Recent DJ Posts

I dreamed I was inside of a building at night, or early morning and had an argument with some people inside, so I walked out. It was dark and the parking lot was full of cars, then i heard a series of loud bangs and impacts on the wall beside me. I saw a guy hit the dirt to avoid bullets as smoke popped off the walls where he was standing. I looked to my right and saw a dude wearing a brown vest, blue jeans and maybe a ball cap holding a semi auto rifle. it was weird looking, he cocked it by twisting the barrel back and forth and then he started shooting again. people started running everywhere. i got behind my car and i heard a voice tell me to get behind the engine. i reached into my car and got two pistols out. a little 380 and a glock with a rubber coating on it. i don't own a glock and it felt like the gun was coming apart from it's coating. i put a round in the chamber and crept up behind some other cars to try to get close enough without being seen. the dream turned into a free for all with everyone walking around with guns out looking for this guy who had just vanished. I woke up and turned on the television only to find that there was an active shooter at joint andrews...that turned out to be some kind of drill...not buying it at all.

I don't think visitations or ghosts or life after death are true (and moreover, I don't want them to be true) but being objectively sure that something didn't really happen doesn't change the fact that you believe it while it's happening. In any case, I'm not so foolish as to not accept peace that is offered to me, regardless of how it happened.

This isn't how I normally post my dreams. This one has left me with some pretty weird feelings all day. And it's hard to write about so I'm just going to ramble it all out as it comes to me without worrying at all about writing correctly or choosing the right words or whatever. It was very intense.

I'm walking through a hall in a dark noisy restaurant when I think I see H. I see people who look like her at first glance all the time out in public, but this time she recognizes me also and comes up with a HEEEYY!!! for a hug. It scares me at first, then I realize it really is her- inexplicably. She looks good- healthy and smiling. Her hair is cut like right after C was born. She's vibrant.

Something must've changed for me in recent months because I felt none of the usual desperation to grab her by the shoulders and shake some sense into her or somehow convince her to stop, think, ask for help, turn back time, or any of the other typical intense feelings that usually accompany these dreams. Instead, I just think, oh- she's here right now. It's OK. Make use of the time.

And the dream then took on that shiny, ringing, clear quality that I've come to associate with lucidity. I knew I was dreaming. I tried really hard to focus. It felt like an intense effort because I kept getting distracted by things and then redirecting my focus on H again.

We were sitting in the same side of a restaurant booth. It was noisy and dark all around us. H's hair was longer now, just above her shoulders and curly. She was leaned against the wall and I was facing her with my back to the aisle. I kept getting a creepy feeling on my back and I kept having fleeting thoughts that she would change at any minute. That she would become a zombie or that she'd start to look decayed. At any moment, I expected her brains to explode out of her skull, but then I remembered- no, it wasn't a gunshot. I looked at her arms, expecting to see them covered in blood, but then I thought- no it wasn't slit wrists either. I started to wonder what it was, how had she done it, and I could feel a memory deep down in me, of her drained of color on the couch, slumped over, of her mashing up pills in the kitchen, and then I pushed it away- I wasn't there, I didn't see that, here she is now, maybe it didn't happen. Disbelief is a powerful thing, and the horror of it all started rising up in me- it was real, I thought of H bloated and wet in the viewing, but I pushed the memory down, down, down. I had to focus on what was in front of me. It was like staving off panic. I wanted to run or shut my eyes and fall back into a deep sleep, but I really did latch ahold of some deep strength or trust down in me and ran with it. This was H, not a zombie, not a body, maybe a ghost. I had to go with it.

So I forced myself to look at her very carefully. This is the part I can't really describe because her face was very real. It was really like looking into her eyes, looking at her face, her smile. I kept saying, wow- I've missed your face. She laughed a lot. I put my hand on her face and asked if this was weird. She seemed very deep and serious at times, very patient, then she'd laugh. Meanwhile, I kept feeling the dream slipping away and it was really difficult to stay in it. I would try to think about what to say- it seemed there was something very important I needed to say- and the more I'd try to think about it, the more the dream would get away from me and so I had to keep refocusing on her face which was seriously vibrant and as real as if it weren't a dream at all.

