non-lucid

Climbing to Stability:

I'm at the canal where I exercised a lot earlier this year. It's the day time.
I'm with my girlfriend and we are rising into the air.
I'm holding a rope, and I indirectly perceive that she is holding onto me, or is with me in some other way.
When I will it, a balloon floating up above inflates, which pulls the rope upward higher into the sky.
My girlfriend and I ascend higher and higher into the sky, with the rope being only thing keeping the both of us from falling.
I have an expectation that when we reach a certain height, a support will form so that we can be safe.
...
Later I'm still with my girlfriend, but now we are more obviously on a date.
We are at a sort of marketplace with indoor and outdoor sections.
There is a central register desk with some clothes and other merchandise set-up around it.
This feels sort of like a foreign country, with smaller roads and streets.
I'm following her and I see that her hair is longer than it normally is.
...
I'm now standing in my Great-Grandma's condo, looking at a picture of my girlfriend from the back.
The visual is the same, with the longer hair. Essentially a screenshot. There is a second picture of her starting to turn around and look at the camera.
I realize that my Great-Grandma has recently died (within the dream's story, not really) and I am there to help clean up the condo.
I go to her bedroom and see that my brother and sister are there watching something on her old small TV. My brother is on a futon, and my sister is on a second bed.
My Great-Grandma's bed is empty, but I hesitate to get on it because it looks dusty. Plus, the idea that she may have recently died in it spooks me.
I sit on the second bed next to my sister and join the group.
My sister asks if we can reorient the bed so that it is in line with the TV, rather than the side. I tell her "I sleep on my side anyway, so it works out."
...
At some point later at the condo, I put on a VR headset.
I'm now in an ocean inspired by the Legend of Zelda: The Windwaker, with the cell shaded deep blue colors.
This was some sort of MMO, with many other players occupying the ocean.
I'm in a boat and controlling the world with my voice.
I ask for an engine to be on the back of my boat, and it happens. My speed increases and the whine of the device whirs to life.
I decide that I want to be funny, so I ask for the One-Piece straw hat to be on my head. I find a mirror-like surface to look, and it indeed has appeared.
I pilot the boat over to a group of people and zoom past, while doing a poor King of the Hill accent "dang-ol-motor-boat-I-tell-you-hwat!"
Eventually I reach what looks like a large garage door on the edge of the ocean.
It's currently up, so I go beyond it. At some point I lose my boat behind it and get put back on the Ocean side, with the door now down.
I'm not concerned about losing the boat, but I spy an island on the horizon that I want to swim to.

Recorded after 7.5hrs of sleep.

Fragment: looking down a gently lit stairwell at school, sound of girls chattering below.

Me and my best friend from primary school are in a café (restaurant? Eatery?), waiting for another friend who I haven't seen since primary school. It's a small, narrow, high room built entirely of light-coloured planks, roughly hewn. There are large gaps in the wall like floor-length windows, but with no glass in them. I can see outside on a sort of market scene. There's a shop serving lots and lots of lovely-looking baked goods for pretty low prices, I can see their menu even from this far. I don't know what's on the menu of the place I'm in.

We sit at a table - also made of planks, it's what you might find in a hipster café, sideways-box seats on both sides and a white runner in the middle of the table. My friend and I are chatting while sitting next to each other. I look to my left and see a classmate from my current school sitting at a small table, on a school-style chair with a thin cushion, drinking a cappuccino. I go to the bathroom and when I get back she's moved to my table and is sitting opposite my friend. We all talk for a while before she leaves.

More time passes, I don't know how much, but it feels infinitely long as we keep waiting. He's really late. The light outside is still as bright as ever so we keep talking, discussing him, how long it's been, talking to each other.

Finally he arrives. The two of us have almost finished eating (when did the food appear?). He sits opposite, we all greet one another joyfully. For some reason he's wearing a black suit - not the most likely dress for another person my age. I'm delighted to see him.

I'm sad not to remember any of our conversation, since I know there was one. I really need to work on recalling speech! Anyway, after a short time of discussion, I get up and go to the bathroom again. When I return, he isn't here anymore. She tells me that he's already left. It's only been a short time since he came.

