Recent DJ Posts

Morning of June 15, 2018. Friday.



In my dream, I am in a mostly undefined setting of which cannot be determined to be indoors or outdoors, though it does not have the typical essence of bilocation. It seems near late morning. I am involved in adding to an ongoing model and story about a journey by sea, though the features of this model sit on the picnic table or hover in the air slightly above it when implied to be within the ocean depths. Other people seem to be present watching and listening to my narration, but I do not actually see anyone else.

The ship seems to be a schooner, sailing from left to right in my view. I talk about the dangers that might be encountered. I slowly add an unrealistic number of rocks. The model schooner is about four inches in length.

As my dream nears its end, I add more and more squid, which hover in the air (though implied to be below the ocean’s surface in this model) which are slightly bigger than the ship. A couple of them roll up (left to right) and transform into snails that continue to hover in the air in the seascape’s implied depths. I slowly become aware that I am dreaming and had been non-lucidly testing vestibular system correlation, which I have been doing more of in my dreams in the last few months. (This correlates with another recent dream with different autosymbolism based on the same dynamics, where a solid pipe became a hose, and the eardrum was represented as a hissing valve I “popped”, more related to the illusory “ears” of the dream self.)

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The majority of my dreams since early childhood have vestibular system correlation autosymbolism of several different types. (This includes flying, falling, hovering, and rising dreams, which are unrelated to waking life, despite the multitude of people who continue to propagate falsehoods about “symbolism” without understanding that dreams are autosymbolic.)

Although this could be considered an extension of the usual water induction process, there is no water present (though WLWS is implied). It additionally includes the hovering factor of vestibular system correlation as well as the visual rendering (by way of the virtuous circle effect of developing a deeper and deeper understanding of dreams and clarity of mind stemming from both lucid and non-lucid dream control).

The vestibular system correlation is represented by the transformation of squid into snail and visual analogies to the inner ear; that is, semicircular canals, vestibular nerve, and cochlea.

What little waking life relevance (always literal) is present is based on my youngest son’s friends recently to leave the region on an oceangoing yacht, where they have otherwise lived for a long time.

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Morning of March 9 2018. Friday.



My father is alive and appears as he was in the 1960s. I do not remember that he died in 1979. I am also not at all aware of my current conscious self identity. My age may be implied to be about thirty. I ride around in a car with him in late morning. The driver’s side is on the left, implying America.

There are a few repeated scenes. We mostly visit apartment buildings where gangsters supposedly live. No one is around but us until the last scene.

My father punches a wall and creates the impression of dampness and marks like small squid tentacles instead of fingers.

At one point, I watch a waterbed wiggle. A large squid apparently lives inside the mattress and the movement of the mattress’s surface is caused by this otherwise unseen squid. I am briefly, though not viably aware that I am dreaming, and I consider if this scene is autosymbolism as relating, as a precursor, to hypnopompic kicks (as did my donkey inside a mattress dream from Christmas of 2016, which crosses my mind as such very vaguely and briefly).

In the last scene, my father and I are standing in a hallway where a curtain is drawn across one area. An unfamiliar male moves the curtains aside and says my father has a doctor’s appointment.

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Water usually represents, as autosymbolism, the essence of sleep, dream state induction (in fact, my most common form of induction since early childhood, occurring at least once every sleeping period), and the absence of emotion in unconsciousness. I suspect, curiously enough (from personal evidence), at least on one level, that a squid has something to do with augmented sexuality, however, as related to dream state reinduction (as a subliminal directive) rather than waking life. The problem with pretending that dreams are symbolically about waking life is in ignoring how the fictitious non-lucid dream self (personified subconscious, which lacks temporality and intelligence) is not the conscious self and that, even when non-lucid, I typically seek the understanding of the dream state rather than waking life, to develop clarity of mind. Plus, dreams are primarily autosymbolic in symbolizing the nature of biology, vestibular system ambiguity, transitions in unconsciousness, and consciousness reascension, so how could they viably relate to waking life in the way many people seem to believe (other than when additionally prescient or as literal carryovers)?

