non-lucid

30th of March 2011: non-lucid, lucid, extra comment.

I am part of an RPG, one of my own creations that has yet to be worked out. I seem to have lost something and go around asking my family, trying to find out what has happened.

I met an elf, of the same age as me, she was the one that introduced vampirism to create better soldiers. I have a flashback; A soldier is being insulted by his 'friends/colleagues' because he is a vampire. I get into a card and an older woman, my mentor, drives me somewhere, through parts of my neighbourhood. In my next mission, something reminiscent of a revolution is occurring. I need to spy on someone's iPod like machine and retrieve a code amongst other things.

I am about halfway through the code when the alarmclock rings and I wake up.

I am at Lomond View Elementary running from these people that are after a ring of branches that I had with me. This ring of branches is magical. If you say the right phrase and put it in the right position on the ground it will do whatever you want it to. I used it, Incorrectly, but it still worked, to summon a Go Kart and was driving away from the guys that were now in a van. The path I was driving on had a lot of swinging gates on it so I would use the ring to close the gates and make the guys behind me take detours. I ended up losing them and drove around to the back of the school where my friends were waiting for me on the playground. They all seemed disappointed and looked like they though I wasn't going to get away from the guys until they saw me coming down the hill. We ran out into a field that was behind the playground and tried to use the ring to get away. It wasn't working. I tried again and it still wouldn't work. This is the point of the dream that I found out you had to do those special things I mentioned earlier to get the ring to work. The phrase was something involving Click Clack... But I dont' really remember anything else from it. One of the kids with me, who was really fat, knew the secret phrase and took the ring and used it to summon a portal to somewhere else and we all went through.

I was now at my house and all of the kids were gone. I think my friends were there with me but I don't remember very well if there was anyone else. I heard the garage door opening and I went outside to look and my dad was coming home. I went out there and there was another car behind him that looked like a police car. Two people stepped out. One person in a business suit and another in boxing shorts and a robe. He asked us, "Have you heard of the back door burglar?"

My dad said, "Well, I heard that a house a few houses down got ripped off but I didn't know that it happened again." The guy told us to watch out for him and took off. I said to my dad, "Man, he looked tired."

I went out back to check our doors and all of them were in place. I climbed up my deck, which now had a spiral staircase on it and was pretty high off the ground, to check that door and it was good as well. We walked around front and the front door was open except for a glass door. My dad went in first and as soon as he got in there a woman with a baseball bat hit him and took him hostage. I opened the door after him and tried to go inside but there was also a guy in there and they both had guns. I told them to let my dad go and take me instead and they happily obliged. The woman grabbed me and my dad went into his room to grab a gun. I was pushed down some stairs and the guy was at the bottom. He looked at me, raised his gun, and shot me in the head. I started to fall over and then I didn't die. I went to the guy, who had a terrified look on his face, and tried to grab his gun. He shot me again. I still didn't die. At this point I started moaning and went all zombie on the guy and he freaked out and backed into a lay-z-boy chair that was in the room. I grabbed his gun and started to club him in the head with it. The woman had either run off or disappeared at this point. I kept hitting him but nothing was happening until finally his head popped and he died. There was an old woman at the other end of the room I was in and she told me that I should have died but I missed my chance and now I would have a meeting about it. She opened this safe looking door and told me to go through it. I never did.

[INDENT][RIGHT][SIZE="1"][COLOR="#000000"]31.03.2011[/COLOR][/SIZE][/RIGHT]
[SIZE="3"][COLOR="Black"]The Live Room[/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE="1"][COLOR="#000000"](Non-lucid)[/COLOR][/SIZE]

[SIZE="1"][COLOR="#000000"]NON-DREAM[/COLOR] [COLOR="#800080"]DREAM[/COLOR] [COLOR="#00008B"]LUCID[/COLOR][/SIZE]

[COLOR="#000000"][/COLOR][COLOR="#000000"]Note: I remember this dream was incredibly long, but alas, my bad recall.

I'm in a library researching something.

[/COLOR][COLOR="#800080"]I was frustrated, looking up research for my assignment when some shady guy handed me a document with "The Live Room" written on it, before I could ask what it was, he was gone. He was weird and the document said confidential so I went on to study for my assignment. Eventually my curiosity got the better of me and I looked in the document, I can't exactly remember what it said, but it had a location in it, I went there.

[/COLOR][COLOR="#000000"]It was a small office with things scattered around the floor, there were few people there but it seemed hectic and strained.

