non-lucid

Preface:
Went to sleep late, around midnight. Had a very busy, awesome day with a friend.

DR1

I was in a new house. I decided to work from home today, so I was seated a a table in the dining room (working on a laptop). My sister was in the background somewhere, moving around.
I heard a noise that sounded like a truck parking in the driveway at the front of the house. I looked outside the window and I could see large grey/white truck, hitched to a trailer, parked in the driveway with the engine running. The driver was eating a sandwich. I called my sister over to the window and told her what was going on. She said, "wait a minute", and she went outside and told him something. He slowly backed out of the driveway. When she came back in..she said he didn't know the house was now occupied. I can't recall much else. I can only recall feeling annoyed that the man was parked in the driveway.

First fragment

I was with group of adventurers, we were fighting our way up an incredibly tall tower. We were fighting with horrible monsters.

First dream

I was in school. It was a really hot spring day, during a break I was searching for a place where it's a bit colder. First I went downstairs to the second entrance, there were kids running around and playing. It still was too hot, I went upstairs and opened a window. A cold breeze blown through the window. As soon as I opened it, teacher called us to class. It was mostly empty, there were like two people left. They had an important exam, while teacher gave me a golf ball that opened itself, revealing more balls. They were all written with text about second world war and authors that written during that time.

I remember I was with my mom, dad, and cousins from my mom's side of the family. (Is it just me, or do I dream about that particular cast of characters quite a lot. Maybe I could narrow a few of my dream signs down if I note that it's just them.) Anyways, we were in this huge hangar bay. There were shuttles, ships and equipment. My dad told me that we were on the set of Star Trek. In order to make the show cheaper to produce, instead of building a set, they built a giant Enterprise building on the ground and simply filmed at night.

I remember in the middle there was this huge atrium/foyer type room. Supposedly on the show this was where the ship's reactor was. (I don't know if the reactor is in the middle of the saucer, and some Star Trek fans are probably getting aches right about now.) This was where when the show was filming, all the actors and crew would come for a break, and in this museum setting, it was where all the patrons could come for a break too.

My dad said it was time for us to go, and my cousins whined a little because I was leaving. It was weird because even in the dream, I wasn't feeling well. He took me out in the parking lot. (It was a big parking lot) and started walking me back to my car. I remember the snow plow had made some mistake and there was a giant mound of snow that we had to climb over. With my sluggish dream body, even this simple task was a challenge. When we got to my car, I saw that the hood, both doors on the left side and the passenger door on the right were gone. For some reason my dad tried to divert my attention.

He hinted at something about people that take parts off cars in large parking lots and steal them. We got into my dad's old van and started driving somewhere else. I took one last look at the enterprise building. It looked different now, like just a circular office block and two warehouses. I remember we drove over some train tracks and I lost the dream.

(NLD+1)

-WBTB to have the mother of all diarrhea attacks at 2:00am because I'm sick-

(WBTB+2)

I remember I was walking what felt like the nature trail that runs behind my subdivision. But (contrary to the last dream that was barren, snowy and cold) this one was lush. The trail was long overgrown, the pavement cracked to the point of essentially being cobblestones of asphalt with saplings sprouting through it. I could still sort of recognize some familiar landmarks, but the factory and the clean water plant that are tucked away behind my sub were crumbling under all the new growth. Supposedly all this new jungle growth had to do with climate change.

I think I was walking with someone. I forget who, but they eventually got ahead of me. I got stuck at a waist high fallen log that I couldn't muster the strength to climb over. So I just stopped and sat down on the crumbling pavement, and admired the beauty of the rainforest. I remember the dream was pretty vivid. I think at some point I saw some kind of lemur or monkey characters swinging from the trees and hand a longing for feeling better agian so that I could be free to swing from the trees like them.

NLD (+1)

-WBTB that sent me scrambling downstairs for a glass of water at 5:30am-

I was on campy. I remember there was a new complex on campus, by far the biggest building. It was 10 or 12 stories, and was attached to two parking garages, a monorail that ran around the campus and a nuclear cooling tower. I'm not sure entirely what the purpose of the building was, but as far as I knew, I had nothing to do today, so I might as well pay it a visit, and see what it's like inside. The first thing that I remember was finding some sort of workout room/gym. As soon as I found it, a pair of identical girls stepped outside and snapped a couple of selfies. For some reason this was irritating to me.

Then there was a boy who had a speaker system and music player on a cart. He didn't look college age, easily late middle or early high school. He had buzzed dark blonde hair, freckles, and chubby cheeks despite having a very thin body. He wore a light brown tee shirt. Some EDM started playing and this kid was a wicked good dancer. I asked him what he was listening too. I don't think he replied. I asked him if it was by SynSun. No reply.

I stopped. Maybe he couldn't hear me over the music. Well I can't shout because I'm sick and- wait a second, why am I on campus? I was going to stay home today. How did I get here? (I do a nose pinch reality check) Yes, I didn't expect to get lucid while sick, on the first night of the comp- wait, why did the text turn black?

Dangit! Quick! DEILD!

(DILD+10)
(RC+1)
(DEILD+1) Only counting this for one point for DEILD because although I did return to the dream, I wasn't lucid.

Well I went back into the dream, but I had lost lucidity. I was now back outside the building where I had been in the beginning of the first lucid dream. I was looking up at the monorail and noticed that I was at the end of its route. When it came to a stop. It jolted itself so violently that it lifted into the air.

