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In the dream, I’m watching a film. I think I was watching it on a screen at first, but in the part I can remember well, I’m just standing on scene, watching as events unfold—or, rather, fail to unfold, as this seems to be the kind of film where nothing much happens.

The main (and only present) character, a man, is in a kind of apartment with a desk or a dresser that he’s sitting at. There are no walls: I can see directly into the strange landscape beyond, where the horizon is dominated by mountain peaks, including two volcanoes. The action is divided into distinct segments, with each one ending anticlimactically. In the last one, the man calls his girlfriend on his cellphone, but nobody picks up. This seems to illustrate the unremitting futility of life—or at least you’d think it does, based on the dramatic treatment it gets.

But once that comes to an end, all sorts of odd things start happening: a nearby pool of water starts to bubble, and one of the volcanoes erupts. I’m now in the backseat of a car with several other people, trying to get somewhere safe. But then the other volcano, which is straight ahead of us, also begins to erupt, the bright magma spilling over the rim. The woman who’s driving comments on it. I tell her she’s got the name wrong—she’s thinking of the other volcano. The one ahead of us is Vesuvius. And then I start laughing because of course what matters in this situation is making sure we get the name of the volcano that kills us right.

I’m also laughing because I’m fully aware of how ridiculous this geography is. I know none of this is real, and that makes it hilarious. As if in acknowledgement, all kinds of odd and impossible things are appearing out of nowhere around us, even as I watch. A gigantic man wearing a striped shirt materializes off to our left, over a large body of water. He steps from island to island, striding in the same direction our car is going. I’m still laughing too hard to speak, and so it’s someone else in the car who says it: “I found Waldo.” They also seem to find the whole thing funny.

28.4.18

I am place under hand cuffs by my manager at Dominoe's , he and other co-workers guided me to this location where a lot of people were playing basketball and surprise me with it. Then let the hand cuffs off me and my manager told me I was on team sprite, the soda drink. I went out there and as I am running I remember I was suppose to tell my manager that I am quitting today. I bump in to him but he seems to be completely indulge in to the game.

He points to a direction that he wants me to go and so I dash there and manage to get to the ball. The basketball feels a lot heavier than a regular one should feel. That's when I observed it closely and notice it is actually a bowling ball. I began trying to roll up mu sleeves to gain a better grip but was having trouble doing so. I could swear the shirt I am wearing is alive as it would roll itself down immediately. I then had a false awakening.

I appear to wake up lying in my bed. My laptop was in front of me and had been running the game league of legends. It was in searching queue but as I continue to observe it I notice something was wrong. However it didn't matter if I observe or not I was lucid the second I awoke from the fall awakening. I just started thinking to myself, should I lay here and play league of legends or should I go outside and observe my inner world.

I decided to observe my inner world as I knew it was something that needed to be done. I want to find peace, I walk out my room and in to the living room. It was a reddish color and dark rather than a yellow lighting. I then approach the front door which was now a huge wide white metal door. I open it and walk down the apartment complex stairs. I could feel my feet touching the water from the rain outside.

I made it completely down and notice that the sky was heavily gray and the rain was pouring down profusely. I tried walking in it but the rain was hitting me so much that I had trouble walking through it. I then remember a lucid dream back in 2014 where i raise my hand and made all the rain stop in mid air. That was my favorite moment in all my lucid dreams. So I decided to try it again and raise my hand. I began to focus and all of sudden as I thought it was working as the rain began to slow down with in a few seconds.

But I was wrong, instead the rain became intensively violent. I could hear the sky making a roaring sound that hurt my ears. I knew what I was doing was making things worse so I stop focusing. The sky and rain began to go back to the normal rapid pace it was at in the beginning. I walk through it as best I could in till I saw rough waves flowing my direction from a mountain. It hurled me to the floor as I regain my footing. I look around and realize there was a mini tsunami coming down another mountain so I decided to move out the way. A few other large waves came knocking me down.

So I decided to climb up a few rocks to gain some form of shelter. I notice there was no one around at all. The outside had nothing but a clear road with some broken down houses and just a lot of flooding and rain. My hear began to beat loud and could now hear my waking life body breathing. I knew I would be awake soon. I close my eyes and performed a DEILD. As I was starting out a false awakening and could see my dream bed. I blink my eyes too many times and woke up.