"But he only just arrived!"

"Well, you'll see him again. He said to say goodbye to you."

"I wanted to talk to him more. After all, he's my friend, too. And I've missed him..."

The view out of the window is different to before. I can see the back of the bakery shop. There's a bar bending around a corner piled high with giant, glistening canelés and other baked goods to be sold.

I love Sailor Moon. Does this count as a scary dream? I wouldn't call it a nightmare...

I am Tsukino Usagi (the main character of Sailor Moon) - appearance-wise, at least. It might be better to say I'm alternately watching her and being her. She has one sister and a father who is very controlling and doesn't let her go outside. But one evening, somehow, she manages to leave. As I'm walking down the street away from the apartment, I see my father outside a pub on the adjacent street. He is talking and drinking in the warm light and doesn't seem to have noticed me, so I continue walking at the same speed, head down, to avoid attracting his attention. As soon as I'm past the street corner and out of his view I run as fast as I can into town. It's dark out, and there aren't many people about, however the night this time has a dark brown sky rather than a blue one. It reminds me of an old photograph and imparts a sense of finality.

Some time later. I can see inside the apartment while not being there. Usagi's father is there seething over her disappearance while her mother frets, her younger sister (who looks a lot like another character) sits on the floor at his feet. I get the feeling that they are all afraid of him. He vows to find Usagi and bring her back.

Usagi goes to hide in various places. I see her inside a closed shop, a single dim light overhead. Her wristband glows (when did that appear?) and some waves radiate downwards from the lamp. I know instantly that they are transmitted by her father and he now knows where she is. I feel a terrible foreboding.

I don't remember much after that. I feel that she ends up being caught but continues to plan another escape.

I'm not sure if this dream is scary so much as unsettling. It's been years since I had a proper nightmare.

I dreamt I was in the middle of some crazy military chaos in some densely populated city

Spoiler for gory:

there were civillians in large cages, they were getting executed, shot by shotguns, assault rifles, and then other soldiers came to shoot these soldiers,
and I could see it all the gore, realisticly, sometimes I floated, sometimes I walked around I wasnt entirely corporal, I didnt get hurt somehow

but it was really fucked up, hard to watch, idk how I didnt wake up then



Then I was in some sort of band , me and a 3-4 others , we were friends sort of
we got out of somewhere, a brawl or something, I only had a hammer, each of the dudes had different similarly not too good weaponry
my shirt was teared apart...
It was night, were were walking somewhere on a road, in the middle of nowhere, plains, trees and lots of bushes and grass, only the moon lit up the scene and maybe a few lamps
I was singing a viking song , we talked about the lifestyle
suddenly we were ambushed by 4 or so similar guys, one of them had a spear, the others idk
I fought one or two off, got them on the head with the hammer, the spear guy came, tried to stab me but couldnt, I deflected it with a hammer somehow, always missing only by inches
the other guys were killing the rest of the enemy, I was trying to make an opening
then I made distance , and he threw the spear, he missed, then ran towards the other guys, he apparently had a sword, I picked up the spear and ran
just before he could cut them down I pierced him hard , he fell
one of us took out his phone and turned on the flashlight on it
apparently two of my friends were cut, one was already dead, the other was bleeding out fast but I couldnt see where,
while one hooded guy, the enemy was writhing in pain on top of them,
idk how I felt, but I wanted to do something for these two, honor the dead, with the blood of the enemy

Spoiler for gory:

so I took aim and stabbed repeatedly the hooded guy in the skull, I could hear disgusting sounds of flesh and bone giving way, blood started to gush up like a fountain to cover his whole face

I tried ask my friend where was he hurt, maybe he could be saved, but I couldnt see, but he said it's ok,he seemed to be smiling...
and I just had to watch him starting to fade out
and then I woke up

Fall Town:

I'm the new kid in a town. It's very orange with a fall theme. Falling orange leaves cover my view.
There are rivers flowing alongside the streets, and I'm currently walking alongside one, following it to the end.
I reach the end, and see that the road-rivers all feed into a larger river that people are tubing down. It looks really fun.
I'm on a date with a ginger girl, but it isn't going well. She is upset about something.
...
Later we have found an underground sewer area and we are exploring down there.
It opens up to a labyrinth-like dungeon. There are narrow rooms and turns.
We are being chased by tough-strong lizard men.
I'm captured and I can't move. There is some sort of candy I've found and I try to use it against them.
But the candy is used to control people, and it backfires.

