lucid

I was at my old job, walking around the back of the factory.

I was applying for a new job (possibly same dream). We have to fill out this complicated sequence of forms on these old computers with beige cases, CRT monitors and so on. They look like computers from the 90's. Me and the other applicants are getting confused because the forms arent labeled. One of the computers crashes and has to be rebooted, but the form doesnt come back up. I realize this is some kind of test and begin thinking to myself 'this sucks', I don't want to work here.

There are two people supervising our interview. One is this bureaucrat woman. She wears glasses, and her hair in a tight bun. While she is technically wearing a business outfit it is comically revealing, with her shirt unbuttoned showing the cleavage of a very pronounced bust and a very short skirt which is more or less only long enough to cover her bottom. She has dirty blonde hair and black heels on. I watch as she comes over and begins bending down to adjust her shoe and empty a small garbage can, getting too close to another applicant trying to fill out his form. The guy is trying really hard not to look at her. This goes on for a minute and the dude gets back to work on his form but the woman gets irritated and intentionally butt-bumps him. She then stands up straight, points at him and shouts at him for sexually harrasing her.

The other boss comes over. He looks like one of those old political cartoons where theres always some fat capitalist with a red face and fat body and tophat and suit eating a bunch of money or something. He then tells the guy that he has violated the sexual harassment policy and is going sue the guy for a large sum of money. I then question to myself 'what does this company even do?' and realize the answer is sort of vauge. I then realize that this seems very staged and they are probably running a scam on false sexual harassment claims. I tell the other applicants, and two of them agree. We leave to go out to eat together.

-+-

I am climbing the stairs in my old childhood home. I come to the top step and notice that the carpet is not what it was when I was a child. It is an off white material that is sort of made of small braided ropes. I also notice that the top step is somewhat wet. While I am climbing the steps I stop a few steps from the top and say to myself.

"Is this a dream? Yes. I just have to become lucid. I should do a reality check."

I preform a nose pinch reality check. It works exactly as expected. I am able to breathe through my plugged nose. I notice in my other hand I am holding a yellow plastic cup (one I used to drink from a lot when I was a kid). It is filled with water. Out of curiosity and possibly remembering it was a good way to score points in the lucid dreaming competition. I take a drink from it, and it tastes like slightly chilled water. I wake up, disappointed that I basically had a Layer 1 experience but happy that I managed some lucidity.

...

There is another dream. I am at a "hill climbing park". It feels like steep ski slope in the summer. A high grassy hill rises up in front of me with deciduous/coniferous forest on either side. Some ways up it splits providing two alternate routes and there are signs at regular intervals indicating how far up one has climbed. I climb the hill. I see another set of dream characters, a black man and his child. The child complains that climbing the hill is too hard, but his father is telling him its important to learn to take on challenges.

I keep climbing until I reach one of the signs and a sort of rest area where the slope flattens out. The sign is made of three scrap wooden boards on a single post and the information is painted on in drippy black paint, like a cartoony representation of a sign. The sign reads 98, though I don't remember if it is feet or meters.

The dream then goes third person. Near the top the grassy hill transitions to a steep ridge made of sand and sandstone, like the sand dune parks in michigan. A narrative voice is telling me there are a million places like this on earth and describing the geologic process involved in creating such hills. He then says that the soil here is bad and when people moved in and began building roads and buildings they would sink into the ground.

But modern engineers build buildings on wider foundations and build them higher than normal so they can sink slightly until they touch stronger layers, and then be at the level they were needed. When discussing this a portion of the hillside disappears and is replaced with roads and solar panels. The solar panels just seem to be laying on the ground. Then a small house comes in. It feels like new construction lacking paint or furniture on the interior.

The narration voice explains that he is a woodworker and makes handmade furniture in his spare time and a table appears. I (or at least my dream self's typical avatar) is sitting at the table. It is made of some kind of marbled brown texture, like petrified wood and looks very out-of-place in the bland room. Narration voice says it would be a good table to sit at when I go on a date.

"Heh. It would be funny if I dated the table"

A second table, a copy of the first but slightly smaller appears in another chair. Leaning in such a way two of its legs touch the floor and the other two touch the top of the larger table.

"Wait how did I make that happen? I must be dreaming."

Upon realizing that I am dreaming, I snap into my avatar body for a moment, then wake up.

