side notes

In all my life, I can recall two dreams about dragons. The first was in childhood and the dragon was something more like Godzilla. The second is the following dream I had a few months ago and neglected to post to Dream Views.

I was walking across an abandoned bridge. It was clearly abandoned as there were broken down cars and a number of makeshift shanty homes on it. It was day light and the sky was bright but completely overcast. I didn't see a single person on the bridge. As I walked along the bridge I looked over the edge. Below, on the shore was a forest and more shack-like homes. I saw this rouge-ish looking woman with red hair standing with a rugged looking man.

They spotted me and started anxiously motioning to something in the woods behind them. Out from the woods, crawling on all fours was an enormous gray dragon. Around its neck was a frill of flesh like a lizard. It was around the size of a full sized bus. As soon as I got a clear view of it, I took off running further down the bridge.

I recall thinking, "I doubt it can make it up here quickly." It looked too massive for much speed and it wasn't walking particularly fast. I got to section of the bridge that actually had multi-story apartment-like buildings. I ran to it, turned the corner, and hid behind a cement support column. I thought I lost it. I waited a few moments and peaked around the column.

Rounding the corner, completely silently was the dragon. It was opening its mouth, which looked like an enormous black beak. Its eyes were black with some white showing and it looked intelligent. An enormous burst of flames came steaming out of its mouth directly at me. It was a furious fire filled with wind. The wind generated by the breath, apart from the fire seemed dangerous and absurdly powerful.

I pulled back in time to avoid the flames but the cement column I was standing behind was breaking apart like cheap plaster.

I suddenly had the sense that I was not just confronting a dragon. But something very evil. Perhaps even the devil. The fire was still blasting past me. Some strength started building inside me. I felt the power to strike back even though I was unarmed.

I looked into my right hand and concentrated. A black energy started to draw inward to a single point in the center of my palm. An energetic black sphere started to form. It grew to about the size of baseball.

As soon as the fire stopped, I leaned out from around the corner and threw the black fireball as hard as I could directly at the dragons face. It exploded with such force the dragons head violently flung backwards and it made an expression of shock. I took off running into the apartment complex. I came to a wood door which I entered and locked behind me. The door lock was very old fashioned, and weak. I looked around and was in a run down bathroom. I could hear the dragon forcing its way into the hall way. The flimsy wooden door trembled with its footsteps. I recall thinking, if it can smell me in here I am caught for sure.

-Then I woke up.

Long night full of dreams, experienced vividly, memory a bit fleeting since no recording until morning

23:58 bedtime

remee on, 10 minute signal interval, 4.5/5 hour delay
left remee signaling every 10 minutes on all night, I think it helped me to sleep more lightly. I noticed the lights several times during the night (being awake, I think, or in light sleep) Also, afternoon nap for 1.5/1.75 hours, it was harder to get to sleep at bedtime but lighter sleep and more aware of dreams, but nothing lucid.

00:00 Wednesday 2014-05-28

+ I FLEW TO SPACE! Saw the earth descending and shrinking beneath me, cities lit in the night-time regions, I was scared to leave the area of the earth for fear of never finding my way back again.

+ In the home of my college friends, do lots of stuff there, they have young children, I revisit them later in the night in another dream, they were playing music featuring the instrument that I play, I say "you always play such great <instrument> music," I hear the instrument very clearly, like it's playing a long solo or a concerto.

+ A buffet with very elegant and nicely sized sushi, I think these are good sized and a real meal (I eat one?)

+ I'm designing some animations in a video game, the screen is live before us floating in the air, I'm trying to show my client (a woman) my work to get her to review it and approve it but she just won't listen to me, I see these animations for a long time, I'm comparing my animations to the build-in animations and how they cover the avatars of the people displayed on the bottom of the screen, the animation is called "over the rainbow."

+ I'm gathering up a board game to take with me to play later and realize I've forgotten the dice, I see them on the ground, starting with the 20-sided die, they're probably required to play the game, some guys say yes they're required, I see more and more strangely shaped dice, 8-sided, 4-sided, 5-sided, then really bizarre irregular shapes.

+ I'm trying to close and secure the sliding door of a rented room, trying to get the panels of the door to connect to one another and to the door frame, it's really flimsy, I think I just can't leave this room with the door open, I think I've left the keys in the room, I debate hopping over the door panels to go get them, I eventually do.

