Recent DJ Posts

I was leading group of friends and family to some dark castle. We moved to an entry chamber, it was really dark but I knew that there would be some traps in there. I sharpened my senses - everything turned grayish and some bats were highlighted red. We moved onward and they only flied away. Going through some square we got to a fortified village and got attacked by squads of mercenaries. They shot whole group down, only I was left. I grabbed some guns and started shooting, quickly eliminating threat.

Recalled a precognitive dream: I was in school, writing something in an electronic device - foresters' index.

A small island of sand, checking water & air quality (but really in space) - Doesn't make sense this morning.


Climbing into a blender.... and getting wizzed up??!!! Also, doesn't make much sense..... It felt like ones I was blended into a pulp I could reach further?


I was also in an Aunty's house (again, one of my mums sisters) I lived there for a bit when I was 18. It's a house I've drempt of before it's always vastly exaggerated though .... writing this I've suddenly recalling a whole dream world that spreads out around this building that I've visited many times (It has secret tunnels, magic gardens and mysterious neighbours and deep closets filled with old family treasures)


Anyhooo .....In the dream I'm standing at the front bedroom window were I lived for a year or so.... they view though - wow!

There is no glass and It's an ever changing landscape of mythical mountains, industrial space scape's, tracks, distant city's.

It's keeps getting shrouded in clouds and mist and then they thin to reveal another different world, I'm blown away by the detail, the seasons are changing fast too. My vision is mobile too... while I'm aware 'I' am standing in the window my site can leave me and travel into the landscapes or distant settlements for a better view.


(I don't have much detal yet for this, but get the feeling it will be resited and built on over the coming months)

I went to sleep early last night & got up late. I took my meds only at the beginning of the night at 9pm & fell asleep about 10:15 so it may be why my mind was opened up more. I also cut way back on my smoking a week ago because Mike & I are working towards quitting. I'm actually really grateful for not being foggy, regardless of the fear I experienced at times during the following entries.

My first experience of the night. I was sleeping & Mike had left earlier for work so this was probably around 6am. I started sleeping on my back in February or March but somehow I ended up on my stomach. I felt the all to familiar feelings of terror as I felt my body being forcefully pushed down into my bed & I couldn't move at all. Sleep paralysis is something I am all too familiar with. It seemed to go on forever. Eventually I was able to move & woke up to go smoke half a cig. I then went back to my bed to try to have an OOB/AP experience. I laid back down & tried to raise my vibrations but I've been sick & what is usually an easy thing for me to do was not happening at all. This is where I interject that ethereal entities are drawn to ppl when they are sick or deeply depressed. I am not depressed my any means but we all know I have been sick.... I then fell back to sleep.

I awoke again to being held down again but this time it felt like a prepubescent male about 12 which disturbed me on a whole other level. I can't explain how I felt this but maybe it will make some sense later on as you read... I felt scared at first but also confused. I've never encountered some entity that I would consider to be some kind of lost confused soul of some sort. I didn't feel like he meant anything bad but I still had some real fear present because entities can do things like impersonate a being that you wouldn't fear. Anyway, I finally came out of the sleep paralysis & got up to pee & went back to sleep again. (Side note: I was on my side when this all occurred which is also not very common for me. And also the phrase, "prepubescent male" is not a phrase I use yet I felt strongly about saying it this way.)

I awoke again on my side w/ the same feeling of this boy on me. It was like he was trying to scare me for some reason but now I'm not scared at all. Instead I feel bad for him. I can tell this time I can attempt to move like before when I had an OOB/AP but I tried to roll in the opposite direction than I normally do towards Mike's side of the bed in hopes of seeing him. But I just roll over & sit up. Nothing occurs. I then go to pee again & go back to sleep.

