lucid

sometime in 2015
I was inside my parents house by the front door and I could here rain outside. I was dark out. I went outside having a feeling of deja vu. I looked at my hands and they were swirling. I remember that I always wanted to fly as high as I could while in a dream. I began to float upwards but lost momentum and was no longer flying up. I was just hovering. I found out I wasn't breathing. Every time I took a breath I flew a little higher. Now able to see the tops of the houses and the rain I continue to take deep breathes flying higher into the clouds. I can see the stars above and below the clouds fly away in swirling mists as I begin to see the shape of Earth at it's curving edges. I slow down into orbit miles above earths surface and gaze down at the dark side of the earth with it's christmas light pattern of light pollution and decide to fall back to Earth because I've had many dreams where I fall from high distances and land on my feet. I gain speed again but this time toward earth with increasing momentum. I feel a pit in my stomach and I begin to lose touch with reality hurling toward Earth. The dream fabric broke and I awoke.

I wish I had landed

...next time

sometime in 2014

The Castle

I woke up in an old castle where i would attend classes that were focused on me finding out what I wanted to do in life. The overall consensus was that I was not happy because I didn't know what I wanted to spend my whole life doing. But I think I began to question whether I really wanted to pick one thing. The monotony of spending the rest of my whole life doing one thing sounded like a hellish existence of repetition. I didn't even want to think about things before doing them at all at that point.

I liked the idea of free choice and pondering all the options and directions to go so I left the class and went downstairs. I heard the door up stairs open as this other classmate came down trying to get me to go back to class. I resisted and went around back the stairs where i saw these glowing shimmering lights. I went underneath into the shadow cast underside of the staircase and reached for these glowing objects but when I was about to grab them they shot out like streamers all around the room. I turned a corner and the classmate kept following me. I knew he was trying to get me back; at this point it seemed like by force. I was getting bad vibes, like the whole thing was controlled and I was in a prison like loony bin where the caretakers where to ones who had actually lost their minds. I ran into a dead end, turned around and the classmate was blocking the way saying I had to go back to class. I told him I had free choice and ran passed him toward the glass doors to the outside. I started to pick the lock looking out through the frosted glass into the green hue overtones of the outdoors, but gave this up and smashed the glass with my fist to save time being that I was being chased at this point.

I ran out across the grass and took an immediate left around the building where people were playing football as my classmate and a few others are chasing me yelling to catch me. The players are alerted and join the chase. I pick up speed and jump a fence into a hedge-maze where I take a few rights and a few lefts until i lose them. Then I realize that I'm lost myself and this feeling of being trapped for eternity sweeps in as I slowly loose consciousness...

I wake up in a bed in a small stuffy room with my mother sitting above me reading off a list of the symptoms that I have like "paranoia, anxiety, depression, deranged thoughts, loss of will, short-term memory loss" She's trying to help but it made me feel like the very act of a assuming these problems projected them on me. I felt like I was being diagnosed to the point that the diagnosis was creating the very symptoms they were focused on treating. The forced help mentality of projected mental health issues was what was in-sighting my paranoia that thereby drove me to jump straight out of the bed and run downstairs, back out through the glass door I had broke. I ran straight this time across into a huge field of old recycled cans. I was literally wading through aluminum cans where my feet wouldn't even touch the ground any more. The cans formed a hill and as I waded on the light became visible as I could see that the cans were piled against a wall. On top of the wall I looked out across a bay with a lighthouse in the distance. I jumped down onto the beach and sat in the lotus position looking at the waves. It was at this point that my body felt weird like I was electrically charged and I knew I was dreaming. I looked at my hands and they started to melt like I was on mushrooms, the overexposed high detail of my finger prints shifting and changing sizes. I looked up and my friend Sarah was here and she wanted to go swimming. I wanted to fly so I began to float upwards over the water as she swam. As I looked down I slowly began to sink further and further down into the water where I sank and woke up in real life to my fellow dreaming black cat Phantom sleeping on my chest.

This is just one of my lucid dreams that I've had that involves my main reoccurring dream-signs:

Getting Lost (Normally underground in tunnels)
Flying/ Falling (enjoy both when falling I like to land on my feet)
Being swept away by water beyond my control
A castle

Mild attempt before sleep and wbtb

*I was in the front of my apartment complex when a bird flew next to me. At this point I realize that I was dreaming and begin to gently pat the bird. Then after that another animal approached me and I also pet this animal is well. I did this with a couple of more animals and then the last animal that approached me was a very friendly Tiger that brushed himself against me, I thought as it was happening what if this is me embracing my primitive animalistic unconscious parts of my mind and making friends with these aspects. The dream ended.

05.12.2015

Finding Rare Item After One Kill in Adventure Quest (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

So I’m somehow playing Adventure Quest, a game I haven’t played in ages. I had to reset my password since I needed to see the name of the items I used to have that pertained to the dream.

I’m in a screen where they’re doing some special event for some new boss, and if you can defeat her, you have a chance to get a rare item. The base of her form looks like Whis at first glance, but she looks more diabolical than said individual. The main colors of her outfit were dark violet, black, yellow, and even red in a few locations; most likely the orb located at the center of her cleavage. She has blue skin, white hairstyle that resembles some myriad of an elf, and other otherworldly creatures. There’s a slight hint of an Inuyasha theme with her visage as well, and she’s holding this long scepter that resembles Sila’s staff.

The promo for her is her posing in front, and twisting her hips and legs slightly to the left hand side (looking at the screen), and holding the staff with both of her hands, and her visage has a generic sinister smile. She’s wearing earrings as well, and they’re probably white, or turquoise. I click on the button to challenge her, which it promptly does, but how she was presented in the promo vs. the actual fight was anticlimactic.

She looked like she was drawn by a 6 year old child, and her skin shifted from a light sea blue color to a milky, violet one with traces of pink. I noticed the interface is like the old-school format for Adventure Quest, and I checked her stats for a little bit, and noticed that she was obviously weak the Light attacks; 260-265% if memory serves me right.

I glanced over other attributes, but they ranged around 80-160%, and the Darkness attribute was at a 60%. I felt she was going to be fairly tough since I had the implication that my light spell was actually an amalgam of light and dark attacks that would be shot in rapid bursts. Even though I glanced over the stats, and knew at best it the darkness attacks would do little harm to her, I thought there would be some hidden, adverse effect for attack her with dark attacks, e.g., her being healed through it.

But no, it turns out that the moment I started to activate the spell, all of the shots ended up killing her. Then there’s the victory screen that I quickly skipped, and I saw that there’s a fancy black sword with a sinister aura. I collected it, but I think I was prompted to buy something on-screen. I’m not able to recall if it was just me wanting to buy more items, but I get the implication that I got the rare item for free, and I didn’t even feel it was rare up until another event occurred where people are trying to auto-buy it.

