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I was running through a huge city, with some friends 'Courtney' and 'Jordan'. It was very crowded and we had to really work our way through to this tall glass tower. It was kinda built like minecraft buildings...blocky. We were looking for this man 'Mr. Toya' who had gone missing from this city. We made it to a train station where some enemy agents were holding back some trains. We shot them down then took a train straight for the Tower. When we were nearly there, our train driver was shot and the train de-railed. We lost Jordan for the time being, and went ahead with the mission. First part of the mission was to take back some stolen cash. Like in minecraft, I broke blocks on the tower to make a stairway right to the room where the money was being held. There were two enemy agents there whom I shot, then I took the money. I went back down and gave the money to Jordan, he had caught up I guess. He decided to call 'Gavin' to come pick up the cash. I noticed that on Jordan's cell phone, he had Gavin's number, and I thought it was weird because Gavin doesn't have a cell phone in real life.

So Courtney and I went into the tower and looked around for clues as to where Mr. Toya was at. I found some friends -'Dallin, Josh, and Issac'- who said they had heard some activity in the night near this white van at the entrance of the Tower. I met up with Courtney again and we went to look for the van. When we stepped outside, a helicopter came down and dropped a giant magnet on a cable to lift the van away. we tried shooting at it, but it was no use. We concluded that the government was trying to cover something up. Just then a train pulled up and blew up. We knew it was the government, and so we split up and ran. I kept running and the city shifted into some streets in my home town, Division st and some others mostly. I slowed my running when I got to a round about. I took the uniform from an officer. I saw a police man running toward me, so I began to run back toward the Tower. We were running really weirdly, but he assumed I was actually a police man.

We met up with more officers, and they informed me that they were after some terrorists who had stolen money and potentially killed Mr. Toya. We were specifically after this spy, her name being 'Liza'. She was a lower rank agent than me, and so I played along as a police man. We chased her to the Tower, some other agents were trying to stop us, but we shot them. She ran up the stairway I had made into the tower, but when she reached the end of the stairs, she tunneled forward until she broke through the tower. She tried to jump out, but I caught her leg and pulled her back in. We were going to question her, but she was dead when tried to. The officers moved her over the the pile of deceased bodies, and I saw Courtney and Jordan there.

And now for something completely different. I'll increase production quality in the future. This was just a proof of concept.

??.1.2012

A Real Gem (DILD)

★★★★★

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

She looked at me longingly, as I stood from my seat, the crowds still pouring into the stadium around us. Smiling lovingly, I reassure her: ”It’s alright. I’m just leaving to have a bit of fun. These kinds of gigs don’t really appeal to me.”

Like the dear she is, my girlfriend understands immediately and returns my affectionate smile, ”Go on, then.” Finally, with her blessing I take to the air, gliding up, above the crowds, out to the mountaintop. Rich, sapphire skies and lush, emerald trees rise to greet me as I leave the dark, grey, architecture of the stadium below me. I land in the arena for the previous event, a large, rectangular area paneled with planks of polished cypress and other beautiful grains. Briefly, I think back to the highlighter duel, and it’s laser-tag-like shenanigans, but it doesn’t take me long to start having a different kind of fun.

Whipping out a deck of old yu-gi-oh cards, I summon myself a Blue Eyes White Dragon, and sure enough, one appears before my eyes in a brilliant flash of swirling light, but this is no hologram. It’s as real as I am, I muse in wonderment, approaching the beast with an outstretched hand. He, Yes, he, accepts my challenge for control and allows me to jump on his back. Without warning, the dragon ploughs forward and leaps off the mountainside, throwing us both into an ever quickening plunge. I hold on for everything I’m worth as the ground below rushes up to greet me. Yet, I have nothing to fear, for the dragon is as controlled as it is deadly. Before the two of us can become a single, red smear on the rock-face, the diamond-eye’d beauty opens it’s jagged, almost crystalline wings. We’re flying.

What follows is an exhilarating journey, through clouds and rolling plateaus covered in picturesque, jade grass, stone windmills and thatch cottages. It’s all I can do to keep my grip on his smooth, armored back--especially traveling at such speeds--but I manage alright. My reward is the experience of a lifetime: surreal, exhilarating, yet strangely calming. In this moment, I’m at peace with myself and the dreamworld around me.

Colour Legenda:
Setting| Technique used | Dream (lv1) | Dream (lv2) | Lucid Dream | Notes
************************************************** ****************

I'd woken up in the middle of the night from the sound of storm outside. I lay awake for a few hours, but finally managed to fall asleep.

