lucid

Was in a dream where I was fighting a metal robot while being a high jumping metallic rubber band. I decided to run from it and run in to the darkness. I wanted to end my dream as I wasn't enjoying it. During the darkness when the dream faded I became lucid and realized I was waiting for the next dream to form. Once it did it was nighttime and I was in third person. I thought about positive things and sunlight. That's when a grainy sunlight came in to the background but wasn't good quality.

I ended up losing lucidity not too long afterwards.

Im not sure which dream came first chronologically.

Lucid- I dont remember what the dream plot was before getting lucid, but i was on a long and wide garden path during a sunny day and there were children running around playing. The main path was long (i couldnt see the end) with lots of smaller tributary paths at even intervals with square patches where flowers grew to chest-height. the hand-size stones that made up the paths were also square. I think I was playing a game with the children + i was my male twin. I didnt do a RC, i just noticed i was dreaming. Once i realized this, I looked around for something to explore and one of the kids started chasing me (in good fun). I ran but focused on the feelings of running-the ground beneath me, the wind flying past, etc to strengthen the dream. This worked ! but then my cat woke me up or the alarm rang idk.

...opened the door for my cat and then tried to sleep a bit more before my alarm rang....

non-lucid - dont remember much about this one but it seemed significant and was (sort of) about the book im reading. I was my male twin again. I think i was playing a game gone sour between me and 'my feminine' vs another person and their opposite (i dont remember if i was playing against the man or woman). The significant thing was that the longer 'my feminine' stayed with my opponent, the more she was turned against me. I remember her changing colors from my black and blue to my oppontnt's white and yellow (or the other way around idk). She didnt look like me so I wonder who she was supposed to represent.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

Walking up an alley of a park with a younger sister or cousin. On arriving at a terrace where there is a restaurant, we are cut off by barriers and cannot pass, because Ronaldo has booked it to have a private lunch there and no one can go throughit. I am upset and try to go around, but then he arrives by car and also blocks my way. I try to just ignore and move on, but something happens and he ends up also taking a walk in the park, almost side by side to us. As I reminisce to my companion about this place and some memories from my childhood, I notice he is listening and curious to know more. He asks me something about a street ahead and I suddenly remember stuff about it and drag him along in my revisitation of the place. I stayed there in a pension for some time and as I remember more details, I basically offer him a tour to this small town. He totally abandons his lunch plans and just joins us for good. Then we pass by a small place I mention has great veggie food, very basic but delicious and I invite him to have lunch there with us. He makes a bit of a snarky comment because of the veggie food, but then is really surprised to see that it is a very simple place with locals and not some fancy modern joint and I see curiosity won. I swear to him he will not forget about this place, either he likes the food or not, just because it is so authentic. By chance my dad is there with my aunt Ana and other people. They are waiting in line because there are no seats. I join them waiting in line and Ronaldo says we don't have to because of who he is, certainly they'll get us some table. Of course people recognize him when he enters and talk about it and some are very welcoming to him, but those that are sitting and eating with friends and family aren't bulging for him to get a seat and the fact is there really are no tables. What people do is they rearrange the tables so we have an area where we can sit on the floor if we want. I am ok with it, but he is not and so we just leave and continue our tour outside.
My dad reminded me that not only we spent some vacation on this town, but that we own an old house on this street. I am surprised and can't remember that at all, but he says it is that small property that appears mentioned on the IRS form and somehow it makes sense to me. He says it's just a couple blocks away, so I go look for it. Spot some folks building up a new house in the place where I thought was ours, can't figure out which one it is, so then we return and keep waiting for a table at the restaurant. By now Ronaldo is definitely feeling the hots for me and he grabs me by the waist and grabs my ass and pushes me against a wall, about to kiss me. But then my dad suddenly appears and ruins the moment. Ronaldo goes get some air for a minute and my dad comes talk to me. I guess he must be really proud that I am snatching such a rich famous guy and indeed he is, but also makes some comment about his manners and I have to agree that he is not exactly being a gentleman with me. I am not sure how I feel about it.

