lucid

January, 2014

review: multiple car dreams, a new reality check, lucid

From the Theatre
I'm at the theatre and the show just finished. I walk out with my friend and she heads for the subway, wait, there's a metro in SA? I was so excited about the metro! But I didn't know which was my stop.

The train is approaching and my friend says "That's my ride. Are you getting on?"

I wanted to, but then I realized I'm holding keys.

"No thanks, I have my ride!" I jingle my keys and say goodbye. I walk outside, but I'm downtown and no where near a parking lot. Where the hell did I leave my car? I walk around for awhile but this is just making me really anxious. Where's my car?

I decide to skip all this silly walking and just close my eyes and WILL my car to appear. I tell myself "when I open my eyes again I'll be at my car!". I knew I could do that but I wasn't quite lucid.

Like magic I'm at my car. It looks weird and different. But whatever, I get in and start driving home.

Car Smashed
Because of some adventure dream I can't remember, my car has been smashed by the bad guy. Something to do with my car flying out a building window.

But that was then and this is now! I walk out the grocery store with my bags and its started to rain. The rain feels real. The puddles pooling by my feet feel real. I really thought I was awake. But when I get to my car I'm horrified.

My car is squished. Exactly the way it was from that dream. I'm flipping out! "My dream became real!" My mind was racing! "This means if anything bad happens in a dream, it happens for real?". I didn't want to believe it! I kept walking around my poor squished car.

Well, at least she drives.

Reality Check
I made a left turn. Even though I was in the right lane. Even though a car from the left lane was going straight. Even though the light was red?? What? That makes no sense.

I'm needing to drive forward but now my car has a mind of its own and turns. What is going on? I park at some random strip mall and it finally dawns on me. This driving makes no sense because I'm dreaming!!!

Happy to be lucid, I take off my shoes and start to fly! I begin my dream goal, but moment later I black out. My dream goes fuzzy, weird, non-lucid and abstract.

Okay everyone im new here but i have been a lucid dreamer since november 2013 i think or october not sure but, i dont really want to talk about my previous dreams cause i don't remember alot of them i remember a few which i would keep to my private dream journal kinda (sexual) EPICNESS.
Okay i attempted WILD when i woke up this morning it kinda failed not really but it lasted only for a few minutes good ones.
I have a crush on a girl so this might induced the dream scene i was in.
FRAGMENT:
Well pretty much i was trying to WILD and it happened after a few minutes (im really good at it) i was in a dream scene with the girl from my class and we were laying beside each other in a coffin & panic a bit but i notice she's alive and dream suddenly ends.STUPID ALARM.
NOTE:
That is from this morning i might tell you some stuff from my DREAM WORLD and city I created,epic experiences if i get time to do it i have school and job and life.

Failed DEILD

In the dream I'm in a house with two families. There is a flood about to hit us. I tell everyone to remain calm and collect any items that are important to them, and they all walk off. I go outside where concrete steps lead down to the street. I see the water rushing past the houses at the far end and I take a step back, preparing myself. As the water flows up the steps I push it back with my telekinetic powers, but it keeps coming. I continue pushing it back, becoming a little bored.

I wake and haven't moved or opened my eyes. The dream is still fresh in my mind. I focus on the predominant emotion of the dream (softness), and I feel myself going back into the dream. I end up pushing the sensation and it disappears.

False Awakenings (WBTB and MILD)

I have five successive false awakenings. In the first two I'm in sleep paralysis and attempt to move into a lucid dream, but end up back in bed. In the third my body is again vibrating but there is something threatening beside my face. After a few seconds of trying to talk to it I wake up. In the fourth I sit up and see my dog is on my bed eating a toilet bowl clip-on. In the last false awakening I sit up and begin writing in my dream journal. I then become lucid, but after a few seconds the dream collapses to a point and I wake into WL.

Not to forget to put it in here - will probably edit in some more:

Breakthrough - I managed to play darts lucidly!!

Last night, I got lucid - was in a house - did nose-plug - and then pretend-remembered like - yeah, they have a darts-room with board and arrows and everything next door - I saw it (pictured it shortly in my mind)!
Went in that room - and there everything was!
Not my original darts - I shortly even wondered, if I had dreamt the oche correctly..
But everything felt natural.
Unfortunately - my memory is a bit hazy - and I do not know, what I hit.
I believe I was happy with just being able to throw at all - maybe four times - with darts, that felt natural - and they went into the board, like they should, I think - with a proper ballistic arc and a thud.

