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State: Almost 5 pm, humid, and I can hear a CEP audio, and the TV from afar.

I was completely awake. I had just been dreaming a few minutes ago, and then now I can "see through the eyelids." I can see the mirror, the walls, the windows (which was open, and there are tall grasses visible beyond it, but in reality, it's closed, and there are no grasses behind it).

I can also see my right hand. I tried moving it, and I felt it rise, but I can see my right hand and arm stay put. I thought I was probably almost astral traveling. I moved my head, twisting it, to get out of the body, together with my arms and torso. I then vaguely saw my face, so close to mine, but shaven. I felt like an outgrowth trying to cut itself off from the body. It was very hard.

I finally got out, but I no longer see my body on the bed. And I'm in a different room. My view was very hazy, and I can see a cabinet/divider in the room. I am across the bed in the room. There's a door to the outside behind me (there's no door to the outside in my room). I rubbed my hands together to stay more lucid, and I commanded "clarity." Nothing happened. I saw my bed (different color, size, etc.), and a glimpse of my "body," and I'm back in my body.

I almost woke up, but somehow, something clicked in my mind, and I'm in the middle state between waking up and asleep once more. I thought I was really awake this time. I still can't move my body, but I can still feel moving my "astral arms."

After a short while, though, I just decided to close my eyes, and I "opened" them up again. Still same problem. I started to get anxious. I worried "What if I can't wake up from this?"

I closed my eyes again, for a longer time, and I sensed another click or pop in my mind, and I knew I was "awake." I opened my eyes. It looks the same, but a little different. I didn't dare try moving my hands, afraid that I'm still stuck. After a while, I moved, and it moved. I'm awake.

non-lucid - Notes - lucid

13-09-11 I am lying in my bed and I can hear Silas talking to someone, a dream entitiy. For some reason I think he is talking about a location I know and that he is part of IOSDP. I keep thinking windmill, which is then repeated by the dream entity and he talks about bikes as well. I think I know the location he is talking about so I think hard about Vesterguard, and this is eventually repeated by the dream entity as well, first as guard and then the full name.

Not sure if the above section was a FA or HH → pre REM dreaming.

I am lucid and the dream starts forming. I am in the sea, swimming around unable to get to shore, know I am dreaming, but my vision is blurry and I have limited control. I see light in the horizon out over the water and what would be a sea port town. I eventually stabilise the dream through breathing.

I am waiting for Silas or ”Crusher” (definitely a name with a C, though I will refer to him as Silas from now on) or whatever to get out of the water. I decide to finish off the TotM tasks. Walking on water was simple enough have, but I have to try a bit harder to pull out a ball of water from the ocean mentally, the water keeps rippling where I try and pull out the ball, and sling it maybe 20 metre in a forward arch (this is what I tried to do in the first lucid I had, but got interrupted).

Silas comes into shore and I take him to the place I thought was the place, but it turns out he doesn't recognise it it. We talk a bit about us both being new to this whole IOSDP thing and that we will just continue marching on writing down our stuff and trying to meet.

Silas takes off and I try and do a cool back flip onto a little hut, that turns into a chest in my grand father's house, albeit a very tall chest and the back flip is sub par. I jump down and someone is using a crowbar to tear through a thin wall.

”We have nearly destroyed my grand mother's house” I say, think to either Silas or the person using the crowbar. I am in the basement and I say ”Well, see you around” and try and fly out, but can't get through the walls or windows, I try and open the windows and now I have the crowbar, they are too small, I try another one and get stuck looking at some girl/woman who I tell I have been playing around and stuff. She tells me I have been playing with (don't recall name) a baby girl, because apparently I have colour in my face.

Notes: Though lucid the entire time even with access to waking memory (cf. The TotM tasks) I don't realise that I am talking to Silas, a TV show character and treat him as a member of the IOSDP. Aside from that the control I had in this dream was horrible apart from the TotM stuff.
…

I am in possession of copious amounts of weed, bags that would indicate in the kilos. This particular theme is recurring over what I believe to be a series of dreams. But it is all very fragmented.