This dream took place in a city than my brain identified as Dubrovnik. And it wasn’t entirely unlike Dubrovnik—it was by the sea, and in the right sort of general landscape, only hillier, and it did have a similar aesthetic. This wasn’t the first time I had a dream set there, although I don’t think I identified it as anywhere familiar that time.

In this dream, the city seems to be gearing up for a festival, with some tents and stalls already up, some still being set up. The city is full of people, which strikes me as an unusual circumstance, as if I’ve been living here rather than a visitor like them. As I hear people talking among the crowd about the best route to a certain location, I know the answer. But right now, they’re heading in the right direction anyway—at least, if they want to see the preparations along the way, which is what I want to do.

Across a canal or some kind of long, rectangular pond, there are yet more people near a fountain, including someone I know—an old classmate of mine, an Italian exchange student. She and an unfamiliar man are embracing there. In front of me, some other people I recognize as classmates have also noticed, and they don’t like what they see. One young woman in red makes a disparaging comment rather loudly, clearly intending to be heard by them. I don’t know what the story is here, but I find it hard to believe that it could possibly be any of their business.

I run into her again later on, as part of a group of performers, doing some kind of open-air act—oddly, it’s as if they’re all hovering above the water of a canal like the other one, only wider. I wave to them as I pass, and they wave back, but nobody else is even acknowledging them. I have the impression that they’re afraid to for some reason.

At some point, I’m further up, out of the city proper. I pause to look down a broad stone staircase—really, more of a terraced sidewalk—that winds its way down to the sea. The sea is shining and calm, pale blue and pink, as if the sun only rose a short time ago.

And further still, there's some kind of special site. I climb on a big rock to get a better look at it. The whole area is blocked off with a sheet of glass and has a rather stage-y appearance, as if it were intended to be seen from this angle. To the right is the entrance of a cave, where cacti and other scrubby plants are growing. To the left are four reclining chairs in a row—I assume that means this place will be open to the public at some point, since I can’t imagine why they would be there otherwise.

The ground they’re located on breaks off with a sheer cliff face which I’m directly facing, and I can see something interesting there: some kind of symbol carved in the pale stone. It's a small circle with two lines inside it, which are arranged like the hands of a clock when it’s 10 o’clock, and coming off the bottom is a long, wavy line ending with a wedge, like an arrow. It strikes me as vaguely alchemical. I wonder what it signifies—it definitely seems to suggest some kind of downward motion.

Some other people have gathered here while I’ve been looking—I recognize someone else I know. The last time I spoke to him was very awkward, but he doesn’t mention that, which I’m glad of. He’s telling me about the cave. But unfortunately, I can’t remember much of what he says—only that something important took place here a couple millennia ago.

8.4.18

- Walking along a narrow canal path. Someone tries to stop/rob me but I jump into the water and swim away.
- At a hotel a local dish is being prepared on a long tresselled table by a woman. She is layering rings of fish. I talk to her. Later we are offered some food but its not vegetarian.
- In our house we have 3 big screens set up in the front room. Each with a bright interactive display. The next morning we get up from downstairs and my cat tells me it wants to go on a dance programme. I go to pick it up but it tells me to put it down again. It is pale coloured and sleek. It asks me to open the doors as obviously it cant do that itself. There are two downs on the narrow hallway going upstairs. I find that the programme the cat wants has downloaded incompletely (hacked) and so doesnt work. The cat goes on a drawing programme instead and uploads something it had been drawing. Other people go on other things. I find a picture of a fox so it can get the right colour for its drawing.
- At my parents house I'm trying to help my dad get in without a large about of dogs also getting into the house.

Morning of April 6, 2018. Friday.



This morning, I had a very long series of dream sequences, where nearly everywhere I have lived in my life thus far appeared in one form or another, including several fictional distortions. As usual, each setting was a unique new version. (Out of tens of thousands of dreams studied for over fifty years, no setting has ever appeared more than once in the same way, typically being unique combinations of two or more locations.)

As the sequences were so long and convoluted, I will only focus on certain sections in this entry. (Otherwise it would be far too long, and my entries are often very long as it is.)

The house setting throughout my main dream seems to be a combination of Cubitis (where I have not lived since 1978), the Loomis Street house (where I have not lived since 1994), the King Street mansion (where I lived at different times up until 1993), and the house Zsuzsanna and I and our family presently live; all this and some fictional alterations as is always the case. Additionally, the house setting does not match the location in some scenes and ambiguously varies between Florida, Wisconsin, and Queensland, Australia (which is also typical).