It went away again and another train came. When this one came to a stop, half of the first car was hanging of the edge of the rail, and it banged into the side of the parking garage. I thought that this was a serious problem with the monorail so I told myself the next time a train came, I would snap a short video and take it to security or something to have them stop the train. I waited. I heard a steam locomotive coming, and it came. This one made no effort to stop, and derailed, hurling right at me. I dropped my bag and rolled out of the way, just a few feet from the train.

I saw the train had broken a pipe on the side of the building. I wasn't sure if it was gas or water, but I wasn't about to take chances. My bag was soaked in the stuff, so I just forgot about it and ran, thinking an explosion was only seconds off. I remember a DC pulled up next to me and stopped me in a flatbed semi, with a million bright red oil drums on the back. He asked me if I was the one who had ordered the [large number] of explosive barrels for my minecraft level.

I kept running. I think as I made it around the truck the red barrels became Minecraft TNT, and the dream shifted to a random meadow.

It must have blown up, because I awoke with a jolt. Strangely, I don't remember that bit.

(NLD+1)

Night Total: 17

Interesting how my illness, the thing that I thought was going to drag me down, actually made me get lucid.

Really potent dream state. I had been drinking at a party that night, but I had still never experienced dreaming quite like this, alcohol or no. There was no REM rebound either, dreaming began almost immediately.

--- --- --- --- ---

Lying back into the hammock, still a little intoxicated from the party, I begin to drift into sleep. I am in a room off to the side with some other people who have turned in for the night, while in the lounge room a small group of party-goers keep going strong. My eyes shut, the music doesn't bother me.

I am flying over a fantastical modern city. Huge buildings stretch up into the sky, incredibly detailed. The way my three dimensional perspective shifts is incredibly realistic. As I have experienced before, the movement itself causes the visuals to solidify rapidly.

I am wandering through this dreamworld. I find myself in a penthouse apartment of sorts. There are many well-dressed, influential people here. Some hold glasses of champagne, others speak in hushed tones. It seems that there is an event of some description on. The rooms are vast and the decor minimalist. I am definitely amongst the upper echelon of society, but there are distinct underworld currents here and powerful ones at that. Women in stunning dresses sip at cocktails, a man deals cards at a table, and there are people coming and going from an oriental meeting room. I try to peer inside but the security is eyeing me suspiciously.

I wander into a side room. There are people here being 'sold' for exorbitant amounts of money, but they are all very keen to be here. There's roughly half a dozen of them, dressed in white robes, male and female and all glamourously beautiful. They aren't slaves or prostitutes as such, more like high-status consorts whose loyalty is bought, trophies to be displayed. There are a few people bidding here. By entering the room, I have unwittingly entered myself in the auction, but I am not at all dressed or prepared for such an event. A price is named for me. It is low compared to the others, but still in figures that I could not expect to see in my lifetime.

A pixie-eyed man, one of the actual party-goers from the waking world, leans over and speaks to me.
"Not bad at all, but I will attract a much higher sum."
He did, of course. He wasn't gloating so much as stating fact, this was their profession.
"What other purpose is there to life than to be as beautiful and glamourous as possible?" He believed that it only made sense for everyone to aspire to this ideal.

It was then that I had a 'false awakening' in the apartment. I get out of the hammock and stagger into the lounge room. The party-goers are still up, awake and energetic, but very aware that they are dreaming.
"This is what we do," the pixie-eyed man explained. "We go out exploring this world at night. We thought that as you were here, we would try to wake you up as well."
It had worked for me, but all the others who had turned in early were still sleeping in the room I had left. They were too deeply asleep to be pulled into the dream.

They began to explain that they went by aliases while dreaming to protect their physical identities. It made sense to me, except that the pixie-eyed man had been making quite the name for himself as a rogue lucid-awakener by the name 'Anderson'. I got the Matrix reference. It seemed he had been pulling a lot of people into his dream adventures recently. I recalled seeing his name at an earlier time, somewhere in another dream, and warned him to be careful.

It was too late. Eyes were already upon him and his group. An illuminati-style organisation had taken interest in his activities and decided to put a stop to them. Their methods involved misleading and blinding individuals with familiar glamours. They wouldn't even know that they had been restricted to only existing within their own personal dreamworlds.

We had to flee, running out into the corridors. Desperately trying to escape the clutch of our pursuers. The party was split, we were forced to break up into smaller groups and head out into different directions. But we kept getting lost, funnelled only down the paths that the organisation dictated. And then we would awake again in that lounge room. Lights off, only two of us this time. We'd look at each other and run out into the hallways. Awakened again, this time a couple of others. We were all confused, scared, frightened. Awake again, and again, and then I opened my eyes.

I was physically awake this time, lying in the hammock. The very people I had been dreaming about were in the lounge room outside, dancing and doing shots. But I could't hold onto my waking awareness and fell back beneath the waves. Awake again, same lounge room, but this time I was alone.
I ran out into the hallway, none from the group in sight. I followed the paths through the building desperately, and finally this time I came to a location I had not seen before. The hall curved around into a room with an alcove and a tall window looking out over the cloud-shrouded buildings beyond. The city I had seen as I flew over it at the beginning of my journey.

I stopped, looking out over the breath-taking view. I became aware of two figures that had been waiting here. One was a man, silent, clothed and hooded in black robes. I had a sensation of knowing him, a name; the Angel. The other was a man in a simple work suit. He was from the organisation, or at least knew of my predicament. It appeared they had been speaking before my arrival. The man from the organisation approached me and began to converse with me. He explained that given the circumstances, I would be free to go.

