lucid

I was tired that evening and I massaged a calf to my wife. After about half an hour I felt I'm losing comprehension of reality(my body was falling to sleep).
So I laid down and started to relax... it went fast to generate feeling of heaviness and heat in my body, to lose feelings from body sensors... To lose thoughts. Only consciousness remained. I was point of consciousness floating in white shining space, in clean light.(Normally I'm in black space, this was something new But black space doesn't mean that I'm in any kind of discomfort. The feeling of peace is the same.)
Time was running around me, but I didn't feel timeflow. I was existing in shining light, in peace, without thoughts. After about one hour my wife tried to wake me up , she needed help with our children. What she managed was, that I started to comprehend physical world... but only sounds from it. I started to feel my body, dimly. It was hot and very relaxed. I told my wife that I need help to stand up, that I don't have strong contact with my body. But I said it probably only into astral world.
I pushed my will inside my legs and arms to move them, but instead, I did fast full separation into astral world probably. I projected inside my room, only it was all shining white. I moved around a little, floating. My wife was shouting again for me. I went back to my body to try to move physical body. I couldn't move it a millimeter. My body felt very tired and relaxed. I tried again to tell my wife that I need help to stand up to reconnect faster with my body. I found up that I can't move with ane muscle. I pushed my mouth to open a little and tried to speak, but my vocal chords were not functioning. I concentrated on them then... I managed to move muscles on vocal chords, but no sound was going out. I found up that I don't breathe fast enough... there wasn't pressure of air to resonate on the vocal chords. My cycle of breath in/out was longer than 30 seconds... and with very slow air movement. I couldn't speak with that. In the physical world that is. But I heard myself speaking despite of that. Probably into astral. I found out that I don't have control of my lungs.
I tried again to move my hands and again I was out in shining white astral. Therefore I pushed my consciousness back into my body again. My consciousness was steering itself automatically to shut down any disruption of state of clean existence. Into peaceful thoughtless state. I pushed my will into my body limbs again despite of resistance. My real me wanted something else- going back into meditation. But I knew I need to stand up. I managed to rotate physical body to side of bed and partially down of bed. It took a few minutes to get feeling of gravity and balance strong enough to stand up, to fasten breathing, to strengthen and control muscles.

Normally I do things different. Normally I try to stay in astral. As long as possible. This was new experience
Despite how this looks like, this wasn't traumatizing experience. Yeah, I had problems to regain control of my body. But that was because of tiredness and because I didn't really want to go back. I never wanted to go back from astral, from that peaceful place. I would ditch my body if that is possible probably long time ago. But I have responsibilities. Therefore it is not priority But again, if possibility emerged, I would do it in that state of consciousness without thinking.

I woke up on a buildings roof, and god am I afraid of heights. It seemed as if a party was going on on the floor below me, and I looked around. At this point I wasn't lucid. It seemed to me to be Dubai, the way this building was and looking around that's what it looked like to me. The only other person on the roof with me was a woman, the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I don't remember her face, but I can tell you, this woman was gorgeous. We exchanged conversation, and I asked her how to get off the roof. (This was a HUGE sky scraper). She hugged me, held on, and jumped off the edge with me. I actually felt my stomach lurch as we were falling so fast. Then we landed. Softly. I was surprised. At this point my conscious mind was questioning the dream, but wasn't lucid - yet. She took hold of my hand and asked me what I wanted to do, so we walked around for a little bit and found a beach with jet skis. We got on them and road them for the majority of the dream, enjoying the BEAUTIFUL weather (I could feel the warmth hitting my back, the water splashing on me as I rode the jet ski). I was in paradise. I loved it. I had this gorgeous woman with me and I was on the beach jet skiing, two of my favorite things! Suddenly it looked like it was about to storm. I was enjoying this dream so much that I actually attained LUCIDITY!! for a couple moments. I looked around, acknowledged my surroundings, and tried to stop the storms with all my might, even though it was one of my firsts times being lucid I just looked closed my eyes and willed it to stop. It ended up turning into a wall, almost like a simulation that turned off. That was when my dream started to end, we left and found ourselves in a conference room. (I wasn't lucid anymore at this point). I seen that my dream was fading and told her(I was semi-lucid now), and we kissed, just a simple on the lips kiss, she said goodbye, and I woke up.
The best dream ever.

5.25.15

bed 11:20 am - 9:45pm with 3 or so potty breaks

First time in a while I remember dreams from the whole time I was asleep.

DILD?
I'm walking on a street and I see a pink bunny, no fur, walking on his front legs, upside down. I stop in my track and stare at him. He asks me something like "what you looking at?" and I say "are you for real?". He just looks at me as it is for me to figure it out. I ask him "am I dreaming?" and I look at my hands. I say "yes, I am dreaming" and I remember how just that night before bed I wanted to get lucid.

I don't remember any strong happiness. But I didn't have that in some of my later DILDs either. So I immediatelly leave the scene and start climbing up on the outside of a house. It's like from fairy tales. Lots of wooden design on the house so it's easy to find a foothold and grab something with hands. I easily climb to the top.