+ I'm flying around a neighbourhood looking at cars driving and thinking about where to park.

+ I'm traversing an unusual freeway exit with my wife, trying to choose the right path through to our destination, we're mostly DO and flying. The earth/ground is unuusally shaped, like rounded tall hourglass columns with steep sides, we're standing on top of one and I think I'll fall down one of these columns if I try to walk down

+ I'm DO flying around large indoor spaces, like concrete parking garages, with my parents, looking for the elevator, I know this area is inside a national scientific laboratory, I see portions of large scientific machines poking through the walls and floor of the garage, I see people with shopping carts near cars?

Morning of May 27, 2014. Tuesday.



I am somewhat lucidly walking through the Hall of Mirrors at the Palace of Versailles, which is a “repeat” of a dream section from (earliest) 1974, called “Diamond Cave” in I believe the main variation. I am aware of the prominent symbol of my earthly path. Sometimes I tend to view the symbol as two souls joining as one once on the material plane - or “twin flames” that are as such from the beginning of the birth of the first (even if the second has not yet been born).

I see the ceiling vista as the “V”, the horizon outside as the top of the “T”, and the vertical line of the “T” being both the “door” and its reflection that “meets” the viewer in a somewhat illusory sense, almost implying that one is “walking on their destiny” (or “reflection”) before even getting to it. In one version of the dream, I had become more lucid than usual and simply ran and ran through the “endless” hall, sometimes knocking the arm (or other features) off of a figure. In one case, they were endless arrays of male and female Greek statues in static poses.

There are many ways to look at the same lines, symbols only having the “power” they are given throughout life. The “Y with arms” as I called it when young was of course the symbol of the publisher where I first contacted my wife.

Some unworldly people had thought it ominous (just as some are “afraid” of pentagons, hexagon, octagons - and probably are not so sure about circles or squares either), when it is really only a version of the Yen symbol (for Japanese currency) and I have seen it with both one stroke and two when it actually represents Yen in print (just as the dollar sign varies with either one or two strokes, and that goes back to S and C and other forms of Yin and Yang).

.../something about a film played backwards/...

.../I'm with some friends sleeping all together in a room. I want to do something with a piece of wood. There's a little girl sleeping and we don't want to wake her up. Something about a magnet. We go back to sleep/...

.../We're running in couples with a kid. My wife moves forward/...

.../My wife and kids are queuing up at the stadium/...

.../It's sort of a Punk concert in front of children under 5 y.o. dressed in colorful clothing. The older one looks like 3 y.o. One of them stage dives and falls really bad. His leg gets stuck close to his head. I'm the only adult there and dressed in black. I want to wear some colored clothing. I notice I'm wearing blue jeans. That's good/...

.../Underlining words in a newspaper/...

.../I'm in a familiar dreamscape which is composed by lot of rooms connected with each other. I get to an elevator and see a rough graffiti of a black cat on it's interior when the doors open. I got scared because of it's a known weird place in WL/...

.../I get a package with my new cap a second time. I show my fellow cousin how it was the first time and I try to reproduce the same sequence. I remember the package box. Apparently there was some mistake at the store. The delivery guy looks like a reggae hip hop artist. We are in my grand parents old house. My cousin likes the cap, it is slightly different than the first one. I try on the old one. I see it's deteriorated. The dream scenario changes to my cousin's parents house where I lived for a while before the university. His brother argues with my unfriendly aunt. Once again I live the whole situation. I take the phone and start recording something there before I call. Their older brother hangs up the phone telling me that I should be more respectful or some. I go out and find my fellow cousin out there. His brother goes away pulling a small rolling suitcase. My unfriendly aunt yells something but he shuts her up saying he will go no matter what. I see him walking down the street thinking to my self "he did it again". He still has long hair/...

* Alarm clock went off. I almost fell asleep again before going to work. I remembered that at the bus stop and wrote down some notes on the bus.
* I didn't remember about the package box until I dreamed about it.

Nap after work:

.../A woman with a beehive hairstyle gets closer and slaps my knee, telling me "You will be the Nacky"...

.../I'm putting some things into place, getting stressed because of there's no more time left when the fake artist comes to say me I have to take it easy/...

* I know there was a lot of activity although I cannot remember but the last few seconds before waking up.

8/19/14

Working today from home, after running some chores in the morning. Got so sleepy, because last night woke up around 2am, couldn't sleep till 3.