This was one of those rare lucids that I had without employing WBTB. Some pre-bed MILD work did the trick! (Edit: Almost forgot -- thanks to Art for psyching me up to have an LD yesterday! Totally helped.)

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #183: The Inventor

I’m sitting on a park bench, working on plans for an invention. It’s some kind of very high-end computer device and I’m drawing up some tweaks for making it much less expensive and bringing it to the mass market. I’m writing all of these plans with pencil on a rectangular, shiny piece of green plastic.

A woman wearing workout tights jogs by. She looks great and I blatantly stare at her. I become dimly aware that I shouldn’t be staring at people and start to wonder what’s making me act this way. It dawns on me that I’m dreaming.

I get up from the bench and look out over the park that I’m in. It’s grassy, dotted with trees, and maybe 200 feet further on is a brick building that looks like a schoolhouse. There’s a low stone wall behind me. To my left there’s a street with a few cars driving down it.

I’m convinced that it’s a dream but everything is so vivid that I feel a little worried. One of my contacts feels like it’s drifting in my eye and my vision shifts just as if this had actually happened. Now I try drawing on the green plastic with my pencil and I’m able to scratch out persistent lines that look completely convincing.

I wonder whether I’ve finally confused waking life for the dream world. I feel some paranoia settle over me, but I dissipate it by drifting back and forth over the grass without taking a step. Okay, yes, definitely dreaming. I cap it off with a nose pinch reality check and I feel settled again.

Now I see Wife and my oldest son E approaching me from the direction of the schoolhouse. They look completely realistic and again I fight the unsettling sense that I’ve confused reality for a dream. I hit another nose pinch to settle myself down. How can everything look so real?

A huge, lean brown dog approaches us. His head is as high as my chest. It’s the first surreal thing I’ve seen in the dream so far. Wife is focused on rummaging through E’s schoolbag and doesn’t acknowledge that the dog is here.

The dog starts to growl and bark at us, approaching uncomfortably close. Wife and E don’t react. “You see that dog, right?” I ask them.

“Sure,” says wife nonchalantly. I don’t want the dog bothering my family’s DCs so I offer him my left forearm. He bites down on my arm and whips his head back and forth. I’m sure there’ll be no pain, though, and of course there isn’t.

After a moment of this, the dog lets go, sits down, and starts panting. He seems friendly now and I'm almost glad he's there. It helps make me sure that this is all a dream. Wife finishes up with E and we walk together past the low stone wall as the dream ends.

NON LUCID
*Me and my girlfriend along with some DCs held hands as we around in a marry go round fashion to change are location.
*Upali was being basketball with the abbot of the Vietnamese getting pleasure out of beating him.
*I started to make out with this sexy girl. Then she turned to me and said, I am going to fuck the shit out of you!
*Worked at a office where micheal peel was the boss.
*My grandfather is a Buddhist monk debating with someone on a topic.

LUCID
*I was in a place that seemed to be china. There were two chinese kids around me.
The area was beautiful. It was like a huge lake with lotus everywhere that you jump from one to the next. I wasn't that lucid in this dream so I didn't take full advantage.

