memorable

Just A Pleasant Head Trip [Trip Report]
Cannabis
Date: September 11th, 2012

Dose:
repeated, smoked, Cannabis (plant material)

I packed an almost-filled bowl of something close to Mexican brick weed, but not quite as bricky, into my bong some time around 5:00 PM. This was to be the first of my experiences with cannabis after deciding to return to treating it as a psychedelic and something to be done occasionally rather than an all-day-every-day kind of high. I'd taken a short break before this so my tolerance was a bit lower than normal. I quickly downed a couple big rips and set the bong down. Lucky me, I tend to get psychedelic effects from smoking fairly easily, and the schwaggier the bud the more schizo it seems to make me.

Come-up anxiety tries to make itself known, but is quickly dismissed. Weed is nothing to fear. Somehow in the fog of the peak I became stuck on how trippy of a thought it was that we are literally the only species in the whole world that has come anywhere even remotely near as far as we have. I started considering all the strange things we as humans do to have fun, and how to any other species it must all just seem like complete absurdity. Like thinking about it from the point of view of an advanced alien race who has evolved to be extremely intelligent but still only focus on what needs to be done to survive and expand, having them come to Earth and seeing us going to clubs and dancing, and all that kind of stuff that would just seem totally pointless because we only do it because it's fun, and just wondering WHY those things are fun.... Like why is dancing fun? It just is. >w< But anyway, that made me think about what it'd be like for some random animal like a rat to be wandering through a rave or club, and then THAT made me think about what it would be like to be a human who was raised in the wild and never learned language so they act more like an animal wandering through a club. How would they feel? I began getting a strong mental imagery accompanying this, sort of like a third-person dream. A teenage boy who grew up in the wild unleashed in a club, the first thing he notices is all the people dancing around, especially the pretty girls dancing with guys. He's still a human so he's going to want to try to get in on the action, right? Would he learn to start dancing with everyone even without language? To be honest, I think he would... he may screw up a few times at first, but I think he'd learn. Thinking about that gave me sort of a sense of connection to my animal nature, just considering all the things we still do just because it's fun and we have an urge to let loose. It seems more complex than what animals do because there are so many different variables to consider in our situations, but it's all still the same kinds of instincts. The world really is a crazy, crazy place.

After I realized how couch-locked I'd been during all of that, I decided to get up and go out to the backyard and appreciate nature a bit. The weather outside felt amazing and it was very easy to feel in tune with everything. I wandered around looking at the tree and the garden a bit, and I got a couple pictures of things that really stood out to me.

First there are these leaves, which totally rock. They've got a nice fractally look to them, if you ask me. I could stare at them for ages.

And this mini rose, which is just wonderful. Look at the swirl, nature is so intensely beautiful.... I felt like crying when I first got a look at that flower....

That was about the end of significant parts of the experience. Weed is still the number one psychedelic in my book.

Attached Thumbnails

   

[Tuesday, September 11th, 2012]
There's a mall, which I assume is Prescott Mall, and I walk around it along with all the bustling people. I enter stores now and then, but my memory is pretty lame here. I walk outside I'm at Prescott still, but now it's an ocean dock-town scene. [**2**] Along the building, there's a rotting-wood walkway built above the water. There are restaraunts on the right-side and the ocean is to the left- but I pay the horizon no attention. (It was sunset at the time and I'm sure I missed the most beautiful scene...) Straight ahead, I follow the walkway to a door and follow it in. <My memory is empty of this room.> I emerge back out. Someone goes to a wall with three white vertical buttons- (like a vertical line that's fragmented into three short lines.) and he walks through the wall. It's a hidden Gambling Bar. I'm sure there's a cardgame inside. I press my hand through the middle button and I can see from the other side... It's a wall of the universe... with a painting of a woman cut into three sections (just like the line). (The wall goes forever, left and right, up and down, and it's filled with countless other symbols and paintings and ideas and markins and notes and thoughts of the human collective consciousness or maybe something more?) My hand emerges on the otherside of the wall from her chest, by her neck. I slide my hand back out with a little disappointment that I couldn't get in. Suddenly I realize this dock is a hidden workers-only area. I'm dressed in a similar uniform now and I grab a giant rug with a big picture or advertisement on it and roll it up and begin walking with it on my shoulder. I get funny suspicious looks from passerbys and workers, but no one stops me. I must look like I know what I'm doing, at least. My idea works! I get inside and drop the rug on the floor in a random spot where it seems to fit, and walk away casually. (My memory ends- I must have woken up here then fallen back asleep into the next dream.)