So I fell asleep on the sofa very fast.

DR
I'm at WL work, only place looks different, more warehouse like. We are moving boxes around with merchandise. Our director is talking on the PA system, telling us what to do. It's 5pm, time to clock out, but she is telling us more things to do. We are pissed and trying to figure out how to do it. Something is hidden in the box. We are talking with a friend of mine.

.../Some kids are sitting around a table discussing the best name for a puppet character which was a TV show during the 90's. They all agree it would be named "Teddy the chubby friend". I "remember" it was always the name for the TV show and I think it couldn't be more accurate/...

* It wasn't at all. The TV show name was "Karina y Timoteo".

.../I see the sequence when a friend of mine receives a tattoo machine as a gift/...

Nap after work:

.../I'm in the room where I lived during my school times. I want to go to sleep when I realize some spiders have built their web between the ceiling and the window. I take a better look and see there are at least 10 spiders in a mass of webs, the bigger ones are deep in the mass, I remember some used to be the size of a little peach . I remember the big ones gave me the creeps. The webs hang above half of my bed, but they are too close that my hand gets stuck in one of them. I decide that I have to clean it up. My wife/ex-girlfriend (who I will call from now on, Simili) helps me. I want to use the vacuum cleaner but I don't remember where it is. I go to my older aunt's room, and see some other spiders there, but they are not many although the webs are huge. My aunt tells me something about some people were pruning trees in the street, now it's all clear to me. I see through her window some webs hanging from the street lighting.
Simili tells me the vacuum cleaner is in my Aunt-mom's room. I go there and my aunt-mom tells me she put it into her closet. I take it "remembering" there was something about this thing. I get back to the room. The spider webs are huge now and there are more and more spiders. I see one of them walking on the floor. I want to take a picture of it. I try to focus the camera but the spider on the floor moves too fast. I can't, it's enough, I step on it before it hides under the bed. When I see the spider webs again I see a lot of multicolored butterflies hanging there too. I have to take a picture of that spectacle, it's amazing. When the automatic focus of the camera tries to focus the image it pulls the webs to my hands. It's disgusting, I put the camera back and all goes back to its place. I try a couple of times more but always the web gets attracted to the camera and it's impossible to take a picture/...

* Woke up remembering spiders used to be a dream sign.

.../after some activity I cannot remember, I get into a police station in the middle of a road. It has been a long time since I don't see those uniforms and stuff. I take a look around, refreshing my memories. It feels weird. It's daylight and we are walking together with some other people. We are in our old school suits.

It's a tiny town after the police station. An elderly couple gets out from a house and have some discussion with us. Somebody says something like "You are not going to dream with your mother!" which sounded like an insult to the couple. We decide to go elsewhere. The couple follow us. They seem to be pissed off. We start moving quick to let them behind. There's a river and a small bridge structure. Some of the guys run along the river. I go through the bridge and get to a big house where a lot of my half brothers gathered for some reason. I don't know many of them. It's an heterogeneous mass of people. I understand this place as "the other side".

There's a stand of electronics next to the house door. Two guys work there. I want to know where can I buy some electronic stuff to work with, I explain because of I couldn't find a proper store in this land. They tell me the name of a market, which real counterpart has nothing to do with electronics. I follow their instructions and get to a known place where I was before. I see a line of students buying some components. Somebody shows me some electronic stuff which looks more fanciful than useful. Now I know where I can find some components and stuff.

I see a woman getting out from a house walking together with a priest, there's something with some pictures and his insinuation. I follow them, and see them getting into a near door. Then I get under the bridge. I see some stairs and go up when a group of delinquents gets closer. One of the guys shows me a piece of leather with a long nail in the middle. Pretending to slap somebody with it. The other one shows me his hand holding a piece of glass. I kick his hand with a fast movement and the piece of glass cuts his neck, I see a big cut and some blood flowing out from it. He got scared, covers it with the other hand and goes away. The other one follows him with a look of consternation in his eyes. I wonder if I'm in trouble.

I get out from the bridge and get to the upper side of the big house. I can see the fields from above. It's a nice view when one of my sisters gives birth a baby on the terrace. We help her to hold the baby. It's all covered with blood, we clean it with paper for architectural drawings. Somebody says in the background it's the best way to clean a newborn. The baby can talk like a 3 or 4 y.o. kid. I don't like how it looks doing that, then I argue that it should babble in stead. It smiles in an evil manner which reminds me my little daughter when she pretends to be a witch.

