non-lucid

Morning of January 10, 2017. Tuesday.



After exploring an unknown but interesting region in an unfamiliar rural area, I eventually start thinking about fishing. It seems to be late afternoon. I find an area where several others are fishing, mostly males in their thirties. There is a building on one longer side of a pond with a pathway just wide enough to walk on. The rectangular pond is about three-fourths a city block in length though only about half that length at the ends.

When I decide to fish, I see that there are too many bobbers on the water’s surface near the side I first go to. As I walk along the pond’s length near the building, I see bobber after bobber on the surface (as well as the trailing fishing line) and a number of fishing poles along the bank that extend over the entire length of the pond on that side, the setups of which apparently belong to the group of three men who are sitting at the end of the pond. This annoys me but I do not become very angry.

I walk back to where the other three males are (even though it would have made more sense to keep going around the corner to the other longer side of the pond to search for a space to fish). After a short time, that longer side of the pond I had just walked back along seems clear (though there is neither a memory nor enough time implied to have passed for the men to have actually reeled it all in or to have gathered up their equipment). There are only a couple areas where bobbers and line are still visible on that side. For a short time, I walk in midair above the water (not on the water as in certain past dreams) to get past a corner. I do this without thinking it to be unusual.

I sit down to fish. I have a soft plastic jig body (shad-style soft plastic lure) and slide it onto a hook. An unknown male to my right tells me that I am not doing it by the proper standards. I take it off and slowly put it back onto the hook and he seems satisfied. “You know the fish in here aren’t that big?” he asks me. I nod, regardless of not knowing anything about the area. Still, when I look into the water, I can clearly see under the surface. There are several very large walleye and carp. I intend on catching a walleye.

After I cast my line, I see that I am almost immediately snagged on something. It looks like a large Ragdoll cat swimming under the water. I try to get the hook disentangled from its fur, which is along the side of its body near the middle. An unfamiliar boy of about ten wades out and is eventually able to take the hook out. I am not sure if the cat belongs to him or if he is there to perform a service (as an actual parks and recreation employee). The cat remains swimming in the water. I notice the boy seems to be dressed as a boy scout or parks employee, so may actually work here.

I ask the male who is still to my right about the “other area to fish” with the pretense of me being familiar with the area. I hint at it being a place beginning with “m” and pretending not to remember the full name. He asks me if I mean K-Mart, and I tentatively nod. I then ask him if it is legal to fish there presently. It seems it is.

---

• Fishing, a common dream event for me since early childhood, represents the subliminal desire of the limited dream self to bring the emergent consciousness to the surface in order to wake or at least increase awareness. Water symbolizes sleep and a fish on the line is the downgraded conscious self identity developing coherence (often increasing in size and strength) when being caught.
• This is more specifically confirmed as a self-initiated waking precursor due to the behavior of the personified preconscious. Typically, the preconscious is only hostile when the personified subconscious (dream self) does not want to wake or (metaphorically) initiate waking. As fishing is an act of deliberately seeking the emergent consciousness, the preconscious is passive here. He even helps me continue my task without aggressiveness or treating me strangely.
• This is more specifically confirmed as a self-initiated waking precursor due to the behavior of the personified preconscious. Typically, the preconscious is only hostile when the personified subconscious (dream self) does not want to wake or (metaphorically) initiate waking. As fishing is an act of deliberately seeking the emergent consciousness, the preconscious is passive here. He even helps me continue my task without aggressiveness or treating me strangely.
• The personified preconscious rarely appears in fishing dreams (again, due to what fishing metaphorically represents in real time). He only appears here due to the delay in the waking transition, which was caused by my own hesitancy and non-lucid dream control in creating the additional bobbers and too many random additional "lines of communication".
• The cat in the water is a factor of the circadian rhythms of nighttime (and the dream state during a particular sleep cycle) and has also appeared as the final waking prompt in past dreams though is underwater here based on the time of my dream (after sunrise). Catching the cat would be akin to enhancing the essence of night (or night-based thoughts), in contrast to the “correct” waking goal.
• The reference to K-Mart is a mixed waking prompt and dream sign, since I associate K-Mart with clothes and getting up and getting dressed.