In one scene, the setting seems most like the Cubitis house even though it is implied to be our present address in Australia. Our youngest son is crying and is angry about some sort of robotic toys that are not responding to being shot in the way that had been programmed. I am aware that he had left them at the south end of the Cubitis hall (while the room to our right is like the lounge room of our present home). I tell him that it does not matter, that they are “just toys” and that toys cannot really be heroes. I hold him close and we hug and he says that I am his hero.

In a later scene, I go outside and it mostly seems like the Cubitis backyard. An unfamiliar young girl is present and sitting in high grass with our youngest daughter and youngest son. Looking back at the back of the house, the rendering is incorrect (though my dream self does not regard it as wrong). The area external to where the kitchenette would have been is now implied to be a back porch that I am aware is out from my mother’s room (though as from the Loomis Street house). (The back porch was actually at the south end of the Cubitis house facing the south side yard and the north end our neighbor’s house, though their back porch faced east into their backyard.)

There are at least three unfamiliar people seated on the portico (at least two males and a female), near the window to my mother’s room. (The portico is an unfamiliar fictitious feature.) It takes me some time to realize they are trespassing. Finally, even though they might be our neighbors, I decide to yell at them and tell them they should not be here. “The little woman said we could sit here,” one of males says. I consider that they are trying to imply my mother told them they could sit by her window, which I know is something she would never have said.

I again tell them to leave. They become annoyed and start acting very strangely, and wander quickly about as if they are unsure where they are going. Soon, there are two unfamiliar male police officers present. The unwelcome people go into the house next door. Soon after this, water starts spraying out from the eaves. This causes the police officers to start laughing. The water continues to spray from the house as if it is meant to be an attack, yet has the opposite effect. As the water sprays on me for a time (as well as the officers), I feel more relaxed and cheerful than I had been minutes before.

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Water in my dreams has been a form of dream state induction for over fifty years in representing the essence of sleep, the absence of emotion and waking life focus (as in sensory deprivation tank experiments), and resulting in physical relaxation. Some “interpreters” claim that water “represents emotions” (which might be related to crying, I suspect, though crying is the release of emotions, not the maintaining or augmenting of them). Which emotions? In what way? To what extent? Aside from that, virtually countless commercial recordings use the sound of water, from the roaring ocean, waterfalls, rivers, and so on, to induce sleep or relaxation. Negative dreams relating to water, such as tidal waves or floods are more likely to be a RAS factor that tries to induce sleep when other factors, such as circadian rhythms dynamics, are in conflict. After all, a person is asleep when they are dreaming, not extant in waking life, yet most people do not seem to understand this at all. In some cases, a flood or tidal wave may relate to subliminal concern about being too deeply asleep, which may trigger waking from the emergent conscious side rather than raw RAS. The supposed evidence, more so of the Barnum effect, associated with “water representing emotions” is actually the opposite. If a person is overly emotional in real life, the water might be rendered to calm them down and enter more deeply into the essence of sleep, and some people fear deeper sleep or even relaxation. Drowning on the other hand, would usually relate to incidental sleep apnea or snoring (and one can dream and snore at the same time despite popular myth), which is a biological factor of sleep, not waking life (though many people seem to have zero understanding of the biological and neurological factors of the dream state). Ultimately, when water splashes on me in my dreams, it vivifies my dream and sustains it, causing physical release and relaxation, the opposite of increasing emotions or as a WAF (waking alert factor). Water also represents healing and biological purification (after all, a large percentage of the human body is water - and water is life), but more so as the autosymbolic analogy to the healing nature of sleep and the absence of negative emotions, thus a tidal wave or flood might indicate a sudden increase in glymphatic system function.

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I'm trying to get home from about Mason's house to KC but there are people from the mob coming to kill me. I'm looking on the street and seeing different houses around the main guy's house and wondering why anyone would want to live near the mob since it would be a lot of pressure to have to go to events you were invited to. Trying to get home, the street with the big hill is blocked by 4 or 5 mobsters running up the street at me. I run right towards Owen's but it's blocked that way too. Before they can come kill me I decided I want to wake up and do so.

The dream scene was getting off of a boat. I think I'm now in a different country in Africa. The boat unloads us onto a dock with a shop attached to it. I'm looking around at various items looking for a Coca Cola bottle. There are a few soda bottles but I don't end up purchasing one. I remember I wanted to find a local that would show me the best places to get dinner and thought maybe a hostel owner would know.