Dream 1:
I had ordered something that the neighbour opposite us had or whatever, so I went over to his place but he still had to go pick it up himself. So we got into his car (he had 2 baby girls in there too) and drove to the place, which was like some kind of warehouse. Inside, I just took some time to look around, and a really skinny girl caught my attention. She was bent over doing something, facing away from me, and her hotpants showed a little opening right at her butt hole. I wondered if she knew, and if she'd gotten raped because of it.

Then my attention swayed towards another peculiar item: my sister's severed head. On a display-thingie. (for those of you who have seen the film "Return to OZ", it looks like the witch's cabinet of heads) So I looked at it, and it looked back at me! Not like a doll looks back at you, but she literally turned her eyes towards me. I freaked out and looked away again. ..only to look back at it, of course. It was looking away from me, but as I was looking she turned her whole head towards me. Still freaked out, something dawned on me: I might be dreaming, this was just too freaky to be real. So I went over to her (not fully lucid, just the hunch occurred to me) and she opened her mouth and had vampire fangs.

I woke up, thinking how absurd that was and rolled over.. ..straight into SP!

It lasted a whole lot longer than it normally does, and I felt a constant vibration rather than separate waves. I saw all sorts of things but they flashed before my eyes so fast I couldn't really make out any of them. My eyes were rapidly blinking, by the way, I couldn't control it. And then it was over, I opened my eyes and..

Dream 2:
I felt myself being pulled up to a sitting position. My room was darker than it should have been, so I went "Alrighty, let's see what I've got in store for myself this time!" and walked out my door into my living room. It was.. ..different in an awesome way!! My furniture was rearranged into the coolest configuration!! I'll try to reconstruct it in The Sims 3 tonight and post a picture!

I also noticed I had a back yard (which I don't, because I live in an apartment), and swings inside the back porch. So I swung and swung again and let go and soared right through the glass window, into the back yard. From here on, I couldn't actually leave, so I just dropped to the ground and floated up. This time I was just going to hover like some hovering doofus. I went up up up all the way, I could see half the world! Then I figured maybe that's a bit much. After all, space is just mostly emptiness. So I lowered myself again and landed on some rooftop, just as the inhabitant of the house I landed on came home.

He, too, was flying, but he flew up to his 2nd-story window upstraight, not swimming like I do. So before he went inside I just went "HEY!!" and he replied with a greeting and joined me on the rooftop. He raised an eyebrow. "..what are YOU doing here??" I just shrugged. "Doesn't matter, this is a dream, so.." He looked at me in awe. "This is a dream!? ..huh!" he got excited too about the idea.

And then my leg decided to go spasmic and I woke up.

01/19/12

Man on a Ledge
I am on top of a building looking out over the city, I have come up here to check out the view from the top of the office building where my new job is. I have finally found a job, though it isn't the exact job I was looking for. I look out over the city and then I see that I'm not alone there. There is a man near the corner of the building, standing right on the ledge. I wonder if he is considering jumping. I see that he has a little girl. He is holding her up in the air and laughing maniacally. Is he going to throw her over the edge?! I have to keep that from happening! I head towards the man to see if I can get him off the ledge. The man leans forward and falls from the ledge. I am close enough to grab hold of his belt to keep him from falling and taking the girl with him. I am surprised at my own strength as I pull him back from the ledge and onto the building. He says that was too close… he thought he was going to fall. I tell him I saw the whole thing, so don't bother lying. The little girl is crying, I am thinking I need to get her to safety and tell the authorities what the man was doing. He needs to see a shrink…

A few days worth.

Was in yoga class with kara. Rain was teaching the class and Kara gave her a yoga cd to play. Rain kept stopping the class and telling stories. I just wanted to do yoga. People kept telling Kara that they liked her music. I was a little jealous. I was at the yoga studio and the girl that teaches when kris teaches was there. We flirted a little and I sat and wrapped my legs around her. I turned to her And we slowly kissed. I woke.*

I had a wild later where I imagined a scene and was teleported into some house. I kept exploring and stabilizing the dream. It was a house with rainbow type colors. I don't remember too much as I did not write the dream down until later in the night.*


Day 2:
Was in the mountains with everyone. The monks were putting on a show. There were these cool apple fruit drinks that were being served. They were the most delicious drinks I have ever tasted. It looked like we were in the mountains of the gods. Later for some reason I had to be home. I didn't want to leave and felt extremely at peace when at home.*