Fragment:

I'm in a large open polygonal space. It feels sort of like Tron aesthetically. It's a hub.
There is a police-officer getting ready to have his first day in 'the maze'.

Fragment:

I'm in a secret upper-alcove area with my Dad. It's similar to an attic, and has a bunch of computer screens giving off blue lights.
My Dad talks to the other people there, and they decide that it is OK to reveal their plans to me.
They give me a newspaper and I read about a bunch of conspiracy topics the turned out to be true.

Fragment:

I'm working at the Krusty Krab, I might have been Squidward.
I'm about to close the restaurant for the day. I need two people with two keys to activate the security system.
The other person there is resigning, so I call for Mr. Krabs.
He comes over, but tells me that he is also resigning.

The DILD Fanclub:

I'm in a study-room, resembling one from my college years.
There is a girl with us who has pink hair. She looks like Ramona Flowers from Scott Pilgrim.
Within the story of the dream I fall for this girl hard.
...
I'm in a place similar to a Vison-Works glasses store.
There is some sort of zombie-game that the class is to play as a group.
The game is a 2D-sidescroller, where the group teams up to fight the zombies.
Glasses are required to play the game, but since I don't have them, I'm concerned that I'll cause an issue.
I go to the front desk and try to get a prescription.
...
I return to the Vison-Works later to see if my prescription is ready, but it is dark. Probably closed.
...
I'm with my friend D at something like a dungeons & dragons night at his childhood home's basement.
Danny from Game Grumps is sitting nearby, and I ask him if he was born in 1989. He replies with something about 90's kids.
I notice D has some software open on his PC. It's an old-style big grey monitor from the 2000s or earlier.
The software is showing a home-page for a fan club. There are dollar values for money to donate to him, listed into themed tiers.
One of the tiers is 'pancankes' and shows a stack with some butter on it.
It's labeled the 'DILD' fan club, which my brain does not connect as dream initiated lucid dream.
...
Later we are outside and it is so rainy that we can barely see a few feet in front of us.
Despite not being able to see, I get the impression that we are in a futuristic city area with tall skyscrapers.
D is supposed to fly me somewhere. He can fly freely, and I need to hold onto him to fly.
I tell him that the raindrops will feel like bullets if we try to fly fast.

The Bulldog:

I'm sitting on a patio chair looking out to a sunrise. I'm high up, a few stories above the ground.
The patio is made of large wood pieces, similar in style to Frontier Land from Disneyland. Within the lore of the dream, we had just built it (my Dad, sister, and I).
I looked at my left hand and noticed that it had three fingers, and I looked at my right. It had four.
I become lucid. The very next thought is that I want to learn more about my dreamworld, to serve me better later.
So I decide to keep looking at my hands. They keep changing in finger count wildly, not fast or as if morphing, more like my brain kept trying to convince me that they had 'always been' said count.
It was more like my perception was in flux than the actual visuals. Tough to describe.
This activity doubles down on the fact that I truly am dreaming.

I decide to get up and look around. I see a man down below in a pool, he's singing on a platform in the middle.
Also, across the way there is another man singing. I listen to them for a while, but I can't recall the tune now.
I noticed a bulldog down by my heel. I feel a massively comforting presence. I don't recognize this dog but I feel the comfort anyway.
He is wearing some sort of skin(or should I say fur) tight dog-shirt.
I remember that I should be stabilizing the dream, so I run my hands across the wood railing a bit.
I notice that the patio is missing some pieces, and get concerned about the stability of the structure.
I decide to go the the side of the house, and once I turn the corner, it represents the side of the house I'm living in now.