+

I faintly remember there being a drawer with a coupon in it for free Subway. Someone grabbed it out and used it before I could...My real dream recall starts in... I'm hungry and I want some fast food. I don't have any money whatsoever, but I have a strange feeling that makes me leave. I drive my Grandma's truck through town, having trouble sterring and keeping in the lines, but eventually I make it to the intersection of town just before the underpass. The world is dark, with the feeling of a calmed Zombie Apocalypse (as if the world has ended and this is the last safe haven, or its the end of the worst parts of the end... if you know what I mean. It's not neccesarily the plot as it is the 'mood') Passing by the actual intersection, I see flashing red and blue lights to the right towards Hassyampa School. I also hear faint police sirens everywhere. I see no cars. I keeping driving the dark streets, thinking about my lack of money and see more lights and hear more sounds. Come to think about it... the truck is silent. I can hear noises behind me coming from the Theatre. I ignore all these sounds as "my imagination running rampant", but I'm still worried about the police. I make it to the bridge and notice its MUCH bigger and longer than in reality. (I've already missed so many Dream signs. Damn.) The sky is puke dark rain. I cross the bridge without thinking again about it. I pass the unbuilt ruins of McDonalds and then Subway, and then suddenly there's flashing police lights behind me. Just then, I notice how bad I've been driving- swerving constantly. I try turning into Country Kitchen's parking lot with much difficulty, completely missing the first turn and barely making the second. I pull in and I'm halfway off the road when a curb appears in front of me. I'm stuck, and I glance over my shoulder to make sure the police are actually pulling me over. They are. I'm worried this might get me in even more trouble... I try reversing, but the car only moves forward. I press the brake more... I still move forward a bit. I'm confused more than panicked now, but I keep at the break, afraid to go flying over the curb if I let go. Suddenly, the officers are helping me in a strange way. The truck vanishes, and all I have is the shifter and the brake in my hands... there's also a yellow and black caution-striped half-tent above mine and the cop's head. I'm holding the brake down, as I shift into reverse, then I let go of the brake and walk backwards.

Next thing I know, I'm inside Country Kitchen- or at least a beat-up diner with the lights dimmed. It's filled with young people around my age, give or take. There's a bar to the left of me with a lone girl... there are tables and chairs and booths to the right of that. A bald cop follows me in and begins to babble about something to the whole restaraunt. I don't understand what he's trying to say- but I listen anyways. He sounds drunk or crazy. I dismiss him politely, after listening, and I forget he exists. I find someone who I feel like I "know"... but I don't remember anything specific about them. I approach her and she turns around and it's RUKIA! "Rukia!" I exclaim. She acknowledges me with slightly less enthusiasm. We converse about something before getting back to the matter at hand; FOOD. (I try not to be rude, but I hint that I have no money and that I'm hungry.) She suggests one way to get food:"Go look in the drawer at home, and there's a ticket-"Already used it- it's already used." I interrupt her "Hmm... well I guess if you wait a bit, I could help. I'm kind of waiting for something right now, though." (She replies something like that.) I understand this as her needing to find a nearby Hollow still. It's at this time my attention shifts to the bathroom doors. The bathrooms are straight ahead from the entrance on the left, past the bar. I get impatient after my attention returns, so I decide to speed up the process. Rukia is still just waiting on the Hollow...

I might not do this normally, but I know I can. I remember listening to "binaural beats" earlier that day... specifically the one that would open your third eye chakras. The whole day before that, I had an unruly sense of strange things too. My intuition is top-notch right now. I walk around the restaurant and try to find the Hollow- it has to be one of these people. I approach a couple: dismiss them, walk up to a filled table: not them, pass by a booth of teenagers: they're normal... then I reach the bar. It's this person! Their hair is a dark, dirty purple. It's a tangled mess that hangs over their face. I grab them by the arm and confirm it with their level of shock and resistance."It was YOU! AHA! I knew it was you!" I say with conviction, but letting my excitement get the best of me. I pull the Hollow-in-human-form to the back and disappear behind the bathroom swinging doors. Rukia gives me a blank stare. She's surprised but understands. Inside the bathroom, the Hollow slips out of my grip and shrinks, vanishing into the planked floor through a broken gap.... just like a mouse. I look closer, there's a pool of dirty water underneath these planks. The bathroom is very strange. (I'll have to illustrate it. [**3**]) But in the first room, I set my black dufflebag with red symbols on it down on the bathroom counter. The second two rooms ahead are bathrooms complete with... only urinals and planks for flooring. Below them, I can see dirty water again. The right planked-room is the one with the missing chunks of wood, and where the Hollow escaped. The left planked room has no missing wood, but a rusty blue steam-pipe wheel on the ground in the center of the room. I need to follow the Hollow, but I won't crawl down there unless the water is gone. I realize that the blue wheel must drain the water! I turn it clockwise, a little bit at a time... and it's working! The water starts to descend very slowly. Gradually as I turn, and the level descends, the rusty blue wheel crumbles and chips until its nothing but a metal stub with nothing to grip. I stand up and walk to the right planked room. The water is still there, but I can get underneath the planks without getting too wet now. I crawl down and can go under the wall to the next room. I stand up and I'm now in a room that turns to my right and follows a hallway. The water's up to my feet and its very dim in here. Trash floats along the dirty water.