I was having some non lucid dream that I can no longer recall all that well that involved me walking home from school. The dream may have been along the lines of an anxiety dream because I was counting on a friend to get my backpack for me; I had left my back pack at the tech school.
So I was walking home and taking a rather strange route, past the large blue factory near the edge of my town. There is a path that runs by it in RL, but in the dream, the path was broken, there were pits and valleys. It looked as though some construction work was being done on the factory.
I also took note that there were a large amount of gardening supplies, there were some plants in trays and saplings that looked as though they were ready to be planted. Perhaps the factory was looking to be environmentally friendly. I try to get through this part with out stepping on any flowers.
I get back on the path and it normals out a bit. I get to the end, where my subdivision would start, but this does not look like my subdivision at all. I may also note the seasonal difference. In my home state it is winter, but in this dream it was summer. The subdivision I was in looked something like mine, but the layout appeared different.
I get lucid here, for no reason at all!. For a moment I was excited. In getting lucid I had just completed my goal of 8 lucid dreams this month. (And in the 11th hour too.) But here we are.
I took a right off the path and began walking down the street. I rubbed my hands together and said to myself "stabilize dream."
I tried to execute some voice commands, but they didn't work. My voice sounded rather strange too, like that clip of the "only thing we have to fear is fear itself speech." I didn't care. Also, I felt like I was wearing a cloak. I caught glimpses of a hood in my peripheral vision and had long black sleeves on.
I also took note of one thing that I have never heard before in a dream; birdsong. And it was beautiful.
I got to the end of the street and arrived into some kind of cul-de-sac. I felt a strong wind blow in out of the forest in front of me. And an even stronger gale blow from behind. After a moment, I realized that what I was experiencing was not wind, but rather gravitational shifts.
I then had a gravitational shift that pushed me downwards. I was pinned to the ground and unable to move. And I came up with a rather... Interesting means of trying to get the gravity back to normal. I held my hands behind my back and manifested a headset microphone. I put it onto my head and asked whoever was on the other end to please lower the gravity to 10% of what it was.
For a moment, I was able to stagger to my feet. But another wave of gravity slammed me back into the pavement. This actually felt somewhat painful. I felt as though I was being dragged backwards along the pavement. Also, with all this going on, it was difficult to hang on to the idea of lucidity.
I went on the headset again, and asked whoever was there to please make the gravity 1% of what it was. One more, I was able to get to my feet for a second. Then a gravity wave flew past me and tore the headset off of my head. It flew in front of me then looped around behind my head and flew off into the sky.
The gravity slammed me back into the ground. I was laying on my back now, looking up. I saw there was a dark patch in the sky where the moon was supposed to be, but it (now this is the strange part.)
The moon looked as though it had been carved into shapes. I can recall the shape very clearly, there were three feline forms, though they looked to be standing on their back legs. They all had long hair as if they were human girls and had taken fighting poses. I could tell it had a sort of anime styling to the outline.
"Okay, the moon has three cats."
Gravity returned to normal and the design in the sky faded. I got the feeling that whatever had shifted gravity like that was trying to get that message across. Now they are done, and I am free to experience my dream as I wish.
I walk back up the street I came about two houses, then make a right down another street. I am stabilizing as I go, paying attention to how my feet feel as they hit the sidewalk. Am I wearing shoes? socks? I can't recall now.
I can't help but feel that I am alone, there are no other dream characters. Just as I do, I hear a man's voice.
"Hey! Hey you!"
About two houses away, a man is stepping outside. Then, across the street, another two houses away a group of three kids come outside, along with what looks like their nanny.
I continue walking and go past the man. I look at him and think "he's a dream character, just a fragment of my own subconscious, not a real person." And after I thought that to myself, I got really really lucid. I thought about the "5 layers of a lucid dream and thought about going to layer 4. Maybe I'm already at layer 4, I just haven't made any changes yet.
"You guys are dream characters and I am your dreamer!"
The man and the nanny gave me these really kind looks and they nodded. The kids jumped up and down with excitement. They ran over to me and asked me if I wanted to play [some game].
"No, you know what, I have a better idea!"
The kids look a little confused.
"I am going to teach you guys how to fly."
The kids look very confused.
I kneel down on their level.
"You need to focus the energy in your own body, your chi."
I demonstrate by doing my old flying method (I guess that's not fire, but chi.) and lift off, thrusting up with these cyan-ish flames. I start to slowly rise up above them, and the kids follow. The three kids instantly seem to get it, one kid had green flames, another orange, and another, purple. I note that the sun has set and it is now nighttime. A fourth kid comes outside and asks if he can fly with us.
"Sure, just focus your chi!"
He rockets up on red flames and joins us. We are not flying very high or very fast, but that matters not. This is still the most fun I've had in a lucid dream, ever! The colors of everyone's different chi against the night were just beautiful.
I sense that I am losing the dream. I look to the cluster of first-time fliers. For a moment, I thought that they were other dreamers and not dream characters.
"Now, look, I'll be back."
I lose the dream. I am in a black void for a second and see myself. I then wake up.

Well that's it, no TOTM this month. God dang it. Who cares, teaching dream characters to fly is much more fun than asking them what they are doing different this year anyway.

So that's it, got in my 8 LDs. Can't wait for February's TOTMs. I also thought of a good one on my own. I want to try and listen to music in a dream and see what it sounds like.

Morning of January 31, 2014. Friday.

Dream #: 17,210-01. Reading time: 1 min 20 sec.



I am in the “last cave,” the last form of existence bordering the world. I approach the wall to perhaps move on to “higher” awareness. There is a purple glow from the cave wall, a circle around the letter “M,” and two back to back instances of the letter “L” (representing our last names), which is also an upside-down “T.” It burns for a time, a “cool” fire. It also seems like an elevator button at the same time it is a lock (that I have a key for). (“M” can also represent an upside-down “W,” depending on the font or style.)