I told her I loved her. I've done this every time I've dreamed about her, and this time it was very clear and we seemed to mostly be on the same page. She told me she loved me. She had not done that in any other dreams. At one point, I did ask her what the hell she had been thinking. I don't even think words exist to express the disbelief- I mean, there is a confusion that's unsettling. I just can't understand it. I need an explanation. Like if I can get the missing piece and put the puzzle together then I can undo it all. What was going through her mind? She looked away and seemed very distant and slightly annoyed- the way she was when she wanted to avoid a topic or deflect or when I was being tedious. I apologized. I told her that I was sorry for not having been a good friend lately, and I told her how I kept replaying all the signs I missed and that I was so sorry. She seemed resolved. She seemed to have deep regret too, but it was something that could be tapped into rather than something that was raging on the surface. It seemed like she was telling me to move on already, but I could tell it bothered her. It was the same response that she had the morning after she was arrested and I went in angry to confront her. Her response showed that she had already internalized how much she'd fucked up and that now what she needed was for everyone to let it alone.

Then it was her face again, so real. It was like a flashing series of her face - laughing when we were young, intense when we were having serious conversations, patiently irritated when I was being immature. Different hair styles and different ages- images of her flashing before me.

After that, we were sitting at a table now in the middle of the restaurant. I refocused my lucidity again and thought about how real it all felt. I could simultaneously feel myself in bed- I could feel the pressure of my eyelids. But here I was, everything as vivid and detailed as if I were awake, sitting at a table with H. We agreed that it was real. I asked her about what it was like being dead. These didn't seem like the right words though, because here she was, as real as can be. She started talking about some issue with some women in the place where she exists now. I couldn't really understand what she meant. Apparently they had some task that they had to carry out together. I asked if it was like heaven? It wasn't that exactly. She was less interested (or unable) in telling me exactly what it was like being dead and more interested in talking about this particular disagreement that she was having with some women who were also in this place/space/whatever. I thought to myself, this is typical of our conversations.

I fell asleep. I lost lucidity. It happened while trying to follow H's story.

I'm at my neighbor E's house. A small black dog has come up in her yard. The dog plays with my dog. I notice that it has a collar, and I call the owner. He says he lives upstairs- could I bring him the dog?

There is a stairwell leading up the pecan tree in my front yard, and at the top is the long gated corridor of an apartment complex. I push open the gate I see two shiba inus. They run to the edge of the platform and look down to the ground as if they are about to jump over back towards my yard. I stand very still and call them towards me, assuming that one of them is Saskia. But they come to me and I see that they are both strange shibas. Right as I scoop them up into my arms, the door at the end of the corridor opens and a shirtless middle aged thin smoking man comes out. He's wearing sunglasses and jeans and has the leathery skin of a man who's had too much sun. He calls the dogs- all three are his.

I'm riding in a car with E now. She's on the left and I'm on the right. The car is like a go-cart; we sit on top of it. I have the steering wheel but no brakes. I realize the brakes must be on her side, and I tell E to coordinate with me so that we can drive. She says we should switch sides. I ask her to grab the wheel. Just as I'm about to climb under her to switch over, I remember H.

I'm back in the restaurant. H is sitting at a different booth now. Across from her is a woman about our age. They are animated, discussing some drama involving people I don't know. They have their smart phones out and are texting someone about all this drama. She is still real, she is still vibrant, clear and healthy looking. But she's very engaged in the current moment. H was always very good at this, while I'm always spoiled the present by spending too much time in my own head or getting meta about every situation. Even now, I want to return to the question of what it is like being dead, what she was thinking when she did it, how she feels about it now. I want something deep and life changing to happen. She listens to me say these things, but she's clearly moved on to another conversation. I have no interest in the woman sitting across from her. H has always had a lot of friends. Some stay around for years, some come and go. Because I'm judgey or perhaps even snobby, I've never understood most of her friendships outside our own trio. They were mostly (not always, but most of them) transient and uninteresting- shallow relationships with uninteresting people based entirely on shared conditions / work places / drama. This isn't always true of course- some of her friends were amazing people. But in between all the really interesting and serious boyfriends and all the really deep and creative friendships were dozens of random and uninteresting short term affairs and third wheel women who I knew would not be in her life more than just a few weeks and therefore I never put out any effort towards getting to know them. To me, H had a brighter spark than the vast majority of the people in her life. And I looked at this woman, summed her up and dismissed her. Then I started to feel a little jealous that I had to share my time with H with another random person.

