All DJ Entries

I am in a huge room. The floor is white and black, like a huge chessboard. Near the door there is a grand piano. I think there was someone playing it. I become lucid. One corner of the room looks like our sitting room. I go there. The dream feels a little blurred so I rub my hands together. That helps a bit. I had decided to do the totms when I went to bed. There are some people in the sitting room section of the hall. In front of me theres an ugly man sleeping in our chair. Well, he's ugly, but he is closest to me and just DC, so why not? I kiss him quickly on the cheek. Next I start to try making a wormhole for the advanced task, but I wake up before I can complete it.

I'm in our social studies classroom. It is bigger than usual. Also the desk is bigger than normally. I leave the classroom. Theres a transparent pipe in front of me. It takes me to the school building's roof. After standing there for a while I go back to the classroom. Our teacher is talking about some war. He makes us draw maps and mark which areas belonged to each factions. Soon I leave the classroom. I'm now in a cave. I walk for some time and leave the cave. In front of me there is a vast, flat, grey plain under a black sky. An enemy is attacking from there. The army opposing the attacker is also present. There is a small village of gnomes ahead. The next thing I remember is a tattooed gnome girl kissing me passionately. We enter an extremely small house, but it's already occupied. I ask the resident if he lives there. When he says yes I ask him to show us a house where we could live. He shows us a small caravan.
The dream skips about 80 years. Everyone else has now left the village. We have a small son, but he is ill. The two armies are still battling. I go back to the cave mouth. Some warriors are battling. A girl I know detaches from the battlers and comes to me. Her hair is black (its really blond) and she looks overall like a war chief. We spoke, but I cannot remember what.

DELETED

I hate dreaming about spiders. They're the worst DX

So I was at my mom's house with her and my sister Amy. Every once in a while a big spider would scuttle across the floor and they were popping up more and more frequently. Then a big, lanky, hairless, sky-blue spider with a white hourglass-shaped mark on its back (like a black widow's mark) bit my sister. I had to drive her to the hospital and the car I was in had no roof. It didn't feel like a car; it felt more like a horse and buggy but without the horse.
As I was driving I kept running into all these obstacles and I kept hitting other cars and driving off. Once I was ran into the curb by another car so a bunch of race cars could go by! I was getting really frustrated. My sister's bite was cold to the touch, which was a good thing because it meant the venom wasn't spreading quickly. When we finally got to the hospital, the bite was growing warm, which was bad. I woke up before we went inside.

Man, I'm itching for another lucid dream! DX
I can only attempt to WILD twice a week and I've never succeeded yet. I need a method to try in the meantime...-_-

this dream occurred 2 nights in a row a few weeks ago...the first night it was clear enough for me to make out...the second it was more lucid...i would appreciate if anyone has insight on what it could mean...it includes my ex boyfriend who i love very much...we were suppose to get back together in dec 2010..the last things he said to me were i love you and yes i want you here with me...we havent talked since..he wont talk to me and tell me what is goin on....i moved away from him in oct 2010...i woke up shaking and in tears from this dream...


i was here at the house with my kids..just an average day...got a knock at the door..it was my ex boyfriend..i was surprised since we hadnt talked in a while..we talked and it turned into an argument...(unclear of conversation)...i asked him to leave and he did...i went about my business and a couple hours passed..got another knock...i was worried it was him again...to my surprise it was 2 state troopers...i invited them in...they said they got my address from some papers in his car..my ex boyfriend had been in a car accident and was the hospital in icu...i called his mom and let her know and she said the reason he had come up here to me was to come get me and take me back with him...i rushed to the hospital...my husband had to investigate the crash site...he told me there were several things in the car that were mine...letters and a snoopy plush toy (i had given it to my ex the day i left)...his mom finally arrived and wanted to get him back to phoenix...the drs' said not until he is stable...she couldnt stay long cos of work..no one else from his family could come up...i stayed by his side night and day...

