side notes

Non-lucid, Lucid, [Commentary made while awake]

I'm on a street in a bright, sunny city when I realize that I'm dreaming. Pleased and excited to be lucid (as always), I stop and take a look around. I'm at a T-intersection, and on one corner is a big, tall building with businesses on the bottom few floors and apartments on the upper floors. It's white, with a red roof and other colorful accents. I turn to my right and see that its twin is on the other corner of the intersection.

There's probably a mirror in there somewhere that I can go through, I think. I approach the first building and go in the first door I find, a single door that has the name and logo of my real-life credit union on it. I go inside, and it is, indeed, a branch of said credit union. Almost everyone I see inside is a friend from real life, mostly from church, and I say hello to them as they walk past on their way out the door, but they don't seem to take any notice of me.

The main room of the branch is very small and narrow. I walk through it, turn a corner, walk down a very short hallway, turn another corner, and find a room with a rectangular, wall-sized mirror covering a fairly large area of one wall.

I stand facing the mirror. What do I want to be on the other side? I think to myself. One of the places I've lived before. I step forward confidently and easily go right through the mirror. I don't feel anything at all from it this time.

There's nothing but a completely empty, black void on the other side. When I'm all the way through the mirror, I find that while there's no floor, instead of falling down, I'm sinking down very slowly. Suddenly, I feel an overwhelming rush of profound thoughts and knowledge coming at me out of the void, while at the same time, it transforms from completely black and empty to a starfield of white stars. I'm frightened, and feel like all this is too much to handle, so I feel behind me with my hands for the edge of the mirror. [I'm now in a seated position, though I don't specifically remember getting into it.] I find the edge of the mirror and use my arms to pull myself up and out of the mirror, back where things are at least recognizable as normal. [No, I don't remember any of the content of those profound thoughts, just that it was like a tidal wave.]

[Side note: Woohoo! This is the first time I've ever completed the Task of the Month for two consecutive months! ]

Lights shone from the side of a bus window warms my body.

There is none of the usual hubbub,
But only silence exists in this suburb city,
The bus is driving without a driver,
Heading to a place unknown.

I am the last person to stand on this earth.

I stepped off from the driverless bus
Only to find a bubble gum machine
Filled with rainbow coloured balls.

Everything feels like……Charlie and the Chocolate factory.

Long shadows overlap my view,
I turn to see…… two giraffes.
This definitely must be a dream.

I am perplexed
For I never had a dream as awake as this one.

One of the smaller giraffes blankly stares at my eyes.
What do giraffes sound like?
Awkward silence fills the atmosphere.

Fluffy fur ~ So Cuuute ~~~ ♥

The black eyes twinkled with moisture
Reminding me….. …..

Just then
Clumsy footsteps with clouds of dust,
Notify its presence

I turn to see a herd of humans……?
Darwin’s way of human evolution
Stares at me for a long time.

Are they waiting…… who…… me?

I guess it’s true that you are getting stronger in a jail.

Soooo boring…..
I’ve been sleeping half a day
(That is 12 hours, 720 minutes, 43200 seconds of sleep) x 3 days ~!!!!

Tormented with rambling thoughts
I decided to train my weakening muscles and dispersing mentality
Sit ups become handstands to push ups.

2167, 2168, 2169 …… he he
Now that I think of it… it’s sooo nice in here without any harm…

Eh?
Disturbed mind disturb a motion.

“Hm… two thousand nine hundred thirteen…?”
I must have murmured this out loud, for all of sudden an old speaker on the wall starts to creak
Then NEET, lazy voice of panda leisurely says

“It’s two thousand eight hundred and forty, ass-hole.”
I startled and stumbled to the back
And heard some more mumbling over the speaker

Probably a mouth full of sugar coated cheese cake …
I am positively sure that his blood is made out of sugar.
Sweet treat for mosquitoes.
May you be blessed with them, Amen.

Comes to think of it…… wait a sec… … you

“Not a stalker.”
So you mind read now? Then…

“Simple thinking pattern, once in every 0.84 seconds, do the math.”