Walking by a boardwalk by the sea, recognizing some places. Seeing them with so much detail and thinking I don't wanna go there, because it is a place from another dream I had one day and nothing good came out of it. Then realize I am dreaming and it is a very stable lucid. The first thing that comes to my mind is to summon Avalokiteshvara. I really don't know why that was my first thought, but I did. Unfortunately, I immediately get surrounded by a pack of menacing growling dogs like dobbermans and rotweillers and I have to climb over a wall to protect myself. They keep jumping at me, viciously trying to attack me and I realize they are the protection mechanism or agents that always come if you try to liberate yourself, or meet those who can help you with that. I hadn't met them in a while. Then I remember that they have no power over me unless I give it to them, so I point the palm of my hands at them and slowly push them away with a kind of force field that makes me untouchable. One by one, the dogs step down and leave. I keep walking down the boardwalk while repeating mantras and continue to call for the deity. Don't see it anywhere but some lady approaches me offering me t-shirts. I say no and she insists that I follow her. I feel she is up to no good and accuse her of trying to distract me. After insisting a couple times, she walks away but I keep an eye on her as she walks towards the ocean and stays on the sand at the beach nearby. Wonder if she may be a manifeststion of the deity inviting me to come along and I rejected her, but I don't feel it. She passes by me again and leaves a box on the sand. Some girl says this is a gift to me but I am still suspicious of her intentions, so I don't touch it. The box opens by itself and contains gold statuettes of what initially also look like deities, so for a while I think this might be a sign. But as I look closer, the statuettes represent just common people in sex acts, like one lady going down on another and a threesome where someone is banging another from behind. Don't know what all of it means, but I think this is just Mara tempting me with distractions. Then I wake up.

A dream scene where a kid was running around seeming crazy while kicking a soccer ball ended and switched to me waking up in a bed at the old townhouse I used to live in. When I got up I was greeted by a former co-worker in the past and his friend. I said hello and asked him what he is doing here? He told me that he was trying to reunite co-workers again that he enjoyed working with.

He and his friend wanted to go find more co-workers and ask me if I wanted to join him and I agreed. As I am walking out to the front door with them it started to dawn on me how odd this situation is. I also realize that I was taller than I previously was because I now had to duck down my head to walk through doors. I realize I am dreaming and attempted to phase through the window but it wasn't working.

I then remember that I was planning to lucid dream today because I wanted to meditate in my dreams. I sat down and crossed my legs to begin meditating. I started to hear an intense ring and heavy vibrations flowing within my head. Unfortunately the vibrations and intense ringing got so intense that it was painful and I began to scream about my head hurting. I had failed, I tried my best to wake up but it just seemed the dream faded and I was only in darkness with a few blurred lights coming in.

That's when another dream began to form and I found myself in a bed again to soon realize it was a false awakening. I attempted to wake up and found myself in another false awakening only this time I was not lucid.

I’m am going to my friend’s house. I put my foot under the closing garage door to stop it from closing. It closes on my foot and it hurts. I walk in to the garage. As soon as I do, I realize that I am in a lucid dream. Audible internal voice “And I’m in a lucid dream.” I also realize that this is my house not my friend’s. The garage looks dirty. I resolve to do a reality check and count my fingers. In the kitchen i count my fingers. They open slowly and my hand looks distorted making it very obvious that I am in a dream.
I want to wake up and record this in my journal, however I did not wake up right away. My wife is home and wants to go to the store with my newborn and pick up our friend’s newborn along the way. I count my fingers again. My fingers and hand are distorted and outstretched. “Where can i find child care !?”she says. “Where is your phone” i say. I pick up her phone and try to dial a number. however I notice they keypad icon on the iphone is now a skyscraper icon and won’t work. I wake up.

I had found myself in a van with a couple of other people and when we parked somewhere we all got out to examine where we were. It was bright daylight with an empty parking lot. There was one building in the middle of the empty parking lot which I thought was odd and it would appear the other people with me were all going in that direction. I follow them to the building and notice that I'm significantly taller than I originally am.

I was finding it difficult as well to walk on my two feet without almost falling. I manage to enter the building and immediately recognize it from the dream I had a couple of days ago. I became lucid and started running around in the building saying it looks exactly the same as before. I could see groups of people having conversations about something that seemed important. I went through the hallway and found myself inside an airport station now.

I notice a lot of people sitting down waiting for their flight to be announced. I stopped and began thinking I had goals for the next time I would be lucid but was struggling to remember what they were again. I took a pause and eventually gave up unfortunately and continued with the lucid dream. I talk to a few dream characters while they waited before the dream ended and I had a false awakening right after.

In a fresh house, I admired the view of the winding river out back. The river quickly flooded and it's shape slithered like a snake. I looked away to tell everyone to see the snaky river. When we looked out the window again the river was side winding it's way closer to the house. This was an impossible thing, the water lifted up like a tube of muddy liquid, to sidle closer to us. Everyone was scared. I shoved my finger through my palm. It went through but only with much force.

"This is a dream," I mentioned. No one believed me. I wanted to go confront the snake river but Kay ran up from the basement and said her brother was lost. We went down and encountered an MC Echer like scenario where rooms and hallways always lead us back to the main hall by the stairs. We could hear Kay's brother yelling but could not find him.

