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Last night I came close to a lucid dream multiple times. I didn't get to MILD quite as heavily as I would have liked, but last night I caught myself as I began to fall unconscious and bring myself back long enough to use a mantra for a few minutes before falling completely asleep. All night long it was like my mind wanted to be lucid, but it just never actively grasped that it was in a dream even though it passively acknowledged that fact multiple times.

1) Fragment of walking somewhere in third person. People were talking about dreams as I passed by them.

Dream Signs: being in third person, being somewhere without remembering getting there, people talking about dreams, being around people

2) Short dream where I suddenly appeared in my class room, and this time I knew I had suddenly appeared there, because I was standing up front by the teacher instead of sitting at a desk. I half-panicked as I hurried to take my seat, as if my only explanation was that I had gone insane for a moment and walked up to the front without realizing it. But somewhere deep down something was trying to tell me it was a dream. The dream ended before that could sink in.

Dream Signs: being somewhere without remembering getting there, being around people

3) I was looking to buy a car, and I found that one guy had a special deal going on for light cycles (like the ones in Tron: Legacy). Of course I took the opportunity right away, and as soon as I got on the light cycle, the entire world turned Tron-esque with dark structures set off by glowing outlines and everyone wearing those slick suits. It was great fun to ride around the city, but unfortunately I got a little too adventurous and pulled off a rather dangerous move to take a shortcut down the wrong side of the road, and as luck would have it, the cops saw me do it. However, without ever really being lucid, I thought to myself, "I can just go back in time because this is a dream...right?" And sure enough, I was able to pull back to right before I made the illegal action and take the safe path this time.

Dream Signs: being somewhere without remembering getting there, highly unusual events

Oct. 21, 2011-
Dream 1-
I was in the library with a bunch of kids. There had been a sign outside that has said something like, “If you don’t want to read, feel free to take a nap instead.” One of the librarians decided to show me and the kids the children’s rooms, which had beds and a bunch of stuffed animals in them. I forget one, but the other had some stuffed animals sitting in a circle, one of which I had a sentimental relationship with, and it was holding a small doll with numbers (two and three?) on it. I think it was the doll I had the sentimental relationship with, and I kept trying to hug it. Then, the librarian asked me if I wanted to see my room, and I said yes. One of the kids asked how come I got to have my own room in the library, and I thought but didn’t say that it was because my mom helped build it. My room was painted dark blue, with “I believe in magic” and some magic-related thing painted below it. It had a bunch of trees with shiny glowing yellow lights, like fireflies, on the wall. Abby then saw something and said, “we should save the spiders!” Turns out the spiders were two actual spiders coming out from a tree. I have no idea how this was possible, as the trees were painted on a wall.

Dream 2-
I was back in time, in my fifth grade class. Kids were cutting giant pieces of cardboard. My teacher was saying that once we were ready for class to start to raise our hands, which a lot of kids didn’t. I did, though. Then I saw a girl from my current school sitting next to me, and I hugged her and asked why she was here. She said she was only visiting.

Dream 3-
This dream was back in the library. Maybe it was a continuation of Dream 1. But anyway, this evil person had something called “InstaFreeze,” and would spray it on someone to freeze them. It looked like a computer game when she did so. There were a bunch of light blue squares in a grid, then lines went through them and crystals began to appear. As the person froze, yellow sparks would appear on the crystals, which caused me intense empathetic pain. I tried to close my eyes, but they were still there. Then she froze me, and I saw the same thing, but it didn’t hurt at all.

Dream 4-
My mom pulled into a parking lot and left me and my autistic sister there in the car as she went to get something. The parking lot attendant was in charge of us. Mom had been teaching my sister and I to write (we were both really young) and the attendant asked to see what we were writing. I showed her mine and my sister’s and she asked to play with us. We played, and I didn’t tell her my sister was autistic because Mom told me not to.