I get back from a party and I am pretty pissed, I think I try and skin up without much success.

I pick up some weed somewhere and bring it to a friends house, which results in the house getting raided as I bought it of the mum of the girl I was visiting and the dealer didn't want weed around her daughter.

I run into an old female friend of mine from way back, who explains that they have gone out to town recently where they brought “the other Rasmus” and Sisse and they ended up hooking up and having sex. I was surprised to find that this actually hurt considering it was 8 years ago and that I was only with her for 3 months approximately.

I return to the first girl's house where I find that the weed I brought the night before is still there. I start making a roach and look for paper. I have some in my pocket, but it is all crumbled up and I am unsure if the clue will stick. Doesn't matter in the end I find some on the table. The roach becomes really weird and some woman calls me from downstairs before I can roll a spliff.

I am talking to a friend who have found a stash of wed of maybe 3 kilos. He is talking about how it is located in a residential area and he has seen it quite some times just lying there. He argues we could make some profit of it by starting to sell a bit.

We are under a bridge with graffiti on the wall and in a room which looks sterilised and metallic, though shaped like a container on the inside. This is where the aforementioned 3 kilos of weed is. We get busted and try and explain that we could sell for the dealer, but he doesn't care explains that he deals in larger lumps and as far as he is aware all we do is owe him and eights.
…

In a sauna/steam room with a lot of men and I am about to fight my dad. I keep placing well placed uppercuts. He warns me that he will get going soon, there isn't a lot of room to move and I am afraid of bumping into other naked men.
…

Kaiser complementing my new jacket and informing me that he will start shopping in second hand shops as well.

12.09.2011

My car's gears go Berserk! (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I was driving at night by myself in my car. I pulled inside the parking lot of a mall. When I tried to put the car in park, the stick moved itself to Long. Staring at it in amazement, I tried to put it on park again. The car made a weird noise and I realized I did it without hitting the breaks.

The car was in park, but it was still moving, gaining some speed. I started to step harder the breaks without success. I used the emergency break, but the car still moved, at a slow speed, but moved. My wife trying to get into the car, but she needed to do it while my car was moving. On a curv, she jumped inside the car. we both tried to stop it without success.

After a few minutes, I was alone again in the car. I entered in a weird basement, still driving my car. I finally managed to stop my car, but realized the place was closed.

Dream 1 (dreamtime: approx 5-7 minutes):
I knock on an apartment door. I am on maybe the third or second story. Some shouts, "come in, I'm in the shower!" I take a left once inside and try to peek into another bathroom because I think I hear my friend in there, but I have trouble doing so, and instead I empty my bladder in some rather nice looking green toilet( like you might find in a major airport). Then I realize I'm dreaming because the lady who invited me in is singing and saying random stuff in the shower. The scene changes to my room, and I try to look around, but it is as if my eyelids are half glued shut and my eyes won't focus. I collapse on my bed, wondering how to solve this problem. I lift my head an inch, but move my actual head instead, waking me up.

Dream 1 (dreamtime: approx 5-7 minutes):
I knock on an apartment door. I am on maybe the third or second story. Some shouts, "come in, I'm in the shower!" I take a left once inside and try to peek into another bathroom because I think I hear my friend in there, but I have trouble doing so, and instead I empty my bladder in some rather nice looking green toilet( like you might find in a major airport). Then I realize I'm dreaming because the lady who invited me in is singing and saying random stuff in the shower. The scene changes to my room, and I try to look around, but it is as if my eyelids are half glued shut and my eyes won't focus. I collapse on my bed, wondering how to solve this problem. I lift my head an inch, but move my actual head instead, waking me up.

i dreamed all my teeth fell out. i was afraid of the bloody mess, but there wasn't any, just holes in my mouth.

i was given the option of calling into work indefinitely to help fight this ongoing playful war between some factions that hated eachother but only in a pretend kind of way. they kept it up just for the fun of the fight.