This time I have no sleep paralysis at all but enter a dream state. I feel the weight of this boy yet again in my dream state. He's looking at me & just trying to scare me. I became full blown lucid at this point. He is freaking out because I can see him. He is confused. He told me that no-one ever sees him. I said, "well I sure see you, why were you holding me down" he said he was trying to scare me but doesn't know why. He just sounds like a kid doing something kid like. Like he was getting a kick out of it as a sort of game. I'm in his house I think but I'm not sure. I'm in a bed there & the house looks old. I start walking around & the fixtures & everything is old not like a modern house might be. He's walking w/ me but he seems not fully solid to me but close, really close. Other people are there like a family. Eventually one by one the others start to see him too & he's excited & scared all at once. I feel like his guide or something. Like I'm supposed to help him or I'm here for a purpose that is his, not mine. Of course I think as a bi-product it has helped me in some way. The people seemed confused too & not much is really said. I then woke up.

I'm not sure why these kinds of things happen to me but I think maybe the boy in particular was there for a reason. I have been studying medium-ship for a while now & reading stories by mediums of real life sessions w/ ppl & the afterlife. I'm highly sensitive to ppl & feel energies. I've had OOB's/AP's. I've had encounters w/ 2 family members that have passed & I see my dead dog in my home. I'm always having strange urges to tell someone about something that will help them & I pass it on to them. I know when ppl are coming to my house a lot via dreams or feelings. Hence, I'm quite intuitive. I also am very in-tune to vibrations. I've been studying Spiritualism, which is not Religion so please don't confuse them. I'm very interested in Energy Healing & Spiritual Healing. I'd like to learn one or both. As of a week ago I have cut back on my smoking because of a strong feeling I have that this is blocking me. But in the end this is my weird life. I think I've been led down this path after so much strange & unusual turmoil in my life. Like I had to go through all of that to get to here. This is a great advantage to not being a young person anymore. With age comes wisdom & insight.

Yesterday: Non-Lucid- This dream was so vivid w/ color & hard to explain. My explanation of details will never do this dream justice. I was in some bazaar man made looking cave w/ tunnels. Some sort of cave system of sorts. The walls, floor & ceiling were *Luminescent (i had to look this up because I new it wasn't fluorescent & I wanted to be accurate) in color. There were lots of people but it wasn't crowded, I kept coming upon groups, couples & single people as I explored this place. We were all having some super natural experience. Someone would throw this strange looking sphere & it would move in all kinds of directions on it's own. Sometimes it would just move real slow, fast or zip around just to mention a few. At intervals there were other ppl throwing one of these balls & it would always do something different. Something went wrong w/ and the person near me said I would have to throw the ball because they were needed elsewhere. Then a guy asked me if I knew where to log in & I said no & that I didn't work there. I was trying to tell him I had never done this before. Then he told me to change to the Fire Safety Code so, I punched in a 3 digit code. The guy I was subbing for came back & was flipping out acting all strange. He looked like Paulie from this season's Big Brother & was an asshole. But he was gay unlike Paulie & was professing his love for another man there & exposing some secret affair. The other guy had a wife, lol. The married couple were both freaked out. The guy professing his love made these digital hearts & arrows in the air. It was actually pretty cool. There were a lot of them.... Now enters some military ppl. Some in an official & unofficial capacity. If I had to explain what this cave looked like I would liken it to Blue Ice but was alive & had some other colors in it.

*Luminescence is emission of light by a substance not resulting from heat; it is thus a form of cold-body radiation. It can be caused by chemical reactions, electrical energy, subatomic motions, or stress on a crystal.

Because of today's entry I want to keep it separate so I will be following this with a separate journal entry.

Morphing Store: Me and some friends find an abandoned plaza with a broken window. W climb in and investigate. It looks like a party place, junkfood wrappers, liquor bottles, clothes, blankets, graffiti. This saddens me. I climb out and mean to board up the window but when I look back inside the place has morphed into a clean, freshly abandoned shop. We try to leave but a pack of angry dogs won't let us. I talk to the dogs to keep their attention while the others try sneak off.