The dream shifted and time was lost. I found myself walking through a busy train station. There were escalators and shops, commuters going to and from platforms. I wandered around, perhaps keeping an eye out for anyone I may know, but I needed no goods or transport.

Last nights dreams were pretty awesome but I had to get up early and then had a pretty shitty day. Still, I wanted to write this up since it was so cool. I would have been able to write more if I had been able to do it in the morning but oh well.

Dream
I was in a world with magic and stuff, it was pretty mind-blowing.. Around me is a forest full of glowing fauna and flora, it's sort of a high-fantasy realm or something. There is a couple other people I think, and you can travel to this magic world by a portal using certain magic items. I've got a couple and I share them so that me and the other people can travel to the other world. I think I go there twice in the dream, the first time I recall being chased by a bear-like magic beast that was indigenous to the area. The second time was the time I remember properly and was when I brought the other people with me. I gave one a nut (as in a nut and bolt) and I had one too, except mine had another ornament in the centre. In the (somewhat ordinary though still slightly glowing) forest, we walk up to these 2 stone marks on the ground and the nuts activate, teleporting us to the magic world. When we arrived we got chased by a few monster animals, I decided not to kill them, thinking it'd just be easier to take my friend(?) to a safer area. We sprinted through the forest and ended up at the safe zone. I have a feeling it might have been a colossal sized tree with a grassy area around it.

There were other dreams I had last night which were awesome, and another hyper-realistic dream I had during the day today. I've been napping most days for about a week or so now, which is really unusual for me.

Morning of April 11, 2016. Monday.

Dream #: 18,011-02. Reading time (optimized): 2 min.



My dream is a science-fiction scenario, but it seems as if I am in a movie. It may be taking place in the present but with fictitious technology. I am with an unfamiliar girl and an unknown man. There is a teleportation system. The girl has a black spider pillow (about the size of a couch cushion) that looks somewhat cartoon-like. There is a teleportation mishap.

I am lying on the ground in the woods with the two others. The girl is sleeping to my right. Most of the legs had come off (or had been cut off by the teleportation malfunction) of the spider pillow (a play on my dream self not having real legs). It briefly squeaks as if it is alive or is a robotic pet, but this idea fades, and it is only a pillow.

Instinctual awareness of being asleep (the pillow, sleeping in my dream, and quantum Zsuzsanna sleeping near me) does not trigger conscious recognition I am dreaming. (My waking-life identity is absent.) I wonder what is going on. (As a spider visually represents the human hand, this is a possible play on having my hand on or under the pillow while sleeping.)

Another teleportation malfunction occurs. It seems to be part of a spying technology but goes awry. We end up in a candy and confectionery manufacturing building in New Jersey.

We wander around while the girl seems to have breathing issues. An older woman who behaves like a housekeeper on an old American sitcom gives her something that I first thought might be candy but is medicine. It takes place in a big room where numerous long wooden tables are in an equidistant arrangement.

My attention wanders to where I try to find something in a big telephone book (seeking communication while in the dream state). I search through the yellow pages, but I am uncertain if this is what I should be doing. Soon, I seem to find what I had intended to see more of - movie listings. The print on the small movie posters is so little as to be unreadable. The features are on two panels shrunk down and rotated to be displayed lengthways. It seems to be because movie posters and theater scheduling information is not as important as residential and business listings.

I mentally magnify the page to read some of it, but soon realize I am doing it without a magnifying glass. As an illogical consequence, my sight returns to normal, and I cannot read the tiny print. I realize I need to find a magnifying glass, but I do not see one.

I am in the Loomis Street house living room, but I still see it as the candy factory. Long chunks of dust hang from various areas of the ceiling and walls. It seems no one does any cleaning. I consider I should vacuum the rooms even though I am not an employee. On another level, it seems natural that more and more dust should accumulate.

---

Went to bed at 23.30 and tried to meditate a bit. Don't think I stayed awake very long. Woke up at 3.00 to go to the toilet, remembered nothing. Stayed up for a WBTB, probably not long enough this time, but I'm afraid to stay awake way too long if I stay up to long. WBTB didn't work because I woke up from the alarm at 7.10.

Room in the attick
I'm in a house (not ours) with my husband and we go into the room in the attick. It's cleaned up now, before it was so messy that you could hardly enter it. Along two of the walls are large dressers (I'm not sure if this is the right word in English) Both wood, but different colours. Two drawers of the left one are left open. I pull my husband on the bed and we make out a bit. He gets up and starts collecting things to go and have a shower. Two (young) men enter the room. (I think "I'm glad I'm decent"). One of the men is the owner of the house, the other one (to whom he's showing the house) is a young version of Darrau. The owner, a long and skinny guy, tells Darrau about the room. "Over there we used to have the trains, and there the Playmobil". They speak French. At a certain moment one of them uses the word "relance" in a way that I don't understand. I ask for an explanation. "But a 'relance' is asking for something again if there is no reaction to the first time you've asked?" Darrau answer that in fact it is that, but sometimes it's also used in another way.

Wrote this dream up, went to the toilet and tried another WBTB. I got a lot closer but woke up again from a non lucid dream.

Another room in another attick
My husband and I woke up from the alarm. He had to get up to go to work. My best friend (from the period 13 to 17 yrs old) was in the room with us. Without saying anything he made it clear to me that I had to get her out of the room because he had something in mind. I told her that she could go down to the bathroom, she'd find a towel in the narrow high open cupboard. She left and my husband started unbuttoning my jeans.