DJ Log: September 12, 2011 – 7:45AM (USA Eastern)
· NON-DREAM · NOTES · DREAM · LUCID ·

I'm standing in a large luxurious house, talking to with a guy and his wife about what they want to do with their yacht. He's telling me about how they're tired of owning it and don't want to pay the docking fees anymore. The lady asks me if I want it. I say, "Yes." She hands me the keys and title, then offers to take me to Baltimore to see it. I hop in the car with them.

On the ride, I'm digging through the package of information and paperwork for it. There are a couple of small DIY electronic project kits in the box of paperwork. In an envelope, I find the title for the yacht. As I am riding, the woman says, "Keep the furniture and everything that's in it. We don't want any of it." ...I wake up...

DJ Log: September 12, 2011 – 5:00AM (USA Eastern)
· NON-DREAM · NOTES · DREAM · LUCID ·

I am walking around at a gay pride event. Sometimes, I'm gliding along the ground instead of walking. I'm following a secondary line of people through a building, parallel to the main crowd, then out onto the street. Once outside, I stop and talk to a couple of people who are hanging out near a dumpster.

We were walking around a place that I knew from my memories. My 8th grade retreat. Of course, nothing looked the same, but I still seemed to remember it all. She gave me a yearbook that she had just whisked up out of thin air. I looked through it and remembered all the great times I never really had. We went to go sit down on a hillside that was basically just dirt. As we sat there, admiring the view, we talked about our memories and eventually got to the topic of how much we missed each other. I got close to her, wrapped my arms around her waist while she laid back on my chest...when suddenly two women passed by. They screamed her name, “R____!” with a hint of anger in their voice. We turned our heads towards them. She whispered the words “oh shit.”. She sat up straight and asked what they wanted. They told her to come down and they needed to ask her something...as soon as she was close to them, one of them looked at me and mouthed the words, “stay away from her” in a way of trying to give me advice. But something struck me...stay away? How could I stay away? ….stay away from someone so close to me? Stay away from someone who means the world to me? Stay away from someone who understands me the most? From someone whom I would like to stay with for the rest of my life?...stay away from someone that I love so much, its indescribable?.....impossible. Never.
I got up and made my way after her down the hill. They finished talking and we walked back to school, which was apparently close by. As we passed by H building I saw a good friend of mine, G_____. I talked with him and messed around but then I noticed something. She left and vanished somewhere. The bell rang and I walked to my 4th period, she wasn't there. After class was over, I called her and asked her where she was. She said to me in a panting voice “walking to school, why??” I yelled in shock “walking to school?!? what the fuck! You were right next to me!” with that she seemed to have no answer and hung up the phone. I was very angry.
I walked towards my locker and I happened to see her chatting with other people and I pulled her aside. For some reason everything that I said earlier went out the window and I poured out all my feelings for her. Yet she already knows about my feelings...but I guess not quite enough. As I pulled her aside, I grew a sincere face and said the words “I love you R____.” she agreed back and said the same thing. I explained to her how much she meant to me and that I don't want to be “just” friends. I wanted us to be more than that. I said “this is to the point where I can't just tell you how much I love you, I want to be able to show my affection...I want to be able to hold your hands like this(as if you were playing a game of mercy)...I want to be able to hold you against me and place a kiss on your lips” with that we stared into each others eyes, wanting to do just that. But something was holding us back...somehow, someway, we overcame it, and I quickly yet gracefully placed a kiss on her lips and didn't move. The feelings all sparked up and flew into the air like fireworks and burst into the letters H.A.P.P.I.N.E.S.S...I woke up from all the excitement, and yet became disappointed....I'll never know her response.

I wasn't really able to write these down until now, I just had lots of things to do.
I have noticed that my dream recall has been acting a bit weird over the past few days.
I just seem to remember a ton of dreams, though most of them are very vague and fragmented.
My dreams don't seem to be more vivid or any longer though, so I'm not really sure if it's "better".
Nevertheless it feels weird remembering like ~10 different fragments a day.
These are a few interesting ones.



