non-lucid

Supplement update: I'm wrapping up my no-caffine experiment. I've noticed improved sleep and some slight improvements to dream vividness but I think that effect is marginal. What I didn't expect was how much calmer I am off of caffeine and how much less anxiety I have that I didn't even know was there before. Going forward I will probably have caffeine related drinks here and there but I think I'm largely going to stay off of it just from how nice it's been.

I woke up at about 4:00am naturally after about 4 and a half hours of sleep. I decided I would stay up and sleep again in several hours. I went back to sleep for about an hour and a half at 11:00am but didn't recall any more dreams from this short sleep.

I'm thinking starting tomorrow I may try waking up after ~4 hours of sleep and then stay up for ~4 hours before getting my last ~4 hours of sleep just to see what it's like with dreaming, a sort of biphasic/segmented sleep pattern. My schedule is flexible these days so why not!



Dream 1

I’m in the passenger seat of a truck, some farmer guy is in the driver seat. He’s driving around the fenced perimeter of the property. As we’re driving I daydream (night-daydream? dreamdream?) a vision of pills that I think are Alpha-GPC but they’re modified in some way. When you take them they replace your vision with lighting against a black background, but only for a few seconds then the effect resumes being Alpha-GPC.

There is a loud compressor that is on. I ‘know’ that it doesn’t belong to us and that we shouldn’t be using it. A cop and some sort of addict show up, my companion stops driving and runs over to the compressor, shutting it off.

The cop and his companion walk up to me and we exchange some words, not sure what was said but the mood went from tense to neutral.



Dream 2

I’m with James and my dad, we are approaching a house that we’re supposed to be inspecting. Dad has no shirt on and his skin is very deeply tanned, he has a mystery scar on his left shoulder blade.

As we approach the building dad says something about the owner of the house is a 30-ish year nosy guy. I entered the house in a weird way, like the side paneling was peeled back and I ducked under and in.

Upon entering the building it’s immediately apparent that it’s in bad shape. Everything is covered in a sheen of wetness, the walls are soggy and wooden beams are waterlogged. It’s like nobody has lived in here for a year and the humidity was 100% all the while. I say that it’s too gross in here and that I’m leaving.


Now Dad James and I are approaching three mesh lawn chairs around a camp site on the small farm property from Dream 1. Dad takes the middle seat, James takes the seat on the left - the dream fades as I approach the last remaining seat.



Dream 3

I am wearing a kimono with a hakama, as are a group of maybe 20 other men. We’re all kneeling facing the same direction in several rows in an open grassy area. They are getting up and going in front of the group to present their swords, one at a time.

I look down and I have what looks to be a regular katana, unsheathed in my lap. Now a man goes in front of the group and presents his insanely long sword - reminiscent of Sephiroth’s Masamune. He boasts about how none of us wouldn’t even be able to get near him in a fight. I think about how the sword is probably not an advantage at all.

Spotty recall these past couple days, due to unusual sleep schedule at home.

Had a couple NLDS but can't remember the details.

Jamie dreams

1. A flash of her laying in bed, wearing a white bed dress. She's showing me something. I won't say what.

2. Me and Jamie are working at a Wal-Mart. But it's the overnight shift. Everyone gets the same half hour break on late night s so on our break I start walking to my car to eat and smoke. Jamie joins me while walking to my car and she asks if she could sit with me in my car.

3. While slightly dosing I had an HH image of Jamie encased in a strange device. She was in a glass orb and a giant wooden thing was connected to it which operated a door. An angel with large wings stood outside of it and operated the door. A man approached the glass, but he was really a lustful demon. Jamie saw the demon and began to get undressed for it. But it couldn't get it because the angel kept the door shut. Ok... Not sure what to make of that.

I keep waking up around the time I would usually set my WBTB alarm for even when it's off now. It felt like it took a long time to get back to sleep after waking up.


Dream 1

I’m sprinting directly at a loaf of bread so fast that I somehow cleave it cleanly in half. I repeatedly do this but it seems I do best when I have someone standing about 20ft in front of the bread and then I sprint at them and sort of slingshot around them as if they have a strong gravitational force, which propels me even quicker into the bread.

There is some sort of party going on as I’m doing this and I learn that this bread-cutting technique I’m doing is called the ‘herb werb’. After learning this I silently repeated under my breath ‘herb werb’, alternating between pronouncing it with and without a silent h.



Dream 2

I’m in a large apartment with a lot of my relatives, they were all frantically running around seemingly terrified. I’m in a bedroom, there are two closed doors to leave the room and I begin heading towards one of them.

When I’m about to reach the door the ghost of my grandma passes through it. She looks grumpy and continues through the room and passes through the other door. I was startled at first but then after seeing her face I said “Oh.. Grandma!” and watched her go on her way.

