non-lucid

So I went to bed a few hours ago and decided to try a little bit of the MILD technique before I went to sleep. Basically I repeated "The next time I dream, I will perform a reality check, and realize I'm dreaming."

So I dreamed that I was in some sort of giant maze with a bunch of random people who were randomly transported there. We were all running like mad back and forth. The maze wasn't one level. It was multi level. There was the main level which was gigantic, like a closed of basketball court, and covered in a padded like substance. At one end of this padded level, about a hundred feet in the air, was this tower looking area with a slit for a door.

Anyways. Suddenly we're all running around like a race had just started. I notice that, as we're running around, some people are wearing all white and some people are wearing red and white clothing. Sort of like the Assassins Creed outfit. At some point in the dream I realize I'm supposed to chase down and try and save the people that are wearing both red and white and to try and be with them because the groups of straight white are chasing us down and capturing us and doing, I'm not sure what. But every time anyone gets caught they start screaming, terrified. I remember thinking: "What kind of God or gods would make us follow one thing and then make us suffer for it?"

At this point I almost become just a pair of eyes with no arms/legs and simply watch as things unfold. I remember this one man running up to a high level and seeing three different options to continue running. It's dark up here and he sees a flash of red and white so he knows to run that way but then he sees flashes of JUST white and knows that he's been cornered. In "my" head or the narrators head I remember narrating his final actions: 'And knowing full well it would be his last desperate moments the man sprinted head on towards what he believed.' And sure enough: my narration was right. He get's tackled and I'm whisked away somewhere else.

I think I'm "me" now in the dream. I'm running up and down more of these padded stairs. I see this woman running screaming and across some sort of opening I see a man wearing white and red face paint, very vividly. I feel like I should follow that person. He feels important. So I start chasing after him and I'm running up stairs to keep up and another guy is with me running, he's on my team. We reach a point where the stairs don't go any further so we turn to run back but take a different way. I yell, "This way is no good!" and sure enough, it isn't. We near a part where it looks like the stairs are OK but in fact, at a different angle, they are all broken except for one. We turn back and run again.

And then I must roll in my sleep or something because suddenly I'm at the bottom again and there are a bunch of boxes, about 8 feet tall, that look like giant pillows set all over the bottom floor. The lights are bright and I feel like a ton of people are there again. At the middle of the room is a guy that looks like Drew Brees, a football player, and he is being interviewed by some guy with a mic. He says: "I'm not going to do anything crazy. If I could: I'd like to hit in an NL ballpark." Or something to that affect. He's talking about some sort of baseball competition he's going to have, with just himself, to show off. I then woke up and my heart was racing and my first thought is: It's kinda funny I had two dream fragments but both of them deal with "teams". Hm... back to bed. It's still only 3:22. Will edit with more dreams.

For some reason I start dreaming and I'm running the "fast break" in basketball and I do a behind the back pass to another kid with curly hair and freckles. He doesn't seen the layup coming and it goes outta bounds. I run over to him after the play ends (and suddenly we're in a cafeteria) and introduce myself. I tell him that I didn't know his name or else I woulda warned him about the pass so he coulda got it. And then suddenly my dream warps into this next one. I'm not going to post much about this fragment as it was super jagged and weird: I was Bart Simpson, or a look a like, and I was running around all over this school wreaking havoc. I would make things blow up or hide things or make mean people get in trouble. And I was constantly getting chased again. My " final moment" in this dream was when I decided to do a suicide mission. I made something blow up and then I tried running away But the explosion caught me as I was running and launched me backwards. And suddenly that dream bled into the next one.