NLD: x1 = 1pt
DILD: x2 =15pt
RC/Stabilization: x1=1pt
Eat/Drink Something x1=5pt

Total: 22

I am randomly lucid but I go with the dream plot which is something that has been happening
a lot lately
I am Batman and I am fighting Deathstroke. I win and take him prisoner in the bat cave. I try interogating him to find out who hired him.

Later his daughter Rose wants me to free him. I try to take her prisoner but she turns into a cat! I trap her in a box so that she can't turn back into a person. Not long after I wake up to my alarm.

After an emotional altercation I left my grandparents house. This emotional state causes me to realize I am dreaming

I tell myself "I'm dreaming" and at the same time my body starts to slightly levitate, I look down and see my Grandmas house and how incredibly high quality the dream is. I use this opportunity to take flight. I am in a residential neighborhood and my flight is rather uncontrolled for the first 5 to 10 seconds, flying at the same level as single floor house roofs. I notice my right leg is slightly hanging off though, and I use this to my advantage. I decided to use it like a control stick: when I moved it up I would go up and when I moved it down I would go down. Same for left & right. It wasn't perfect, my turning was not crisp at all and overall it was shaky -- but I had some level of control for a sustained flight.

I am still just flying trough the residential area, I see someone and immediately I start to come crashing down right towards him. I wasn't going fast, but fast enough that when I collided with the Dream Character and he must have flown like 10 meters from the collision site. His body flew trough some kind of a wooden structure as he almost disintegrated in to it. I look at him, slightly expecting him to just make it like all my DCs do since they appear to often be immortal, he didn't though. He was smoking from the friction and soon collapsed to the ground. Oh well,

At this point I look at my hands. It always has a nice grounding type effect on me, kind of like the concept of stabilization but not really. I notice that my left hands middle finger is about 90% missing, only a small stub being left behind. It looked so grabbable, so I did, and I just kind of pulled it. It didn't grow back, but I knew it didn't matter and that is why I spent only a few seconds on it.

I am no longer in a residential neighborhood, I am next to a dark wooden stable like structure completely closed off from my side of the building. I see a very small bolted drain hole, now I think what better idea than to unscrew those bolts and enter the hole as miniature me. So I go ahead with it, I unscrew those bolts, take off the cover and try to become small. I couldn't pull it off right then and there, and the drain hole just became smaller until it was basically completely sealed off. I didn't want to deal with this I thought to myself and I continue to explore the area.

It is all very similar. A farm like area with animal stalls right outside, there have must been 20 of these small square stalls right next to each other. As I'm walking right past these stalls I see that each one has a black dog laying inside. This place is ass, its bleak, empty, not pretty & completely gray with no color in sight. So I do the most logical thing /s, I summon a dream character and [EXPLICIT CONTENT] Ensues.

I have had a seemingly endless string of layer 0 and layer 2 lucid experiences in the past month. Most of which have been documented in my private DJ. Presently my main computer is out for repairs and my DJ archive is at my mum's house so I'm just going to post here. Conveniently this one is both lucid and doesn't pretain to anything personal so...

There was an earlier layer 0 dream. I think it involved being stuck on an island waiting for my father while vacationing somewhere. Then as I gained a sublte bit of lucidity I transitioned to speaking with Manei. She was asking if it would be possible to go surfing and skiing/snowboarding in the same day. This seemed to be in the continuity where she lived on earth in southern california and my response was "sure". One could go surfing in the morning then drive across the state into the mountains and go skiing in the evening. (A quick check of google maps says, yes, this travel arrangement would be very possible.)

-WBTB-

I was at my old childhood home, walking outside. I was occupying my dream body and headed out into a heavy mixture of rain and snow. Though I was wearing nothing more than boxer shorts. I reminded myself "its a dream, I can't actually be cold from lack of temperature." I could still feel the rain though, it was cold but not in a way that was unpleasant.

"Flight on. Maximum dream stability." I commanded.

I pushed downwards in my traditional manner and jumped into the air hoping to initiate flight. Despite my best efforts I only got a few feet off the ground before drifting back down. I had no visual of my fire jets either. I tried again, glancing down to either side trying to make the visual appear and get more practical use out of my flying method. This seemed to work as I got two or three meters off the ground before I began to drift back down to the ground. When I did I had the distinct and vivid sensation of my bare feet touching the cold wet pavement of the street. I remember wondering why the dream control had failed. It shouldn't have been because of the weather or environment, the first time I ever used my fire jets it was cold and humid like this.