The dream opens up into this massive place of shops that looked like cabins and then a massive pool and amusement park as well. I was swimming in the pool and talking to some people I didn't really know. Then I'm around the pool deck. I'm wearing a full suit and do a side flip into the pool, accidentally kicking a girl which disappointed a girl I had talked to earlier.

I meet up with my friends, I think moo and kolby were there. We were walking down this path and on both sides we were passing these massive water slides that were gushing water out. We decide to go on this one ride. We walk into the room and it's filled with black padding and cushions. We're confused but then all of the sudden the floor below us just gives out and we're free falling down. People are hitting different obstacles made of cushion and everyone's laughing and having a good time. I don't hit any obstacles so I get down pretty quickly.

We go outside and look at more water slides. Looking up into the sky, there are two massive rides that were red and white. They must've been more than a mile up into the sky and stood straight up except for a slight curve in the middle. I got a little freaked out to the point where I couldn't even look at them, I thought they were really unsafe. We took a short ride up into the sky to get a better look at the massive rides but the little white ride hooked and then went back down.

On the ground we were back at the pool area. It looked more like someone's backyard or a hotel area. There's small townhouses made of wood and black/blue glass surrounding a small pool and hottub. I'm in the pool swimming back towards the main pool and shop area when I see johnny b with a very long nose which I thought was interesting. They come out to the main pool area with us and I'm seeing people from my high school swimming by. One is Celia and the dream ends as we're in the back of a car. I'm now watching myself third person having intercourse with her.

I'm in a city. Talking to someone about flying. I see a commercial airplane high in the sky, so I tell the person I will fly to that. As I get closer, I reallize it's flying too fast and it will fly above me before I get to it. But I see more con trails and I can fly to those if I miss this airplane.

Trying to fly to the highest building. Not much luck going fast. But trying. Hopping from one building to another. Trying to trick my dream around me by standing up on the building and pretending it's the tip of the tallest building. The dream changes and I'm standing very high up, looking down the city is far below me in the deep.

Mexico-

turist attraction 3 places, long, round, long, whales are migrating swimming through them, people watching, taking pictures. I pull out my camera. Whales come through a canal into a smallish round room, they rest there, we watch them, then they fall down through a waterfall into another canal thats much lower than the room. I'm taking pictures, amazed at the majestic beauty of the animals.

Trying to drive to north east tip of Mexico, where Caribbean waters on the left meet Pacific waters on the north. (Yes, I had the geography wrong). Talking to some locals about the drive. Then my vision zooms in and I can't believe how turbulent the waters are up north. Incredibly huge waves are crashing against each other, colors of brownish and white. It's spectacular.

I was grabbed by a man with black hair and a beard. He held my hands with his, and his hands burnt me, leaving tattoos on my flesh. I ran way and got into a car on our journey an ambulance reversed at us without putting on its lights, we swerved out of the way. Arriving at a swimming pool (water sign of the day, lol) , I had a son in the dream instead of a daughter. He fell into the water with his coat on, I followed in after him. Then a vision appeared of my partners mother (who has passed away) who we sorely miss, I looked and saw that my partner was looking to. Then the apparition vanished. We both acknowledged that we had seen her.
Next we were visiting a library but the neighbourhood was like a no go zone. There were alleyways with gates at the end leading towards the centre of town. We headed off down one feeling apprehensive. Then the dream got really vivid and I could see the tattoos on my hands from before. One hand had white and green patterns like a frog on them and the other was a spikier pattern. I started to peel the tattoos off , like wet thick paint the flesh peeled away. On the second hand there was a thin black leather clasp also under the flesh with a buckle. As well there were piercings like those for someone's belly button.

I’m driving in an unfamiliar town, where I’m going to attend an event of some kind. I have the impression it has something to do with Kyabje Düd’jom Rinpoche? At first, I’m trying to find a parking spot near a junction, but all the spots there seem to belong to the nearby buildings, so I turn the car around and head towards the waterfront, closer to where the event will actually be held. It’s a long, straight street with small, gray paving stones and narrow, wooden houses painted light colors on either side. At one end of it, I can see boats, their masts blocking the view further out—to the harbor itself, presumably.

I look around for house no. 11, which is where the event will take place, so I can park nearby. The address plates are large and clearly display the numbers, rather like the Prague address plates do. The plates seem to be in the right general order, and so I don’t have trouble finding it—but there do seem to be both odd and even numbers on a single side. I’m not sure whether it was this that clued me into the fact that I was dreaming, but it definitely happened right around then.

