non-lucid

28th March 2021

Fragment:

Some kind of false awakening, dream reality feels accurate to waking life. I get up and then am answering the door? It's early morning and it's sunny outside; the sun's position in the sky would make it late afternoon but in the dream I don't realise this, the light looks morning-like. There's a courier stood by a van on the left or something and I go to him, shielding my eyes from the sun's glare with my right hand. My eyes feel exactly as if I had indeed just gotten up and are taking long to adjust to the bright light and I squint. I take a package from the courier? There are other people around in the street but rest of details not recalled.

Fragment:

I'm in a building. A hall or palace, unsure. I'm part of a faction and I have some kind of battle equipment but little detail recalled and I go on some kind of patrols on my own in a city or town area. Then back at the palace place, one item I recall clearly on a table is an Axis-like medal with a skull at its centre. It's a pendant and it's mine. I take it and it has some kind of interface overlay saying it grants me "+2 fortune". There's some other pendant which I also take and it grants +1.

In the room I'm in, there are two large palace windows to a courtyard. A Nazi officer with some bodyguards or soldiers approach a door next to the windows. He knocks or something and waits patiently, I believe someone answers the door and the officer speaks. "I have been sent to speak to the queen", he says, or something to that effect. The door is shut and the man waits patiently outside, looking somewhat stiff in posture.

It is either dawn or night but it doesn't look so dark outside. Someone goes to get the queen; eventually she appears to my left in a dark corridor. She's in her night clothing and looks rather exposed or vulnerable as far as royalty goes. This is some ancient English queen, but I'm not sure who; possibly queen Victoria, I get a feel of. She stands a distance away from the door and it is opened now; she engages in some dialogue with the Nazi officer. Her face suggests mistrust, disgust and apprehension, possibly more so for having been woken in the night like this.

Notes:
- The second fragment was very long but I cannot recall enough of it to put into words; a lot of it seemed to take place in WH40k-like locations. There was a general feel of futuristic Warhammer mixed with WWII themes to the whole thing.

- The pendant I had also gave that feeling; as far as I can tell, it was like a medal awarded to me for valour in combat; I do not remember what the second pendant looked like. They were both on leather strings.

27th March 2021

Scraps:

(recalled after I sat at my desk)

I am at my computer. I'm checking on Steam or some other similar program and in there I see that AH messages me saying that I "was right, it was a joke", which she then starts to explain in more detail. I feel a mix of anger and mistrust but also relief.

A possible false awakening where my alarm was going off and playing music; but something about the music didn't seem right each time. The environment looked accurate to waking life but foolishly I didn't think to do any types of checks, as I felt quite sleepy.

Notes:
- While in bed last night, had another dialogue with Data as I was falling asleep. This time I could use my own voice and not the captain's. But Data seemed unable to communicate very clearly this time. We talked about dream signs and my inability to either notice them or have them appear, lately, as well as how I have been doing some RCs too routinely sometimes.

- When I recalled the fragment about the conversation with AH, some of the dream feelings described were temporarily present. I proceeded to check that this conversation hadn't actually happened and really was just from a dream.

- Although the environment looked accurate while I was hearing the alarm, I also recall it seemed brighter than it should have done for that time of the morning. I've had dreams where the environment looked so accurate that it was easily acceptable for them to be waking life locations/situations.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

Some avant-garde show or ritual where some guy goes around defying the audience to dance inspired by what they are watching. Many on the audience seem to be professional dancers by the way they move. Then someone starts passing a lamb head as a prop. But the lamb head is alive and I feel horrified, but not like scared, but worried for the "animal". So I kidnap the lamb's head and run away with it. Take it to the vet and they say it needs surgery to survive. After we get some more info about the origin of the animal, the vets tell me I need to go to Africa and get something that will heal the animal. Once in Africa, in some remote village, I need to pass a door with two guards. I try seducing them, but they don't flinch. Then ask me for a million dollars to go in. I explain the situation and say it is to save an animal's life and they reduce to half a million, which is still ridiculous but I agree to and they let me in. I then steal whatever was inside the guarded house and return to the vet. The lamb is now able to get its surgery and regrow a body. Later I get a call from the vet saying the animal is doing great.