“M” is Virgo, the 6th (Yin) sign and 13th letter, Zsuzsanna born on the 13th and a Virgo. The upside-down “T” is Sagittarius (me), the 9th (Yang) sign and my birth on the 20th (T being the 20th letter). It is within the circle often reserved for the S and C (our first names when anglicized) or 6 and 9 of Yin Yang. No faux system (such as astrology) means anything, yet can form patterns to discern personal recognition.

“M” also came from the symbol for “water.”

“T” is the second (2 again) most common letter in English (after “E”). It is also the last letter of the Western Semitic and Hebrew alphabets..

T over M - “cross over the water,” a play on going to Australia to marry my twin flame Zsuzsanna

It represents TWO, approaching entropy of the English language (a coincidental letter pattern that spells “two”). The “W” (or “M”) splits into two instances of the letter “V,” the Gate itself, the Master number 22, and the bottom half of the Heart (in continuous cycles, also face to face twos). Even my last name means “the two.”

It is layer upon layer, and all the strength of every member of the human race cannot move or change it.

I am unsure where I will go. It is a phasing point that allows access to higher dimensions of any range.

---

Journal Entry Lucid #5 Dream, Lucid Dream , non-dream (Comments)
Background:

Dream fragment 1 from 5:00am-6:53am" Obama got jokes?": I watching a YouTube video with my sister. It was Obama he showed up on a stage as if a rock star. He was doing some dance as he walked to the pulpit. He was speaking some sort of weird language. It didn't make any sense. My sister and everybody in the crowd seemed to be enjoying it. I didn't quite understand why they enjoyed it. oh yeah he also jumped on top of someone in the crowd.

Dream fragment 2 from 5:00am-6:53am"Drive to school ": As I was driving to school I saw my friend, BN. The odd thing was that he was in a car with his dad on the wrong side of the street. I said hi to them. The dad looked at me weird. While I was driving away I thought hmm they were on the opposite side. My car turned for some reason and I had to do a quick 360 to make it face the right direction.

Dream 1 from 5:00am-6:53am"Distractions": I spectated a life of an addict. The addict was doing heroin, and lots of it. The mother which was played by my mother was crying, and my sister was also present with her. My mother was crying, saying that she lost her child. I got a glimpse of this heroin they were talking about and it looked like coco powder or chocolate powder. I said that is not heroin, heroin is darker than that. I had enough of this and started to participate in the dream. I became into being in my grandmother room. I turned on the light and saw all these shopping backs. My mother and sister came back home. I walked out and started to get some water from the fridge. My mother was telling me she was disappointed. I thought do they think I am an addict.

I realized it was a dream. It was like my body was vacant, without a mind. I can use my body. I looked at my hands and did a RC, just because. I counted 1,2,3,4,5,6,7, but as I counted I realized that the dream was starting to fade. I quickly resolved the counting by saying I have 7 fingers it is a dream. I started rubbing my hands. The scene went from a dark and dimly lit area to a lively place. It looked like morning and it was at a perfect temperature. As I was about to walk outside through the back door, someone grabs me by the hand. It was my sister. She said, "You have to come with me." I told her no (I was tired of my family distracting me). She said,"I am trying to save you". I thought,"from what? but realized that I should concentrate and ignore her". As I walked outside the house. Their was a beautiful fall tree with orange leaves, along with a nice park like area. I walked pretty far while rubbing my hands. It was crystal clear.

My sister comes outside the house and calls my name. I walked so far that she was the size of my hands from my perspective. I told her to go back inside and mind her own business. She didn't listen and began to walk. I didn't want to baby sit her like I did my dad in the other LD, so I warned her. I told her she better go back inside or I will have to stop her. I got angry and I pointed my hand towards her and tried to use telekinesis to throw her on the wall. I managed to stop her in her tracks but nothing else. Then this alien space ship appeared and it cut her into pieces, it was gory, and even her head got decapitated. I knew it was a DC, so I didn't care. I said, "I warned you, but that wasn't me." I saw her body come back together just like from the game, Prototype.

She said while her voice distorted back and forth from a man to some sort of alien species, "You should have listened to me I am on a whole another level". She jumped in the sky and landed next to me. From looking like the size of my hand she was right in front of me. She transformed into Alex Mercer than into the black guy from Prototype 2. He swung his blade at me. I had a brief thought about Alex Mercer, and my hands transformed into a shield. I thought, "Another distraction". I turned around while rubbing my hands to keep lucidity. The sky was now blood red. It was dark world to live in. I didn't have fear though. As I was walking away. I told him not to bother on attacking me because their is a force field protecting me. I was bluffing, I have never used a force field in dream and didn't know if it will work. He then walks to me and hugs me out of happiness. He said to me," that is exactly why I want to kill you. you know how long I have been waiting for this moment, I wanted to kill someone like you for a long time". I thought "what a dreamer". In prototype when he kills someone he could have their power. He was sad that he had to kill me though. I didn't care because I knew it was a dream. I was just angry that he was distracting me.He picked up a dead solider and he told me that the solider ratted on me. He tossed the dead solider's body on the floor, and he started telling me a story about the virus. He said,"after the virus infected people humans were being sold off to be killed. At last now...(I don't remember what he was saying because I was trying to walk away). I responded that is good. He said "no" in a desperate voice,"they sold us for only one penny!" I woke up instantly.