This is a dream: what will I do? Checking out no. 11 still seems like a pretty good idea, but first, I decide to take a look around the area. I walk along the street, towards the harbor—but as I walk, it seems to change from a street to an underground tunnel, and when I reach the end, I’m not by the open sea, but looking into a square room full of water. It seems completely closed off and is made of some yellow-red stone, mossy where it's close to the waterline. The water is packed with boats—not big ones like I saw before, but little ones, more on the order of rowboats.

There’s something a little ominous about this place; it’s impossible to imagine what purpose it could possibly be serving. If this were a Zelda game, I’d fully expect the door to slam behind me and some giant monster to rise up out of the water and attack. I wait. The water seems to be rippling in a rather odd way. After a little while, a couple of larger waves swell up, rolling beneath the layer of boats. But they just die down again, and the water becomes perfectly still. I watch for a little while longer, but it looks as if that’s all that’s going to happen, and so I head back towards the house—now, an entrance partway along the tunnel. I open the door and step in.

An Asian woman greets me: it seems I’ve been expected, although there doesn’t seem to be any kind of a gathering here as I thought. The woman also seems to be expecting me to have a female friend along. I consider telling her that I’m here alone, but actually, there’s no reason I can’t invite someone else. I tell the woman I’ll send them a text message and they should be here shortly.

I pull my iPhone out of my pocket. But somehow, all the people I can think to invite are male. An idea occurs to me: I start spelling out A-N-I-M-A using the numbers which correspond to those letters. The phone is a bit shifty, as such devices often are in dreams, but not enough to impede me. But partway through, I remember that I’m not supposed to have an anima, being female and all. So I make it end U-S instead and send the ‘coded’ message off. Well, I guess I’ll see what happens. I put the phone back in my pocket and we sit down at the table in the next room to eat.

The table is a large one, but there are only three places set—hers, mine and the empty one. We have some kind of fish dish, which tastes good. Not much in the way of conversation is happening, and so I’m mostly focusing on remaining aware, making sure I don’t forget this is a dream. It’s an interesting feeling, being here in this place, which feels so real and yet so unreal. I could get up and do something else, but I want to see where this is going.

But at some point, I wake up—due to some environmental noise, possibly. But it’s only a short time before I fall asleep again, and find myself back in the house, in an upstairs bedroom this time.

Through a window, I see branch falls onto the roof of a neighboring building—a large, blocky structure. The roof looks like it’s in bad shape, with large chunks of tile missing—this place must have got hit by the storm too, I figure.

I’m eating a cup of yogurt there. It’s chalky and bland. Probably low-fat. Why am I eating this awful stuff? This is a dream, I don’t have to eat it. I place the cup on a dresser or some similar piece of furniture. Downstairs, I hear the door of the house opening, voices in conversation—somebody has arrived. Maybe it’s the person I invited in the earlier part of the dream. I’ll go down and check. But right now I’m wearing a nightgown, so I ought to put something else on first.

I step over to the full-length mirror, which is standing near the door, and look at my reflection. I’m wearing a plain nightgown, like a short dress with spaghetti straps. Oddly, I don’t seem to look quite like myself—my face is different, though not completely different, and my eyes seem to be the usual color. I step back. It’s been a while since I’ve done this—and actually, I’ve never done exactly what I’m about to try, but it doesn’t seem like it should be too hard. I’ll create myself something more appropriate to wear. I extend my hands, palms upward, feeling energy gathering.

But it doesn’t feel right—there’s some kind of a resistance there. As I notice that, I also see something standing behind me in the mirror—a furious-looking panda bear approaching me. I turn around, looking into the room—but it's empty. There's nothing there. I look back at the mirror: furious panda. Well, this is a little creepy. But because it’s a panda, being furious just makes it look ridiculous rather than menacing. I step backwards into the room with one hand behind me, feeling for the spot where the panda ought to be based on its reflection—but I wake up before I can get to it.

6.3.18

Laying in bed with light streaming into an unfamiliar bedroom, I look outside to see nothing but water up to the level of the window. It looks nice and clear. There is a raised bit of smooth rocks which the water is streaming over and what appears to be a lake beyond.
I then use my powers to shift the bedroom (not sure why) to somewhere where there are people. Can't remember much else.