I open the door I was originally heading for and head out into a hallway to see everyone running around frantically. I ask Terry what’s going on and she exclaims “It’s grandma, she’s HaUnTiNg us!”.

I sort of wander around the apartment a bit, it has multiple hallways. I eventually enter a large kitchen with an island table. On one side of the island ghost grandma is sitting on a chair, and all around the other side are the relatives.

They are all sort of shouting at her things like “Why are you haunting us!”, “Just go back, why are you here?!”. I’m confident that I can at the very least deescalate the situation. As I walk over to the island I say “Hey everyone, let me talk to her for a moment”. They all back up and make room for me to sit across from grandma.

I ask her “How have you been?”. She seems angry and confused but answers. We begin having a pleasant conversation and her mood is improving. She’s now speaking as if she’s still alive and had not passed away. Then one of the relatives interrupts and asks me very loudly “When are you going to tell her to stop haunting us??” - Which ruins the progress I was making and upsets grandma. Someone else also chimes in “Why are you asking her these questions, she’s dead!”

The feelings of getting a handle on things but being set back was frustrating.



Dream 3

I’m with two annoying men dream characters that I wouldn’t normally associate myself with. They’re both parents and talking about parenting, let’s call them GuyA and GuyB.

GuyA is talking about how recently he was out shopping and his kids asked him to buy them something. He goes on to say how he began losing his temper with them and was arguing about it but then had a moment of clarity that he was acting like GuyB, and stopped being so hostile with his kids. GuyB seems unphased by this.

I look around and we’re standing by the doors of an apartment building, but there’s only a small ledge made out of stone that surrounds the building, which drops off to the ocean. I look out at the sea and it’s snowing lightly and dark out. The ocean is churning with huge swells, sometimes almost reaching our ledge.

I feel dispassionate and flat, I walk around the ledge to one of the other sides of the building and I see a small stretch of highway in the ocean running parallel to the building, it’s supported by 8 or so metal pillars going down into the ocean. It’s probably only about 100 ft long and the road ends abruptly on both sides.

I point to it and quietly say “Highway here, get your highway here” like one of those old times paper boys. I feel like I said something about ‘magic road’ as well.

GuyA looks at me, then the ocean highway back and forth several times. As if competing for my attention he begins running towards the ocean and shouts “Oh yeah? Well watch this!” as he leaps into the frigid water.

He begins comically doing an exaggerated butterfly stroke, every time he comes up for air he looks at me to check if I’m still watching. His clothing and coat seem to be slowing him down. I walk around to another side of the building.



Dream 4

I’m sitting on a large stone beach by the ocean, it’s very sunny and beautiful out. There are many little shelled creatures moving around me, about the size of golf balls. I consider how they look like the real life equivalent of enemies from a video game (Ninja Gaiden), even though the correlation didn’t actually make sense.

Someone says something to me, I look up to see who it is. I feel interrupted.

office

Short dream with low detail about working in an office building. We were moving boxes around and stuff.


Long dream

Started out... I was flying up in some interesting caves. They were endless and bright multi colored. I went in a crevice where some people were. Apparently my dad was working in the cave and we were laying tapes out. Some foreman mentioned my dad was fast and did everything in the cave so quickly.

I was wiping a tape that was by a damp spot with water flowing through it. I couldn't get it to stick and after several tries... I started yelling in frustration. The foreman told me to leave. I argued the work couldn't be done. The man said he had a guy that could do it, and a young guy took my spot. This sent me into a ranting rage. I started leaving.

Now I was walking down a grassy hill and some guy from the construction group was following me. We kept talking and he was trying to calm me down. I remember saying something like I was "hangry."

I went to the camp where I supposedly lived, tried to eat at a restaurant but the details are foggy. I also got kicked out of the restaurant.

Next I was in some store with advanced clocks and watches. This girl with long brown hair and grey eyes helped me in the store. Her name tag said , "Jamie," and might have even said so. She didn't seem to know who I was. And I wasn't sure it was my Jamie., even though the height and look was the same. She showed me a tiny clock inside a glass pyramid that fit in the palm of your hand. I guess it WAS Jamie, just that we didn't recognize one another.

I left the store and saw something like a sci Fi convention going on. People were walking from a door in Starfleet uniforms. For some reason I thought I had a pass to get in, so I walked right in. I walked past lines of people in similar uniforms. I tried to shake some actresses hand but she looked shocked. Security people kept scanning my forehead as I was walking through. Then security escorted me out

The security guy took me to the lobby and was holding my wrist. I kept telling him to let me go . Eventually after some talking we were friends. He showed me a watch he had that was in the shape of a glass pyramid. I told him that the Jamie girl that works there, looked and acted exactly the same as some girl named Jamie that I knew in another town years ago. A guy piped up... It was PewDiePie. And he said, "whoa, that's a crazy coincidence." Or something. We started talking but I woke up.

