hurting him. I said she wanted him to be free to get up, right? I continued pulling the blades out one by one, not doing it especially fast, twisting them a bit as I pulled them out, basically doing whatever I could to increase the pain they were causing… and of course the acid kept burning even after I had removed the blades. L was begging incoherently now, I couldn't tell what he was saying. The instant I got the last blade out Kanmuri was over to me telling me to stay away from him, how could I be so sick as to do those horrible things? I told her he had agreed to play my game… now he wanted to back out. How rude. Kanmuri told me to get out of L's inner world, she told me I wasn't welcome there. She began healing L's wounds, clearly soothing his pain with healing energy. I figured she wanted to be the good guy since she wanted L to focus his affection on her. I didn't interfere with that and I opened a portal back to MoSh's inner world when Kanmuri told me again that I was not welcome there.

Been back from camp for a few days now, just didn't have time to type out the dreams. Well, my recall was crap for numerous reasons, but I actually had a lucid while I was there! Of that, I remember walking around in some building with murals all over the top half of the walls, and sculpture-type things of animals on the bottom halves. I think I was lucid from the beginning, and I know I tried to fly and wasn't succesful. (Big surprise. ) Then I had some horrible nightmare about someone hacking Molly into pieces with an axe. Can't remember any other dreams I had at camp, but in the last few days there's been some frags I can remember... something about a house in a forest, and Medusa.