Then I woke up, there were noises in the house (holidays, the kids are there). I tried to go back to the dream but the noises prevented that.

There was a leader in our group which I think was BadAssLongCoat and we were dealing with the invasion of what I think was Team Dewey into what was clearly my old house. I was living in the bottom floor of the house and there was a yard out the back which the invasion took place. We had had a problem because they had tried a couple of times to infiltrate and I'm afraid we felt they were looking to steal, kill and take over our base. We were taking the invasion very seriously but I did not realise how serious the weapons Team Dewey had. BadAss was checking my old steps which lead up the garden which was the most likely place they were to come down when I looked up and was really shocked. It was BlairBros with the most serious Bow and Arrow I could ever imagine aiming it directly at BadAss. "Watch Out" I shouted. It looked like the bow and arrows from Hunger Games. It was made of black graphite with a steel tipped arrow. BadAss would not survive if it impacted. I went running into the flat to find what I could to help with this battle. I found the biggest knife that we had when we were small in the kitchen. It had a blade on top which looks like a serpents tongue. When I went back to the yard I was sure BadAss would be dead but he was dueling BlairBros in a hand to hand combat. I grabbed BlairBros by the head turned him over and ... well put it this way it wasnt pretty. I don't know who won but I was surprised that I wasn't scared.

It's daytime and I'm sitting in a sort of park/playground. I'm with a few other adults. I remember one of them being a white woman. I myself alternate between being myself and being Sherlock Holmes it seems, the version from Elementary. There are houses built around the park in a U shape. In one of the houses, behind the window of the top floor (3rd?) is a man with quite a big camera. We consider it odd. I decide to go check it out. No one is willing to open the door at first, though at some point someone opens the door and then slams it closed into my face.

There's a boy in his early teens who is scaling the wall to get to the 2nd or 3rd floor and enter the house from there. I tell the kid to come back, because it is dangerous. I myself consider using the same approach, but I'm afraid that the final part is just too dangerous and I might fall there. The boy makes it though and opens the front door for me. I enter and go to the 3rd floor.

I encounter a white man. We end up in a conversation, though it's not a particularly friendly one. It's more like bad guy explaining his evil plans. This house used to be owned by his brother, who may or may not be dead. He's here with his camera to capture an image of his ghost. Supposedly. He's explaining that he's staging the whole thing for some reason. Meanwhile I'm holding a camera in my hands and the red light tells me that this whole conversation is being recorded.

Eventually the man wants to give me a silver necklace as a present. I, as Sherlock Holmes, tell him I can't possibly accept. He insists. I take a hold of the necklace and he pushes my dreads out of the way. We then move to a mirror standing against a wall. I look into it while he is standing behind me and putting on the necklace. My face has rashes. I knew it, this thing is poisoned. I take it off and rub the thing all over his face. He ends up dead not too long after. I open the window and want to shout to Watson (Lucy Liu) but my throat is jammed. I instruct the kid through mumbling. He shouts 'Watson!' a couple of times and eventually she comes over.

Watson is upstairs, the situation is sort of explained and it's decided that I need medical attention. At some point I wonder how I'm still alive, considering that this guy died really quickly.

I'm downstairs with someone. A boy in his late teens. We want to leave this house and close the door behind us, but the frontdoor never locks. Eventually someone else tries to open the door. She can't. It turns out that the ghost of the guy who lived here did this. It's his way of telling the boy and I that we are always welcome here. Touching.

I'm walking across a football (soccer) field now. There's some big event going on, international teams, the works. I'm now Wesley Sneijder. I still need medical attention and can't really talk. There's some ceremonious stuff. Then I jog off the field.



I'm sitting in the passenger seat of a car. My mom is behind the wheel. We're in a dark parking lot. My old driving instructor approaches us in his car, which is far off from the car he has in reality. My mom think it's creepy and drives off. I explain to her who he is. He probably needed a favour. Poor dude. Didn't his wife leave him? We follow him over the parking lot for a moment, but decide to just leave. I still can't talk too well due to the attack in the previous dream.


I'm sitting at a table, across my white, female teacher. She has to (re)evaluate my exam. I've written a part in pencil and am allowed to track it over with pen. It feels a bit weird. My hand seems not steady enough. Eventually I'm done and we end up talking a bit. She hands me a piece of torn paper and asks me to evaluate the lecturers of this course. I can't remember on what lecturers have to be assessed. Besides, shouldn't this be anonymous? I consider for a moment that I think that she's hot. A moment later I take a close look and notice it's my older lecturer. No, definitely not hot. Way too old! Didn't I already fill in the evaluation when I made the exam for the first time? I feel kinda stupid that I'm the only person in class who has to do a sort of resit. I'm not the only person who suffered through that attack, yet I'm the only person traumatised enough to mess up. Ow yeah.. I did shoot and kill someone with an assault rifle...