I look to another house adjacent to this one. That one is modern, concrete and glass. I stick my head in the open window and say :hello, anybody home?" while I know they are home. I look down and I'm 3 stories high, so I know it will startle them. I start talking about how I like their light colored furniture that has some dark streaks in it. They tell me they could pick that one on one with pink streaks, but I lose interest and leave.

Not sure if still lucid here, probobly not. But me and my dad are building a flying machine out of kitchen chairs. Just attaching 2 behind each other, powered by dream power. I think we actually take it for a spin, or I just describe to him how it would be to be flying.

NEXT dream
I'm with many people. One of them is my friend from school, with some elements from Ophelia. I'm asking her if she still has the "wow" moment when she gets lucid, and she says yes. I'm still trying to figure out if I the previous dream was lucid. We talk about lucids for a while. Someone is giving a lecture while we sit at the tables and talk some more.

There were more dreams, but I only commited these to memory.

Get This Girl Away From Me

I appeared on a table in my brother's room. Except I thought it was my room.I felt sleepy and like I had just woken up but I couldn't move. I felt someone putting pressure onto my head with their hand and thought my brother or someone else had poisoned me and was trying to get rid of me by causing a concussion to my head. "I got to move!" I thought to myself. Than I started feeling someone stapling my head multiple times.

"Okay, this can't be a real thing going on. No ones stupid enough to try stapling my head to try and kill me. I'm in a dream". I thought to myself. But it still felt pretty real.I looked up and saw an alien face looking down at me on the ceiling. I took it as a form of insult and a reflection of one of my biggest fears. I looked to my side the best i could and saw a small wooden house was stapling my head. Somehow I managed to get out the room and went up the stairs with a fork in my hand. I looked back to make sure my thoughts hadn't formed a creature. Than went into my parents room where I was handed a bowl of strawberrys and yogurt. I ate it but than I reappeared on the table.I could only see my hand, tools and what looked like a yellow robot like body.

I heard it picking up tools and felt it touching me," Is this gonna be one of those alien dissection dreams?" I thought. I prayed a bit to get rid of my fears than focused on going through the walls. I felt the robot using the tool on me a bit but I couldn't just lay there and let the robot do that to me in the dream. It was uncomfortable. I managed to get through the wall a bit and turned to see the robot melting. I kicked him a bit than went through the wall. When I stood up I saw a man and two other dream characters that were girls. They were telling me to go back inside the room and that they were going to hold me down.

I told them they had to listen to me and thought that maybe dream characters would have an inclined respect for God. " I prayed to Jehovah because I didn't want to be in there. So you have to listen!" I told them. "Who the heck is Jehovah?" asked a dream character than the other laughed. I was surprised at the lack of respect they had and told them " I can't pray to get rid of you because it would be like getting rid of a part of me so act more nicer. I have to think good thoughts anyways so this will be a good opportunity."

Suddenly the tall girl with the wavy, long black hair was acting very hype. I decided to leave the scenery, think I went through the window or the stairs. The setting was changing so its hard to recall where i was. Anyways I started thinking of finding Dawn and could feel the girl was following me.I was flying above a park/urban city at night. I could see a children's swing and heard people talking in the park. I looked around till I saw Dawn wearing a white long sleeve dress shirt, a dark grey tie, black pants and black dress shoes. He was walking holding green flowers in his hands."Dawn!!!" I called out to him. He turned and smiled at me than said " Lety!! Its good to see you!".

Than he walked to a chubby kid wearing a grey/white sweater and sweat pants telling him to go down the stairs than inside the house. They were next to a gate where it kind of looked like stairs that lead to the garbage area of a building. But there are some people who do live in that area of a building. Anyways the girl with the wavy black hair came running after me and she was super hyper. She was telling me how she wanted to do hurtful things to me. I flew away and climbed over a large door where i saw a beautiful scenery of a pasture with the sun hitting it. But the girl was annoying me.

I moved to a different part of the dream world where it started becoming more like a house interior. I could hear a familiar little girl's voice telling the girl with wavy black hair how she wanted to staple me. Their voices were in high speed and they sounded like they were high on sugar. I went through a window in the room than found myself in a bathroom like place with its own showers. The girl with black hair found me and showed me a long, pink pen that she wanted to stab my hand with. " Let me just try to change this with words and I'll think about a different outcome instead." I thought.

I showed her my hand and asked her to use the pen like thing to draw who she thought I liked more as my favorite guide. Eye or Dawn. She started drawing on it and said "Eyesti! No wait!..." I looked away after that than looked back at my hand and she showed me what looked like a kanji symbol on the top of my left hand mixed with two other kanji symbols. "What is this supposed to mean!? Whose my favorite guide was the question." I told her. She laughed than drew a small moon on my hand and said " Jackie Chan is your fav guide!" than she ran to some other dream characters where they talked about injecting penicillin into their bodies. I flew up to the top of the showers than the girl with the black hair came in with the other girls.I thought they wouldn't harm me because they would be distracted by the showers but than the girl with the wavy black hair came up to me and stabbed my upper left feet with a needle. It hurt so I kicked her than I woke myself up after that.