<memory skips>

I was so close to finding that Hollow! It must have gotten away, because I didn't remember actually doing it. I think Rukia needs to know now- maybe she can help. She should understand if it got away. We'll find it again the next time it strikes. But what if she was trusting me? Testing me? Oh well. I walk out a door at the end of the sewer-like hallway to the left and it leads outside. There's no one. The world is empty. I walk back inside, heart-racing, then stop myself. I decide to use the front entrance this time to avoid getting wet again. My vision hangs back while I run ahead.

There's a figure crouching on the roof watching me, in all black.
"Finally, the Father of this World has returned."

I get back inside to the bathroom, where I set my black dufflebag- but it's been turned into a beige purse. I dig through it for something that'll help. I pull out a tin of Mentoids and pop one in my mouth. Memories of these mints rush through my mind... but they aren't the same as they used to be. The taste is dull and unfulfilling. I dig for more and find an Ipod... I'm sort of relieved, if I'm stuck in this World, I'll at least have music. Or even better, maybe I can use binaural beats to wake my out of this World. Wait- I'm drea-

(I wake up... and stretch... clinging on to what little dream recall I had at the time. I stopped and lied still for a moment to hang on to it, before typing this.)

Last night was pretty fun. My friend Nicholas was in my dream. He was showing me his video collection. He put some type of high tech disc into this DVD looking disc slot, and the machine opened up into a whole seven foot shelf stacked full with his game collection.
I began looking through it, and said "Wow, that's a nifty ass disc you got there. It's so small!" We looked towards each other and said "Ha, it's bigger on the inside." at the same time. For those of you who don't know, it's a Doctor Who reference.

We looked through the collection and put in a game. The game like usual in my dreams put my mind at the controls. It was a very interesting play, to be honest. It was a mixture of a few games put together including one of my favorites, League of Legends. I was running around as one of the characters, Darius. Nicholas showed me a few tricks in the game, one of them being an item that gave your fighter some super badass wings that added to your attack a whole bunch.

After that I found myself in another scene. This scene is hard to describe, but I'll do my best. I was walking on a scaffold surrounded by absolute void darkness- except for a room that I could see about ten feet above the scaffoled floor. It was lit, but I wasn't at it's level. On the scaffold with me was a little tinker robot. One that you would see on a video game as one of the low leveled enemys that dimly walked around and was defeated with one hit. I walked up to it, it stood about one foot tall- and I gave it a smack. It fell over and began short circuiting and sparking all over the ground so I back up right before it made a small explosion and into the blackness. I walked around and another one appeared around the edge. They didn't bother me, they were just kinda funny looking. I decided that I'd had it with this weird scaffold scene, so I tried to climb into the room up above. I managed to do that, but I can't stress enough how hard and exhausting it was for some reason, lol. And it made me terribly nervous because I didn't want to fall into whatever was down below, it was absolutely black and I knew that it was a very far fall.

Once I got into the room, 'physically' exhausted- I saw a man talking to another man and woman. It was a well lit room with sofas and a few decoritive plants, a nice carpet and some paintings. At this point I thought to myself, am I dreaming? Because I've been practicing awareness, asking myself that question often enough in the day time. I had the feeling that I was, but the man talking distracted me. He began talking about how I was a lucid dreamer and that I needed to tell everyone about all my experiences. But he said it in a strange way that irritated me, and I was still so exhausted that I just walked out.

That was the end of the night as far as I remember. I'm glad that I even thought to check myself in a dream. Unfortunetly my mind didn't follow through this time, but I'm getting there.

Non-dream Dream

Dream 1

I am hiking in Joshua Tree National Park with my wife and a group of about 15 people. I see a large, orange, striped tiger that looks exactly like a Bengal tiger cross the trail up ahead. We call it a bobcat since they are native to this region even though it is clearly a tiger. We all consider ourselves to be extremely lucky to spot one of these creatures in the wild. Then all of a sudden the bobcat circles around behind us and starts fake attacking. It continues to circle us for a while. My wife ways something in another language and I ask her to translate (I don’t remember what she says). Next someone from the group asks “Is this really happening?” I wish a professional was in our group to tell us how to respond to an aggressive tiger.

Next we are all in my house – specifically the kitchen. The bobcat keeps circling us and we begin to yell at it and start slapping its back to try and scare it away. Finally the bobcat tries to get out of the house but the sliding door is closed. We open it and the bobcat goes out into the back yard. I notice that my cat, V, is out by the pool and I think to myself “Oh it’s gonna be so cool to see how V interacts with the bobcat!” V meowed and the bobcat sees him. At that moment I realize what is going to happen and I am flooded with sorrow and anger (at myself for letting this happen). The bobcat grabs V in his mouth in a flash and carries him over the fence. The whole way out of the yard V’s eyes are locked with mine. I drop to my knees, head in hands, and start crying. A huge wave of emotions and thoughts come over me – it is my fault, the one thing that unconditionally loves me is dead because of me, etc.