Ultimately I resolved to simply conduct some other type of dream control. I remembered the next DV comp is starting in a day or two and that I should practice and I remembered the last time I scored a lot of points by changing sex in a dream. I thought that I should try and repeat that.

Before I could initiate the transition, The dream destabilized. I could tell I was waking up, but it destabilized in a very interesting way. I felt like everything was shrinking. The whole world shrank beneath my feet. Houses, trees, cities and the entire united states. I was drifting away from it as it and the moon shrank away beneath me. I was treated to a view of the solar system with the orbits of planets depicted as blue glowing lines. I managed to grab onto them with the effect of strings. They all stretched into teardrop shapes as I preverbially and literally held onto the dream. I reached with my other hand to grab the sun, a tiny yellow-white marble which was warm and tingly to the touch.

I wrote this during the night, so I mostly just recorded the lucid part in detail. I might elaborate more on the non-lucid later. The child-man-ape things were rather creepy, and might be worth sharing.
-------------------------------------------------------------

Up kind of late. It’s about 1:00 now. I took about 2mg of melatonin a bit ago.

2:30-2:48

WBTB, read some scripture, went to the bathroom, tried a bit of meditation.

4:30am

Dream Guide (Lucid)

Apes, and those four child-man-ape things. They want to attack me, bite me with their teeth. A monument that I think is not well constructed. Trying to sleep in the monument, then worrying about the cops waking me up. Guitar dog. Machine, which is my friend. It takes off down the road, and wrecks. I worry about someone or something being hurt. I go to see, and find that a couple of little animals seem to have been wounded. I feel it’s my responsibility to shoot them.
...I decide to hold off on shooting the animals until I look up whether or not they feel pain. Heading back out of the barn, I decide that I should do a RC for some reason. I do a nose pinch, and can still breathe. I’m dreaming! I think about how this is worth 10 points (possibly forgetting that the competition hasn’t started yet), and then think I should work on a task. What task? At first I think I try to find a place – I don’t remember what exactly. Having a bit of trouble finding it, and then I decide to try to find my dream guide. I start asking for the guide, or possibly saying something like “the guide is around the next corner”. Now I’m no longer in the barn, but in a larger building. I see someone up ahead. There is a short, but wide, flight of stairs leading to a corridor that runs perpendicular, and this is where the man is. I start chasing after him (there is something for a moment or two where there is someone else with him but I don’t know what becomes of the other guy) and catch up to him. He is a somewhat heavyset man, with a somewhat thin, sandy-colored beard. He is wearing some kind of shirt or jacket, I think, with words on the back. He has a kind of archaeologist feel to him, a bit of a cross between a couple of archaeologists I know in waking life and “Nigel” from the Jumanji movie.

“Are you my dream guide?” I ask.

“Yes, I guess so,” he replies.

My memory is a bit fuzzy here, and I might lose lucidity for a bit. I have a couple of business cards that I try to fish out of my pocket and give to him. He is looking for a site to do some archaeological work, and seems interested in a place where I worked once. I seem to regain some lucidity, I think I want the guide to teach me something. He responds by pushing me down a set of stairs. I get the feeling that there is something he wants me to learn on my own, and at this point he isn’t going to help me (at least in a micro-managing sort of way). I remember thinking that he got me out of somewhere (a backrooms type situation, or something).

Now I’m in a basement area. I seem to lose lucidity again. Someone is messing with an explosive – there is some chemical that makes people do weird things. I try to hide (with someone else?) while he sets off the explosive. Then there is something about going back in time, or trying again, to stop him. The solution is not to do something with the match as the man tries to light it. This makes him try to light it with a match that isn’t working as well (otherwise he would just start rubbing the now wood with his hand until it caught fire). Then I am able to stop him, although I think his hand and arm now look like a glowing, charred piece of wood. There is a large freezer nearby, and we go in. There is some conversation about whether or not I remember smells and such (maybe – the memory is kind of fuzzy). He seems to be hallucinating. He is also a reflection in a large mirror now, and is naked. I take the mirror out of the freezer, and out to where the burning stuff was. I think maybe the transition from the cold to the heat might cause the glass to crack, which it does. I think I drop the mirror. It falls backwards to the ground, and shatters. I worry that this might have been the only way to access my dream guide, but someone nearby says something about that not being the case.