There was some kind of Call of Duty: Black Ops 3-esque interface where the sword is shown as an item received from the Crypto keys. The background base for the screen was a dirtied up white with a very subtle splatter of light gray spilled on top.

_________________________

05.12.2015

Slaying One-Eyed Blue Monster (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I’m walking down an icy area, and it seems oddly akin to a stage in Black Ops 3, but it was more diluted, and catered to a medieval theme. It had a painterly style to it while still looking somewhat realistic; like the PBR was applied pretty decently.

I’m wearing some kind of holy armor that’s white as the primary, and golden trimmings surrounding it. I’m holding a huge sword that looks like an amalgamation of the Biggoron sword and others, and has some kind of eye as the base near the bottom of the hilt. The eye was yellow, and had a cat-like pupil that’s black. I think there were transparent tentacles that were very thin fluctuating around the base of the hilt.

The sword seems to be fairly heavy, as I’m dragging it across the environment while making a dads towards a large, blue creature with one eye, and a small base to contain it that’s stuck on top of the shoulders. It’s coming at me, but I slash it once, and it quickly tries to run away. There’s an image of a random male that looks like one of the characters from the TF game for a split second surrounded by blue aura, and it goes back to the blue monster trying to run away from me. I prepare for another slash, but I can’t remember what happens next.

This morning I had an LD again . It is becoming a weekly thing I hope!

So far, most of my lucid dreams, I realize I'm dreaming when I notice odd things. I stopped doing reality checks in waking life, but I think doing them for a while made me notice signs better in dreams. I just feel like "Whoa, that's not real" or 'I'm not supposed to be here", and I become lucid, no special reality checks in the dream.


Here are some highlights and notes I'd like to remember:

• It was the longest LD I had so far. I did too many things and went to many places, so I don't remember all the details, just flashes.
• This time I had no false awakenings! The last few LDs were full of false awakenings, so I'm really glad they stopped, at least for now.
• I tried to summon a pen I saw on the floor to my hand, and it moved to my hand for a second then disappeared, but I still consider it a progress. I never summoned anything before except a door.
• I used many doors that took me to many different places, but I didn't try to control the scenes at all.
• I went to a beach at some point, and I was afraid to swim in the big sea as I feel in waking life. I knew it was a dream, but as with flying before I was afraid that my fear and negative expectations would result in a nightmare or wake me up.
• The beach was too crowded, and I had some fun with some DC friends, then some DC was drowning, so I though I could try to save her, I ran there and she was already saved, so I was relieved that I don't have to do it, but again illogical since in a dream it doesn't matter if she drowns!
• I changed my clothes at the beach by thinking about it. I changed into a bikini .
• I had a few girls running around with me going on different adventures. Mostly, one girl at a time, but they changed. For some reason that I don't remember, I didn't try to change that or control it. I even thought of them as friends not DCs which sounds very illogical to me now. Maybe I wasn't 100% in control of my thinking, but I was 100% aware I'm in a dream.
• I went into a big building (I think near the beach) and I used an elevator to find a quiet room to do some stuff with my friends (DCs) since there were too many people everywhere. When I went up everything looked consistent. I mean I was still in a building that looks the same, just a different floor.
• I just watched Vanilla Sky last night, and there was a scene when the lucid dreaming company's tech guy was telling Tom Cruise that he can control the crowd around him. When I reached the room I wanted, it was too full of dream characters like it is a conference room, and I wanted it for myself, so I told them to go. Some left, and some resisted, so I called security to take them out as a trick .
• Everywhere in the dream was too crowded! I usually don't meet many DCs in my dream. It was the first time I dealt with too many.
• At some point, after I kicked the people out of the room, it seemed like I forgot why I was looking for the room. I remember now, but in the dream I did something different, so I probably forgot the goal.
  
• In the room, I talked to my DC friend and asked her a question just for fun that was related to helping people heal, and she just said one irrelevant sentence, "People are unformidable, so I moved on.
• I am learning driving lately in waking life, so I was looking for a car to drive in the dream. I thought I'd steal one, then I thought "Oh, I can just buy one since I can summon money". But now I think I was already in some kind of a vehicle when I thought of that, but this part is foggy now since I woke up before I got to find a car.

Finally, I think that was the only dream that I actually had fun and adventures like I'm in a normal dream without stressing about changing things. The problem is that I don't remember myself making this decision in the dream, it just happened.
I recall making many decisions about things in the dream, but I moved with the flow most of the time. I don't know if that means I didn't have much control, or I just made that decision and I can't recall it.

Dream 1 - Carny (02:00)
There's a park and forest, a few snippets of a carny that I walked past (it resembled one I had seen a couple days ago). I also remember there being something about a dinosaur fossil in the ground, reminded me of a t-rex (probably due to going to the museum recently).

Dream experience: 0 (meh)
Dream awareness: 0 (meh)

Dream 2 - Black Leech (04:04)
I remember a meandering river flowing in a flood plain near some mountains. The flood plains were lightly forested and the river had some large rounded oval pebbles in the river bed.
Later I was in a neighbourhood where I live (not in RL), I remember thinking that some creepy guy might end up attacking me with a black leech/slug (it was about the length of a persons hand and quite thick). I looked out of my window to the neighbours house and saw that there was a black slug doing a little sideways scuttle up the inside of their window (it looked like it was trying to 'walk'). Poor thing, it's retarded, and it's struggling at the corner. I wake up (FA) and reach around to my back (with a pseudo arm) and touch the tip of what I imagined was the head of the slug. Ugh, I might die :/ damn. Though I'm not too panicked for some reason, like I know that nothing bad will happen. My reasoning is also that it's only halfway up my back so I can pull it off before it reaches the place it's supposed to bite to kill me. I think that creepy guy must have ordered it from the deep web. I kind of realize that all this is going on in my head and wake up properly.