So I dreamed that I was in some sort of sitcom where I would stage situations to make me look like a hero in order to pick up chicks. I pretended to save Emily Mortimers daughters life (she seemed to live in the same apartment complex as me) and later that I day I made myself "happen" to walk by and she invited me in to chat. She had just broken up with her boyfriend/husband (played by a guy I know, Matthew D) and everything was really tense. But anyways we get to making small talk, which I can't remember, and it seems like she's liking me when suddenly her brother (or a close friend of Matthews) comes over and sits down on the couch while she's in the kitchen. I can tell he's pissed I'm there but I act polite and say "Hey, what's up." He says not too much and is mostly polite back. I don't remember what happens next but suddenly he snaps at me. I get mad at him and almost drop an "f bomb" which he starts to grin and say: "Oh yeah? An f bomb? That's not her style at all." And I get even more angry but I hold it in and mutter that he's the kinda guy that sits at the top of the movie theatre so he can look down on everyone. He goes "So I'm some kinda class racist eh?" and starts laughing at me. Emily walks back into the room and says: "I don't need this!" and then next thing I know the brother/Matthews friend is kicked out. And then suddenly we're in a different POV, almost like a sitcom opening, where I'm following three similar looking brothers. One brother is played by the guy from Cloverfield, the main character, and then two guys that look kinda like him. And they're walking up some sorta steps to the top of the apartment building. It's sunny and it looks kinda like California. As they walk up the steps some music is playing and scenes of guys telling girls to "go to roof 7" occurs. Apparently, in this dream sitcom, when you don't want to get with a girl you tell her to go wait at roof 7. And then one of these guys shows up and "sweeps her off her feet" for a one night stand. Anyways. These three guys make it to the top of the apartment building "rooftop 7" and look around. It's all concrete with a few potted trees and benches. There are two groups of people: all guys. The brothers seem super dissappointed and then one brother mentions Emily living in the apartment and how he's going to try and get with her. At this point I realize that I am the main character (the guy from Cloverfield) and for some reason I don't say anything back. My "brother" says "it's gonna be awesome. Gettin' the second girl this week that you been with, haha" implying that they'll enjoy being with him more. And that's pretty much it for that dream. I DO remember that the one brother had one giant tooth instead of regular sized front teeth. Teeth getting messed up seems to be a theme in my dreams.

And my fifth dream in one night: I remember standing around in a parking lot with a buddy of mine, Austin. He had come driving up from somewhere. And anyways in the back of his van was a bunch of music equipment. So he comes flying across the street to where I'm hanging out at and pulls around and parks and pops his trunk. I'm super worried he forgot something we'll need but I keep finding out that he has everything. I remember, from across the street, watching him running holding my amp head with one hand and the thing dangling around like it was going to fall. It was sorta funny. So we start jamming out and I keep all of the equipment underneath the door of his trunk because I'm afraid of rain. And then we invite my friend Chris to come play with us and he shows up, too, from across the street. From there forward it gets pretty hazy. He mentions how his class gave him the day off or something but he's thinking of going back anyways. Somebody makes a joke where the punchline is "I wouldn't even show you my penis online." And that's pretty much it.

So, wow. The MILD technique really does work. No Lucids but 5 completely separate and memorable dreams. I'm going to keep this up.

31.07.2010

Difficulties at the gas station. (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

One of my lowest nights. I had some finger pain this night and that prevented a long rested night. Two dreams.

Second:

I was in a gas station. It was day and I wanted to fill up my car. The gas station was huge but it only had two pumps. I would see the pumps but when I tried to drive by them, I would miss them. I remembering seeing the pumps from several feet and trying to drive to them without success.

I finally was able to pump my gas and a DC appeared. He tried to sell me something I cannot recall. I could see like some images of the past of my dad (the jerk one)

I jumped in my car, turned the engine on and started to move. I realized I was still pumping gas. When I noticed, the pump just finished. I closed up the pump and left to somewhere.

Missed Dream Signs:
- Not being able to get to the pump.

What I would have done if lucid:
- Head for a ToTM.

I fall asleep in a video game. I wake up at a computer. The computer somehow looks like it evolved from an insect, as did everything... I was a kind of bee-man. I walked out of the room. Other bee people greeted me. There were glowing yellow circles in the floor, and other circles glowing... red.. green... I flew through the wall, and saw a room of all red.. and... a room of all green...

The colors were gorgeous, yet, simple.. I suddenly felt claustrophobic. I flew through the crust to the surface of the planet, through an ocean filled with life, and flew into the sky.

Raven was flying by on a swan. She looked like an Egyptian Heiroglyph. I felt like my brain was melting.

The whole dream melted and melted. I felt like I was going insane. That's when I remember I smoked salvia.

WTF. WHERE AM I. BACK IN THE BIODOME? weird man weird

Everybody in my family became Infected with this strange virus, so I took it upon myself to end their misery. It was hard, and it was before they turned completely, but I managed. Somehow I was not infected, so I moved on with my dog - to a place where other survivors were gathering. I was hoping that maybe I could stay safe with them. And for a while, we were. We gathered supplies and moved into this large asphalt/brick house that was both sturdy and spacious, and isolated. A heavy-plated truck was our escape vehicle in the garage, and we took it upon ourselves to memorize every nook and cranny of the house in case something happened.

