non-lucid

I'll start with the strongest dream fragment. It was a combination of anxiety related to being late for my first class/not having finished the homework on time or not having the appropriate prerequisites. I was moving around Mexico City trying to pay close attention to the time. Kevin was accompanying the family. There was a small section where people in the street were putting on a show for us at least partially trying to impress Kevin. The people were doing strange things like run into a wall repeatedly. Kevin thought the whole thing was too predictable. I asked him to think of the way it made him feel as part of a different art than he's used to. Out of no where, Vanessa showed up with her hair tied back. I hugged her onto the ground paying attention to minor physical tension between us. My mom finally recognized her. I asked if she was putting down roots in Mexico specifically Mexico City. She said that she was indeed, but the phrasing she used convinced my mom that she was pregnant. My mom alluded to this by asking if they needed to contact her parents about the good news.

Strange fragment trying to extract oil from some plants with ben. The idea was to put drops of stevia on our penises and stir the contents haha. Ben noted that the alcohol i had was not actually suitable for our attempt. I was ready to go for sure and sort of waiting on ben. I paid attention to how easily I overcame the shame of having my penis out and about haha.

My dreams were very vivid, but I went to bed at 5 and got up at 9, so there's not much to tell... however, there was one dream that was VERY interesting and, when I woke up, I was frustrated because I wanted to know how it'd end! It was like a film, I wasn't anybody in particular, although sometimes I was more than one person. And here we go:

A girl was at what looked like a college campus. She was sitting at a table and having a drink or something, but then her phone buzzed and there was someone watching her. Not in a creepy way, though. The person just posted somewhere that they had seen her and that she was really beautiful. She was flattered, so she decided to find the person. They had also posted a picture of her, and so many people (it was all very public) started sending her pictures of random people that could be the person she was looking for. It was messy, to be honest, but it all made sense in the dream.

Then, her best friend joined her. She said she was definitely going to help, and they even get another friend of theirs to help out a little. He was not with them, but they were all constantly messaging each other. In the meantime, her friend was going through some relationship drama, cause the guy she was seeing turned out to be a douche or something.

Anyway, then they took the subway, then they went back to the campus, then they were at a warehouse... until the girl found out that her two friends decided that they were in love (the girl who was with her and the guy they were messaging). So they got together during this quest, even though they hadn't seen each other in person. Anyway, that was when they also found out they were from the future. And the past. They actually are the girl's parents, but they don't remember anything because they're from the past, which is why they're her age. So the girl got happy that her parents had gotten together and that they were going to help her find the person who had sent her that message, because they were all sure that person was her soulmate.

The dream ended with the sudden realisation that the person could've been a girl.

I also had another vivid dream, but I can't remember what it was now. I know that I was me and that my mother was there and that, at one point, I was in a bathroom, but that's it.

Okay, I may have had my REAL first lucid.

This was part of a larger dream, but I forget most of the details. The important section was this:

I was with two other people. I think a teenage girl and an older guy (who kinda looked like George Carlin, IIRC). We were going to do some sort of thing to help me get a lucid (how convinient). After I "went to sleep" (it really seemed more like a scene jump), I "started" dreaming and the two of them were standing in front of me. Not-George Carlin starts trying to walk me through everything, but I get a feeling of suspiscion and look around the room, ignoring him. I interrupted him and said, "I think this is a dream." I pinch my nose and breathed successfully a few times. I looked at my hand and it was screwy. The two people looked at each other and Not-George said to me, "Well done." They disappeared and I looked around some more, but the far ends and hallways were being engulfed by darkness, so I started spinning, but to no avail. I think it ended so quickly because I expected it to, which I'll avoid later.

I think this was a true lucid because my actions and feelings felt like I was consciously doing them, though the events before and after still give me doubt.

