Recent DJ Posts

Not much from this week. a short dream about hating work again. honestly i wish my deams had more variety.

I had a bunch of short Jamie dreams most in HH. first was I was visiting voyager and the holographic doctor was telling me there is nothing he can do for Jamie's BPD. Great. second is just being in a car with jamie and I was surprised she was there. Third she is leaving a room with my co worker Victoria. They were both laughing about something. Talking about me maybe? And no not the victoria from last week where i had a dream she was my girlfriend. Jamie went after the wrong victoria haha.

I couldn't focus on my school reading so I went for an afternoon nap between 14.50-16.40 and remembered this dream.

I'm in the upper room with dad. I have my red hoodie on with the hood over my head so I can't look foreward. I sit on a bench where the music sounds actually stand. Dad is angry with me and says that I can't keep on practicing the guitar without the musical scales. He says that I should remove my hood and look him in the eyes. He is speaking as if I had done something really bad. I remove my hood and look at him. He says that he had a good time practicing base with me but that I need to fix my practice scheme.

Notes: I began practicing with a metronome again some days ago. I actually only care about the pentatonic scale and don't find motivation when I try to learn the musical modes. I know them in theory and think that's enough (Now when I dreamt about it I tested out the mixolydian scale on a backing track and found it a little bit amusing).

I am assigned a project in a class in high school or college. For the project I am assigned to make a TV show in one weekend though it doesn't have to be high quality. Everything has all the hallmarks of very ammeter filmmaking. I pick out a few classmates. One is this korean girl, another looks like Jak and another is this elderly woman with one eye sticking out who looks like an old witch or shaman. (She actually looked like a character from a recent chapter of my book.) We get to talking and decide we decide to make a cop show, and I'm going to be a filmer/cameraman and everyone else will play characters.

Episode 1:

We get some policeman costumes, buy a box of doughnuts and ask actual police officers to film outside the station. Idr what happened here but Jak and another boy who had joined the project were sitting outside eating doughnuts and talking about a recent crime. The scene ended on a dick joke.

Episode 2:

The Korean girl is filming a scene where she is a private investigator hacking a companies' computers for signs of corruption. This was her scene idea and its super tropey (black hoodie, dark room, eating cheetos, like five monitors and her saying "I'm in" after typing on a keyboard super fast for like thirty seconds.). We spent a lot of time getting things set up the way she wanted it.

Episode 3:

Some kind of murder mystery and me (who was normally the director/filmer) got to guest star as the filmer. We filmed on my phone which we taped to the ceiling and applied a filter to make it look like security camera and Jak wearing a robber mask shot me with a nerf gun. Then cut to the old witch woman wearing a sherlock holmes outfit looking at me pretending to know forensics and me laying on the floor in a puddle of ketchup. (IIRC she just looked old but was actually a teenager)

Episode 4:

We went from a cop show to a cooking show. I was in the classroom where the dream started but it was now a kitchen, washing a big silver bowl and talking about what food I was going to make.

...

Someone found one of my old sketchbooks. They proceeded to publish all of the worst/most awkward or embarrassing things out of it online and make a detailed wiki more or less with the intention of slander. (Though they were supposedly some kind of semi legitimate media outlet they were clearly doing it just for story.) They constructed a detailed report about my characters and stories obviously cherrypicking specific scenes and lines of dialogue out of context in an effort to make me appear racist and bigoted. I remember seeing a drawing I made of myself as a cowboy shooting someone (that I actually made IRL, in like the 5th grade) and him saying that because of that drawing I was a school shooter. Then another drawing of dream characters where the article went on to say I was bad at drawing faces and had psychological problems because I associated with dream character. (This drawing was not one I made irl)

I then ended up running into the head writer in a wal-mart parking lot at night and asked him why he did it. I told him if he didn't write an article telling the truth and admitting that he just did it for story, and post it on his website with a video of him and his writers apologizing that I would try and sue. He just laughed at me so I went to wal-mart and bought a sledgehammer and took it to his yellow Bentley. When he came back with his friends started crying saying it was a gift from his father who died. Obviously I didn't care cause the guy was an asshole.

...

I was in the basement of my old house playing video games with a friend (IDR which friend if it was an IRL one or an OTD one). He was playing halo and got attacked by a xenomoprh came out and jump scared him then killed him in game. Then it broke through the glass of the TV and came out in real life, and started eating him. I wasn't particularly scared in spite of it being a gory scene but I still ran upstairs and tried to get outside. I ran past my father who was confused and seeing him caused me to become lucid.