I married to some rich family, but I have this feeling I did it against my will and feel unhappy. I am walking with my family through some hipster area of old docks now turned into restaurants and bars. By the other side of the river I see Manhattan. I am walking ahead of them, making a little dance waving a white shawl in the air, feeling empty inside. Then I encounter Zilla by chance and she walks with me. She spots some vegan fast food and invites me to come along. I do and let go of whomever I was with before. Riverstone is there too and although it's mid morning, they both wanna eat lunch. At first I say they are crazy but then I give in to the idea and ask for an Impossible Burger. While we sit at a table, I get notified that I have an exam to renew my driving license renewal in a day or two and I panic because I wasn't aware and haven't studied shit.

I am dating Seth Rogen. I am half lucid, so at first I feel like "Why didn't I chose some hunkier guy to fool around with?". But he is extremely sweet and I actually start feeling the hots for him. We're sitting on a bed or couch, making out, and when I kiss him he gets really excited, in a very adorable innocent way that makes me want him more. He starts reaching out to his pants and I am totally into it. But then I notice that there is another bed to our side and two girls are sitting on it, watching us and that disturbs me. Worse, I spot a red demon under their bed and see that he is about to snatch one of the girls, so I jump to grab her and rescue her. The demon gets pissed and starts projecting long arms, claws and tentacles and weird heads coming from under the sheets, without ever leaving the bed area. I beat him as hard as I can until he kinda retreats and I sunk into the wall.

My mom is with her friend Paula. We are at an ice cream shop and I look for a vegan flavor. There is one for the stupid price of almost 25€. I complain a lot to the seller and he seems not to understand my complaint. Then I realize that's the price for a whole bucket of like 5 to 10 lt and I apologize and ask how much for a cone with a ball. I then follow my mom and Paula to a car. They didn't get ice cream so Paula is offering something else like crackers to my mom and ask if I want some to. Then we go get my dog Hachi and Paula goes get some other dog like animal on a leash to accompany us on a walk, but it is some dog-like alien with green body parts. I insist that she keeps a good distance from me and Hachi, because Hachi already reacts bad to other dogs, let alone alien dogs, but she keeps forgetting and getting to close for comfort. One time they almost get into a fight, so I give up on this walk and we take the dogs away. Later on I accompany them again to some kind of old garage where mom is talking to the owner and some guy offers us crackers and cheese. I am giving it a try when my Sensei enters the place. First he pretends not to see me while he talks to the rest of the people, clearly nervous about approaching me. I also pretend not to have seen him in the first seconds, but then gather courage and I say hi and give him a hug. He feels relieved and actually a bit overjoyed, so then he gropes my breast and pretends it is by accident, but I know it wasn't. I ask about the classes, he says it all stopped because of the pandemic, but that he misses it a lot. I say I do to. I wonder why he doesn't ask me why I left the classes way before the pandemic started.
Music starts playing, some Latino rhythms like salsa and he and everyone else start dancing. I don't want him to invite me to dance, so I leave through a back door into a backyard and I see my mom is already there with some new age "kumbaya" group. They seem harmless, so I let her be. Then they invite us to go on a boat trip and I start drifting from the dream. Probably had a very brief episode of FA and felt my bed shake like there was an earthquake, but that brought me back to the dream on the boat. I laugh and tell my mom that when the boat started the engines, it coincided with me feeling my bed in RL shaking and she laughs.