I thought all of that in a second and also hated myself for being such a bitch about it and for trying to make the moment about me. Clearly, H had given me a visitation, and here I was asking for more and continuing to misunderstand her. What I've learned since she died is how deeply she could live a moment. She lived in the present, and she was always willing to share other people's experiences in that same moment. And this is why her life was full of people everywhere she went. After she died, one of the things that was hard was recognizing this for the first time, feeling gratitude for having known her so well, and then immediately feeling regret and shame that I took it for granted when she was in my life. I'm too meta. I'm too judgemental. I don't experience the moment. And even as I was sitting there realizing this, I was thinking about all of this rather than joining in the moment with H and this other woman.

I sat back and shut up and listened to them talk. It became clear to me that they were talking about the same situation that H had tried to tell me about before. It was not something life-altering or deeply important. Just some issue in their daily life where-ever or whatever that is when you are dead. They were discussing what to do about different people. They were gossiping with some indignation about something that seemed rather petty to me, especially since the larger context involves the answer to what happens after you die and they seemed completley uninterested in discussing that at all as if it were a non-issue. And I realized that H was absolutely FINE. She was behaving in exactly the way she always had, handling everything the same way she always had, so she had adjusted and she was fine. This was H, living whatever this new life was, and being OK. It was a really peaceful feeling. She was totally wrapped up in the daily life of whatever situation she was in now, she had friends, I needed to stop trying to drag her out of that and back to the death and to my grief. It's not about me and it's not about the death. She knows I really did love her and would really do anything at all for her, and I got to tell her that. It was just something that happened in a moment- it doesn't change everything about her; we don't have to stay in that moment forever. Now she was moving on, and this conversation had nothing to do with me. She was gossiping and rolling her eyes about whatever it is that is happening in her life now. She is sharing a moment of indignation and friendship with this woman. I didn't need to barge in.

So I left.

Then the dream was flashing images again- mundane things including memories of times with H, but loads of things. The waterfall at Hamilton Pool. R before his hair turned grey. Washing dishes. Picking sticker burrs out of Lucy's feet. I could feel myself still in my bed, that eyelid pressure- and the images were overpowering. Someone says, "This is all there is. This is the way you go back home again." But I don't know what that means. When I think about going back home, I don't even know where that would be. Probably the words were just nonsense. The important thing was that I felt, really vividly and intensely, a desperation to continue being alive. I mean, a real desire to live. It is an almost tangible burning thing.

That was the end of the dream. The whole thing had taken place between snoozes on my alarm clock around 5 this morning. When I woke up, I didn't remember any of this for a few minutes, and then it all came flooding back to me when my husband asked if I'd had a nightmare. I had. I had forgotten. Earlier in the night- around 2 - I'd been sleeping on my side facing R with my back open to the bedroom. And I'd had a nightmare that a zombie or a ghost (the sort that has been haunting me since H died) was attacking my back- poking and tickling me and I couldn't move to stop it. I screamed, woke up, went to the bathroom, went back to sleep, forgot until R mentioned it. When he brought it up though, I remembered the feeling and then instantly remembered sitting in the booth with H staving off that panic- feeling that something was behind me but fighting to focus on staying in the dream with H. And then I remembered the rest of the dream that I just typed up.

- Trying to get into a college library at closing time, everyone was streaming out when I needed to get in. Going against the flow of people.
- Not knowing what to do.
- Being told to teach English instead of ICT.
- Searching around looking for something I could scavenge to make metal parts for musical instruments. Finding metal latices of metal cubes. Finding cupboards full of old metal gizmos, wondering if I could break them apart to use.

much transpired in this one. I was travelling the dream world meeting friends in various places, and I ended up in this resort of some sort with the dankertons. Me, Chris Geordie and Tyler were in one room, Arshia and Schwartz were somewhere else. There were beautiful girls around, and I was trying my best to get to know some of them. At one point a guy came by and we got in a brief rap battle and that seemed to impress them, but I knew I was about to share a room with 4 guys. Out of nowhere arshia comes and says that he and Schwartz are leaving early and their deluxe suite is open. Game on.