Elaboration on the Child-Man-Apes

There were some people, possibly scientists. Actually, Charles Darwin might have been there. I get the idea that they may have been discussing evolution. They were going to do some test with an ape, involving it putting boards/shingles up against the wall of a cabin. I seem to be involved in some way. I think the ape attacks me. It is as though I've done something wrong, and as a consequence I'm now under attack not only by the ape, but by four creatures. These creatures look like a cross between large children, or sickly adults, and chimpanzees. They come after me, trying to bite at me. I seem to recall the thought of their teeth biting me was specifically repulsive. I think I go hide somewhere, also trying to sleep, possibly. But there is still that creepy thought that the creatures will find me. This might be where I come across the guitar dog - which is a sort of cross between a guitar and a dog. I really like this dog, and lay there petting it. It has some weird gelatinous thing lining the outside of its stomach. This eventually becomes a machine, I think, about the size of an automobile and with a couple doll-like pieces. I treat this like it is living. When I turn around and go back to where I had been laying, it moves away on its own and starts off down the street. I chase after, worrying that it might hurt someone. It does, in fact, wreck. When I show up to the scene, it appears that it has injured some small deer or rabbit-like things. I feel responsible for putting them out of their misery, and have a shotgun with me. I don't want to, but I feel like I should put them down. I try to catch, them, and go into a barn looking for them. This leads into the dream above...

Up at about 4:30AM for a WBTB. No recall from earlier in the night. I've just taken the supplements below for the first time. I'll be back to record later. First impression: Choline smells terrible. Like fishy terrible.

Update: Laid in bed for a long time. GF's regular weekday alarm went off by mistake a couple times and messed up my rhythm. Eventually I relaxed enough to start feeling WILD vibrations. I got all the way through the process of "going through the wormhole", and I could see a dream in a tiny pinhole at the end. It was my childhood home. I could see my old PC monitor with Runescape on it, but the dream was black around the edges. I forgot that I needed to 'grab' the dream and I missed my opportunity.

I find myself in my bed and I think to do a nose RC. I can breathe through my nose so I know I'm dreaming. I start to rub my hands together, spin, and demand that the dream stabilize. It doesn't do much, and it feels very unstable and groggy. I try to leave my bedroom but the dream fades. I have a few more false awakenings with similar results. At one point I did spin and see some marked improvement in quality, but not enough to try and pursue a dream goal. I was trying to go to a forest and explore the dream environment.

I'm in something similar to a fast-food restaurant playscape. There is a pool resort nearby. Sunny day and all that. Looks like a dope vacation spot actually. I'm crawling through the tube tunnels, and eventually come out the other side. There is a group of people playing the upcoming Zelda title, Tears of the Kingdom, on an outdoor TV setup. It is lagging really bad. I'm upset about it being this bad. I wake or otherwise recall nothing beyond this point.

Regarding the supplements. I did notice a bit of a headache during the attempt (and now still), as well as some stomach discomfort. I felt my heart beating faster but that is most likely attributed to the WILD experience itself. Nothing earth-shattering but thought I should note it.

Hoping for better results next time. I will say that this is the first time in a long time that I've actually felt the WILD vibrations, tiny victories I guess.

Supplements: Primary Trigger Combination (1st Attempt)
Galantamine: 8mg
Choline Bitartrate: 250mg