Jesus' message

I fell into a brief HH dream. A scene like and oil painting of Jesus slid from the left and came before my eyes. He said, " After careful consideration of knowing Jamie's character, I have determined that the reason why you haven't heard from her yet, is because she feels very guilty about how she mishandled you in the past. She also is very fearful of the same result happening again." Wow, okay. All I can say is I'm not willing to reach out either, since I already have a few times and have been only met with silence. I'm not willing to message someone who isn't going to respond. I don't want to harass her in any way. I guess we're just gonna have to run into eachother more... Or she CAN do the drive bys more if that's what it takes for her to feel comfortable with me, she has my permission.

neighbors house

Brief dream about house sitting my neighbors house. I was on some landing. It was night time and I was talking to some girl on the main floor. I was doing some dream parkour stuff around the house while we we talking. She was saying how the previous owner had all these rock tiles for the driveway and how he was taking them all to his new house . I responded that the current owner of the house we were sitting said the previous owner left a lot of those tiles in the basement. That's all I remember.

nice

I was walking down a busy suburban street at night time. I was with some friends or something. I saw a girl I seemed to recognize with orange hair. I said to the guy I was with that a thought she was cute. The girl came up to me and seemed to know me. I'm not sure if it was Asuka, or Jamie. We sat down somewhere on a bench with a tarp over it. I was holding her hand. I rested my head on her shoulder and fell asleep.

Rings:
I'm in a grassy area, and I may have just emerged from a cave.
There are tall rock walls all around. The area feels serene.
I become aware that this is a video game.
My girlfriend is here. She gestures to an item in front of me I can pickup.
The item is in a green glowing circle: an object I can obviously interact with.
It's a wedding ring. She is proposing.
The ring is a tiny thing. Thin and wooden, like a splinter.
I obviously accept it and move to put it on. I'm not concerned about how much she spent on the ring.
But, I am focused on making sure she knows that I don't mind.
I'm embarrassed because I have to ask her which is the ring finger.
I vaguely think about how this is gender role-reversal. It doesn't bother me much.

Been fairly discouraged recently from my lack of results. I feel like I'm trying too hard but at the same time I know if I put in less effort that doesn't get me anywhere from past experiences. I must be fundamentally missing something here.



Dream from the night of Feb 19th

A man is a DJ in a movie theater, switching between DJing and using a giant laser-tag assault rifle that lights up and makes zappy sounds. The zap sound effect is so crushed and poor quality sounding.

Everyone else is using old school laser-tag guns that have to reload slowly after each shot so it's unfair going against the DJ with his fully automatic laser.

I'm looking at the world top down and I see an airplane take off near three mile Island, the DJ guy is on it. I am with someone else and we both follow it landing in Ukraine where he is meeting a love interest. It's like an Indiana Jones map sequence but viewing the real world instead of a map.

As the above is going on I'm simultaneously holding a jar of mayo. I have a lid that is so small that it fits inside the jar of mayo and I begin screwing it on, halfway inside the jar. I can feel the threading catch as it tightens, there's mayo all over my hands. It's not even a complete lid, it's just the outer rim of a mason jar lid without the center metal part with the gasket.


Now the dreams from last night
I did a WBTB last night.



Dream 1

I'm at some sort of gathering and I have a non-IWL girlfriend with me. It's like we're trapped in some sort of giant playpen, the floor was thick foam and there was colorful jungle-gym like equipment around us. We want some privacy so we use these giant foam buildable pieces to make a sort of fortress.

When we get into the fortress that we built it's suddenly as if we're in a car that's very similar to a Chrysler 300 S. We're putting the seats forward to make room as we're in the back seats.

The tinted windows are halfway down and I notice we're now parked by a restaurant and a large window is about 50 ft away from us. My mom is in this restaurant seated right by the window and she's staring at us grumpily. I put the windows up to block the view of her.

I don't know where this fits in but Tami asks me "how come when people refer to Banjo-Kazooie they don't talk about the characters or worlds, they just say 'Banjo-Kazooie'.



Dream 2

There are these cats that have really thick fur that is more like sheep wool. It's very dense and feels awesome to squeeze their fur, I could feel the oils that were in it. There were two of these cats and they were on a bed. The bed had three strips going down the length of it, as if demonstrating that this bed could have three people in it.

I bring Tami to the bed and want to show her these cats, she pets them then lays down in the middle spot on the bed. Suddenly there's a creepy guy to her left in that 'slot' and rolls over to her, grinning with his face way too close to her cheek, I instinctively push him off the bed.