---

I couldn't remember much of my dream last night, except that it involved me playing a videogame that seemed like Stardew Valley but as an action RPG, and naming a horse in that game with some long name.

I later went back in time to look around America.

1/8/2017
Non-lucid: I was a part of an oddly large family. We were moving from boat to boat to live. A male was helping to load the boat w/ clothes that he had put in some kind of order. He had to dive into & under the water to retrieve them. Later we all were put into groups. Grouping by male & female & put into separate boats. I didn't recognize anyone, even the ones that were supposed to be my family. I was now the person who had to dive under the water to retrieve the females clothes. I am so not sure what this dream means.

Today: Dream 1/Non-lucid: I'm in a house w/ an incredible amount of rooms which is a common dream sign for me. My grown daughters & their kids live there also. My daughters keep telling me to get the ceilings fixed because there are holes in some places & I keep telling them that it requires money that we don't have. Some person I don't know tells me to at least get an estimate but I persist & saying that they will call social services & take the kids away because I can't afford to have it fixed & it will cause unnecessary troubles for us. IRL Meesha wakes me up & I pull my covers over my head & chain the same dream scene but I'm lucid now & the scene changes. (D2: Lucid) I'm in a store that looks like a big box warehouse like a Sam's Club. A man appears & I'm behind him & we seem to be waiting in line like you would be at a Wal-Mart Pharmacy. I just bumped right into him as I fell into the scene. I apologize & explain that I am deaf in my left ear. IRL this happens a lot because of my hearing loss so naturally I automatically say this. I'm confused that I just got dropped into the scene this way & turn around to take in my surroundings. I see rows & rows of these absurdly large bins are there. It reminds me of another dream I had about Christmas, when it wasn't remotely Christmas season. The bins just go on & on w/ discount items in these big bins. Meesha is relentless & pounces on me IRL & wakes me from this. How annoying. I would've just got up & shut the door but Josh is still here from Christmas break so I can't shut my door incase he needs to use our bathroom.

Mike & I have been making changes in our house to make the lighting low & calming. But right now my son is home from college & has interrupted what has been our only time off for a long period like this. I'm still waiting for the clips to come in to keep our lights in place. We also changed the lighting in our bedroom & only watch TV in the living room which is liberating but unfortunately disturbed by our son being here. He yells into his damn headset while we are watching tv & sleeping but Mike never says anything to him. I just come off as been irrational which is insane. I just want to hear what we are watching. Hence me dropping into the lucid scene. I do not want to be forced back into my bedroom. It was the whole point of getting a new TV & system for Christmas. We are finally at a place in our lives that we need to be alone & can't be. So I guess my dreams actually make sense if I look at it in that respect. He is in his 5th yr of college so that means about a year & a half before we are actually alone unless he gets an internship that isn't here in our town. But even then he will come back for his breaks to see his friends.

Bed @ 2310
Woke @ 0630

Factory puzzler
I'm playing a first-person game set inside a factory with a very industrial feeling to it. Lots of panels, catwalks, etc. I'm in a long corridor which has two channels, one on each side. My goal is to use portals (e.g. from Portal) to get large (boulder-sized), rolling spheres from one end to the other. Right now, I'm concentrating on the one on the right, completely ignoring the one on the left. I open a portal in a wall it's about to hit along with another portal on the floor past the wall, and I see the sphere roll through the portal and fly a few feet into the air on the other side. I have the feeling that was the wrong move; I'm probably going to have to start this level over.


Sneaking snack
I'm sneaking through what feels like an office building. I'm in a fairly large room. A door is to my right, a conveyor belt is moving right-to-left in front of me, and there's a door at the far end of the conveyor belt. I take out a small glass object and throw it at the door at the far end of the belt, and the object shatters. At least the conveyor belt seems to collect the shards. I hope no one heard the crash.