Other than being autosymbolic of the usual RAS mediation and the emergent consciousness factor (by way of preconscious personification), the last part of my dream regarding the doctor (looking into my dream self’s essence through the curtains, which is autosymbolism for the liminal space of the waking transition) is possibly literal and reflects my occasional focus on mortality, though hopefully not literally prescient yet. From experience, I know that my father now often represents my current conscious self identity even if it is otherwise not extant in the dream state. Still, I really had to go upon waking, and as a waterbed mattress is called a “bladder”, there may be a connection, though I had a dream about a squid on a mattress in 2015, and although there were pools of water on the bed, it was not a waterbed. Incidental associations are probably enough to trigger such a dream, though, especially in punching a wall (vaguely influenced by the 1980s movie “Altered States”), with a wall representing the autosymbolic barrier between fictitious dream self identity and conscious self identity.

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Morning of June 6, 2015. Saturday.



Sometimes dreams are so surreal and unrelated to life and every facet of a person’s personality and thoughts and interests, it is a task to make any grounded reasonable associations. This is a good example. Nightmares are very rare for me and always seem linked to sleep apnea or my lifelong cardiac arrhythmia (which my father also had) though only problematic for a period in the 1980s, but this one comes close with the strange mood (though I still would not call it a true nightmare, as there was no residual negative emotion carried from it).

My recent vampire witch dream had a typical carryover (though it was atypically divided by more than one day) - being embarrassed about wearing clothes in public.

I am seated in a dark movie theater (while the unknown movie is showing) and realize that I am wearing clothes and thus become embarrassed since I “know” that you should not wear clothes in a movie theater, especially this particular one which is also a library. Even more frustrating, I seem to be wearing a clown outfit (with no back story on how this occurred) or at least a white shirt with dark pink pompom (or pompon) clown suit buttons that are about the size of a small fist.

I stealthily leave the movie theater with one hand each on the top two buttons to hide them. I get the impression that someone is laughing at my clothed body. However, I manage to suddenly find myself (as if by teleportation) in a different scene in a library checkout area - which is also somehow the same theater’s lobby - where my shirt seems to be normal though I still seem to be holding pompoms in my closed fists. However, they are moving. I place them on the counter and they are each a small cuttlefish, which writhe around (as if disoriented) a bit and then decide to mate. This in turn is my payment for an overdue fee regarding books I did not even check out, but I do not question it. (I think cuttlefish are metaphorical for human hands as with spiders, because both instantly make me visually associate human hands - in fact, my “Things From Outer Space” childhood dream seemed to feature more of a giant cuttlefish-like creature than an alien spider - though actually recognized in-dream as a “giant” hand with theatrical enhancements - this being the first time I have clearly made that connection even though other creatures, such as the octopus-man, were also ocean-related).

In another scene, I become aware of an annoying (stray?) cat, possibly a darker tortoiseshell. I am not sure who it belongs to. I eventually see that it is only a piece of a cat; the head and front part of the body (with two legs), yet almost flattened into a two-dimensional form (though still with perceivable volume). It cannot possibly be alive, but it somehow is. When I pick it up to check on its status, it makes strange meowing sounds and I consider that it may be just a residual muscle reflex and that the animal is not aware of anything. However, there is slight movement as it meows, but I decide it will probably not live very long so I put it in a cardboard box and into a commercial dumpster in an alley in a business district. I do not have the will or interest to “put it out of its misery”.

After this, I have a very uneasy awareness that the cat will exist like this forever (long after I am gone) and I feel a bit guilty over its immortality as such, as it goes (without any of its own intent) to places unknown (perhaps trapped beneath layers of debris and not able to do anything or to be a “proper” cat and enjoy its cathood). It is a haunted feeling, although the creature cannot move much or walk (and thus cannot threaten me). It is almost like being aware of a human mind being “trapped” in a particular time period or culture (or religion) for endless years.

Dream 1:

First we were at some theatre and there was a man on stage with a dragon that looked like it was made of clay and at the end of the shows it turned into a paper box kite, still in form of the dragon, but for some reason I thought it was a giant squid. Later in the dream I discovered it was real whilst walking through a plaza of Japan, but while it was in front of me, instead of a dragon it was a giant shrimp (but I still thought squid). Turns out the guy who owned the dragon/shrimp/squid was actually John Watson (Sherlock) who hated the theatre life and wanted to give up his sanity in order to die. I tried telling him not to, but he clicked a website link on a piece of paper (which was how he was giving up his sanity) and died.