Default = Commentary
Blue = Dream
Green = Lucid

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

At my gate. I see a goat running on the hill in front and then a horse behind my parking lot. I also notice the gate is not well closed, so I close it tight. My dogs are jumping around me excited. Then I check the fence and find a couple spots where the fence is lose as if someone damaged it on purpose. I scramble to fix it before my dogs see it, but they go through a hole they find. First Soraia, but I yell at her and she promptly comes back. Then Maya and Tara also escape. I manage to call back Maya, but Tara encounters a black dog about her size, they become friends and she ignores me. They roll on their backs on the ground, clearly getting along. I then notice the road ahead is loaded with huge snakes coming their way. I call Riverstone for help and he goes outside the gates to get the dog but I warn him about the snakes.
Then the dream fades and I almost wake up but hold on to it and then I am at some kind of small room, laying on a bed, belly down. I know I am dreaming so I plunge my hand into the foam mattress as a reality check and grab some foam as if is it cotton candy and eat it. I expected some crazy flavor, but it actually tastes just like foam. I then get up and go through the wall. End up in someone elses apartment and then go from room to room not knowing what to do. I briefly panic when I realize I don't know the way back to my room. Then I recall again that it's just a dream and there is no point in going back to "my" room. I go out to a balcony. Below the balcony on the street I see many kids and adults looking festive. I plan to jump through the pavement below and see where it takes me. I jump flat on my belly but as I approach the ground I see it is covered in animal poop, so I stop an inch from it and just levitate there for a second. Everyone looks at me. I lay my feet on the ground and stand. Immediately see a group of people on horse back coming towards me in two lines side by side. They don't stop for me, so I quickly lift off again not to be trampled upon. As I watch from above I think it may be some parade, but then notice the outfits and lots of famous Hollywood actors walking around and conclude that it must be a movie set.
I want to focus on something productive and stop just moving around, so I sit cross legged on top of a wall to try to meditate. I invoke my guru and ask for his guidance and teachings. Immediately I get attacked by some guy out of nowhere, jumping and trying to reach me to harm me, his face full of anger, as if he is possessed. I kinda expected that, but still it is annoying every time it happens. I transport myself to a room full of plushies, hoping it will be peaceful to meditate in there. I try again and invoke my guru, but the plushies start flying and hiting me. I deflect them with energy from my hands, but att some point they come alive and gain shark teeth and bite me. I try to ignore the pain and carry on, aware that it is still all just a dream, but I almost wake up.
I then find myself in what appears to be an island and in front of me there is a strange asian looking tower. I get this feeling that I will find my guru there, but when I reach the front door, it is controlled by thugs and they won't let anyone in that is not vetted by them. I plan on just flying up but then I notice there is some sort of elevator on the side, the kind of those for window cleaners and is starting to go up so I hold on to a side and just go up hanging from it. It takes me all the way to the top but then I see no way to access the interior of the building and there is no way to get down from the roof either. It is also inclined and slippery and I almost fall. Again, I wonder what to do next but a sudden water rise out of nowhere covers everything below and it keeps rising until it reaches the roof and leaves me isolated on my own little island. I go around the roof and find a stone path that magically appeared over the water, so I walk it through. It leads me to dry land. I find myself in what looks like some city in Latin America. It's night now, but the streets are flooded with people panicking and running in all directions. On the tv of some eatery, I see a broadcast about some impending catastrophe. I think I also see something big in the night sky but can't tell what it is. I wake up.

I did WILD and the first thing I did was take a deep breath and stabilize. To stabilize, I rubbed my hands together while narrating it out loud. I remember noting that my hands were very humid. After that, I tried spinning around, which seemed to work. Finally, I think I did a pushup or something.
After my dream was somewhat stable, I tried summoning a dream character using the revelation technique, and it didn't work. I don't think I put enough effort in it though. I might have been rushing because I didn't trust my dream. I notice that my WILDs tend to be shorter than my DILDs. Much shorter. My DILDs can go like 15 minutes without me stabilizing, but my WILDs last less than 5 with stabilization.

I wanna try licking things. There's untapped potential in my sense of taste.

I did WILD but woke up very quickly.

I looked outside my window and it was a blood moon. That’s already weird, but then the clouds and sky started moving in an impossible way. Almost like they were connected to a background that someone was swimming side to side. This tipped me off and I became lucid but immediately woke up, not due to any excitement. I simply woke up because of how shocked I was, I guess.

So I decided to try having some Mugwort tea last night and had a bizarre lucid as a result.

I was in a dream, I don't remember the details of it, when suddenly I realized I was dreaming. I began to feel myself waking up so I repeated "this dream stabilizes" until suddenly an eye formed out of the darkness. It scared me but I stayed calm and continued repeating the phrase until a full scene materialized. I was looking at myself laying in the bed in the darkness like there was a giant mirror right in front of me. Both of my eyes were scarily wide. The suddenly I felt like I got sucked out of my bed into a vortex and then I was flying. What followed was a fast paced barrage of changing scenes, many of which I don't quite remember. I remember one where I wanted to go underwater and suddenly I was. A group of mermaids swam past and for some reason I decided the last one should become evil. She did and turned around and attacked me. I also remember a scene on a treetop with three giant frogs and me eating one, thinking it would taste like "meat" (whatever that means) but it tasted like nothing.