Non-lucid - Lucid

I was in this small office building, and there were people working at desks but their faces were blurred. "Hey I'm dreaming!" I yelled. Already I could feel the dream starting to fade. "I want more clarity NOW!" I started walking around and rubbing my hands and suddenly I appeared in front of a sandwich shop. I was surrounded by a ton of people, they were all staring at me strangely. "I wish for everyone to turn into hot guys!" They did. But some of them were a little too old for me so said, "I wish for everyone to turn into YOUNG hot guys!" And they did. Perfect, I thought.
I walked into the sandwich shop and saw the same guy that was in my dream the other night. But of course I didn't realize that until after I woke up. I walked over to him. "Hey." I said in a flirty voice. He had short brown hair, and was wearing a black jacket with a white t-shirt underneath, and dark jeans.
I grabbed him and leaned in to kiss him, but he pulled away and mumbled something I couldn't understand. I pulled him down again and this time he didn't pull away. The kiss felt weird, I could feel my lips go numb, and I realized the dream was fading. I pulled away, and was about to ask him his name, when the dream ended.

12/02/11

So i'm back in work.
There is a kareoke theme going on. John o' calls me over and tells me i've gotta sing. And there is a shortlist of a few songs. All christmas songs (because in my waking life, every christmas at work, in the pdr, we have kareoke ).
Anyway, Morrissey was one of the songs (moz never to my mind did a xmas song, but in my dream he had) and i knew i'd already picked moz on a previuos occasion. So i went for another one. But i seem to skip over my song.
THEN Michael Keaton, wearing 'batman' like ears is suddenly there, doing Morrissey.??????
Right after that, an old mate od mine- Nixi, turns up and tells us of his problems he has with working for his dad and his personal relationship with him. So i comfort him.
Then i'm in the delivery area, dressed as the honeymonster from the sugarpuff adverts, but rocking like angus to some ac/dc (complete with schoolboy cap!- knobhead!) and a sweeping brush in my hands, like it's a guitar. Whilst this is going on Luke is cleaning out the hygene store so there is dustpan n brushes everywhere.
I stop arsing about and ponder upon a hypothetical scenario of Carolyn being in the office at the time, and see me messing around and bollocking me! And how stupid i was for not checking her absense. And then remember an occassion where Simon got bollocked for something. And him, holding his hands up and saying "i havent't got an excuse, i'm sorry" with a smile on his face (which happened in real life).
Then i think of a scenario of a camera catching me picking my nose (which, if your chef, is NOT a good thing really, is it!? ).

Then i have a false awakening. I get up to write in my dj (paper one). And i'm not entirely sure if i was at home or not. Lewis from work is there who keeps talking to me as i'm trying to write, which does my head right in! Paul is in the background (work) i politely tell him to do one. And i continue with dj. Ann-Marie is there, wanting me to play a miniture version of draughts, to which my attention turns, then i start playing against coffee shop Sue, both thinking we have the best tactics.

what a load of drivle. still, in none lucid dreams, you dream what you dream really, don't you?

Another lucid! Still having trouble making it last, but I am making progress.

I was walking through some house with my dad. We were getting ready to leave, so I was getting my purse and coat together. I noticed that a light in one of the bedrooms was on, so I went to go turn it off. I flipped the switch but the light stayed on. I did it a couple more times and then I realized that I must be dreaming. I managed to keep my cool a bit more this time and didn't freak out or anything. I kept talking to my dad as if nothing was up. I ran my hands over the wallpaper to feel it's texture. My dad told me that he had to use the bathroom before we left. I took this opportunity to try spinning. I was surprised at how easy it was and how fast I could spin.
When I opened my eyes again, I was on a sunny street somewhere. I knelt down and felt the roughness of the pavement. I got up and started to walk, but again the dream started to fade away!
Within a few minutes, I was awake, and when I fell back asleep I had lost my lucidity.

I think I am getting better though!

DJ Log: February 12, 2011 – Morning, 8:15AM (USA Eastern)
Text color legend: · NON-DREAM · NOTES · DREAM · LUCID ·

I am entering a large parking garage through a doorway from an airport. The warm humid air stinks of car exhaust and tire smoke. The sound of the buzzing ballasts in the putrid yellow high-pressure sodium light fixtures drown out my footsteps. The walls are dingy gray and there are many rusty pipes along the ceiling. I walk down the main aisle and approach the railing on the ramp where I can see the levels above and below the level I am walking on.

There is a guy walking on the lower level who is looking under and between cars as he walks toward the ramp. He has medium-length dark hair and is wearing a black leather jacket over a white t-shirt, black jeans, and black boots. He is carrying a large pistol, and has another pistol in a side holster. Before he spots me, I quickly move away from the railing and walk briskly up the ramp and toward the central stairway and elevator shaft.