I wondered about the basement, was this a part of me that needed sorting? It all kept coming back to the same area. Suddenly Kay's brother walked out from a room and stood beside me. "Who made this basement, it's severely f-ed up." I felt kind of ashamed knowing this was a construction of my own, a reflection of myself. I sat and patted the bare, concrete floor. "Guess we'll have to fix it," I said, not knowing where to begin.

I stood up, determined to sort the situation out right away. And suddenly feeling God-ish in the dark and twisted bowels of the basement yelled, "Let there be light!" Nothing happened. I yelled the command again. Kay went over and flicked on a light switch. This made me laugh so hard that I think I lost lucidity. After this we wandered around the basement trying to map it out into a floor plan.

This is another early morning dream, between 5-6:30am
Success reality checking because of an impossibility in a dream.
I did fail to reality check in a different dream of a violent storm.
Sleep 6rs & 55 min.

In a strange city they sky grew quickly dark. Above, the clouds twitched unnaturally and formed into flat triangles, squares, rectangles, and hexagons. The shapes grew clear and looked like large slabs of sparkling ice drifting across the sky. Then, one triangle tipped and fell from the sky, it's sharpest point aimed at earth. It turned into a pyramid before it slammed into a skyscraper and smashed it flat.

The people scattered, screaming and weeping. I was too fascinated by the shapes in the sky to run. I watched as other shapes tipped and fell onto the city. I was afraid but could not tear my eyes from the sky. I had a feeling that if I fled, the shapes would find and flatten me. "A geometric storm!" I announced to no one. And then understanding that I was witnessing a storm I pressed my pointer finger to the palm of my hand. It slid through. I laughed.

Now knowing that this was a dream I watched the city be crushed by the shapes. The circles fell and became crystal clear cylinders that rolled through streets crushing everything in their path. I did nothing to stop the chaos until I saw two little children trying to outrun a cylinder. I leaped into the street between they and the giant rolling shape and braced myself for the impact. The cylinder evaporated before it struck me. I turned and the children were gone.

I wanted to see why the sky was making and throwing shapes at the earth. I tried to fly but couldn't. I tried a few times to run up the sides of buildings but couldn't. I rechecked a few times that I was still dreaming. Finally I found a smaller building to leap onto and then another taller building and leaped my way up to the tallest skyscraper still standing. I attempted to use the falling shapes to leap further up into the sky but they were falling to fast. I crashed down into the city.

Next I was being helped into a car. It was Sam and Dean from Supernatural. They threw me into the back of Baby and sped off. They pummeled me with questions which I tried to answer. When I told them it was all okay, this was a dream, they would not believe me. I reality checked again and even showed them that I could push my finger through my palm. They still would not believe.

Then, realizing that I could do anything, I imagined myself driving Baby. Suddenly there I was, speeding around in the Winchesters' beloved car. The guys were in the back seat. I got lost in the thrill of racing the car through the dreamscape.

I don't know if the dream ended or I lost lucidity, but I do not recall anything past joy riding.


Success reality checking to a storm and with confirmation reality checks.
This was an early morning dream, between 4:30 and 6:30am.
According to fitbit I had 7hrs and 45min sleep.

I was in school walking down the sidewalk of the building and going to the school's gym. As I walked in with other people the coach told me I wasn't a student. I nodded and began turning back to the entrance of the gym till she told me to wait. She said she wanted to pray for me and to stay in front of her while she did so. I agree with this and watch her as she begins the prayer.
At the end I do a cross symbol and thank her for it before leaving towards the entrance. Once I did I found myself in a grassy field.

I looked down at my hands and stated I'm dreaming and continue to walk through the field thinking about life. I started feeling my head pulsing loudly as if it was ringing. I eventually walk enough to encounter other people and notice families and children playing at the park.

I walked in to see what was at the top of the tree-like building that everyone was going towards. There was a bridge connecting others to get to it and it had curve stairs around the tree ascending higher. As I got higher from walking up the wooden stairs I eventually got hit by another person falling down and forcing me to fall down as well before waking up.