I think I handled the dream character situation somewhat well but it could have been better.It was just too random for me.
- w - I seriously was reminded why I hate dum dream characters.

Walking through some kind of store like a Home Depot when I decided to do a reality check but it was funny because I thought to myself that I was definitely awake. I looked at my hands and said "am I awake" and realized immediately I was dreaming. I didn't really know what I wanted to do, but my youngest son was in the dream with me so I picked him up and asked him, "do you wasn't to fly?" I wrapped him in a blanket (I think he was younger than he is now) and we began to fly around. First we flew around inside then we took off through a window over the water and then over snow. When I landed into a room I was alone again. There was a closet door standing open so I decided my father would behind the door but when I moved the door away it wasn't my dad but a nondescript, androgynous person who seemed to have my dads essence. I went into his arms and we danced slowly a little bit. I would catch his reflection as we went around and the DC was ageing and beginning to look more like my dad. At some point here I slipped back into a dream. Not what I wanted to do in my next LD, but that's ok. I just couldn't remember what it was that I wanted to accomplish in my next LD while I was in it! (I want to meet my inner child or a dream guide). The other thing is that this LD had a very dream-like feel to it. In the past I've been able to become more and more lucid as the dream went on, but in this dream I was lucid but nothing was very vivid.

So last night I dreamt that I was walking down my road to the end of it. However,it was all dark out and my former Spanish teacher was walking the opposite direction. She had on a jean jacket,if I remember correctly,and I think black pants. I don't remember what I said to her,but apparently whatever it was it made her laugh. Well,she then said something else to me as we were passing one another. Once I got to the end of my road,I do remember looking back a her and watching her as she walked away,becoming smaller until she disappeared.

For the majority of the dream, I was in my house.

The dream started with me in my room and going outside to find a mirror. I noticed right away that my face in the mirror was weird and distorted, and I realized I was dreaming. The more I looked at my face in the mirror, the more twisted and distorted it became, but I was actually able to shape it. I spent a few moments trying to see how much I could alter my face, eventually making it disappear altogether by flattening it. I then walked around outside to find the neighborhood to be filled with lights on front lawns.

When I went back to my house, my cousin was in my room, and my room was rearranged but I didn't care because I knew it wasn't real anyway. I was really amazing at how detailed everything was and how realistic it all seemed.

Then I'm at a theater with various friends and I'm watching a movie about Captain America being trapped at the bottom of an ocean. That's when I lost Lucidity.

Sunday had a very lengthy LD series for me! I am loving this!!
Sat, 23 May 2015:
*another good "any moment could be a dream" example! I am towards the back of our house talking with my wife and son I remove some coins from my pocket and drop them in a small pile of coins. I don't believe anything strange or dreamlike happened at all. I believe the trigger was simply what I have been reminding myself throughout the day in my day practices, that any moment could be a dream! I I'm thinking along those lines and I decide to see if I can float up and I can and I start flying. I fly over our back yard and think of locating Girl Friday. I reflect on how much it felt like I was completely in the waking world before I started flying and I thought for a moment what if I'm just visualizing this so I look to see how crisp the visuals really are and I definitely realize that they are too solid to be visualization and I am happy but the dream visuals are not fading as I'm flying but I do decide I should slow down just in case. I see a house up and to the left and I decide that will be where Girl Friday will be. I drop down to the window and look in and the house is completely empty. I try to look away and then back in but my dream starts fading and I end up back in bed. #328



Sun, 24 May 2015:
Quick notes but also waited half the day to start recording my dreams. I did create a quick mnemonic device to remember the various scenes but should have recorded more details right away.
-something in big long indoor warehouse and I realize I can just fly, I am dreaming and I take off flying and a circle back around to continue flying in this indoor scape this fades after a little bit to me trying to stay in the dream realm, wandering through the void and hopefully into another scene.
-school classroom I am looking for a seat. there is 1 that's part of the double desk like all the others but someone is already on the other side but I have no choice as I see the other desks are all full. Hug my good friend intimately and tell her it must be weird for her but I really like her (semi-lucid possibly).
-waves to 4th story splashing. We are standing on a rooftop 4th story and waves come crashing over

but mostly just risking getting a little wet as most of the waves don't make it up there. we go down and we mention what's happening with the waves and a lady says that's why they don't allow structures to be built on top of cliffs. Upon waking, I reflect on how I missed the dream sign.
-complex: we're trying to go up in elevator I believe for floors once again the elevator entrance is packed and there's a long line and I see a side door labeled stairs and say let's just go up the stairs but when we open the door it's an entrance to an elevator and I wonder if this is a service elevator we go in it anyway and it stops at the next floor which feels like the one where we saw the long line and a bunch of people try to cram in. one person gets out but somebody else gets in but the doors won't close and me and my friend say let us out he gets out first but people are still in my way and by the time I get out I'm having trouble finding him and I'm going through these halls and I see some random guy in a lab coat. I start to call out for him but then I realize that this is a dream scenario and I decide this will be cool to explore this huge complex I seem to be in. I go through different passageways through big wide halls. I start thinking it would be nice to run into a beautiful woman in here and wouldn't you know around the corner comes a beautiful if not somewhat girl next door with longish curly hair brownish blonde. I reach out for her and tell her you are the one I've been waiting for, we have been waiting for each other and we start making out. I decide to bring another female in on the action and a sexy female appears in a black outfit. She has short black leather shorts that are very tight and sheer black stockings with high heels - also black, and a tight black top.