As I approach the elevator, I see a guy who appears to have been shot in the leg. He is tying a t-shirt around his wounded leg and gives me a distressed look as I approach. He has long dirty-blond hair and blue eyes, and is wearing a long-sleeve gray striped shirt, torn blue jeans, and black shoes. There is some blood on the ground, and what looks to be the bullet he was shot with. There are several brown cloth shopping bags and a light gray case sitting on the ground. The case has a broken latch and is partially open, revealing that it is full of bright green pills. I ask him, “Are you OK?” As he is cleaning off his hands in a water fountain, he replies, “I am being hunted and it is not safe to stay here.” I say, “I think I saw your hunter on the way over here and he's walking up the ramp to this level right now.” I ask, “Are you OK to walk?” He replies, “My leg is OK, but I could use some help.” I ask, “Would you like me to help you carry anything?” He replies, “Sure, if you could grab the case, it is more important than any of these bags.” I pick up the case, holding it closed to keep any the pills from falling out. He picks up a couple of the bags and puts them into a trash can, then picks up the rest of the bags and walks with me to the stairs.

We walk down the stairs for a couple of floors, then decide to try the elevator. We walk around to the elevator and press the down button. The door opens immediately, and when we get in, the door closes quickly behind us. The control panel has only one button, so I push it. The elevator is making no noise and I cannot feel any movement at all. I can see my blurry reflection in the door, so I move closer and see that I have really large ears and a third eye in the middle of my forehead. I immediately become lucid and take a brief moment to stabilize by rubbing my hands together while looking up at the ceiling of the elevator. The ceiling is a typical medium fake wood-grain laminate with some brass panels in the corners. There are three white porcelain pull-chain sockets, two of which have a clear light bulb in them. The third socket has the broken remains of a bulb. There is a rusty metal fan grille with a logo plate that looks like it's in Russian, having an inverted 'N' and some other letters on it. I look down again and see that my reflection is gone and the control panel has hundreds of buttons on it now.

Realizing that I am dreaming now, I really want to strike up a half-intelligent conversation with the DC I just met. I look at the guy and ask, “What's your name?” He replies, “I'm Joe.” I put out my hand and say, “I'm Jim, glad I can help you out.” He gives me a firm handshake and says, “Thank you.” While giving Joe a good looking over, I say, “I love your hair, it's my favorite color.” He says, “Thanks, I like yours as well.” I ask, “Wouldn't it be awesome if we could trade hair for a day?” Joe looks at me for a moment, slightly puzzled, then asks, “Does it seem like this elevator is not going anywhere?” I reply, “I'm not sure. I haven't felt it move yet.” I look at the control panel and now there are no buttons at all. Becoming impatient with the elevator, I grab the door and force it open, only to discover that we are on the same level of the garage. I say, “Shit! Let's go back to the stairs. At least they seem to work properly in here.” We walk around the elevator and start heading down the stairs.

There is a female attendant standing behind a podium on the first landing of the stairs. She is collecting a cash payment for a ticket to access the last section of the stairway. A couple of rough-looking guards are checking ticket stubs as people pass through. Some people in front of us pay, receive a ticket and walk through. Both Joe and I pull out some cash and pay the attendant, but before we receive our tickets, I see the hunter walking toward the other side of the elevator shaft on the floor below. Joe's back is toward the hunter, and I am facing his direction. The hunter is looking the opposite direction as he approaches the elevator area.

I grab Joe and move in close to him to avoid being seen, saying softly, “Don't move and don't look to your left, the hunter is right there below us.” He looks at me with an absolutely terrified look. I say, “Just play along and blend in, or he will see us. Let's act like we're just some random tourists and kiss on the stairway.” The expression on his face changes from terrified, to a blank stare, then to a 'come and get me' grin. I drop the case on the ground, throw my arms around him, and start kissing him. He puts his arms around me and kisses me back very intently. His hands slowly massage their way up my back, then he grabs a handful of my hair and pulls me in slightly closer. I close my eyes and run my hands up his back, then grab his hair and pull him even deeper into the kiss. I could feel his heart pounding together with mine as our tongues got together and we kiss even more intensely. After a moment, I open my eyes and see that we are standing in an entirely white space with nothing and nobody around. I close my eyes again, and this was the dream's exit.