[/COLOR][COLOR="#800080"]The moment I went through the door, there was a woman who looked stressed who pretty much shoved me back out the door until the guy who gave me the document intervened, saying he invited me. The woman looked at him kinda like how a serious person looks at a carefree goof when he makes a mistake, she had daggers in her eyes, and he was laughing. I can't exactly remember what went on here, but I was pretty sure it was illegal, and the live room had access to all information in the world. Before I could ask anything more, the woman sent me somewhere.

[/COLOR][COLOR="#000000"]All I remember is a beautiful sight with a lush field and cliffs, where I took a quick look at the live room document.

[/COLOR][COLOR="#800080"]When I got back, the woman said I can now use the live room whenever I want.[/COLOR][/INDENT]

[INDENT][RIGHT][SIZE="1"][COLOR="#000000"]31.03.2011[/COLOR][/SIZE][/RIGHT]
[SIZE="3"][COLOR="Black"]Smile For The Camera...Crash And Burn[/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE="1"][COLOR="#000000"](Non-lucid)[/COLOR][/SIZE]

[SIZE="1"][COLOR="#000000"]NON-DREAM[/COLOR] [COLOR="#800080"]DREAM[/COLOR] [COLOR="#00008B"]LUCID[/COLOR][/SIZE]

[COLOR="#000000"][/COLOR][COLOR="#000000"]I was some sort of racer in the most dangerous cup in the world, where there were guns, fire, jumps and things like that, we raced things called Razor Cycles. The races aren't decided by place, but by audience points.

By the way, my name's Mason

[/COLOR][COLOR="#800080"]I was[/COLOR][COLOR="#000000"] [/COLOR][COLOR="#800080"]prepping my cycle [/COLOR][COLOR="#000000"](fitting it with the weapons)[/COLOR][COLOR="#800080"] when my real life friend J came to get me, saying that the organiser has an annoucement for the racers. We all gathered around a table with a strange disk-like device on it, we all looked around, confused at eachother.

The strange device started floating as the annoucer explained that the audience wanted a more close up view of the race and that they would be positioned above the track. When someone passes near one it will follow them for a while, taking pictures and video.

[I]Organiser: Make sure to smile for the cameras
J: Will it give us extra points or something?
Me: Yes, it will give us extra points when we blast you while you're distracted
Everyone: Laugh
Stishka: That's right we'll destroy you together, huh, Mason?

[/I]Back at the track, we were racing, I was in 2nd place in front of J, and behind Stishka. Come the camera, J had a stupid look on his face as Stishka and I double bazooka'd him.[I] [/I]The final result of the whole cup was 1st Place - Stishka, 2nd Place - Mason, 3rd Place - Krezic...9th Place - J. [/COLOR][COLOR="#000000"](out of 12)

[/COLOR][COLOR="#800080"]Stishka and I got the photo and made sure to show J, perfect moment.[/COLOR][/INDENT]

[INDENT][RIGHT][SIZE="1"][COLOR="#000000"]31.03.2011[/COLOR][/SIZE][/RIGHT]
[SIZE="3"][COLOR="Black"]Don't Think You Understand Her[/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE="1"][COLOR="#000000"](Non-lucid)[/COLOR][/SIZE]

[SIZE="1"][COLOR="#000000"]NON-DREAM[/COLOR] [COLOR="#800080"]DREAM[/COLOR] [COLOR="#00008B"]LUCID[/COLOR][/SIZE]

[COLOR="#000000"][/COLOR][COLOR="#000000"]Note: Everything was anime style[/COLOR][COLOR="#800080"]

[/COLOR][COLOR="#000000"]I was training with swords along with a girl called Na'ki at a Edo period style dojo.

[/COLOR][COLOR="#800080"]We were training normal as we apparently do every day but then suddenly, out of no-where some slightly threatening looking guy comes and grabs Na'ki and tries to run away with her. I yell out to Na'ki, as she yells back and the guy suddenly stops and asks what I am to her, to which I reply "a friend".

Still holding onto Na'ki, he yells out that I can never understand her and challenges me to a duel.[/COLOR][COLOR="#000000"]

End of what I can remember...[/COLOR][/INDENT]

Dream - Lucid - AP

I was in my family's garage, on the side my dad's car is usually on, but it wasn't in there. I was looking at some photos in an album. I knew I was about to get married, and my heart sank for a minute, because I thought that I was marrying someone other than Ryan. Then, I saw a photo of Ryan and I together, and I knew that I was, in fact, going to marry him. I got excited, and stayed excited throughout the entire dream.