Now I'm in a wide hallway. I realize a janitor is headed my way, so I turn and look at the choices in a large vending machine in the middle of the hallway. I'm amazed at the prices: anywhere from $8-$9, depending on whether the snack has chocolate in it or not.

Now I'm entering a slightly darkened room. At first, I think it's empty. I see a strange grid on the floor in the middle of the room and try to figure out what I'm seeing. As I look at it, I realize that the grid is actually surrounded by rows of people - students, I believe. Someone is talking about a weapon that Adam built when the world was created. It's hidden under Atlanta, and they need to find and deactivate it before it "wakes" and destroys the city.


Vacation packing
I'm in a bedroom along with my mother-in-law and my sister-in-law. They're packing, but I'm really tired and lay down. Now I'm loading the car. Now I'm dividing snacks between the two cars. A "plastic shoebox" is full of pre-wrapped brownies. I'm counting them to make sure there are enough for my wife and our kids in the van plus myself and my father-in-law in the other car. Thankfully, we just have enough for everyone.

Now we're in a little repair shop, parked on some kind of maintenance pad. I walk around the car to the driver's side, take a cable from a female employee, and plug it into my hubcap. Another employee tells me that the diagnostics all pass, so we don't need anything done, and I'm embarrassed to have taken up their time for nothing. He reassures me that they'd rather have me bring it in when I don't need to than to have something break on the road.

I am at my mother's beach condo in Boca Raton, Florida. I just bought a new classical guitar and I'm very excited about playing it. It is in a plush, hardwood case and it gives off a wonderful smell. But for some reason, I am playing my old, crappy guitar. I can't stop playing it. I want to play the new one, but all I can do is look at it, smell it. I am playing The Animals' "House of the Rising Sun" on my old guitar, over and over again. I say the chords out loud as I finger them: "A minor", "F major", "C major" etc. Someone is in the room with me as I play the song, and me saying the chords aloud lends itself to me giving this person a lesson. I suddenly will myself to remember I have a NEW GUITAR; why the hell am I still playing my old guitar? I am finally able to put it down and open the case for the new guitar. I look at it, smell it and reminisce all the old, wonderful memories of me playing it. I see all the dings and blemishes and scratches in the wood and remember how I got them.

It suddenly dawns on me I am looking again at my old guitar; I do not have a new guitar. It is my old guitar and I realize I love it. It smells great and even looks great with its dark walnut stock and craftsmanship -- even with all the dings and scratches. Dreamt 12/20/2016

9/1/16
Dream 1: Talking with a group of girls at a water park or picnic, someplace like that. I did some other stuff but forgot it when I woke up.

Almost Fell Off Bed

I was sitting on the toilet than appeared on a bed inside a room that felt like mine.I was half aware it was a dream but it still felt like it was my room. I turned to move away from the person I felt next to me and thought about how it better not be my dad. But as I looked to the black carpet, desk and walls I wondered what would happen if I managed to move my real body through the dream. Than After moving my arm around curiously I felt myself falling out of the bed slowly bracing myself for impact with the ground. I didn't though cause someone pulled me back up. After that I had another false awakening but appeared in the same spot and after seeing someone hidden in the bed covers in front of me I became fully lucid.

There was a small silver television on next to us playing the news and a radio that played classical music. I could see the t.v. at the corner of my eye but didn't look at where the radio was and focused on the person under the covers. I thought it was Dawn and hugged him but his face was covered and i became curious. "Why do you have that on you?"I asked. "I don't want you to see my face" he replied back. I decided to respect his space and leave it on.After I woke up I kind of regretted not taking it off though.

Where are you going!?