Day 3:
It was fathers last night and he came to visit. He didn't want to go out and neither did I. We were both tired so he just hung out with us. I met noticing the extra tiredness of myself. Our apartment was completely different too. He went around to check the place out.*

I'm a police officer! I walk down this mall, until I see one of my... shall we say acquaintances? I walk into the shop he's in, and see that he's talking to a very attractive girl. I walk towards them, but when I come close, I begin to walk slowly and pretend to be just walking somewhere else. I try to eaves drop on them, curious of what they're talking about, when he sees me and gives me a push. "What are you doing?!" He looks very angry "Nothing.." I say, giving him one of my trademark genious lines. He pushes me again. "Look, you should know that I'm a police officer now.. and it's a big deal to assault a police officer." He pushes me again. "I'm warning you, you can get in alot of trouble.." He pushes me again. "Look! That's it.. I'm going to have to arrest you." He pushes me again, but this time runs off. I chase after him, sturggling to keep up, thankfully he seems to be running around in circles around the shoping centre carpark. I grab hold of him, and tell him to turn around so I can put the handcuffs on him and arrest him. He's uncompliant, so I shove him to the ground, revenge is sweet. "Spread out on the ground!" I shout, I reach back for my handcuffs. I look to my left, and to my right, my belt is empty! You've got to be kidding me I think. I try to mantain my confidence while I tell him to keep still, so he doesn't find out. Typically, however, he does, and runs off far far away. I'm faced with a menu like in tom clancy's rainbox six vegas 2: "start from checkpoint, return to main menu" I choose start from checkpoint and find myself back in the shopping centre, with the guy just about to take off. This time I look down, and find my belt with the items I need. A tazer, a gun, handcuffs, and a big instruction manual. They're in awkward places though, for example my gun is WAY down my leg, making it very hard to reach, my handcuffs are at the back of my belt, as if I had stretchable hands. My tazer, is in a good place, but it's still wrapped in plastic, with the batteries waiting to be places inside. I decide to fix everything up, and wait for him to get away, so I can restart. I choose start from checkpoint once again, and begin running after my acquaintance. I look back and see two other police officers running about ten metres behind me, in the same direction. However, they turn out to be trying to get someone else, I ask for help anyway. "Can you guys split up, one of you can help me, and the other can still get your guy." The seem to agree, and the fat one of the two turns to come my way, but I say "Can I have the skinny one, there's running involved." Even though it doesn't make sense, considering they were both running at the same rate before, and we all have to run anway. They don't seem to mind though, and the fitter one comes with me. We both run after him, and we're very close, when he changes directions all of a sudden. My partner doesn't miss a beat, but I'm put off, and it takes me a while to get back on track. I turn the corner and see the guy has already been handcuffed and is being read his rights. "Book him dano" I say, trying to make a joke out of it, and hide the fact that I'm sad about not proving myself as a cop. He's taken away, so I look around for another oppurtunity to prove myself , this time with my tazer drawn so they'll listen to me. I have no luck, and I wake up

-next dream-

I can't remember how, but I become lucid, someone tells me I''m pretty sure. I summon a badger. I wake up.

-next dream-

I become lucid again, can't remember how. This time I focus on deilding after I wake up from a lucid. Doesn't work.

-Next dream-
I have this bow and arrow thing, and I'm sitting in the sunroom of my house with dad next to me, with it drawn. It pulls back REALLY far! I ask dad where I can shoot it. He points to the door leading into the sunroom, the one with wire mess through the holes from the frame. The wooden arrow snaps in half (not sure why) before I can shoot it, but I release the string with tension on it anyway, and suprisingly it fly straight for the door, and hits dead centre in the mesh. "See, I told you it was accurate" dad says.

-next dream-

I know this one was fairly long, I can't remember what happend, but I was in like an animated world with talking animals, and they wanted me to do something..

Because so many people report that they got their first lucid dream while taking a nap, I decided to try that route today. I started by taking about a half hour to do some induction work—progressive relaxation, primary center stimulation, binaurals, etc.—and then listened to William Buhlman’s chakra guided meditation. Noticed going into the meditation room that this was at 3:59 pm. But I only got as far as Bill asking me to envision the root chakra when apparently I dozed off.