I wake up with the song “Karma Police” by radio head stuck in my head (this is what you get…).

Dream 2:

My next door neighbors get a new front lawn installed.

Dream 3:

I am at a pool with my wife and we have two kids. I ask some guy for something - I think he is in a phone booth and I ask him for money.

Was working at some office with Leo. I was being lazy and the manager came to yell at me. She was a woman and I sweet talked my way out of trouble. She agreed to go out to dinner. I laughed and told Leo I would stick her and get a raise. Everyone left the office except for Leo kara and I. The whole place transformed into a giant palace like place with never ending rooms and adventures. We found a weird vial of green liquid. And went to find out what it was. A professor told me that inside the liquid was a tincture of mushrooms. That was an amazing find because Leo and I were looking for mushroom and the palace was A perfect place to take them. We each took a teaspoon and decided to take more later if it wasn't strong enough. Kara and I went off to explore the palace. We ended up in a giant room with Indian women in it. They were very welcoming and gave us a place to sit. We talked with them for a while and left. I was seeing the carpet start to move and just followed Lara wherever she went. We met one guy who pretended to stab kara. He turned out to be someone famous and kara left with him to explore. I wanted the shrooms to be stronger so I left to take more. I saw Leo and he was tripping out really hard. I left him and went to explore on my own. I went to the Indians and was showed out because I did not have a woman with me.

Everything may not be in correct order...

I remember I was in this like play, and I was an adult female. A creepy guy was beside me talking about something, then I guess he scared me, as I went above into the air vents, and he followed, I remember spraying something on him, don't remember what it was. Skip ahead, I wanted to go to this one secluded island off the side of NYC, and I was trying to make a getaway, but I was stuck listening to this guy..He offered to help me, but I didn't trust him. I sneaked away, onto a nearby island, and decided I needed to get somewhere specific. I floated into the air, scared at first not knowing if I could control it, but then I figured it out. Fists forward, superman like but with both fists, I found flying downwards brought my up, up brought me down, left and right worked fine. I could build up a lot of speed, but never got too far into the sky. My main goal was not hitting power lines or cars, but also worrying what others were thinking of someone flying past them while they were driving. I fly all the way to one corner of town, and stop as it is getting dark, and I am getting tired. There is an antiques shop, and an old restaurant. I tell the guy trying to help me over cell phone where I am, and he comes, I eat while he is on his way. I look at the things left over, I guess I got like fries and something else, the containers they were in were like McDonalds, but darker red, and old fashioned. It appears there are monopoly stickers on them, so I read them, one said "Discount on blah blah" The other one was free shake or something like that.

So the guy comes over, I steal his car(rude..), find a few things inside throw them out, and run the car into a 20 foot deep or so ditch. I then fly away across the town, as I am on the exact other corner of the town that I wanted to be in, it is daytime again, and I just keep flying. I reach my destination, it looks like nobody has ever been on the island, I am in paradise.

I feel like there was more to this dream, like with the car, just that stop mainly, and at the beginning, that play.. I think I have been to that place before where the play was..I can feel another dream coming to me from either last night or a few nights ago, but I can't quite remember what it is about .-. Actually, it is probably yesterday's dream that I couldn't remember..

After a really long dry spell of lucids with some quality I had this dream, which is in many ways a good step forward for me.

I was walking around in the town I lived in before, it was slightly dark and it felt really empty, but it was a pleasant atmosphere. The general color scheme was very bluish, and the sky had a light lavender with darker blue clouds. I turned around a corner to the school I was in before (BKB) and for some reason I suddenly knew I was dreaming. I was pretty offline though, as though I was sleeping inside of the dream, but the routines I trained over the past month kicked in and I remembered I should stabilize myself in the dream when I get lucid. I did so and pulled together all my focus, then I started to walk towards the school, shouting out for my dream guide. I didn't have a lot of power in my voice and there was no response, so I walked a bit further and it became quite dark. I used Lumos one time to light up the place but it didn't last long so I somehow got the idea to summon a "Battle Mag-Lite", a 2m long version of a normal Mag-Lite. I saw some weird person with a futuristic looking armor behind a force field. Then I woke up at once and couldn't get back in.


By the way, if you happen to read my dream journal, this is the first entry I made after moving. So when I say hometown now, it has a different meaning than it had before this entry. If I happen to dream about one of the old towns I will specifically say so.

Spoiler for Improvement Notes:

Broke the dry spell of lucids with a little more quality - Very Good
Remembered routines to fully get into the dream - Very Good
Called for Dream Guide - Good
Got no response - Bad
Suddenly woke up without getting anything done - Bad

Dream - Lucid

I was at my house. It was like I was in a video game, and I was lucid. I don't remember at what point I became lucid, I just remember that I was.

