Recent DJ Posts

Talking about my health
It's night, and I'm laying in bed. Someone whom I don't remember is laying in a bed somewhere in the room. We're sending each other messages in the form of newspapers we write with magic, possibly with a wand.

We tell each other about our health, apparently. Towards the end he says something along the lines of "You shouldn't complain so much" and that makes me mad, so I just go to sleep, possibly after a remark from my side.
-
I transiently wake up, and, after a minute, I go back to sleep.
-

Harry Potter-ish lucid
I am around the street where I live. I see teenagers, behaving somewhat like Ron and Hermione, and I go to them. Suddenly we're in a sort of organization, and we walk behind a house, where we're hidden, and we practice magical spells. I say that I'd especially like to practice forbidden spells (I seem to refer to forbidden in Hogwarts), which the characters behaving like Ron and Hermione seem to like.

Small scene change, I'm now walking away from that practice area with the characters I'll just call Ron and Hermione now, for convenience. I spontaneously become lucid. I think for a moment of what to do, and I decide to grow dragon wings since I've always wanted to experience flight. I tell them to watch what I can do, and I try to grow the wings, focusing. But it doesn't work, so I just remark: "Hm, doesn't work..."

Scene change. Semi-lucid now. We're in a classroom, apparently in Hogwarts. There's an old, grumpy-looking woman who's the teacher. I'm sitting next to Ron. He says we're getting tests now, and as he says that, the teacher puts a piece of paper on each of our sides of the desk. Still semi-lucid, I decide to do the test.

When she gave everyone a test, she says we should start, and I take out a pen. Now lucidity is gone. I talk for a while with Ron, not noticing I should work on the test. As the teacher walks by, I quickly take my test and try to look as if I'm working, and the teacher seems to simply ignore the fact that my test is empty, despite having had 5 minutes of time to work on it. I try to work on the first task, which is to rearrange a given set of letters magically into a specified sentence. I try to think really hard and see if I can remember the spell, but I don't, so I reluctantly put my hand up to ask the teacher. She comes over to me, and I tell her I don't remember the spell. She simply says that one surely wouldn't need more than a pen to finish this test, in a sort of humiliating way. I don't really care that she tried to humiliate me, but more about the fact that it seems pretty incompetent that she doesn't even know her own test. So, I just look around the class, and I spot a boy constantly farting, and the boy behind him clearly not enjoying that, putting his head down on his desk in anguish.

---

That second dream was nice, just a spontaneous DILD. Just annoying my dream control didn't work, and that I forgot about stabilization and increasing lucidity.

The farting boy clearly represented my totally mature classmates in real life, although the boy was a bit closer to the age where one would usually be expected to do something as immature as that.

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #2??: Rocket-Powered Flight

I’m standing at the corner where two long, endless hallways meet in an elbow bend. I’m trying to demonstrate to an audience how to rearchitect it, so I “select” part of the hallway as if this were all taking place inside of a 3D computer graphics program like Blender or 3DS Max. It lights up bright green. I want to shorten it, so I “select all” and the entire length of one hallway now glows bright green as far as I can see.

I take a moment to appreciate this power, and as I consider what I’m doing, I realize that I’m dreaming! The dream starts to fade on me, but I’m determined not to lose it. I vigorously rub my hands together and start belting out a song: “I’m not going to lose this dreeeeeam!” I sing a few more lines about lucidity, and in one line declare (with no real supporting evidence) that Dreamer is also here.

Suddenly I emerge outside in a brightly-colored world that has the look and color scheme of a classic video game from the Nintendo 8-bit era. I’m on a large, green plane that I think is supposed to be an abstract representation of grass. Nearby there’s a small pond filled with realistic-looking water, and a fair number of brightly-colored but mostly realistic DCs wander nearby.

There’s an old-fashioned looking stereo nearby that seems to be producing the game world’s music, which is a pleasant, catchy chiptune soundtrack. On the side of the stereo in black letters, I see “????? Sound System”. (Can’t remember the name!) I think about how I’ll definitely want to remember this name when I wake up.