I was still running and a quick glance over my shoulder showed me the xeno coming out the door and it had killed my father. Now lucid, I saw a useless construction in the middle of the yard. It was like a big ramp and set of walls made out of random scrap plywood and 2x4s and stuff. I affirmed that when I got around it there would be something to help me fight back. When I did I found it was an open suit of power armor and a railgun rifle. (It looked just like one I currently have in my WIP drawing folder) I got inside and all the panels closed sealing me in. I could still see normally but I had a HUD now with a radar and health bar like you do in Halo. Movement felt slightly sluggish but very strong.

The Xenomorph caught up with me and tried to kill me by vomiting dark green acid on me. The HUD gave me a warning saying not to exit due to chemical hazard but said that the armor was made of nonreactive metal and acid resistant and the threat level was "low". The xenomorph tried to stab me with a scythe appendage but it just deflected off the armor; though it pushed me back some. I punched it back, which seemed to crack parts of its exoskeleton and hurt it pretty badly, causing it to bleed more acid. I then managed to grab hold of its tounge thingy (the little inside mouth thingy xenomorphs have) and pull it out. As the monster recoiled I picked up the railgun rifle and pulled the trigger.

Nobody told me that thing was fully automatic with a machinegun-like rate of fire. One short burst and shots rang out on streaks of plasma with very noticeable recoil that I could feel right through the armor. The volley turned the alien to a puddle of green goo and black chunks and well as flattening the neighbor's house and four or fire cars completely.

Big dreaming night, and pretty good sleep. No extended insomnia.

Got very tipsy, two large-ish glasses of wine.
Ate fresh apple cake, two ice creams, bowl of chips.
Had a happy attitude all evening.
Watched videos before bed.
Read a little bit before bed.
bedtime ~23:30

Taking a more relaxed attitude is everything.

earlier:

+ floating in ocean, attacked by giant whale shark fish like thing, roll around to avoid its mouth getting eaten, it swims off eventually

+ guard at the doorway, I present my key to prove my right to be here, enter apt. see son S1? guard follows, the apartment has colorful but peeling walls, I'm a bit ashamed of the apartment

later:

+ attending some big conference, (outside, preparing to go in)

+ playing wilderness golf?

+ car broken into and emptied. (after a meeting?) I go out to my car parked on the street. It's in the middle of an intersection? The blue ford fiesta? I see that it has been broken into, and completely stripped. It looks like there is nothing left inside. I am panicked and upset, I walk around the car looking for anything, but it's completely stripped. Even my registration is gone, totally empty. Even the jack has been stolen. Looking more, I see there is a door pocket/panel opened on the left side passenger door with some stuff left inside it, I wonder why they didn't take it. There's a police patrol car right next to me, and I'm blocking them and they're trying to get by, I stop them and tell them my car's been broken into.

+ scooter turned donkey ride! [very vivid, feelings of acceleration and gravity!]
The best/most vivid dream of the night is probably the scooter-donkey ride. I was very closely inspecting [inspecting objects, thinking about them and how they work, especially with a close up view, is a sure DREAM SIGN for me. Very often this is door knob/gate locking mechanisms, and sink faucets] "my" scooter. I very clearly saw the gas in the trasparent gas tank sloshing around, interestingly, it seemed to be getting *fuller* rather than leaking out. I looked around back and found that it was leaking, and so I manipulated some things to close the container to stop the leak. I move around to the back of the scooter and inspect the various components that are hanging by their wires attached to the main corpus of the scooter. I line up one on the right hand side and attach it, using guide arrows, and do the same for another component, but on the left side of the scooter. Now a circular grey-scale display lights up with a control and gague system for the scooter and I start touching things to configure it. (There is some woman nearby who comments on something? Forgot...). My attention moves to the handlebars, and the left handlebar front brake control, which seems non-functional. It seems not attached to anything and just flapping there, I try manipulating it buy I get the sense it's not attached to anything. I look down to the front wheel as I'm doing this. I wonder about the maximum speed of this scooter, and the figure 35 MPH pops into my head. I imagine riding it and pushing on the handles to turn (like on a motorcycle, push left to go left, push right to go right). I mount the scooter, which now inexplicably has transformed into a small donkey! There is still a central circular display/handle and I now hold on to this and we take off. It is outside in daylight on a hilly country road setting with no trees. I "turn" the donkey to a side road that heads upwards, fairly rough gravelly/rocky terrain, and wonder if this thing has the strength to go long with me on it, and how well it will go uphill. The response is that it energetically sprints up the hill, very quickly, and *accelerates*! I feel the gravity and the acceleration as I strengthen my grip to hold on! We lurch forwards up the hill, turning towards the right. Now it seems that we are in some multi-townhouse division with a paved roadway/driveway, still hilly, still heading uphill. There are two men working in the road ahead, and I'm somewhat concerned about encountering them. As I pass them they do not seem threatening but are amused at my passage. Then something about turning downhill and giving a little girl a flower, but that is less clear.