I was non lucid doing something that I can't recall.When I become lucid I try to place intent on having a AP kind of dream which I will call spiritual dream. I appeared on a familiar street I've walked many times. I could feel the usual heavy feeling I get when I attempt OBE dreams but it was just a vivid dream. The streets were empty and as I looked to the buildings and sky I called out for Dawn.For a brief moment no one was around but than Dawn appeared but I couldn't see him. His presence was rippling though so I kind of knew where he was. I also felt him touch me. He seemed to be in a rush though. "Dawn where are you? Why can't I see you?". I asked him as he kept pacing around me. He told me something but than I asked him to do the thing that we only know which is like a code for us to recognize each other.

He than walked behind me which is the first step but didn't follow through with it all. I thought it was probably because he was distracted than focused more on what was around me and my senses so that I could see him. It ends up working and I can see Dawn's appearance. He is light skin, of course tall, he has light blue eyes, has what looks like a buzz cut and is wearing a navy blue shiny military or Navy suit with gold badges and a navy blue hat with a golden outline. "He looks so cool in that uniform"I thought but it just makes him more nervous. I also notice that there is a black limo near us and people stepping out and standing nearby. He than picks me up and starts running. I can see snow appearing and recognize Christmas decorations on a green truck with small elves on it. "Oo~It's Christmas"I say excitedly. He continues to run with me than turns left and enters a tall brownish red or purplish brick building. He runs up a slightly rotating bone white stair that goes up and lets go of me. There are people present too.

I run up after him calling his name than notice the people behind me who want to catch him. "Dawn! Wait! Dawn!"I call out noticing that I'm getting slower and heavier. He is also leaving me behind which is kind of disheartening. I don't give up though and continue running up. But than his appearance fades and becomes rippling again. When I finally reach the floor he is on I watch him enter the apartment than turn the stove on. Something is on it and I take note that it looks like a studio apartment and the lights are dimmed.

"Dawn!"I call out than look to the people who were after him. But they turn around and leave. I than notice two old ladys sitting on a chair with boxes of chocolates on their table stand. "Oo~ Candy~"I say but than push back the urge to go for it. I try moving but I still feel heavy and can't really see Dawn. "Dawn! I can't see you! Dawn!"I call out again. He exits the apartment than touches my arms with both his hands than reassures me that he is there and to not worry. I calm down since he came back than watch him reenter the apartment. After waiting the dream shifts and I'm on a pink bed with a fat man who is holding me down with both his legs. "I'm not Dawn"he says than starts laughing. I grab both his legs than flip him out of the bed after standing up. He hits the ground than I think about how this could work for a Dhl mission. But than after I punch his arm he punches me back and I fly back after blocking.Woke up after that.


(I do not own pic)

There was some man running around the streets of some city with a gun. Police chase him all the time but in the end they were helpless. Later on when it was evening everyone gathered by local store in my home village. The man with gun was there, everyone gathered by the store due to him. People were talking and stuff, but everyone was scared. When the gunman lost his focus I grabbed his gun and pointed it at him. Everyone sat on the ground, somewhat sad. I shouted that they only listened to him because he had a gun, which he used as argument of force to keep them there. The man took another gun, two more people with shotguns appeared. My pistol turned into double barrelled shotgun. One of the gunmen said that all these people don't want me here and that they'll cleanse the streets. I replied that I'll start cleansing them with him, then ran away, found cover and pointed my shotgun at the gunman.

I am with a friend in a place where there are lots of people coming and going, like at a mall. The person I am with is a young and heavy-set guy with glasses who works with me. He looks like Mark David Chapman, the guy who shot John Lennon. We see two young blonde girls walk by us, and I challenge him to go pick them up. As he does this, I go and look for some clothes to wear on the date. I can't decide on anything appropriate; I decide to wear a pair of overalls (wtf?). Then I have trouble styling my hair. Meanwhile, the girls are still waiting and I am getting anxious. When I finally get myself ready, I discover the girls are gone. I go outside and see the road the girls supposedly walked down. This road is foggy in my dream recall. My father then appears, with Suzie, his new wife. They pull up beside me in an SUV. The two of them offer to drive me to the girls. I get in their vehicle. As we travel down the road in the direction the girls went, we discover a British police investigator has died mysteriously in an outside stairwell of building. My father and Suzie stop the car by the crime scene and offer to help the other detectives solve the mystery. I am frustrated, as I know the girls are still waiting for me.