Dream 1
I was playing Saints Row The Third and I was around an industrial section of the city. I saw some Luchadores (a gang in the game) and I ran away as they shot at me (I probably did this because of some footage I've seen, where the guy was getting shot but went to fight a pedestrian instead).

Then I went to an open area of road. It goes fuzzy from here so I'm just gonna set the scene.

It was day time and it was still an industrial area. There were people around, someone was wearing red or had something red at this point. Thats all I remember.

dream
lucid

i had a dream fragment last night , i was looking at a wrist watch on my hand the hands were going backwards very fast and i said "cool i must be dreaming"i tried to take control of the dream and stabilize it but it just did not happen i can hear Yoda control control you must learn control

Deleted

DJ Log: October 21, 2011 – 3:00AM (USA Eastern)
Text color legend: · NON-DREAM · NOTES · DREAM · LUCID ·

I am working in an equipment cabinet in the middle of a large field. I have some test equipment in front of me that is connected to a smaller cabinet on the back of a utility vehicle. There are a couple of toolboxes and a large bottle of water sitting on the back of this vehicle. An airport tower is located just a short distance away from me. The field is an open grassy field with a tall fence surrounding the area. There are no runways that I can see. There is a sign on the tower that reads, "Danger! Experimental Aircraft Testing Area."

As I am working to connect some wires inside the cabinet, I hear some strange noises coming from above the tower. I look up to see that some kind of aircraft just lifted off the top of the tower. It resembles an airplane in shape, but it does not have any engines on the wings. The body of the plane has round electromagnetic pads on it which have large wires connecting them together. The aircraft emits a slight electrical humming sound as it flies around over the field. As I watch, two arms extend from the front of the aircraft and unfold into a pair of counter-rotating mechanisms that resemble horseshoe magnets. Once they completely unfold, they begin to emit a loud buzzing sound. I can feel heat radiating from the aircraft as it appears to be performing some kind of ground scanning using these arm mechanisms. As it scans, the arms develop a high-voltage corona around them. Knowing that radar and other types of RF energy are bad for my eyes, I cover my eyes partially to protect them from the radiation. I watch the aircraft for a bit, then go back to work inside the cabinet.

As I am wiring the inside of the cabinet, I can hear that the aircraft is getting closer. The buzzing becomes louder and I can feel a lot of heat radiating from the sky. I pick up a copper plate from my toolbox and hold it in front of my eyes, then look up to see that the aircraft is directly over my head. I wave to the aircraft while still holding the plate mostly in front of my eyes. As I watch, the aircraft turns off the scanners, then comes down really close to the ground next to me. There is a large rectangular plate on the side which appears to have a matrix of cameras on it. I look directly at the cameras and make some funny faces at whoever is watching. The aircraft moves away from me and skims along the ground, then circles me a couple of times before returning to the sky to start scanning again.

I look at the tower again and see that the sign now contains illegible text. Suspecting that I may be dreaming, I raise my hands to do a finger count and wake up.

DJ Log: October 19, 2011 – 6:30AM (USA Eastern)
Text color legend: · NON-DREAM · NOTES · DREAM · LUCID ·

I am walking along a wooded trail, trying to get to my workplace. As I am walking, I can see that there is a river along the trail which is flooded well over its banks. The further I walk, the higher the water gets. As I approach the building, I find that the flood waters have completely surrounded the building. In an attempt to stay out of the water, I climb up on a fallen tree and jump from tree to tree to get to the building.

Once I get to the door, I can see that the roof is leaking really bad. Water is dripping from the ceiling everywhere. The boss is in there, saying that he wants to salvage a few things before the flood ruins everything. I grab a few things off my bench, then walk over to the front office. The accounting person is not retrieving anything at all. I ask her if she wants anything out of the safe and she replies, "No." I look outside to see that the flood is getting a little bit worse. Suggesting that it's time to leave, I pick up my box of stuff and head out of the building.