I feel pressure in my stomach and absentmindedly push out a big fart. Rather than a brief event, though, the gas continues in a loud, embarrassing, seemingly unstoppable stream. I figure that since this is a dream, it may just go on forever (which it seems to be doing.) I get a sour look from one DC, a man with a dark mustache, who glares at me and walks away.

I suddenly recall that I received a lucid dare to engage in fart-powered flight (seriously!), so I decide that now is pretty much the perfect time to try. I think of myself being propelled upward and I blast easily up into the air! It’s some of the most effortless flying I’ve ever done. I wonder whether I should just fly like this all the time.

I soar happily back and forth through the sky, my “rocket propulsion” continuing all the while. Suddenly, Dreamer streaks quickly past me, flying in the same gas-powered manner that I am! I see and hear her “hee-hee-hee!”ing as she shoots by and I start laughing too, enjoying the hilarity and immaturity of this dream.

I fly up to a large tree, easily a couple of hundred feet tall. I shoot quickly to the top and land on one of the branches, seeing a sloping wooden hallway that leads into the interior of the tree. I walk into it, curious about what this tree is and where it leads. I hear a snatch of conversation, PercyLucid saying something about wanting to trade lucid dares with me and some other people “for a few hours” so he can do some of ours. Very shortly after this, the dream ends.

Dream - Lucid

I was doing laundry at the house I grew up in, but the washing machine was in the middle of a room. I just needed to wash a pair of blue jeans and two other things. The two other things were white. I wanted to use bleach for some reason. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do. A middle-aged lady then came up to me and showed me what to do. The wash cycle started. I hoped that my pants wouldn't get bleached out. I pictured them being completely bleached out.

Then I was somewhere else, like an airport or a shopping mall, not sure which. I was sitting down somewhere at a high-top table, and this kid, a boy of about 9 or 10, came up to me and tried to plug something into my iPod. I took it away before he could. Wow, what a rude kid! Soon after, I discovered he was doing this to everyone. He was also telling some people he needed to charge his phone or iPod or something and that's why he needed to do it. In reality, he was trying to steal music and files off of people's devices. His mom was the middle-aged woman, and she had told him to do it. It was some kind of scheme.

Then, I was at home with Dallas, though the apartment looked way different. I saw that there were some kittens there. What?? How did those get there? They were tiny and adorable, as kittens tend to be. I bent down to pet them, asking Dallas where they came from. I don't remember his response. They all looked different. I named off all the different types there were. The only one I remember is the last one, though, which was a Russian Blue-looking cat.

The kittens also had cages. I saw them stacked in the bathroom. I think there were some in some of the cages as well. I then saw my cat, Belle, who hates everyone and everything (except me ). The mother cat, a fluffy, grayish cat, came up to Belle. I thought for sure they would fight, but Belle seemed to like her.

I then saw Dallas trying to give the kittens to the lady from before. He had some kittens in his hand that he was trying to pass over to her. Apparently, the kittens were hers and they had gotten away from her. I came up to them and held back Dallas's hand from giving her the kittens.
"No, you can't have them," I said, "I know what you were doing, you were trying to steal."
She seemed taken aback, but I did not let her have those kittens. Who knows what she was trying to scheme with them, poor little babies.

I then had all the kittens in the bathroom together. They were laying down in two lines. I counted them in twos. I came up with 12, but realized I missed two and got 14. 14 kittens! I was very surprised, since they were all from the same litter. That is a lot of kittens to be born to one cat at one time! I also had no idea how we were going to take care of these kittens. We were going to give them away anyway, but until then, I had no clue. I remember, at some point, making sure they had food and water. I saw the kibbles in a food dish, and the water in a white water bowl like the one I use IWL for my cat. I was using the food I give to Belle, my grown cat, because it's what we had. I said something to Dallas about how we needed to get kitten food.

Then, something about work, but it was at Kohl's. Then something about this video game-type thing where you were in some virtual reality world where your face was projected onto this weird robotic-looking, floating body. It was something that I had to do. I was there with many others, and we were at a long conference table for some meeting. My brother was there too, and so was the lady. I hoped the lady didn't see me. I floated to the other side of the table.