Beggars: I am starving and filthy. I try sneak into a hotel to scrub up in the bathroom. I am caught and tossed. The guy who tossed me comes back and gives me a half pack of hotdogs. How nice. I hate hotdogs. I accept them. Beggars can't be choosers, right? Friends suddenly appear. We split the hotdogs between us. As eat the last one I look into the pack and see various sizes of maggots squirming around. I want to puke but I don't. I hold the food down by telling myself "at least the maggots weren't crawling through shit and trash". Horrible how a seemingly kind deed can turn out so hateful.

Air Attack: I lounge in the sun and three drones fly over. I give them the finger. Shortly after fighter planes, bombers, helicopters, and tanks roll in. I run. People follow. We hide behind a stump, as if that will conceal us from wildly attacking forces. I can't stand the sound of the bombs. I cover my ears and am filled with hatred but can do nothing. A soldier finds us, lays by the stump and tells us he will let the others escape as long as one of us surrenders. Of course I'm the one who surrenders. The others dash into the forest without so much as a thank you. Oh well. Moments later planes fly over and incinerate the woods. I am dragged along into the heart of the battle.

River Hill: A hillside river appears in many of my dreams. I never remember much about these dreams. Last night: I forge a new path to the river which lay frozen over in the middle of summer. I think I had to save what little water was left before it froze over completely. Others were involved. I remember horses. Nothing more.

Last night bed 9pm - 2:50 am

2x300 alpha GPC 2:57 am
2x4 pure Galantamine 4:05 am

Had some breakfast, read the TOTM thread, poked around the forum and chat.

Went on a sofa right after taking GM at 4:05 am

1hr30 min long lucid. Had 3 distinct breaks in it when I felt my whole head be cold and buzzing, instead of the usual top back of the head.

Fell asleep immediatelly. Had a lucid even lasting till 5:49 when I decided to wake up to remember it better. But I didn't get up, went back to sleep.

Didn't do anything major, so I'm just gonna write some bullet points.

1. All 3-4 parts of the lucid event were in same part of the town where my gramma lived. At night. Not very inviting place, I wanted to get out of there badly.

2. Lots of looking up at the stars realizing that I never do it so happy that I finally did. It was beautiful with lots of stars.

3. Looking for the moon wanting to fly there. I was hoping that having a target will make it easier to fly, because I was having trouble flying.

First I only flew at hight of some small trees. Hitting the branches as going through them. Remembering another lucid when it felt more real. Grabbing on to branches, climbing up higher, then doing the same at the next tree to go higher again.

Then I blew up a weather balloon and it was helping me to float a little bit.

4. Major breakthrough - when it was dark either during the transition or after, I "opened my eyes" first time sucessfully and actually saw. Once I wished I was flying by a nebula, but I don't think I saw a nebula. I was opening my eyes slowly but without much resistance.

5. I remembered what sageous said about higher level lucids and memory. So I told myself where I live, town I grew up in and that I am at home sleeping on a sofa. When I woke up, town names were correct.

6. I remembered the TOTM. I wanted to find the olympic couldron but the lucid was ending and I didn't remember it in the next one.

I don't remember any more. Last 20 or so minutes before I woke up were spent looking for sex, but I don't think it was lucid. I remember me wanting to test how touch feels differently in a lucid, so I asked a girl if I can feel her boobies. She said yes and I did.

I will add more if I remember it.

The non-lucid part after I went back to sleep. I was in small cafeteria of my old school, again looking for sex. Ended up talking to some girl students and being nostalgic after my old school. Then I was telling a group of them about lucid dreaming, but they were more interested in listening to someone who had zero experience but he had some fantastic claims about something related. I let them be.