At this point, I look over to see two British girls being interviewed. They are saying to the camera that they were with the investigator when he met his doom in the stairwell. According to them, his death was accidental. I realize these were probably the girls we picked up in the mall, who got tired of waiting for me and left. It is not clear to me how or when they became involved in the investigator's death. In the dream I am not trying to pick up these girls, and I have seemingly forgotten of my pursuit of the original two blondes at the mall. A homicide detective suddenly approaches me, my father and Suzie and asks us to follow him. The detective's face is discolored (a missed dream sign).

We follow him through several rooms and across several stages and stairwells. We end up inside an empty theatre. The detective is moving quickly and I am trying to keep up. I lose sight of him as he disappears through a door on the other side of a stage. As I begin to run across the stage I suddenly hear, "No running, Paul" from the seats in front of me. It is the detective's voice, and he is now standing there with my parents. His admonishment of "stop running" really pissed me off in the dream: it debased me and made me feel like a child being disciplined. Dreamt 12/19/2016

I saw my dream in different perspectives, one of me going for a job interview for... something. One of two employees discussing how hard it is to get a job with the interviewer. I was given a stack of forms to fill which I don't remember filling. It took forever. I also had the perspecrive of someone else who came to the interview.

I waited at the office to be accepted to my job but I woke up first.

Vague fragment about looking out window and a man is sleeping on the roof.

This was almost a nightmare.
In one part, Homer Simpson had to crawl through a tube stretching across the ocean to get to the Futurama universe. After that fragment, It cut to a sixteen year old girl with black hair and
a black dress visiting a medicine shop. She asked for some medicine meant to make her smaller. She did this every day and as every day passed, she appeared to be younger and younger with a higher pitched voice every time. On the third day, she looked ten years younger. That day, she took a different treatment. Instead of the usual srynge into the arm, she got it sprayed all over her body. When she returned, she appeared to be between the ages of 5 months old to one year old. After that, she was probably the size of a Game Cube disk. By this point her voice was made of unintelligable high pitched scratches. She was then taken to a small living room like compartment where everyone else who did this was forced to live. I remember that one of them was trying to scare another one. It might have worked, but I don't remember that well. I then woke up.

Another crappy recall night. I wasn't feeling well, so I went to sleep at 9PM and woke at midnight lol. Then I crashed again 6:43AM and woke at noon... but it was too cold to get out of bed so I slept for another hour.
Then I talked to hubby and lost the dreams I had managed to hold on to.
Except one. I dreamed I had a baby girl but I forgot about her for 4 days and she was in the car. I was terrified that she was dead, but when I opened the door, she had the sleepiest, sweetest, happiest smile.
My ex-hubby was the father and I was living with my grams. That's it.

I know I also dreamed of food and clones (thanks to binging Orphan Black) and cats, but I've lost the specifics.

Fitbit info: 6:43AM- 12:01PM (it never gets my wake up right). 5 times restless for total of 1hour 16 minutes. Sleep equivalence of 4 hours 2 minutes.
I kept waking in pain. My shoulder was subluxing as was a hip. My nose stopped up every time I laid down. Perhaps it's time to start considering a real bed. I started sleeping on a desk because it was the only thing that kept my back from hurting. Now my back is starting to hurt all the time but so is everything else lol

8/1/16
Dream 1: I am in the car going to a football game with my family

Dream 2: At the cricket with a bunch of people, find a diary book as a present, five i back to whoever had lost it

Dream 3: In a castle like hogwarts, invisibility cloak, almost getting found, play basketball after, my opponent cheats, then discus politics

Dream 4: I was in a bookshop, see a lot of classics, a nietzsche book and a chinese classic.