Regular Lucid dreamsigns
MILD/DILD
I was commuting from work to shopping center, when front tire of my scooter got a flat. So I was walking around this typical California style shopping center with stores lining a big, square shaped parking lot, looking for a tire repair shop. Sometimes I took a shortcut through some nightmarish buildings, where bad things were waiting for me. I was throwing sleeping grenades at bad things so they don't wake up and attack me from by back. I tried to imagine the smoke from the grenades, but no joy. So I backed out from these buildings and continued my search for a tire shop. I met two former classmates, that were not willing to give me a ride and a really rude sales person in a shop.

Then I find myself in a huge 1-story hangar-type building. There are thousands of people - looks to me like we are all kids, maybe 15 years old. There are exits on one side of the hangar, so we form lines to exits. But when we get to exits, they are actually corridors like a maze, that if we do it right, will lead us out of this place, where I felt we were not safe. We follow the kids in front of us but loose site of them. Now we don't know how to get out.

Finally we come to this door. Look out the window and see some grassy landscape. But the view outside starts to move to the right and our landscape is now lined up with an exit to the right of us. In front of us is a wet landscape with mud, lots of wood piled up. We exit and approach what looks like remnants of a firefight. Burned out car and such. Right there is a building that looks like a barn and it doesn't have a front wall. Inside is light up by a lamp and there are military type rucksacks and from the ceiling hangs a sigh that says "Your Employer" and some red and blue military badge. From this I understand, that my group of people were put in this dream scenario, where we are supposed to act out the scenario for someone's amusement.

I see in a distance group of fighters, their uniforms look British, but not modern. Maybe from era when they were in India. They are coming closer to us and we start looking for weapons to protect ourselves from them. There is a bunch of weapons on the ground. I pick a sturdy looking sword and something heavy to hit with. Then they come to us and we realize, that we are the new guys for their unit, the replacements. I suddenly realize, that This is a dream. I look at my left hand, it's all grey and my middle finger is much longer than it should be. I try to make it even longer and it stretches out to more than 10 feet. I start to touch my clothes and leg of a soldier to stabilize the dream. I yell stabilize lucidity, increase clarity. It's getting brighter, like at sunrise, but clarity is not much better. Then my mom wakes me up IRL.

10.20.2011

My Dream Guide Returns (Semi Lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I had gotten only 4 hours of sleep on the 18th and 1 hour of sleep on the 19th so I basically crashed at 8:30 last night. I was sleep walking and talking deliriously and everything. It gave me a ton of REM and extra sleep. Somewhere during the night I had this dream.

I was in one of the top floors of a skyscraper. I was infiltrating a large corporation, they were probably evil and wanted to take over the world or something. There was a party going on. Everyone talking in groups and wearing suits and dresses while they drank and ate appetizers. I was standing on my own observing what everyone was doing. I randomly became semi lucid. A group of people not far from me dispersed and behind them was a girl who looked in her early 20s with red hair wearing a black dress and a large witches hat with a silk ribbon coming off the tip that went down to her waist. I immediately recognized her as my dream guide! I became filled with happiness and relief. It had been 9 months since I first met her and 9 months of searching to try and find her again. She was weaning different clothes than the first time I saw her. Then she was wearing a different dark purple dress and hat.

I ran up to her and hugged her and said "finaly!". She was taller than me. I am very dissapointed that I was only semi lucid. I didn't think to ask her her name or any of the very important things I had planned on asking her. In fact we didn't really talk for the rest of the dream because we were under cover. She helped me infiltrate and spy on the corporation. My lucidity dropped as I followed the dream but I was content to just be with my dream guide again.