Reflection: My anger really shined in this dream. The scene transforming, my sister transforming was due to my negative energy. But it is what it is, next time I would handle this type of situation with love. I don't know how though, I don't want to be distracted by DC even if they look like family members.

I've forgotten completely how I became lucid, but I became lucid at one point and I only remember the following after that, so no point in color-coding.

I'm in my house upstairs with my brother Zach. Once I go lucid, I attempt to recall any dream goal of mine, but struggle with it and eventually give up. Instead, not wanting to waste LD time, I turn to Z (who knows I'm dreaming) and say, "Show me something interesting."

He cooperates and leads me outside. Like my house, the street looks much like it would in waking life, but the sunlight was extremely bright, the grass a vivid bright green, and there just seemed like there was an aura of happiness resting over the dreamworld. I smile, taking in this sight for a moment, and then Zach jumps and takes flight from the ground. I follow him up, and the moment I'm in the air, I notice the area past my street is much different than it should've been. He began flying away in a straight direction and I follow him, looking around at the massive town as I did so. It was completely and utterly random at this point--colorful structures and tall skyscrapers stuck up in every direction, with the woods bordering everything around. My interests are piqued as I wonder what Zach's going to show me.

Eventually we float back down to the ground, in which he leads me into a small, square, basic dark building. Inside the ground is all carpet, the lights are dim, and people are chit-chatting in every direction. It was very dark, but the atmosphere was very welcoming, much like a bar or a small party.

Zach leads me to the left and the right again into a large room where electronic music played in the background with a couple of bars and something interesting in the center--a small tennis court with maybe 3-4 people on each side. Most of the people looked like older teenagers, say around 15-19. They're playing...tennis, but with a few peculiarities. Firstly, they're playing with their hands (much like volleyball). The ball was mostly transparent, but the clear ball was surrounded with an intricate glowing orange design that left a motion blur behind it in the air and was quite easy to see. There seemed to be no way to take score--players just played until they got bored. The biggest difference to this kind of tennis and IWL tennis was the fact that the physics were very trippy. At the weirdest moments the ball would go in slow-motion, or shoot towards the ceiling, or fly past the players towards the wall.

Zach explained to me, "This is dream tennis. Kind of an interesting sport, I think. Do you want to try it out?"

I nod and grin and Zach and I join one of the teams together, and we play a few rounds. At first I mostly suck (no, really, I blatantly made the ball hit the 2-foot-tall net at one point), and I'm teased by my teammates about this, but I eventually (and proudly) get the hang of it. At one point in the middle of the game I question Zach as to why it's not called dream volleyball since you play with your hands. He only says, "I don't know, I didn't make the rules, I'm only a dream character!"

All in all the game and the dream itself was rather strange yet fun, and I totally wouldn't mind playing dream tennis again in a later LD. Eventually I wake up after a few rounds and I DEILD back to sleep, though the contents of the dream that followed are a bit more... private.

On a side-note, I remember a non-lucid dream fragment from earlier in the night where I was playing one of my favorite MMORPGs called Mabinogi, but that's all I can remember from that.

#274 - WILD - 1.29.14 - 4:22

After I wake from the last dream, I have wakefulness for over an hour. The last time I look at the clock it was just around 4:09AM. I finally get my mind to calm down and go straight into WILD using LaBerge's Twin Body Technique.

My head begins to feel wobbly and like it is floating off the pillow. I started the WILD on my left side and roll over to back. I feel a tearing sensation as I separate and hear a sound like metal ripping apart. I pause on my back think about this. OBE's feel so real. I get out of bed easily enough but feel very unstable and can't walk well at first. After a few more steps I seem to be fine. I am blind but I make my way into the living room. I want to stabilize and decide to try clapping. I clap one then a second time and to my surprise, the lights come on. Not only does the living light up but it is daytime outside. I chuckle to myself as I think about The Clapper commercials.