Then, I was talking to my friend Caitlin. She was telling me how her review went with our high school band director. She had gotten a 19 cent raise. We were in school still apparently, but were getting paid to be. It's hard to explain; it was weird. I pictured her in the office with him as he read off her review that determined how much of a raise she got. There was one thing that she said she got a lower score on. It was something about attending LSU, which she had no interest in doing so had made no effort to. She still got a "+5" out of a possible 15, so it didn't affect her too bad. I saw the +5 written in a blank spot to the left of the LSU question. I also saw her raise at the bottom of the page; she was now making $9 and some change. I was seeing it from the band director's POV.

~

I was walking home. I was walking downtown when it started to rain. It was slow at first. I could feel the drops very vividly. It then started to get steadier and a bit heavier. I was crossing the street.

Then, all the sudden I was home, though it didn't resemble our apartment at all. Dallas was laying on the couch. I noticed that we didn't have as many kittens. I said
"Dallas, did you give those kittens back to Blake and Sarah (my brother and his fiance')?" He didn't answer, so I knew he did. I was also referring to a different set of kittens; we still had the ones from the lady. I continued.
"Why???" I asked. Again, no answer. He was getting up from the couch.

~

I was at a gay dance club. I went in and bought a ticket at a ticket booth to go to the dance floor. It was still quite early, so no one was dancing yet. I went through the doorway beside the ticket booth anyway. This is what I always did when I went; I always got there early and was always the first to be on the dance floor. The lights were still on on the big dance floor. There was a stage in the front as well where the DJ was. I don't remember if there was music or not.

I then was going to leave for the night, just as it was starting to get busy. I walked out to where the booth was. I was now standing beside the booth, and felt the need to fart. I meant to keep it quiet, but it was super loud and gross. No one laughed, but a lady in the ticket booth asked if I was alright.
"I hope so," I replied.
I then went into the bathroom and into a stall. I don't think there was a door on the stall.

I then was at home in the bonus room, but it was at the house I grew up in. It was quite late at night, probably about 4am. Dallas was there and was still awake. He was on the computer. I saw a kitten run by that looked just like my cat, Belle. I pet her as she ran by. I thought about how she had Belle's personality. I then saw another cat that was slightly bigger, but also looked just like Belle. At first I thought it was her, but I saw her next to the cat that had just run by me and saw that they were relatively the same size, but, like I said, the other one was just a tad bigger. I pet that one too. That one also reminded me of Belle.

My phone then rang. I saw on the caller ID that it was Brittany, a butch lesbian that I hung out with at the club a lot (I don't know this person IWL). I was hesitant to answer, but picked up and started to talk to her. We talked for a bit, and then I had her talk to Dallas while I got ready for bed. I did some other things as well. I had hoped that maybe she would have hung up by now, but she hadn't, and Dallas gave the phone back to me. We talked a little bit more. I tried to steer the conversation to an end, but she kept talking. I really needed to get some sleep...

I then was in my room at the house I grew up in. I was standing by a chest of drawers with a TV on top of it. My bed was across from it, against the wall that it was against when I was in elementary/middle school. It was morning now, about 7am, and I still hadn't gone to bed. Laying in my bed who also hadn't slept yet was Brittany. I felt a little uncomfortable about sleeping next to her, especially since I was married, but I didn't think she'd try anything. I was talking to her about how tired I was going to be at work. She then said
"Crap."
"What?" I said.
"I left my thumb drive." She had left it at the club.
I don't remember my response. I doubted that it was still there unless someone had turned it in, but I think she doubted that as well.

I still hadn't gotten into bed. I was stalling. I thought about me sleeping next to her. I'm sure it would be fine, but I was still uncomfortable.

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #231: Fedoras and Flatulence

I wake up feeling disappointed that I didn’t manage to have a lucid dream. Well, too late for that -- Wife and the kids are up and getting ready and my folks are here too. I feel grumpy and sorry for myself, but I get started with the day. Lots of mundane stuff happens and eventually we all wind up sitting at a cafeteria table across from a pedestal.