+ walking through office with g/f L, we're in the printer room, there are large printer/copier devices there, they have colorful declas on the side, we kiss briefly in printer room, look at oddly colored and logoed printer/copiers, walk to cube, lots of people in close space close cubes, drinks cooler on ice on desk full of bottles of cold beverages, many of them motel-sized small drink bottles, many of them alcoholic, the manager there warns that some of those are very potent, I enter my cube, there's a team of young IT guys dismantaling routers there, wires are everywhere, they're asking me questions

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening astral projection

I am in VFX, the nearest city, heading to the bus station to get a bus home, but the street is packed with people. It's some holiday and everyone is celebrating. Then I realize I am not wearing a mask and have been walking through all these people who are also maskless. I look deep inside my bag and find a mask I carry for emergencies. The buses are not coming and people are angry. Then a group of people at the end of the line for the bus, spots a bus stopping a few hundred meters before, to avoid the crowd and they start running to get to it firs. I join them. Then a meteorite crosses the sky. We hear something on the news about incoming meteorites worldwide. When I finally get to my mom's home, another one of those meteorites flies by her building. I go to the window to check it out and realize it is not a meteorite but a spherical UFO. It comes to check our windows. I tell mom to stay still but the UFO somehow enters the room without breaking the window and analyzes us. Mom panics and collapses. The UFO is a type of intelligent drone and asks us to cooperate or else. Then forces us to have a math lesson with a hologram teacher, who for some reason is Cristina, a Portuguese tv host. She asks me to solve a math problem but I struggle with it, because she wrote it on a screen and immediately deleted it, plus they give a gadget that is some kind f calculator and I don't know how to operate it. They get upset. Meanwhile my dad comes in, doesn't realize there is an alien drone projecting an hologram, thinks the lady is real and starts flirting with her. I feel so embarrassed that I ask the alien drone to please forgive him and it actually becomes more friendly.

Spending some time at some place like a kindergarten. I am friends with the teacher and I am replacing or helping her. RAP has a kid going there and at the end of the day comes to get him. We meet and we get very friendly, we goof around a lot. I think he likes me. Then his wife also comes by and he introduces me to her with too much enthusiasm and with his hand around my waist. I feel awkward and she clearly is very upset. She is gorgeous, but I get the vibe he has way more fun with me. Some woman complains the next day that her kids didn't do homework or something and that it was our fault.

I am sleeping over at some Japanese friends' house. When I arrive he serves me tea. Hands me a strange package with detachable packets, each one with a different infusion. I just want to drink some hot beverage, but he claims it is important that I read the texts printed on each packet and choose the one I want accordingly, no matter if it's in the middle or end of it. I say I don't care, just detach the first one and he insists the choice is part of the experience and we end up debating the virtues of caring or not for that and I no longer care about the tea. I then spot on his tv some anime show that looks familiar. I see that it is written by a polish guy I know from the Sangha. I love it and then realize it is very similar to the story I have been wanting to finish for a graphic novel.

I am back in VFX with Riverstone and the town looks totally different. The street layout is changed, one of the main roads is now pedestrian friendly and it has now lots of tourist shops selling historic artifacts and ethnic crafts. I find my dad at an Indian shop arguing with the seller that some amethyst necklace is actually made of turquoise. I try to reason with him that the Indian guy is right but he insists we are wrong. I accidentally damage a bag some with ink I had in my hand and try to hide it, but then my dad knocks down a bottle of perfume and breaks so all attentions go to him.

I think I have a moment of astral projection. Starts off as a false awakening in my bed, it's dark in my room, I feel my cats cozied up in bed with me, but at the same time I realize I am not quite in my body and I am seeing through my closed eyelids. Then I hear a strange "ting ting" noise approaching and recognize it as my grandpa's walker coming towards my room and stopping by the side of my bed. I don't see him, but I do feel very clearly a presence and a darker shadow where the sound just stopped. My grandpa died a couple of days ago, so I realize I am being visited by a ghost. First I feel scared but then force myself to calm down, after all it is just grandpa checking on me before possibly departing to elsewhere. Just like he would do when he was alive, he would walk by silently and look casually without saying a word before moving on.