I everything seems really blurry but I decide to go ahead and make my way outside. As I move through the living room I notice there is a strange old TV on a high cart. It's on and the sound is very loud. I'm mildly interested and listen as I pass but all I hear is muffled sounds. I feel like I should be paying attention to it but I really want to get outside. The moment I touch the door and I jolted back to bed.

I DEILD and have to start over. I have the same tearing sensation and metallic sound. Luckily, the living room is already lit and the sun is still up. The same TV is still there blaring sound. Everything is still blurry so I take some time to stabilize by clapping and rubbing my hands. Luckily The Clapper was a one time use. My vision goes to a brown color and I worry about the void or waking up. I focus and the light returns. As I pace around, I ask the dream for a DC. I was wanting to ask some questions and try to probe the dream a little. No one seems to be willing to visit so I let it go for now.

After a moment or two, things get a little more stable. Though my vision was still sub-par, I decide I had spent enough time with this and head for the door. As I pass the TV I plainly hear a voice say, "ANNIHILATE THE HELL OUT OF NASA." I stop and say, "Whaaat?" I sit on the couch and really pay attention to the TV now. I see a news woman with a red blouse and brunette hair and her appearance seems a little outdated. I see the words, "CBS News" bottom of the screen but the sound has gone back to being muffled. I laugh out loud at the whole thing and decide to go ahead and leave.

When I get outside, It looks like late spring and everything us super lush and green. There is way more foliage and trees then my actually neighborhood. I check the temperature and notice it's not hot or cold but feels really nice. Perfect weather. I look for DC's but can't find any so I go for a walk on this spring day. I focus on sensory awareness as I walk. Everything is still a little blurry but I feel so entirely immersed in this reality that I take the time to appreciate where I am. Everything is so life like and has a real 3-Dimensional feel to it. I become overwhelmed with a sense of wonder and excitement that I can't contain. I shout out, "I LOVE LUCID DREAMING! WHOOOO!" I get a stray thought about DJing this experience while I shout out again. "YAAAHO...." My voice get cut off and I suddenly wake up.

Later I dream something about a child. I hear the alarm clock. Instead of the time, it reads, "SXSTUPID" I recognize this dream sign but I am too amused to do anything but laugh. I say, "Sucks stupid? What's that mean?" I fall to the floor laughing. When I look up I see too versions of my brother's wife making faces at me. I wake up.

I have another dream that turned semi[lucid though I thought of it more like a daydream than the dream it actually was. There is road worker blocking the road at a red light. There are no cones or vehicle or lights. Just the guy in the road. I find this odd and try to get over but the traffic is too dense. I make my own way as I drive. I control the dream to build a ramp into a parking garage. I keep consciously adding levels as I go up until I wake.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

(...) I start seeing ghosts. First they scare me, but then I become half lucid and lose my fear. Then I establish contact with them. They want my help. They seek a man, indirectly responsible for their deaths. A rich business man, with no moral, responsible for the despair of so many and cause of death of some of them. They want me to help them find him and kill him. I help them find where he lives and I wait by the entrance of his mansion with a bunch of ghosts floating around. When the man arrives home, the ghosts follow him and scare the bejesus out the guy. That's when I come in with a gun, when he is already freaked out by all those scary ghosts. They keep him all curled up on the floor, crying like a baby and ask me to kill him. That's when I'm invaded by a sudden overwhelming compassion for the guy. I can't pull the trigger. The ghosts keep telling me all the horrors he is capable of and pushing me to do it, but I can't. I start crying like a baby, I feel so much compassion for everybody, I can't honestly feel any anger for any being, I am drowning in tears for all the evil people in the world, because they are so ignorant, they don't know what they are doing.
So I tell the ghosts that I won't kill him, that he deserves to go to jail and to learn about the impacts of his actions and to have the opportunity to redeem himself, but I can't kill him. The ghosts are not happy, but they also can't kill him.

#273 - WILD - 1.29.14 - 2:59AM

pre-bed: 24oz beer 1 hour before bed.
WBTB G at 2:00AM

I get the feeling like all this is taking way too long and I think about how I have to get up for work soon. I realize that I feel a little odd so I relax. When I do, I shoot straight up. I can feel myself phase through the ceiling and then the roof. Then suddenly, I am sucked back into my body. I begin to feel vibes and try my usual exit but it's not working this time. I visualize walking and climbing stairs but nothing happens. I feel stuck in SP so I wait it out and meditate. I get breathing issues like I need to adjust my head. I feel like my neck is kinked in the wrong way but I can't move so I try to have even breathing and ignore it.