The pedestal fascinates me. It has the vague outline of a statue on it, which will fade from looking fully physical to almost completely invisible. It’s a statue of Artemis, and I know that nobody can see it but me because I’m the only lucid dreamer in this whole place. As I’m staring at this statue, a brown-haired woman in her early 20s sits down in the chair next to me, a little closer than appropriate. She touches me on the shoulder flirtatiously and leans in. “Hi! What are we looking at?”

I feel uneasy about how close she’s getting but also attracted and flattered. I feel like I don’t know how much information I should reveal about being a lucid dreamer, so my answer is guarded: “That’s supposed to be a statue there.”

“Well, what do you see?” she asks.

The truth: “It’s a statue of Artemis. I can see it because I’m a lucid dreamer.”

“That’s amazing!” she says. She makes a few more comments about lucid dreaming and then stands up. Her inner thigh brushes my left hand as she gets up and I again get that mix of attraction and discomfort. She smiles. “You should call me if you ever want to talk to me about it.”

I think that I’d have no way to call her because I don’t have her phone number. I’m about to ask her what it is but stop when I realize how bad that would sound. This all feels strange to me now. I look to my right and my family isn’t here with me. It’s just me. I take the nose pinch reality check and I blow right through, becoming semi-lucid but just not completely convinced. .This feels so real, am I sure? I hit a second nose pinch and now I’m fully lucid.

I get up from the table and move into an adjacent room, remembering my intent to summon Dreamer. My go-to method has been transforming an existing DC into her, so I look around at the few dream characters wandering this scene and confidently grab the nearest one. It’s a short, pudgy Asian male, overall a really abysmal candidate for this transform into Dreamer. I want to be confident though so I go right ahead with trying to transform this dude.

I press my hands along his scalp, spreading Dreamer’s purple hair color along his scalp. He’s smiling and kind of chuckling at this, seeming to find it funny. The purple is coming out but whatever paint is coming out of my hands feels really clump and uneven. The guy’s scalp is kind of sweaty, too, and the purple paint even starts running down his face. His hair isn’t even half purpled before I get frustrated after a long time trying. Okay, maybe he looks too different, try changing the face. I start mashing on his face with my hands, trying to change his look into Dreamer. He seems to be getting kind of pissed at me for this and the whole thing just becomes awkward.

Okay, move on. I leave and walk into another room with a strange, gently wavy floor. I try the behind-the-back summon, narrating that “I feel Dreamer’s hand over here,” but I feel this doubt like I’m not doing things properly. I call out “[Dreamer]!” (using her real name) and vaguely hear a response, and I decide that she must be up ahead in some nearby room. I decide to use my old trick of demanding that the dream show me the way, and now when I call for Dreamer, a doorway glows with bright yellow light.

I continue moving through another series of 3-4 doors this way, demanding to be shown the way and the dream complying. I wind up in a large, cavernous room filled with DCs. There is a group of nuns near one side of the room that are dressed in unusual red habits. A large number of adults wander the room (more women than men) and close to the center of the room there’s a shallow pit where a large group of children are playing together. I ask the dream to show me where Dreamer is, but the glow effect always seems to be slightly out of view, frustrating me. I demand out loud that “Everybody point to where [Dreamer] is in this room.”

Every character in the scene turns toward a young, blond girl that’s playing in the pit. She’s about 6, her hair much shorter and lighter than I would have imagined, but I feel like this is her. I walk up to the child, who looks up at me with a goofy, slightly crooked-toothed smile. I place my hands on the sides of her head and say, “This is you, you’re [Dreamer].” As I say this, she grows to full height and now she looks completely like herself, apart from the fact that she has the little girl’s short, blond hair.

“Thank you for finding me!” she says. Dreamer puts her arms around my neck and we briefly hug. Almost immediately, all of the DCs in the room move toward, all of them smiling at her, greeting her, and wanting to interact with her. Some of them congratulate her. I stand by a few feet to the side, interested and amused. As each of the DCs greet her in turn, at one point a man comes up with a tiny fedora and placed it onto her head as if he’s crowning her.