Spellbee2's Spring Extravaganza Competition 2016

(I always date my DJ entries with the new day at midnight's number)

2016-04-10
20:00 COMPETITION START
22:00 bedtime

2016-04-11
00:00 (night #1) asleep
05:00 wake with recall, room is stuffy, nose is blocked, get up

+(D1) battle in a large rectangular open stairwell with stairs running up/down all around the walls [DREAM SIGN], I'm flying and jumping between the levels and battling the opponents. In the end I win and chain the opponents on a large ledge next to a big drop-off, one opponent is just a head with hands popping out, there are two more opponents sitting dejected on the left two positions. The chained head is in the 3rd position on the right. I direct the chains to flex and push out the head over the abyss and so it will fall to its death. I'm thinking the other two guys are totally at my mercy and hoping I don't do the same the them but they didn't like the head guy, either. I jump out and float/fly down and the head is still alive. Then the head turns into a hot girl and I get a bit bold [DREAM SIGN]

Spoiler for bit of a sexy time:

I go up to the girl who's sitting there leaning back with legs spread and dress hiked up and panties exposed, and reach for her (ahem) and rub it a bit on the outside of her panties. I ask her in a sexy voice, "Do you like that? Can I do this?", she's spouting a stream of talk and takes a quick aside to say "yes" before continuing her nonsense. I then reach inside the panties for direct contact with her (ahem) and it's all gooey and greasy and oily and I say/think we need to get you cleaned up.

+(D2) I'm driving towards my neighborhood [FALSE], approaching an intersection, and turn right. My old place is just ahead on the left, and I now am DO and someone else is driving, some people who don't like me and are wondering if I still live there. As the car drives down I look to the left and see the row of low bungelows including mine, the front door is open, and inside are large desks, it clearly is uninhabited, I've moved out. The people will probably be happy that I'm not there any more. Going forwards, it's like a typical CA apartment complex with parking spaces arranged all outside the low buildings. I'm looking at the spaces and see they're all empty. Where are all the people? Away on vacation still? [a bit of beginning critical reflection, I'm thinking about the experience]. Up ahead there is an apartment with some decoration on the outside, at least someone is still living here. I'm looking at the car ports, some of them are covered, and some are not, some are reserved for apartments I think, and some are not. The covered single space carport doesn't leave a lot of room for you to get out on the side. The view turns 90 degrees to the left and heads in to an open uncovered spot but it's right in front of the stairs and this is probably not a free spot.

+(F1) blue sky and sun, I'm outdoors with my wife daylight (by a motel swimming pool?), I look up at the sky and notice it is a pure, even, cloudless blue with a single bright round white/yellow sun in it. I remember the sky was like this earlier. I point it out to my wife.

+(D3) On the street outside childhood home [DREAM SIGN] with my kids, there is a lot of firewood here that needs chopping somehow. I don't know how I'm going to do this. Ah well, might as well man up, get an axe, and do it. It'll take a while because most of the pieces are too large still for just an axe and need further heavy splitting by a mall or wedges. I have an axe with a small very sharp head but it doesn't fit well on the axe handle. My son is also setting chopping wood with axes, and is setting up next to me. I make sure we separate farther apart so that we don't hit each other. I'm trying to fix the axe head on to the handle and it's not working [DS]. I try to put a little metal wedge in the head of the handle but that causes the handle to splinter and split. I'm reading the instruction manual for the axe head, which while of foreign manufacture, has its instructions in English [DS]

Spell's comp begins tonight (For me, it's meditation, big glass of water for wee-back-to-bed, and bed). I still sort of can't believe I actually am trying a competition. (Well if I don't like it, I won't do it again...) Anyways, since I tend to reside in the dream journals section more often than the forums, I'll drop these here so I don't lose them in the gatling gun of posts that are abound to happen on Spellbee's thread.

And as my crappy luck would have it, I came down with a fairly bad headcold the day the comp starts. So I might be a couple days late before lucidity kicks in.

OLD: Waterbending
OLD: Firebending (Outside of flight)
OLD: Become Female

NEW: Earthbending (Reasonable Scale, move a boulder at least as big as myself)
NEW: Airbending (Reasonable Scale, Strong Gust of wind, Mini Tornado, etc.)
NEW: Encounter/Confront tsunami dream. (May overlap with Waterbending)
NEW: Teach Manei (My dream guide) how to defend herself/fight. I will consider any length of instruction (Even if it's just a single move) a success.

Three Step Task: (Mmmk I wanna challenge myself with things that haven't worked in the past. But doing all of these in the same LD... whoo...)

-Element Manipulation (There might be overlap with personal goals. If there is, I will take whatever score gives more.)
-Teleportation. (I think there's a dream spell that I can use. Tesser-A-[Destination])
-Basic Summoning. (I've done this before, but I'm out of practice...)

...

Also, dream frags and stuff. This is from the morning of the ninth:

I vaguely remember something to do with a pair of mice or mice like characters. They lived in a large castle lived by an evil greedy king. There were these two mice with long fur, that looked like little fuzballs. They had tiny swords too. Supposedly the mice were actually enemies of the kingdom that had been transformed into mice by an evil wizard. This was a punishment for attempting to rebel against the kingdom. There were more and more of the long-haired mice over time. Eventually they plotted to poison the kind and all of his men, and were successful.

...

And from this morning:

I remember I was walking outside with my dad. I remember looking up at the sky and noticing that it was yellow and green, with a huge anvil shaped thundercloud. This prompted me to do a nose pinch reality check and become lucid, but I forgot what else happened after that. I was happy I got lucid though.

There was more from this morning. Some of it was sexy. (I think I'll be omitting all sexual dreams for the comp.) Some of it was just bland muck about school and an old bully.