My dream was long and varied, but the one thing I'd love to talk about was a videogame that I created last night. The game was an RTS that was based entirely around drawing lines into the ground. The game starts just like any RTS with a home area with some resources, and the first thing you do is trance a line around an area of resources that will immediately sprout castle walls once you complete the line to itself. An auto algorithm puts the front door, parapets and windows in, and makes a cool castle based on your shape. Then the building spawns workers that work the resource inside. If you trace lines around the castle, it makes walls. Soon after doing this there are enough resources to start buying units. They will emerge from the first castle (you can keep making them) and there are many classes of them. You control them by right clicking instead of left clicking, which draws lines of command instead of building. The lines control their paths and behavior and are very subtle yet complex.

Then you fight the other guy.

Morning of September 22, 2016. Thursday.



I am in Africa on a long expedition. My wife Zsuzsanna and our children and some unknown people are on the journey. Curiously, the “vehicle” we are using to travel in is only a tent that is somehow moving over the savanna without any apparent explanation (as it does not seem to have wheels; it somehow slides slowly over the ground). I have seven pet lions, at least three being male. They walk along with us on our journey without incident.

A male lion is inside the tent at one point but is not a threat. I am also in the tent for a time to “sleep” and also to look at a treasure map. As we travel over the savanna, I watch the scene from above for a time but I am eventually back in my physical form. We are seeking some sort of magical or at least special material, a roll or piece of cloth with special properties, the location of which is apparently indicated on the map.

We reach an isolated outdoor market where there are several African cashiers, at least three of them females around forty years of age. They seem to be selling the special cloth we had been seeking. There are two counters set up on each side of an outside area I enter. I examine a cloth which I first feel may be what we are seeking. A cashier tells me that it is a thousand dollars for a yard of it. I am not so sure this situation will work out. I go to the opposite counter to look around a bit.

One male lion walks around near the counters, being as tame as a dog, and I pat its head. Other people do not seem to be at all concerned about my lions.

Eventually, I notice a piece of cloth that I expect is the one we need. It is uneven though and is not quite a yard. The cashier tells me this one is also a thousand dollars if I want it. I almost express my annoyance to her but I do not. I take out my wallet and pull out one fifty-dollar bill after another, materializing the money out of thin air just at the point my hand is in the wallet, deliberately doing this and realizing this, but without dream state lucidity. I assertively hand her the money which I just mentally willed out of my wallet, twenty fifty-dollar notes, which I know is exactly a thousand dollars. She happily gives me the material.

The cloth’s design shows a repeating pattern (in mostly bright orange, yellow, and sepia saturated hues) of a scene of two lions (male and female) lying in the savanna in front of a boulder and a tree and the sun on the horizon in the background at their left. I pick up the supposed special cloth from the counter and we are on our way. Of course, this represents Zsuzsanna and I sleeping together during the sunrise, the cloth being a literal association with bed sheets and pillow cases.

---

Lion autosymbolism has already been explained in many of my past entries, but here is a brief rundown: Factor one is coalescence (potentially being “swallowed” back into whole consciousness) and factor two is the augmented domestic cat association as being a “witness” to the dream state and the nature of liminal space (that is, the autosymbolic waking process). This dream is based on a partial association with “The Sleeping Gypsy”, an 1897 oil painting by French Naïve artist Henri Rousseau. The association transforms into the ending autosymbolism of this dream of which also represents art and the nature of sleeping and dreaming, as dreams are autosymbolic of the nature of the dream state and waking process itself. The cashiers and the checkout scenario are autosymbolic of the dream state’s implied exit point.

---

I run an art academy for troubled kids. One boy of 15 is scarily talented and destined for fame. He promises the students that if he becomes a big artist he will come back and wisk them all away.

But in walks my cousin. She seduces the boy. He loses all interest in art. We all know he now will never amount to anything more than a sex slave for an old nympho lady. My cousin and the boy hop into a car and peel out of the academy.

The other students and I refuse to let her steal him. We can’t give chase because we have no vehicles. We do have a few little red toy jeeps. Standing in the yard it very slowly dawns that this whole situation could be a dream. I look at the students worried faces and decide that if this is a dream I will do everything in my lucid power to rescue our artist.