I am again semi-lucid, back on land at some ground floor mall at some private condominium, but the atmosphere is dark and heavy and I see no one around. I also feel watched by agents or demons whom I know to be present in the dream, ready to attack me. I walk through the corridors and sense a presence following me. I do evasive maneuvers until I find an exit and run around the building to try and see me stalker. It is some shady guy who disappears again. I see a lady walking away with the alien dog from Paula. I fly upwards to assess my surroundings and then land in some university campus, which I find lovely. Each faculty seems to have a theme, for instance, literature classes take place in a mini medieval village, where each house is a classroom and people gather around communal tables to debate topics, instead of facing a teacher. I walk a bit through the narrow streets, the houses are all ground level timber-framed and feel very cozy. At the end of one of the streets there is a bigger building, like and open hangar, but it is a tavern or bar, and the decoration changes completely. It is 60s and cinema inspired. It has the colors and the furniture typical from the 60s and posters of old spy movies on the walls. There is a door leading to the parking lot with a toll booth. A vintage car from the 50s just stopped at the booth and when I approach, a bunch of gangsters come out of it and point guns at me. Turns out I also have a gun and also drop it on them. For some reason they stand down and leave. My cat Yéti comes out of nowhere and I pick him up. Once on the normal city streets, I see my mom's apartment building or a very similar one, but with a few more balconies. I see the details like the tiles on the walls and feel extremely nostalgic about it, to see how detailed it is engraved in my memory. Then I fly upwards and take notice of the rest of the buildings around, think about getting beyond this and do something interesting. I fly higher and higher, until what I see below me is an African plain at sunset, as far as the eye can see. I feel free and relaxed, but my cat Yéti who I am still holding, is getting pretty nervous and wanting to jump, so I look for some place to drop him safely. There is a house floating in the air, no front wall for some reason, so I just go inside. I am planning on resting there for a while, see if Yéti can be left there safely, but the house starts tilting and everything in it slides through the open wall and falls into the void below us. Some old Asian lady comes in from another room, looking surprised to see me and in panic. I only have time to grab Yéti again and I jump into the void to fly away on my terms instead of falling.

I am in a room talking with BTS and I find them all very nice and smart people. I decide to become their fan and wonder if any of the guys in the band is single, so that I could hang out with. I sit between two of them and one, I think the youngest, immediately leans on my shoulder and gets really close. I was fantasizing about dating one of them, but all of a sudden I feel like he is pushing it a bit too much too soon, so I tell him nicely to back off amd take it easy. The others laugh.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

At some sunny city somewhere in southern Europe, I think, which has canals. There is some international event going on and I am actually walking away from it. Then I spot Trump in a very bad disguise on a motor boat, going in the direction of the crowded area. His kids Baron and some of the girls are going in other boats in different directions. I know immediately they are going to commit some terrorist attack and try to stop it, but can't.
In the end, I end up with the ashes of the victims, for some reason.

In France, at a natural history museum, I stalk a guided tour with high school kids, so I can listen to the guide. The guide notices me, but pretends not to care to avoid causing a fuss.
There is a display of ancient dentures with semi precious stones as teeth. The guide tries to make me feel self-conscious by asking me a question about it. I feel embarrassed and I separate from the group and head to the museum shop. I am delighted with a Star Wars encyclopedia and there are books that resemble some of my childhood Russian books and I get very excited, but turns out they are just similar and not the real deal. A couple kids that were in the guided tour before, also come to the shop and start flirting with me. I feel flattered, but they are just kids. I go get my coat from the cloakroom and the guy there is really gorgeous and age appropriate for me so I also flirt with him a bit. I can tell we both feel like we don't want to depart so soon, but I am the one taking the step. I touch his hand and say I loved meeting him, but I have to say goodbye and that I am going away from this country soon and will probably never see him again. He looks heartbroken.
At the exit we are thoroughly checked to see if we stole something from the museum, but instead they confiscate some pills I have on my pocket. I explain my need for it and make a bit of a scene, so they end up letting me go with it.
Outside is already night and I have no clue how to get "home". I just have a vague idea I need to go to a bus stop near of after some place named L'Envers. I go to the closest bus stop and wait for a bus to come. My french is a bit rusty, but when a bus comes, I beg the bus driver for help and he ignores me and starts moving away. I keep begging for some indications and some Asian dude steps up and offers to help me. So the bus driver stops and and I come on the bus. The dude says he can help me to get closer to my destination and teach me what buses I need to get on and off to get there, so I sit a couple seats away from him.

I'm in some kind of big training hall shop with dad. He pays 100 kr for some tickets and we move on. We are supposed to play some tennis. New fragment. We have gone biking instead. There is a big sand pile that has about a 45 degree slope. It is impossible for me to bike up because my wheels won't get a grip on the sand. Dad is able to do it easy.