I agree
............“Is… is that so…”
.....................................reluctantly.

Can’t figure what this stupid genius is thinking.

“Same here”

I REALLY don’t like him.

<-- Detective L, the Panda

Attached Thumbnails

 

One icy winter night,
I questioned her around the corner where even cars scarcely drive.

It is upsetting to admit this,
But she hears my words one ear to another.

Giving a hollow snort and empty smirk,
She blankly stares at some unknown place.

“Ever been into a bottomless pit?”
Orange street lights shone her side,
Hiding the other half of her sorrow.

“No I just… you’re keep getting hur…….t”
A black car passes, leaving its red light on her.

“Don’t you dare.”
Like a knife chopping a vegetable,
She looks straight into my eyes and firmly says

“E.v.e.r.”

With her conclusion,
She takes a deep breath and jumps from the rail road.
Like always, showing her back to my side,
She goes far away to a place I do not know.

What is the burden you carry on your small back?
The question dims with the white steam of breath.

“There is no exit.”
She seems to be self-mocking her own fault.

Well, I was supposed to stay until Saturday but the fire in the Springs caused us to have an evac out of the Academy so I got back early.

Anyways, dreamwise it was pretty uneventful. First off, in my room there was a swamp cooler right next to the bunks and we weren't allowed to turn it off. Basically, we froze to death and it was really hard to fall asleep. Once you did it was really hard to stay asleep too because you would wake up and wonder what time it was (not allowed to have watches) and if your Flight Sergeant was about to blow the air horn in your room to wake you up.

When I DID stay asleep long enough to have some dreams, I just kept having dreams *cough*nightmares*cough* about doing drill and being yelled at by my First Sergeant a bunch, my boots giving me massive blisters, my BDU's ripping and other things among the many horrors that could happen at a CAP encampment. So ya, those are really the only dreams I remember because we also had to get up at somewhere between 4:30 and 6:00 I'm guessing and go do PT so I didn't have time to focus on dreaming.

To be honest though, I really didn't want to have any real good dreams or lucid ones while I was gone because I wouldn't have a place to record them and might forget some important details, and I wanted to focus on the encampment itself. But now that I can actually sleep in my own bed I am going to go work on dreaming again.

This is a dream I would pay money to remember in exact detail. It was very vivid, gritty, emotional, and at times completely irrational. Again, I want to blame something for my poor recall. So I mention this is additional support for my theory that: irrational dreams are especially forgettable. At the end of the dream things got super weird and my recall of those events is very spotty.

A detailed beginning is completely forgotten:

I was in a very old, run down, poorly light blue, futuristic indoor complex. It was large and imposing but looked darkened and vacant. I was determined to release a group of people from some kind of stasis prison. I seemed to know exactly where to go. I used some kind of stealth device to sneak into a giant room filled with rows of beds with wavy metal gates. I would say at least 60-people in rows stacked to the ceiling were in this large medical-like room.

In the middle of the room, off to one side against the wall was a brightly (white) illuminated bed. The guard I was sneaking up on was laying on it with a blanket trembling with fear. I was going to knock him out when I noticed he was fixated on a point deeper into the room. When I looked I saw what he saw.. It was a ghost. A cloudy looking young man with an outstretched arm walking towards him in a distressed looking manner. I remember thinking, what are the odds I would come to release these people and a ghost would show up?

There was a panel on the guards bed with an orange LED on it. I twisted the knob and all the bed grates began to slowly lower at the same time. The guard saw me when my stealth wrinkled. He was so terrified by the apparition he made no attempt to stop me.

Things go completely hazy at this point...

Next thing I know I am about to enter a "very" haunted area of the complex. I had a powerful high-tech camera with a large screen that allowed me to see in the dark. It was not the ugly green infrared look, it was a pale blue display and it was strikingly clear. When I looked without the camera, everything was almost pitch black. The hall was at least 20ft wide, went forward about 15ft leading to a small set of two or three stairs to a split-level hall leading to the left. The hall had many doors. I remember heavy dust in the air. Long rips in the carpets and clawed looking walls. It was much, much older and worn down than the rest of the complex.