I didn’t know until I got to a point in a dream where I was going back to my car. By the car on the trunk side, a young man and woman I didn’t know where talking. When they saw me coming, the young woman pressed herself onto the closed trunk so I would have more room to pass, which was silly; better to have moved out of the way altogether, of course. Rather than participate in that, I walked about the front of the car and let myself in with my key.

Once I was seated, I realized the driver’s side window had an enormous crack in it. I ran my finger along the crack, which revealed the whole window was now loose in its frame. My car must have been broken into! In that same instant, I noticed the radio was playing and the cognitive dissonance of it all made me feel something like an electric shock. Simultaneously I remembered that it was all okay, this wasn’t my real car—and I think I must have been on the verge of realizing this was a dream car. My body began coursing with energy. But instead of going lucid, I began to see a familiar set of images that I associate with hypnogogia, in which I’m seeing something like an Persian carpet except that the patterns are actively moving across my field of vision.

Unfortunately at that point I had become aware of my body again, and the whole experience just evaporated. I looked at the clock and it was 4:51, so I’d been snoozing for nearly an hour when this happened. This may not seem like much, but I’m really glad for it; in three months of trying to have a lucid dream, this is the closest I’ve come. I figure I was either semi-lucid, or lucid for just a couple of seconds.

"Nicholai....
Nicholai..." A soft voice melded with the background of the kitchen, over sized by the perception of an infant.
"Nicholai..." This was his name. Who was calling him? Suddenly he thought, suddenly he existed. Now his sole purpose was to discover the one calling him. The voice, the tone, the timber... He knew it. His mother. His mother was the one calling to him. Muscles on his face moved, shaped, morphed themselves collectively to form a smile. He was fond of his mother, he loved her. What child didn't? This new form of ability allowed him to move, to walk, to turn in order to face a hallway where the sound originated. There was the shadowed face of his mother, hidden by forces unknown to him.
"Nicholai..." His mouth was dry and staled with the taste of sand, his eyes burning of salt. The sound of heavy breathing pervaded his sense, it was him. It was his own lungs gasping for air.
"Nicholai..."

Nicholai's eyes opened only to stare down at a moving wall of sand. Immediately he was concerned for his own safety, worried about the sudden disorientated amnesia that faced him. He was being dragged unconsciously. The muscles of his neck screamed for reprieve, but he must look to face the world before him, to know. City blocks lay before him, buildings worn with decades of decaying sand. They were taking him through a ghost town. Who were they? Ignoring the second barrage of messages from his nervous system, he looked to his left to face a large man, heavy built, face covered by a bone mask. The rebels. Memories came back to him slowly. He was now an outcast, meant only to face a short, empty life. Why were they taking him here? Casting as many glances around as he could manage, he noticed one thing, or, one lack of thing: life. The small group of five armed men, not including him, were the only visible inhabitants of this large desert city. Where was everyone?

Feeling came to his ankles suddenly, they were turning. Gaze turned once before him, he noticed they had begun heading towards a small home. Why this one? Five minutes of consciousness and he was already riddled by the complexities he now faced in life. The leading soldier, presumably an officer, dusted off the sand-caked pad to the left of the doorway to reveal a home interface, still gleaming in the sunlight. Pressing his palm to it, a wall of clay fell to the ground in a cloud of puff to reveal a siding door, now open. The group continued onward, carrying their unwilling prisoner inside. There was a damp, pungent smell to the building, only detectable by those who spent large amounts of time out in the dry, desert air. It was the smell of humidity. Nicholai assumed that the building had kept in the water that had evaporated, due to the fact that almost all of the dwellings on this planet were airtight. Oxygen and water were fed in and recycled through a series of underground pipes, smarter than relying on the harsh atmosphere outside.

A soldier on corner duty spoke up quickly, mentioning something about 'them'. Niko turned just enough to see him out of the corner of his eye, catching the movement of the holographic scanner in his hand. An opaque, green-tinted replica of the city floated in mid air, covered in a small portion by red blobs. Niko had seen these portable interfaces before, even used and repaired them, this much he could remember. One fact in particular stuck out in his recollection: red almost always meant bad. Before he could gather more information, screaming sounds of engines rang throughout the home. An aircraft of some kind was outside, and close. Several of the soldiers began speaking at once, and all of them brought their weapons of choice to bear. The leader began giving hand motions to his squads, followed by commands. The group politely ended their jabbering to listen, then did exactly as they were ordered, even the part about dropping Niko, who fell to his knees only to realize he wasn't bound as he had first assumed.