The bull-dog is sitting in front of the gate that leads to the front yard. I go up to him and start to pet him.
"Are you a bulldog?" I ask.
"Yes, I am!" the bulldog replied with a British accent.
"Can you tell more more about you so that I can find you in my world?" I ask.
"Ohhh you shouldn't do that...because I have...my issue." the bulldog replies ominously.
I notice he is drooling a bit.
"Well, what is the issue?"
"I....tend to wet the bed." the bulldog admits with some shame in his voice.
I start to comfort the bulldog, but then I begin to lose lucidity.
Instead, I start telling the bulldog a story of a recurring dream. It's about not making finals for marching band back in high-school.
I try to recall the name of the girl who was our drum major who broke the news, but I can't remember her name (just her face).
This isn't actually a recurring dream.
An Asian girl appears behind him as if in response to the story, but she doesn't resemble anybody from it.
At this point I seem to get my bearings, and I start to narrate what has happened up to now, to the bulldog.

"So I've spent a lot of time in this dream letting things flow on their own, observing, doing RCs, keeping it low-key. Do you think it is OK if I try some dream control now?" I ask the bulldog.
"Yes, that seems reasonable." the bulldog replies matter of factly.
I walk forward and open the gate leading to the front yard.
It's night-time over here.
I remember that I want to try the teleport-sprint from another dream, so I position myself on the street with plenty of runway space in front of me.
But there is a festival happening on the street. Lots of people. This prevents me from having space.
I get the impression that the dream characters are not fans of what I am about to try, slightly hostile.
They don't stop me when I went to find a new position, but one guy did bump me as I passed.
I don't visualize a particular place. I break out into a sprint with the night-road in front of me and close my eyes.
I feel my body shake, similar to the first time having a WILD transition. Feels like going through a wormhole.
When I open my eyes, I see blackness. I assume I have woken up.
...
I'm back on the patio with the sunrise, but this time I think I am awake.
"Wow! What a cool lucid dream, I'd better go record it before I forget!" I think to myself.
I enter the house through a doorwall and go to a computer.
This home does not resemble one I have lived in.
The computer has three or four monitors all setup, and looks super cool.
Dream-me has a program setup that will record my dreams as audio, and then auto-tune them.
So I narrate the previous dream as it happened in its entirety.
I mess up the recording so I have to start and stop a few times.
As I recorded it, the computer generated an animated movie, with the audio, as a musical.
The graphics resembled Final Fantasy VII: Remake's.
I'm invested in making the video good.
...
I'm back in my actual bed. My girlfriend is by me, and so is a dog. It may have been a german-shepherd.
Strangely, my sister is at the foot of the bed.
We're awake because we are concerned that there is an intruder in the house.
I felt safe, because the dog would be able to alert us if there was a problem.
My girlfriend tells me I should give my sister the larger pillow, and I tell her that she is already asleep so there is no point.
I reflect that the dog with us is not giving me an allergic reaction, so maybe I can have a dog after all.
...
I'm back at my childhood home, and I'm talking about the intruder with my Dad.
I look at the thermostat, and it reads '60 degrees'. I think it is low, but my Dad tells me that this is how it has to be.
I look over to the living room and see my Mom playing a video game. She's losing so she calls me over to help and I do.

For a moment I see myself: a tall man, dressed in black and with black hair. I'm not myself in this dream, I am him, seeing everything through his eyes. I don't feel like a girl anymore.

A street at night. It's wide enough, paved evenly, though the slabs vary in colour and shade. The streetlamps give off a low, cool white light that's like moonlight. The sky above is dark blue without a single star.

In the middle of the two-lane road is an industrial-looking island, a tangle of thick pipes and ducts that come out of the ground and go back in again, twisting over one another. It's confined into a strict rectangular patch of ground. In the light the curves of the metal are glinting dully. I walk with quiet but sure footsteps onward, past railings and railings and railings, black and gleaming along the length of the street and around the corner. As I near it, eerie music starts playing from one of the corner houses. The house is purplish-grey and has three stories and a basement. On the first floor only the house's corners are missing and covered with a thick dark grey mesh. From here a bright purple mist is wafting out from inside. A purple van in front of the house reads in bubble letters above the windscreen: 'Ultra Shelibatology'.