Sadly that dream ended quick due to noises in reality and I went back to sleep.

The next dream I was immediately flying through a canyon toward a massive landing area full of craft. I realized I was in a future where everything can fly - cars, boats, houses, you name it. Aurora and Kris were there talking about how to best choose a flying craft, and I hopped in a minivan and flew away. I landed at a house where Claire and some friends of hers were hanging out. Once I got here I sat at a table and started showing my beachman watch to Mustafah. I realized I'd shown it to him before, but he didn't remember as it had been in a dream. I thought that exact thought and did not reality check, oh well.

End of the dream I joined the actors in a scene that involved going in and out of that house, but not a single person had read the script beforehand and we had to guess what to do as to not piss off the director. That didn't work, so I just woke up instead.

I'm in the backseat of a car. There's a hot European guy that I know who is sitting in front on the right side of the car. He's driving, and I'm a little confused as to why he's driving from the right side. Maybe because he's from Europe? My mind goes over all the complications of driving a European-style car on American streets. There's a big, beefy guy sitting in front on the left side. I wonder if he's the bodyguard. When he shifts, I notice he also has a steering wheel on his side. Who's driving?

I woke up rather abruptly due to the sound of the cat throwing up. After cleaning up the mess, I checked the time and found that it was still way to early in the morning to be up. I went back to bed, trying to remember what I had been dreaming about before. I focused on the mental image of Hot European Guy as I drifted off.

I am on a ship (or maybe it a balcony on a cliff?), looking out over the railing. There is a long drop to the water below. The sea is a gorgeous shade of blue-green. There are all sorts of ships below me, and my eye is drawn to one that was half sailboat, half whale? The image starts fading and I know the false awakening is coming. I find myself in the kitchen of the house I just moved out of last week. Right away, I knew I could not really be there. I start heading for the door, though I find a bunch of rainbow-colored straws that are blocking my way. But I kept going, because I knew I'm not supposed to be there anymore. I make it out the door. At this point, I am almost awakened by the sound of a motorcycle revving outside. I focus on the dream imagery, and Hot European Guy appears on the street on a motorcycle. He tells me to hop on. I carefully climb on behind him, grabbing his hips with both hands and press my front against his back. I have a vague memory of the task of the year involving a dragon, and I will the motorcycle to turn into a dragon with Hot European Guy and I clinging to its back. He turns around and asks me what I want to do. I point to my old neighborhood and told him to burn it to the ground. I'm never coming back here.

I was awake. then closed my eyes and then I imagined that I am near the gate of on the subways in tehran <4rah'e Veliasr> Then My imagination became true (WILD) and I went to dream in there. Then It was lucid. I entered to Subway station and then after a while I was in a train station with 2 beautiful girls. I took their hand and I walked. then I looked my back. There was a witch that was chasing us. I afraid and flied with 2 girls and near there I descend in a farm land. I imagined that this land be my mind and start to grow increase some Mind Development Material in it.

after my first proper WBTB since months! i used SSILD for induction, also didnt used it like for months, i felt pretty confident to have a nice and long quality lucid