I take a plastic toy car and place the palms of my hands on the door. I slowly slide my hands in opposite directions along the vehicle and it lengthens. I smile and think, “we ARE dreaming”. I continue to enlarge the vehicle until a bunch of students can fit inside. I do the same to the second toy car. Another batch of students climb into it. They all leave.

But I have no vehicle. “I need a car.” I say to the dream. Another toy vehicle appears but it looks like a miniaturized child’s car bed instead of a battery operated toy car. It’ll do. I lengthen the toy just enough for me to sit on it. I think for it to move forward. It goes, jerkily at first, then smooths out the faster I go. I catch up to the other two vehicles. We see the artist far ahead of us pull into driveway.

We all pull into the drive and are met by a giant black bear that will not let us pass. The bear is chained up. The students will be safe. I super leap into a tree to see where my cousin went. She has turned into a crusty old farmer who drags the boy toward the barn. I look down and see the grass is cut into C shapes and they slide and shift into curvy patterns. They mean something but I don’t have time to decipher.

I jump down to the bear. It rears and is a good 4 feet higher than me. I leap up and hover before its face, place my hand on its forhead and sing, “All is well, all is well, all is well, to you I tell.” The bear calms and flops lazily onto the ground. Some kids stay with the bear. Others come to rescue the artist.

We get to the barn just in time to see a pick up truck speed across the field. The students run back for their car. I pick up a stick and hold it in both hands behind and across my butt. I sit on the stick and lift into the air as if on a swing. I fly along in this manner close behind the truck. The students in the car catch up. They want a flying swing as well. I tell them to hop on a stick and fly along. They do, but ride theirs as a witch will ride a broomstick.

We catch the old farmer and the boy going into a concert hall but they escape when security confronts us. I have no time for this and push them backwards. They blink out of existence with a strange bwooping sound like defeated video game baddies. We rush into the concert and split up to find the artist. I’m far too impatient to search so sit and whisper, “Find me.” The artist steps out of the crowd and sits by my side. I tell him this is a dream and I demand he tell me what he really is. He only ever gives me cryptic replies like, “I am somewhere.” Or “I am dark matter.” When he asks who I really am I tell him, “I am the Walrus.” We both laugh.

He never tells me who he is and eventually we get lost in the concert music.

Dream from Sept 21st
7 hours sleep

Baby Kennel: I go visit my niece in the hospital. Incubators with malformed and sick babies line the halls. The incubators are stacked three high. Some of the babies wake and stare at me. I should acknowledge them all but if I do I will never get to visit my niece. Perhaps on the way out I will talk with the babies. I get to my niece and my sister tells us the hospital has changed to a sick baby kennel.

Unplugged: Noise in my basement leads me down to it. The lights won’t come on. The whole basement is pitch black except for a single beam of light shining through the window onto a very old Kurt Cobain. He sits wearily in the old armchair. I ask why he is in my basement and he answers with songs from the unplugged album. I sit and sing with him.

Fat Gibson: At a gala and people gather around a celebrity. It's Mel Gibson. He is very fat, his belly literally looks as if a giant beach ball is stuffed inside it. The shirt has jumbled flags, stars, and stripes all over it. He acts like a pig.

Star Search: I spend too much time with my telescope trying to find an elusive comet in a night sky overly packed with stars.

Dreams for Sept 21st
7 hours sleep

Last night bed 9pm - 2:50 am

2x300 alpha GPC 2:57 am

Dream before 2:50am

There was something with an old arab. He was rich and people were kinda scared of him, he was like a "boss" of the neighborhood. We go there through lots of hallways with some bodyguards. The room we get to is huge, lots of sofas and pillows.

Leaving through stairs on a wall. It's a solid rock wall of a mountain, perfectly vertical. There are only somy protrusions like stair rungs. Somebody is leading me. I stop to take a picture with my camera phone. The person looks back so I show him the picture later that he is in it too, if it's ok with him.