Oddly enough, despite most peoples' reports on Mugwort, this lucid actually felt less vivid than some of my previous ones. It felt like some of my actions weren't my own and I remember wanting to wake up at one point because my dream-logic mind thought "this is boring, lucid dreaming isn't as interesting as I thought it was". It almost felt like it was someone else's thoughts and actions, even though I was lucid. Part of the haziness could potentially be contributed to the fact that I had this dream only 1 1/2 hours after I went to bed, which is the first time I've ever had a lucid that early into the night. Maybe because the REM cycle was shorter than the morning ones it made for a less vivid dream.

I think I would try Mugwort again, but next time I think I might try it with WBTB so I can see how it affects my early morning REM cycles. Hopefully next time it will allow for a longer and more vivid lucid, rather than one where I don't feel like myself.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

At some victorian house, sort of half asleep and seeing the scenario fade away, but I realize it is actually a dream and that it is the dream itself that is fading. I hold on to it, but the darkness doesn't go away and I know this is when sometimes the monsters come up. And then I see a woman coming over and whenever she crosses a more shadowy area, her face becomes monstruous. I warn a friend that is also sleeping nearby to wake up. She doesn't know what I am talking about and she looks at the woman. The woman says in a hypnotic tone "look into my eyes". I grab my friend and say "don't look, it will kill you". I get in front of the woman and I say assertively "Now, you look into my eyes!" at the side of her face that is not disfigured. She looks puzzled and loses a bit of her power temporarily, so I open some curtains to let light in and I drag my friend to the outside. The woman still tries to reach me, but she can't stand the light. I decide to lift off and that's when I go fully lucid. I don't know what to do, so I decide to just watch the dream. Below me it now looks like some big american city. I also see a huge roller-coaster in the distance. There is some retro vibe to it. I just amuse myself by flying over people and watching their dramas. I feel very melancholic thinking how all these people are just DCs. I sing and dance in the sky above them.

Visiting my mom at her old job at the Union. They are at some warehouse with piles of boxes with files and lots of stickers, calendars and other stuff I used to steal from them and collect as a child. I am mesmerized by all the retro things they have, not fully aware that I am dreaming, but aware I am seeing something gone from the past. I grab a box with some stickers to take with me as mementos. For some reason my dog Hachi appears and all is fine until someone else also comes in with 2 dogs and a baby. I grab Hachi immediately and try to take him somewhere where I can keep him isolated. Unfortunately there is only a small room with no windows and I don't want to lock him there. So when the other dogs follow us and we get cornered there, I close them inside instead and take Hachi away.
We go to my mom's and he roams around the house free. After a while I am looking for him and find him in the balcony injured with a bad open wound in his front right leg. Nearby is a robotic snake I keep as a toy, also severely "hurt". Turns out she can bite and it is a powerful metallic bite. I try getting close to him, but he cowers and hides his leg. I go get hydrogen peroxide and throw copious amounts on his wound. He ends up accepting my treatment and even puts his front legs over mine to thank me, I guess. Then I also want to help the snake but need something to grab it safely. I didn't know she had such a dangerous self defense mechanism.