Dream 3

I'm speaking with RacheL. We're talking about mundane things in life that 'you just have to do'. Like work, shopping, etc. She says 'why would you do that?' to one of these things that seem mandatory in life. And I say well you know, it's something we have to do - you know? She says 'Uhh.. No'. I ask her 'Haven't you ever had to do something before that you didn't want to do?' to which she responds plainly 'No. Why would you do that?', and looks at me in a way that makes me 'remember'. I stop and think 'You're right.. I don't have to do anything that I don't want to do' and genuinely felt like it was true, almost like remembering a state before this life or something where everything truly is optional.



Dream 4 - Fragment

Some small tribe camp with tents by the sea, a campfire is in a central location of the camp. The camp is stormed by people from another tribe that are very similarly dressed as the people in the tribe they're attacking, loin cloths and white dripping painted handprints against their dark skin. Some had spears, some had bows and arrows.



Dream 5 - Fragment
VHS tapes or something in a store. One section had long artificial seaweed for a fish tank, Tami wanted it. (IWL she bought some fish today, funny coincidence)



Dream 6 - Fragment
There is David and someone else, perhaps James. They are getting a new computer for me, almost like as a reimbursement for something they messed up on.

Dream recall increasing from journalling more. Yay!

Dog wtf

Dream of seeing my dog again. He was barking at me again. His mouth looked funny again. It reminded me of the previous dream when he looked like that, but I didn't think to do an RC.

Jamie 1

Flash of me and Jamie walking away from my house that I was in when I was renting the basement suite in 2011. We were arm in arm. My vision zoomed out in 3rd person perspective. It was night time, and we both looked semi anime. We also were smiling and looked kind of dazed.

Mirror

I was staring out of a window. I noticed my reflection. I was a girl though and I slightly resembled Jamie... I had spots on my face, like sick with the measles or something. My vision zoomed in and the spots were really sweat drops discoloring my skin. I looked away and looked back and now I was my normal self but still sweating. I was wondering how sick I was.

Jamie 2

I was in a large store like a Sears or something. Asuka was behind me and Jamie was beside me. We were walking on the tile path between the wall and a clothing section when a really short blond girl blocked my path. Some music started playing while we were talking and for some reason we started dancing. But I was confused about which hand should go where. I switched hand positions a couple of times. I then remembered that I was with Jamie, and I shouldn't be doing anything to make her jealous. ( only problem with my dream state I'm like a drunk guy and everything I do is impulsive). I leave the girl and find Jamie sitting on the floor on the edge of the clothing section. Asuka is just in the background watching. I sit down in front of Jamie, she still looks semi anime, she's staring into space and is smiling. I try talking to her but she hardly replies. I grab her hands and stand up. She stands up with me. I think asuka was using a song spell on Jamie or something when I was talking to the girl to trance her out from noticing, or being jealous. Maybe the song spell made me sober to think of Jamie as well.

Next night

Terrorists

I was in a town that reminded me of Red deer. I was walking into a store when I noticed a bunch of Arab looking guys in black bullet proof vests carrying large guns go into a bank across the street. I go into the store and warn everyone in there to quickly leave the store and that I seen people with guns. I hear a bunch of gunshots and I leave the store. The Arab guy keeping 6 makes direct eye contact with me. I pretend I don't notice and quickly enter a glass door leading into the hallway that goes to the other end of the shopping plaza..l I exit into a residential area and keep walking.

Last night.

Moving in together

Jamie asks me to move in with her (her exact words). But when I move in it sucks. Jamie doesn't talk to me at all. I remember eating at a dinner table with her and her parents... Maybe siblings? I'm given my own room. I keep passing Jamie in the hallways but she never looks at me. This seems to go on for a day or two and I'm considering just moving out, since I feel like a complete stranger there.

Dog

I'm in the backyard of a house by a garden. I see my dogs dad (who we put down years ago) he's a large and intimidating rottweiler. I think it's strange he should be around. He growls and runs past me, one of his hind paws is mangled. I noticed smoke by some plants and notice a small fire when I get there. I have to pee and consider putting it out that way. I try to but the my jeans get caught on some thorn bushes. I wake up.

Semi lucid

Prelude: I dream I am laying in bed. Jamie is talking to me as a voice in my head. I tell her I'm meeting up with Raven in a dream and we are going to see some cool dream place, I invite Jamie along. Jamie says in my head that she's going to put on something special for the occasion.

***

I'm on a motorbike and stop at some hobby place. I go inside to reserve a table for the people coming (Raven, Jamie, maybe asuka). Inside the place people are playing cards and chess. I notice a piano in the corner and make a mental note to talk to the owner about tuning the piano and leaving some cards, since I just got certification in piano tuning and repair.