I went into the piano room. It was very dark. I walked up to the piano, and faintly saw my mom sitting there, playing, though I didn't hear any music. I sat down on the piano bench next to her. She stopped playing. For some reason, I thought she was going to be upset with me. Instead, she put her left arm around me and hugged me. We pulled away, and in her mouth, I saw a light blue pacifier.

~

I was, again, in a video game. I was with my mom, dad, and my cat, though I'm not sure if my brother was there or not. We were outside in a field with trees, like a more realistic, less blocky-looking Minecraft. The sky was blue, but it didn't look sunny. My dad was holding something the whole time, I think it was my cat.

Also with us was JP. I didn't know how we got into this situation with him, I didn't know why he was there. He was being his sly, charming, shady self, and for some reason, we were following him around. I kept wanting to tell my dad that JP was bad news, but I didn't want to do it in front of JP, in fear that he would hurt me or my family. I was surprised my dad couldn't tell something was wrong with him, since he's a psychiatrist. Maybe he did, but had the same fear as I.

At some point, we met JP's dad, whom I've never actually met IWL (I don't think he ever met him either, actually). He had the shaggy brown hair and mustache, but he looked a bit different than my guide, I think. I only ever saw him at a distance. I want to say he was in some other "dimension" of the world.

We were then underneath some white stone pavilion. JP wanted access to the "rainbow realm", and my dad had the means to get there. I knew it was bad, bad news if JP had access to that world for some reason. But my dad gave him what he needed anyway. All I had wanted my dad to do was pull his gun and kill him, but I knew JP had a gun too, and I didn't want anyone else to get hurt who didn't have to. I then watched as JP put together the rest of his portal or whatever it was, and he was surrounded by a rainbow glow. I think it made him more powerful.

We were then in what was supposed to be the "rainbow realm", but it looked the same as the original dimension, save for JP's dad was there too. The next thing I knew, we were running from them. My mom and I were both holding a different Belle (my cat). The one mom was holding was white, like IWL Belle is, and the one I was holding was a smoky grey with some brown speckles mixed in. As we ran, JP and his dad threw knives at us. One hit the Belle that mom was holding. My mom tossed her dead body aside. As she did, I saw the body as it came by me. I saw the stab wound, and the cat was no longer white, but looked like the one I was holding.

I was getting tired; my legs felt like they were going to give out. JP's dad, the one pursuing me the most, threw a knife at me that narrowly missed. I then tripped and fell, exhausted. As I fell, to save the cat, I tossed her aside and hoped she ran away. JP's dad closed in on me, though I kept trying to crawl away.

I woke up before he caught me.

~

I was in my house in my brother and I's bathroom. There was something inside the shower behind the half-closed curtain, but I wasn't sure what it was. I took a brown Kroger shopping bag with some objects in it, and hit it, whatever it was; I never saw what I was hitting. I then saw Belle, my cat, come out of the shower. She looked like she had a little nick in her fur on her neck, but there was no blood or anything. She was just fine. I pet her a bit.

I then walked into some gym-type room with lots of exercise machines. Not where I needed to be, and as I was leaving, I saw a ton of machines on the wall, as in suspended on the higher parts of the wall. On one of them, an exercise bike I believe, I saw someone I went to high school with named Jason.

I was then back at my house. I went into my parents' bedroom. None of the lights were on, but it wasn't pitch dark, just kind of dim. I started to go into the bathroom, when I saw two white cats that looked like Belle right outside of it, one pouring blood from a wound in her head/neck area, and the other dead, her eyes lifeless and cloudy. I touched the dead one, who looked more like a kitten than a full-grown cat, and her body was cold. I looked to the other, a more grown up cat, and she was trying to keep walking on, trying to keep going despite the bloody gash in her head. I started to get very upset, because not only was a cat dead and the other critically wounded, I knew I had done it when I hit the thing in the shower. I knew it, and I knew that the Belle that I pet in shower did not get hit. It was weird. I started yelling for my brother to call someone so we could get this cat to the animal ER. I didn't have very high hopes of her making it.

~

I was at some house party with a bunch of people I didn't know. It was nighttime. I had been talking with some guy right outside the house, and apparently, I was being a smartass. In fact, I was an asshole apparently, according to everyone at the party. I don't think I was trying to be, really, I was just coming off that way.

They all started to kind of gang up on me, calling me a jerk and stuff, telling everyone who didn't know that I was a jerk. I took it by being a smartass back to them. Then, I decided to be nice and polite to everyone instead.
"I can be nice too," I said.
The main guy whom I had been talking to before said something like "Oh yeah?" back.
I then started to reintroduce myself to everyone with a huge, genuine smile on my face.
"Hi, I'm Krista, it's nice to meet you!" I said to the people around me, each individually, shaking their hands. That seemed to be working!