Then, I was at some place that was going to do a photoshoot of our engagement, and my bridesmaids. We were sitting outside. There were some of my friends whom I would like to be in my wedding sitting in chairs. Courtney is one that I remember vividly being there. But there was a girl there whom I rarely talk to in waking life, Erica. I wondered what she was doing there. I also didn't see MK or Caitlin there. I figured they were off busy with something and couldn't make it.

I then remember looking through a photo album of pictures that were already taken of my wedding party and I. In a lot of them, I was sitting on a bed with a light, seafoam green shirt on under a wedding gown. A lot of my bridesmaids were around me in a lot of the photos.

Then, I remember seeing a program/menu for the wedding/reception. I then knew why Erica was there--because her mom was helping with the food for the reception. On the menu I saw something about crawfish (which I've never eaten in waking life). I thought that was interesting. I also looked for my bridesmaids' names on the program. I saw some of them, but some were hard to read.

Then, I was sitting next to Ryan inside this building that the photoshoot was in. We were sitting on chairs inside the edge of this pen that was fenced in with a low, black, fence made of metal bars. We were waiting to do this photo of him throwing the engagement ring to me, and me catching it. The thing was, he hadn't formally proposed to me yet. We just knew we were getting married since we had talked about it so much. I wanted a formal proposal, but it wasn't neccessary. At some point, I called him my boyfriend, and then said "Oh, I mean fiance". He then slipped the ring on my right ring finger, but it was too big. In fact, my pinky fit in it as well. I tried putting it on the left ring finger, and it fit better, but I was supposed to wear it on my right until we got married. I figured I needed to go get it sized at some point.

Then, Jeanne, a lady I work with, called us over. We walked to the other far edge of the pen, and she started giving us instructions on how the photoshoot needed to go.

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Good morning! Got a good night's sleep last night, but only recalled one dream.

20.45: Sleep

05.10: Hockey
I'm playing hockey in my brother's team. I have replaced some other guy and I got his stick. It's made for a left handed person but I quickly learn how to handle it. I do a goal and spin around, it feels great to be skating again. I get to play center and I get the puck before the other guy when the referee drops it. The other team had no idea I had played before and I dribble through the whole team and score another goal.

I head for the booth to talk to my dad. "That was ok. Atleast you're better than Linus (my cousin)." he tells me. How can he NOT be impressed by what I just did?. I try to put on the plastic strips that protects the steel. As I do the dream changes without me knowing it.

I'm talking to my mom and my sister, they're sun bathing. My mom starts talking about her new job. "I'm making 100 k for 100 pictures taken a month". "That's nice! You share it with dad right?" I ask her. "No, he doesn't get anything at all, he can make his own money" she tells me. I get absolutely furious right away. I yell at her for quite some time. "You've always had a fair judgement and a good sense of right and wrong, but I've lost all respect for you now" I tell her. Grrr.

05.10: Wake up

Amount of sleep: 8 hours

Supplements: None

That's it! I will post my results from my little "research project" tomorrow. I know it's almost impossible to get conclusive results as there are way too many things affecting amount of dreams and lucids. But bah.

Keep on dreaming, HARE BRA!

Heading home from work. Traffic camera flashes. I kept cursing in my head. Making my way to a car workshop nearby, I parked close to the open entrance. I see my old friend working there. I instantly walked to a toolbox finding a worklight on it(on the left of the entrance), like if I knew it was supposed to be there. Im starting to look for my EVAP leak (which my car has in real life) while my friend keeps telling me to calm down about the speed camera.

At the car workshop there were many cars and workers, blue car lifted in the air to be welded from the bottom(on the right). Welding and putting the cars together. My friend was wearing yellow high-visibility t-shirt and blue pants. He sat on the driver's seat, left foot outside of the car

The road where the camera flashed is a real road and the camera was at the right spot, the workshop is not real for my knowledge.

I was doing 65kph on 50kph zone when camera flashed. The lights turned from green to red without showing the yellow at all. I drove the left lane, which was wrong lane if I was driving home.

AC DC was playing in the car, "If you want blood".

Wednesday 30th March 2011
I went into a book shop and browsed for something that I might like. After a couple of minutes of searching, a book on one of the shelves eventually caught my eye.

I picked up the book from the shelf and inspected the cover; I can't remember what the subject of the book was, but I vaguely remember the cover having the colour red on it. Deciding to flip through the book, I leafed through the pages to find that they had been covered with layers of yellow tape. There were many strips that covered the whole page --none of the original text or images could be seen.