I had a very long dream, sort of based on the movie They Live. I was in an old school that had been painted over to make it look new and there was a principle there trying to convince me that it was a new school. I was looking at the lockers and the dates on them said 1960, at this point i realized the people were lying and I kept trying to convince the other students this whole place was some kind of prison. The dreamed then changed to take place in a super market and I asked the cashier if he heard that weird signal, he looked at me and laughed. The signal was coming from Saturn. It hid the aliens from view, they were really tall and had long fingers and were sort of driving the herd of people like cattle, or a crossing guard telling people where to shop, and what to buy. I saw them, they saw me and tried to choke me, i ran and got away, and then saw the whole world was a prisoner of them. They were everywhere and in total control. We were just fat little pets, running in a maze, easily controlled. But if you block the signal, you could escape, then i woke up. I waited all day to type this, because it was so crazy and I didn't really want to post it.

Non-lucid – Notes – lucid – Interpretation

I am in a basement. There are a series of 3 rooms next to one another, used for sexual activity. We are 3 couples coming out of each of these, though I am unsure if I am with someone at this point. From the 3 rooms we enter into a larger room and head towards a door on the right hand side.

We are talking about a larger sex assemble which is to take place in a bit. I know I won't be participating and I think there is another woman who won't either and so while I am exiting the room I look over my left hand shoulder to spot and make sure that the woman is leaving the room with me.

4-5 people go back into the room, while the woman and I remain in the adjacent room. This room is darkly illuminated. There is a sofa and an oblong coffee table next to a dividing wall that separate the larger floor plan into two major rooms – where we have just been in the other one. From the point of view of the sofa, which is located at the centre of the dividing wall there is a small kitchenette up to the right, right next to a door that leads into a room I never see, but notice that a fairly bright white light is flowing from it.

As we all walk out for a break the woman who is also not participating in the group session – she is very skinny, with shoulder length hair and is wearing loose beige (?) trousers and a dark green t-shirt, she is a head or two shorter than I – tell me in an asking tone “Is it ok if we don't have sex but just cuddle up a bit.” “Sure” I reply, a tad disappointed, but not a lot.

We sit down in the sofa in our separate corners. She lies down with her head in my lap and flick on the television, which is over right next to the kitchenette on the left hand side – opposite the door with the white light. The first channel is a two way channel – which is intended to show the other room what is happening in ours and we will be allowed what is happening in the other room. The woman tries to flick through the channels – at first we seem to be stuck on the channel we start out with – but when we finally get going there seems to be porn on all the channels. After having flicked through a couple we settle on the two way channel.

At this the woman turns frisky and direct her attention towards me, she turns her head upwards and kiss me, gently at first but with increasing vigour. We both start opening our mouths more and more and eventually I feel the cold sore at my left corner of my mouth rip open, a typical searing pain and a slight sensation of moisture, but I don't care I continue to dive into the kiss – feeling excited and horny as hell. Eventually I start adjusting my body posture, trying to roll with the woman into the motion of getting down into a laying down position – thinking yes, nice a sexual encounter is in the making. She reacts fiercely standing up in the sofa and starts rearranging the pillows in the sofa. At first I think she is making more room for our endeavours, but I soon understand.

“Traitor!” she proclaims “We had an agreement!” she continues.
“Yes, and I was going to keep it, but..” I reply.
“You can't be trusted!” She interrupts. She doesn't seem to understand that I really didn't mind not engaging in a sexual encounter but that I was fully open to do so if that is what she wanted. The situation had evolved from her desire and her initiative.

Feeling it is a lost battle I simply place myself in a tailors position in my end of the sofa and look her in the eyes – she has deep brown eyes. She starts talking about something that happened to her with her dad.

Sensing that it is a recurring pattern I ask her;

“So did this or something similar happen with your dad before?” I ask, sensing there is something like a fear of flying.
“There was an accident” she goes on – at this point the conversation is blurry to my memory – and she explains that either something similar happened at the age of 6, or later at the age of 21 – but essentially she is either saying that something happened before or after, with the other age representing the first event we were talking about. She starts looking rather pale, and slightly taken aback, I can see the surprise in her eyes that I am willing to sit back and talk therapeutically with her despite her recent judgement of me as being a traitor – which might actually refer to a generalisation of men she has developed.

We are interrupted at the conclusion of the sexual adventure happening behind us. There is a large window, with large black curtains obstructing the view. I start becoming aware of sounds from inside there, just a few moments before they enter the room we are sat in. I get a feeling of some sadomasochistic adventures happening and feel a slightly forced disinterest in knowing about the details.

When the people come out and start making their way towards the kitchenette, Jackie comes over to sit down, as well as a black man with long dreadlocks, though his hair isn't as greasy as you would expect from this hair style. I feel slightly embarrassed as I am no longer wearing my trousers and pants, though I still have my long woollen socks on. The black dude knocks me on my shoulder, and Jackie comes over with a glass of Orange juice and playfully say “Ahh it is good to see you asking for so much to drink” referring to it being a typical expression of recently having had sex and also to the glass of water I had drunk just a little beforehand.

I have a blanket covering my genital area, which helps with the embarrassment, but I also feel deceitful for the others misjudging the activity me and the woman were engaging in. From the kitchenette they start talking about their fascination with a flail-like whip, which is what they plan on using next.

I feel a strong urge to get out of there and I start making my way towards the doorway out, which is on the left hand side – leading into a small stairway, which is gloomily lit and dark green.

There is a slight skip.

I am now outside. I am walking down a road, there are trees and hedges along the side walk, and it is sloping downwards as I am walking down on the left hand side. It is dark outside, it seems wet and somewhat windy as well, it is raining. The light from the street lights seems gloomy and contains no warmth.