Today i dreamt my brother parked the car near the street
with a large uphill. he needed to go there into a apartment.
it was night and he had to pass to the other side of the street, but there
were so many cars, he looked right then left, then he crossed the road.
but he didn't notice his dog. the dog crossed the street, to go to my brother.
i yelled "KODA! CAME HERE THATS DANGEROUS!" i kept calling it
but he was not listening, he came to my side of the street again, then when
he wanted to go to my brother again, a car came and hitted it, he was projected like
10 meters away. I was in shock, and i went to call my brother and tell him that
the dog was run over, we ran and brought him to the car. he was just damaged on his paw.
it was bloody, i don't know why but my brother brought us to intermarche, suppliment store.
i was crying and shocked, and was telling him "What are we doing here? lets bring koda to hospital!"


Dream elements:

-koda
-brother



Technique used: ----------


hours slept: 7 hours

This whole situation with D. is wrecking me up. Hardly sleep at all anymore.
Around 6 am tried a WBTB with following meditation. Couldn't relax then the guy next door gets a delivery (on Sunday morning!!). Had a short dream about my cat dying. He died ten years ago. But last night he died again in my dreams. Maybe I should take a break from everything. It's just too much right now

1.

Fragments:
Something about Mythbusters with Adam

Date: 08 Jan

Pre bed: 3mel

Wbtb: 1/3 latte, around 34 mg caffeine

I'm quite sleepy and resist waking myself too much, but still try to stay as awake as possible while in bed, repeating mantras and goals. I fall asleep with some long deep REM rebound.

DILD: It's a very long dream where me and parents get ready for a trip. Then I meet a DC that feels like a kindred sprit, I am eager to discuss with him possible solutions to a problem we both have.

A few moments later, I realize that this is a dream and remember my goals, freeze water and go fishing. The guy disappears somewhere. I am walking in what looks like a park and as I think about the task, I see that there are large puddles of water all around. Initially, I try to use them for the task even though they are too shallow and begin freezing them by willing it as well as by placing my hands down over one of them, where while they freeze, they emanate coldness and there's a cool mist effect lifting from the puddles! But then I realize this isn't going to work for the task and walk a bit further where there's a much larger and deeper body of water, like a pond.

I will the water to turn to ice, but to my surprise nothing happens. This annoys me. I contemplate whether to just get on the water as if it is frozen, but am uncertain if it will work, if I continue to expect to sink if I step on it. In the meantime, the water finally freezes. When I look at the surface, I see that part of it begins to melt already and dig with my hands in the softened ice to make a hole. This happens quite easily with no discomfort from the cold. There's some coldness, but it's ok, since I didn't think about it too much. I put my hands through the hole, reaching as far as I can and expecting to run across a catch.

I wait for a while but there's nothing around them and it gets kind of creepy what might be lurking in the darkness below the ice. In the area that's partially covered with ice, I can now see a number of small fish swimming around and succeed in catching one. It is a small tropical butterfly type fish but silver and red. As I hold it, my bf appears next to me and I tell him to take a picture, which I so much wish I could bring to rl, but before he can take the pic, the fish escapes.

I become so happy that have completed the task, I lose lucidity and begin to tell the dream to myself. After a while, I realize the dream is still going. Now I'm on the street in some neighborhood, there is an unconscious movement from my part and I end up floating in mid air, slightly above the ground, very stable though. I correctly recall this feeling from many dreams I had and exclaim to myself that taking off isn't as difficult as I have thought (previously irl). This is a good opportunity to practice a bit of flying and I do some flight manipulation, where I try to think of the direction and my body flies well in that direction. Then I try to take a turn and go in the opposite direction, but it doesn't quite work.

More rather random movements mid air and then I fly high up near a tall residence building, where I climb the last three stories using my hands. I somehow take a step back (see the building from a distance, although I am at the level of the third to last story). A black dotted panther on the balcony catches my attention. It looks kind of small, but actually it is the right size compared to the balcony and the stuff around it. The whole building seems small as if I am looking at it from a distance, yet I am very close to it. I briefly pay attention to that, but then wonder no more. There is a dalmatian in the apartment with the panther and I just so love exploring people's places, like in many non-lds. On the balcony below is a centipede, a very long one, apparently the same size as the panther (fits the balcony lenght). It doesn't look very appealing and I see two more on different balconies, I become vaguely aware that I am causing the one-many effect.