I then remember being inside the house for a little bit.

Then, outside again, I introduced myself to a guy that looked like Jonah Hill. I think someone brought him up to me so he could meet me. We chatted for awhile, and started to kind of like one another. I knew he was kind of getting a crush on me.

We then were on a brown, wooden boat on this very big lake. Things started to get Minecraft-y here (so who can guess what game I've been playing lately? ). The boat kept almost overturning, and then, I fell out of the boat. The water was very, very cold. So cold, my legs were going numb, and I could barely move them. The guy who looked like Jonah Hill (I'm just gonna call him Jonah from now on) helped me out of the freezing water and back into the boat.

The boat then overturned, and we both fell out. I remember being underwater and seeing him. I was trying to reach him before he went over a waterfall that was not far from us. The current would take us there if we weren't careful.

I then pulled out a dirt block (Minecraft) so I would float, and while underwater, picked up another dirt block, and swam more quickly to Jonah, who was heading straight for the waterfall. I gave him the dirt block so he'd float too, and pulled him to safety.

Then, we were back at the house where the party was, and he cutely asked me if he could have my number. I smiled and said
"Yeah! Hold on, let me go get my phone."
I went back in to get my phone.

Then, I woke up.

This time i will write about my non lucid dream that happened in 2012-07-19. It was at 8:40am-10:30am. So it was in my REM time. (but because of school i only get 8 hours of sleep from 23:00pm to 07:00am so I don't get new dreams lately). And as always sorry for mistakes

I was riding home from school on my bicycle. On bicycle frame was sitting a young boy. He was about 5 years old. I fell off my bicycle and the boy dissapeared. I got up and a computer keyboard appeared super fast in my hands. Keyboard keys were in wrong places so I started to fix them. As soon as I fixed them some blueberries appeared. I ate them and the keyboard dissapeared. It all happened while I was driving...
Suddenly bicycle tire blown up. A guy stopped near me and said "Boom! Your tire got blown". I didin't cared about the tire and i just drove ahead.
Near traffic lights I saw a group of people. One guy was carrying some flowers. He came to a girl and started to stab her with those flowers. In ten seconds everything became dark and started to rain. I took out my umbrella from backpack and I entered to it (Umbrella was something similar to a portable house with holes for legs). I asked "Does anyone want to hide in my umbrella." That guy which stabbed girl with flowers answered "Yeah" and he entered my umbrella. The umbrella started to shrink. It stopped to shrink at that time then we almost had some space to breath. Traffic lights turned on green and we ran through a street. I suddenly thought "Where is my bicycle!". I left the umbrella and started to run back from where i came. At middle of street I crossed a group of ladies and I woke up.

So this is my first post to my Dream Journal.

I have many dreams each night, all of which I remember. Sometimes its LC, but haven’t quite gotten to the point of developing skills for exploring it. But each dream always leaves quite an impression on me.

Last day I went to bed around 11, after taking some ZMA. This drug helps me restore muscle tissue better after intense workout which I did yesterday, also its known for causing vivid dreams. Also had a tool for android that register REM state through motion, and is making me aware during sleep.

Found myself drifting in and out through different states of dream places during the first 1-2 hours during night. Like almost awake and yet deeply emerged into the dream plane. During this time I had all sorts of dream scenes that I experienced such as; Dystopia society – dark and batman like with akira (comic book) sense to it. Fighting monsters and saving my family. Another dream im an aviator having insane air battles in a small room, became aware here for a short time and tried to control the environment. During these different dream scenes I would awake between each, but not in my bed, but simply awake someplace in another dream - where I would also lay someplace and listening to some music.. Notices that the playlist had small soundtracks to it.. Noticed some named aviation thing, another an apple (inventor) thing... Saw different ones, but kept falling in.. Didn’t quite remember all of the smaller dreams.

There was a dream theme throughout the dreams though, the characters that were present to me, was part of my family and known people in different senses.. But they all seemed different - strange and kind of creepy. Kept having doubts and sort of got aware of my dream state through that notion.. But dreams just kept on going.. I then had a huge gap of forgotten dream, until a point were I am in my apartment with 8-10 family members. They all seemed strange and at that time I started to become more and more aware that I was dreaming, kept shouting at em' that I wanted the truth of who they were and that I was aware of them as being a dream character.

Then suddenly the dream took quite a dramatic turn. The people gathered in a small group and said to each other that they had to take action or something similar. And the next thing that happens, they disappear and I hear the ground shaking. I run out to my porch and look out over the water to the other side of the lake. And saw a HUGE spaceship, more intense and unimaginable that ive ever seen in a movie, take off. leaving the other side of the city filled with smoke and debris. The water started rising and soon found the yard and roads filled with 2 meters of water.. Rescue teams were sent for us, and first of I refused to leave my animals and started to pack.
Called my family which were in another part of the country, asking what is going on. I remember at that time that I took a picture of the spaceship, and send the picture to them. From this point on, I packed more.. neighbors came and we finally left my apartment, while the sky and surrounding were filled with water and a scary visual impressions..