Unstable lucid
It was a sunny day outside and I was walking around a random neighborhood. It seemed as if the neighborhood was still in development, because there weren't too many houses around. I then saw a jet fly right over my head. I knew what was happening right away. It was going to crash.

I then realized that this situation was too ridiculous to be really happening and I became lucid. The jet flew right across my face, filling the entire left part of my view. The jet became a huge spaceship and as I looked passed it I was now in space. Everything went all psychedelic here and I can't remember all of the images that seemed to be flying past me. My view then went black and I prepared to wake up.

Upon waking I could already tell that it was a false awakening. I was floating around in a room that I've never seen before. There was a bed and it seemed to be a normal bedroom. I tried to set myself down so that I could become lucid, but I couldn't get a grip on any gravity and continued to float around. Everything then started to fade to black.

Dream Lucid Me DC

Dream 1
I was in some place which was kinda like my school. Me and my friend E were looking for some parts so we could open an door. Infact, everyone was looking for those parts. We came to the door and started to put the pieces in, but I got angry to my classmate and punched him to the face. Then I "woke up" (Travelled 2 seconds back in time.) and started to explain about how I just had a dream in a dream (I just can´t take the hint, even from myself.) and punched him again. And the same happened again. And again. And again. (Best dream EVER!) Then everyone went insane and started to run everywhere. Some guys chased me and E and we tried to find an exit. As we were close to it, I realized that I left my gloves to the start. We turned around and started to run back. Two other guys started to chase us, and I poked them with cards to keep them away. I wake up.

Dream 2
I´m in some room with my dad. He explains something, when I suddenly realize i´m dreaming. But as I start to think what to do, I wake up.

My dream recall isn't at it's best today, plus I wasn't asleep to long. I went to bed at around 4 a.m. and got up at 9:30. Laser tag really winded me.

Fragment one:
I'm with this kid. He seems to be my friend. He starts to ask me for money and I'm like "I don't have any money." He says "Well just steal some from your dad. I tell him that isn't a good idea, but soon after peer pressure gets the better of me and I take the money for him. Later on in the dream he asks me for money again, to which I respond, "My dad doesn't have any more cash."

"Does he have a credit card?"

"Yeah?"

"We'll just use that!"

We end up taking one of his (non-existent) devices. We insert the credit card in it and withdraw the money. Now I'm getting really nervous. He'll obviously see the withdrawal. I think I hear my dad at the and I tell him to hide the credit card and device.



Fragment 2(not sure if they're connected):

Some kids that I know are at my house (well…apartment) and it appears that they're looking in a book version of my dream journal. After a while of reading they start to kind of mock me (which I expect) but it doesn't really bother me. Then they really start to mock me, and after a while I promptly get up from my couch and tell them:

"GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!"

I repeat said phrase until they vacate the premises. (Yeah it was a bit mean, I just didn't see what was the point of inviting people to my house if they were just going to make fun of me the whole time, I barely even knew them either).

I think I had one more dream after this one but I can't remember it. But last night as I was trying to fall asleep I finally got into a dream where I was in this hall. I started to run down it and then I started to feel control of my outside body. It was weird, like I fell down but never got up. Well I haven't really been lucid in a while, next time I am though I have to remember about Operation: Ghost. Well I'm hungry and I'm gonna go have some breakfast.

Good morning, everybody.

Dream #1

I was in a small hallway that was dimly lit. I stood by a little group of shelves for newspapers. I saw and grabbed a copy of The Onion. But somebody acted in a mean way that made me nervous as I was grabbing the paper.

I got nervous, pulled the paper out quickly, and hurried away. But a few steps away, I realized I had gotten only a few of the first sheets of the paper, not the whole thing. So I went back to grab the rest of the paper.

I was now in a gas station. One of my friends was with me, I'm not sure who. Behind the counter of the gas station was a youngish woman, a little overweight, with copper-tan skin and long, black hair that was pulled back and a little frizzy. She was really cheerful and nice.

I was sitting in a big, pink recliner before the counter. I seemed to be sitting inside of it as though I were really small, maybe a child. But I also seem to have been myself, at my normal height, as well.

Apparently I was wearing diapers and I had wet my diapers. I hadn't told the woman, but she knew that I needed to change my diapers. She told me that there was a restroom in some place across the street (a cafe or a fast food restaurant?). She told me I could change my diapers there.