Axel (my dog) took well to living there. He never strayed far from me, so protective he was, but he'd play in the sunlight and happily go to and fro with the smaller children and play with them.

But like all good things, it had to end.

Hunters broke in, and my dog attacked them. He was Infected, then, but before I could go to him, I was ushered inside o the house and we were scrambling to get safe. My dog was taken inside, and I remember he was taken behind a door I was not allowed to enter. When we were attacked again, the next night, everything had been packed up into the getaway truck and as I was about to enter, I saw my dog, bound and insane. I bit my lip as I entered the truck, and away we went. The Hunters had attacked in the sunset, so we used it to our advantage.

We drove for what seemed like forever, but finally got to another safe haven - in Colorado. It was an incredibly fortified visitor's center of sorts, and it acted of somewhat like a store. We grew and sold food and other important things to people who travelled there in search of us. It was there that we discovered the alien life form that had come down and polluted the people, mutating them into Hunters.

But we had a small creature - another alien - and it raised the alien flora that had taken root in the visitor center. Everything was beautiful, captured into tubes and perfectly temperature-controlled. I took the small creature into my hand and had it give me a small tour. Against my will, however, I began to cry. The kind of deep heaves that leaves you feeling exhausted and tired. It was because I had killed everything I had ever loved.

Over time, we effectively found out how to stop the Hunters. We would lure them into the building and test possible ways to kill them. And we eventually found the correct way to do it.

Again, it was compromised.

I remember everyone was running back and forth and was screaming. A woman I was fond of ran back inside to save something, back inside of the building filled with Hunters, and I knew she would die. Her husand and I waited outside, in the heavy duty truck. A girl who was with us tried to plead with him to leave her, because if he cared about survival he would. He was going to wait for his "fool wife" he told her.

I was spurred into action, ran back inside of the building and began to search for her. I ran straight into a Hunter, which turned around and looked at me with eyes that only reeked of murderous intents.

"Don't," I pleaded, "Don't hurt her. Just turn around and leave, there are plenty of other things for you to eat besides her and me."

To my surprise, it did. It turned around and walked off calmly.

Something else was beginning to happen, but I was so scared and shaken that I pulled myself out of the dream.

The dream starts out with me riding my bike along a suburban neighborhood road. It curves to the left constantly, and judging by the surroundings, the curve of the road, and my distance from home, I'm riding my bike home from the neighborhood park. The sky is orange and purple, so I assume the sun is setting. Something catches my eye and I look up.

Floating a ways in the distance above the sky is an alien spaceship, slowly heading towards my house. My heart starts to race and I bike as fast as I can, trying to beat it home. Somehow I manage to get home before it, but not before crossing its path. I'm positive the aliens can see me entering my house.

I lock all the doors and try to find a place to hide. For some reason the most logical place is in front of my couch, which is in front of a giant window. I duck down and cower. After a few seconds I get my courage up to look out my window. My heart skips a beat. The spaceship is landing in the street right in front of my house. I watch as the main door hisses and slowly lowers itself open. At this point I get up and sprint into my room, slam the door shut, and hide under my bed. I can feel my heart pounding a million miles an hour.

Somehow the aliens managed to get inside. I can hear footsteps walking down the hall towards my room, and my doorknob turning. Then I wake up.

For some reason when I remember this dream, I also remember a fragment of me being a ghost. People can see me and are chasing me, so I fly away and hide in decorative oil pots. But they always break them open and try to catch me. I don't know how they know where I'm hiding...

I had this dream a while back, like when Steve Irwin was still alive.
So me and my friend Brittany were going on a roadtrip to Wisconsin Dells. They have this waterpark there called the Kalahari, which is for like little kids but that's not the point. So we checked into the Kalahari, and when we opened the door to our room, it opened into the real live African Kalahari. So we ventured inside, and looked around. We started to walk to nowhere in particular. Along the way we saw lots of different animals like girrafes and snakes, except they were made from paper like origami animals. I went to touch them, but when i did they died. However, their angel spirit floating up to heaven was a real animal. So they were fake when they were living but real when they were dead? Anyways, I cried when they died. In the background Britt was turning into a tree.