The happy throng of DCs congregate around Dreamer as they all walk toward one of the room’s exits. I feel sad to see her leave the dream scene so early but all of this feels very natural to me, so I don’t resist it.

Once I find myself alone, I walk through another exit into an office scene with lots of people working at desks. It looks like we’re high up in a skyscraper. I make some mischief in here with telekinesis, throwing a plastic sign, tossing a desk, picking up one poor guy who’s just trying to get his work done. The office workers start seeming uncomfortable with my presence, so I look for an exit.

Off to the side is a platform with a waiting helicopter, so I climb aboard. Another DC tries to get on with us, and there’s a brief argument about who should get to come aboard. The pilot says (referring to me) “He can do whatever he wants,” and we take off. We fly over the city for a good while and I spy a few buildings that look reminiscent from spots in Breaking Bad. Eventually the helicopter hovers over a forest clearing near a building and I jump out. The helicopter flies off and I’m alone again.

I remember that I have a lucid dare from Dreamer that requires me to perform a Super Advanced Fart (one which is “very long, loud, and powerful”). At first I feel like this will be impossible. My body isn’t giving me “the signal” that anything can be conjured up. I know that this is a dream, though, so I convince myself that a bubble of pressure is forming in my stomach. Once that’s there, a good push sends me into a full eruption. The emerging fart is ultra loud and super powerful, lifting me gently into the air. It feels like there’s a hand or a platform under my butt lifting me upward. I wobble around unsteadily in the air, leaning left and right and bobbing a bit. It feels like I have a jet pack on.

I’d hoped to have enough propulsion to reach lower earth orbit, but I never get more than 15-20 feet off the ground. As the “event” ends, I settle back down to the ground. Dare achieved!

I’ve still got some dream left, so I decide to find Dreamer again. I ask the dream to show me where she is, and a door glows on a nearby building. I head for the door but before I reach it, I have a false awakening at the foot of a bed. Wife is lying on the bed, completely unclothed, writing on a notepad. I feel extreme sexual attraction and I curl up next to her. The moment that I kiss her neck, though, her clothes reappear. Then she shows me that she’s making a list of personality quirks that makes her good at Jeopardy questions. I’m still trying to figure out how to turn things frisky when my dad walks by on the way to the kitchen. The mood is officially ruined, so I get up for the day before waking up for real.

Dream 1:
I'm at Germain's house in his backyard. Lachlan and I are talking about something. We're standing near a car which is I'm the backyard and he asks if I'm able to drive. I say yes. I can now see Lachlan's wife and I'm talking to her.

Dream 2:
It's night and I'm at what looks like Marinda milkbar, but is a petrol station.
A man is filling up his car and let's it fill automatically, as he walks away. While his cars unattended, a guy that I'm with decides to steal his petrol and siphon it into our car. I help the man siphon and feel a bit nervous as the man may come back at anytime. As the fuel stops, we quickly pack up the equipment we're siphoning with.

I'm now at my house and standing in the kitchen. Dad walks into kitchen and he's talking about the person who is trying to break into the house. He keeps insisting that he won't get in. I feel a little uneasy with the idea of just letting a person try and break into your house while you're home. We can hear rattling sounds coming from the door. After half a minuet or so it stops and Dad walks back to the kitchen with a couple brochures that was left at the door. I kind of have a sigh of relief come over me as it was probably not someone trying to break into our house. One of the brochures was to do with a religion. Maybe jehovah's witnesses?

An older lady is in the kitchen, she would have at least been in her 60's. I feel attracted to her. She's looking in the pantry for something to eat. I tell her that there's not a hell of a lot and will be shopping on Wednesday. She mentions about giving my mother $7 for her birthday. $1 for every year she had passed. I start to feel strong emotions of sadness as I think back to when my Mum was still alive.

We both walk over to where Dad is, he's on the computer listening to music. I show him trick or fix something that will make listening to music a lot easier for him.

Dream Fragment:
Someone walks into my room and it has a strong fart smell.

Side Notes:
Poor sleep as I was too awake. May have been from Hemi Sync.

This lucid is from the morning of 3/24/2014. Still going for Task of the Year!