This was from my dream journal notes from the night of 1/05-1/06. Unfortunately I did not remember any dreams from last night. Even though I got a good amount of sleep, the quality was poor and I woke up a lot.

Dream 1: I was riding an Evolution ride, with a bunch of people. This included my tulpa, Tess, and an African American gentleman. I don't remember who else was there, but I remember many of the seats were filled.

The difference was that we were inside, with a floor beneath us, so it wasn't as scary as the one I rode in the waking world a few years ago. Anyway, after a while it started going higher, and we realized that it was actually on the inside of a sky tower. So cool So we were actually riding a ride inside of another ride. Some weren't too happy about this, but I was excited. We reached the top of the tower, and then our cabin containing the Evolution dropped and free fell, which took me off guard. I wasn't expecting that at all!

After the ride finished, I got off and I found my brother and sister waiting for me by the exit. I'm not sure if they rode the ride too or not. There was an exit sign that said to exit through certain shapes (there were differently-shaped holes in the fence). I found a random hole in the fence and exited the ride, and then the dream faded.

Dream 2: False awakening! It was a Sunday morning. I was lying in bed, sort of waking up, but it was still like 6 AM so I decided to go back to sleep. I was looking for something in my bag. I found a thumbtack in there for some reason, and I immediately started having OCD fears about poking myself in the eye with it. I remember finding it weird because prior to that point, my OCD hadn't bothered me with that. But it wasn't quite enough to make me realize that I was dreaming. I got very close, though. Then I accidentally turned a kids' meal toy -- a puffball -- into a purple-black color, and it yelled out something. So now we have talking toys. Then my brother responded to the toy and then he woke up. (?) Oh, right! We BOTH woke up at an apartment in college, but we were roommates (not true in the waking world). Then he said "Oh no it's like 9:39!" and apparently we had church at 11 and ran the risk of being late. I freaked out for some reason, even though that should have been sufficient time to get ready, and then I woke up.

Dream 3: Okay, I don't actually have any personal recollection of this one, but hey, it's in my dream journal.

I was working at an office. There were a lot of people. Including an African American guy. (Same as before, maybe? I don't know why my brain keeps brining that to mind, of all things). Someone asked "Will you take the plates?" so maybe I went to a restaurant? I don't remember.

Dreams from 1/06-1/07: I had already packed my DJ for college, so I had to type these into my phone, and boy is that annoying when you're half asleep!

Dream 1: I was chased by some "sketchy people". One of them had an accent. I nimbly jumped away.

Dream 2: I was on a boat, and it was rocking quite a bit in the water. I talked to a friend of mine that I haven't seen in forever.

Dream 3: I was at a zoo. I can't remember which one. I was trying to talk to a lady there (an employee), but she was not interested in interacting with me or anyone else there. There was a panda that had been transferred from the Santa Barbara zoo. There were some little kids who I thought were annoying who wanted to watch a movie. Just a disclaimer: IRL, I actually don't find little kids to be annoying at all. I think they're cool. But we have different opinions in our dreams, I guess? :O

This is the part where I became lucid. This is the gist of what I said: Within a dream, I was walking fully clothed in a river with many other people. There was an attraction of some sort. Might have been the river itself. Then, a typo reads "Loodpskarr mentioned case which I forget. My phone amen skethblkm are sodden." I have no idea what I actually meant by that, but I think I must have gotten my phone soaked in the river. OH! It was a Samsung! That's how I realized that I was dreaming!

I talked to my aunt, who just randomly happened to be there, and told her that I thought I was dreaming, since I don't use Android phones IRL. I'm an iOS kind of guy. And then I woke up. :/ No time to do anything cool! D:

After only 20 minutes, I had another dream. I was taking a Spanish class, and could do it but I was rusty. However I was confident that I could improve with time.