She has dark brown hair and when I tell her I want her

Spoiler for sexual content:

to lick my mate's p***y

and she gets very excited and gets to work. After we had our fun I started exploring the complex again. At one point I see something cool through some glass windows

but no door so I decide to phase through. It seems to be working but then I get stuck in the molecular structure of the glass and then into the void but I'm used to this situation and know it can lead me to a brand new scene.
-mall I'm excited to find that I have arrived at a very busy 2-story mall full of plenty of DC's to choose from!

I walk through the crowd looking for as suitable mate. I see one cute girl walking the other way in a very crowded pathway and try to get her to stop but she is resistant and keeps walking the other way. I keep looking but it seems most of the DC's are either too young or too old . As I am passing the food court it gets particularly crowded and I'm squeezing between bodies of people and I decide it's time to float up above the crowd. I fly over all of the DC's looking for a beautiful mate and I get to the edge railing and look down and it looks more interesting on the floor down below.

I sweep up over the railing and down to the floor below but the visuals start fading so I float back up reaching for the railing hoping visuals will come back. I wake and adjust my position in bed and reflect on my dreams. A little later:
-construction I end up in a building that looks like it's under construction

and there are a crew of guys testing fire sprinkler system and I can hear them feeling it up with water. I hear the sound pipes make when water is rushing through them . I go different ways into this building to see if there's anything interesting but it is kind of drab so I start looking for the exit and there is one which it's like a big long covered porch open air. I start flying through this area to the outside which is a city scene. there are some trees and some hills in the distance but the first thing I see is a sign that says something First Baptist Church. I fly forward and I can hear some voices behind me and I look back and I can see for figures taking off flying from the same spot I did coming up behind me

so I slow down to greet the first two to arrive.
they are to younger girls and I ask them who is that behind them. one says that is our protective father. their father is flying with their young sibling in his hands.

He looks like a big ,strong, foreboding pale vampire with light hair maybe white or gray but I have no fear. I wake up shortly after. I woke and repositioned to a more comfortable position between several of these LD scenes, so I am counting 3 LD's. #329-331

This felt like I was in the dream realm for a big chunk of my night! I wake up feeling like I have lived so many experiences in one night much like a lot of my recent LD's with the G+C combo (8mg+500mg).

Reason why I haven't been posting is that it's been about a month since my last lucid dream, before this one
Short one but might be the end of my dry spell.

Lucidity: 7/10
Control: 5/10
Vivacity: 7/10

I'm talking to Jacky Chan on a beach (lol). The ocean's to my right and to my left is a tropical forest. There are coconuts lying on the ground. The guy asks me to lucid dream, I decide to WILD .

I close my eyes and in an instant, I find myself in a playground like the one I used to go to when I was a kid. I feel the dream is very unstable and I try to stabilize, but soon I can't even move my "dream muscles" and I "wake back up" on the Island. I do an in-dream DEILD.

I'm back in the playground, and I decide to just have some fun jumping around. I want to jump to a rail which is about twice as far as I could jump IRL. I decide to use the only reliable flying technique for me, but just to enhance my jumps. As i push off the platform, I focus on a feeling in my whole body; it feels like my whole body is being dragged across the air, like I am magnetized upwards. I do a few more jumps like this and "wake up" again and deild. Until I wake up.

Just a quick post to record a LD I had a few nights ago...

I am with old friend Carrie at her house. There are streams running from room to room and we are riding inner tubes. We are having some conversation, but get interrupted by a phone call. As she talks I look around and notice that we are flowing out the front door into a river. I look around then up. I see the day time moon with a shining set of rings around it. The rings start rotating around and I recognize this dream sign (odd things in the sky) and I know that I am dreaming.

I notice that my wife is now with us on her own inner tube. Being lucid I think that I should do something with this dream so I stand up in the water and try to think. While I stand there my wife goes into the water and starts sucking my finger. I pull my hand away and then put it back. She starts sucking again and I absentmindedly feel around in her mouth. I am so shocked that I don't even know what to do with this dream. I just stand there unable to think with my finger in her mouth until I wake up.

Thu, 21 May 2015:
1st feel transitioned to dream but float to confirm. Slow! Yes. Darkish. Wife gets out of bed and goes to toilet. I wonder if she did in waking and go in front of toilet and dance around to see if I get a reaction. Not really but she looks up and either she has no face or it is blurred and hard to make out. Shortly after back in bed needing to turn over.