Later I feel my wife touching my hand like she somehow rolled over a little. It bothers me because I feel like it has woke me up a little so I gently scoot over just enough. I realize something felt really odd about my motions but I'm not sure what to do. I worry that I will have to start over so I just lay still.

I hear my wife say something about me talking in my sleep. I start to ask her what I was saying but she continues talking over me. Her voice transforms into some kind of electronic garble as she lazily flops her arm and head on my chest. Before I can react, we both fall off my side of the bed and I yell out, "WHOOOAAA!" I become very afraid of this DC and my first reaction was to react negatively like before. I say, "You are not my real wife." I stop myself myself there as I remember the conversation I recently had with Wurlman in our podcast. I decide to react with love instead. We are still entangled on the floor and I kiss her on the forehead as I say, "I love you babe. I love you. I love you." She doesn't say anything, but shakes her head "yes". The fear is gone but I worry this will turn sexual. I worry because I think of this DC as some kind of strange entity. The feeling I get from it seems off and unnatural. I wake up before anything else happens.

I finally had my second lucid a few nights ago. It lasted a while (maybe as long as 15 minutes), though this was a result of sheer luck. Every few minutes I woke into a false awakening, in which I was in sleep paralysis, so then moved directly back into the same dream. Throughout I assumed I was waking up and falling back asleep.

It started with me waking into sleep paralysis. This could have been a false awakening, but I’m unsure. My body was vibrating. I relaxed, falling into the vibrations and inward spinning, intent on seeing where these lead me. Eventually I felt myself standing in darkness, and long streaks of purple light began zooming around me. I looked down at my hands (so opened my dream eyes?) and saw they were blurry. I also noticed part of a room with white walls had appeared. I pushed my fingers through my palm and almost shouted out in excitement that “I did it”. I calmed myself down, then rubbed my hands together and tried to shout “clarity”, but my voice broke. The scene remained mainly blurry.

My lucidity levels moved up and down throughout the dream, and this began straight away. I decided I wanted to have sex, so tried to imagine a woman. The darkness was now one of the walls of the room, and “inside” the silhouettes of four women appeared (the woman I tried to imagine actually turned up later). They walked into the room, materialising as I stood amazed. One of them, who appeared incredibly vivid, came up to me and for some reason I now thought she was real. We went through a door into another small room, sat on a bed and talked about my having managed to lucid dream. She was excited, congratulating me. Suddenly another woman jumped onto the bed and asked why we weren’t with everyone else, and I remembered these were dream characters and I wanted to have sex.

I went back into the main room and the other two women were sitting on a couch. I started having sex with one of them, then someone jumped onto the couch. I looked up and saw none other than myself. Again, my lucidity level dropped, and I thought he was real. I wondered why I was also in this dream.

I stood up, confused, and looked around the room. There was a young man sitting at the “darkness wall”. I sensed that he had evil eyes and sharp teeth, so, remembering I should face anything scary, I began walking up to him. I was waking up, though. The scene changed to 3rd person and I watched myself giving him a high five.

Then I woke into sleep paralysis. I lay thinking about the vivid woman and how my “visualisation skills had improved”, then followed the vibrations back into the same room.

There were now only three women sitting on the couch, all blurry. Deciding I didn‘t want to have sex again, I turned to the “darkness wall”. I jogged towards it, wanting to see if I could fly to another dreamscape, and jumped over the edge. Below me, shinning out in the darkness, was a medieval castle (which was incredibly vivid). I wanted to go further, though, so I kept flying. Which was pretty amazing; I could feel and hear wind, and I was flying beside what appeared to be the outlines of tall buildings. After about thirty seconds, I began to worry that I would never reach anywhere, so turned around. Just as I saw the room in the distance I woke into sleep paralysis.

This time I was afraid. Something was quietly growling beside my face. I reminded myself that I had no reason to be afraid and it disappeared. Multi-coloured lights began flashing in front of me and I went through them.

Back in the room either my lucidity level was low, or I was dreaming. Two DCs I thought were my parents told me they had hired a private investigator to find my wife. I believed what they were saying, even knowing the woman was the one I tried to imagine earlier. We walked into another room, with a city behind a large window, and met the private investigator. He told us he would do everything he could then walked through a door into the city. My parents began arguing with me, saying I had been rude to him. I told them it was possible he wouldn’t come back, because I hadn’t yet went through to the city to check with others whether he was reliable.

Woke into sleep paralysis. Followed the vibrations.