DR2
Walking by some hills that people use for picknicks. We have a spot there too, thinking about exchanging it for another one.

DR2
Walking through a new neighborhood looking for a house we are suppose to move into. Somebody lived there before. Their neghbors are suppose to help us with taking our boy to school, since we are new. I'm trying to talk to this woman who is getting her son dressed. She is the one who is suppose to help. I keep saying Hi, but as if she didn't hear me. Somebody finally taps her on the shoulder and she lifts her head. Her face looks beat up, eyelid swollen, tears in her eyes.

Recall was for the most part bad. Too much waking life crap going on which I'm having trouble keeping off my mind during the night.

Lots of sex scenes spread over the night after a fairly long absence. So I'll just make the rest of this entire DJ entry into a spoiler.

Spoiler for many sexual scenes:

+(f) sex outside by a river? Then a scene of a girl pulling stuff out of her mouth?

+ close up view of the process of a sword being sharpened by laying it on a bed of fist-sized rocks and rubbing rocks and things on top of it. Sitting at a table and I want the guys at the table to take a look at my sister's (instrument) and I pull it out and hold it in my hands and look at the strings and try to figure out which string it was I wanted adjusted/replaced, I want to pass it around the table but I know my sister would probably hate that, I ask her and she says "Oh, so they can ruin it like they did with <some other thing>?"

+(f) <perform an impossible sexual stunt>

+ I'm in a dark bedroom, my friend MR has brought a girl for sex? I get a brief glimpse of her, I close my laptop (which has pictures displaying on the top of the closed cover? 2nd time that's happened), I'm standing in the dark bedroom and turn around and the bed is empty, I believe that I can will the girl to return simply by expecting it, I open the covers and get into the bed but she never returns

+(f) outside daylight suburban street scene: I see some odd animals and insects. Some "bunny" is on the road with people around it and they're goading it to do something? I see some small thing like a mouse in its mouth and the rabbit is shaking its head vigorously.

+ LD#204 LUCIDD (<- my new DV-search-friendly keyword for finding lucid dreams in my DJ) #204 I'm about to try doing an <impossible sexual stunt> and, remember that I did this earlier in a dream, If I can do this, that means I'm dreaming... and it works, and I get lucid, and I continue for a bit. I stop and get up and there are people at the door (a man?). I'm in my CH sister's bedroom. Then a woman enters and her top is open and and she gets down and continues the fun. I first try to stabilize by noticing the surroundings, the floor is littered with clothing, I look at it and touch it there is a pile of red cloth there (a shirt?), but I soon wake up once she starts.

+(f) I see a line up of girls who will be participating in the porn shoot in the next room? I go to the next room and some people direct the girls to get into position there in the scene

It’s daytime and I’m driving a white motorcycle in what appears to be an Indonesian city. I’m driving on the left side of the road. I decide to stop my bike on the side of the road. I think I may be dreaming, but I’m not sure yet and I don’t want to take any chances, considering that I’m driving a motorcycle. I try to push my fingers through my palm and it works. I instantly realise that I am indeed dreaming. I decide to get up from the bike. The whole steering section has just vanished, allowing me to dismount very easily. I continuously re-push my finger through my palm and keep telling myself that I’m dreaming. I think of other things that I can do to stabilise the dream. I’m doing good so far. I might even win the challenge with werty52 to have a 5 minute long lucid. I decide to strengthen the dream by focusing on my senses. I drop to the ground and run my hands over the sand that’s on the ground. The sense of touch is very realistic. It feels awesome. Throughout the dream I feel some excitement, but I contain it.