I was in bed and tried to visualize rings that I fly through. They become really real with shadows and texture but I'm not able to go through them. Now I think I was already in a dream trying to enter a new dream. I had no intentions to WILD this night.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

With my dad. my uncle Fernando and my cousin Rui, visiting the house-museum of the famous saint-doctor from my hometown. Someone mentions that a guy claims this is his house and he demands to live here, so he actually moved in one day and started collecting the entrance money from visitors, but apparently he was arrested.
I notice something strange about the staircase, my uncle and cousin go up but they end up coming down and when me and dad try to go down, we end up going up, like Escher's stairways. We are trying to reach the second floor and after some struggle, we do. Once there, there is a DJ playing music and some party going on, probably illegal. Soon after, a couple policemen barge in and I think "I was right", but one of them starts stripping and goes full frontal, while the other actually seems to be arresting people. So it's confusing, but I stop trying to figure it out, as the naked guy is such a hunk with a big dick and I decide enjoying the view.

This was the first time in a long time where I let myself sleep until I could not sleep anymore. I walked out of bed 08.10. I have started to look at my fingers again as a RC.

I'm in Sturkö and walk with dad and his mom. We walk on the bridge but see that water has flown over because the bridge is broken. We have to jump with water to our knees in order to continue. As we reach the end of the bridge we start to talk about some kind of swimming competition I am going to. Dad asks me how deep we are supposed to swim and I say 1.5 meters, but then I say 3 meters instead. Dad is worried and says that it is pretty deep. I think about jumping into the water by the bridge but it seems cold.

I'm in a hotel with an enemy. We run up the stairs and try to come to our rooms. I find my room and try to unlock it but the key is bad and won't open it until a long time has passed. When I'm inside I grab a bag but notice that my enemy has sabotaged and ruined my setup. New fragment. We look at some kind of screen where it shows how many diamonds I have. Some people scroll through a list where it shows what kind of things I can buy with the diamonds. Most of the things you can buy are passive upgrades. I have about 40 diamonds and the most expensive upgrade costs 1600. I tell them that I am going to buy that one because it makes it easier to collect more diamonds. They say that I am insane and that I should pick the second most expensive that costs 6000 diamonds since it gives me such a good passive weapon upgrade.

21st March 2021

Dream:

At a dining table? Not sure if it's even in a room exactly, but there's a feel of the dining room at my old home. Mom and T are playing some strange eastern game or something involving objects they throw over to each other. The table is long like a festive dining table? Something about decorating it.

The trim of the table has been painstakingly put together from dozens or hundreds of strips of decorative paper or something. Another bit uses some kind of holographic projection. I wonder or ask why it simply wasn't all done with the projection method.

(recall gap)

Some bit in a town. Looks like my native country, streets very similar to that of towns near where I used to live. I'm coming up a hilly bit on foot. There's someone I'm supposed to meet and pick up but I have to tell him I won't be able to. I see him by some kind of public transport stop.

He's a black teen, with short hair. I ask him if he's waiting for one of us, from my family. He confirms that he is. I then explain that I won't be able to take him because I don't have a car right now. Dad or L is using it?

He doesn't seem to be disappointed and explains that he got a vehicle of his own and will be able to use that; it's some kind of trike?

I ask him to be careful, I think I'll feel responsible if he has an accident.




22nd March 2021

Dream:

I'm in a tank, at first in some kind of RTS-like view mode, but soon after moving around this scenario for a bit it changes to a regular (closer) third-person view.

I find some targets along the way and destroy them, as I'm headed somewhere. An enemy base of some kind? The enemy units seem frightened and try to keep as much distance as possible and avoid me. I fire the main cannon but also use the secondary gun to destroy enemy targets.

I remember feeling myself use a keyboard and maybe seeing it too (old yellowed keyboard?) to control cannon pitch and yaw. I also have a secondary type of ammo for the cannon, some miniature warheads, which I use a few times?

Eventually, after all the ground targets are down, I head towards a square-ish hole in the ground. I switch to a first person view now, in which I can see the cannon sticking out. I "crawl" down into the hole slowly, not wanting to fall down as there is a drop and a boss down below. Some kind of giant, an avatar of some deity I think.

I try firing one of the warheads into the room below since I don't actually have direct line of sight to the boss but it doesn't seem to affect it, as a health bar for the boss an a UI remains unchanged.

Hesitant, I eventually go down. I engage this avatar in combat using my main cannon and trying to keep my distance from its swiping. The avatar has a muscled and male form, it's colouration is dark, maybe a black tone like basalt.