Dream experience: 5 (pretty vivid, the leech was pretty interesting)
Dream awareness: 2 (a little more and I may have been lucid)

Dream 3 - Tripppyyy (05:33)
I woke up and tried recalling my dream, doing a mediocre job at it. I don't think I actually moved, and ended up doing an unintentional DEILD (does this mean I win Emnition? ). I was thinking about another lucid I have had in the past about Adventure Time (never happened). We were in a cart being pulled along and I was Finn, next to me was Jake the Dog (in full cartoon mode too). From the get go I was semi-lucid, knowing it was a dream without really properly thinking about it though. Things were a little.. trippy. Hmm, I want to be me though. I change perspective and become Jake now. Still not what I wanted, I look at Finn now and see a little mini Jake jumping around slowly, his colour looks darker than it should be, and I know that he isn't Jake because I'm Jake right now. I want to try be me again, so I slowly will my own body to be formed, I separate from Jake and move in between Finn and Jake, sitting between them on the moving cart. It's a weird thing to describe because I felt a bit.. formless, and things around me were still a bit trippy, I guess I should elaborate on the 'trippy' thing. Basically everything had a liquidness to it, seeming to have slightly shifting forms, unstable. Ugh, everything kind of intensifies slightly in that trippy state, to my right I look at Finn, hmmm? His chest now has... Boobs. They're growing and shrinking and moving around in slow-mo (not at all like a boob should). It reminds me of a slime monster or something. Both Finn and Jake are asleep on either side of me.. Things become way more lucid and I know I'm dreaming for sure but I have no way of taming the intense instability and liquidness of the dream. I reach out and grab Finns boobie. I feel it slightly but my sense of touch is a bit dim. I involuntarily float forward and turn towards him so we're more or less facing each other, but he dissolves into a new image. The whole world is changing around me like crazy. Colours and spiraling stuff.. It reforms into me looking at the side of a red car, just at where the petrol goes into. The cover over the petrol tank has a flat red face on it and it's smiling at me (same red as the car). What the? I give it a little slap/pat on its face and it keeps smiling at me. This is so weird. I try to properly stabilize the dream now, 'Stabilize!' I shout, I clap my hands, but did I? I feel like I'm clapping them in RL. Am I waking up? I open my eyes. Hmm.. That was, something? I decide not to move and keep my eyes closed, not because I wanted to re-enter the dream but because I wanted to listen to it fade away and feel the other sensations.
"tzzzzzzzzzzzz" a static fills the air and there's black and white tv-like shimmying lights in front of my eyes. Did I just DEILD again? Lots of faces start forming in the static, just black and white outlines. This scares me quite a bit and I feel like my heart sped up. "Calm down, something bad will happen if you think it will" I manage to quell some of the rising tension about my current state. The faces kind of dissole and the black and white static merges to a dark background. In the middle is the statue of a pharaoh looking at me, unmoving. It begins floating off to the side now, out of my line of sight. In front of me the dream world forms once more and I see a wrist resting on a table. The wrist has a watch on it, and I think it might possibly be my wrist. It must be late at night since the background is still quite dark. On the watch there are glowing numbers since it's digital, the number '7' sticks out to me. There are other things on it but it changes a bit too much so I don't bother with it. I think I tried getting up and moving a bit but I can't remember anything else and I think I woke up shortly after. It was still a bit unstable but not nearly as trippy as the last.

Dream experience: 8 (Wow so trippy, I think I've had trippy dreams before but this one takes the cake)
Dream awareness: 4-5 (I was completely aware I was lucid, I could control things but I couldn't stabilize or actually do things properly)

Dream fragments
- I remember there being a really long rope suspended like 100m in the air which a whole bunch of people (including me) were standing on, there was another rope above it which you could also hold onto. I remember seeing a video a while ago about a woman in a gym straightening her legs on a weight machine which caused her leg to uhh.. bend the wrong way? And pretty much snapped. It really grossed me out, why do people post that stuff on FB :/. Basically in the dream there was a guy who had a similar thing happen to him, he stood underneath the top rope and straightened his legs pushing it up, but the rope was too strong and pushed down.. It broke his legs and they bent the wrong way and he fell off and died. I remember thinking that he was an idiot though

-Something about alien civilization which has been buried, they had the ability to teleport.

Dream 4 - Heroin (07:38)
I remember thinking that the Nazis had one big regret during their time of power, I turn my head and look at a bunch of high school kids bustling to get into a big auditorium. Some had been locked out, but everyone was organised from tallest to smallest so the really short people were at the back (this meant mostly girls were at the back). I'm now a part of the school, and for some reason I had an idea to flirt around with those chicks who got locked out. I approach and the idea is gone and I'm now thinking of a way to get inside and decide to just teleport. I teleport in and open the door for everyone else. I think I'm a little annoyed with everything, and plan to hit the fire alarm and then make a run for it... There's cameras around though. I manage to find a way, I smash an alarm in then bolt out a door on the side of the auditorium just before the teacher could turn and see who did it. "Phew" I think, now I just need to avoid the cameras. I run around and skirt the edges of the auditorium to avoid the cameras, but they're the black orb type and I have the feeling that they can see everything around them. I rejoin the masses evacuating from the main entrance and follow them. But I see some students getting told off for doing their Maori dance hobby. "what the hell? Why can't they do it?" I wonder, I walk over to a white roguish character who seems to be in charge, and he tells me the story (which occurs in a flashback with me present). The teacher tells them they can't do it it for some lame reason like "it's because it's not official you can't do it as a playtime hobby" or something. I was annoyed, since I thought it was impressive for these guys to group together and form a dance group without any supervision. I can't remember what happens next.. But I think I'm talking to the white guy leader of the group, he's gotten into heroin now since they can't do the dance group. I try and smack some sense into him, he's going through withdrawal and wants another fix but I stop him. "Do you even know how much pain you'll be in when you're going through withdrawal? The spasms haven't even started yet. This is why people don't even let themselves do it once, because they get F*cked up" (I said something along those lines...). I also remember thinking of analogies, like how people say to try everything once, but I told the guy he shouldn't do heroin even once. I used the analogy of me falling off a cliff and how it can effect you for the rest of your life. Then I make heroin sound worse since it causes neural injuries rather than physical ones. There's another skin head dude hanging around who keeps squeezing heroin out of needles and shooting them like water pistols at me. What a dick. I think I end up doing heroin but I'm not sure why? When I wake up he's hovering over me and I get the feeling like he may have stabbed me with a dirty needle while I was passed out. This guy really is scary looking O_O.

Dream experience: 6 (felt pretty emotional during this, passionate about the dancers and trying to help them, it was quite vivid)
Dream awareness: 2 (only a little bit more and I may have been lucid)

I think my awareness rating is 0-2 = non-lucid and 3+ is lucid.

Last night was an astonishing night. Not just that I had 4 LDs, but that the quality of the dreams were leaps and bounds ahead of almost any other LD I've had, except some on galantamine. I did a few things differently this night:

Bedtime: approx 1:30am. Final out of bed: about 1:50pm (yup you read that right), wife woke me up because we had an appointment. Some time awake before post-lucid dreams.

Lucids occurred approx 8 am.

+ Moderate exercise a few hours before bed.

+ I got off the computer about an hour before bed.

+ I read about vipassana meditation ("Mindfulness In Plain English"), doing calming breathing while reading the book, before bed, including reading through some Universal Loving Friendliness recitations.