I didn't have diapers, and somehow the woman knew that, too. She pulled down, from a top shelf over the cash register area, a partly empty pack of diapers. There were two adult-sized, pink diapers inside. The woman told me I could change into one of these diapers and hold onto the other one.

Somehow I came to understand that the woman thought of me as either her kid or as a person who needed someone to take care of him like a mother would. She had known this for a little while, so she had prepared for it. I thought it was wonderfully nice of her to think of me.

I was now outside, on a wide street on a sunny day. The space on either side of the road seemed wide and empty, maybe with dirt lots or grassy lots, although there also were buildings somewhere in the distance. All around on the road there was a feeling of heavy machinery and dusty construction material.

A group of young people, some or all of whom may have been my friends, were laying out a line of what looked like gigantic surge-protector power strips. The power strips were maybe 1.5m long and .6m wide. At either end, they seemed to have poles sticking out of them, like the poles for rope-belt line makers.

The young people would lay the surge protectors down and then plug huge, black cords into them. A few people had to carry and set down each surge-protector. Both that work and the plugging work seemed difficult.

I was trying to find a place in the work where I could be helpful. But the people were all working so quickly and efficiently together already. I couldn't get in. Eventually I was worried that I would look lazy.

I may have made some kind of weak assertion to everybody else that I should have a place in the work. But one of the people (the only person I can remember now was a man with olive-colored skin, shaggy, black hair, and a shaggy goatee) said something about how I was too much of a sissy to help. One person may have told another person, "Tell that guy to go back to the diapers that girl gave him and have fun with those."

So I walked over to what seems, now, like a flatbed trailer for a semi truck. The bed seemed to have been made out of heavy planks of wood. Oddly enough, the pack of diapers the woman had given me was sitting on the bed. There was also some kind of pile of pages or some kind of book. The story in the pages/book may have been something similar to Alice in Wonderland.

I was now "almost-present" in some kind of place with an old friend of mine, M. M was trying to show me, in his usual intelligent-jester way, some article that he found really funny in The Onion.

I had a series of views based on that article. Sometimes it was like I was looking at the paper. Other times it was like the images on the paper, while still paper-images, were also my whole view, as big as the world. At other times, it was like I was in the images, like they were the three-dimensional, real world, while still looking like newspaper images.

The article was taking some fictional discovery made by fictional scientists, which was obviously a cave which had been used by prehistoric peoples for women to give birth in. But the article was trying to make it sound like a mystical place. The humor of the article, apparently, was how the scientists were trying to give this place a really mystical meaning, when it was "just" a birth cave.

At one point I saw a cross-section image of the birth cave. The cave had three rooms, one set behind the other.

The very back room was labelled with some "really mystical" title by the scientists. In actual fact, it was "just" some kind of room where a spirit was being prepared to enter into the body in the mother's womb. The middle room was the room where the actual birth took place. This room was again, given some "comically mystical" name. The front room had some weird label like "meat and other stuff." I took this to mean that all the supplies that one gets by living in the outside world started to be given to the newborn child here.

The article seems to have been full of references to an astral state. Apparently the scientists had discovered human ribs in the middle or front room. So the scientists made some weird comment about how the "astral ribs" of a cave dweller had been damaged and left behind.

The front room had been fashioned, apparently, into a spacious, domed room, with a wide doorway to the outside. The domed ceiling was the natural stone of the cave, though it also seemed to be fashioned into shapes that looked like tiles.

Near the front of the room, some of the "tiles" were missing from the ceiling. The scientists made some "comically mystical" statement about the shaped that the dark space now left by the missing tiles made in the ceiling. But the "comically mystical" statement "only" amounted to what the image actually looked like -- a woman lying on her back, giving birth, while another woman knelt before the first woman, receiving the child.

At this point I may have been trying to figure out what exactly was funny about this article. As far as I could tell, I thought, from my reading about prehistoric life, birth caves were very mystical places, and the birth process was very mystical. The fact that the image of birth in a birth cave had naturally occurred also seemed mystical to me. I couldn't see why a mystical treatment of the whole thing would be so funny.

Dream #2

I had apparently done some kind of complex work project for my boss. It was something I had done on my own initiative.