Going back to the inside cover of the book, I decided to peel it off so I could see what was underneath. Picking at the corner, I eventually got a good hold of the tape and pulled it off. It came off rather easily; and while sticky residue still remained, the ink underneath was left mostly unscathed. There was a pattern of some sort on that page; although I can't remember it clearly.

I decided to buy the book and attempt to take off the yellow tape from all of the other pages when I got home.

Good morning, everybody.

Dream #1

A group of young men sat in a basement room like in some kind of church or school. The walls may have been red bricks. There were windows high up on the walls, letting in plenty of natural light.

The young men sat in a group of folding chairs arranged in a triangle near the left wall of the room. A group of older men entered the room. They sat inn a triangle of folding chairs opposite the men. I saw all this as if my eye level were at about seat-level with the chairs and as if I were between the two triangles of chairs.

The young men had apparently served during some war in the role of torturers. These young men had actually tortured the old men. But now the two groups were supposed to make peace and be friends.

One of the young men asked the old men a kind of silly question about art or movies. One old man didn't want to hear it. The old man was kind of short, with tough, tan skin, and thinning, grey-white hair. He wore a grey blazer and slacks and a maroon sweater. He began shouting at the young man, didn't he think anything he'd done was wrong?

I now got a good view of the young men for the first time. They all projected a feeling of being very beautiful, though they were all actually kind of plain looking. Yet this feeling of beauty also created a scary feeling of calm, methodical cruelty. The men all had books in their laps, different books, as if they had each been independently reading before the old men came in.

One of the young men, a tall, pale man with thick-rimmed glasses, frizzy, black hair, and stubble, and wearing a kind of loose, pudding-yellow sweater, asked the old man a question. The young man had a pencil, as if her were going to write notes in his book.

Somehow the old man and young man got into an argument that implied that now the old men had been the torturers while the young men had been tortured.

The young man asked, "Why did you gather all of us up? Why did you carry us away?"

The old man said, "Because you looked guilty."

The young man asked, "How could we look guilty?"

The old man said, "You know, your looks. You look like a certain type."

I may have figured in my dream or just waking up from my dream that the old man meant "the Jewish type."

Lembre-me de estar caminhando no meio de uma rua da minha cidade e na calçada(ou passeio)havia um homem me acompanhando e ele me dizia:
"Isso tudo é um sonho.","Nada disso aqui é real."...
Então ele pediu para que olhasse para um homem que se encontrava ali e eu olhei, e ele mandou que eu imaginasse que aquele homem ali era um palhaço e eu comecei a imagina-lo como palhaço e de repente ele se transformou num palhaço (Como não fiz nenhum reality check ,não tenho certeza se fiquei lucido por um breve momento). Nesse momento eu fui parar em outro lugar(involuntariamente) , estava dentro de um predio e nesse predio havia uma escadaria muito alta e larga e estava dois homens vestidos de ternos brigando e eu estava jundando um deles ,pois o outro era perigoso e estava com um revolver na mão. E no meio daquela confussão toda o homem disparava a arma varias vezes e eu deviava todas as vezes "até que uma vez ele me acertou e então eu acordei"(ESSE PERIODO ESTA ENTRE ASPAS POIS NÃO TENHO CERTEZA SE OCORREU MESMO OU FOI SÓ MINHA IMAGINAÇÃO)

Orange = Lucid

If only I could remember more of this. It might make a bit more sense, lmao.

I'm somewhere random trying to help this guy bury this dude who accidentally killed himself with a gun (he was about to kill the guy I was with but the gun electrocuted his heart, resulting in him dying instantly). We don't know what to do with the body. There's a pond next to us which I spot out though (we're all standing (in the dead guy's case, lying) on a pile of logs) and me and the guy I'm with roll him off into the pond. We can still see the body. Then somebody is coming for us. I jump up and grab onto something above me, hauling the rest of me up in the process. The guy I'm with hides himself. We don't get caught.

We're now outlaws in the middle of nowhere. It's not just me and this guy though, there's more of us now (we're all dressed up as animals for some reason). This guy is the leader and he's a vulture (or something) Suddenly we're about to get busted again by some form of authority. I curl into a really small ball as to avoid being seen, and surprisingly, I get away with it.

I'm now in a random room. It's baby-like. I'm in a bed with Dad lying next to me. He seems different though. He's way more open, and for some reason fondling my 'area' with his foot, although I don't think he's aware that he's doing so.Then the thought clicks ''Wait, where am I? I'm in a child's room with my Dad who's acting strange and treating me like a child... WHAT?! Have I gone back in time?!''