I continue walking downwards, having a conversation with Ronan, though he isn't actually present. We are talking about the option of setting up a company each, for 5 kroner, and then swapping companies – somehow this is relating to the treatment centre I am about to start up – and I am surprised he agrees. I recall something about a Facebook conversation where we were chatting and we came to the conclusion that the only thing we might have in common is Aesthetic taste, but that this might be cause enough to meet up anyway.

- this is relating to an earlier dream I had, the conversation took place at a street close to where I lived previously, lots of yellow building about, during the daylight. I recall the trouble of typing during this dream.

As I am walking along during this mental/technological conversation I come across a tent. It reminds me of the attached tent of a caravan. It is dark blue and from behind the plastic windows a greyish and eerie light shines through. I am aware of the strings that hold the tent in place, as they are extending out to the road blocking the path of the side walk forcing me to walk around them.

I am still heading down the road when I become aware of my shoes – they are getting wet and I wonder why I am wearing my slippers outside in this god forsaken weather. I look up and to my left and see the state library – rising above the darkness of the tree lines, with only a hint of the light of the street lights reaching the top like an ominous tower. I feel an increasing sense of unease, but carry on downwards.

Not long after this the water levels are rising and I feel like I know the bottom of the road will be completely flooded, blocking path to get home. I look up and back over my right hand shoulder and spot the road I can take which will also take me home. I turn around and start walking backwards. I feel like my vision is starting to slip – like fade completely – and I become increasingly afraid that I will loose my sight completely. At the same time I start feeling intoxicated, like proper drunk and my movements become erratic and unbalanced and I desperately reach out grasping for the strings of the tent for support. And while I find them and grab them they can do little for me as my balance continues to deteriorate. I think it is a bit weird as I didn't drink a lot back at the porn complex, but I can feel that I have definitely breached all levels of safe intoxication. My conscious perception seems to turn into a series of broken mosaics, as if invisible lines of fractures appear before my visual and spatial perceptive capacities.

I become so scared at the rising water levels and my continued diminishing balance and think to myself “Shit I could actually drown in this state. I am a poster boy of how not to get drunk.” While entertaining this thought fear levels keep rising, and then boom – I step into a pothole that is maybe a metre and a half deep and find myself too drunk to get loose – fear becomes panic as I struggle to get free.

The rain keeps falling the water is murky, brown like the colour of mud and there are multiple pieces of foliage, sticks and branches adrift on the watery road.

Finding myself terrified and sure of my death, I wake up.

Immediate interpretation: The cold sore bit was hugely disturbing to me as I woke up and is referring to a situation with Karen recently, where I knowingly kissed her before telling her that I had it. I became immediately aware that I am not completely free of selfish tendencies, which is also related to the knowledge that when I am practising so much self control during sex, I am liable to release more pre-cum, which of course increase the risk of pregnancy during unprotected sex. Knowledge I have kept to myself. It symbolise how I have been willing to put my own selfish needs in front of both her and our needs, a tendency I was deeply ashamed of upon awakening.

The black curtain shielding the view of the other room in the dungeon represents a boundary – black, the colour of nothing – meaning that while I am intrigued with exploring new aspects of my sexuality there are still areas I don't find meaningful to explore. Only if I fear exploring it does it make sense to do so, though this is not a fear based response – it is simply not interesting to me.

My interaction with the woman represents some of my concerns with Karen – that she asks for space, and then also take initiative for sex. It represents my confusion with it all, but also my willingness to take up the role required for her personal growth. The tad dissapointment could represent my feeling of repressing my sexual advances towards her to accommodate her need for space.

The interaction with my embarrassment regarding the others who assume we have had sex, while we haven't I believe represent the uneasiness I have felt in describing my relation to Karen to the outside world. I am trying my best to avoid putting labels on it, and while I don't find this a problem in our personal relation or when talking to people who frequent Tantric environments it is difficult to describe this mode of being in a relation to “old” friends and family who are not participating in this new-found spiritual journey I find myself on. I am somewhat afraid of what Karen thinks – if she would prefer I don't mention her at all, though that would violate my need to be open about what is important and meaningful in my life.

The drowning in the puddle represents – I looked this up as well, I was aware of the meaning of water representing unconscious emotions surfacing – that I might be forcing the issue. Before looking up the theme I thought to myself “Hmm now you have invited her into your inner most private world, of course we dive straight into the dark side – as represented by the cold sore bit”. I then looked it up and it could mean that I am forcing unconscious feelings to the surface prematurely, which makes sense against my immediate thoughts on the matter. It might make sense to keep certain dreams or aspects of my dreams private – it is ironic that we have talked so much about giving and asking for space and we then end up attempting to dream share, effectively eliminating space between us entirely – however as I was awake and praying for the spiritual purification of selfish tendencies I also felt that it made sense to dive into this, as she could help me face the issues and as such transcend them.

Having looked up a variety of dream themes I am increasingly aware of the truly wide variation of what people interpret stuff to mean, which has led me to the conclusion that it is primarily the immediate interpretation that matters. When I am baffled by a theme, object, colour or person I will look it up as and when needed and find the one that resonates most clearly with me. I also think this is a great way to start working on making symbolisms of dreams more translatable and better capable of communicating clearly between the two states of consciousness. Also regarding the privacy I spoke with Karen, and it dawned on me that some dreams can only be understood when analysed against other dreams or contextual events, which might necessitate “sitting” on them for a while as already mentioned.

10/4/16 (Lots of long and vivid dreams tonight)
Dream 1: I was travelling around Sydney road and all of the old churches around there. I saw there were two next to each other, one on either side of a road. One was an old, crumbly one made of dark grey stone, while the other was newer and made of orangey-brown stone. I decided to investigate the dark grey one and went inside, then climbed up to the top. I went back outside, this time in the belltower, and surveyed the view from up there. I think I then did some research about the history and significance of this particular church.