Then we were on some kind of airport and heard a tiny 'clink' from a plane that was landing, apparently it crashed, but the plane was totally fine and everyone in it. There were two cars there, a YouTuber (Robbaz) who I watch took the children into his car to drive home safely and my friend from school was in the other car, waiting for me and my other friend to get in the car. Next we were driving out of Queensland which was also Hollywood, we drove past a hotel called the "Artery Hotel" which was an almost flat and tall building with an elevator in the middle and apparently I had stayed there.

Dream 2:

I was in some kind of video game, sometimes I was spectating and sometimes I was in it. A few friends of mine and I were running away from these monsters, one type looked like a shadow beast from Zelda: Twilight Princess:



except, it had a more tear dropped shielded face, only had weaves coming from the top and at the back like multiple tails, walked on all fours like a tiger and dripped some kind of goo. The second type had a seaweed like body, they usually had one, two or three and had circular heads with glowing white eyes. The third type looked like the first except it walked on two legs and was more muscular built. Soon I was spectating and Sherlock Holmes (Benedict Cumberbatch) was running from them (I watched Sherlock before I went to bed that night). He was trying to be smart about the situation but ended up cornered by them and probably died because I woke up before it happened.

Morning of June 16, 2014. Monday.



I am at our present address on W Street. Our youngest son Oliver is playing outside. I go outside into our backyard, look under our house near our wooden steps, and soon notice an “ocean” under our house at where ground-level would otherwise be. This uniquely isolated ocean feature solely under our house in this part of town has a large sea monster living within it yet somehow also lives in the “real” Pacific ocean much of the time via some sort of “portal” or unexplainable underground or underwater access point. The sea monster is a rather atypical squid-like creature with jellyfish-like features and of a pale violet color, with seemingly random truncated cylindrical legs of differing lengths. At one point, it somehow builds a brick wall in the middle of the underneath of our house (with no back story concerning where the bricks originated from), running east and west, by which I can then not visually follow it or learn what it may be up to; for example, in trying to burst up through our floor in a particular room north of the wall - which I actually expect at one point - especially on our front porch, though this never occurs. This is a rather strange setup; sort of like a hybrid of a semi-lucid dream and a (fairly rare) vertical composite of themes or symbols, with the undesirable or threatening elements being below me and probably related to supraconscious access (via the metaphorical ocean presence under our home).

Sea monsters (in a negative association, not when they are “pets”) may often represent invasive but more isolated “collective consciousness” (or again, supraconscious links) - sometimes caused by people you cannot realistically relate to - or with their invasive wrongful beliefs being a part of your day to day experiences - sort of as with the negative connotations of an invading alien (which may represent an annoying relative or associate - even someone you have not meant). As I have documented in my past, dream characters are often not an extension or direct “part” of the dreamer at all as some people seem to erroneously believe, but situational connections with outside forces or external concerns as in real life. Some dreams have characters that are a “part” of the dreamer (as a reflection of one’s particular attributes for review), but many do not, especially the very common literally precognitive layers.

Original journal entry dated Feb. 9th 2002:

I had another bizarre dream last night. In it, M and A were going to a college in California, and they were driving there. I was going to a college in Michigan, and bummed because I couldn't go with my friends. My mother and her boyfriend were going to a casino somewhere. Anyway, M and A, instead of using a map, rolled up a little ball of clay and gave it a face. It would shout directions at them and tell them how to get where they wanted. But it was EVIL. And its strength came from mirrors. So at one point, they smashed every mirror in the hotel room trying to kill it. But it WOULDN'T DIE! And they'd given my mother one of them, too. As for myself, I had stayed home trying to figure out how I could follow my friends, but they showed up at my house saying that they hadn't been able to get to California. And then my mother and her boyfriend came home.


Original entry dated Feb. 1st, 2002:
Regarding several dreams taking place over a period of time:

Dream #1:
I dreamed about a vampire who was actually a large anthropomorphic lion, only he kept falling into lava and coming back to life. And I dreamed that I was at the Russian Olympic games, where one of the sports was to swing around a pole and see how far one could vault into the water. This feat was performed by 6 foot tall 8-year-olds. I sat in the bleachers, only I didn't have a ticket, so when they came around looking at peoples' tickets, I forged one and tried to remain inconspicuous.

Dream #2:
I dreamed that we were in a car trying to cross a bridge, which was actually a large ramp across a channel - you accelerated and then flew through the air and landed on the other side - but we kept crashing and dying.