I slap my jacket over the table to reserve it and leave. Outside is no longer a street, but a huge Campus. I walk through a few large buildings on the campus, I walk by a room with ridiculously large bleachers inside.

Outside I meet up with my group. A hooded lady, who looks like she's going to a cosplay convention. Two golems, the clay made into man, kind. A lady wearing wearing a blue wig with a large braid hung over one shoulder she introduced herself as "Samantha." Or something (Asuka). I say I reserved a table in a game room where we can play cards or chess. The two golems shrug and agree that could be fun.

I begin walking through the campus again with the group. After sometime, the two golems are walking ahead of me, and that's when I hear Jamie call my name. I looked behind me, and she's barely even dressed. She's wearing a golden bra with sparkles on it. She walks past me and she's only also wearing a g string of the same color. On her waist is a thin gold chain with a blue veil mesh which barely covers even the top of her.... Box. The tips of her hair are blond. She turns her head around and smiles at me, asking with her eyes if I like what I see, then walks beside the Two golems.

It then clicks in. I remembered the conversation in my head with her, when she said she was going to wear something special . For the bedroom yes, but for chess club? I'm about to follow them through the door when " Samantha," distracts me and starts talking to me. Then I open the door but the hobby/game place is gone and it's the room with the strange bleachers.

I run outside and look for my group. I give up after a while and fly atop some pole sign. I turn and see Samantha again with her blue hair. She seems to be trying to cheer me up from losing the group. I notice she's wearing stilts to reach the height of the pole sign. I say, "You know this is a dream right? You don't have to wear those, just fly up." But she vanishes. Then I notice her below on the grass waving at me. She teleported.

I shrug it off and fly away. I notice people on one of the ledges of the campus building. They are waving at me and calling for help. But I keep flying. Then I notice more people need help. I fly to them to rescue them. They are no longer people. Just mouths stuck on the ledges, they are just lying there calling for help. I go to pick a mouth up then it vomits on my hand. I stare at the mouth and it seemingly dies like when a bee loses it's stinger. I go to grab another one but the same thing happens. The stench is getting to me. I almost begin to vomit myself when I wake up.

Well my recall has been terrible for the past... 2 weeks? I just got back from 5 days in New York and was hoping for some good dreams there since I had a hotel room all to myself. But alas, nothing. Perhaps shifting my sleep schedule had a bigger effect than I thought since on the first night back I already got a non-lucid AND a lucid dream (isn't that exciting!). The lucid will follow in my next entry.

In a church, I'm singing in choir. The spacious room has Victorian dark wood panelling about half the height of the wall and the double doors (also panelled) are rectangular, rather than the portal shape I would expect. They are set in a heavy moulded stone doorway. The masonry is all white, but the church is brick on the outside. I see several items of old gothic furniture, including an elaborately carved wooden lectern. I head to the exit and see papers, leaflets, posters pinned on a door and piled on chairs by the entrance. A man is standing with a profound expression next to a stand of green leaflets by the open door, and I think that he will sing if I ask him to. I go out.

I walk back with another girl in choir. I ask if she is going back to 'choir boot camp' with me on Monday and she affirms that she is. We talk more, laughing a lot - though she doesn't remind me of anybody. I ponder how the camp lasts 6 school days (although it might be 7 considering the timeline in my head) and I can't believe the headmistress let me miss that much school.

Later I arrive at home with a Japanese woman, older. I see a black cat on my doorstep and point it out to her. She seems to look right through it for several seconds before noticing. I feel annoyed because 'she always does that'. So I try saying 'there's a cat ' in Japanese to better attract her attention. This causes her to freak out - she screams and grabs me roughly (seriously - it hurt!) by the shoulders, telling me not to 'say there is a kitten' or I will scare her. I think that she misunderstood me, and now she thinks there is a kitten under the nearest car.

Fragment: I pick up one of my dresses and find that on one side, the fabric has ripped all along the zip and hangs open. This dress doesn't actually have a zip. I am distraught since I only recently discovered a rip in my other favourite dress (this is true) and now I can't wear either of these until they're fixed.

See how it took me more than a week to post this? I'm getting lazy... Too lazy... Too lazy to dream journal. Which isn't great. But finally I'm getting back on track and practicing awareness more during the day, so hopefully some results soon.

‎Not last night but the night before I was having some trouble getting to sleep so I tried some mirtazapine for the second time. From my biometrics, and what I felt, it looks like it pretty much eliminates REM sleep. Which makes sense why people that are on it regularly say that it causes extremely vivid dreams - the REM rebound probably builds over days until it's forced to be incorporated eventually and comes through as really powerful dreams. With that in mind I most likely won't be experimenting with this one much more going forward, I felt really unrested the following day.

It was a struggle to recall these dreams this morning.