i am in a city and walk down the street. i tell someone? on the phone? about my diploma thesis. "the gathered results there where up to date at that time..." i have an awesome mood and keep on moving. an elevator left to me opens and i make a small jump to scare them a little and smile to them just because i feel so good.
just like that i get lucid and keep on moving some meters. i remember the basic task. i look around and everywhere are some people so i move back a little and found a girl with his boyfriend moving up some stairs. i decide to pull down her skirt and repeat it with her underpants. her boyfriend looks awkward down to the ground, she tells me "oh [my name]" like i would have told a bad joke and stands around. two guys that where next to us smile and look down on her bottom. since i knee anyways because i pulled her pants down i give it a short lick but i dont want to waste time with sexystuff because i have a lot more goals to check so i stand up and tell her to put up her pants again. before anyone react i already move away and see another girl with a dog? i approach her and knee before her for what reason i cant remember [i think i worried a little that the dream gets unstable so i grounded myself with a detail?]. i notice that i am still a little caveman and so i stand up and move on. i remember both advanced tasks and i decide to do the pokeball one. in waking i have incubated a little how i wanne approach this task and so i move straight to a guy and ask him/tell him i want to catch him into a pokeball but he dont have to worry i will let him out shortly after. [with this i wanted to make it feel easier because there will be no battle or resistance] he looks not that enthusiastic but since this is my dream he has no chance anyway. to summon the pokeball i look to him and say "ah and the pokeball is right behind me right" and i point without looking at a place behind me "but more on the right side?" he starts nodding. now i look to the point where i point at and see the pokeball. i smile because it works like a charm and pick up the ball. next to me is a girl or something? it feels like a witch [i hear harry potter audiobook at the moment] and i feel like she will prevent me from catching this guy. i push the button on the ball and throw it at the dude, the ball opens but it only bounce of him and nothing happens. damn it... i pick it up with TK and throw it at one of two ghost next to me [damn you harry potter xD] but the ball flows thru him. i pick it up with TK again and this time a guy approaches the scene and is next to the guy who i tried first. i throw the ball at him and he gets soaked in to the ball. i smile again and pick up the ball. i hold it in my hand and start moving around again. after some time i remember that part of the task is to let the guy out again and so i throw the ball. it opens the guy gets out and in same second the dream is fading.
i think i dont wake up but have a change in scenery where i lose lucidty.
i walk with a friend of mine in a mix of office and climbinghall. i see at the of the wall a climbing wall where a dude is belay a girl at the wall. i have the strong feeling of already knowing him and i already told him once that he is doing something wrong. my friend is laughing about him. he hears us and approaches us. i welcome him friendly and tell him that the thing he did was not smart. while telling this i suddenly have multiple ropes in my hand and i wrap them around my hands and start to swing a little. someone is pulling me backwards strongly and letting go so i swing to the ceiling on both sides. i do a backflip in the air and get lucid by that again.
"this is a dream again or still!" i move around and i see a office with some tables and people in suits. moving around i want instantly to phase thru a glassdoor but it wont work because in the last moment i feel insecure... i take a bowl per TK into my hand with some teabags. i move on and see a secretary i remember the bonus task and start moving and shaking my feet like it would be a earthquake. i say "wow do you feel this i think this is an earthquake" she looks up and agrees that this must be an earthquake but she seems not to bother. on the side of my visual field i see a window and outside some signs falling apart. i stop moving around like pretend because now i dont need to pretend anymore. i move to the window and for a short second hope that it wont get out of control and start to strong or end bad. i sit infront of the window and look around. shining Advertisement signs fall down and make some sparkles. i look at the street and see how it starts to crack up and to make a big hole. i feel satisfied to accomplish the bonus task so easy. the earthquake ends and i stand up and move over to the kitchencorner to make me some tea "hm i never drank any tea in a lucid" i think and expect a mug being in a wall cupboard. i open it up and find a mug with some water in it. i put it out pur our the water and start to boil me some water. since it need some time (doh..) i look around and think about meditate a little but the ground is wet so i imagine to know that next to me are some pillows and fair enough i look to my left and see two pillows. i them both up with TK and want to sit down as my roommate approaches me. i connect a bad feeling with him and think about to approach him and to resolve my waking life problem with him but the dream fades again and the scenery changes.
i loose lucidty and hear him telling me/a friend? that he just cant do it anymore. the music is too loud there are to many birds and he just cant sleep anymore. i sit somewhere outside and somehow feel like this is a dream and try TK on an item but it wont work because i feel insecure about my state. i move to a sign where some letters are pinned with magnets and i try to change them in something like Good bye but the letters are wrong and it wont work. i wake up for real

late to bed (2am), stress at work = vague dreaming

earlier:

+(f) talking about fishing with someone. "If I'm going to be doing nothing standing around for a long time, maybe I should then be fishing doing nothing?"

later:

+(f) in a house when a lot of dwarfs come home (from Lord of the Rings?) a lot of greeting and back-slapping going on

+outside, huddled along a fence, with wife(?), in a small enclosure opened against the fence, someone says he likes that place and is huddled down in a corner. I'm looking at tennis shoes, I select two, and they don't match.