At my childhood home, alone, and I become lucid. I go into my room, honestly just wanting again to dwell on the melancholic feeling of seeing things from my past. But then I feel crazy horny and feel the urge to remove my pants. I look around for objects I might use creatively, but all I see is a wooden spoon over the bed for no good reason. So I give up on objects. Instead I decide to experiment what it would feel like if my clitoris grew to become a very long penis. Long enough that it reaches my mouth. And then I suck it. I almost wake up with the sensation but I manage to come back to the dream. Then I jump scare when through the balcony door I see 3 Rinpoches sitting outside. They are not looking at me, they are to right side, almost out of sight. I can only see a bit of their faces but I recognize them ckearly. They are facing forward as if listening or watching someone to my left side. I pull my pants up quickly, deeply embarassed, hoping they didn't see that. I get up and walk slowly towards the balcony sliding doors. Then they turn their heads towards me and nod at me wtth a smile. As I approach, I see many more of them and recognize almost all of them. Then some more pass by from my left side and disappear behind the ones sitting. The balcony is no longer a balcony, but some room somewhere else. They all aknowledge my presence, nod and smile, but none says a word. Then I walk forward a few more steps and I see my teacher to my left. He is standing there and he is the one all others were looking at or listening. They hint that I should come in and I do. Rinpoche comes to me and we immediately hug. Then we kiss. It is a shy confused kiss, because I want to kiss him on the lips but I am not sure if it is ok, so I kinda go for the cheek but still touch his lips. He seems surprised but pleased. We continue hugging. Then he kisses me on the lips properly. It feels incredible and totally real. We continue hugging tight and saying how much we missed each other, while I caress his back and head. I can even feel the smooth edges of his robe on his back and do my autistic thing of stimming by feeling the calming texture of the seam.
Then he moves on and we are in some kind of library or classroom and I realize we need to get out because a class or lecture is about to start. Lucidity fades a bit from here. Outside he is with his entourage and they are heading to some place to lunch with, but he specifically says to his attendant that I am to have lunch with the more private group and sit by his side in the upper room. The restaurant is asian, but I can't tell from which country. Rinpoche and the private group disappear upstairs as I am distracted looking at the food they have on display. Then I am not allowed to come up. When finally that is cleared up, I arrive there, but Rinpoche has disappeared again, maybe to go to the bathroom or something, I think. The people there look me sideways and want me to sit me at the "kids" table. I see three empty seats and figure that's where Rinpoche will sit so I say I think I am supposed to sit there to, but they mock me and bully me. Some lady is being incredibly rude and gets into my nerves, so I bang my hand on the table, wanting to punch her, and say "one of these seats is for me, just wait and see". But I feel bad for my ego outburst, so I just go and sit at a bench near the window, at the far end of the table, but where Rinpoche can see me when he returns. Then we hear his voice on loud speakers, interviewing some indian fella and it is about Russia and some allegory with volcanos and people wonder what is this about.

I was experiencing deja vu in till it click to me I was in a dream. I appear to be in a emerald like room with granite flooring. Through the large windows I could see the city. It was quiet, I could tell the dream was strong due to how grounded I felt and visually clear everything was. I tried to phase outside the window but it was solid and made me think "Wow this is exactly like real life"

I began to say I'm lucid dreaming to not forget that I was due to how realistic everything was. I continue saying and made another attempt to go through the building and this time I went through by going under the window. I began to fall down in till I hit the road. For some reason the dream was telling me I was in Washington dc. I made another attempt to fly and as I am in the air I smiled and was happy the sun was out. I realize that it was a high jump rather than staying the in air.

I began to thinking negatively and remember that I wasn't having a great day in my waking life currently. I then saw the sky change to semi darkness. I didn't want to ruin this moment in the dream so I close my eyes and as I'm falling down I wake myself up.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

I am between sleep and wakefulness and I hear my dogs barking outside, when suddenly I wake up with the sound of my front door slamming and I feel scared. I am confused and think that the only other person in the house is my mother on the ground floor and she would not go outside in the middle of the night for any reason, which worries me even further. Then I actually wake up and realize most likely no one slammed the door and also that my mother isn't in my home at all, it is Riverstone who is sleeping downstairs and I just had a false awakening. My dogs are also quiet, so I don't know if them barking was also part of the dream.