Then the alarm clock woke me up.. Took me quite some time to realize what had just happened.. still kinda confused right now.

Not much to say as can't remember much of the dream now but the jist wast Skiiing down a mountain where i had skiied before in another dream, falling over and rolling down the slope. Then cut to a chateux and a slightly esscentric man in a suit serves me sushi. Just like what Sushi from Sushibayaki looks like (3 michlin star sushi restrauant). I take 2 bites of the best sushi i've never had. seriously amazing. Cant remember from there. Always love skiing dreams and sushi was a nice touch brain, thanks

This dreams starts out exactly as a movie would. It's an Office movie with a 1980's vibe. Sort of reminds me of scenes from the movie American Psycho. Idris Elba(the guy who plays stringer bell on the TV show The Wire) is a main character in this movie. Sometimes it's as if he is my good friend and sometimes it's as if I am him. I am also a different character in this movie like dream. We are part of a corrupt firm looking for a person who committed a crime against us. There is a secret meeting taking place and after voicing my opinion, I was promptly kicked out of the meeting room. I am disturbed about this and just wait out pacing in the hall way. I then go to the bathroom to and notice Idris Elba is in there also. I start thinking to myself, why is he in this movie with me and has some gray hair. If this is the 80's, shouldn't he be young or at least a teenager. Even with all this analyzing, I don't do a reality check. I, Instead rationalize all of it. We get out of the bathroom and I notice a hot secretary walking by and she looks suspicious. We grab hold of her and take her into a locked room and begin to interrogate her. From this point the dream takes a weird, kinky turn. I start to take her clothes off. At first she resist, but Idris is still asking her questions and then she gives in as I take off all her clothes and begin to taste her genital area. I can only remember how good it tasted before I woke up.


*This was a really vivid dream
*Even after analyzing some weird factors about the dream, I still couldn't manage to do a reality check .
*Dream signs show up again. Movie themed and known favorite actors.

Fun little dream:

I was with Tom DeLonge. It was like we were kids, except we looked like adults (at least he did. I didn't see myself) We were on a playground playing hopscotch, and talking and laughing. I thought I was going to remember all the things we talked about, but I no longer do. But I do remember we made up this little handshake/greeting where we knocked our fists together in a couple of ways, then our elbows, then our booties. And we thought it was so funny.

I woke up feeling happy and carefree, like a kid who had a good day.

I believe I had my first true DEILD this morning. I'll try to remember the details (it happened sometime between 7:30am - 9am), and I slept way in after that, so I don't remember a ton of details. But I know I had vibrations 3 times, and each time I went straight into a dream where I was in my bed and had to think for a bit to make sure I wasn't really awake (my room is starting to look too correct lol). There was literally seconds between each dream, where I didn't move, just felt the vibrations and immediately went into the dream. I also did the advanced TOTM! It was just a little blurry and pretty short because of how unnerving it was. At any rate, I woke up at 5am, went back to sleep, then 6am, sleep, 6:45am, sleep, 7:15am, sleep (lol, school mornings are rough). When I went to bed at 7:30am, I was so tired by this point that I felt the vibrations come on only after a few minutes of just laying there. I waited until I could start to see a picture, and I opened my eyes. It was my room, and again with the strange orangeish light that's almost my only giveaway that I'm dreaming. Still, I get up very slowly just in case. I look at my hands, and the tip of my right ring finger is missing which confirmed lucidity. I give everybody a good wiggle and leave the bedroom. Not thinking of the TOTM right away I decide to go outside and have a look around. I feel like flying (I don't usually, but now I'm starting too more. I think that's good because I bet I'll get to see and do more stuff this way hehe). I shoot straight up and as soon as I can see over the houses, I notice a huge river that doesn't exist irl. Then I think of the advanced TOTM and I bet I can manipulate this river into a cretaceous ocean once I'm underwater. Ever since I chickened out in my last attempt, I formed a plan: find water again, have a cage or some kind of underwater enclosure that lets me see but not get hurt, and one of those electrocutey things. It's a tall order I admit, but I'm really determined! Anyway, I flew up to the river bank, and I noticed a partially sunken inflatable blue canoe, big enough for one. I landed next to it, pulled it out and it immediately popped into shape. I sat down inside it, and it shoved itself on down the river. I willed it to form a glass shell over the top, which it did (but it didn't close properly, which I will discover later). I forgot about the weapon, oops. To my right in my new "sub" is a little control panel with a few unmarked buttons. I pretend I'm punching a combination for "The Cretaceous Period" and I say it aloud as I'm pushing the buttons. The submarine sinks to the ocean floor, and it's brown and murky and a bit hard to see (a little visual snowish). But I squint and pay close attention and move forward across the prehistoric ocean floor, looking for life. Sure enough, I see something that looks like an alligator at first, but as it got closer I noticed it was a mosasaur*. It was weaving left and right along the ocean floor, then it saw me. It paused for a moment and looked at me and I froze. It looked angry, like it wanted to get to me but didn't bother trying because I was protected. Then it swam off. A whole school of mosasaur came next, weaving back an forth like the first, all in unison. They all swam past my little nautilus, and each and every one looked at me all pissed in the same way as the first, then continued on. I was so scared, I thought I would wake up. Then they were gone, and I decided that was good enough for the task and I willed the sub to resurface. As it was moving up, it started filling with water. I just hoped it would make it up before I drowned. It didn't. But I was able to breath, I just wasn't breathing water. It felt like there was always a mask of air in front of my face, and water never came inside (which is actually normal for even my nonlucid underwater dreams, there's always a bit of air there). I could see the glimmer of the water's surface just above me when I woke up.