I woke up in my bed and wanted to check the time as I was surprised it was still dark and was wondering if I was in a false awakening. I heard the sound of water and felt odd till I woke up again.

deleted

The stars stood in strange formations that night. One was shaped like a calligraphic T laying on its side. Odd. "I better reality check," I mentioned more to myself than my companions. And yes, I was in a dream. Immediately and with (likely manic) excitement I tried to convince my co-workers. They laughed at me, and then, being counsellors and therapists, asked if I was under a lot of stress lately. "YES!" I said. "I like to fly when I get stressed out," I jumped into the air and drifted around them, spinning and bouncing on invisible bubbles of air. They told me to come down out of the sky, it was dangerous. They wanted me to face my issues instead of flying away from them. I kept telling them this was a dream, it's a dream, we're all dreaming. They would not believe me. Anger flared up inside me, I just wanted soar around the night sky with these creatures that I considered my friends. But they would not have it. I dropped down from the sky, grabbed one of them by the arm and yelled, "FLY!" I tossed her high into the air, effortlessly, and she drifted softly to the ground again. She ran away. I grabbed each of my co workers in turn and whipped them high into the air and yelled, "Fly damn it... just fly!" They hit ground and hit the road as well. I was left standing there, frustrated and alone. I shoved my finger through my palm to make sure I was still dreaming. I was. I tried to remember goals I had for when I became lucid but I could recall none. I ran, jumped into the sky and flew fast and hard, intending to fly my lucid way into a better dream.
I don't recall anything after this.

Dec 30 2022

December 28 2022
Humaniod giants stepped down from the clouds and trampled humanity. I ran for shelter underground in a library which had a deep basement. I smashed inside through a window. I ran down the stairs. When I passed a window in the stairwell I could still see above ground. The giants stomped closer. I ran faster down the stairs and came to another window in the stairwell. Again I could still see above ground outside. And the giants were even closer. I leaped over steps as rushed as quickly as humanly possible and came to another window. And yet again I could still see the outside world being destroyed. I had been in a similar situation before, trying to run for shelter in a basement that I can never reach. It's happened in dreams. I reality checked and yes, I was dreaming.
My fear gave way to curiosity. Who were the giants, really, and what did they want? I smashed the basement window, crawled out, and ran and leaped into a tree top, then to the next, then to the next. When I came to houses I effortlessly leaped from rooftop to rooftop. Then in the city from skyscraper to skyscraper until high up enough to face one of the giants. I called, "WHAT DO YOU WANT?" The giant thudded nearer and bent down to look me in the eye. In the reflection of the giant's eye, I looked like an insect. Disgust wrenched on the face of the giant, it raised a hand swatted at me. I was terrified for a spit second then repeated, "it can't hurt me... it can't hurt me..." as the massive palm smashed down upon me.
I woke.

This is the first journal entry where I am not using the formating from a really old journaling tool I used a long time ago. I woke up at 4:30 am and took 8mg of galantamine and 600 mg of alpga gpc. I ended this DEILD chain at around 7:00 am.

Moments after getting settled back into sleep I realized the dream was formed. The bed felt so real! I forced myself through the sleep paralysis and out of the covers to find myself in my bed in my childhood home instead of the bed I currently sleep in! I got up and it was very vivid. I went outside through the back door and tried summoning Juliana by reaching my hand back. I felt her hand and pulled it forward but it was disembodied which happens sometimes. I woke up and DEILD chained, each attempt the same thing would happen. One time I prefaced my attempt by saying, "Hello Juliana. Are you there?" and the voice that replied was all deep and distorted. (I think dream control is just something I'm going to need to practice now that I'm getting out of a dry spell.)

Later in the DEILD chaining I spent less time trying to summon Juliana and more time exploring the dream world. I went into my neighbors yard through their unlocked gate and suddenly felt like I had rocks or ice chips in my mouth. No matter how much I spit out there kept being more. It was a very uncomfortable sensation.

This was from Dec 22nd courtesy of my sleep deprived brain.

Fell asleep on the couch. I could hear the show playing, people talking, so assumed I was still awake. I felt weirdly heavy and wondered if I was sleeping, so tried to float off of the couch. I slipped sideways and woke.

I closed my eyes and listened to the show again, some old kung fu movie. The heaviness set in again and then came the snoring. My eyes popped open, I looked around. I was the only one laying, then it struck me, I was hearing myself snore. Dreaming again. I laughed at myself then tried to float upward. I couldn't do anything but lay and listen to myself snore. Could I make myself sleep talk? I struggled to say, "Can you hear me, I'm dreaming." I couldn't speak. I struggled so hard that I woke.

I sat up and looked around. The show was still playing. I asked the others if they heard me snoring and they laughed and told me to go to bed. 'Nope." I laid back down. As soon as I felt heavy I tried to float off the couch. I slid sideways and drifted to the floor like a fluff of feather. I landed on the floor slipped through. "Through the floor!" I yelled and grabbed the footrest of the chair beside me. "I'm bringing you with me," I told the chair's occupant, his feet dangled over the edge. But as I tipped the chair fully over, it was empty. I let go of the chair and fell into the basement. I woke.