As he shifted his weight in order to run, the door began to creep open. One soldier of a lower rank pointed out the obvious.
"They're here!" Just as the first shot was fired, Niko was on his way to the second room. Scrambling to find a weapon of some sort, he vaguely noted the stove to his left. A kitchen, kitchens meant knives. Quickly coming to the conclusion that they'd be stored, he systematically began ripping drawers from their grottoes, but the dying sounds of the gunfight only a door away meant that he'd run out of time. He turned to face a soldier in the doorway, rifle at the ready. Quickly putting his hands up, Niko did his best to look out of place, which wasn't too difficult.
"I'm not with them, they took me! They beat me!" In his current state, he looked ragged enough for the story to be true. The soldier stepped toward him, still not entirely sure.
"Are you injured?"
"Yes, yes! I need medical attention!" It was working well so far. Niko dared to step towards the soldier, lowering his hands. The man didn't seem to notice.
"You don't look too beat up, I'll need your help. My friend is hurt back there." The soldier turned for just a moment to gesture towards the other room, but it was enough time for him. With a quick step, he had on had under the shoulder of the soldier, pushing him off balance while the other was retrieving the knife on the shoulder-pad of his armor. Within a second, it had been done, but the soldier was fast. By the time Niko managed to get the knife at the ready, the soldier was coming at him.

Niko side-stepped a blow from the butt of the soldier's rifle, only to make a failed lunge at the man's exposed jugular. The knife glanced off of the hardened armor, and his wrist was caught in the man's grasp. Had to give up the knife already. He put his foot between the two of them, pushing off as hard as he could manage with one foot. It sent the soldier tumbling into the other room with the knife, just enough time for one move. Turning to survey his options, the first glance caught a gamble: the last kitchen drawer. Rushing to it, he jerked it open to reveal a full stock of knives. Jackpot. They weren't combat knives, of course, but they would kill all the same. Niko grabbed two at first instinct, both sharp and non-serrated. He faced the door only to experience a bit of deja-vu, the soldier was coming back for more. Niko was on him before he could act, however, reversed blade in his right hand, and the second blade for blocking. The man had given Niko more time earlier, for he had searched and found his ill-used combat knife, and was using it as a deterrent for close-range combat. As Niko neared, the man swiped at him, just grazing his left bicep. Niko punished him for it, though, as he drove the first knife into the left side of the soldier's neck, then the second knife entered under the protection of the armor and the ribcage, puncturing a lung.

After several moments of stillness, as if they were locked in an embrace, the soldier crumpled into a heap, blood leaking slowly onto the floor. Niko went over his weapons, deciding it would be better to take the combat knife and leave the others. It would be hard to carry a trooper's rifle inconspicuously. Niko took a long stare at the still-glowing eyes of the soldier's armor, feeling the rush of adrenaline slip away. Before he began to feel remorseful, he turned and exited the kitchen. Now for the second trooper. Niko wasted no time searching the house for him, he had, without a doubt, attempted to escape the city on foot after seeing his comrade attacked. He guessed that the rebels that had brought him here hadn't survived the initial firefight, and that just made his life a little easier. One last sigh left Niko following a set of footprints, made large by the scout's boots. It wouldn't be difficult to track him down, and maybe he could get to civilization by doing so. He gave one last look at the city, behind him now, before he slid the knife into his boot and carried onward.

dream : comments : lucid

January 20th, 2012

My recall has been pretty bad these past couple of days for some reason. I haven't been remembering any dreams before about 6am. I got my galantamine today though, so we'll see if that has any impact!


At a camp ground, someone was getting the shit bashed out of him by a bottle but he deserved it somehow.

-----

I was hanging out with Michel Gondry (!). He showed me a short film called 'Widen' and said that if I understood it, I could help him with his next feature film.
We were in a bedroom and he started by drawing three rounded pillars on a blackboard and asked me what they were. I said I thought they were people and he seemed disappointed in the answer. Then the movie started.

There was a scene in a kitchen where fruit and veggies and eggs were all bouncing around on the benchtop by themselves and started cutting themselves up. Then there was a part where these guys were pretending to shoot guns with their fingers. All of the footage was intercut with images of a sad guy sitting at a train station.

Pretty standard Gondry, basically


I didn’t get it.