‎Dream 1

There are about five or so women laying down. They’re talking about work. One of them has the luxury of taking off as much time as she wants whenever she wants and she’s bragging about this.

I’m a short distance from them yet in an entirely different environment. It’s almost as if they’re on a beach and I’m in a bathroom. This dream was very loose with visuals.



Dream 2

There is a cliff that drops about 100 ft. At the midway point of the cliff and the ground there are stone triangular structures jutting from the cliff, they're very polygonal and reminiscent of structural shapes too. I hop across these as I run and walk.



Dream 3

There is an enormous black room, how deep is unclear as it fades to blackness in all directions. There is a small metal scaffolding platform with a door nearby. A naked asian man hangs in the middle of this space by a bunch of black straps around his shoulders and thighs that hang from the blackness above.

A naked woman emerges from the door and also attaches straps to herself and hangs with the asian man above the void. They begin having sex and now appear to be covered in oil. They’re both very lean and athletic, it's a very sensual scene. There is a large window facing them, behind it is an old white haired balding scientist. He’s wearing a white lab coat and is quickly writing down notes with a clipboard as he observes this scene. This whole ‘experiment’ was set up by him.

The woman was the dream character that had the flexible schedule from dream 1.



Dream 4

I’m bringing donuts to the place the five ladies from earlier are working. They’re excited about this but they’re saying something about how someone else should be here for this too. Apparently someone wasn’t there and called off work. Half the time they’re referring to them as she, and the other half as he.

‎After my last dream of the night I recalled my dreams in bed and then visualized my last dream as if it were to continue. It went from a daydream to nearly lucid-dream clear for a moment but then faded back to a daydream and I got up for the day shortly after.



Dream 1

I'm on a cruise ship or ferry. B and S are there eating at a buffet. B was carrying around a large white mannequin* There was an ice bucket for champagne, he threw the mannequin like a spear head first into it. I have a device similar to the dragonball tracker that shows B on it. It shows him as a light green circle on a green grid moving about the buffet.



Dream 2

I'm in a small neighborhood and I'm not sure which house is mine. I enter a house just as a van starts parking in the driveway. I realize it's not my place so I leave hastily.

I begin heading towards another house, a father and his son were in my way at one point. The kid was on a tricycle asking me to play and the dad said something like "Oh this man looks like he's busy, let's let him go do what he has to do".

I enter another house and 'remember' that I'm on some sort of trip here with friends. I look at the shoes in the doorway and decide none of them belong to any of my friends so I leave.

I enter yet another house and by the time I'm halfway through I decide I don't recognize it and use the door on the opposite side of the house to leave. But it leads to a small apartment instead. There is a staircase that goes up to a small second floor which has a bannister that overlooks down into the area I'm in.

There is also a door directly in front of me that looks like it would go outside. I go and open it and it does take me outside, but I hear someone behind me saying "Hello?" I turn around and there's a guy on the second floor by the railing, he has a towel on and his hair is wet. Must've just gotten out of the shower.

I explain to him that I'm lost and apologize for entering his home. He doesn't seem to mind that and says he recognizes me. Then he asks if I'm James's brother and I learn that they're friends.

We end up talking about LAN parties, Halo CE, and modded X-Box's.



Dream 3

Tami and I are at a car dealership. The white cop car that I sold to that woman and her family in my dream the other night is parked there!** Tami and I are looking at some other cars and then leave. As we are leaving we are talking about a strange car we see in the lot. We end up u-turning to park again to take a look at it.

I notice the white cop car has drifted out of its parking spot. I push it back into place, it's in neutral. I tried to start it but the battery is dead. I consider talking to the dealership's mechanics to get the battery charged so it won't be dead when the family I sold the car to get back to it.

*Because of a white shiny mannequin head that was in a vid I recently viewed.

**I hardly ever have dreams referencing past dreams so this was pretty cool.

‎
WBTB - 3:30am

I've been curious what kind of efffect an extremely low dose of LSD would do after a WBTB on dreaming so I gave it a shot tonight. I woke up and took ~2.5 μg of LSD and immediately went back to bed without staying up for more than a few minutes. I quickly felt something in my mind 'turn on' and I realized that even though this was a micro-dose of a micro-dose that it was still going to be enough to probably interrupt my sleep based on what I was feeling.

It did take a while to fall back asleep so I'm going to try this again in a few days but at one tenth of this dose at ~0.25 μg instead. These dreams were more vivid than usual but at the same time felt sort of interrupted.


Dream 1

I'm selling a white car that was previously a cop car. Some people are going to come by to look at it.

A cop car parks in my driveway and two police get out. They have keys to open the car I'm selling, they get in and try to start it but fail. They don't seem happy and they say they'll be back, they want to take it or impound it or something.