At some point I discarded the idea of going for Toty, because I thought the dream might end, but since it's still going, I decide to give it a try. Somehow, I go down to the ground and begin exploring a dream version of a familiar street. The bus station is here, only residential buildings, some larger buildings appear, but nothing that looks like a palace. I head towards the larger buildings that seem suitable and try to think that one of them is a palace. It starts to change, more and more detail is added and it becomes a flashy top notch casino. I still believe I could change it to a palace by trying to add a few columns at the entrance, but just increase the level of detail/casino quality.

I move on to the next building's entrance, which I recognize as some sort of amusement area. There's a distant dream memory also at work. Since I don't feel I'll get anywhere further with the palace, I eagerly get in, looking forward to having some fun. At this point I remember a dream where I took a super cool ride at a place that looked like this and become very excited. The lobby of the place where they sell the tickets is visitor empty, there's just the guy that sells the tickets, a girl that will ride with me and a male DC. The tall male DC next to my right is accompanying me to the cashier and I get a number of false memories and begin to have romance thoughts about him.

The DC at the desk gives me weird instructions of how to properly hold to the cart and my behavior while next to the girl that's also taking the ride. She is new, so I have to be careful. Bla bla, my lucidity level is dropping. I go to the girl and we wait to be let in to the ride but the dream finally fades and I wake up.

Dream fragment: I'm laying in my bed, I'm messing with my teeth with my tongue. I feel one of my back teeth wiggle and it makes a click noise. I panic and run to the bathroom and look in the mirror. I put my hand in my mouth and tug at the tooth very gently, but it falls out, I take it out and look at it, it's completely translucent, but i see tan things in there. I panic and think that my retainers won't work anymore and my teeth will begin to migrate, but then when i tongue the spot it fell out from I feel a brand new tooth like a polished little mountain poking out and I feel relieved and that this is even better because the other one was see through and this one is bright white.

Friday: A mountain "full of fog, 'wolves' and 'sheep'", where a woman who'll wind up becoming a historical figure is setting out to show the other side that some of their 'wolves' have deserted and are now helping her guard the 'sheep.'

Today: A guy in space, traveling toward Earth along with many, many other ships in some kind of race, the ship he's in seems made up of many different old parts, pieces are falling off along the way but he seems to have expected that. He's full of rage. There was something to do with lots being drawn, and his younger sister had been one of the winners, which would have meant she was safe and wouldn't have to take her chances in the race with the rest of them, but her parents (from whom he's estranged) had convinced her to give up her slot, that she must live or die and "become ashes" with them, so that they wouldn't be separated in the next life and lose her forever. She told him about this as he was looking over her ship for her, and he found something wrong with it, something that had been sabotaged, that would prevent him from communicating with her after the journey even if they both survived. He fixes it, and is furious.

Still the same storyline - there's a woman somewhere "left behind", the place all the people in the race and the lottery were abandoning. She wakes up with a gun next to her - not hers - and sees someone who says something to her. She, outraged by what he said, says "I don't look like a nice person to you?", and shoots him. Her logic being that if he couldn't recognize a good person when he saw one, he must be a bad person. As she shoots him, her face changes in some subtle way, something to do with her teeth, and I'm aware that in this place, now, people physically change to reflect their actions, and this is part of what the others were escaping from.

A conversation between a man and a woman in a bedroom as she's tying sheets together into a ladder, preparing to escape:
He: "I thought you might have missed it."
She: "Missed what?"
He: "The window."
She: "I can't miss the window. You're my destiny - war."