I pass the house and walk through many more residential streets, across main roads; everything is dark and cool and quiet. Until when passing a garden square I catch sight of a man inside, watching me. He has light hair sticking up in tufts and his whole face is obscured in the dark except his staring eyes. Our eyes meet. Another person walks by in front of me.

The school bathroom. I'm washing my hands in front of the mirror. When I try to enter the only stall, the door is locked, but I can hear people talking inside. Annoyed, I go into another bathroom. There are two stalls in here, but one seems to have been replaced with a blank wall while the other is also occupied. I bang on the door and hear a surprised noise from inside, so, feeling guilty for disturbing them, I turn to leave the room. But this time the door feels extremely heavy and it takes me a long struggle to get it open. As I'm pulling at it my vision seems to black out and I reel back from the effort. When I finally stumble out, I feel so disoriented, it's as if my mind is trying to pull away from my body.
Finally I enter the third bathroom. By now I feel dizzy and can't see properly. Just as I get my bearings enough to register that there is a free stall I also see that someone else has come in after me and is about to enter it. I feel a sort of sinking despair and hopelessness at this. I stammer something out about how I was about to go in there. She takes a step back and offers to let me go first, but I, feeling sheepish, hurriedly refuse and resign myself to waiting.

At no time in this dream - nor when I woke up - did I feel I needed the toilet. It's not one of those dreams that I often hear about. Strangely, this is the third time I can remember dreaming about being in an eerie and somewhat surreal school bathroom. All looked different but all of them left me with a similar feeling of disorientation and unhappy confusion.

Missed Signals:

I'm outside my house on the sidewalk.
There is a man that claims he has proof that I shot someone.
The scene transitions, and I'm now in a restaurant that resembles Bennigan's.
I'm conflicted about whether I actually hurt someone or not, I may have been drunk or high.
There is a work-meeting happening at a table nearby. They are together for a 5-year anniversary. My boss is there.
...
My dad is defending me against the murder accusations.
I wonder (while dreaming) what problem my brain is working through, or what inspired this dream.
But I don't become lucid.

Fragment:

I'm at a game night in a large home. We might have been playing hide and seek.
HM from the tots may have been on my team.

Fragment:

I'm on a grassy hill with someone and it's a bit chilly outside.
We're inspecting the hill for evidence of a person living in it.
We find an air-pipe and water-line device nearby.

Fragment:

There is a battle with a queen-like figure.
It took place in a 2D-platformer game style.

I remember being in a place that seems like an American-style cartoon town. Red barns (like Applejack's) surround a small square and wide dusty streets. They are big, each two floors and then a high barn roof. I have a brief image of being inside one of these, on the first floor. The floor was of light wood boards and the room was large and fairly empty. I feel that there were wrought iron spiral stairs down to the ground floor - though those would be rather out of place in a barn.

Outside there seems to be a small market going on. In the square I examine goods displayed on a wooden table. There are other people milling around, as well.

I was half-asleep when this one came to me. It's mixed in with details of what I was reading when I dozed off and I can remember a bit of a story!

I am in a boarding school - the buildings are somewhat old. All are built in different colours of brick as far as I can see. I'm eating lunch at a small, square table in the large canteen - a little ways off I can see a white brick pillar capped with brown bricks, and beyond it a broad vague expanse. A girl is sitting across from me, but she's nobody I know. She's eating a hot dish - it looks to me like white rice covered with a thick layer of tomato sauce and then sprinkled with walnuts (would this actually taste good???). I notice and register that our school should be a nut-free one, but pass it off thinking that perhaps she brought her own food. I am allergic to nuts.

A teacher (who I recognise) approaches us and sits near our table. As she's talking, for some reason I decide to try a bite of my companion's dish. Chewing absentmindedly, I suddenly remember that I can't eat nuts and spit out the one in my mouth. I see it's been slightly chewed and I feel myself start breathing faster as fear bolts through my body. Meanwhile, the teacher has left some time before without my noticing. Hurrying up to my dorm room I tell myself that this is just a panic reaction and I'll be fine, since I didn't even swallow.