+ At bed time, instead of setting strong intention to recall dreams, get lucid, pay attention to the night, for a long time like I sometimes do, I took a different approach: I had a "conversation with my SC":

I know that you [my SC] knows how to dream. I do not need to "spend effort" to "make myself dream." Dreaming will happen naturally. All I have to do is notice it when it happens in order to get lucid. I would really love to be lucid in my dreams tonight!

Thank you for my dreaming experiences! Tonight, I would like to have beautiful dreams. Lovely landscapes full of beauty. [and maybe a request or two about romantic encounters , but mostly focusing on beauty]. Fun, beautiful, interesting dreams.

Also, I work on falling asleep using sivason's mantra breathing. I tell myself "I am…." on every inhale, and "…dreaming…" on every exhale. I really really try to let go of all tension and totally relax along with this, because typically reciting mantras keeps me awake.

So there was a strong current of both mental and physical relaxation involved. I fell asleep initially fairly quickly.

I had 4 phases of dreaming:

Early

Pre-lucid

Lucid

Post-lucid

I had longish wakings just before and after the Lucid period, but didn't get out of bed, I remained in bed and did recall. I went to sleep again using the mantra breathing "I am….", "dreaming." And "Remember, I am…", "…dreaming…"

Early:
I thought I had forgotten these entirely, but some just came back to me now as of this writing (in the evening).

+ outside building, trying to get in, I need my math books. MaEd (husband of CamEd, friend at work in college) brought them to me. There are also lots and lots of papers to read. I look through them and see words on the paper. Kind of blurry like a bad photocopy, but definitely visible. I think if you do all this reading you'll get a lot of extra credit. [Possibly day residue from watching "Modern Educayshun" video before bed].

There were more, but forgotten for now.

Pre-lucid:

+ the road
(walked too far, sit across from field up against a stone wall on sidewalk, dirty backpack, dirty (grass clippings) hat, brush it off, think people will consider me a hobo I'm so dirty. Crazy guy who works in the fields comes out, saying "HEY THAT'S MY SPOT" farmer in filed across the way says "yeah he always sits there to eat lunch." I don't get upset, I imagine sitting with him and having a conversation, [I think a result of Loving Friendliness recitations].

+ the mural
an artist is painting a mural on the wall. I think it is a rendition of human inner connective tissues, it is red and white, and it is lovely. Artist (woman?) runs her fingers along the lines of the paint, red paint in between white boundaries (or the other way around?), smoothing out the paint, making long curving lines. Then she is drawing artistic features at lightning speed. With a few strokes of her brush in a second, she can draw a full "heart", she draw several.
Then at the end, she submerges herself in the pool of water beneath a decorated Christmas tree, I have a top-down view of her sinking down and the reflections of the lights on the tree sparkle on the water.

+ sports field, conversation
There is a sort of party outside, young people are milling around. Someone was supposed to get the beer. There was a mixup? Someone had left it up to "the Mexican."
Approaching a sports field. Some even happening there? I stand above it.
There is a procession of beefy male football players down a narrow strip of field below me. One of then is really huge and fat. I think he's over 500 pounds. Man, how'd you like to play against a 500 pound opponent?! I walk around the corner and run along the other side. I make a running leap on to the long seat/couch on the lower side of the "field"/walkway. A girl up ahead to my right calls out "Seismic event!!" when I land. I say "hey!", I think it's rude of her to commend on my weight like that.

I'm lying there and some people come up to me. Women in their 30's they seem like. Several come up and there are some conversations. Then MiSe (conductor, undergrad university orchestra) is there. He's wearing a knit cap that is pulled down just over his eyes which are slightly visible beneath the cap. His eyes seem red and kind of weird. I wonder if they're stuck to the hat. I want to boast to these women we're talking to about me playing in the university orchestra, but I don't say that.

+ DILD, LD#158 TOTM basic II (laugh in a DC's face)

I walk into kitchen of childhood home [don't realize it yet]. It is dark/night. As soon as I step on to the floor I glide slowly across the room. This grabs my attention. I think the floor must have been recently oiled. I realize this is my childhood home's kitchen, I'm looking down at the floor and it seems a bit too large, missing some items, like things were taking away to clean the floor. The linoleum has random dots/drops on it for decoration. I'm just really liking this gliding: I take one step forwards and I glide all the way to the other side, slowly. How can this be happening? I step out of the kitchen into the living room Oh, I know: I'm dreaming! (nose pinch confirms). I'm very happy to be lucid. I think about narrating the dream but don't. I think of TOTM: laugh in a DCs face. My parents are right upstairs! I'll do the laugh one. Dream only slightly unstable at first, but solidifies. Go upstairs and down hallway to my parents' bedroom, the door is closed. Hey, I'll be able to see my mom! I open the door and say "Mom? Dad?" in a sort of little boy lost voice. Two people are in bed, they both sit bolt upright and look at me in surprise. Instead of mom and dad, through, there are two of my dads there. I think briefly this is because my mom passed away and I can't therefore see here. The duplicate dad disappears. My dad is sitting on his knees upright in the bed. I go right up in bed next to him, his face close to mine. He appears 20-30 years younger than he is now. I start laughing with a sort of high-pitched voice, looking into his eyes. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…" for about 10-15 seconds. He looks sad and a bit confused. Maybe says something once. When I stop laughing, he flops back down into bed on his face, exasperated. Satisfied I've done the ask, I leave and go downstairs.

At some point approaching the dining room I lose visuals. It's like visuals are "stuck" at a scene in the upstairs hallway. I can still feel things in the location in the house where I know I am. I consider going back upstairs so that my location matches the stuck image in my mind as a way to unstick it. I go into the kitchen again and look at the floor and the visuals are back. I'm gliding across the room, and I notice that the pattern on the floor has changed: long lines now arranged in groups at right angles. I turn around and glide back towards the dining room and notice that there is also a new color suddenly on the linoleum [peach, pinkish?].

I go out the sliding glass door onto the deck. I notice with satisfaction that the view of the city lights below looks very accurate and stable. I see that up and to the right in the night sky [blocked by some trees], is the sun. There are black clouds covering the sky. The sun is shining a weird yellow light into the night sky. Sort of like an eclipse sun? I walk to the left on the deck to get a direct view of the sun. The trees are still sort of in the way. So I do a jump into the air and go up about 50 feet. The sun is amazing and multicolored. It is shining multicored light onto the houses in the area. Red, purple, blue bits of light, I gasp at the beauty.

Spoiler for frequent sexual content for the rest of this dream:

I land on the ground and am in a quiet suburban neighborhood of large houses at night. I remember a dream goal of sexually pleasing myself to see if I can climax in a dream without the challenge of waking from the sexual excitement from being with a female. I whip it out briefly, then I notice in the window of the house nearest me I see a man standing quickly jerking his big (ahem). His head is obscured by the top of the window. That must be the right house for me! I go and enter the house, and turn to the left. I see some females, definitely interested in them more than the guy, so I go to one and put her up on a chair and get a few quick BJ slurps from her. Then I'm positioning her for intercourse, and the problem arises that I have to use a female condom.