I am in a room somewhere inside. I have the feeling it’s an Indonesian room somehow. I feel the need to RC (perhaps because I feel like I’ve had a FA, though I’m not sure anymore) so I try to push my finger through my palm and it works. I realise I’m dreaming again. I consider what to do for a moment. I don’t have any real goals, any actions to undertake. I walk over close to a wall. Then I crouch down on the ground, placing my hands on the ground as well. I decide to let myself phase through the ground. I know that normally this is done with the wall, but ah, whatever. Without putting any conscious effort into it, I slowly start sinking into the ground. I wonder what will await me on the other side. I get about halfway through when I hear a sound that throws me off guard. I assume it to be from the waking world, though I’m not certain. It’s the sound of a mobile food vendor coming by.

I’m in a similar, or perhaps the same room again. I’m seated in a comfy chair. I’m already considering that I might be dreaming again and perform the finger through palm technique. I’m not fully convinced by the results, because my finger goes through at the edge of my palm, making me doubt whether it really went through or just along the side. For some reason I can’t make it out very clearly. A bit in the distance are two white people, a guy and a girl my age. They come over to talk. I’ve never met before. Now I’m performing the same RC over and over, while trying to have a conversation with 2 strangers and trying to make a good first impression. The guy is German and has me using my very limited vocabulary. The girl is from Australia. We talk for a bit more. Eventually I want to get this RC right so I ask the guy to touch index finger tips with me. I figure that this way I won’t be attempting to smash my finger through my hand like an idiot and if my finger passes through his, I’m dreaming. Yeah.. totally normal request to make. So much for a good first impression.

Morning of September 22, 2016. Thursday.



It seems to be late at night and I am walking with Zsuzsanna in an unfamiliar small town. Somehow I get distracted and find myself on my own in an area vaguely similar in some ways to an area near a church in Bundaberg (though I do not consider my location or have any concern about being in an unknown place). Even though I am not lucid I try to focus on a large stone water fountain as if I am subliminally aware of the nature of water induction to increase the depth and clarity of the dream state.

An unfamiliar priest approaches and seems to want me to move on or is there to tell me what to do as perhaps he does not like me being here so late at night. He tries to impress me by causing a moonbeam to create a glowing circle on the surface of the water. In a way, it seems rather eerie to me, though I vaguely recall it as a circadian rhythms factor (again, even though I am not lucid) and relative to moon or moonlight induction.

“So what,” I say. “I can make the sun come out in the middle of the night.” (I say this without realizing that the sun represents consciousness or the conscious identity within the dream state and thus I am actually talking about lucid dreaming without being lucid.) The area that the priest and I are standing now seems to be a storefront. I move my hands with a level of mental certainty and expectation that the sun will rise at my command, though again not being lucid at this point. Instead, a small sunbeam reaches my feet. At least I accomplished something based on my claim.

I decide to turn around and use whatever sunlight there is to mock the priest by making various shadow forms on the outer wall of the store. A circle of light (almost like a spotlight on a stage) of about a foot and a half in diameter appears on the concrete block outer wall. I lift my left hand up and make an incredibly realistic monkey shadow (after a few false starts with rabbit and dog heads), complete with legs, arms, and a tail, and moving about like a real monkey, almost as if suspended on its own. “Chee-chee-chee-chee,” I utter, happily making my version of a monkey sound. The priest seems to feel insulted as well as outdone by my miraculous abilities and thus he walks off. Even though I am still not at the lucid stage, shadow play is fairly common in certain vivid lucid dream types. Typically, the shadow symbolizes the dream self as “casting” conscious self identity into the dream state (at least when it is a human “duplicate” of the dream self though here, my dawning consciousness is apparently very playful), though this situation does not yet trigger my lucidity.

As I walk, the sun finally rises fully at my subtle command and with no “glitches”. As a result, my consciousness becomes more fully integrated into the dream state in a lucid sense, though not quite apex lucidity (full automatic control with enhanced senses and full body awareness even with full weight and momentum discernment). Just as I turn left around a corner I am at full conscious clarity, which I immediately find very thrilling. I notice a young version of Zsuzsanna (probably as she was a few years before we first wrote) standing on a garden wall of about four feet high, though I do not question this oddity. Several others (all unfamiliar) are standing around, possibly waiting for a bus. Zsuzsanna may also be waiting for the bus even being up on this wall. I hover and move up to stand on the wall with her. She does not seem to recognize me yet and takes on the essence of the preconscious personification.