All of a sudden we hear a rustling coming from a bush. (Britt is no longer a tree.) We look over at it, and suddenly this crazy guy wearing a comical wolf mask with a huge nose jumps out screaming, "RAAAHRBOOGABOOGABOOGA!!!" We look at him like, what the fuck is wrong with you? He whips off his mask. "AHA!" he says in an Australian accent. Apparently Steve Irwin has found his way into the dream. "I bet I fooled you lassies didn't I? Ha, no, you two youngsters are smart enough to know that the REAL African Wolfhound has a much LARGER snout!" he says as he makes a circular motion around the mask's nose. Britt and I look at eachother like, whats with this clown? Suddenly he's right in our faces, smiling as wide as possible. "Say, how would you two like to join me on a wild Native American horse hunt?" without our consent he throws us each on a spotted white and brown horse, then jumps on his own, and we ride of into the sunset with Steve laughing maniacally.

I went out onto my street and heard a very loud snoring. It was a large bear under a car and apparently he was disturbing the neighbors. So I decided to throw a rock at it to get it to leave. It woke up and started to chase me.

I ran furiously to the apartments across the street and I jumped over a concrete wall into a pool area (Which is not there in real life BTW). Thinking bears cannot swim, I leap into the pool... Turns out they can...



It starts swimming towards me, throwing punches and trying to drown me. (This bear was acting like a human and I was genuinely frightened... Don't fuck with bears...)

This is the point where I skip in time...

I find myself on an endless highway at night, still in a panic from the bear attack, I see a saloon style bar on the side... I go inside and hide in the bathroom stall, I crouch down on top of the toilet and hope...

The bear walks in and searches around, he punches the mirror and then sees me peek over the stall door.

He busts in and starts beating me up furiously, I struggle my way out of the bathroom and into the main bar area, as he enters the bar area I am flailing my arms and roaring to try and deter it. It punches me across the room and while all the people watch I am furiously fighting with the bear. I summon up enough strength to punch it in the gut and then I get something to beat it in the back of the head with.. It starts to get weaker and weaker then it's head falls to the table... It somehow obtains the object and beats my head...

I don't remember much more but I'm pretty sure I won eventually

Key:
Non-Lucid, Lucid, Commentary/Notes, Hypnagogic Hallucinations
i Inner Awareness, a Action, f Form, c Context

Bloodbath Fragment

I was in a dingy bathroom. The walls were brown and the floor was tiled dark red. Everything was dirty and the lights were really dim. There was someone in a bath with attached shower. He was bleeding.

He was then on the floor, blood gushing from his head all over the place ( c ). There were several shades of blood ( f ). Someone else was there and remarked that people had multiple levels of blood in their bodies. The lighter and more saturated the colour of the the blood the less important and the darker and less saturated the more important ( c ). The blood gushing out of the man's head was getting darker and less saturated ( f ). The person commented again that if he lost any more he would die.

Ex-Con?

I was sitting at a table in an unfamiliar room ( c ). It was some kind of apartment with white walls. Also in the room were some other people, but I didn't recognise anyone except two old school friends, L and S ( c ). I was writing and there appeared to be some kind of lesson or lecture going on ( c ).

The next think I knew everyone is leaving. I walked out and found myself on a street walking in to a supermarket.

I found myself at the check out with several items. There was a man with me that I don't recognise ( c ). His eyes were very blue and he had dark brown hair. He was slightly taller than me and wearing a white top.

I was placing my items on the checkout. I remember there being some kind of unfamiliar green fruit or vegetable ( f ). Another man who was wearing a dark jacket picked up two of my items and stuffed them inside his jacket. I gestured to protest, but he gestured that I shouldn't, so I didn't ( a ).

I was rushing to pack the carrier bag, but the check out assistant was super fast ( a ). She quickly handed me a receipt and asked for £1.50. I could read the value clearly on the receipt. I took some change out of my pocket, but dropped it all over the check out ( a ). I scrambled around looking for the money. I picked up a £1 coin, two 20p coins and searched for a 10p coin, but couldn't find one so gave her two 5p coins. I felt very flustered.

I was then leaving the supermarket with the blue eyed man. We walked back towards the apartment and saw L and S going in the other direction. I waved and L waved back, but S just looked typically miserable. While walking back I got the sense we were in a foreign country, probably somewhere in Europe ( c ).

We reached the apartment. It had an external staircase so we ascended. Stopping at the door I remarked to the blue eyed man that I was a murderer! ( i,c ) He was shocked and just stood there. I invited him in and said that we should have a drink ( a ). I walked in to the apartment, not noticing the clear signs of a disturbance throughout.