Then a family came by, a wife, husband and their son. The wife wanted the car so she paid for it and they drove off.

She ends up texting me something about a bullet hole in the car and that it's not working.

I drive out and find them, looks like she hit a tree. They're all okay and I ask her about this bullet hole that she mentioned. She says nevermind about that, I end up taking the car off their hands to scrap it.

Dream 2

A really emotionally charged dream, no doubt brought on by the LSD.

‎
Notable substances: ALCAR/Phosphatidyl Choline in the AM, two alcoholic drinks ~7PM, Galantamine after WBTB 3:30am


My recall finally felt decent tonight!

Dream 1

I’m watching Summit1G parachuting into a match of H1Z1. He’s falling in over a wilderness landscape, heading towards a massive bonfire with another ring of fire around it. As he descends a tracking rocket approaches him and he tries to dodge it as it circles back around over and over again trying to land a strike on him.


Now the view is of him on his PC in his room and he spawns pixelated grass around himself in the room. Someone outside the door says something.



Dream 2

I’m traveling on a very narrow dirt road going uphill (I think it’s on the same H1Z1 map, but this is a reality setting). It’s a single lane path and there are many people in front and behind me. The road curves around a large white object that resembles an airplane’s fuselage.

When I’m at the halfway point of driving around this object the corner of my bumper collides with it and I’m comically launched into the air ~100ft. I end up landing way up ahead on the road in the way I was traveling. I reach the end point of this road which is some sort of base camp or small town. There’s another single lane dirt road that goes back the way I came from.


There’s a chain link fence separating the roads from the town with a bunch of protesters on the side of the town facing the two roads. The protestors are demanding the option to be able to use either single lane road to travel back on, that it’s their right to have the option to choose whichever road they want to use for travel. There were some officials trying to work this out with them.


I walk past this and enter a building. There is a long hall in front of me and the ground is tiled like a bathroom, it feels like a liminal space (backrooms). I’m wearing a backpack.


My right boot feels like it was struck, when I turn around I don’t see anyone or anything that could have struck me.

I enter a doorway on the right and enter a bathroom, the same tiled floor continues. The first thing I see is a wall with a large mirror and three sinks in front of it. Beneath each sink is a waste bin which I interpret as makeshift urinals here. People are coming and going into the room as I observe this.

I decide not to use the waste bins so I go deeper into the bathroom, it opens up into a large room. It sort of resembles an office, except the ‘cubicles’ are about half a ft tall and the tiling covers them as well. And where desks would be in these cubicles are toilets.

I go up to one of these toilets to use and it looks ancient, almost steampunk-esque. I’m suddenly discombobulated and feel drunk. I stumble and my foot ends up in this toilet, which of course is full of crap.

I take my boot out right away and it’s filthy. As I slowly put my foot back on the ground I notice there’s a lady right beside me kneeling, almost like a nun. She’s ready with a rag for this exact scenario and begins cleaning my boot but I instinctively yank my foot away from her because of how nasty the whole scenario is and how degrading her position feels to me.

I say to her “Thanks but..” I look to my left and there’s this large, equally ancient looking rusty washing machine and continue “..I’ll just use this washing machine instead!”

I put my boot inside the washing machine and press down the safety button so the machine thinks the door is closed and turn it on. Water pours over my boot and cleans it.



Dream 3

I’m in a bathroom that is the size of an average living room. On the far end there’s a shower, sink and toilet. The tiling on this end extends out to the size of a normal bathroom and then terminates where a wall normally would be.

Tami’s taking a shower, I notice on the other far end of this room there is a showerhead near the wall, and some tiling around it. But between these two sides is grass. I pop into Tami’s shower and say “I’m gonna make a path so you can go to the other shower!”.

I take a bunch of towels and make a path from her shower, across the grass and to the other shower. She runs across it and I turn on the shower head that she reached, it must have not been in use for a long time as nasty rusty water came sputtering out. She ran back to the other shower.



Dream 4

I’m playing on the original GameBoy. There’s some sort of save option that would normally be reserved for emulators, like a save state. I have to do some complicated menu options to pull this off.



Dream 5

I have a new apartment and I’m planning for something. James is jealous for some reason of whatever these plans are. He has the leg of a stool which is chrome metal. It has a piston-like function similar to how office chairs can be adjusted to be lower or higher and he’s making it go up and down.



WBTB - 3:30am

I wrote down these previous dreams and then took a Galantamine. It started working too quickly and I couldn’t get back to sleep so I tried to WILD.

I had one hour of conscious sleep with no events. Then I began hearing sounds, I assumed Tami was waking up but I heard some doors opening and people talking and coming into the house. I took this as what was really happening but this was actually a dream forming.