One of my older sisters says something about their last name. I remember another one and ask about its origin when some aunts tell me to shut up with an aggressive/scared gesture. I understand what was going on all the time I lived with them, and why we didn't get to know much about the other side of the family/...

* Alarm clock went off.
* I'm building a more consistent dreamscape map.
* Some old dreams fragments come to my mind when I think about the market.

Non-lucid, lucid, False awakening

.../We are in my grandparent's old house. It's night, the kids sleep in a big room and I hear some noises coming from the courtyard. I go out and find a raccoon is taking a walk around the place. I'm happy to finally see one of those little bandits. He seems to be not so happy and turns to bite me. I put my leg to keep him away but he growls and bites my shoe. It's a funny situation, although I don't like him to be so aggressive. Then I realize perhaps I won't be able to be friends with one of them under this situation. During the struggle, I take him into the kitchen. I see some leftover food on the table. I want to take it with one hand, but he jumps and bites that hand. He's not pressing too much, I feel his teeth like I was playing with my dog. Then I use my other hand to take the can and get to put it close to him. He turns and starts eating. What a fight! I wake up on the bed and feel one of my teeth is falling, I move it with my tongue then it falls I remember it recently happened and it's always a dream, I stand up and spit the pieces I have in my mouth. I get on the carpet next to the bed and see a lot of tiny pieces I spat on it. I want to make some fun while I clean my mouth. I take the little white stones and throw them to a doorway in front of me. There's a whole on the opposite wall where some of the stones fall rolling. I try to throw them inside that hole which looks like the door of a mouse home. I can see there's a street on the other side. Sometimes when a stone falls on the floor, it turns into a mouse which runs for cover, some of them get into the hole, some of them turn in another direction. The scene is funny, so I keep doing it with the next pieces I still have in my mouth. They turn into mice, rats and little black ones which look like little skunks. It's getting a little bit tedious to clean my mouth because of always there are more and more pieces inside of it. I take a look where I was throwing all the stones, and there's a group of around 50 little mammals rhythmically moving with the movements of my hand. Getting closer when I put my hand behind me and going away when I throw the next pieces which now turn into little skunks. I feel my body is fading away. Now I'm lying on the bed in the same initial position, push my tooth once again. It moves and falls. This time I don't want to waste my time. I stand up and spit what I have inside my mouth. It starts again to appear more and more pieces. Then I remember something I read in DV, something like "Everything needs your attention in order to exist". It's the perfect situation to put that into practice. I stop thinking about the pieces inside my mouth and go through the doorway to the other room. I see another hole the size of my hand in the wall. I remember I can use it to go through. I use my hands to make it bigger until I can go through. The wall seems to be made of rubber. There's a bus station on the other side. When I turn to see the room where I was, I see some guys are playing video games sitting on a sofa in front of a big TV screen. I hear 80's arcade games music playing in the background. I want to see if I can close the hole the same way. I take the borders and try to put them together but they don't fit together. It's a little bit difficult to put the borders together. One of the guys stands up and helps me. Once again I feel my body fading away/...

* I see the clock, it has been just one hour after somebody called to my phone and I didn't answer because of I was falling asleep. I think the first short REM stage is over, so I take some notes and go back to sleep.

This entry is a quick reference for me so I can be sure I'm keeping on track.


Day Practice:
- Constant present moment self-awareness / mindfulness
- Sensory and environmental awareness
- Lucid daydreaming / visualization
- Mindfulness meditation

Night Practice:
- Meditate right before bed when possible
- Read dream journal
- Review memory of the day
- Visualization
- Naturally awaken after dreams
- WBTB if time allows it



Dreamsigns:
- My house
- Girlfriend and roommates
- Video games and movies
- Sudden location change
- Any bizarre events

Reality Checks (preferably in order):
- Location
- Recent memory
- Current activity
- Hands / Nose Pinch / Text
- Review if those make sense and then return to focusing on the present moment



Current Goals:
- Lucid dreams 3 times a week
- Calmly explore my dream world
- Basic dream control (manipulating objects, levitate)

.../I spent the whole dream lecturing some relatives about my nephew's adolescence and how should they deal with it. There is a pile of empty cassette boxes/...