At some area with apartments, shops and gym. I just had an ice cream at a food truck and some guys that know me and some who don't, just exchanged some comments and catcalled me. I am a gorgeous woman, with the looks of the likes of Sofia Vergara, but I am also a detective or police agent in my pant suit trying to be respected for who I am. The sun is setting as I walk across a courtyard leading to a long staircase down to a car park. From the top of the stairs I see the shadow of someone stabbing another person at the car park. I am unarmed and my instinct is to go back and see if nobody else is coming and call for backup. I enter a gym that is just right next to me and warn some women there of what just happened so they take cover and hide. I also call the police and they say they already had been warned because there are more bodies and the killer is on a spree. When they arrive, they take me to where there is a line of bodies left by the killer on a street nearby and they evacuate everybody in the danger zone to a safer place. The manhunt starts. I find a suspicious black woman hiding in a tight corner of an alley holding a knife. I tell her to stand down but she won't and tries to attack me. I remove her knife but she has more knives and keeps reaching out to it. I manage to remove all knives and immobilize her and other agents come to take her. She claims she is only hiding from the killer and has the right to defend herself because I could be the killer. I grant her the benefit of the doubt and I say that I believe her and I apologize if we are being unfair but she still needs to be interrogated because she was acting suspicious and had some 5 knives on her.
The officers then tell me they have found the suspect, a male, and he is cornered on the top floor of a building with a kid hostage. We all go there but only I go inside the room to negotiate. He has a knife pointed to the kids throat but I get close enough to throw a small knife to his head. Doesn't kill him but hurts him enough so he drops the kid. The kid is taken by other officers. The killer takes the knife out of his skull and grabs more knives. We fight, he cuts me a bit, but in the end I make a choke hold with my legs around his neck, disarm him and flip back throwing him unconscious. I am exhausted and hurt. All my colleagues are in state of shock and awe and unable to say anything. I feel sad and lonely as I pass them going down the stairs.

I'm talking with Diego. He says that he doesn't have any parents.

Notes: I helped Diego with some math yesterday. I read "To Kill a Mockingbird", and just read about Dill who doesn't have a dad.

Fragment I'm in some kind of game with lava. I need to get some kind equipment in order to pass the lava.

Notes: My brother talked about about a game he plays where he needs some new equipment in order to proceed.

I'm cooking Hasselback potatoes in the kitchen. Andreas E is constantly calling me just to ask me how I am. I tell him I am okey with a short reply all the times. New fragment. I'm in my room with a hose. I am shooting water in my room and try to put my thumb by the mouth of the hose in order to get a more spread out water beam. I don't succeed. My mom calls to me that everyone has to help in the new potato land.

Notes: I read about potatoes yesterday. Andreas has been writing sometimes. I think Andreas has the role of Martin more in the dream because he constantly asks me how I am.

I woke up 05.19 and wrote down the past dreams then. I tried to WILD and have my breath as focusing point but fell asleep.

I'm driving our car up to our street from Albin's house. There is a stranger next to me in the car. He says that I am driving wrong but I think I'm doing it right. He keeps on telling me that I do wrong. I succeed in parking by our house.

I'm in some kind of game where we jump on big rocks and Bowser is there. My brother is also there. I realize it's a dream and fly away. I fly to my house and there are my cousins. I have almost perfect lucidity and it feels as though I have all my IRL memories. I remember that I want to eat something good. I go to the kitchen and find Peter there. I ask him if there is anything I can eat. He takes the frying pan and show me some kind of bean mess that looks disgusting. Peter takes his hand in the food and shoves it around which makes it look even less appetizing. I don't want to eat it anymore and fly outside. Morgan and mom are there. I fly up to the tree which doesn't have any leaves in the dream. I fly around it and I feel such blissfulness. I fly in many different positions that makes me really happy. I fly on my back, stomach, I stand on my feet and fly upwards with my feet pointing up to the sky. That was really trippy. This dream has such good stabiliy and everything feels really real I think to myself. I try to fly as high as I can and above the atmosphere. Unfortunately I can't go higher than about 15 meters above the ground. There is like a soft ceiling that I can't break through. I ask the people on the ground if they want to join me. Some people start to fly modestly and carefully. I fly to the city where the dream starts to fade away.

Notes: The flying was so easy and it made me feel amazing.

I am in city with my friends from school. There is a big glass cage where some people stand. I become more and more lucid. I start to fly in the glass cage and look at the people. I grab two of my friends' hands and try to fly away with them. It is difficult to fly with the extra weight but I manage okey. We walk to Saltö and Gabriel talks about some kind of karate. I look at Signe and she looks different from IRL.

Edit:

Remembered some more dreams during my morning routines.

I'm sitting on a bench in school with the school's guitar. Eni comes through the entrance with his own guitar equipment and someone behind him also has some music instruments. I tell Eni that he finally brought his own things to school. He laughs and says something about how it was time. I'm happy when I think about what we are going to play.

Notes: I thought about how me and Eni probably isn't going to play with each other anymore some days ago.

I'm looking at my face in some mirror and see that my right eyebrow is cut in half and that the right side of the right eyebrow is just a circle with hair on it.