I'm now in the kitchen with Mum, terrified about the whole going back in time thing, as it's happened a few times and I have zero control over it. I ask her how old I am (to find out where I am). She refuses to answer. I go into the dining room and Dad's coming out of the living room, so I ask him how old I am. He replies ''10''. I freak out. ''What?! NO, I'm almost 18! What's going on?! I'm travelling back in time for reason and I can't stop it at all?!'' Mum dismisses my views. Dad says ''Actually, I have been noticing differences about you recently. You've gotten really tall suddenly for example!'' (I also noticed I wasn't wearing any glasses here, which I wear all the time; another thing which made me think I had gone back).
Then the light goes out, and Mum passes me the phone. I can hear our dead cat on the other end, but there's scary music playing as well, so I put it down quickly and turn the light back on. I'm desperate to be acknowledged at this stage (I'm literally panicking). Something really doesn't feel right. I think to myself ''Why am I going back in time?! How do I stop it?!'' I try to tell Mum about Dizzy (our cat) dying in the 'future'. She doesn't have a clue who Dizzy is. I then realise this must be before we got her, so telling her about it is absolutely pointless.

I'm now on my bike heading to town. It's night and my lights don't work, so I have to be careful not to get hit by cars. I'm still dead scared about the whole time travelling thing.

I'm going down a hill as a near town, passing people with dogs and such. As I enter, it suddenly becomes a house. There's a girl and a boy sitting at the end of a bed, on the floor, to the right of me. In front of me there are stairs. I go down them. There's load of people sitting on couches and having a laugh. None of them seem to welcome me, and make no inclination to wanting me to sit with them/wanting to make room for me. I decide to go back upstairs. The girl and the boy are about to get off. I figure I want to join in some of the action, too, but they tell me no. I think to myself ''It's alright. I can just change it so that they let me.''
.................................................. .
''WAIT. WHAT?! That means I'm dreaming!''
By this point I realised that everything around me was extremely vivid (hence why I mistook it for reality) and became lucid. I almost didn't believe that I was dreaming though, so I did a reality check by trying to push my thumb through my hand. It failed. I figured this might happen (like a previous dream I had where I was dying, and tried this RC only to fail) so I proceeded to hold my nose and try to breathe. During the middle of this, I then noticed a mirror in front of me. One of my best friends Kevin was running (in the mirror) towards me. He then smashed clean through, and was in the room with us. I thought to myself ''Yup, I'm dreaming alright.''

I then woke up pretty much instantly. However, I think this was due to the fact I had to wake up at 7, and I woke up about 2 minutues before because my sub-conscious didn't want the shock of the alarm.

Last night I had the strangest dreams. It first started out when a friend of mine threw a party at his house. We all arrived, but everything gets foggy after that. I do faintly remember working on my friends computer because of something, but I don't remember what.

The next dream was really choppy in terms of how things progressed. Sometimes it would continue forward only to spontaneously move back giving me deja vu. I can't quite recall specifics, but I do remember being at my aunts house converted into a now zombie proof bunker. The first day was when a warning was given out telling people to look for symptoms in your neighbors. However, I went out investigating how everyone else was doing. Most of the neighbors were doing fine from what I remember, but most of us were stranded in our homes because our cars didn't work. I soon returned to my aunts house after finishing up a conversation with everyone. When it became nighttime, I went back outside to the car to try and turn it on. The strange thing was, is that there was a breathalyzer machine on the car that was both "there" and not. Almost as if it was popping in and out of existence. I put the key into the ignition and attempted to start the car, but it was just making those clicking sounds. My aunt then came out to see what I was doing. I told her to go back inside so that she doesn't get attacked by zombies. Then things went back to when I was asking around in the neighborhood about the how they were doing. This time, it was different because everyone was working on their cars rather than just standing around. Somehow I got back into the bunker area of my aunts house when we both heard a knocking from the backyard door. We stepped outside and saw a reporter holding a high definition camera with a female assistant by him. He said that he needed to take our pictures to record history, but I looked up to find a half decaying man missing both his arms and one leg, just standing there, ominously. It scared the living daylights out of me. The reporter and assistant just stood their with a dumbfounded look on their face. I snapped at my aunt and motion for her to get back into the house when I was saved by the alarm going off on my phone thus waking me up. xD

At least I remembered more detail this time rather than length or plot. Still, I can't help but feel a little closer to achieving a lucid dream considering I noticed that breathalyzer phasing in and out. P:

I dreamt I was teaching a friend how to have better dream control. We were in a barren grey land on top of a cliff. I planted a small green tree which I moulded into a weird octopus shaped thing. I then showed her that we could fall without being hurt. We jumped off the cliff but when we he the ground we were in a dark forest, and the dream ended.

non dream - lucid - non lucid

I've had a lot of dream fragments related to this lately.
I dream them completely out of order, but they clearly belong together.
They're all non-lucid and play a few years in the future.
This is a try to connect them and fit them into chronological order, now that I feel I have enough fragments for everything to make sense.