Can't remember start of dream but I was trying to swim in the sea but I was having to swim down to get something. I was getting dragged down and potentially drowning. I decided instead to give up on whatever I was trying to get. I remember the water was quite clear and I could see shafts of sunlight and sprays of bubbles.
Instead I made for land and washed up panting on a sand bank. I then tried to escape but found I was not the only one there. I was in a war zone. Others were huddled there in-front of a wall. Going over the wall would mean being shot, as the place was crawling with soldiers in old style uniforms with rifles. it would be suicide to make a break for it in any direction and suicide to stay as we would be shot on sight.
As I waited there men came into the compound, clearly criminals thought the soldiers let them through. A skinny lad allowed them to drain something from his leg this clearly was sapping what was left of his life but it was a trade off for allowing to stay a live. They offered us the same deal :/

I am near the bar in a restaurant. It looks quite rustic, there are a few people behind the rectangular bar area, one is a lady with long black wavy hair.
There is a sliding door at the back, Japanese style. I sense people behind it and see in my minds eye some people with guns, one has a long rifle.
I use my powers to paralyse the people. I notice that there are more and more people coming in at the back. They do not appear to be soldiers but I take them all to be "the enemy" that is invading this space. I then start sending what look like multiple water balloons up into the sky that rain down on the intruders, paralysing them and then making them disappear.

Had a great dream last night, but by later in the morning I forgot everything, except that it was in post-apocalyptic world.

I remembered it all much later in the afternoon, while watching TV and seeing a dog brought back recall, even though there was no dog in the dream that I can remember.

...I grab something from invading soldiers, run to the cliff over the ocean and want to throw it in the water to neutralize the threat. But the water is too far from there, so I run alongside the cliff until I feel like I have to throw it, because they are catching up to me. I throw it and it would have fallen in the water, but there are some sand banks and it falls on one of those. I believe though that it's far enough and they won't find it.

One soldier chases me across the sand dunes with some grass on them. I see a hole in the side of the dune,bit smaller than the size of a laying person. I squeeze into it and I'm watching the soldier and his shadow as he is looking for me. He stands right next to my hiding place and I just hope he won't find me.

Before all that, someone threw a revolver into a huge pile of sand. I'm looking for it, because in this lawless world weapons are valuable. Before that, there was something about a wooden walkway in the large body of water.

I wish I remembered more.

Morning of February 9, 2018. Friday.



Today marks my 24th year in Australia and in being with the girl of my dreams, Zsuzsanna.

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I am going to try something new here. As I still have tens of thousands of dreams I have never posted online, including thousands from before I was even a teenager, I might try entries that include sequences of specific types in a series of no more than 12 for a specific part of the sleep cycle. Although I usually recall at least six longer dreams per normal sleeping time, there are many more of different but basic types that are mostly autosymbolic of the transitions between different times during sleep and of which I usually just pass through without drama. I am going to try this to see how it goes, randomly selecting dates, after this one, from over the last fifty years to see how the autosymbolic content has remained unchanged for the most part and perhaps note influences when I can. In some cases, I might include a very short summary of a dream I had already posted if it falls into the sequence of a certain dream type and time. The dreams are listed in reverse order, last one first. (Missing numbers are either related to private sections, abstract stages that cannot be described in words, or too long to post online.) (To quote the Yo-Yo man, “Try to remember everything you passed. But when you go back, make the first thing the last.”)

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12th There is one farmer working in a rice paddy. The water is lower when I look again later. (My dream self vaguely recognizes this as autosymbolism for the cessation of the dream state, water lowering waking symbolism, which has been as such since early childhood, having occurred as such through thousands of my dreams.) I do not speak to him but recognize the essence as RAS (personified preconscious). I eventually become aware that RAS has transmuted from a Filipino rice farmer into a Caucasian cowboy. He stands before a fence (my side), which is the division between dream self identity and conscious self identity, and I walk past him through an open part of the fence to wake. I do not speak to him, he nods, and I nod back. RAS mediation as utilizing a fence is less common than porches and doorways, or even parking lots, but does occur on a regular basis. RAS is typically more dominant or even aggressive when a porch is rendered as the waking space, probably because it implies that my dream self wants to remain “inside” for longer (that is, not wanting to wake yet).

11th I am walking over a large high truss bridge (unknown location) over water. I do not see any traffic. A bridge is autosymbolism for a transition in unconsciousness and the water lowers to become the rice paddy scene of the next segment.