* Fortunately the alarm clock stopped that wasted dream preaching.

* Nap after work:

.../I wonder about how a vampire should put its feet together inside the coffin when I see a Bram Stoker's style vamp getting inside a coffin, everything is colored from pale blue to black. I see the motion of her dress like it is a film played backwards. Then she is invited to wear a hundred straitjackets together to see when she loses her mind. She accepts in a gently manner. I see she's lifted from behind. Her feet and hands are stretched backwards while she starts balancing/...

* Somebody starts a hedge trimmer outside.

.../I'm playing with a table tennis ball, bouncing and kicking it like a pro/...

Afternoon of May 16, 2014. Friday.



Of my 40,000 dreams or so I have meticulously documented and often eventually resolved, this entry takes a look at the English alphabet. It is obviously not complete (the more complex issues I will write about later on) and is mostly focused on my own inherent knowledge and lifelong experience (although some of it is quite obvious). This entry is related to primarily only uppercase letters.

Letter A, because of being the first letter of the alphabet, the first vowel, the symbol for “one” and because of looking like a snow-covered mountaintop, so therefore can relate to both isolation and feeling “on top of the world”, can also represent a “beginning” of sorts. It also looks like a pencil tip or arrow. It can also represent a Taurus, though I only use astrology in a symbolic sense and do not believe at all in the system itself.

Letter B may represent weakness, or being “second”. There are several ways to look at this. “Rounded teeth”, being “second to A”, and others. It can also relate to number 13 because of the image appearing as a 1 and 3 pressed together. On the other hand, it may relate to female breasts, in terms of basic imagery.

Letter C is the “internal” force of Yin and Yang or “half” of Yin and Yang while S is the outer force. Even westerners know this (at least the elite and more developed minds), which is how S and C also came to represent dollars and cents ($ and ¢), in that order. No coincidence. Money is the force that moves the world, similar to how Yin and Yang dominate the spiritual world. It could also represent incompleteness or needing to find your soulmate (because of it looking like a circle with a “missing piece”).

Letter D looks somewhat like a “tongue sticking out”, so could represent gossip or sarcasm, but there is a lot more to it, of course.

Letter E is a variation of “three”, depending on how a person interprets three. “E” can relate to being “average”, or even “mediocre” due to it being the most commonly used letter.

Letter F can be a variation on incompleteness due to it being like a “broken E”. However, it can also relate to “going your own way” because of that.

Letter G is similar to the concept of a “fixed path”, but one which is not yet “finalized”. There are several lowercase letters which relate to the Yin and Yang construct, those being b, d, p, q, and g. Numbers, though not as significant here, being 2, 4, 16, 17, and 7. Note that the idea of “mind your ps and qs” add up to 33, which is 11 more than 22. 33 is a different link to Yin and Yang which I have not done as much work in. Lowercase “p” is “q” mirrored and vice versa.

Letter H can be a ladder section or a railway track section depending on perspective. For me, it represented the Yin force and my links to the Temple of Hathor.

Letter I can be related to the self, as well as a “straight and narrow” path. It could even relate to the “eye” in some way, such as a health concern. It can also be a variation of number one.

Letter J, because of its shape, represents a warning about being “trapped” or “caught”, but not always. It could represent a negative relationship, human or otherwise (because of the “hooked” implications).

Letter K, I have written a lot on regarding the “K-Seal” and the play on number eleven. It represents a special communication from the Source. (It appears somewhat like a sideways envelope icon). It is also half of the “heart on the plane” and therefore for me, represented my validation with my twin flame. Note that when you take the 22nd letter which is V, which in turn is the “heart on the plane” when the twos are mirrored face to face (which also has a “V” in it) and then take the “sideways 3” off the top, you then have the uppercase letter K on its side. Quite intriguing, actually. Far too complex to be coincidental, especially as K is the eleventh letter and V the twenty-second, and of course the additional play that 1 < 3 (one, less than, three) can also imply two (though that is not the technical mathematical usage, but it still “reads” as such). There are so many layers here that circle back on themselves, it can only be long-term planning at other levels of consciousness over lifetimes.

Letter L can probably relate to changing your mind, or, because of the image, may be a variation on the number seven. It basically also represents a corner, angle, or outlook. In turn, it can represent a play on “angel” (because of the similarity to the world “angle” - in fact, my father often spelled “angel” as “angle” to deliberately annoy people or to see if they “caught” it. We had a lot of fun together in my youth).