I arrive at the door to my room. The dormitories are laid out along open-air walkways which form a square around a central courtyard and rise for several levels, all in the same white and brown brick: the balconies are white, capped with brown. The walls of the building are brown. A blond-haired boy steps out in front of me and begins speaking, but I push past him and begin heading back downstairs - when I realise I was in such a rush that I forgot to pick up my EpiPen. So I run back, get it, and go back to lunch. But I never suffer an allergic reaction.

Later, a Christmas celebration. Most of the school is crowded into the brown-brick church. It's Victorian-style and reminds me of the chapel on the grounds of another well-known boarding school. Organ music drifts across the snowy churchyard to our ears as we wait for the service to begin. I am outside the church, skipping the service with my friends, the chilly air chafing harshly against my face, and the snow still falling.

I was in the hotel...again, I came to know this by remembering through dream memory, I've been there before.
It felt more like a level Ive completed already.
For some reason in finland, I was lost in this large hotel, it had all kinds of rooms and halls, it was quite ornate, think 17 century french palaces, but a bit less fancy.
Idk what I was looking for, quests I guess...but I knew that there were layers to that realm and I had to switch by them... at one of the doors I encountered the echoes of an enemy or something hostile that took the form of a man, but it couldnt hurt me now, only saw and heard its monstrous echoes...
I went to some sort of dining hall, there were people down there, eating, while I was up there on some sort of balcony, near the ceiling, that was really high, like 200 meters.
There was a girl there, I wanted to ask her for directions but then I woke up.

I've been lazy about editing my journals for posting so I've got a bit of a backlog now. Four more dreams waiting to be posted - including this morning's journal! Nothing lucid yet but it looks like my recall is improving, so that's good. Perhaps I'd better move on to trying some lucid techniques soon.

I'm abroad in a different city. I'm sure this is some mainland European country, though it somewhat reminds me of English country towns. The buildings and walls are built of large irregular cobblestones while the streets are paved in the uneven way that's so common in Corsica (to the detriment of my shoes). I catch sight of a large set of wooden double doors, black, wide but not as high as those I see in Italy and France.

I'm guided to the house where I'll be staying by two men. They both wear glasses and seem nerdy, I think they are a gay couple. In retrospect, I'm quite sure the two looked exactly the same - that, or I saw only one and imagined the second. The two are friendly and I remember them talking and laughing with me. They have brown hair.

I meet two more people later on. One is a businessman - broad-shouldered, black suit, cold expression and an office full of heavy dark wooden furniture, thick books and leather upholstery. He reminds me greatly of a character from one of my favourite series. I don't remember the other.

At one point, I'm wandering the streets in the evening, light spilling out of restaurant windows which display scenes of people leaning towards one another talking, cutlery resting loosely between gesticulating fingers, red wine swilling about in glasses, unfinished dishes on the table. I can almost hear the hubbub of hundreds of conversations jostling to make themselves heard.

It was the last day of elementary school, a lot of festivities and performances were planned in the gymnasium, me along with three other kids, one being a girl I had a crush on during 5th - 6th grade, another being my current best friend I didn't even know back then, and I think the last one was the girl's best friend. We did a short skit, or performance that was maybe three minutes long or something followed by us dancing to either Barbie Girl or a song from the Dutch girlband K3 as ending/credits as the audience would give us an applause! However, we would just continue dancing for the entire song while they kept applauding. We would've done so for the entire 7(?) minute run of the song, but eventually decided to gather in front of the audience and bow, my theatre school instincts kicked in to say "Yes!" as we bowed.

We then leave the gymnasium and decide backstage to hang out together instead of attending the rest of the event (considering it was primary school, it was literally early in the afternoon) We then decided to go to the city, my crush asking me where I live to see if it was possible. Although I was thinking like my current age self while supposedly being a prospective 7th grader, I was still convinced I lived in Utrecht rather than Berlin where I currently live so I'd be good. We went to a supermarket nearby to get some food, but I woke up.

Curse you brain for finally letting me hang out with my crush ;_;