08th I am walking through a circular tunnel, which I first consider, with a level of wariness, that it is the Large Hadron Collider. Still, it is mostly a featureless silver tunnel. I eventually consider it as just a transition between different levels of unconsciousness after briefly wondering if it is the inside of an airplane with no contents (including no seats or flat floor). There is sometimes a very vague sense of wariness when walking or sliding down through tunnels, not exactly claustrophobia (as I do not have this in waking life), just some sort of unusual level of awareness triggered by semi-lucidity. This is not usually the case with hallways of which are the same basic autosymbolism (dream state transition), though less transpersonal.

05th I usually have one dream per sleeping period that is either prescient or of another inexplicable factor. I am in the backyard of our present home and there is some sort of distorted event related to five cats in a large rectangular container full of dirt of which may be a plant pot. I get the impression they are not alive, being half-buried in the dirt, but the feature seems unusual. The cats are not fully grown. There is an odd impression that they might not be “real” cats, for example, a perception of thread instead of cat hair, and an odd sort of composition, and even separated “parts” of cats (though still five in total). After waking, Zsuzsanna had shown me an older cross-stitch she had done (of which she had taken out of a rectangular plastic box this morning, with no way of me knowing that she would be doing this). There were five cats on the item, with different coats, but each of the same appearance and sequence as each from my dream, though she had related the cross-stitch as being prescient of our final number of children and the ratio of girls to boys (based on the appearance of the cat’s coat as certain coats are only common to certain sexes, such as most gingers being male and most tortoiseshells being female). This does not mean there is any symbolic connection to my dream (that is, of the cats being linked to our children), as prescience and shared dreaming is often mixed in with other factors. The symbolism still validates the prescient connection, the cats being in a rectangular box, not being “alive”, and of an unusual appearance of thread (cross-stitch thread) mixed with hair.

02nd I mentally light a candle to see where I am (unrelated to the apnea events I experience very rarely, which is like mentally trying to will a candle flame back into existence with the fear it has gone out) and it is a small copper-walled room without much space. There is a focus on having recently taken the vocal out of David Essex’s “For Emily, Wherever I may find her”. “What a dream I had. Pressed in organdie. Clothed in crinoline…of smoky Burgundy. Softer than the rain.” Solely the isolated vocal plays from a gramophone, with an eerie echo. Sometimes when I strip the vocal out of a track in real life, it takes on a very unique quality, especially when I add certain kinds of reverb. I was thinking of using the isolated vocal in a new dub track I had already started (not for commercial purposes of course).

00 Induction stage. I walk down steps with the intention of going deeper into the dream state. They are outdoor concrete stairs in an area near buildings of which are covered with vines. When I was very young, I learned to manipulate levels of unconsciousness by going up or down stairs in dreams (in both lucid and non-lucid situations, as I have recognized dream symbolism for so long, I was manipulating it at six years of age - which eventually became non-lucid habit), which is autosymbolism for traversing the specific level of unconsciousness (and is used the same way in hypnosis and meditation). Outdoor stairs are sometimes modeled after the ones in Veterans Memorial Campground in West Salem (Wisconsin), where I sometimes spent time as a young boy.

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There was a before and after from this dream but it escapes me right now.

I'm in a game. I think my sister Abbie is there. In the game, you enter a room from the ceiling, from some sort of portal. It seemed like a light in a way but at the same time you could see through to the other side of the portal. The object of the game is to enter the room, find the object in the room, touch it (or maybe destroy it), and then return to the portal. When I got into a room, I had several other camera angles on the corners of my vision which would hint from another angle where this object was. It was sort of like a 3D maze and I had to go through it to find the object. The gravity seemed a little bit like water without having to hold your breath (even though you don't really need to in a dream). I would find the object, go to it, touch it, and then there were other players in the room that would fly into the entrance portal with me into the next room. It was a cycle, at the end of each round we'd excitedly fly towards the entrance and into the next room.

At some point, the portal drops me into this abandoned room. There's dressers and washer machines stacked up in the middle of this dirty room. A voice tells me that this round I have to find my way through. This scene is much dirtier than the other rounds. In the other rounds, the obstacles were crisp blue objects and the space was clear. This place seemed brown and toxic. And yep, here comes Pennywise the dancing clown again. He pops up from a washer machine in the back of the room. He starts to run at me, moving washer machines and dressers aside. He starts to grow larger and larger as he runs towards me, we zoom out of the house and I realize I'm on Owen's street. I'm not sure what happened next.