Dream 2: I was at home and one of my favourite bands, Ne Obliviscaris, were there for some reason. They were doing a show nearby but had decided to rest at my house. My dad seemed ok with this, and we somehow organised for them to play a little show out the front of our house. Unfortunately some of their members either weren't there or were injured, so my brother and I had to take up two of the positions. I think my brother picked up the bass and I chose the violin and singing. We set up the equipment and speakers and stuff out in the driveway and a small crowd gathered. My brother and I were busy rehearsing and feeling nervous, but soon enough we were on. The rest of the band started playing and I tried to keep up on the violin. My brother was having issues with the bass, and before long he actually snapped a string and the performance grinded to a hold. The two other members actually arrived then so they could take back their instruments. The bass player didn't seem too upset by the broken sting, more amused than anything. While the band was setting themselves back up again my dad made me run and fetch some bee for the crowd waiting around. I then found a trumpet somewhere and tried playing it, but I couldn't get any proper noises out of it, and the crowd laughed at me a bit.

Dream 3: I was at a sort of museum with my family. The museum had a ton of different media there; books, posters, tv, movies, art etc. displaying everything significant that had happened for the last 50 years. We walked through there for a little while before emerging in the gift shop. My dad was looking at something and my brother found all of the game of thrones books and showed the size difference and stuff o me. My dad asked if he wanted them but he replied no, saying he would never read them.

Dream 4: There was a guy giving a speech, like at a media conference, where protesters interrupted him by showing a baby cow in his way. The protesters were vegan, and I'm not sure what the guy had done to earn their wrath but he certainly seemed quite uncomfortable around the baby cow and started to panic as the protesters screamed at him.

Dream 5: I was a dinner party with another family in an oldish wooden house. We played a bunch of little games to decide who would be sitting where and who would first and things like that. I remember it being quite intense and the verdicts were final, there was no escaping it. I think my grandparents were also there, overseeing the whole thing.

Dream 6: I was at university and had just finished a class. I went to a KFC with my brother and some friends. They ordered some big bucked of chicken and I got a pie, which little did I know turned out to cost $45000! Anyway we went outside to eat, and somehow we ended up on the banks of the Nile river. I told them that unless this pie was the best thing I had ever eaten I wouldn't pay for it, but realistically I wasn't going to pay for it anyway. We sat over the edge eating, then after a little while two of them started to go into the river, however they said the air was incredibly hot over the river so they returned to sit on the bank. My brother told a story about how Iron Man wasn't allowed in Sumeria and so they had a laser protective field over the river to stop him from entering. As we finished they began to talk about how I was going to pay for the pie, but I told them I had a plan. As we went back inside the KFC I approached the guy who served me and began to shout at him. I told him how unethical he was to give me the super expensive pie when it was obvious I wanted the normal one, and how I demanded a refund. He got really angry but could see he was in the wrong and only made me pay for the regular pie, but I could see he wanted revenge and he took down my name and stuff. We went back university for the next round of classes, me feeling slightly worried and guilty, and sat down waiting for the lecture to start.

Dream 7: I learned about how apparently "pussy" Is a vulgar contraction of pussifiliation, which is where music changes due to the accent differences between different cultures. I was then transported to a rocky beach with cliffs around me and ancient stone structures forming pillars around me and a huge circle to my left. The sky and water were both grey, and the water's current was strong. For some reason I jumped in and began singing a four-line song in the 'proper English' manner and swimming to the beat of it. I made some headway against the current, but was going sideways, closer to the giant circle. I then switched to the American way of singing, and suddenly the current was buffeting me back as the timing of my strokes changed. I was forced back for a little while before I changed back to the previous method and slowly but surely made it back to my original rock. As I clambered up I realised how freezing the water was and now I was shivering uncontrollably, soaked through my clothes.

I titled this take me to church because it was fitting & ironically my ringtone, lol.. Dream 1 was just a dream fragment about a boyfriend I had in middle school but that's the extent to which I remember it which was a bummer. Dream 2 was more vivid where details were concerned but not very colorful except I noticed curtains that were a form of deep red which are basically the color of my own curtains in my living & dining rooms. So anyway, I was in this very large cathedral type of church w/ a lot of big winding stairs. Kind of like the ones in the school in Harry Potter, but they didn't move. I was taking care of a bunch of kids, mostly teens & we had to complete 3 tasks that were on these little pieces of paper. I didn't seem to do any task, this was just a given it seems. But we ran out of paper & I sent some of the kids down the stairs to gather some more paper slips w/ tasks but they came back empty handed. So, I decided to go myself w/ a few of them. One of which seemed like I knew them somehow & felt very connected to this older boy. But when I went down the stairs I was told that there weren't anymore available slips but that since it was lunch we could have lunch at this time. Someone led us into a cafeteria where they were starting to put the food away & we started to fill our trays & then I woke up.... It was almost like the dream was supposed to symbolize my quest of learning new information & the tasks represented the TOTM somehow. Like it I did, A B & C, I'd get the answers I was looking for. I woke up w/ the feeling that I should watch some video's on YouTube or something of people playing spin the bottle to trigger it in a LD. I'm hoping I find some because dreams of all sorts tend to have snippets of movies I've just watched or things I've just seen or memories that have fluttered through my brain during the day, etc.