Then I was on an ocean-liner with my aunt, and there was a murderer loose, and he would claim his next victim by slashing them on the thumb a day or two before he killed them. And my aunt got a slash on her thumb, so then she was really scared, and then my finger turned into a squid, so we all became vegetarians because we could no longer stand the sight of shrimp.

dream : comments : lucid

Friday, 27th of July 2012

Man, I've been out of contact for a while. This is just a little entry despite the fact that I had approximately 1 billion dreams last night.

I was in an amazing Japanese city where every building was the same style. They were completely made of glass, with some panels of frosted glass creating a stylized design. It was as if the city had been completely built by one company (probably Apple, judging by how it looked and the fact that there was an Apple store there) from scratch.
The buildings were all sleek and curved at the front and the streets were completely empty. I was just jumping around talking about how it was the coolest place ever. EVER.

Then I went to a shop and bought some squid which was rotten.
Then I went on a trip to some scary drug dealers house.
Then I was at Nooks' house and some bad guys kidnapped us and killed us.
Then we were going on a trek but there was mud and water everywhere.
Then there were helicopters.


It was crazy.

Type: Regular dream.
Lucidity: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Vividness: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Notes:
I'm currently away from home, which has benefitted my recall for some reason. I will be away for the next two weeks, so here's hoping I can finally get that elusive high-level LD and complete the next installment of the MDP. The other two were very shallow and uneventful. I'm posting these entries from my iPod for the duration of the trip, meaning possible typos and other formatting errors. I'm checking them over but something is bound to mess up and go unnoticed, so please excuse any errors.

Part 1 - Gale

I was in a basement of an unidentifiable house. This basement was square in shape with white walls and plush tan carpet. It was soft to walk on, which I couldn't feel with my feet, but I did see how the carpet sunk slightly with every step I took. The room wasn't well lit at all; it was dark except for one circular light right in the ceiling, which gave off a yellow glow that didn't quite fill the entire room. It was more of a spotlight. The light was shining down onto a polished wooden coffee table directly underneath it. I was still near the walls of the room, so I turned and started to walk towards the table. As soon as I took another step, the dream seamlessly skipped and I was now right by the table, on my knees, crouching down slightly to look at something that was underneath it.

I saw Gale Boetticher, a character from the television series Breaking Bad, under the table.

Gale was lying under the table on his back, his legs sticking out from one end. His eyes were open but not wide, and his mouth was slightly parted. The back of his head looked bloody, although it was in shadow (the rest of him should've been too, because the table was blocking the light from reaching him, but for some reason his body was well lit. I noticed that some of the skull on the back of his head was missing too. I knew that he was dead. I did not feel scared or ominous, but simply a vague sadness.

The dream skipped again. I was now standing up. Gale was now lying on the table, still on his back with his arms hanging over the sides, and underneath in the carpet was a large, irregularly-shaped patch of blood that looked older. It was fully absorbed into the carpet. I wasn't sure why I was there with the body, whether because I killed him or because my mother did - you can understand why I considered these possibilities as you read the rest of this dream.

Part 2 - Escape

I was in a room downstairs in my house. The room was about 15x15 feet, and pretty much empty. There was only a queen-sized bed with a wool blanket of lighter cream color on top; it was small compared to the mattress so it didn't hang over the sides that much. The headboard was an antique-style rectangle of polished wood. The room didn't have a closet, even though it had a large one in real life. In the right corner of one wall was a very basic wooden door with no patterns or anything, and it was wide open.

I knew my mom was in the house, and that she would be coming after me, furious and pissed off. She was trying to kill me. I was positioned a few feet from a small rectangular window on the wall, which was a good seven feet up and only two feet wide, much less tall. That was my only chance of escaping. I looked back at the doorway; she wasn't here yet. I had to get out now though. I knew that she wasn't armed, but she was capable of severely hurting me or killing me. I then looked up at the window, a good two feet above me, and jumped at it, pulling myself up easily with my hands (it was indented a few inches in the wall). The window itself was a plain panel of thicker glass. I punched it and it shattered as if the glass was thin and delicate; the pieces were thin too. I scrambled out on my stomach and into the my backyard, which was where the window led to. That's all I remember about this segment.