I'm looking at this strange device and trying to figure out how the heck to use it. It's about the size of a typical brown paper lunch sack, maybe a bit narrower. It is partly made from brown paper and partly from see-through cellophane-like plastic. I'm just looking at this thing and wondering what to do. Should I just put it inside her? Then her female friend comes in and is holding a more appropriately sized thing looking much like the "female condom" I'm inspecting.

My girl goes off to the bathroom to (put it in?). She returns and sits down a bit away from me, her face is now half-painted, like football fans do in stadiums. I look at her again and the color of the paint has changed and is harder to see. Then she is sitting right next to me again faced a bit away from me and I turn her head towards me and kiss her. She has thin lips and a small mouth and is wearing red lipstick. She tells me, "I know (your problem / your secret?)! You never went through puberty!" I deny this.

Then she is facing me and we're getting ready again for sex. I start unbuttoning her blouse, and I'm really looking forward to this. I tell her, "I can't wait to eat your p***y!" She says "Mmm Hmm!" and then at the second button,

the dream fades...

DEILD, LD#159

Spoiler for pretty much all sexual, explicit language and situations, some nasty bodily discharge, I'm warning you!:

I appear lying on my bed in my bedroom, there's a man sitting next to me. I get lucid right away. He is stroking a large erect (ahem). "I see you there, jerking it!" I tell him. I think he's some celebrity. I look at my own exposed member. There is some pus-y, cheese white stuff near the tip. WTF is that? Oh God I hope I didn't get VD from the girl I was just with in the other scene. I'm peeling back the skin and my whole thing basically is opened up kind of like a pod thing from Alien, it's really gross. The guy next to me says "ewww!" I pull out a string of disgusting discharge connected to some semen still coming out of the tip. I clearly need to go to the bathroom and wash my (ahem). I make a rude comment to the guy [censored].
I go to the hallway bathroom. I enter it, it is darkish but partially lit (by a night-light). I flip a light switch and nothing happens. ("Aha!" I think, so light switches *don't* work in my dreams!). I wash my thing. I then notice the man out in the hallway. I look again and he has a girl's body. I go out and he's a girl now. I tell the girl to "dry my (ahem) by sucking it". Which she does for a few seconds, and

the dream fades.

DEILD, LD#160:
I'm back in the hallway bathroom, sitting on the floor.

Spoiler for sexual encounter:

There is naked girl on her hands and knees across my body. Her coloring is a bit odd, maybe like a cartoon character. I position her so that her butt is facing me, still on her hands and knees. I have a close up view of her (ahem) right near my face. I get up on my knees and begin to enter her doggy style. Thinking of stabilization, I look around and put my hand on to the hallway stair railing which is right there. I begin to enter her

… and the dream fades.

[Wake, recall, BTS mantra breathing]

DILD, LD#161 Fish, task girl, restaurant
I appear about 10-15 feet up from a fairly large expanse of water. It is grey and slightly dim. I'm sitting with fogelbise. He says he's burned out of fishing. I look down to the water and am astounded. There are *so many* fish visible in the fairly shallow and clear water. Big round ones, straight ones, over to the right some large shark-sized fish. They are slowly swimming about. I exclaim "man the fishing would be *great* here!" I'm looking at these fish and something strikes me and I do a nose pinch and I'm lucid again. I go down to the water level. I think of the TOTM basic I, ask a DC for a TOTM task. I look up to where I was sitting before but fogelbise is gone. There's nobody around. I wade out into the water and see a girl with her head (eyes?) just above the water line. I go up to her and take both her hands in both of my hands and lift her up out of the water. I ask her, "tell me a task!" She doesn't answer. "Tell me a task!" I say again. She mumbles something. I take her in to a building, there is a waiter there with paper cups and I want him to pour me some champagne to drink. I take the girl against a wall and put her on a table and ask again, "tell me a task!". She answers, "invest your cash register, freeze." I repeat it slowly to make sure I have it. "Invest your cash register, freeze?" I again repeat, "Invest your cash register, freeze?" She nods yes. I lean down and

Spoiler for sexual encounter:

lick her p***y a few times but don't want to get engaged for fear of waking

.
I move on deeper into this building and encounter an older man, 50's perhaps, a bit overweight, wearing a white uniform, like a chef, and he's asking me for the remote control. We go into the next room and I"m looking around, forgetting him, and he again says he needs the remote control. We're near a chef's kitchen shelf (where they put up the finished plates) and I decide to reach around some appliance and expect to feel a small device with my fingers. I do feel such a device, but then an anonymous hand from the other side of the shelf shoves forward a small grey remote control. I pick it up and give it to the chef guy. I think of apologizing for it being missing, but I sense that I'm the boss of this place so that would look weak. I walk with this chef guy out towards the entrance, and want to have more fun, so I ask him to take me to the champagne, then...
… the dream fades.

wake, recall, BTS

Post-lucid:

+ appear in home, kitchen, a party's going on with guests over. fogelbise is sitting at the kitchen table in the dining nook, my wife is nearby in the kitchen. I want to indicate to him I had four lucid dreams just now, so I hold out my left hand with my thumb tucked in near his face slyly so no one else can see (I don't want to talk about the LDs where my wife could hear). fogelbise sort of shrugs not understanding and holds up about 8 fingers on two hands with a question on his face. I again indicate the four fingers to show I had 4 lucid dreams. There's a small boy (with an afro?) at the table also.

+ overlooking conference hall with military table different color, flags at each position , wife with me on upper level, computer, party, this is the place for action I say, she leaves angry, go get her?, go after she's still there by restaurant window, take sliced-in-half oranges from restaurant window, thers a cup there, we'll squeeze into a cup for fresh orange juice.

+ walk down street, big city, cross street, see son coming other way, want to cross to meet him, major gasoline lines being installed at this corner, overhead. Police block the crosswalk, I wait for green light and cross even through it may be blocked but nobody stops me.

Spoiler for sexual content, bodily fluids:

+ in home with sons, hear S1 talking about his (sexual?) encounter with his girlfriend, it involves a pineapple, and his girlfriend walking in on his masturbating then giving him a pineapple to indicate her desire? Son S2 is really making fun of son S1 for this. I'm in a bedroom off to the side masturbating with some device. It's making a lot of squishing sounds. I sit up and some really loud sounds result, I call out "It's from my slippers!" (it was true. There is a towel stuck in the upper part of the door. I close the door for more privacy. I lie on the bed and start in again on my (ahem), and notice that I am now ejaculating [pretty much first dream noticing this]. I'm confused because I felt no orgasm. It's really coming out of me, not just a minor early dribble. Hmm, seems I've had a premature ejaculation? My son in the other room says "oh don't worry, happens to me sometimes" and I *am* worried that this indicates he's inappropriately sexually active.