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #195: Indoor Gardening

I’m working in a busy office setting with my friend “Leroy”. The very popular manager of the office has just been fired and everyone’s gathered to hear a speech from some stuffed shirt corporate guy explaining why this was done.

“Losing a beloved manager is like losing a friend,” says the generic corporate guy.

Leroy farts loudly. I laugh, then turn to him and say, “I’m not sure how many friends you’ll have if you keep doing that.” He doesn’t seem to realize I’m joking and looks hurt. Now I feel sort of bad. I assume he’s sensitive because we just lost our manager.

As the corporate guy drones on and on, I start feeling very stressed. I realize that I’m late for an orchestra concert I’m supposed to be performing in. I sneak out of the meeting, looking for the auditorium. I walk down a long, carpeted hallway and find the auditorium doors on my left. When I step inside, I see that it looks more like a movie theater. I get a sense of how odd this all is and I’m enormously relieved when I realize that I’m dreaming.

The scene rapidly begins to fade, so I rub my hands together and run back and forth across the front of the theater. It takes a moment, but after maybe 3 or 4 trips from one end of the theater to the other, the visuals all come back.

The theater is large but there are only five seats right next to each other. I recognize one of the theatergoers as my friend “SKR”, but hers is the only familiar face. SKR seems to be looking for something under her seat so I decide not to just focus on tasks rather than trying to communicate.

I start going for Jack and the Beanstalk Task of the Year. I perform a behind-the-back summon of seeds, and my hand comes back with little nuggets attached to long wisps of cotton. I just go ahead like this is good enough and start digging into the floor. The concrete floor scoops easily aside, leaving a nice, shallow hole for the seeds. I stuff them into the dirt, cover it back over, and start looking for my beanstalk to grow.

The shoots start emerging, but when they get to be about 4-5 inches long, they flop over onto their side on the floor. I tug at them a bit but they just feel like limp, frayed green carpet. I give them a tug and try to imagine them shooting skyward, but I’m not able to get tons of energy behind this thought.

Now I see Wife walking in through the doors of the theater. There’s a sensation that’s sort of like waking up and then I find myself in my in-laws’ house. I “realize” that all of what I just experienced took place inside Unreal Engine 4 and I’ve now returned to the real world.

Wife gives me a stern look. “Do you have anything you should be telling me?”

I sheepishly admit that I skipped out on playing in my orchestra concert so that I could have a lucid dream. She gives a serious nod and walks away. I’m glad she’s not too pissed off about this. The dream ends...

My hubby was holding me and he had his hand on my arse and I farted on him, Ohh my god I was sooooo embarassed lmao

non-dream - non-lucid - lucid

17/11/10 I decided to go back to bed anyways and managed to sneak in another lucid. Albeit an extremely non-productive and boring one. I was in some sort of public institution and my intuition told me it was educational, like a university or high school and I was lucid pretty much from the word go (I was sleeping very lightly at all times and the build-up of the dream reminded me, sans the conscious awareness prior to the dream, of a WILD experience in the beginning, the way the scene went from randomly organised images gradually towards an integrated scene with plot.)

A few friends and I were heading down the hall towards a concert. I didn't really feel like I had the energy to start taking full control of the dream and I feared I would wake up if I attempted it so I only made minor adjustments, like jumping from table to table a bit long. I even did try flying but had no success, although I did manage to at one point follow along running on the walls of the lower level of the tunnel. It wasn't gravity alteration it was more me keeping a telekinetic pressure towards the ground to keep me in position. I sort of just decided to go with the plot and see what would happen, and as we got to the concert it turned out that it was a Nik and Jay event... groovy... or... something. In any case we took place on the high grounds and mainly sat chatting away. One of the artists came up and joined in on the laughter, which he was aware was directed at the band he was in. At a certain point in a song, which both included a slight break in the music and a rather obscene video shot of a bloody (literally!!) anus up close, I farted to the amusement of the people around me as they gradually found out that it was not an inherent aspect of the song. I didn't actually do it on purpose and to be fair I think it was my physical body doing it, which would also explain the slow realisation rate of myself and DCs in the immediate vicinity. I woke up.