My boss now began criticizing my work. He told me that the work I had done was too complex. He said that this wasn't the kind of things clients liked to see from us. He said that our job was to do something more simplistic, very basic, and using very basic data.

My boss told me that we couldn't do anything that expressly directed our clients' ideas, because our clients' job was to have ideas. My boss said, "We need let the clients have a chance to do some value creation on their own. So if we just put a bunch of basic data together and something in it inspires our clients to have an idea, we've done a good job."

I took this to be my boss' nice way of breaking it to me that I was spending too much time doing the stuff I actually liked and not enough time doing the pain in the neck work of finding basic data, doing basic number work.

I knew my boss was too nice to tell me that I had been kind of on the wrong track for a while, and that I needed to get back on the right track of looking for hard number-data. So he'd made some cover-up story that really didn't even match what his real thoughts about our work was.

I now felt kind of stupid and lazy for not having done enough number work.

So, I find myself at my house. My Dad, brothers, and I are all watching TV. It's an average night. I'm not sure what we were watching though. I know I was getting very bored. Then, I become lucid without dream signs! Hell yeah! Well, it's time to leave this boring-ass place. I stand up, and walk outside the apartment. Oddly, no one says anything or tries to stop me...weird. So, now I remember I wanted to do the TOTY. I plan to do the Oz task. It'll be easy to find Dorothy if I fly. I take a running start. I use caution, for it's winter(it actually is for real). I jump into the air, ready to fly. Fail. Then, I plummet back down to the ground. I go face-first into a sheet of ice. Then, I slide down the whole sheet of ice on my face. Well that didn't feel so good. Literally, I felt it. Now, I'm paralyzed in pain. I can't get up. Shit! Now a plow truck is on course to run me over. Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit...YES! I get up finally, and I dive in a snow bank in the grass to the right of me. Right then, the truck passes by. Phew, that was too close for comfort. I stand up now. Let's try this again. I jump, fail. Fuck...well, I haven't been flying in awhile...hm. Now I think...believe, believe, believe! I jump, and I'm flying! Yay! I begin to fly away finally. After a minute or so of flying, I spot Dorothy in a local park. I see her red shoes. I land and walk over. What the hell?! My brothers are oddly here, and so is my Mom. Odd...anyway, I take Dorothy's shoes. She gets mad. I tap the heels three times. Then, nothing happens. Suddenly, we all get teleported to my school, which is rearranged as usual in dreams. I just wander the school until I awake.

NOTE: Cheers! Today I'm officially a one year member! I know it's not a big big deal, but still...this dream also marks the start of Volume 5 to my DJ. Please enjoy this pointless LD.

Color Key:

Non-lucid

Lucid

So I start off at my school. I walk outside and I come to an area with lots of water. Odd, we don't have that at the school. Anyway...the place is a backwards L-shaped dock made out of bricks. I see one of my classmates. She warns me not to get to close to the edge. That looks impossible...the dock can't be any wider than three feet. I take a few steps, then I slip.
"Oh crap!" I announce. I fall into the water. It's all green and disgusting. Probably because of all the algae, and lack of fish to clean it. As I'm drowning, I become lucid without my dream signs! Hell yeah! I blast invisible energy to the pond's bottom. I shoot up out of the water. Then, I finally land on the platform safe and sound. The girl approaches me, but then, I awake.

Hooray! Lucid dream number 3!

This dream journal business has really paid off, I never realised before how often I'm being chased down by "the man" in my dreams and it happened again last night. I immediately realised that this was a huge dream sign for me and RC'd. My fingers looked insane, almost like my hands were the wrong way round. So I looked up and took in the desert environment that I was in. My recall of this bit is a bit hazy but I think I might have flown a little bit. I remembered considering what to do and thinking of somebody on DV who wanted to fly in underground caverns. The dream started fading at this point so I looked at my hands again and rubbed them together, this brought the dream back into focus. After doing this a few times I realised that I could morph my hands into really weird shapes, I grew extra fingers and even took some away.

At this point I remember reconsidering what to do, I knew I'd planned something but couldn't remember what (I know now that this was play an american football game) and then a woman approached me. I was kind of reluctant to do anything with her as I knew this would be wasting dream time that I could use doing things that are impossible in real life. I got sucked in however but the dream quickly faded out after this as I wasn't really in the mood.