Lucid-dreaming again last night, but with 2 major differences. Firstly, only 2 days between events...secondly I drifted in and out of lucidity on at least 4 occasions. As per usual there are prices...it takes at least 5½-6 hours of sleep, then a WBTB (so I went to bed at 12.30 and finally got up at 09.30...I couldn't do that if I wasn't retired)

Also, the events don't seem particularly long (although my recall may just be limited) It's beginning to look like I need at least 1½ hours before I WBTB (rather than the hour I have been doing) Also, I'm not doing a massive amount of preparation...the usual “I'm dreaming...I'm lucid” etc exercises throughout the day for a few moments at a time.
But, as before, I had an extended session while I'm relaxed for meditation...I'll carry on doing that.

I didn't do any reality checks during the LD...I didn't need to. I'm walking through fields and everything suddenly firms-up and becomes so vivid and I'm thinking “Yay! I'm there again” (by now I just know when I'm lucid...the sensation is so different, the level of awareness is there and I'm thinking and planning) Then it drifts a bit (my recall suggests?) until the next scene which firms-up and again becomes lucid...and so on...

As per usual, my impatience kicks in and I decide to fly...but too hastily, as I feel as if the lower part of me is lagging behind...not good. I stop, then instruct myself to start again, but slowly and gently and that works. Clearly, the whole thing wasn't a solid consistently drawn-out experience because there's gaps in my memory and the coming-and-going of lucidity but I'll take what I can get thank you brain cells (forget Ed, these are now my little Minions and I love 'em)

I'm so thrilled I start to tell the wife...and I can see her tense-up. That hurts, because we've been married so long and she surely knows that I'm not given to flights of fancy...I'm just used to sharing things with her. I tackle her about it (gently) and ask her if she thinks I'm imagining all this and she's non-committal. (you think I'd have learned by now)

Finally she says “I don't believe in this sort of thing” which presumably either means “you are imagining this or “get thee behind me Satan!” It's easy to see that it was a foolhardy individual who mentioned lucid-dreaming in the middle ages...although generations before that had a much better deal because it was “just the shrooms talking and next time you're out can you get me some dear?”

All very interesting...where to go next? 1. Keep the exercises ticking over (maybe, if I can get a cluster of lucids, things will move to earlier hours of the night...I can but hope) 2. I've got my long-term plan to kick-start the brain. 3. Who cares? I'm loving it anyway.

A puzzle. I instruct my brain to wake me closer to dreams ending and often feel a bit ill. Yet I can feel lucid dreams ending from inside a dream (how much closer can you get to dream-endings?!) and feel no ill-effects whatsoever...

Strangely, there are trade-offs. I can have a few days of 2 or 3 dream-recalls a night, but no lucids, then a cluster of days with a couple of LD's, but with no recall of other dreams...as if there are only so many Minions on the job and something has to give. Also, my developed ability to recall a dream I had a few minutes ago (and I've moved around a bit...even sat up sometimes)...results in the discovery that recalling celeb's names, if I'm watching quizzes like Pointless, requires me to wait patiently for half a minute, until my brain generally spits out the answer...send me more Minions!

Woke up at night, wrote down some dreams, decided to try to WILD, laid on my back and relaxed my body. after some time noticed i am to awake for a dive so i switched to do some SSILD cycles. changed my position to the side and imagined to climb up some stairs up and down and up and so on.

Dream started: still in my bed and try to fall asleep. its 10:40 am and i feel awake and should start my day. have a little bad mood because i wanted to LD this night and it didnt work... someone enters the room and i talk to him about it.
a lot of vivid NLD scenes...
then i enter a room. a lot of people are around. i throw something behind my back over my shoulder into my other hand. [i practiced this some month ago in waking, then did it shortly in one lucid and dreamed about in maybe two other NLD´s] i notice "hey you did this in your dreams.... wait this is a dream" Nosepinch to confirm it. i instantly remember all my tasks for this lucid. i want to do basic II advanced I and bonus. how convenient that i am in a room with some people. i turn to the next guy and start pointing with my finger on him and laugh like crazy. while i do this i look at him and get a short doubt if i should have picked someone else because he looks like someone who dont like to be laughed at and punch you in the face for that. i ignore this thought and laugh even harder. he gets a little angry and tries to slap away my hand but i react too fast and pull it back before he hits me. he seems offended and goes away. i am in really good mood so i pick a chair and say "people hey some attention please" step on the chair and do a frontflip down on the ground. i (too) strongly feel the rotation and think that i had luck it didnt destabilized my dream or did it stabilize it...? some people are laughing some start to talk again. "Hey psht PSHT do you hear this? i think my phone is ringing" i dont feel or hear anything but i look around and suddenly see atleast 3 phones that lie around or are held by people whose display turn on like they where ringing. i just expect that my phone in my pocket will ring to. i put my hand in my pocket, search a little and get it out. its not ringing or vibrating but i see the display is on and in a mix of English and German there is written incoming call. my display looks strange so i have some trouble to take the call. the symbol disappears. [i remember Sensei´s thread which says: dont focus to much on hitting some buttons when you want to write a text but concentrate on the text and let your "fingers" do it on their own.] with this in mind i just put the damn phone to my ear and expect that i picked the call and talk to someone. at the beginning its an automatic machine-voice but after some seconds i hear a guy talking. i seem to talk to "Stratos" a troubleshoot hotline for phone and internet? (maybe because i had some trouble with the phone some seconds earlier?^^) He asks me to start to tell him who i really am. I tell him "Your mama can tell you some authentic data" and i hang up . i go out on the terrace and look around. my vision blurs a little and i dont remember why. maybe i put of my glasses or something? i dont care and continue i try to move a flowerpot with TK and it wont work. i get a little confused if i might not be dream? i do another nosepinch and breath long and deeply in and out. my awareness raises again and i see through the window the guys. i see some flowers and approach them. they are not that big but have really really bright colors. i smell them and some are smelling and some are not. when i look from up close they look exotic. i i really enjoy to take my time to look at them in detail. it feels good. i remember that i want to blow up the earth. i didnt decided yet if i want to fly into the outer space or try to teleport there. i think about lying down and "fall asleep" for teleportation. i look for the right place (damnit that i always need to find "the perfect spot" for everything...) i go down some stairs and see a couple entangled in eachother. i move my hands in a gesture to split them apart. they hold on to each other but one can see that a force is pulling on them. i think about to pick the guy up and throw him out of the picture but i decide i dont want to be mean and let them be together so i stop. i look down the path i am going and see that it is a long winding path. i ask them if its crowded there at the end and she tells me it depends... i start flying and fly with high speed down the winded path. i am so fast i miss the mark. i stop and paddle back a little. the path changed into some red and blue waterslide. i find it cool and fly with high speed back to the middle of it and sit inside. i start slideing but for some reason i start thinking about my waking body and have a FA where i write down my dream. i see on the paper that i already wrote down that i woke up at 10:40. i look at the watch and change the time to something around 7/8 and start writing. i rip out some paper to write on and notice that i rip out more then i wanted to. i wake up for good and see that i didnt write anything down, neither any time or the dream. so i remembered my FA in my FA xD