Eventually I woke up and was very happy and disappointed at the same time. I had done the one thing that had challenged me for so long but I didn't actually do it myself, she came to me while I was semi lucid like the first time I met her. Also I didn't go through with the plan I had tried to ingrain into my head on what to do when I met her. I didn't know what to say because I was so happy like the first time I met her. Hopefully this will mean she is going to start showing up more and we can start my training like she promised we would. I'm going to start committing more to lucid dreaming again and I will remember to ask her her name next time!

again! it's been a while since i posted, but it's also been a while since i had any memorable dreams. i actually had two, one about a week ago and a few fragments last night.

i'll start out with the dream from last week.

it started out with a view of what looked to be a buddhist temple. it was set atop a flight of what seemed like hundreds of stairs. there was a thick forest in the background. in front of the temple, thousands upon thousands of people were walking up the stairs to enter it. suddenly, i am at the entrance to the temple, which is now empty for some reason, decrepit, and overgrown with vines and whatnot. for some reason, i am wielding a gun, now, an m1 carbine to be more specific. and then, this is where it gets wierd. suddenly, a bunch of chimpanzees in black leather armor come running at me. some of them have clubs, and some of them have guns. none of them fire at me, and none of them with the clubs try to hit me. they just chase me, and i pick them off one by one. it went on for a while like this, a how-long-can-you-last type of thing. the dream ended with me continuing to pick off monkeys.

quite satisfying, because i hate monkeys.
and yes, this is a "long" dream for me.

and now, for the fragments.

in each fragment, one of my greatest fears came to life.

the first one was spiders. i am afraid of all bugs, but i am afraid of spiders the most. this fragment was while i was just falling asleep. i could feel them crawling on me. up and down my legs, on my face. in my head, i just saw piles of tarantulas. hundreds of them, just crawling over each other. it's hard to explain, but i could see them crawling inside my empty skull. all of this was when i was awake. it was odd, i couldn't escape this by waking up, because i was already half awake to begin with.

the first dream was kind of indescribable as far as perspective goes, but as for the next two these are the first dreams i can remember that i've had in the third person. and, for that matter, the first dreams where i can clearly make out faces (the faces being my own). i can never make out faces in dreams, they are either blank or blurred. but in these two, i can clearly make out my face, and even the faces of those around me in this next dream (granted, they are surgeons wearing masks, but....)

the second great fear i have is surgery. and, you'll note as the dream goes on, dying violently. i am absolutely mortified of surgery. i cannot handle the fact that somebody is poking around inside of me with scalpels and needles. i am too afraid that i would wake up, because the entire time i was knocked out i would still be thinking of what happened if i woke up. which makes absolutely no sense and it is nearly impossible that that would ever happen. ah, the anxiety complex.

it begins with me, laying on a steel table, in absolute darkness except for one overhead light. there are three surgeons huddled around me, all male. i have a normal outfit on, black pants and a red jacket. the surgeons appeared to have just opened up my entire torso right through my clothes. who needs gowns, right? i am looking at myself behind two surgeons. i appear awake and aware of the fact that i am awake during a surgery, but it doesn't seem to faze me. now, the view changes to a closeup of the area of my body that has been opened up. i have minimal knowledge of anatomy, but for some reason everything seemed perfect. everything was muscle. then, one of the surgeons took a knife, stabbed me with it, and yanked it down, thus cutting a hole in my muscle that i could now see into. under it, i noticed my ribcage and lungs. he continued to jab and cut my flesh until my entire upper body looked like it had been beaten with a cleaver. there was blood everywhere, and my heart was beating (i was still alive...?) inside my shattered ribcage. the view moved so that i was now looking at myself from a birds-eye view, directly above the operating table. my eyes were still open and i was smiling. i couldn't tell if my heart was beating now, but i really hope that at that point i was dead. now, another surgeon took some sort of oversized trench knife/brass knuckes combo, and proceeded to separate the upper half of my body from the lower. i saw my intestines spill out, my legs fall to the ground, and the upper half of me slowly slide off the table. i fell to the ground, eyes open, still smiling.


my final fear is isolation, and loneliness. the scariest thing i could think of is going through life without anybody caring about you.

again, this is me in the third person. i can tell it's me, because once again i am wearing one of my own dresses, boots, and i can also tell by my hair. my back is turned, though.