• Working for NASA
  I own a company specializing in all kinds of modern computer toys.
  We mostly develop futuristic user interface hardware, but recently we've gotten into the development of air plane cockpits.
  Most companies want more modern hardware than what is currently used.
  It's not like our stuff is insanely more user friendly, but it looks much more futuristic and it isn't really more expensive than the traditional stuff.
  
  NASA hired us to design all user interface devices on a new experimental spacecraft.
  It's supposed to achieve high speeds using a small nuclear reactor powering experimental Magnetoplasmadynamic thrusters.
  This would allow traveling to close planets such as Mars in much more reasonable time frames.
  We're supposed to design everything in the cockpit, and all other interfaces all over the ship.
  We're also in charge of creating a simulator where pilots can train flying the spacecraft and to figure out what the most user friendly control to operate this thing are.
  
  NASA doesn't agree with some of my ideas. They prefer designs where the pilot has little control over the spacecraft for some reason.
  I don't understand this and most of my designs feature direct user input, such as a joystick to freely maneuver the ship.
  
  Although I'm not working for NASA directly, I still get to play with their stuff and I spend many hours in the simulator I'm designing.
  After some time we get the bad news.
  The government has canceled all funding for NASA, so the project is scrapped.
  This doesn't directly affect us since we get paid on a monthly basis, not on project success.
  I feel very sad though, I never understood why most people lost interest in space exploration after the first few Apollo missions, and now
  they're scrapping the whole program.
  ______
• Back to Europe
  I get a very interesting phone call from a company in Europe.
  They specialize in the development of nuclear fusion.
  The technology is solid, and produces clean renewable energy at an extremely efficient rate.
  However for some reason there exists nearly zero funding for this.
  I'm not sure if this is because it gets grouped in the "nuclear energy" category by the media and politics, which is stupid,
  or if there is some sort of conspiracy going on.
  The energy is clean, and the reaction doesn't produce hazardous radiation or any other dangerous by-product.
  
  Anyways, they want us to design the whole reactor controls and everything.
  They want a super futuristic look to help them finally convince the media that this is indeed the future of energy generation.
  This comes in handy because I was planning to move the company to Europe all along.
  The US military is pressuring me to work on fighter jets and similar things all the time, and it makes me very uncomfortable.
  
  After relocating to Switzerland I am working with said company on their reactor.
  They finally got the permission to build it. I also work on a supersonic airplane project.
  I enjoy working with everyone, they are not as secretive as the guys in America.
  They like explaining how all their stuff works and I get an immense insight into fusion reactions and supersonic airplane designs.
  ______
• Taking things into my own hands
  The fusion reactor is a huge success. Some people are still skeptic, but most governments are buying the green and renewable energy.
  I make a ridiculous amount of money on this project and also quite a bit on the supersonic airplane.
  I talk to the guys responsible for the airplane a lot because they also work for the ESA.
  I ask them how reasonable it would be to put a small fusion reactor onto a spaceship to power Magnetoplasmadynamic thrusters.
  They confirm that it would be much more reasonable than a nuclear reactor, and would save an insane amount of weight because you don't need
  the very heavy contamination to protect the crew from radiation.
  
  I tell him jokingly that I worked for NASA before and still have all the computer, simulator and user interface designs, we should get some sort of
  new project going.
  A few days later he comes into my office and acts quite secretive.
  He asks me if I was serious about those designs.
  I tell him we never officially sold them to NASA, so I still own all of them.
  He says I absolutely need to come to some sort of ESA meeting.
  
  I have to sign the biggest NDA I have seen in my entire life to enter the ESA meeting.
  It's over 200 pages long, I jokingly say that signing this feels like selling my soul.
  In the meeting I learn that the ESA isn't messing about.
  They have developed a technology that allows traveling faster than light, or rather work around the problems associated with approaching the speed of light.
  It's very technical and I don't understand most of it.
  It involves forming a bubble around the ship, it reminds me of Star Trek.
  
  Finally most people besides some company heads and ESA directors leave.
  I am requested to stay in the room.
  More technology is presented, and it is clear that the presentation is going towards a space ship project.
  It all sounds oddly reasonable, even though most involved technologies are somewhat experimental.
  