Dream - Driving about (woke up at 3:00am)
I'm in my parents house, I think I somehow made the alarm go off and it's wailing loudly... I punch in the code to turn it off but nothing happens. Argh, I must have put the wrong code in. Everyone is waiting outside. Why is the alarm going off anyways?
I remember there being a Tuatara at some point...
Later on I'm in the car with my mom, she's driving and we turn into a house to pick some people up. The house looks simultaneously like my neighbours and our house combined. We're waiting for my dad and some other person to hurry up, they should already be ready by now. They must have forgotten we were heading out, there's no lights on in the house at all. It's already 9pm.. Geeze :/. We beep the horn loudly and my mum is impatient now, she's driving in circles in the driveway of the property. I look up at the window of my dads room (it's not his room anymore) and see that the light suddenly turns on. Finally, I think to myself that they now know we're here at least. I tell my mum that they've noticed us. We start talking and discuss her going back to university. She wants to study some ecology papers as she's found that she's interested in that field of study. I tell her that I can help her review her essays if she needs me to.

Dream experience: 5 (pretty vivid and the dream felt long. I remembered it pretty clearly and I didn't wake up feeling foggy, which usually leads to me forgetting my dreams).
Dream awareness: 1 (not enough to be aware that I was dreaming, but there was some definite conscious thinking involved)

I think my cat woke me up from this dream... She jumped on top of my face.
After I woke up I decided to get up for a while, so I spent 40 minutes researching random stuff and then reading a comic before heading back to sleep.

I also remember a really strange WILD last night where I seemed to naturally just slip into a dream consciously. But the whole thing felt delirious and uncontrollable, I had visuals at first but they disappeared. The interesting thing was that I was more involved with other sensations like touch and sound (the sound was more like a humming noise).

I’m in the ICU helping out. D is there with a patient and I put an IV in her. I get it the first time and I’m impressed. I talk to D about her care. She’s pretty stable. As I start the IV I make sure I have control of the flow. I tell her it might hurt at first when the fluid goes in. She cringes in pain but it passes. I explain to her that she’s getting regular fluid because she’s dehydrated, not any medication. She had no idea and she’s very thankful I’m being open with her. She tells me she is so impressed with me and the way I handled the doctor (She doesn’t know D is my husband and not a doctor). There’s a fire alarm and we have to evacuate. I notice I never locked her bed and it moves as she does. I lock it and then promptly unlock it to leave. I’m the only one in the elevator and have to ask a Filipino maintenance worker which floor I”m supposed to go to. I had pressed level 1 but he told me level 2. I forget to change it on the elevator and we end up going all the way to 1. I press 2 and we have to wait. It made for a very long elevator ride. I guess it’s just like a big city hospitals, I thought. The patient started slumping over in her bed and looking pale. I asked if she was ok and she responded sluggishly. I raised the head of her bed. This happened a couple of times. I took her to the cafeteria to get her something to eat. The patient is sitting in the middle of a booth. I ask the patient if she wants saltine cracker or graham cracker. She tells me graham cracker so I go to find some. I realize I’m suddenly pushing her in a wheel chair and realize I’m dreaming. I leave her in the hallway and go into a hotel room where a hot and horny porn guy is laying in bed. I jump in the bed and say, “Guess what? This is a dream!” He kinda chuckles. “I’ll prove it to you!” I pick up a pack of peppermint candies from the bed and tell him to guess what’s in the package. He doesn’t but I imagine they’re miniature spearmint gums. I open it and they are! I laugh. He starts making out with me and after a few seconds I get up because I don’t want to lose lucidity to a sex dream. I go over to the window and think about things I’ve wanted to do while lucid. Flying! I could just jump out of this window! He walks up behind me and wraps his arms around my waist. I look down and realize we’re very, very high up. I start getting nervous. What if I”m not dreaming and I just jump out of the window and fall to my death? “This is a dream, right?” I look back at him and ask. He just chuckles...he's proving very unhelpful and dull. I try pinching my nose (which never works for me) and am confused by the ambiguous results. That must mean I'm dreaming. He finally suggests to start out small. Great idea! Suddenly I’m on the road and think of getting onto some awnings on the city street to jump off of. He doesn’t think that’s a great idea. Then I had another idea! I took a few steps to my right and found myself in the center of major high speed traffic. I started jumping and flying over cars as they passed. I saw a lot of Idaho license plates, but it makes sense because this is Vegas. After doing that a few times I start flying without stopping by using a swimming motion. My calve starts burning and I figure it is cramping in real life, so I try to relax and keep going. I look behind me and my lover has gotten on some kind of silver flying machine and flies away. I go into a more secluded area that is really green with lots of trees. Suddenly I’m walking down a stone path thinking about my step-dad’s family road tripping around the U.S. I think it’s because I assumed I was now in the midwest. I come across these large stone baths aligned in a courtyard. I get into one. I’m trying to think of what I want to do. I thought about practicing summoning someone from nothing. I stood up and faced a wall. “When I turn around there will be…” I can’t think of anything I want to summon. I decide to try and bring that guy back but I have no idea who he was. I thought I recognized him but I can’t think of why. So I decided to keep it vague and summoned a similar hot guy. I turned around and nobody was there. I decided to start making out with the imaginary guy to see if he would appear. He didn’t and I was just making out with the stone. I leave and find something else to do. I go out into the courtyard and see a calf with bright patterns. It looked like he was wearing a sweater but he wasn’t. How cute. Then I decide to find a door so that I could open the door and find myself somewhere new. In my search for a door I wander onto someone’s New Zealand property and start getting followed by an older lady. She is highly annoyed with my shenanigans. I find a beautiful clear stream that has bright purple and green patches of moss in the middle and on the sides. I jump from patch to patch and they are so soft and bouncy. “How beautiful!” I exclaim with a big smile on my face. I think about making small talk but don’t want to push her. Somehow I find myself watching a screen of different movie choices. They were old Disney ones with Hillary Duff. One started playing and was comprised of two women having sex with a man. One of them was an actress I recognized. They were contorted and the point of view kept changing so it was a bit confusing. But I could almost feel one of the woman’s impending orgasms. Then she climaxed and everything stopped. They started congratulating her and telling her she did a good job and I accidentally entered the movie. She had given birth and the baby shot into another room. I found the body of what was supposed to be a baby except it only had a torso and one arm. It also had a tattoo. It was six months overdue. It was odd so I continued to my mission. The room I was in looked like my grandma’s living room and I was holding a type of flexible, pink/orange conch shell that kinda looked like a vagina. I put something in the center and rubbed to try and change it’s shape but it didn’t work. I closed the sliding wood door and held the shell in my hands like it was magical. That gave me the idea to imagine myself on the set of Once Upon a Time. I didn’t visualize anything particular, just the idea. So when I opened the doors it was just my living room with a few women on the couch. “Oh well.” I said. They looked at me with wide eyes, confused. I stared back, threw my arms in the air and jumped up while shouting, “woohoo!” at my lucid victories. I smiled big and ran into my room, where I woke up.