i'm in a corn field, although there's not much there because it is winter. my back is turned, and i am sitting on the ground cross-legged. i just sit there for a while and listen to the cool breeze. then, out of thin air, thousands of locusts appear around me. they surround me and start biting me. i have no form of self defense, it is impossible for me to get up and run. i am being eaten alive by these locusts, screaming for help, but no one's there. soon, everything just becomes a brown blur and the dream is over.

yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I was at the playground on a rainy day. I then went to the principal's office, where a vampire that looked a lot like Megamind came to greet me and bit me on the arm (which is where vampires tended to bite me in my dreams at the time). I felt a sharp, stinging pain for a brief period of time and then he left. There was a ramp that lead to a higher level and there was a mummy like skeleton who wanted me to do a quest. I remember that the room was covered in gold and riches. Every step the mummy took, his priceless gold jewelry clanked around. I then woke up to realize that that was the sound of my mom's necklace shaking as she tried to wake me up for school.

These dreams were extremely vivid this time. I was really amazed by how vivid. I remembered every single detail of the dreams right when I woke up, but gradually forgot most detail until writing some key notes.

This vividness perhaps has to do with getting very close to successfully WILDing at bedtime before the dreams. My heart started beating really fast when I was this close, and I couldn't calm it down, so I decided to stop and ask at the forums the next day and went to sleep naturally, and TA-DA! Super vivid dreams, much more than I've had in a long while.

It kinda sucks that I happened to fall asleep in the middle of the night in a not as good as super happy mood because that would've been really great, being that these dreams were super vivid. But no, both or all of them were kind of that awkward helpless and self-conscious doing stupid things feeling I sometimes get in social situations when I'm not feeling super happy and confident like I want to.

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I am in Art Class with Mr. Gamble in the print-making room (not in the room where you paint and print and apply acid, but the other room where you draw mostly). The room is full of students, some of them are standing up, some are sitting down, some are sitting down on impractical objects. I am sitting down on the table near the center, but slightly close to the rack in the corner of the room. I am swinging my legs around, minding my own business, doing nothing, just sitting there and observing or daydreaming a little bit. Lauren, Liz, and Bruce are nowhere to be found thank goodness for me in my waking reality looking back.

Mr. Gamble asks me about something, an assignment that I need to get done, this part of the dream probably associated with my anxiety IWL about completing the pop-up art. I apologize to him and say I'll get it in for sure on time. I begged god not to let him over-talk like usual. Thankfully, after asking me about that thing he walks away. I think he tells something to the class but I wasn't listening. Then I think he walks out the door.

Ms. Taylor is now in the classroom. Then I watch my brother come into the classroom. He has some friends waiting outside the door, the same and more friends as in the dream I had the previous night. He asks Ms. Taylor is he could go out to the food places down the street, as if Ms. Taylor was our mom. I don't question this at all. All I could think about at this point is coming with him. Ms. Taylor says "Yeah, go ahead." I say I will go with them. Then Josef leaves out the door not even noticing me there. I am hesitant to follow them now because it would be weird. Ms. Taylor says "well, go?." I feel rushed and embarrassed, and angry at Ms. Taylor for being angry at me. I run out the door to the hallway and I look down the hall towards staircase A. I see my brother walking back and from a distance, holding a pizza form or box or something, he tells Ms. Taylor that there's a group pizza thing and asks if he could buy it for him and his friends. She says yes, and he starts running back towards staircase A, into the distance. I wasn't able to ask him if I could go with him, and for that I feel frustrated and bad. He didn't notice me standing there speechless and waiting to speak at all! It's like I wasn't even there the whole time! Well I don't think that, I'm really just having vague 'forever alone' thoughts and feelings come to me. I impulsively follow him. Everyone is wearing light winter coats. It is snowing very lightly, and there is snow about a foot and a half deep on the other side of the drive in road of the school on the side toward the park, while the snow in the main grass area in the middle is also either about a foot deep, deeper, or lightly buried that you can see some grass. As I am walking toward my brother leaving the school and starting up to the middle area, I am playing with my cellphone, and it makes a loud noise that I don't even recall now from reading my notes. Then I am playing with some kind of thin chord from my cellphone that could be a part of a headphone. I trip and fall into the snow as I cross the drive in road toward the park, and hide in the snow, for the first time noticing and watching my brother play snowball fight. I then notice that the sliding part of the cellphone and the thin chord has submersed into ice cold snow, and am worried that it will break. I somehow check if it still works. Then I continue watching my brother. I feel left out, and want to reach out to him but he is so far away, and if I did, it would be awkward and embarrassing.