Part 3 - Rooftops

This was a shorter part of the dream. I was still on the run from my mother, but now my sister was with me. It was still daytime, and we were in a suburban neighborhood. The houses were all similar in nature, with modern stucco exteriors. There were only slight variations in the shapes and sizes. I was walking, rather fast, down the sidewalk of a longer road with my sister, with the houses on both sides. The road was just asphalt, there were no lines or markings or cars.

I turned around and saw my mother coming out from around the side of a house. She was looking around a lot, and then her head suddenly turned towards me. Although she was wearing black sunglasses and was a good block and a half away, I could tell she was furious and that her look was sadistic. "Come on!" I whispered sharply to my sister, and I made a big jump up onto the top of a house. I didn't see my sister follow me and jump onto the house, but I "knew" she was right behind me. I also "knew" that my mom couldn't jump that high, but we still had to lose her. We ran down the (flat, although from the ground the roofs were all triangular) rooftops and jumped to the next one over and over. As we did, the viewpoint changed from first to third person. During third person view, the roofs we were traveling on became triangular again. We had lost my mom by the end of the segment.

Part 4 - Policeman

It was in the evening, dark outside, and I was in a large community building, almost like the dining hall of a homeless shelter. I'm not sure what I was doing here because the dream didn't give any hints. I didn't see anyone that I knew (including my sister). I saw many people all gathered in different spots in the room, talking to each other; the whole room was like a convention. I don't remember many details of this place, except there were two full-story windows with many different pieces in them. Past the windows, it was very dark outside, and you couldn't see anything out there. But that wasn't the important part. I was near the entranceway, which was wide enough for three people to walk through shoulder-to-shoulder, positioned near the corner of where two walls joined; past this entrance was a hallway going perpendicular to it.

I was about to walk through into the hallway. I was mere feet away from the door when a police officer suddenly walked up to me. He was a heavier-built man in a black police uniform, with very dark grey patches here and there. He was probably six feet, whereas I'm only five feet, four inches. He looked at me and said, "excuse me, can you come here please?" and gestured toward me with his pointer finger. Then he looked away slightly, down at the ground as if I were a kid and he was about to ask, 'what was that?'. I quickly walked past him and had to push his hand off my arm; he was barely gripping me yet I felt that could've been enough to get ahold of me. I got away though.

Sometime after this, I hijacked a car and drove away with it, but I don't remember what kind/colour it was. I only know that I was going fast down a street, and that there was a man clutching the outside of the car, trying to hold on, and his face was sticking into the car through the open window. He was saying, "give me my car back!". I rolled the window up on him by pushing the horn section of the steering wheel.

Part 5 - The River

This segment began with me running up to a fence, grabbing the diamond-shaped links, and pulling myself over it easily. In this part of the dream, I was using superpowers, mainly super strength. As soon as I got over the fence and landed, I landed on a grassy riverbank; it was only ten feet until the river. This river, on both sides, was lined by trees but the part of the riverbank I was on had no trees; it was a small clearing.

Needless to say, I made two floating superjumps, and on the second one, I got within a foot of the river. I jumped into it and the river dropped off sharply; I was now in deep water. From the outside, it definitely looked like it should've dropped off slowly because I could see the sloping rocks and pebbles under the water, but that was not the case. I turned left and started swimming down the river at a slightly faster than normal speed. Somehow I managed to keep my head above the water, even though I wasn't using my arms at all. I knew I'd have to go under, though, because I was afraid the man whose car I'd stolen, and my mother, would see me. I also knew that to go underwater, I had to be able to breathe underwater. I vaguely remember asking a fisherman for a spell that could do this, which he told me, and I remember actively trying to memorize it. When I spoke the spell, I had a Harry Potter-related vision. Harry was in his red "triwizard tournament" swimming outfit (from The Goblet of Fire). At that moment, I went underwater and attempted to breathe, with a slight fear that I wouldn't be able to, and that I would drown. But I was able to breathe. It was like taking in heavier air; it required more lung power. I arced deeper underwater where it became almost pitch black, and I saw two strange squids coming towards me. They were burgundy and had yellow eyes. When I saw them, the lighting quickly became a bit brighter and bluer, but I still couldn't see them perfectly. I grabbed the first one, which must have been the size of a seadoo, and pulled its tentacles off. There was no blood or anything; the tentacles came off in one big bunch as if it were a living toy made of two pieces. The connecting outline was wavy. I squished the other squid against the underwater "wall" of the river. Again, there was no blood.