No sooner had I taken a few steps down the hall when I saw a flare of light on the camera. Then, a terrible sounding groaning noise started down the hall and two shabby looking ghosts turned the corner heading towards me. I put down the camera and looked. I saw nothing but I could hear the weird, disturbing moaning getting closer.

This was too much. I hurried out of the hall the way I came. I shut the wooden doors behind me. I could still hear the moaning getting closer. I was standing in a bustling police station. Apparently, the "haunted wing" of the police station had been condemned... I announced, "Two ghosts are following me." Everyone reacted with irritation. I stepped away from the door and turned around. I could see the broken yellow police tape on the door.

To my shock, the two homeless looking ghosts appeared in front of the door looking at me. I heard men yell with fear in the station. Somebody shot some kind of energy weapon that exploded sparks of light everywhere and one ghost vanished.

At this point the dream gets very irrational and unstable. There was some weird thing about shooting a boot. A large plastic shotgun. And some huge super cop that could out perform everyone in the station, including me. I'm almost certain he "took out" the first ghost , and, took out the second ghost in a spectacular way which replayed/repeated like a sports highlight. --Then I woke up.

Note: This dream has many common elements/dream signs: police, prison, desolate future, undead, LCD, and long halls. Even the poorly recalled super cop seemed like a trickster.

1) A minister prayed for me and black goo came out of my hands and vanished. I felt cleansed and at peace. Then my bro in law, A, was suspect. We convinced him and his wife. She said ew get it out. The minister said I had to do it but I didn't believe. in myself enough. It was only partial and he saw paralyzed with fear as the black goo ran from his hands.

* religious dreams have a deeper meaning to me. This dream was about some negative emotions and stress at my job. It is up to me to have a different attitude.

2) My wife kids and I were at an annual carnival. it was huge this year with rides. I think my wife is pregnant and she can't ride. I felt bad for her. I see my ex and her mom. oh great look who it is. I wonder around looking for addmission prices. A security guard stops me and tells me I can't cut in line. I tell him I. just want to know admission prices. He says he's doesn't know. I ask him why he's such an ass? He says alright fine its $2.

* Both dreams very vivid and deatailed. I left details out because of time.

This is a strange one. I dreamed that my husband and I were having some work done on the back of our house. He had hired two guys to do most of the work. One of them was an older, short and kind of stocky man from Mexico. He apparently had a crush on me and liked to follow me around. Nighttime came, and my husband and I were getting ready for bed. The workers were supposed to have left much earlier. I was turning out the lights in the kitchen when I saw someone move outside the window. I shut off the lights immediately and ran to hide in the front part of the house. It looked like the worker with the crush, but why was he there so late? Suddenly, I heard footsteps. He had gotten in the house somehow! I hid in a small bed and covered myself with blankets. Surely he couldn't see me or know I was there in the dark. The footsteps got closer and closer and louder. Finally, I could tell he was in the room with me. I was near panic. I was could tell he was close by, and I was afraid he would try to restrain me. My heart was pounding. I wanted to scream so my husband could hear me, but no sound would come out. He kissed my ear instead.

I woke up immediately from this dream and sat up in bed. To my horror, there was someone standing beside my bed! I thought it was a home invasion. I jumped so hard and grabbed my husband with both arms. For once, he did not wake up. The figure looked like a tall and rather thin young man. He jumped back when I moved and appeared to be rather cowed, as if he had not meant to frighten me. We stared at each other for what seemed like a long while. It was dark, but I could see his form, just not his face. Then he faded away like mist. It was about 2:30 am. My heart pounded for awhile after this. My chest hurt like I was going to have a heart attack.

Perhaps my brain was slow to regain consciousness and my dream was pasted over reality somehow? If this was so, then why did the man change from how he looked in the dream? Why was I able to stare at him for so long? Or he could have been a ghostly visitor perhaps, and my brain made up the dream as a result of his visit?