Then I wake up.

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This next dream I only clearly remember the part with Liz eating a butterfly. The rest is a very foggy memory of being on a bus with some awkward moments among friends that I blame on myself.

I'm not sure if we were also on a bus at this part or not, but it appeared to be a dark, small or hidden, location. I am there with Lauren and Liz. Liz is sitting on a bench or some higher seat above me and Lauren, and Lauren and I are looking slightly up at her. I don't see Lauren face very often in this fragment. Both of our eyes are focused on just Liz. I actually remembered completely clearly every single word and a phrase that stood out, that Liz said to us, and our responses. We are talking about butterflies for some reason. Liz says she hates butterflies, and starts eating one. We see her eating one, but it's like a thought form imagination that we each share or something, because none of us think she is actually eating a butterfly. The butterfly looked a little foggy as well. Then, to tease us even more, Liz uses a Harry Potter wand she had laid out beside her and casts and quick spell to manifest a real butterfly. It was a very large butterfly - noticing after waking up from the dream - but none of us questioned the size, we all knew it was real. She slowly starts eating the butterfly, tearing off the wing material from it's stems, one area by one. My and Laurens' reactions to this include super sad partially fake crying, yelling, "NO!!"'s, "STOP IT"'s, and EWW's. I am feeling very sad seeing this happen. In the end, she tore off 3 sections of the left wing. We were all so sad. The butterfly was very beautiful and very still while this was going on. It looked like a monarch, but was blue.

Observation: I seem to unknowingly control the situation in the dream by having hopes about something and worries about something. Ie: With Mr. Gamble, he rarely ever stop talking in real life, but in this dream I really wanted him to not talk so much as he does, and somehow felt like I had a bit of control over this by commanding it in my mind, and it worked! Maybe if I learn to notice these control coincidences and increased law of attraction in dreams, I will be able to recognize I can control things much more easily and thus have a lucid dream.

I was in an anime cartoon from a book I read at a meeting at a college. Then me and all the characters of the book walked up some stairs into a minecraft world. Then, the real world, where we were reenacting Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic, and I became a sith lord.

Lucid - No

Voting

Steve - Angel's Dad

Angel living in her parents house

Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen daring each other.

Kristen Kreuk posing nude

Fixing electrical in house. Went outside to fix fuse box. There was a bumble bee.

In hotel. I was sharing a room with Sara (Angel's Apartment). Our room number was 1550. Angel and Michelle were in the room across from mine. I was drying my hair.

Ice Skating on a lake. After I started skating, I learned that there were very weak spots in the ice. So I had to steer clear. There were two others with me, with hockey sticks. I don't know who they were.

In a hotel room, Angel left a note that said that Kristen was in an accident and she also got pregnant by some 29 year old.

Boot camp running miles on a ship. I went the wrong way. Ran ahead of Angel. Had to get water columns for going back on boat. I thought that I knew I was dreaming, so I placed myself in the front of everyone and started turning poles red (don't think I was really lucid though). Described to Carol and Kristen the perfect theft of going to Mexico.

Faringtonham - kangaroo that can fly

An Italian in Mexico - "me Madre and Padre are in the carro.