Totm Attempt #1: Butterfly
I WILD during an afternoon nap, trying to complete the Totm.
I'm quite confident that I'll manage to succeed on the first try.

My dream starts on "the beach".
For some reason some of my WILD's randomly seem to start out on this beach.
It always looks the same, and it is always dusk.
I remember the Totm and approach the water in order to walk on it.
This is going to be easy I have done this many times before.

But as I approach the beach I suddenly spot a butterfly.
It is extremely colorful, with very colorful and vivid patterns on its wings.
It's emitting glowing particles.
I follow it, intrigued as to where it is going and completely forget about the Totm.


Totm Attempt #2:
I have another dream of being lost in an unknown hotel.
I become lucid and remember the Totm.
The dream is unstable and I'm not thinking very clearly.
Instead of stabilizing, I start running around aimlessly, attempting to find a water surface.
The dream quickly fades to black and ends.


The hibiscus girl:
I had another dream about the hibiscus girl: Another mysterious woman / Emotional and sensory overload - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views
Unfortunately my recall of it is quite bad.

This time we are on the surface of another planet.
She has a red hibiscus attached to her left ear, looking very similar to the one drawn on her bikini last time.
We're having a discussion, I demand to know who she is.
She refuses to tell me though.
It seems clear by now that she is reading my DJ, I'm considering that she might be a DV member.
I make the comment that she has an "unfair advantage" over me, because she's able to read my DJ, yet I know nothing about her.

But she keeps denying my requests, and says that she likes being in control.
I remember that last time she was able to drag me to another place by simply looking into my eyes.
I attempt to do the same thing to her, and manage to drag her to the beach.

This surprises her quite a bit, but it also seems to amuse her.
I say that I never stated that I write everything down in my online DJ, she might be in for a few surprises.
She makes a comment that makes me believe that this is some sort of game to her.
I somehow understand this reasoning though and begin to share it.


Totm Attempt #3:
I decide to attempt the Totm yet again. I'm determined to complete both tasks.
I do it during an afternoon nap yet again since I had some success last time, except that I got distracted.

Surprisingly, I enter the dream on the beach yet again.
This time I decide to stabilize the dream though, and calm my mind.
I rub my hands and slowly approach the sea.
I feel the sand beneath my toes. It's still moderately warm.

For some reason I'm a bit nervous as I start walking on the water surface.
Oddly enough I seem to be afraid to fail, even though I've done it many times before.
Fortunately, it works flawlessly.
I walk on the water, deeper into the sea with my arms stretched out for additional balance.

Alright, so far so good, controlling elements is next.
I look at my right hand and make it catch on fire.
This is quite straightforwards as I have manipulated fire many times before.
But what other element could I possibly manipulate?
Water...? No. That's probably too hard.

I create an arc of lightning between two of my fingers.
I think that I have completed the Totm for a moment, but then realize that lighting isn't exactly one of the 4 elements.
What were the other ones again?
Fire, Water... Earth? I wouldn't know what to do with earth...
Wind it is.

I compress some of the air around me into my right fist and release it forwards.
This creates a shock and air is propelled forwards.
The pressure upsets the water surface.

I'm not really satisfied with the result though.
I do the same thing again, this time compressing much more air.
This time it creates a small tornado, that runs flat over the water surface.
It lifts some of it up and sprays it all over the place.

I'm quite satisfied, and happy that I managed to complete both tasks within a single dream.
I decide to dive into the sea to see if I'll find something interesting, but it doesn't take long until I wake up.


Destiny:
After a long time, I've started having dream fragments of "Destiny" yet again: Recurring dream about a spaceship mission to find extraterrestrial life. - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views
None of them drove "the plot" forward though.
I was always on board the Destiny completing a random task.
My memories of the dream fragments are quite vague.