  The final problem that is mentioned is financing, ESA does not receive enough of it for a project of this magnitude.
  They want to do some small tests with drones followed by a manned mission into another solar system, using the FTL drive.
  I say that given my recent acquirements I'd be willing to develop all computer systems for free and even invest some money into the mission.
  A few more company heads follow this movement...
  ______
• FTL
  I am now working full time at a special facility used for this mission alone.
  It is absolutely huge.
  We launch the first FTL testing drone into space.
  I am sitting in mission control overlooking most of the technical systems.
  The drone is ready to test the FTL system.
  Everyone in mission control is extremely excited as we wait for the FTL countdown to run out.
  As the drone accelerates, our information becomes more and more delayed as it approaches the speed of light.
  All connections are quickly lost.
  But this was to be expected, we don't have technology to transmit information faster than light.
  The drone is supposed to fly ~1 light day within a few minutes, then stop and transmit a signal.
  If we have a position signal tomorrow we know it worked.
  ______
• Hyperdrive
  We've tested 3 drones now, each one with a better FTL system. The 3rd one worked absolutely flawlessly.
  The engineers have dubbed the system "Warp Drive".
  I have adopted this into the user interface for the spacecraft.
  The director is complaining about it, he says Warp Drive would be very appropriate due to the connection to Star Trek.
  I suggest calling it Hyperdrive instead. He seems pleased with that.
  ______
• Destiny
  All details of the project are clear now, and the ship is being built inside our facility.
  It uses a small but very powerful fusion reactor to power a new form of Magnetoplasmadynamic thrusters.
  It can generate an artificial gravity field, making life on board much easier, and enabling us to cancel out the extreme acceleration forces of the engine.
  Without this the passengers would be crushed by the g-forces during acceleration.
  It is also capable of atmospheric flight. It will fly into space by itself.
  This is actually necessary because it is way too big and heavy for a payload delivery system.
  It is also very solid, with a thick hull. This ship is not build around value for money.
  It looks very different than anything else we've send into space so far, compared to it everything looks extremely fragile.
  ESA plans a crew of 8 people for this mission.
  
  We're discussing the name of the ship.
  Someone suggests calling it "Ikarus", something about challenging destiny.
  I ask why not call it "Destiny" then? "Ikarus" has a bit of a negative vibe.
  ______
• Pilot
  I am playing around in the simulator.
  I often go into the simulator claiming to test stuff, but I'm actually picturing myself being a pilot on the mission.
  I bet everyone knows about it, but I don't care, it's way too much fun. I'm also quite good at it.
  
  The director intercepts me as I leave the simulator. He says we need to talk.
  We talk about how I know every detail about the ship, how I designed most of it.
  Then he says I have by far the best simulator scores, which surprises me a bit.
  He suddenly acts extremely serious.
  
  He offers me the position of captain on the mission, he wants me to fly the Destiny.
  My mind is blown, I immediately reply with "Yes!"
  He asks me if I'm sure, if I don't need to consider the risks.
  I tell him that this is absolutely not necessary, my decision is final and there isn't a doubt on my mind.
  ______
• Trouble
  The Destiny is nearing completion.
  All vital systems are installed, it's basically just missing the outer hull.
  But there is trouble. Some governments are voicing concern.
  The media throws some unreasonable accusations at us, that going faster than light might end the universe and whatnot.
  Telling them that we've already done it 3 times and the universe still exists does not calm them.
  I'm on some TV show defending against other random accusations, explaining why they make so sense.
  ______
• The Signal
  The director informs me that they have received a signal a few years ago, from an unknown source flying by earth.
  He shows me the data... it doesn't make any sense.
  According to the positioning of the source of the data it must have moved faster than light.
  It was broadcasting a specific position nonstop.
  The director tells me that it is assumed the signal was of alien origin.
  I finally understand why some governments are concerned with the mission, we are going to the location broadcasted by this most likely alien object.
  ______
• Lying
  Destiny is ready, so is the crew. The official launch is in 2 months, however we are actually going to launch in 2 days.
  I understand how governments are afraid of a mission that could potentially make contact with another species, but
  I really want to do this, and so does everyone else on the project.
  By faking a late launch date, and claiming that the construction of the Destiny isn't finished yet, we try to avoid the inevitable shutdown by the governments.
  ______
• Launch
  Launching the Destiny is incredibly easy.
  You just open the hangars of the construction facility and fly it out to space.
  This is why we were able to keep the launch date a secret until now.
  We haven't received any official "no-go" from any government, so technically launching isn't entirely illegal.
  We are going to get into trouble though, that much is clear.
  