I was back with my “parents”, but now knew they were DCs. I decided to see my WL mum, so turned around to a door, said my mum was in the room, then opened it. I saw her standing inside, then suddenly the entire mood of the room changed to one of anguish. For some reason I knew she was in pain because she was only a DC(?!!). Disturbed, I closed the door, and the mood disappeared.

I woke into sleep paralysis, only this time it wore off within seconds. I sat up and tried to write what just happened in my dream journal, but my pen didn’t work. (I checked the paper afterwards in WL and there were no depressions.) I lay back down and either fell asleep, or sleep paralysis hit me. I don’t remember.

Back in the room with my “parents” and wife, but lost lucidity and started dreaming about visiting a museum with them.

I woke into my last false awakening. My dog came into my room and I got up and gave her a pet. Then I woke into WL.

Jan 29-30 2014

Took LD supplements (8mg of Galantamine and 500mg of Choline) and had longest dreams and LDs I've ever had. I preferred to DEILD and keep trying than write them down. These are written much later, so details weren't as clear and some dreams were forgotten altogether.

Why Am I Working at Scottsdale?
* *I was working at a store in Scottsdale, but it was outside, really dark outside, and weirdly futuristic. My manager asked me to help this girl out but I didn't even have socks on yet. I told her to wait one moment, and she was like trying to help me with my socks. I got them on, with my shoes, then help her. She wanted to download an app or get it working or something, so I help her and when it works she opens it and it's a game she wanted to play. My friend SK shows up with ST, just to say hi or something. I ask why she is all the way out in Scottsdale.

Finding an Attractive Girl (Lucid)
* *One dream I was lucid that I have is I'm looking for an attractive girl. I'm outside a house and decide to look there, but realize I should look on the second floor. Keeping in mind it's a dream, I jump to the second floor, but still have to grab on to the railing and hoist myself up.
* *As I land I want to go in the house, but only see windows and no door. I just tell myself I'll be able to go through the windows and then hop through them. I phase right through as if they weren't there. When I get in there, I realize there is a girl actually outside on the second story, so I hop back through the windows and go up to her. She comes up to greet me and she is extremely attractive, with dark hair, vibrant eyes, and around my age.
* *It's like she knows me because we're extremely comfortable around each other, and I'm finding myself turned on. I keep reality checking and stabilizing to make sure I don't get too excited and wake up. She still acts her own though as she doesn't just do whatever I ask, but acts how she wants to.

Creepy Worms, Super Kids, and Levitation (Lucid)
* *I was in a house with 3 other kids, and there were mosquito type things flying around that eventually turned into like flying maggots. We knew these were dangerous so we tried swatting them or something. I told one of them to get me strainers, with small netting, and it takes a minute to find one. Once one of the guys grabs one, I find another and take both to go start catching them. When I run back though, they're all gone.
* *It was slightly eerie, then the doorbell rings. Someone gets it and there is a girl who tells us there are giant works taking over the house. And we see there is a weird slimy material on the outside of his front door frame. We run outside and there is a man there who claims it was he who did this.
* *I run at him to attack him, but notice he is surround by little kids. I didn't care and keep running, but then one little kid gets this evil look on his face and runs at me. I freak out and run away, but this kid is faster and tackles me and is surprisingly strong. I realize all those kids are enhanced to protect him. The one who took me down goes back to the man.
* *I forget some details here but I realize I'm dreaming and am with those kids in a happier setting. We're playing a game of some sort, which is weird cuz it's like football but I'm running with otter pops and have to empty them out at the end zone. I'm running and only one girl is chasing me, but I get just close enough as she tackles me to empty it out.
* *As we're heading back I ask her what her powers are, she says speed and strength. Around here I wake up again and get back into the dream, and want to get my own powers. I try out levitation, but I know it will be slightly tricky to wrap my mind around the concept and believe I can do it. I decide to stand on top of a bench and just trust fall to the ground knowing I can stop myself. I do it and it works, and I swing back up to the top or the bench! Amazed, I try again, and it works a second time.
* *As I keep trying, I fail every now and then, but knew I could do it at that point. I tried floating up to a trampoline, and it half worked. I know I wake up again around this point as I go back in imagining the feel of the trampoline.
* *One of characters says at a point, "well now he's going to get aroused" or something similar, and I take it as a queue they're done doing things and I should do what I want to now. The girl nearest me is very attractive and my age, so I take her hand and bring her towards a pool. She is willing and follows me. Sexy time begins at the pool.

Lucid Fragments
* *I'm in a garage, lots of beat up cars in there, but I know they're supposed to be nice. It's still weird though because they're like glitched like a video game and are half stuck inside each other or a wall.