What a great way to start a new month! I learned that I have to be very specific with my requests and intentions to make things happen in my lucid dreams.

01.12.2015

Changing COD Username Never Felt So Hard (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I’m trying to change my username in a Call of Duty-esque related game, but as I’m doing this, I hear the bantering from two females that seem to have intentions of me not changing my username. I eventually do it, but it was just too annoying.

Then, when I tried to get on a server, I think I had to step into a portal to get into a game, but when I did so, and went around it, someone immediately killed me. It was an Asian male, and he was wearing a gray shirt with dark jeans. He had long hair that stretched all the way to his neck, and was probably in his early 30s.

I was irritated, and left the game.

_________________________

01.12.2015

Trying to Save Someone through Non-Sequential Tasks (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I’m trying to save someone, but I don’t know who in particular, and some sprite-animated anime girl with white hair, faded violet long trench coat, red shirt, and white tank top informs me that if I followed her instructions very clearly, I could save them.

It starts out, or my recall of it starts out with her instructing me, as if she’s talking to me via mind voice, of having to save certain images in certain formats that don’t really resonate to their respective formats. The one that I remembered the most out of the rest was her telling me to save a picture of Tsunade from the Naruto Shippuden series smiling in an .android format.

I was easily able to find an image, but it was most of her face being cut off, and it was in black and white.

I tried saving it the easy way of erasing the extension of the picture/gif, but wasn’t able to, for some reason. So, there’s this program that comes out of nowhere, the software-converter-ex-machina, which comes with all the formats I needed. I navigated through the software for a little bit, and it has some bland color of a dirtied-up vanilla, and the arrows to scroll down had this old Windows style to it.

I eventually saved it as an .android, and the moment I did this, some black rectangle with green words were portrayed transiently. The girl professed to me that the next thing I had to do was play same sprite-based, adventure game on the same computer/laptop I’m on. She gives me a vague concept of the plot of the game, or at least the deterrent set up that would make it somewhat tedious.

There were these female entities where if your character had their back facing them, they would subsequently slash behind your back, and it would be quite graphic a full of gore. I tried the first time to see if that would actually be the case, which it did. When I started navigating through the game, things became blurry for a bit, and I received some kind of message of ways I can figure out where I can find the person I’m trying to save. Within the message, I had two attachments of .xls documents, or Excel related documents. If I could figure out how to assess the instructions, the same black rectangle would show up on-screen with some green text, and a green checkmark with a rotating circle behind it confirming I solved it.

I believe the Tsunade picture was part of the objective, now that I think about it. I’m on my way to figure out the second .xls document, but I can’t recall what happens next.

I was looking forward and realized that I was now seeing stars rather than blackness. They looked a bit blurry, though, so I focused on them some more to make them vivid. I concentrated on transporting myself past a star in order to fly into outer space. I started off slow, but quickly picked up speed. In a few seconds, the stars flew by me at a great speed. I stopped myself and concentrated on transforming into a dolphin. I could hardly move, though. I put my legs out in front of me thinking it might be easier which it was. My legs melded together and I had a nice dolphin tail. I was able to put my tail behind me and enjoy the feel of it. I tried to get used to it more so it's easier to get in the future.

My attention switched to the basic TOTM. I looked around and saw there was a few dcs. I picked an overweight, middle aged, man with square, thick framed glasses.

"What would be a good task of the month?" I asked.
"That's too much information", he said.
"What would be something that would be fun to do in a dream? You know what a dream is, right?" I said. The dc just the gist of the question and thought about it.
"Write something down with a pencil and think about it." he said.
"Write something down with a pencil in a dream and think about it?"
"Yeah"
"That's a good idea!" I said sarcastically. I woke up.

It's currently a gloomy, windy, rainy start to Winter here and it's clear by now that the season affects me...I don't get SAD I just don't go out much, I don't get that all-important sun...that needs to change. Not many remembered dreams at the moment but I'm persevering with mantras and attempts to up my awareness...less impatience, steady forward-plod....I'm in that blessed state where I know I CAN do it I just need to find better ways.

So, after a total of 8 hours sleep and a WBTB I achieved a short lucid this morning. I think it was borderline because it was dark and there was no vividness but that blessed realization “this is a dream” popped up. I seemed to be in a seaside town, with 2 companions and we could see the lights of the town centre in the distance as we moved towards it.

Yesterday afternoon, as I sat down to meditate, I started by doing fairly deep conditioning re my main dream signs (not just reciting mantras, instead really picturing scenarios that contained the signs, as I mentally said things like “I'm dreaming...I'm lucid...I remember my dreams” (well buck up on that last one lately) and it may have made the difference.

In the lucid I'm pleased that I immediately went through reality checks...but forgetting to check my hands (which I love doing...that and pressing walls, which I did do) but already I could feel it slipping and I started to spin and it stabilized. I had pre-determined to look around and check everything but it was dark (a sign I think that I was always right on the edge of lucidity) Then it slipped again and I woke.

I need the brain boost that I think my new mate Psi could provide. The time is right, the conditions are right and I just need to find where he hangs out and that's the hard part. I thought I'd found him recently but, apparently, it was just someone who looked like him...gotta be careful, he has some really nasty companions...can't risk getting on their wrong side. I really need a change of local scenery...lots of fields with grazing cattle etc...places to walk and think things over and search...

Still ticking...

I realized I was dreaming while seeing my dad's ex wife alive which she is now passed away. Me and my brother walked outside of the building and I decided I wanted to fly on a broom Harry Potter style. Me and my brother collected some rooms from someone's porch. Then we took off flying over an apartment complex, I felt I had really good control by using the broom to navigate my flight. I soon woke up after flying for a little bit.