  I'm sitting in the Destiny with my crew.
  I am the main Pilot, Nicole is my Co-Pilot. She had very good simulator scores and is a trained astronaut.
  She's never been to space though.
  There is an engineer on the crew to maintain the thrusters.
  The 5 remaining people are 4 scientists and a language/culture specialist.
  
  The hangar doors are open, everyone pointing a camera at the facility can now see that the construction is finished.
  We are fully fueled, ready to go, just waiting for the signal from mission command.
  The hangar is right at the end of a very long runway, so we can just roll out and launch.
  
  I'm very nervous when I get the signal to launch. Thankfully the process is entirely automated.
  We're slowly rolling out, after about 100m the MPDT engage.
  They are absolutely brutal, you can really feel how much power those things have even though they're operating below 0.1% of their capacity right now.
  They need to be though, the Destiny weights over 400 tons with fuel.
  I am really nervous as the Destiny finally takes off. It's not like I'm worried that something would go wrong, it's just the excitement.
  The ship climbs at a progressively faster rate and the thrusters become stronger and stronger.
  
  The beauty of starting to see the stars during the middle of the day calms me down though.
  I verify if everything is in order. Everything is perfect.
  We enter orbit and bring the ship into the correct position for the acceleration maneuver for FTL.
  ______
• Decision
  We're in orbit and in position.
  We have a video conversation open with mission control.
  They have just been told that we have to cancel the launch.
  We are ordered to come back down immediately. He obviously isn't pleased to announce this.
  Some official government type figure is with him demanding to comply immediately.
  They have voted a few minutes ago that the project is too dangerous... right...
  The mission director tells me to "try to cancel the acceleration maneuver".
  
  It is very clear what he's doing. The acceleration maneuver hasn't begun yet.
  He gives us the opportunity to say we cannot cancel it and continue on with the mission.
  I block communications and ask the rest of the crew if we should just go for it.
  Everyone agrees that we should.
  
  I enable the coms and tell the director that I am terribly sorry, but it is too late to cancel the acceleration sequence.
  The gov. guy gets really angry and demands that mission control remotely cancels the sequence.
  The director explains that this is impossible.
  Due to the nature of the mission, remote control would make no sense because we're out of reach most of the time anyways.
  The gov. guy is furious but accepts that he can't do anything.
  
  I activate the acceleration sequence. It is quite dramatic.
  Even though the artificial gravity field compensates most of the vibrations and the acceleration forces, it still feels extreme.
  We're being shaken violently and even though the ship indicates we are experiencing 3g of acceleration, it feels like much more, but it doesn't hurt the way more g's would.
  The acceleration maneuver lasts multiple hours. It is extremely tiring feeling such forces for so long.
  Finally, as we reach our wanted speed, the engines quiet down and the vibrations stop.
  We are now cruising about at many times the speed of light; the ship feels perfectly stable.
  Without looking outside you wouldn't be able to tell that we are racing at a mind-boggling speed.
  The outside looks very beautiful. The vision is distorted but very colorful.
  You just hear the gentle humming of the fusion reactor and the MPDT's working at very low power.
  We will arrive at our destination within approximately 2 weeks.
  Everyone is happy that everything worked out so far, and that we managed to actually pull it off.
  ______
• Travel
  I have had multiple dreams about the next 2 weeks.
  I'm either piloting the ship, which is basically just staring at instruments or doing some maintenance work on some ship components.
  So far everything is working fine, a few hiccups in diagnostics but that's about it.
  Nicole and I take shifts staring at instruments, even though if something goes wrong navigation wise, there's nothing we can do.
  You can't exactly make a course correction going many times the speed of light.
  I'm trying not to think about what would happen if the hyperdrive fails. The truth is no one knows, but it most likely wouldn't end well.
  We're all wondering what waits for us at the rendezvous point, or if there is anything at all.
  I think I'm the only one fully expecting something or someone to wait for us at the rendezvous point.
  I'm convinced that signal a few years ago was form an alien probe designed to catch the attention of species capable of FTL travel.
  
  I'm usually just sitting in my seat staring at what seems to be stars rushing by, wondering what's going to happen next.
  I occasionally glimpse at the instruments. They always display that everything is alright and that we're on the correct course.
  It's oddly boring, but the excitement of what waits for us keeps me entertained.
  I sometimes wonder what's currently happening back home.