I tried to get up to see what was going on but instead was trapped in sleep paralysis. As I strained to get up my hands and feet began tingling really strangely. It took a lot of effort but I eventually pulled myself upright, when it dawned on me that Tami was still asleep and it was all just a dream that was beginning to form.

Note: I was stranded for an hour in Didsbury while my family (Dad brother) went to the rec center. I was hungry and was dropped off at Tim Hortons to have a meal. On walking towards the rec center a white SUV drove past me and the woman driving by looked like Jamie, and she was smiling at me (With teeth)! I could have sworn she did a drive by at the end of the summer but was in a rickety brown SUV. Maybe not the same person, or maybe I'm imagining things? Maybe she traded in her old vehicle? So, we've gone from pretending I don't exist, to, drive bys and stealing glances to, driving by and smiling. What's the next step? waving? Not a joke or sarcasm. Slowly but surely... <----- positive dots!!!

Dream 1

Me and Jamie are in a car and we are pulling up to fas gas in olds. That's it.

Dream 2

Dreaming from Jamie's perspective, I'm in a house and I'm looking out a window waiting until someone pulls. I feel like a real estate agent in this dream.

Dream 3

I walk into a large room with all these colorful lights enhanced by a smoke machine. (If you've ever been to the mirror museum exhibit in chinook mall this is exactly what it was like)Jamie is in the room but she is gigantic and laying on the floor. I'm only as tall as the width of one of her legs. That's it I just walk in and that's it.

At least one or two other dreams of Jamie not even a fraction of a second long.

Psych ward

I live in a psych ward or retreat (Definitely where I belong btw.) I'm friends with an older brown haired woman. We both smoke and get eachother smokes or something. She wears a ponytail and wears glasses. Eventually her time ends and her husband picks her up and I'm sad. I sulk around after she leaves and the dream ends.

Oh no

I did pray about dreaming sexual things about other women, and hence this explains the influx of Jamie dreams. However this morning, I dreamed I was going to meet this girl I met off Tinder or something. I'm in a strange apartment building, I find her room number which is 316 or something. I go in and everything is pitch black. Being in a pitch black place in a dream just wakes me up.

Odd Jobs:
I'm approved on a trial-basis to work for one of my coworkers, N.
The gig is 'odd jobs' such as carrying furniture for people, or giving rides home to drunk people from bars.
I'm in a camp-like area with a central mess hall for group eating. It reminds me of band camp a little.
White glove-like symbols are marked over doors, indicating potential jobs.
There is a sense of secrecy to it.
The other people in the work-group are mechanic-types and long-established in the work.
I'm a new-comer and feel isolated, especially since I'm the only non-blue collar person involved.
Standing in a parking lot area behind the mess hall, I get a text from N "you in? send a profile pic!"
...
Later I'm in a park-like area. Mostly open grass, but a concrete structure within it.
I'm inside the concrete, resting. It's a cylindrical shape so I can lie down. My hands are cold against it.
My sister comes and finds me, now asleep. My perspective has shifted. I see myself sleeping with a smile on my face.
...
Then I'm in a car, still with the perspective shift. My sister is taking me somewhere.
...
I'm at my Great-Grandma's/Grandma M's condo. My brother and my sister are running a sort of party.
My brother has set up some computer monitors, with one mirroring the other successfully.
I'm somewhat impressed by this.


Sleeping in the park.

‎
Notable substances: No caffeine, 2.5mg dex ~11:30am

Guess I took the dex a little too late, my sleep was so bad. I was conscious most of the night. My watch shows I only had one little REM period for the night which was when this dream happened, I believe it! I should WBTB tonight with galantamine to capitalize on the amount of REM I need to catch up on.



Dream 1

I'm laying down in bed am Tami is straddling me topless in bed. It's sort of the PA house, room on the right in the hall. We're talking and laughing.

I have the dream knowledge that Amit is staying over and is in the room at the end of the hallway.

Suddenly the door opens and Amit is putting a kitten in the room, he looks over at us as I say something like 'excuse me, know how to knock?'. He's saying something about the kitten was keeping him up as his eyes are glued to Tami's breasts. Tami goes over to take the kitten from him and I get up to get Amit back to his room. I feel like the cat was an excuse to barge in like he did, I'm annoyed with with him.

I'm now in the room Amit is staying over in. He has a computer set up on a desk and there are duffel bags full of electronics.

He thanks me for taking the kitten off his hands, something about it was hard to catch. He then breaks eye contact and looks at his hands fumbling with something and starts mumbling, asking me a question. I ask him to repeat himself and he's still mumbling but I hear him say something along the lines of 'can I join you?'.

I think to myself that I fucked up inviting someone over that I work with online, how well do I really know this guy? I didn't expect him to be so creepy. I'm disappointed in myself for having him over.