Self Esteem

We were skating around some strange place with my friends. There has been a giant recent loss in self esteem for some reason in the whole world. Me and the guys decide to hang out in someone's house which I remember as being pretty well furnished. Since I was the most confident in the group, I had to go get the snacks. Everything is kinda dirty on the way out, I arrive at this guys store. He's a fat middle euro guy behind a glass kind of shield. Asks me what I want and the first thing that I ask for doesn't need to be paid for so then he spends a long time complaining about how I never pay for anything but then I remember that I have to get snacks so I get a shit ton of candy bars and two giant bags of mini resee's and then I poke fun at him "I never buy anything?" we joke and laugh and on the tv a news story comes on about the crisis in the world's loss of self esteem. I found it upon myself that I had to be a hero for the world and have more self esteem than everyone else and somehow save the day.

Rock Fights and Boarding

Was with my mom outside what kinda reminded me of a place near my house. she gets really mad at me so I have to follow her to figure it out. I get on my knees slowly and try to explain my recent anger. She silently brings me on this double decker coach bus which was the local transit in the dream the bus drive is mad at us fr talking forever but the new money system was hard to figure out. the door finally goes through and we go to the mall which is much more grandiose and modern looking than it already is. She walks me to rainforest cafe, all the time I was asking, with no reply what she as doing. So I guess we're gonna have a talk here. Some reason I leave, find the car and drive it back to another neighborhood. I go back to my house, which now i so a really steep hill. There is a strange knife fighting asian guy who wants to kill me. We fight for a while, swing our knives at each other, dealing out heavy blows. I have a "hunting rock" which I know with three good blows to the head will kill hi. Instead I keep aiming for his ribs...i don't want to kill him. I've hit him twice on the head and multiple times in the ribs. I hit him again in the ribs and can hear his ribs crack. He chokes up blood and goes limp. I back up a little and he jumps out. He was only pretending. He comes at me and something in my mind changes the dream is flickering and I was half waking up. I realized that I was dreaming and became lucid. Something about this lucidity was really weird though. The dream was still flickering and fading and I was still slightly waking up but I didn't try to stabilize the dream. He hit me over the head with something and I acknowledged the pain and then ignored it. I give him one more great hit in the ribs. he's done. I think his father was around to pick him up and go. I forget it's a dream...I get out of the house and the down hill looks really good as a long-boading thing. The hill is really traffic-y and cars are going down really fast in waves toward this tol booth thing. I see that my longboard is down there leaning on a tree, when I get back there I realize tha I left something up at the house, I start walking back tot he house but decide I don't need it, look back and my longboard is gone. I freak out for a long time but then my mom drives by and gives me a backpack with my longboard. its some move of reconciliation from an earlier fight. I go down the hill boarding

Herpes

. I'm with this one black girl that I've met, kinda chunky but I'm still diggin her. We back into an alley way get out of the car and into this door. We were in there for a long time and through a window I can see my car. While we're talking I see that a bunch of cars are trying to pass mine but they just stop. They're trying to pass it on both sides but my car is blocking them. I forget it and start making out with the girl in her room (which is a replica of my room). We really start going at it and were both shirtless and kissing all over. Before I take off her underwear I ask if she has herpes and she barely answers and I assume she does and I ask if she's having an outbreak, she says yes pulls down her pants and shows me it. I say I can't do it and go to get dressed. She's noticeably frustrated and angry as I walk around the room and pick up my clothes and put them on. She pulls up her pants while lying on the bed being all pissy. It was weird because there was one second where I looked at her and she was 10 times hotter than before, then it was back to normal. She wasn't ugly, just average. I go outside of the room and see that my car windows have been smashed and the whole car was stripped and pushed to the side so that people could get through. The car weakly starts on the second try but can't stay in park and the emergency break barely works. As I get back out of the car and then back into the house, I can hear her frustrated screams from inside "I get half way 3 times a week but I can't get fucked!!?" I cautiously go back inside telling her about my car and she's mad at me and tells me she can't deal with it now. I accidentally go into another room (which would've been my mom's room) but it was where her dad was sleeping. Also, I could hear one of her parents with the tv on the whole time before this but that was no big deal. The dad, with messy covers drawn over him in the dim room looks at me and says "oh its you, the [something wispy like smoke I think]" I say I am not one of those and try to head back to my car, I want to turn back and say that I lived here before they did but I don't...

I'm going to write a bit longer dream today from the past - the recall still isn't good, but at least I've returned to monophasic sleeping lately.