I tried laying on my side. Fell asleep and kept telling myself I would become lucid again. A dream scene started suddenly. I was in a city with tall building and even taller statues of people One of the statues turned its head and smiled a giant stony grin. "Uh... I should probably check if I'm dreaming.." and did finger through palm check. And yes, I WAS dreaming. I strode over to the grinning statue and touched it's foot, its toe was nearly as tall as I was. The statue lifted it's bare foot and stomped on me. I woke.

I fell asleep again later but don't recall any other dreams from this night.

I had a false awakening. I awoke at a large army barracks type structure. Three or four story red brick building with spartan interiors and big mostly-flat mowed areas outside for training. This gives way to jungle, as the training compound is situated decently high on a mountainous region with tropical jungle growing over the land. I can see ocean off in the distance.

I was false-awakened by a large explosion. I head outside and see soldiers and men in white sailor uniforms running around. A large radio mast type structure has apparently fallen over a motorpool filled with fuel trucks and started a large fire during a training exercise. There are people on fire, burning rather gruesomely and others running to get help and medical nurses. It strikes me as odd that there are men in sailor uniforms though we seem to be many miles from the coast.

I become partially lucid. I don't think I was fully aware of the dream state, but I was aware that what I was experiencing was not real. I didn't think to stabilize or work on my goals, but I had some intuition about being a positive force on the dream. A sergeant comes over, he looks like sergeant hartman from full metal jacket and he starts yelling at me in typical drill instructor fashion for standing like an idiot and not helping the men that are burning. I turn to him, very calmly and say. "Its okay, this is a dream. Execute Rewind."

I see in my vision a few distorted bars, like when one rewinds a video tape. The tower rises back up into place and all the scattered people rapidly move backwards into their barracks, save for the squad that was doing jumping jacks originally when the tower fell. I look at the tower. It is very rusty, and looks overloaded with cell antennas and big white radio dishes. On some level the "lucidity" was in that I was actually watching an army movie. I think I unconsciously repaired it to a new state but I don't remember.

I then decided to fly. I pushed down, using my fire jets technique and began to lift slowly off the ground. I look down at myself and see that I am wearing one of the white sailor uniforms. i feel that my body is not myself and catch glimpses in the third person. It looks like Jak's physical form, heavily muscular and short blonde hair with paler skin. I also notice that while I am flying, the visual effect of the flames isn't there and I seem to be moving rather slowly. There is a sort of shimmering heat effect.

I am semi lucid and I have a weird way of doing this. I for some reason think about the animation vs minecraft videos and reach behind my back and manifest a minecraft command block. It is about the size of a tennis ball and feels like hard plastic with sharp corners.

"Toggle Enable Propulsion True" I say, mincing my words a little bit. A small window appears with pixelated text of what I have said and it flashes green. The flames appear in my hands and my flying speed and control increases considerably.

I begin flying over the forested mountains away from the base and heading for the sea. When I get close I slow down near where a small river lets out on a beach. I see palm trees but also these very alien looking trees. They are shaped like a deciduous tree but each branch ends in a large, thick paddle like leaf structure about three or four feet tall. It is thick and has volume like a succulent or cactus but no thorns. It is a bright green, slightly teal or blue near the center and yellow along the edge. These structures combine giving the treetop a sort of effect of looking like a large pine cone. I muse over how interesting the tree looks and think that I want to remember it when I wake up.

I continue flying. The dream opens up to an archipelago of mountainous islands covered in rainforest. It seems like it would be very beautiful but the detail and dream clarity make everything somewhat fuzzy and generic. I see a city and decide to explore it. It appears to only be the urban center. A compact zone of narrow streets around high rises of various architectural styles and roadways but very little urban sprawl. There is a "fakeness" to it, like it is simply something someone has built in simcity with cheat codes. I notice one building is obtusely, absurdly tall, going up through the clouds. It doesn't look futuristic, rather it looks like a normal modern skyscraper that has been stretched to be several miles tall. Despite the "fakeness" and lack of clarity I just see floor after floor, window after window going up and up. Though I dont count I can tell it is several hundred floors tall and reaches well above the height of most of the mountains.

I see dark foreboding clouds like an intense tropical storm approaching. I continue flying in that direction, not seeing them as an indication of a threat or trouble.

At some point I go explore another city which has a lot of the same features but a different layout. Right up to the single obtusely tall building albeit of a different architectural style. I fly up the side of the building, almost crashing into it and go into the clouds before emerging above them.