I found a bottle of some kind of alcohol on the floor. It was open but full. Somehow it was lying on its side but the liquid did not flow out ( f ). I shouted to the man that we should have a drink ( a ). Only then did I start to become aware of the state of the place. Things were broken and knocked over. There was a dart in a red sofa that looked like it had been thrown from the doorway ( c ).

The man was still standing at the door, shocked that I had randomly just told him that I was a murderer. I realised that something bad had happened while I wasn't here, but somehow knew that I would get the blame for it! ( i )

Some police walked in. One of them was a black detective guy. He was accusing me of something and I was being arrested ( c ).

Suddenly I felt that I wasn't a man any more but a blonde woman ( i,f ). I had a flashback to some kind of prison where I was sitting at a table wearing an orange jumpsuit ( i ). Another woman was being lead through a door by some guards. She looked at me. She had long dark hair and was extremely beautiful. I felt as though we were friends. I knew she was being released and that I would be soon ( i ).

Back in the apartment I felt as though she had been there recently with me and I also felt as though I had betrayed her somehow ( i ).

Still can't LD to save my life. Really frustrating. On the upside, I am recalling better so I guess that's something. Maybe a few more nights of good recall can help me achieve LD.

Anyway, the first dream is a little fuzzy. We are at Ceder Point, or "my version" (one of many) of it, with my aunt Delores (whom I am estranged from) and her three boys who are in their twenties now, but for the dream, still children. I wanted to ride a roller coaster, the Raptor, but couldn't find it. They all were eager to ride this pirate ride, which I shied away from because it didn't seem safe to me.

They get on, and the operator loses control of the "rope" he pulls to make the machine sway (why he's using a thick "rope", I have no idea). He tells me to help him hold it so the people won't get hurt. I don't know what to do and start panicking. There is no way I can keep that stupid ship from crashing. I never see the end of this dream...

Second dream is about Star Trek...two girls are fighting in an arena. They are held in these black anti-gravity straps (hovering there while they beat the crap out of each other). They have powers akin to androids. Laser beams and super strength, reflexes. As soon as the fight starts, one of the girls loses her powers and gets clobbered by the other. There were other details, but nothing concrete to describe. I do remember seeing stars outside the window...but that's it.

Third dream was me at my parent's house going to sleep on the couch. I had colored pencils and ended up clinking them a little as I settled down. My mother comes out and bitches that I'm making too much noise. An argument (no surprise there since I have spoke to her since last December) ensues, and my dad comes out to back my mother up. Again no surprise there as he always does that no matter what her problem is. They say I need to move out, and the rest of the dream is spent trying to call people to pick me up, and trying to find another place to live. I do recall my best friend popping in the kitchen at one point to give me advice where to go.

Fourth dream took place in twenty minutes and was my best chance to WILD. Alas, no go. But it was really vivid. There was boy with a strange creature following him. It would take over people to catch him. I was watching all this, and it became aware of me watching. The boy, somehow, was tricked into entering this apartment with two older men. One wanted to hurt him, the other wanted to ransom him for money or something. I ran out and tip a detective who, instead of arresting the men, calls them on the phone. Either way, it provided a distraction for me to grab the boy's hand and get him out of there.

We enter a door, and inside the room there is another door. It's blue. A dark-haired woman opens it, and I know her sister peeking over her shoulder is infected with this thing that wants the child. Apparently, stupid me went into a connecting apartment. Oops.

I'm in a car now, and two women are in the backseat (have no idea where the boy went) who ask the driver (an older man who I never met) to stop at the bank. I realize the man is that thing again and I need to get out of the car. He stops at this large bank, the sign and building something out of the twenties or thirties. Vintage looking. This is when my alarm goes off.

Recurring themes: Amusement Parks, blond women, a child in danger, something lurking inside people, family estrangement.

Someone was in the back of work about to smoke a blunt so they ripped it open and said "there's tobacco in here" because he only smoked marijuana, not tobacco.

I don't work at Bojangles in real life but now I was and we had weekly status reports and a really high up drive-thru that you could barely see above. I told the new girl to smile and wave if she gets a cop through drive-thru.

We had to take a photo of the best part of our lives. I then played Starcraft 2 in zigzags of orange.

I was about to get off at 4 at work and Woody came in and I asked him if I could go even though he had been fired that day.

We had a cash drop at work and I had one twenty left afterward. Me and Becca talked about how we had a new manager and thus now we do cash drops, as we did not ever do them before.

I was playing Starcraft 2 and had marines killing something.