Mom's Diner - Just Kill Me Already
Date: August 21th, 2009
Lucid: Yes
Method: DILD

I thought I was at home, but there were some guys from the army doing some kind of ice...thingie. There was a pool made of concrete and the guys were pouring ice-cold water into it for it to freeze. For some reason I decided to jump into the water. I didn't feel the coldness, but the water started to freeze and resist my movement right away. I asked the army guys to help me up and luckily they did help me out of the pool. I was wondering whether I should help the guys in this freezing thing they were doing, but then they started talking:
"Have you tasted mom's delicacies yet?"
"Nope."
"Well go have a taste!"

I had changed into army uniform and the place overall resembled the garrison I had been a year earlier in reality. "Mom" was apparently some diner runner there. She seemed to be really liked. She actually looked like one lady that indeed did work in the army in reality. Nobody called her mom though.

Still I had not actually seen her in the dream though (just getting ahead of myself). I was at the door of the place and there was some kind of candle rack (is it said like that?) that I managed to accidentally cause to fall. Actually this resembles again a real-life situation - in the army I did back into a flower stand and the jar where the flower were broke. I guess that embarrassing situation left strong marks into my subconscious. Anyway the "Mom" was there looking at me like I'm some kind of madman. I apologized for tipping that rack over and was relieved that I didn't break anything.

I wandered around the place a bit. There were plenty of free tables, but I didn't find any place where to order anything. I ventured even further and then realized, that the "diner", wasn't any diner but more like a department store. There were a lot of small shops and stuff. For example there was Mom's kiosk, where you could get some food for travel, at least according to it's slogan. I kept zig-zagging the place. Finally I ended up in the other side of the place and went out from there.

People were going to some stadium outside. It resembled Berlin's Olympic Stadium, at least according to my notes, even though I have no idea what Berlin's Olympic Stadium looks like. The place was shutting down because Mom was going there. I gotta say that all of the people just talking about this mom made me very curious.

I went back into the "diner"/department store and looked for the kiosk. I planned to buy couple of chocolate bars to at least have something to eat, even if not Mom's acclaimed food. But no, the place was just shutting down. One of my former classmates was there gathering up things. What, he now works there? My brain works in a fucked up way sometimes... I felt like stealing the chocolate bars, because of this unfortunately timed closing time, but I ended up deciding against it.

That was when I realized, that I had been in the store for a long time. I started to wonder whether I should be back with the dudes at the concrete pool who were doing the freezing shit. Wow, amazing consistency in my dreams. This is the kind of dreams I'd like to enjoy while lucid, dreams where everything holds together, is logical and stays consistent. Too much to ask for, I guess.

Because even while this wasn't yet lucid, the logic and consistency of it sort of died right there. I went out of the store and where was I? At the local community center's front yard. I realized that this wasn't possible. Lucidity was inevitable at that point. The dream also (unsuprisingly) really started to lose it's quality.

There's a road going in front of it and I saw multiple trucks coming there. They really drove in wildly and had the trucks slide sideways because of turning too much, etc. Some tough-looking dudes came out of the trucks when they finally had stopped. The gang surrounded me. They were armed with assault rifles, though hilariously some of them had that red end that toy guns have at the end of the barrels.

They started acting all tough on me. Me being lucid I had zero fear, so I just acted tough back. Shame I don't remember the dialogue exactly. He was pointing his rifle at me and I just dared him to shoot me. I really pushed him. I ordered him to shoot me. I wanted to die. Yet he just kept threatening, instead of doing it. I realized he was not going to do it unless I do something more drastic.

I grabbed one of his gang members under my arm and threatened him. "Unless you shoot me, your friend is gonna suffer!"

Instead of shooting me like any sane thug would have done, he just reversed it. He said that my friend is gonna die if I don't stop - and as "my friend" he referred to the guy I had just grabbed. What the fuck? That's the worst illogicality I've ever seen in a dream. Dude, it's your friend, not mine.

I resiliently kept pissing him off so he finally obliged me and pulled the trigger. The gun just clicked. It was empty. He didn't even have ammo this whole time? What a retard! Besides, this already happened in my earlier dream (I just realized this). I guess empty guns are a dream sign for me. Then again, any guns at all are a dream sign for me. Anyway, I figured that I'm not going to get killed here, so I tried to pull out a gun from my pocket using passive control, just "knowing" it is there. It didn't work.