Letter M can represent Virgo, or Yin, or feminine supraconscious forces. Letter W is a variation on this. Children often draw the ocean as one long “letter M” and the ocean can represent deeper levels of consciousness, including the supraconscious or collective consciousness

Letter N can represent momentum or rhythm or be an alteration of how one views letter Z.

Letter O can be either completeness or “feeling like nothing” depending on viewpoint, as letter O also looks like zero, or “zer oh”, so “O” is actually sounded in the word “zero”, as well as people saying “O” instead of “zero” in a number sequence.

Letter P can relate to being incomplete in one sense because of a “broken BE” or with ideals being high.

Letter Q in my case represented my link to Yin, and moving from the “inner order” to the “outer order” (shown by the line that crosses the circle going from in to out or the reversal depending on your view) in my association with several personal clues and astounding significant “plays”, those being “Susie Q” (and my wife being in QLD at the time of first contact as well as Q being followed by the two capital letters of my last name in this case), and many other more recent ones (such as the omnipotent being on “Star Trek: The Next Generation” as well as representing Quetzalcoatl and my recurring dreams of resplendent quetzals). It also can be a play on “cue” or “cute” or even “clue”.

Letter R can relate to energy in a more complex or “visible” way, though it may also be “too” stimulating.

Letter S is the outer force of Yin and Yang as well as Kundalini energy. In my case, C begins my first name, and S begins my wife’s first name when anglicized. It can also represent harmony as well as a lack of money (for example, in being an “incomplete” dollar symbol). S and C together is completeness: 19th letter and 3rd letter total V, the 22nd letter. Obviously S and C is also “dollars and cents” with a play on cents also being “sense”. (This is even more relevant, to me, the “Yang/Yank” coming to where they do not even use the concept of “cents” - but simply pretend there are pennies or single units - a rather bizarre, distorted scene to be sure - whereas America does not have the “dole”/dollar in the way Australia does, so there you go.)

Letter T is Yang, Christ, Sagittarius, a play on nine, or in a negative sense, a “block” or division in a relationship - relating to “crossroads” (nearly all symbols have opposite potentials). It loosely represents a crown or similar form of authority.

Letter U is either a “changed mind” a symbol for gossip or “refusal” or simply a play on “you”. Note how it also can represent the human tongue. It may also represent refusal to “see” the source, as “you” is a representation of ego. (I do not normally write “you is”, haha, this being a special circumstance.)

Letter V is another form of Yin and Yang, and represents love (being the bottom half of the heart) as well as “V for Valentine” and the 22nd master number representation.

Letter W is related to being with your soulmate or even more-so your twin flame, due to the play on “double you” which is a reference to your “twin” or partner in life. It is also a play on Yin and “inverted” Virgo.

Letter X seems to represent another form of the “crossroads” - some people believe that Christ was crucified on an “X” rather than a “T” or “t”. It sort of relates to a person with their arms and legs out as in either full openness or lack of direction.

Letter Y was a personal clue for me of Yin and Yang. The “sign” that linked my wife and I since childhood was a “letter Y” with a horizontal line through the middle. However, this can also be a play on a lot of things, including an “arrow”, the question “Why?” It could relate to the very next and last letter (“Z”) in asking “Why death?” or “Why sleep?”

Letter Z represents sleep (or possibly death). I even have had dreams where I saw Zs floating above a dream character’s head, but this has not been for a long time and I think is mostly a childhood concern.

I have left a lot out here, but may touch upon it again at a future date.

.../I go downstairs of a house where we live. The ground floor is a huge cavern and I get lost looking for something. It's all dark and I want to turn on some light. The ceiling is high above my head. I find a corner with a light switch. I turn it on and I see a light has turned on somewhere but it's difficult to see because of my hair falls on my face. I remember somebody told me about a big spider inhabiting this place. I want to get back upstairs to our room. I try to free my view but it's a mass of hairs in front of my eyes. I hardly find the stairs and go up, hoping not to find that big spider. I don't know how big could it be, when I feel some spider web falling on my face. I think it could be just my hair. Finally I get to our room. The door is a closet which doors are made of glass. I have to open them with a little key to get in. A soft moon light get through the windows, I see some shadows in the corridor. My wife gently sleeps on the bed. I cannot close the lock when I see a spider which body is the size of a basket ball, running along the hallway. It gives me the creeps, I want to close the damn door but its lock seems to be broken/...