“This is my dream, so we will get together and have some fun,” I boldly state. “I don’t care about these other people standing around.” She seems to slowly agree or at least lets me hug and kiss her passionately for a long time. Becoming more and more stimulated I indulge in various sensual events (the sense of touch augmented), though meanwhile, three times, for no particular reason, I decide to shoot large masses of spiderweb out of my right hand. One car becomes fully covered in my web, the imagery of which I find amusing when I look back. A couple people are swept back and stuck onto buildings but are not harmed.

Eventually, I notice a large unusual-looking airplane flying in the sky (from right to left). Its wings are up and back almost like a butterfly form and I feel a sense of beauty. Curiously, I do not mentally register it as the “return flight” waking transition symbol even though I have experienced the same metaphor thousands of times in various dream types (though not in the majority of lucid dreams). I notice a very unusual bookshelf-like structure on the other side of town and which seems to be atop a mountain. I focus on this. Although it vaguely reminds me of “Hollywood Squares”, the platforms (or seating areas) are at different levels. There are at least nine demigods in yellow Tibetan monk robes sitting and standing within the structure. I assume they are perhaps thirty feet tall or more. The visible forward edges of the skewed “Hollywood Squares” structure are mostly cream-colored, orange, and yellow. The demigods begin singing to Zsuzsanna and me very loudly and with love and happiness. The music is very clear and rhythmic and very enjoyable (though of an unfamiliar melody which I may record at a future date). They are singing something about tilling and gardening, something like, “In the morning when you wake up, till the soil with love…” and another phrase with “tilling” in it and something about “the next morning you will find”. It goes on for several minutes and as I hold Zsuzsanna, I slip into a less vivid and non-lucid false awakening as the airplane reaches the midpoint of my perspective, over the seemingly divine structure. (Of course, this structure symbolizes the sunrise and waking as non-lucid dreams typically do in the last segment - even though I am still semi-lucid - and a cheerful conscious coloring of my day ensues.)

In the false awakening I am with Zsuzsanna sitting on the floor of our present home. Our youngest son is present. He seems to have gathered seven unusual creatures (there are seven in our family). They seem to be some sort of unlikely composite of seashell, caterpillar, beetle, and chrysalis. For some reason, I point out to Zsuzsanna that they are “brains”, although I add to their number (starting with three, I think) as I notice more and more of them (though still a total of seven). Their shells are very complex in coloring, with mostly thin bands and paisley-like patterns of browns, yellows, and cream colors. There are two different shapes, the two largest being somewhat cylindrical and the others like trapezoidal prisms.

I look at a magazine page that Zsuzsanna is looking at. At first, I see the same airplane as from my previous dream, though as a silhouette in a full page sky photograph. As I tell Zsuzsanna about the dream I just had (the most common false awakening scenario for me other than actually attempting to write it out and soon seeing that my writing changes or that I had written nothing), I tell her how this looks just like the airplane from my dream. I find that unusual but when I look again, I see that it is an upside-down helicopter silhouette (a second “return flight” transition that actually represents my false awakening and how one of the first things I ever heard Zsuzsanna say on her first cassette which she mailed to me being “so if it sounds a bit upside-down, it’s from down-under), which I find rather curious - and from here I actually wake.

I was working in Amsterdam (never did in real life). The place was a district full of old Dutch buildings in any of which there was an IT department with mine, in accordance with real life, being Java development). There was a canal in the middle, in perfect Amsterdamse stijl. Among the few weird things, there was a woman crying silently that didn't want to speak about it with me, and a girl being stalked by a creepy guy, protected by her brother and me.

I woke many and many times tonight and every single time I did a reality check. Unfortunately I was always awake for real.