He talks to me as he fights, but I cannot recall what about. I don't do much damage and the boss kills me eventually. I respawn in a chamber adjacent to the boss room. The whole place has an ancient classical look to it. Although this passes me by in the dream, it actually reminds me of Act2 levels from Daikatana.

The boss room itself had a very similar look. It is octagonal and with a few (sort of) central pillars. There's a shallow level of water and it looks clear. This water is also present in the other large room I was respawned in.

After a tiny bit of exploring? I try to get the boss to come out of his room since there's actually more room to fight him in this one. It doesn't work though, he's apparently "leashed" and eventually I just go back in the main boss room again.

I can't recall the rest but the dream went on for quite a while.


Notes:
- I don't know why but I feel compelled to register a sudden observation. Lately in dreams I feel there has been some absence of emotion.

- The deity's avatar was probably based off some recent boss fights in some games.

- Although it's unusual that I had some awareness of the keyboard in a way that made me step out of "tunnel vision", for the most part in that dream I was just immersed into its reality in the same way that I am when playing a game in waking reality.

17th March 2021

(didn't capture recall before it faded)

Fragment:

I am driving; I'm in the middle of a fast changing situation?

I made a game of some kind and I'm playing through it. Maybe it's like Doom in gameplay but some part of it makes me think of AvP.



18th March 2021

Fragment:

Black cat, rubbing it under where the rib cage started as it seemed to be where it enjoyed it most. Unusually, this unnerved me a bit for some reason. H is sitting next to me and giving the cat attention too. The cat resembled Y. (in-lne note, it's possible it unnerved me because a dream character is effectively a part of me, and I don't particularly like being touched under or on the sternum but I wouldn't have much of a problem with doing this with a pet if it's what it wanted)

Fragment:

At my old home's town. Driving down through the avenue that is by the church. I'm a passenger. The driving and such are all on the correct side.

I see the cafe that's to my left, the one that has the office supplies shop. It's front end is being expanded, like they're adding on to the in-door esplanade space. In the dream I assume this has something to do with Covid and social distancing.

This week, my cousin who was visiting and detoxing from fentanyl Died while everyone in the house was asleep, she had a seizure by herself and choked to death... In spite of that I had some recall.

Jamie 1

A dream where we were in the car she used to drive in 2011, it was a really old style car, but it really suited her. Don't remember much else from the dream.

Jamie 2

Bit of an intimate dream i had while dozing off during watching something on Youtube... I guess she was trying to make up for the weeks that weren't good?

Work

Dream about work but you had to climb a large metal chute just to get into the building. I realized i left my jacket there so I crawled uo the chute and knocked a few times. A co worker I know answered and got my Jacket when I asked for it.

???

Dream abotut seeing an old friend from chilliwack. He seemed really standoffish. I wanted to ask him why he suddenly hated me so. He said he didn't hate me and gave some weird reason. We were all in a very large house in this dream.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP


Part of a team planning something that implies invading someone's underwater bunker and living there for a year. But the plan fails, because the bunker is at a lake or near the shore and there is as a guy driving buy who spots us diving and he knows to whom this place belongs and what's down there under water. I think we should abort but the others decide to go anyway.
Nothing happens for weeks. We get used to living there. It's more like an underwater complex, spacious and with multiple areas, even has a living room with a piano, very stylish.
At some point we're running a full business from there and I interview 3 ladies for the secretary job. Someone even brings in a dog,
Then there is one incident, when the two guys who take shifts guarding outside, get into a fight. While they are not watching, some hired killer comes in the complex to eliminate us. And somehow I know this but no one listens to me. There are escape pods and I consider going on one, but I decide to stay and locate and neutralize the enemy.