* The dream is abruptly interrupted by one of my kids
* I consider that as a nightmare because of the uncomfortable feelings.

.../It's night. I'm walking on the streets close to the informal market, playing with my shadow on the lines of the slabs. I'm hearing the song Black Sabbath playing on the background while someone tells something about the band/...

* Alarm went off. I know there was more but unfortunately I wasn't able to remember more...

So I don't intend to use this journal for all my dreams but I wanted to start using it at least for the most memorable ones or for side notes about my progress so I can keep track of it and see how I'm improving.


Some stuff about my experiences, I had first heard about lucid dreaming maybe 5 years ago but got really interested in it and started practicing it probably about 3 years ago. In that time I've taken long breaks from it and not had much progress, maybe about 10 short lucid dreams total. About 8 months ago I planned to get back into it with full force, and to truly motivate myself I started working on developing a dream journal app for my phone since there weren't any good ones available (Windows phone). I finally finished it a few months ago and it's the first app that I've ever made, I had some programming experience but still had to learn a lot in order to make it, but I think it turned out pretty well and I'm really proud of it!

Anyway, after I finished it I decided to finally begin working with LDing again and to start things off I began working on my recall by using my new app and exercising my memory during the day. Unfortunately at the time I was quite an avid pot smoker and I think I hindered myself a bit much early on by smoking too much and not being able to remember my dreams at night. I've pretty much quit by now but still smoke maybe once every couple weeks. After about a month of recall practice I started meditating and doing ADA by paying attention to my surroundings and my senses and throwing in a few reality checks every so often. This combined with cutting back on smoking really made my recall improve a ton, from barely any dreams at all to multiple a night. I had maybe a couple lucid dreams during this time but it felt almost like it wasn't really lucidity but just dreaming about lucidity and still going on autopilot in the dreams, so I decided to research on the forums and rework my technique.

What I'm starting to do now is basically trying to maintain a present moment self-awareness/mindfulness and critical thinking about what I'm doing and thinking during the day. I decided that I don't much care for the usual physical reality checks like the nose pinch or finger through the palm because I feel like I could be self-conscious about looking strange around people and be less likely to do them as fully as I should. So what I do instead is when I see my common dream signs, when I'm not being self-aware, or just at random times throughout the day I'll become aware of myself and where I am, think about what I was just doing and what I'm about to do, then really ask myself if everything makes sense. Sometimes if I feel comfortable with it I will look at my hands or do a nose pinch to be sure. What this has done for my dreams already has made them feel like I'm really in the moment in my dreams and more aware of my actions, like I'm actually there instead of it just feeling like I'm watching the events play out on auto-pilot and then waking up to random memories that don't feel like mine.

Also during the day and especially before bed I'll be practicing some Lucid Daydreaming, where I will daydream my most recent or vivid non-lucid dreams, and visualize them again as best I can to change the events so that I become lucid in them at certain moments and act out what I would do when becoming lucid, reminding myself that I'm dreaming while visualizing. I sometimes do it when I catch myself daydreaming other stuff too, or at least just remind myself that I was visualizing and bring myself back to the present moment and go through my mental reality check. I think this practice will have a double effect on lucidity because I will be more conscious of visualizing which should transfer to better recognizing dreaming since they are vivid visualizations and also I will be practicing getting lucid from dream signs, going through proper steps to stay in the dream, and doing my intended tasks. It probably also helps that I am using my recent dreams and changing events in them so that I switch them from being non-lucid to lucid. So far from doing this practice for the past week I've had a couple moments in my dreams where I will be thinking of a previous part of a dream and recognizing that it was a dream, once almost obtaining lucidity because it made me stop to think about it. I think this shows that my brain is beginning to realize the difference between dreaming and reality.

Anyway, I guess that's enough typing for now. I just wanted to get that out there and start a journal so I can track my progress along the way, I think I've got a good system figured out and want to start my baseline here. I'll keep working with my current practices and see how things go for the next few weeks.



Edit: So I just noticed Naiya's MILD tutorial from someone commenting on it and see that it's pretty much exactly what I'm doing with the daydreaming practice, so that is a good sign that it will be helpful!