Later after a WBTB, I get comfortable. I feel I have transitioned again but when I make a small move to get out of bed it feels like I risk moving my waking body and waking up. I try to float again but nothing and then I mentally push my whole body towards the right front corner of my bad and my dream by jumps up on to the corner of the bed! I walk out of the room this time and out to the loft

and I think about my day time visualization: floating up and then over the loft and I do. I float down to the landing or ledge where we could display items but we don't. From there I float down to the floor. I get some audio of my son asking me what I'm doing but I know it's just from the dream I head to front door and I walk out. Before I walk out I can hear what sounds like a crowd of people outside and I like that I will be able to walk through the crowd and pick out some beautiful DC's! as I walk out there is a crowd and I find one girl.

Spoiler for sexual content:

Stick it in her mouth

and then I think how I wanted and planned to go about things like this more consensually. I cross the street and there are 3 women wearing choir robes like you might see in church. I think about the church connection but continue over there with my dirty intentions. I look at them with the look that I know they all want a piece of me and one by one they go to work

Spoiler for sexual content:

on my ahem. They make it grow larger and larger with the skillful pleasuring using their mouths and tongues and one of them comments how big it is getting. this goes on for several minutes and at one point I notice that one of the women has a vagina on her lower stomach. odd but not freaky, as I reflect how I am fully aware that this is all my dream. I talk about how one of them needs to get on and take a ride

and there's a little girl nearby that approaches and starts crying. I decided I had enough and switched to consoling her. I no longer felt like I was naked but neither did I put on any clothes or really consider this. I tried to commit to memory what she was saying as she was crying but that part is gone. She hugs me back as she cries.

I walked back to the other side of the street and there was another woman crying a little more gently, whereas the girl was more sobbing. I was going through the dream details in my head to better commit them to memory when I felt what was a false awakening but I wasn't sure at first. I was back in my bed and my wife was playfully touching my arm but then started tickling me under my arm and I kind of moan like she is going to wake me up but I tried to feel if I was still asleep and decided that indeed I was. I did an in dream wild again (like earlier in the month) closing my dream eyes until a new scene forms through my closed dream eyes or maybe I open them up gently but either way I was in a long room not very wide but plenty of space. There were a number of pieces of equipment to the end of the room in front of me and this pilot or astronaut in a suit

like a pressure suit and there was a small one man rocket or flight craft that was warming up its' engines

and pointing towards the ceiling though there wasn't really a ceiling or a sky but mind you this all felt very indoors. he gets down from the rocket contraption having started the warm up process and is talking to me and something in my head makes me wonder what they wear under that suit and he hears my thoughts and unzips his outfit and shows me that he is naked underneath. I see his penis and everything. he's zips it back up and continues to prepare. I look back towards the part of the room I was in before that was basically behind me when I was facing the astronaut guy and my son is sitting and doing his studies and back towards where the astronaut was there is now a TV and something risque is on TV. it seems to be some r-rated version of MTV where some chunky lady is walking around without a top on. I start to lose a little lucidity here as I wonder if we should change the channel but after a bit I realized it doesn't matter regaining some lucidity. I start thinking about how it seems like the scene is going on for a long time and I start thinking about my goals. I jump to memory peg number 5 and after a bit of a scene fade I find myself standing over my wife

who is sitting in a chair in our dining room. number 5 is the smell task of the month and I remember how I smelled her hair earlier in the day freshly washed with a nice scent to it and the dream seems to replicate the scent but it was a little more faint almost as if the dream accounted for the time that has passed since the fresh washing of the hair. I then think about how I reset memory peg number 2 back to the lucid dare to become a tree and I start stretching out my arms like the branches of the tree and my feet down like the roots and I get the sensation of my torso and arms growing and expanding upwards

but I'm not too sure how much of a tree I became with no mirror around. I then thought of memory peg number 6 and this is the talking to the monster under your bed for task of the month. I decide that there is a bed just ahead and I walk that way but I don't see one and the dream is fading a bit and I decide that I will just arrive back in bed, my dream bed and then I can get out of bed and talk to the monster from there but it doesn't work and I soon find myself back in my actual bed needing to urinate but I stay still and try to reenter the dream but eventually realize I am too wake and need to relieve myself before trying anything else. when I go back to bed I do get a lot of great visualisations that seem to take legs which like in my previous LD aftermath several days ago I wondered if I might be in a dream state with the amount of effect I have over what seems like HH's. very long lucid series! 8 milligrams of G + 500 milligrams of choline. #326 & 327

I'm sorry I haven't posted for a while, I wasn't recording my dreams in a DJ for absolutely no good reason. But tonight I had a very good lucid dream, and (half?) completed one of my dream milestones..

Need food

I had a dream where I was in a restaurant-like place. There were lots of people around me and a couple of them really wanted food. The guy at the counter (who wasn't exactly working at the restaurant) was already in the process of making some and the people were surprised. They started eating some so I left down the street to an alley. The alley went downstairs into a sort of restaurant as well. There were lots of tables around and one table was where they were selling the food. I was supposed to get some sort of vaccination before coming here because there was a chance to catch a virus, but the people around me were wearing gloves so I thought that would suffice as protection. I went to grab a pair of them and then left to get some of the food, and I can't remember what happens after here.