First some side notes: I attempted to WILD last night but I thought I heard my phone vibrate and I was like "Oh, a text message".. it sounded just like it but it wasn't even my phone. It's driving me crazy that I checked my phone. I decided to go back to bed and try later in the morning because I had not slept yet. Ok, I know it works better when we have already slept for some time.. but darn.. I should of figured it was the auditory hypnagogia and just continued with it. I never got that far before. (I say that because I never heard so many sounds. I did hear other sounds to by the way.) I planned to do FILD, but I set my alarm clock to go off during 2 different times of the night and I set it incorrectly so it didn't go off either time. (Mom would have heard it if it did!)

Last night I had two dream fragments, both non-lucid.

The first was this:
I was in the kitchen by the toaster. There were two bags of granola. I was thinking "I guess Dad bought these two bags while we were down in Amish Country." My dad was next to me and I asked him if I could use the granola as/for cereal. He said I could. I don't know what happened next, but logical speaking I would have took the milk out and a bowl because I like to eat that type of cereal.

The second:

I was reading about recovering HDs on Wikipedia. I remember reading that it is possible to recover 40GB hard drives. Anything larger that than that (such as 160GB HD like they stated) has almost no chance of being recovered in the case of drive failure. I didn't like hearing that...

On a side note, my hard drive had a mechanical failure over a month ago and it is larger than 40 or 160GB by far and I still need to take it in to recover the data. For the past two or three days, I have been reading all about hard drives on Wikipedia and a few other sites.

I think my music teacher kidnapped me, all I remember was sitting on a strange and unknown bed in an unknown place, I am texting my friend and I can remember I was writing "I can't tell you" Then my music teacher brings me food, then there's a different scene this time it's outside my school and I'm doing a science project and then I see him in a car smiling at me. I can't remember which order the scene came in.

THE OLD MAN'S HOUSE
I was walking around a town with my friend. He was a DC who I've never even seen in real life. It felt like it was almost Halloween and the sun was setting. He saw an old house and we walked around to the back yard. It was surrounded on two sides by an old wooden fence and had a mini inflatable pool and an small, broken swingset. Closer to the house, the ground turned into a wooden floor that looked like it was rotting, and there was a big sliding door on that side of the house. We looked inside and saw a dark living room with a big rocking chair facing a TV. The whole house looked haunted. My friend wanted to go inside so we walk around to the front. I tell him it's not a good idea, but he goes through the side door. I'm inside now and he's upstairs. We explore the house some and go back to the back yard. There's an old man on the chair now and I'm trying not to be noticed. The way out of the back porch seems so far away, like the back yard turned into a long hallway. I make it through without getting caught and we walk away.

DEILD...ALMOST
I woke up and reminded myself not to move so that I could lucid dream. After what seemed like only a minute, I felt like a fell through my bed. I've done this before, but I wansn't expecting it to happen. I was excited that it was working though, and I tried to picture where I wanted my dream to take place. I remember imagining some open field covered with colored round bumps. After that I fell asleep, but didn't go into a lucid dream. I don't remember going into any dream. Sad day...

FRAGMENT
I remember something about a zombie. There wasn't a zombie in the dream though. Just someone talking about a zombie. Or something. Yeah...


Task for Tomorrow: Successful DEILD.

Well, I really had a pretty awful night last night in terms of dreams. I can recall a few fragments but nothing really worth writing down. I had to drive two hours for a CAP meeting, then drive back and I didn't get home until 11:00. So ya, it was pretty late before I got to sleep.

Now I am going to go to the Air Force Academy for a CAP encampment. It should be pretty sweet but I won't have time to focus on lucid dreaming. Go to bed at 10:30 and get up at 4:30. Yuck! I wil be gone for a whole week. So ya, wish me luck!

Woke 1pm
Flew along street, morning foggy whitish light. Quite Lovely.