I tried to throw myself into the ground again as I noticed that the dream was crumbling fast. I ended up into my bed in a false awakening. I did like a million reality checks and by all means I should have realized I was still dreaming, but I still went to the kitchen to look for some more evidence. Too bad I was in a tight timeframe anyway, as I woke up then.

Don't remember anything except having a wild a day or two ago...recall is so bad that I only remember the transition of falling through my bed

Last night's dreams consisted of various "episodes" or "segments"---which is somewhat unusual in relation to my normal sleeping habits. I might have been woken up several times. That night I also slept for an inordinate amount of time.The order of these events is somewhat ambiguous, I believe they go in opposite order in time, but here it goes:

1) My boyfriend wants me to hook him up with a hooker. She's running on wet asphalt with pink heels. This has something to do with a comment he made in real life about getting a blowjob from a hooker in Amsterdam as a "souvenir." That comment really upset me lol.

2) My grandmother tries to "justify" the previous situation because "we can build a castle on the balcony because that's what you did with your last friend."

3) At some point in my apartment, me, my boyfriend, and his two brothers are all sleeping on my bed--I between my boyfriend and his twin. For some reason I'm attracted to his brother even though I'm not attracted to him in real life.

4) I'm on a high-speed train located in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil that goes to international locations--maybe continents. I get off the wrong one--this happened in real life when I moved to Brazil.

5) Some of my old friends that I knew in Brazil are climbing a sand structure in a Minecraft environment. For what reason I do not recall.

6) I find a huge sand cave in a Minecraft environment--belonging to a girl--the middle of which lies a chair and a piano.

7) I'm on a tour somewhere

I was in the school gym. There were lots of mats spread out on the floor. My class was grouped in a corner on one of the large mats. I tried keeping up with the exercises but my legs were hurting, and I could barely walk, let alone do jumping jacks. I just waited on the floor for everyone to be done (some people were sitting anyway). After that I had to move to my next period, which was Spanish in the dream. Outside of the gym was a machine that gave out free ice cream, but there was only a few in it and everyone wanted some. I inched through the crowd and grabbed a chocolate bar. I unwrapped it and ate it while walking down the hall. The school looked so unfamiliar. I came to an outdoor section of the school, and realized I went the wrong way. I also saw my old language arts teacher. There was a table, and i remembered that I had to pick up a slip for something for school. I went back the way I came and wound up in the front of the building. There were a lot of people gathered here. All of a sudden a huge train pulled in through a gate next to the entrance. It was one of those really old steam powered trains. One kid got off. Apparently his dad owns a private train and was just driving his son to school. After it parked, the top of it made a flat path from the ledge I was standing on, so I jumped on top of it and a few others followed me. As I got closer to the back of the train, it got harder to advance forward. There were ledges to hold onto, but they were awkwardly placed. I almost fell off, but my alarm woke me up before that.

It started with me walking through the mall, the one in my hometown. I was by myself, but i got a phone call from a friend who lives in another state.

"Hey where you at?"

"I'm in the mall, on the side with the food court"

"Okay, i'll be over there in a second"

So i just kind of wandered around on that side of the mall until i saw him coming towards me. Then i walked over to him, and we shook hands and started walking to the other side of the mall. We just kept walking and talking. I remember him wanting to go into Hot Topic, which threw me off a little, because he wouldn't shop in a store like that. Then we just kept walking, and i remember seeing this line of people waiting for something in the middle of the mall. The line lead nowhere, they were just lined up in those dividers for lines they use in fast food restaurants.

I got in line, and once i was in line it was like my friend who i met up with was gone. But i didn't think anything of it, i just stood there in line. Then i saw another one of my friends from high school walking towards the line. He was with a few people, i wasn't sure if i knew them or not. Maybe they were just DC's. He walked up to me and shook my hand, and then we started talking.

"Hey what you doin' in here?"

"Just standing in line."

What should have threw me off was the fact that he had on a shirt from my university, and he's not even in college. He said something about being on the football team and the people that were with him were also. I asked him how'd he get into my school, because i remember him not giving a fuck about his grades....

"Man, i had straight A's my senior year, so they let me in. Now i'm on the football team."

At this point i was really thrown off and thinking to myself...
"This muthafucka did NOT have no damn straight A's...and he damn sure not good enough to be on our college team..wtf..."

So i did a quick RC, i plugged my nose and i was still breathing. Between that, and all the other dream signs i should've become lucid. But i didn't, i just remember still standing there in line until the dream ended....