I am at the Finances office, to clear up a doubt about my taxes, but the world looks a bit post-apocalyptic and the place looks chaotic. No one comes to help me, so I just barge in and look for employees in the lower level office rooms. I find a room with two workers behind desks covered in piles of paper and attending a 3rd person, so I wait on a bench in the corridor for a chance to talk to them. While there, the corridor behind me fills with debris, like the walls just collapsed. But the workers just keep doing their business as usual, as if nothing happened and eventually ask me what they can do to help me. We discuss income tax and they issue an invoice for the tax I have to pay, and then I leave.
I meet my dad on my way out, and I tell him about my tax issues. But then he starts tickling me and playing with me like he used to when I was a child. But not in a good way. (And this is actually real, my father never abused me, but he did harass me a lot and disguised it as innocent play) Things escalate as he starts pulling my pants off. I get really mad at him and yell at him that that wasn't ok when I was a child and it is not ok now, and that he will face consequences, because I am an adult now. I call him an abuser and tell him that what he did, was never play, it was always sexual abuse/harassment and he seriously needs treatment for his mental problem. He goes speechless. He looks down on the ground, then grabs a sandwich, but can't even swallow it because his throat is so dry. Then he changes subject and asks me about some movie he saw or wants to see, that is directed by some director he knows and Robert Rodriguez and he wants to know if I know him. But I am jut too furious and do not get distracted by the change of subject.

I had the most intense dream last night. I was watching a video of the day of my birth on a TV screen. My mom (died December 2019) was in the hospital bed, cradling "baby me". I started getting emotional. Next thing I know, I am IN the scene, physically standing next to the bed. Mom and the baby are gone. Suddenly, mom is standing next to me. I basically launch myself into her arms, holding her tightly. All I can utter between sobs is "mama, mama". I had a very strong feeling that this was really her somehow, not just a dream character. But knowing the dream was multi-leveled, I know that can't be true.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

At a house which appears to be Carla's home. There's my mom and my grandpa along with a bunch other people, as if they all live together there. There is an earthquake and I suggest we get out while it is happening, but my mom points out that grandpa can't get up and walk on his own. So while we're doing our best to lift him, the earthquake stops. People feel like it is ok to stay, but I go check the house and some rooms look dangerously affected, with awful cracks on walls and ceiling. I insist on evacuating everybody and I manage to grab my grandpa on my own over my shoulder and take him away, but then mom and a friend remind me about all the cats that live there and especially like to gather on the rooms that are most damaged. I tell them I will get them all to safety, and I start grabbing them two at a time and putting them in improvised boxes and containers to a safer area of the building, and closing these rooms shut. But there seem to be more and more cats popping up. At some point the corner room that was more damaged, is really coĺapsing and the cats are just there hanging out like totally oblivious of the danger upon them.

At some modern house with glass walls and straight lines over a grassy hill. There is a bunch of kids that come over for activities and I am somewhat responsible for them. We are playing with a radio broadcaster or similar and I am thirsty so I go drink a glass of water. It tastes horribly and I notice it is orange like it has rust in it. I go check our water source, some kind of well, and it is poisoned by two kinds of dead processionary caterpillars, one of them which is orange and black and I've never seen before. Doesn't seem very safe. Meanwhile I spot a bunch of them on the ground and before the kids or dogs touch them, I rush to pick them all and put them on a bucket. But on doing so, I grab some soil that is infested with different bugs and worms and there are some thin long ones that I think are baby earthworms, until one gets between my fingers and finds a way through my skin. It is so thin and slimy I can't get a hold of it and it enters inside my hand. I can feel it moving and it is exasperating and painful. I go to the doctor immediately and she gives me really grim news saying I just drunk water with a deadly toxin and have inside me the worst parasite that grows the larger of all. She says I have also been bitten twice by a black widow and I'm like "when was that, because I didn't complain about any of that?". She starts me on treatment but says the prospects aren't the best. I cry like a baby and say I'll never again even step outside the safety of a city.