ZOMBIE ALIEN MOVIE
I'm watching a movie. (Or maybe I'm in the movie, it's hard to tell.) A man with brown curly hair who looks kind of crazy is talking to his son while we walk onto a beach. This beach has been in so many of my dreams, I'm surprised I didn't recognize I was dreaming. The sand is full of rocks and shells and it's slightly chilly. The sky is darkened like it was going to rain. The man is talking to his son about zombies. I don't remember the first part of the conversation.
"Now, why couldn't the first zombie be from Kansas City?" akss the father. Kansas city was where we were talking.
"Because he would have to be infected by another zombie and wouldn't be the first," answers the son.
"Very good."
The father goes on to explain that patient zero has to be an alien species from another planet. He then takes of his mask to reveal that he's not human, but a creature that looks like a mix of Batman, Venom from Spiderman, and some crazy smiling cartoon character. He is a zombie alien.
He jumps (or flys maybe) toward a portal in the sky made of spinning clouds and lightning. The camera dramatically zooms in on his face and the movie looks more like an anime show now. He looks down at the boy and yells, "Wanna kill some humans?" The camera jumps to the boy, who now looks like a younger version of the alien, with the background like an anime fight scene. "Yeah!" he yells back excitedly. The father flys to the middle of the portal, where about ten superheros are sitting in wooden chairs and relaxing. "Batman!" He throws Batman out of the portal, to the ground. "Superman!" The same happens to Superman. "Mickey Mouse!" Mickey Mouse, with his sidekick, is also thrown to the ground. The sidekick makes a joke about Mickey purposely getting thrown out to try to hurt him while foating toward the ground in a bathtub with an umbrella. I woke up shortly after.

BEAUTIFUL MINECRAFT
I'm trying to install a mod on Minecraft. I create a new map to test it. I downloaded the wrong mod. I don't remember what I wanted it to do. The world is half hills with no trees and half dessert and thick forests spread out around the paths. The creator of the mod says to me through his microphone that it should work right. I tell him it isn't what I expected.
I'm now in the game, but it doesn't look like Minecraft. The forests are realistic and there are no blocks. The hills are smooth an beautiful and look mowed like a golf course (but there's no detail in the grass, the ground it perfectly smooth.) The green grass beautifully blends with the white sand and I walk down a path surrounded by the trees. The path splits many times but I always choose the path that is closest to the sun. Eventually, I find a large open plain up to the horizon with no more forests I see a few animals and maybe a village in the distance. I hear Mary's Song by Taylor Swift playing in the background (which is weird because I've only heard that song a couple times) and I notice that I'm dreaming, but I'm not really aware of the fact. I think to myself that the music is coming from my room in real life so I wake myself up. There is no music playing. And I completely forgot about lucid dreaming...


Task for Tomorrow: Have a lucid dream.

I also drank a glass of OJ, glass of apple juice and a glass of milk. I hear thats some good stuff for dreaming and sleep. I did this at about 9:00.

Well I continued on with the B6 and Magnesium as well as adding in B12 with the usual gian glass of water. Didn't seem to have any negative effects so I guess I will continue on with that. I did this at about 10:30.

Went to sleep at 11:00

I had been reading in the forums and came across that thread that is something like "Want lucids now? I can help..." and read about the timer thing. I think it is a really good idea and could work for me because I am used to listening to stuff anyways. I recoreded the timer with Audacity only out to the last 20 min. interval. I didn't want it infinitely repeating so that is why I did that. I am in a good habit of waking up at night after my REM cycles so I figured I would get some sleep and then start the timer. This must of been a false awakening because I could of sworn that I got up, checked the time, and it was 2:34. I also make vioce recordings on my MP3 player when I get up of my dreams. So I did that and was like "Ok, I guess I will start the timer now." So I go back to sleep. Next thing I know, its morning. I am thinking "What the heck? I set the timer and nothing happened. Didn't wake me up once. I even set it to do nine beeps!" Then I decideed to check my MP3 player. I didn't have any new recordings and the playlist was still on the binaural beats even though I had set it to the alarm.
Lesson learned... DO REALITY CHEKCS EVERY TIME YOU "WAKE UP".

So I guess I pretty much just slept right through the whole night.

Got up at 7:30