12.09.2011

Non Lucid WILD (WILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I woke up at 3:00 am, and stayed up until 4:00 am. During that hour, I decided what I would do in case I succeeded at WILDing, I listened to music and thought about random stuff. At 4:00 am I decided to go back to sleep and decided that I would "catch myself" right before falling asleep. I was so relaxed that I began falling asleep almost right away. I might have lost consciousness for a little while, but then it hit me. I had to WILD. At that same moment the heavy SP wave came in, and soon after I decided to make the transition.

I stood up from bed, not sure whether I had succeeded, or if I was still awake. I plugged my nose, but it was hard to breathe. It felt extremely real, but I decided to walk to my room's door. Maybe if I explored the house I'd be able to tell whether it was real or a dream. As soon as I got to my door, I heard my mom waking my brother up. For some reason that convinced me that it was not a dream, so I walked back to my bed. Just as I was about to get into my bed, I looked at my window. I would have loved to jump through it if it was a dream, and fly away. Sadly, this was no dream... I went back to bed and fell asleep.

When I woke up to go to University, I realized that I had in fact WILDed successfully, and that I had completely missed a lucid dream, which sucks cause I haven't really had a good lucid dream in the past months, in fact I think my last LD was over a month ago.

I was at some area that looked like my old high school, and someone was coming to get D, J, and I. We all split up, running our separate directions. I want to say what or whoever was chasing us, was closer to me, like any other chase dream, but something happened. Suddenly I had the cape from Super Mario World.



I didn't have a single thought being captured after sprinted, and went air born. I was up in the air about fifty feet, looking down at everything. Slowly I glided back down to the ground, and decided to try it again. I took a few steps and moon jumped into the air, and grabbed on to the corners of my cape. I pointed myself towards the ground, and took a nose dive at the earth. Just at the last second, I leveled out, and my cape was full wind. It threw me back up higher than I had originally started. I even thought about how different this version of flying was compared to my normal lucids, but I don't think I was lucid...I was just enjoying things. I took another nose dive at the ground, and tried to smash it, but I woke up before impact.

Tonight seems like a good night. i WILL

I’m on a train, but it’s the outside of a freight train. Either I had this dream another night, or I had it earlier this night. There were others with me on the outside, incl. (I think) Homer and Marge Simpson. We’re just powering through country in a wide, gravelled, multi-track rail path. At one point, Homer jumps off and into a bin (green recycle, and the lid closes on him). I tell Marge to do the same.
I make my way along the train to the front – the engine seemed to be at the back. I don’t remember feeling wind, or fear for that matter. As I get there, someone cries “look out” and a brace myself for another tunnel (from earlier in the dream?). Actually it’s a very small looking station, and we stop at it. I remember seeing the orange, hanging board (what for?) past the traffic lights and trying not to hit it when we stop.



As I get off the train, I fall and get entwined with a black/yellow striped pole. I don’t know where it came from or what it was for. Someone I knew helped me out of it. As I was leaving the platform, I saw an old friend cross in front of the entrance in official rail uniform. I saw another old friend and female looking down the tunnel so I veered off right. Ticket office? I may have asked where the toilet was, then went to the right passageway, maybe to the toilet. I came back and Lily (from HIMYM) was at another counter sorting out ‘papers’ for this other girl e.g. Passport, driver’s license, ID. I went somewhere and come out on the roof where she was standing, facing away from me.



She was maybe wearing a fishing hat and some form of baggy dark trousers. Over them she had some sort of green and yellow baggy short shorts and her top was possibly one of those tank tops with straps. The view looked Tuscan, or Renaissance, partly reminiscent of Dubrovnik, but with towers and such. She turned round and maybe smiled at me. Not sure when, but probably at office with Lily: There was a flash when I said something about her dancing. It was all blue and monochrome – high angle, tight cropping – she may have been wearing aviators, and she was dancing. Then cut back to the rest of the dream, whatever it was.