Me and Riverstone run a little shop with everything from new and used clothes to a books and antiques and we also have a few boxes with stuff for free that people can just take. Some lady is interested in used baby clothes as she can't afford brand new clothes and I am having difficulty in finding it in the middle of the mess the shop is in at the moment. She asks if some stuff she likes can be taken for free and Riverstone says yes, because he is overwhelmed by the excess stock we have, but I think it is very sellable stuff so I say no to her. Meanwhile the lady is waiting regarding the baby clothing and I tell her to come back the next day and I'll have the stuff she wants. That's when I notice she is a little person.
Then I see some other customer sitting on a stone slab outside where some slug like creatures are sneaking behind him and because of my previous dream with worms, I panic and warn him about it. Still, one of them hooks itself on his back, like a leech. Fortunately we manage to unhook it. Then some stupid ass idiot comes by with a bunch of these worms in a jar, throws them at me and runs away. Everybody freaks out and helps me shake them out of my hair and check if any has latched on my body, but we think I am in the clear. I then get possessed and chase that mf down. Turns out it was a girl, she teases me like "so what? what will you do?" and I go full "Kali Ma" on her (Indiana Jones ref) and plunge my hands in her chest ripping her organs out and then to finalize it, I intend to project flames from my mouth, like a dragon, but instead I project hot green vomit on her, like the possessed girl in the Exorcist.
When things calm down a bit, I sit with Zilla, Vera and a couple other friends at some outdoor café to drink something and relax. There are familiar faces around from my school past. I hear some music that makes me smile. And Vera interprets that I am smiling because I saw a guy on the next table, she assumes I have a crush on. So she takes a photo of him with her cellphone and goes around telling everyone he is my crush. He actually is a guy who bullied me a lot in middle school, his nickname was "ass-bomb" because he once farted in the classroom or something. I am fully aware now and tired of silly games so I explain to her what I was smiling at and whom the guy is and decide to go for a walk and do something with my lucidity. The area is like a kasbah, very tight streets with earth-rammed houses and vendors' tents. I soak in the diversity while thinking what to do. I see a few more familiar faces from middle school, another couple bullies for whom I actually feel tenderness, not so much from what they did but just to see them as they were back then, kids who haven't aged. I find it precious that I still keep their faces stored in my memory. Then something odd happens.
Superman falls from the sky onto some iron structure like the entrance to a train station or something. He seems to struggle to get on his feet, then he is attacked by what seems another superman who looks more like a super butch superwoman, way more muscular than the original, but with a female face. And she beats the shit out of him. Then comes an emo superman, very pale and skinny and scared. He doesn't really do anything, just watches, confused, I am also confused. I decide to fly up where they are, to watch it better and maybe help the real superman, I don't know. But they kinda stop fighting and look at me surprised, like "and who the hell are you?". I feel like they now might pick a fight with me, so I just let go and fly away and let them sort it out.
I keep flying but now I am actually on a plane over Florida. Instead of landing in the airport, it lands on water but not as an accident, apparently it is an hydroplane. The sky is so bright blue, no clouds, sun is shining bright, wonderful weather and beautiful light. When we land on the water, people are then taken to some water taxis and escorted by jet skis who are there as a backup (they have rafts for taking in people if necessary). I find it a bit too much of a precaution, but I am impressed with the organization. Some kid is looking at me and I smile at him. Most people are families with kids and I feel they are going to Disney World.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

In the countryside, there is a lake and I am staying there with some friends. One of them is apparently developing feelings for me and because I am not interested, I decide to keep my distance from him. Literally, when he is on one side of the lake, I am at the opposite, and every time he tries to reach me, I move away. Our other friend comes to tell me he thinks our friend is depressed and he believes it is because of the recent racism escalation so he wants to throw him some lunch party or something and I find it a bad idea because his problem with him is uncorresponded love, but I tell him to go ahead, just don't count on me.

Then I am in the mountains. At a wooden cabin. I hear gunshots, probably hunters, which I detest. I go check on my dogs who are outside within a fence, but hunters sometimes don't care, they shoot anything that moves, so I fear for their safety. I see a couple Buddhist nuns passing by, and ask them if they've seen hunters around. They say they heard the shots and are saying prayers towards the animals at risk. Then some larger group passes right in front of my gate. The main figure is a Buddhist Lama and he comes surrounded by many monks, one of them by his side carrying a golden metal piece I can't identify. When passing in front of my lawn, the Lama grabs the piece quickly and drops it heavily at our entrance and apparently that means something important. They all come onto the lawn and sit around the Lama who is facing the golden object doing prayers. Then he makes some unintelligible prediction about a baby. Riverstone, whom I haven't noticed before was there, claims to hear something like a baby crying behind a wooden wall on our backs. It's supposed to be a hollow space for storage under a staircase or something, which has a door on the back that I know is locked with several locks. He is kinda out of his mind so he rips a board from the wall, not even letting me say there is a door. Inside this space is an altar covered in brocades and inside some covers is a baby girl that he picks up in awe and shock and brings to the Lama. Everybody is thinking of miracles but I know there is a door at the back of this pillar and ask Fernando S., who is also there, to check if the door is unlocked. He quietly confirms that it is unlocked. I get a bit pissed about the whole show, I don't understand the need for faking this whole shenanigan and I go outside the fence to the beginning of the hill descent. It's dark but I can see there are many other cabins and lots of activity going on, fires and prayers. It totally looks one of those Tibetan Buddhist settlements in the mountains, around monasteries and I think of my guru.