I felt vibrations right away, and knowingly phased into an LD in my room the same way. I got up and thought of the basic task (greedy). Already I wasn't sure how this was going to work, so I just left the bedroom and went to the living room. I stood in front of the piano and said "shrink" but nothing happened. I said it again, but this time I squatted down on the floor at the same time, hoping my subC would fill in the blanks lol. Nothing. So then I remembered someone on DV saying to just make everything around you grow instead. So I willed the furniture to grow, and all that happened was they stayed the same size, but the legs got really long lol. Then I woke up. That one is going to be way hard for me. I'm going to need a plan again, like maybe using a mirror portal or going up a beanstalk haha.

Same transition again (I'm already thinking how cool it's going to be to blog the fact that I did a true DEILD, as well as noticing that the 2nd was shorted than the first. So this one may end up being even shorter, oh well). Again, I "awoke" in my bed immediately lucid, got up, left the room and headed for the living room. I saw Danny (irl he's at work). I was glad I saw the DC version of him, because we had a bad fight last night irl, but this DC doesn't know that hehe. I hugged him and he bit my hand, demon style. I slapped him on the side of his head, and he returned to normal. I said "Let's go outside." We went to the front yard. It was cool, and cloudy. I said, "I can fly, want to come with me?" He said sure. I got behind him, and put my arms around his chest and locked my fingers. With effort, I jumped straight up, and we started to sink immediately. He was so heavy! I forced us to go higher, which worked, but it was hard to steer with Danny in my arms. We were heading straight for some trees, but I forced us to the right as hard as I could. I said "It's really hard to steer while holding you." But I managed to get us up higher, and over the houses. I said "Want to see something cool? Just over those houses is a really big river!" So I flew us to the river so he could see it. We just hovered over the rooftops, watching the water move for a few moments, then I woke up.

Gucci was barking irl so I got up and let him in. I went back to sleep and had a few FAs, all related to confronting Danny about our fight last night. That's all there was.


*edit: not pliosaurs, they were mosasaurs. I googled different ones and it was the mosasaur that were more alligator-looking.

Was at burning man again with kara. We were trying to sleep and prepare for the night. It was impossible to sleep and it was about to get to the point where it was too hot to sleep. I checked our tent and saw that we had almost no shade for the sun. I felt defeated and asked kara if she wanted to stay up for one day and leave early. She agreed and we met up with Leo a nd Dina who also wanted to leave after the night. I went on a solo adventure having mini forgotten conversations with people. I was ready to leave and went looking for all of them. Weird stuff was happening and people seemed to be dying. Word got around that the desert itself was reacting and killing everyone off. I decided to meet them outside of actual burning man and ran. Giant rocks were being thrown from the sky and crushing people. I was a little scared as I realized I was not ready to fully die just yet. Baron popped into my mind. As I was running and dodging giant rocks I was thinking about how weird it was that I was scared of death because I usually am not. I was getting further along the path and further from danger. I saw the exit. As I was getting closer the path filled with fire. It was either be burned to death or be crushed by a giant boulder. I realized there mas no escape and instantly my frame of mind Changed. I accepted death and jumped off the cliff with a smile of excitement of whAt was to come. I fell onto the rocks and was instantly crushed.
Leo and I were back at burning man trying to escape the desert. We were actually getting away. We made it out of the burning man area but as we went further things were still trying to kill everyone. We came to this little town and talked with some people who escaped. They were too busy trying to survive. We came across this building that appear ed d to be safe and relaxed. We recounted our adventures and somehow resized we were dead and that we never made it. I realized we were astral and got excited. I tried experimenting with different things and had an apparition appear and tell me that I was doing this experience right and to continue what I was doing. I closed my eyes and imagined teleportation. I woke