After an incident with a robot - it appeared human and was programmed to act as a caregiver to a group of four kids, something had gone wrong with it and put the kids in danger. Now someone's complaining to someone else about it - one's in law enforcement, the other's in politics, not sure which one is which. The one listening to the complaint responds, "I believe I oversaw the (something). And (something) to call in some backup." But when she says 'backup', she's not talking about something official. I see an image of two guys, not in any kind of uniform, one's scrawny and one's a little overweight, they have some connection to photography, possibly the press - they're the 'backup' she was referring to.

1. I was walking home trough some grass field. I was not alone. And i saw some mole holes on the way. And on one there was a triangle paper box and it said.. baby computer. It costs 500eur take it if you need it. And i was thinking well i could give it to my cousins daughter, she is 2y old. I tried its functionality and it was all about sounds. i pressed a button and a sound played. i listened to only 2 tracks. One was very dark. And i walked further and i saw some stands from the same company, and here they were offering dipers and baby food..

2. fragment! i recieved an email from ebay. They said that it is possible to repair my guitareffect for 30eur. And later my father´s co-worker asked me if i can develop some software for his firm. It was all about data entry into a base and to sort it alphabeticaly.

Read about the SSILD technique and tried it. Not sure if this will be a good one for me. Woke up without any alarm. Tried the relaxation cycle. Fell back asleep. Nothing. Tried again and again as I kept waking up during the night. Nothing to report here.
In the early morning hours I dreamt I was back in FL. I met all my friends again. It felt wonderful. We were at Winghouse. Suddenly we were all living in a medieval house (more like a castle). My friends all dressed up as if they would go to a re-enactment. They looked great. It was funny. They all were part of a procession and tell me to go with them. I just stand there and watch them. Suddenly I'm back at the house and the maidservant is telling me in an evil voice "Maybe they will never return from the procession!". I think something might be really wrong and something bad will happen to my friends. So I run through the house, open all these old fashioned locks and when I finally reach the last door I wake up.

Journal Entry non-lucid #4 Dream, non-dream (Comments)
Background: I went to sleep hungry for the first dream.
Dream fragment 1 from 8pm-11pm" Disturbing mediators ": I was entering a car race. The authorities at the race were doing background check to make sure that terrorists don't get in. Once we were allowed to come in, they gave us tanks. We had a sargent, and he told us that our mission was to defend a basket of cookies & milk. I didn't complain because I was hungry and I wanted those cookies and milk. All these people appeared and they had cookies and milk. They were from a meditation group. We came out of the tank, and greeted them. I was getting prepared to meditate, but the people that came as a meditation group disturbed everybody else; they played loud and obnoxious music, this horrid version of some dub-step. The girl in charge kept telling them to calm down but they didn't listen.

Dream fragment 2 11pm-3am" Eavesdropping Spider": The earliest memory I have was with me and my dad we were on top of a hill and this women was drunk. A successful women, drunk and belligerent. We didn't want her to do anything reckless and kept telling her not to drive drunk. Later on while we are walking. I found this piece of contraption, it was suppose to control everything in the world. My dad asked me if I could teach him how to work it, I told him I don't know yet and I will find out. There was this manikin and I commanded it by the machine to move back and forth, simple commands at first. Then I started making it dance. My dad said, "what is this? you made it too complicated. How can I learn that?" I kept telling him that he will not understand. I made couch, located in the middle of the street, levitate. I found a key inside of it and I gave it to my dad. My dad's face lit up with happiness. As he was celebrating a spider from the couch ran across my body, a big spider maybe about an inch long. The spider was covered with eyes and its legs were red. It didn't bit me, but it squirmed around me. I finally flicked it and it tried to run. Luckily, I trapped it in a bottle. It stuck it's eye out the bottle like those old unrealistic classical cartoon shows. After the incident with the spider, the environment changed into my house. My sister walked through the door and told me that she was going to see old church friends, and she asked me if I wanted to join her, I replied yes. She had an argument with my dad before we left though. I tried to break the ice by mentioning the eavesdropping spider, which had his little eye popping outside the bottle looking at us. They laughed and forgot about the incident. Me, my sister, and old friend, Big Am, were walking together. We met this random enthusiastic man, we walked with this man and met the couple from "Never Let me go" the guy from Amazing Spiderman worked on that movie. Well I said hi to the couple and we walked away with the enthusiastic man, he was so happy to see us that he introduced us to his wife. She was waiting in line at the post office. For some reason they gave out post office like movie tickets from a window and you wait outside. I said hi and quickly moved because a lot of people were waiting in line. This women asked me if I was in line I said no. She then started handing out grades like teachers do in school. I saw some old friends there and they were upset that they didn't do so well. I was now inside my room and Bt was in the room with me. I was talking about mathematics with her. I told her about the complexity and flexibility of mathematics, precisely Calculus II. she told me she knows. She said it used to be one step or two step to solve a problem, but now you have 5 steps to solve one simple problem. I told her about the class I am going to take Calculus III and how the teacher is a tricky old Asian guy. I made a joke that she didn't quite get I said, "he presents problems like Confucius, a riddle".