Literally I am telling the previous dream to Riverstone. I get to the part of the monks sitting at the garden. And he is so excited to hear it, just as he was in the original dream to live it. He is grasping for a meaning and I can tell he will be disappointed in the end. Anyway, I didn't reach the end of the story.


I am sleeping at some kind of attic at some family gathering. My dad, my deceased uncle Fermando and his wife are in that same house but they wanna leave, so my dad comes to wake me up to join him in offer them a gift before they go. I was pretending to be sleeping, cause I didn't want to be involved, but I notice them coming to check on me, so before they see me, I sneak out of bed and hide between an opened closet and remember I had more interesting things to do.
I get lucid and teleport myself to outside. Remember to do the TOTM but cant do the ceiling fan thing because I am outside now, so I go for the surf thing. I visualize the ocean just over the end of a hill nearby and I start hearing the water. I go there and half way walking on grass, the ground beneath me disappears and I fall from the sky into the ocean. Amidst the waves, I try to visualize a surf board but it does not work. I kinda feel it but I do not see it, so I catch a wave in an invisible board. Then i see some kids surfing. One of them fall from his board and I "borrow" it. They are pissed about it, but I tell them it's just to catch one wave and I'll give it back. But the waves are really flat. I catch two, but have difficulty in taking any pleasure in the experience. Feels more like sliding over flat water, than actually surfing, as the waves are so small. The last wave pushes me into what seems a small cave but then it is a room.
The dream shifts and now I am with kids in a room and they are waiting for the educator to come back. They say she'll put me in detention for making a mess. Indeed I am all wet and spread mud and water all over the pillows I am supposed to be sitting on. But when she comes in and before she manages to say anything, I sneak out and think I wanna surf more, but I am in the countryside again. I visualize an ocean bay and I head there. I am on top of a cliff where people watch beach goers down below. I then see Fernanda in a modelling gig shooting pics at the other side of this cliff, where there is some kind of canyon or canal and other people leaning over a rail, watching it. I ignore, because my goal is to surf again, so I turn again to the bay but it is gone and now in its place is a walk-in water fountain in a park with kids playing. Damn. I walk a few more steps towards the end of this park and someone calls my name excited. It's a friend of a friend (who actually does not exist in RL). I come back to say hi and she is very unpleasant, asking what I am doing here as I should be with my family or something. Then she has another friend with her, whom I never met, and she insults me too, saying maybe I am fooling around with some guy as I did with that guy in Italy while my boyfriend was at home. I did not do anything like that in RL, but in the dream I felt like I did, so I ask why this bitch knows about this and how many more friends of friends know. But then I say it doesn't matter because I don't know them anyway and I couldn't care less. I turn around to leave and they also leave still laughing and insulting me. I just go back two steps to tell the lady that I actually thought she was a nice person except for the part where she is a fucking cunt. They went down some stairs and when I look around I am inside some house again, seems like a clinic. There are rooms with patients and rooms with professionals apparently receiving training. I feel I am intruding but the patients gathering at some leisure room are very welcoming. Then I realize they all have back problems and are there for some physical therapy. I see something in the walls that catches my attention: intricate living landscapes. Each frame has divisions with small landscapes like lakes, ponds, ocean. You can see tiny rocks in it, mosses, algae, all real but in tiny size and most incredibly they are all covered in water that stays vertically in the divisions without anything holding it. Also, we are encouraged to touch it and make waves, make the water muddy, etc. Then I recall again my objective and I am considering choosing an ocean landscape to jump into it, but I wake up.

I thought about doing a clay figure when I went to bed but did not become lucid.

I'm playing the guitar and working on the project with Hanna. I am very happy because she has added a section where I can solo. I test it out and love the sound of it.

Notes: I have wished that this would be the case but I am happy to be able to back her song up. I didn't look on my fingers when I played and did not think about what scale it was but the music was spot on!