Car crash

I was in a bus. The bus was going up this street slope, and all around the bottom were flat plains with lots of yellow flowers. There was a turn on the slope and the bus was going too fast, and it fell off the edge to fall down on the plains. On impact, I was sent outside, on the ground near the broken bus. Many people who were in the bus at the time were moaning in pain, and in particular I can recall a young boy who was directly under the bus. In contrast, the worst I felt was light-headed, but nothing more.

You're my subconscious, aren't you?

I was in this platformer game similar to the N flash game, and I was also the character in there. I was jumping around when I just suddenly knew I was dreaming. The game started going at very high speeds, and was starting to glitch out and the scene changed, but I retained lucidity. I was on the front yard of a house I can't recognize. My brother is there with me, and for some reason he was really bugging me about something. He kept trying to get my attention and I was so irritated by it that I threatened to kill him with a knife, because he wasn't real anyway. I had my knife at his throat, but I couldn't bring myself to kill him. I don't know if it's because I didn't like the idea, even if it was a dream, or I wasn't completely lucid, but I eventually decided to ignore him and left to walk down the street. I met a friend of mine down there and he said he wanted me to go with him to a restaurant. I accepted and while we were walking I started to view the scenery. It was very vivid, with detailed buildings and city electric cords going across town. I was thinking if I should do one of my dream goals and could recall slaying a dragon. I tried to summon a dragon several times by closing my eyes and opening them again, and was careful not to open my real eyes, but the best I could do was make a puff of smoke in the air and a man's scream. Where did the person's scream even come from? I decided to try again another time and my friend and I entered the restaurant. There were high chairs, like the one you'd see in bars, across the counter and a display case showing pancakes. My friend was ordering some and I was standing at a corner waiting for him to finish up. I started losing lucidity here from the normality of the scene but I caught myself and regained it. The dream started to fade out and I kept calm to get ready to DEILD.

Woke up, got right back into the dream.

I was in my room. I didn't get up from bed, but rather I was standing in the middle. There was a person I thought to be my other brother cowering under a blanket in the corner of the room. I didn't really mind him and started towards the door. This intense feeling came over me, so I came over to the person and asked this question completely on instinct:

"You're my subconscious, aren't you?"

To my surprise, a small black female teen came out and replied with yes. She came over to me and gave a short kiss. For a weird reason I thought she wanted to take it further and I was getting my "bottom part" ready when she ran out of the room to another nearby one. Embarrassed, I followed her and she was sitting on the bed. I recall asking two questions, one being, "do you keep my memories and all other related information?" and the other I can't forget, but it was related to it. She replied with a simple, "yeah". May have to rethink her being my subconscious, but I'm not doubting her yet. For the time being, I'll keep the milestone for it unchecked. We both left downstairs and I saw my sister, but didn't mind her. My subconscious laid down on a table and because her appearance wasn't what I had in mind, I was giving commands on what to change, but before I could finish or do another DEILD the dream faded away.

Successful MILD + DEILD.

< Don't worry, you don't have to read the whole thing to comment >

Sat, 16 May 2015:
SSILD: maybe I was already asleep because when I thought I was still trying to get to sleep, I was noticing how the things I was imagining were folding into my HI's. I was having unusual control over them or influence of the HI's so maybe a short NREM stage. I lost track of my awareness though until a little later.
I am in a home setting that is unfamiliar when I look back from waking perspective recording this dream. I'm in a family room and my son and his girlfriend and others are there including members of my extended family. At some point I seem to be losing clothes and end up in my underwear. It seems like my son's girlfriend is trying to go look at my junk bouncing around in my underwear. I don't want my son to see that so I move behind the couch. At one point everyone starts looking at me like I did something wrong and my first thought is what did I do? But then I realized this is a dream scenario! I am dreaming! My son's girlfriend comes over to me as I'm sitting on a chair and leans over me and I can see down her blouse . her breasts seem smaller than in waking life, though I'm only guessing, because I've never seen her naked of course…except in dreams that is. The previous one with her started off non lucid and I felt so guilty! Some of those feelings came in here but I mentally reminded myself that this is just a dream. (Memory gap) we are driving in the van with openings between the two front seats and my wife is getting frisky

Spoiler for sexual content:

reaching down into my underwear

and this cute lady in a short skirt is in the backseat pretending that she is sleeping but I can see her eye slightly peeked open. I think of her joining in and regain my lucidity . (memory gap) I'm in a new house and there is a lady actually it's the same lady from the backseat and she has a baby in arms and a little girl who is maybe 5 to 7 years old. I talk to the baby and wonder if I disturbed his sleep. I have lost my awareness again. ( memory gap) she's going home and she is outside of her door holding the baby carrying something else and trying to deal with her little girl and I asked her if she needs help. she says sure and brightens up her smile and tells me to come on in!

this is when I realize I'm dreaming again and get my awareness back. she is sitting on a chair and her short skirt alluringly and the kids are now gone. start

Spoiler for sexual content:

taking off my clothes and running my hands up her skirt and removing her blouse. Some level of sex

before another memory gap. A guy brings me outside and wants to show me something. We take off flying. He says we are passing over England and Manchester City. I look over at him and it is my son.