today i dreamt i was on a mountain with many vegetation
it was a sunny day, i looked to the mountain peak, and decided to try
to climb that. when i arrived there, i think my mom told me
there was a higher peak than where i wanted to climb.
i looked above again, and i saw there were 2 ways, 1 for a lower peak
and one uphill way where it had more vegetation, that was the highest peak.
so i planned to go there this time. my mom told me it was very hard to reach there.
but after i got there i saw some group of teenagers. sitted under a red umbrella.
they were playing, and i saw 2 kids playing, trying to catch each other, 1 jumped
the high peak to the beach, and i thought to myself. "they are crazy!"
then i lay on the towel and on that shadow, sun wasn't brighting my eyes anymore.
A girl sitted between my legs, and this dream transformed into a wet dream lol.


Dream elements:

-mountain
-sun
-group of teenagers



Technique used: MILD


hours slept: 14 hours

today i dreamt i was rubbing my hands on dream, i was walking somewhere
and telling myself "i want to feel my body here" i was walking somewhere in a random home.
i was touching things and trying to felt them with my body, after trying to touch a few things
i think for a few seconds i was between life and dream world, it was a very weird experience.
it was like, a part of me was a bit on the dream world, but other part was on the real world.
i was in a bedroom with 2 beds now, i wanted to spawn asuna from sword art online.
i wanted to give her a handshake, i thought to myself "Asuna will spawn behind me."
then i turned around and didn't work, she wasn't there.


Dream elements:

-rubbing hands



Technique used: MILD


hours slept: 14 hours

I took a nap yesterday since I was beat from barely any sleep the night before and decided to try to WILD. I was very relaxed and had many scenes and thoughts drifting around my head. All of a sudden I found myself somewhere and I 'knew' where I was and what was going on, that feeling you get sometime in a dream that you just know something even though there is no evidence to support it. Anyways WILD: On a hillside with big rocks almost buried. We were fighting waiting to fight the Germans. They would run down the hills and sit on our heads and necks and either fart or pee or both. As soon as the motion started of the dream I woke up realizing what was going on jolted me from the dream. I wont count this as a LD though since it was probably less than 5 seconds.

Last night I tried 5htp as a sleep aid and it seemed to work, I slept a little restless but peacefully. This morning had this pretty vivid dream.

Game of Thrones setting/time. I was in a kingdom and we were on a very steep hill trying to conduct business. I had a couple of flags from other kingdoms I was trying to get up hill. We were the step children of the kingdom, I guess we didn't have it very good. So we were getting made fun of thorough a window from a girl/queen of another kingdom. I went down to the window and ripped the screen off and grabbed her head and pulled it through the screen (game of thrones style). I got a little trash talk out of the way when the body guard came up to me with a spear/weapon, I released her and shut the screen. The lord of our kingdom just got back from the store, he had gotten some portable flooring and some outside chairs I guess to spruce the place up. There were a lot of people sitting around and I helped him get things set up. Moved some of his wood flooring parts and some IKEA chairs onto it. That's about it.