With Riverstone on a van going up a road and the engine is not managing to pull it up. He is driving and he steps on the accelerator to try to reach the top of the hill, but on a curve he loses control and the van rolls over to the side of the road. As we tumble, it gets dark and Riverstone loses his consciousness. I shake him hard and he doesn't wake up. I am really worried. When he finally does, we are in bed at my mom's house and he asks me why am I shaking him up like that. I am confused and tell him about my dream. He says that I am just remembering a traumatic event and I say no way, I don't recall it ever happening in the past. He says it did, we had that accident. I feel more confused about what's real or not. Then we go to the kitchen for a snack as he says now he is angry and we reheat some pizza on the microwave. I think about how I would never eat pizza in the middle of the night, but I am starting to feel maybe none of this is real, so what the heck, I actually eat some and ask for more. Then my mom comes and asks what's going on, I tell her the whole story and continue to chat while eating. Then I am worried we might wake up grandma and mom says "you're really confused, she passed away some time ago, it's just us here". Then I realize once again I am still dreaming all this. Then we are at a fair, where we volunteer at a booth. It is a mix between art display, book sales and alternative medicines. I am rearranging some books on a table and again confused about what's real or not, when some friends come over from another booth and I tell about my confusion and the whole accident story and that I can't even remember my best friends' names. They show some concern, but then some wild boar enters the place running and causing much damage, until he gets killed and someone takes it outside to the back of the building and leaves it on the ground temporarily. I go take a look at it soon after and some dog like a Husky is trying to eat the boar. He is making a mess so I shoo him. He doesn't like and attacks me. He actually looks more like a wolf now. I climb some structure to get out of its reach but it is not enough, the dog or wolf jumps high and almost bites me. I stop it with my arm and a sort of punch to its head, which beheads the animal. The animal's head falls to the ground and the rest of the body vanishes completely. I am in shock and that's when I realize I must be dreaming. So I lift off flying up and as I leave the ground, I realize I am inside some giant barn like structure. But I try to get rid of logic and let my mind roam free, so when I reach the ceiling, it just inverts and then there is like a second barn upside down. I enter some sort of backroomy dimension with buildings growing upside down and sideways and I just go through them and through wooden walls, ceilings, etc, just trying to get lost in the nonsense, not trying to make it right, trying to make my mind maleable. Then end up in a version of my own attic, but looking like a 60s lounge, with lots of yellow pillows and puffs on the floor. I plunge again in the wooden walls and this time I end up floating in a void for while, almost waking up. After a few seconds I start seeing the inside of the wood in big detail, as if magnified or if I shrunk to microsize. I don't feel my body, just my head, so I feel an urge to lick the surface with my tongue and it feels scaly. Then I am in a regular room but decorated in cluttercore style. There are so many carpets, plushies, curtains, pillows and all sorts of colorful bric-a-brac all over. I feel compelled to just admire it all. I realize my mind is trying to distract me with stuff, lots of stuff, but I indulge for a while. I go from room to room and each one is crazier than the other. Some rooms I need to go up or down through some wall mount ladder to reach the next room. I then see a box of jewels and a mirror in a small cozy bedroom and can't help trying them on, feeling that I am falling for the temptations to distract me. When I look in the mirror, I look absolutely goddess like. For fun I make the jewels, hairstyles and hair color change. Then I remember that often when I look at myself in the mirror in dreams, my face starts shifting and becoming mosnter-like, so I decide to take control of the process and just cause it myself, to fight that fear. My face slowly melts and I become ugly, my eyes all dark, fangs, messy hair. It makes me feel uneasy, but not terrified, because I am in control. I think about meditating next for a while, but I wake up.

I was in bed with my husband and I was telling him about my twin sister who is an actress. The room looked just like our room irl. my twin played catwoman in the latest batman movie. [the perspective shifts to 3rd person of the movie im explaining] I was explaining to him that I am worried she is into some very evil things since if you look closely at the frames in the movie you can see some weird messages hidden. The perspective zooms in on one of the perfume bottles in catwoman's vanity titled 'I eat little babies'. It was housed in a very luxurious crystal bottle whith the lettering done in cursive gold imprint. The bottle was among many others on a glass shelf. She finishes getting ready for a gala that she and batman are attending. She is wearing a beautiful flowing gown but she still has her cat woman mask on. The gala is hosted in a large rococco ballroom and is quite crowded. they climb up some stairs which are supposed to contain some occult symbolism but I forgot what it was. [perspective shifts back to me explaining this to my husband] I am worried that the batman actor is leading my sister in a very dark direction. After I tell him this he is stone-faced which makes me worry that he is in on it too. He looms over me and grabs my side very painfully which wakes me up.

[i fall back asleep] .....

realize im dreaming and the dream falls into a white mist. I try materializing something by yelling out 'Dream, give me more clarity' and 'Dream, bring me my twin from the previous dream'. a somewhat human form appears but it is very hazy. I end up losing lucidity eventually.

.......

I am at work as a teaching assistant in the dream. The school is large with a modern, open floorplan. The classroom has a beautiful design where one wall is full of windows to the park outside, the opposite side is open to the hallway, and the cieling has a curved '~' shape. The kid's tables are arranged around a shelf where the kids can grab materials like paper scissors etc. I dont remember the situation too well. I wanted to grab one of the covers to a CD case since I needed it for something and I assumed it would be fine since the teacher had told me i can grab anything from the shelf. As i go to grab the case the teacher yells out 'No! do not take my cd cases!' ....... I am in the front office ready to clock out but one of the front office girls is having trouble applying to something using a PDF application. I tell her that she should be able to apply online using the school district's wesite. They have a 'jobs' page where you just have to fill your info in online. I tell her that is how i applied to my job and one of the older office ladies says she did the same.