We are flying together high up in the sky. I wonder if we are high enough that I can see the shape of the British Isles and after moments of looking for it I am suddenly in a blank space with a solitary standing elephant-dude figurine. Primarily colored in soft blue and white.

Several memory gaps, perhaps my awareness work needs to be stepped back up during the day and have come to rely on the G + C combination which I did not take this night. I really wanted to be lucid tonight because I wanted and natural lucid dream before my next G experiment the next night. On the other hand I am hopeful that this could be some sign of "breaking down the wall" that Thomas Yuschak speaks of. #323



Sun, 17 May 2015:
*Longish dream+DILD: we are in some foreign country, possibly India and I am waiting in our vehicle at a small airport drop off area and the doors are locked but after a little while people start trying to open the doors and before long many people are trying to open the doors. one guy gets in and then lets another in and soon the truck is packed. It is like a van sized SUV. One last guy crams in and I thought he was going to sit on top of me or something but he went crawling to the back. I was in the front passenger seat. one of the guys that got in started driving. He seems to be the patriarch of this family and he is driving too fast and I told him to be careful driving so close to the other cars. I asked him what is going on, why is everyone so frantic? he says that the Muslims want to vote (so I assume that they are protesting and rioting). I think to myself why were they not allowed to vote? This goes into a false awakening where all of the people in the van and some additional people are in a big room sleeping and people are starting to get up and wake up and I notice how dark it is. I asked couple of girls near me why is everyone getting up? What time do you go to bed? And one answered sometimes 12 or 1 and then I realized I asked the wrong question. what time do you usually wake up? and she answered around 8. I see a clock or somehow know that it's 6 a.m. and I ask why is everyone getting up at 6 a.m. then? No answer, but some one by the window says but there is an aurora borealis happening right now. I say "well I'll get up for that!" I go to the window where they are peeking through the blinds. aluminum style 1 inch or 1 and half inch blinds. I look up and all of the clouds in the sky seem to be glowing a little bit but I don't see what he's referring to at first and then I notice the lower set of clouds closer to the horizon are glowing more so and the colors are undulating. As I look more, it gets more impressive!

I say out loud this must be a dream! Somebody sees react like yeah yeah. I try to look at my hands but it is too dark in the room although it does look like there is something about my hands I moved to the nose pinch RC can do it several times to be surebefore I think about starting to mount various women in front of all these people. I'm able to breathe through my pinched nose and I lookout after night display some more. it is so beautiful! Let's start shooting back and forth across the sky along with a laser gun sound effect that is interesting but the lights are so beautiful! After a while of looking at it i turn my attention to looking for a suitable mate and walk through the room passing several girls that are too young including a little blonde girl . I see a beautiful girl, probably 20's, holding the hands of two younger girls and leading them into a room.

Spoiler for BEWARE-negative schema (but resolved). NOT sexual content:

I go in as well and the door closes and I turn around and they're gone and it is like a small closet with the walls painted yellow. I think about the podcast I listen to last night and it seems to plant a seed have negative things happening sometimes in LD's but I stay calm. I open the door I'm behind the door is just a yellow wall like the rest of the closet and I try to avoid thoughts of being trapped and

I decide I will just fly up through the roof and I do! This leads me to a series of different scenes all seemingly underground with no windows but some more interesting than others. one was wide open and what would look like maybe a big space station somewhere on a planet perhaps

and I spend a bit of time flying quickly through there enjoying flying indoors. At one point I came to somewhat of a dead end but there was an opening that led to a very dark hallway and I wasn't interested in exploring that way

so I turned around and flew some more and eventually I fly into another scene. This next one was full of DC's. They all look like military or worker guys in dark blue jumpsuits

and I think about how in the podcast Sensei talks about how in some place, some powers don't work and sure enough here I don't have all of my normal dream super powers. I take a few swings at two of the guys and they kind of laugh at me. one guy takes me by the arm almost as if I'm being arrested or at least taken out of there. he's a boisterous guy that seems like a bit of an asshole . we look across the room and theres is a guy dressed a little differently, dressed like a movie star in casual attire. the guy who grabbed my arm says that guy is an asshole. As we approach I feel like messing with them and I start to say hey this guy says you're an... But the guy fills in and says something like yeah he is a whole lot of something trying to playoff what he really said about him using words that sounded a bit like what he really said, "a whole." I chime in and said no he called you an asshole. I think I'm forgetting some parts but at some point I feel myself back in bed and with a strong urge to reposition myself off of my sore left shoulder. After trying to stay still for a few minutes I eventually have to turn over and maybe I waited too long because my shoulder is still sore. It was worth it though! #324

empowering non-lucid: Water park amusement park bathroom mini golf. Guy kicks my wife. I fight him though he is bigger. Guy says they will break up fight if I get off him. I do but guy starts fighting me again and I quickly break his neck with head twist.



Mon, 18 May 2015:
Later driving into fancy neighborhood #lostMyWay trying to find my car parked outside. Became a covered area suddenly from aerial view (map?).
Go into a big resort like place and try to pass through to get to where we are heading. #Wife #son security system starts to drop down as if I am not authorized to pass but moves back up as I back away, then down again as I approach. Finally a flying droid thing stays with me until #security arrives. He holds a fork like stick to my balls while questioning me. Must you? I ask. Later they let me go and with family back inside car and I think about how dream like that was...why didn't I RC? I should now! Hands hmmm...look away and look again
..yeah I just counted 6?...hard to see one of my fingers!Nose pinch yep! Tell family I'm going to take off and fly out of car a little and see youngish girl reminds me of one I saw that day. I walk up and I remember my plan to make it feel okay and remove any negative thoughts and ask the girl (brownish blonde, more blonde) to take off her clothes.

Spoiler for Strong Sexual Content & language:

She takes her time easing onto my c**k. We have sex for a while. Wife and son looking at one point. I brush it off, they are only DCs. I even tell my wife you like watching me f**k this young one, don't you? I think as I am doing it that I should make sure I don't carry this fantasy over to waking life and say something like that to my wife during sex or when feeling frisky. I lightly squeeze and rub the girl's nipples and she is kissing me a lot all over so I pull up my shirt which is only thing left on me with the idea that she can lick my nipples and she does almost instantly.

5-6min count as 5 for contest. #325

Late am btb: HI's to quasi dreams? Very good fantasy visualizations with GF and C and friend. Later even said time to RC...hand look 3 times but then quickly felt back in bed so didn't count as a separate LD.

20 May Lucid
I was outside of some warehouse building with a group of others. There was a large metal door that was red or orangish in color around us. We were just outside hanging out, me and another guy were closer and there were three or four others. The outside was green grass and not fully level ground but no trees or anything else around. There were little mounds possibly some dirt showing, not very detailed. Another guy rode up on a bike and kind of past us, I think I had a weird feeling about him. Suddenly just his bike rode towards us and crashed into the wall of the building. I quickly got away from the area we were in thinking we were about to get attached. I was the only one to really move. I watched for a little while and there was no action. I got a kind of moment of clarity and did a finger check. There have been these points in a dream where I am beginning to realize it is a dream. It is more in 3rd person almost and I have to force it to go into 1st person so I have arms and whatnot. I was lucid, I reached my arms out and touched the grass. I thought that I need to slow down and focus and remember something I want to do and not just go with no goal in other recent dreams I have had. I really wanted to get stable and clear in the dream and a good thought as to what I wanted to do. I found some items on the ground and really went through them and touched them with my hands. There were large bolts and some tools so I touched those and picked them up felt their curves and points. I decided to try phasing again. I have had no luck with this in the past so I had an idea to keep telling myself it wasn’t there and it was a clout or mist that I could walk straight through. I walked around the building so I could see the door again. On the way around I thought I might see people I was with before but it was desolate. I walked right up to the door all the while thinking about phasing, I approached I was telling myself it wasn’t even there and oddly enough I went straight through it. I did a fist pump and walked down a hall in a large warehouse. I touched the walls inside since I felt a little unstable after the phase and cleared the dream a bit. I didn’t have any other goals at this point so I was really just exploring. The ceilings were very high and the warehouse was pretty dirty, may have been industrial as well. I peeked into a couple rooms looking for people and found no one. I approached another door that I was going to phase through but right when I got up on it I realized it was unlocked and partially open so I just pushed it open with my shoulder. I checked a couple more rooms and ran into one with a bunch of people in it, I yelled hoping to surprise them and got mostly looks of disgust. I woke up shortly after this and don’t remember any more.

1 May Lucid
This may have been a DEILD since I was pretty much lucid right away. I am not writing this right after the dream so it is a little blurry and I am not sure what was before and after it. Before this I had some sort of conflict about people not wanting me around. I remember thinking how blurry things were and I was at some house outside. I was next to some rounded railings and rubbed them a little bit as an environmental interaction to clear up the dream. I did this and said “there it is”. I was LUCID at this point, I remembered before that I looked at a different house down the road and there were a ton of people down there, I kind of did a jump/float over to the house from my house. When I landed I picked up some rocks in the yard and rubbed them between my hands to clear up the dream a bit. I touched the rocks a couple of times, the rocks were fairly pointy and sharp. I got to the back of the house that I was heading to and no one was around. I thought of a task of the month and remembered the smelling one. I found a drawer inside the house and started to rummage through it. There was a lot of junk in it and I was looking for something that would smell. I ran across something that I thought would work but kept digging. I think ran across a grape lollipop and thought hey that should smell. I got it unwrapped it and took a big whiff, it was grapey but not as strong as I had though, I then put it in my mouth to taste and really didn’t taste like much either. I woke up shortly after this.

I was on the hill when I checked the RC. I counted 5 fingers, they were hard to count, so I knew that I was in a dream. I wanted to fly but I could not fly, because my lucidity was not high. I watched the surroundings for a few minutes. Then I woke up.