Skyfalling
I was dreaming that I was in a room, like a plaster walled garage. Someone was showing me around with a couple others, there was this huge plastic great white shark in the room. I remember that the tail was all weird, like it hadn't been attached properly.. Next thing I remember is being on the border between atmosphere and space, extremely high in the sky as if I could see the whole earth.. There was another person with me, an enemy I think. It was somehow related to the shark room before. We were plummeting down to Earth, I was going to divebomb him or something. How did we even get this high?

Beach
I'm on the beach, there's been some sort of accident or phenomenon causing sea life to wash up on the shores. Sharks and jellyfish are being washed up by the waves, everyone is panicking and trying to put them back in the water... The sharks have weird teeth too, the teeth are all connected as if it were just one big serrated tooth. My family are there, bustling around like everyone else. I remember the sharks snapping at my feet, ungrateful bastards. I also remember a jellyfish jimmying around the shore which made me think it looked a little dopey.

Motor Cross
This dream was pretty enjoyable, I was on a motorbike driving on a circuit in a race. It was kind of dark and pouring with rain... The road was slippery as hell, cars and motorbikes were zooming around so fast. I was on a dirt bike, I remember thinking that if I wanted to win then I would have to up my game. I was behind by too much to take it easy, so I did some risky things. I start hugging the corners tighter, taking the turns at faster speeds, driving across dirt patches.. There were others taking similar risks too. I remember other motorbikes smashing brutally, taking the risks I was taking but not succeeding. It was scary, because I knew how close it was for me too.. It happened a few times, and eventually I slipped up. The crash was minor but my bike was too cracked to be of use anymore.

I had a dream about being with some chick. I remember trying to go to her house and stuff. My dad didn't want me with her but I went anyway. I remember trying to climb her fence. It was black and was in between two brick pillars. The bricks were red. On the bricks were green moss.


*dream skip*


I remember meeting Ellen degeneres and the girl I was with met Vanessa hudgens. At first I wasn't sure if I really saw Ellen but when I pointed it out to the girl I was with, my suspicions were confirmed.


*dream skip*


I'm in a school building. I walk back into the classroom with the chick I was with. Apparently the whole class is watching finding dory. Which probably explains why I met Ellen. Anyways, after I walk in the movie stops playing.


Everyone starts to nag and then the teacher asks me to use my Rasengan to get it playing again lmao.


At that moment I unknowingly took on the role of Naruto.


I got into the middle of the room and attempted my Rasengan several times but it didn't actually work. I'm assuming its because I wasn't lucid and its obviously a lot harder to manipulate stuff in dreams when you don't know you are actually dreaming.

I had a dream that I was sitting on the bed in my parents room. The house looked quite empty. The sun was shinning in through the blinds and curtains from their window. I was holding my baby sister on the bed. Her eyes looked weird, sort of monster bug eyed like. I noticed that and then thought "am i dreaming?" And did a nose reality check.


I could breath. At that moment, everything changed. Sort of like I got a new clarity on everything by going through a new demension or something. Like a "holy shit moment"


I instantly fell to the floor, i believe it was an accident though and I then said "I want to go to the beach!"


That didn't happen at first and the dream started to fade. Sort of like , idk its hard to explain. But I'm 100% sure it was from my excitement I had from being caught off guard like that with a lucid.


So I then realized I had to stabilize quickly and I started to rub my hands on the floor. Good thing I actually did fall onto the floor accidentally or I probably would have woken up!


Anyways. The dream started coming back to me. From that moment on I had no idea what the fuck happened to my baby sister, didn't even think about her. Its like she disappeared as soon as I became lucid haha.


Anyways. This lucid is weird because my original lucid goal was to go skydiving and what not. But this lucid sort of caught me off guard. I didn't think I'd get lucid so quickly after only 3 days of doing reality checks so my first instinct was to go to the beach.




Anyways. I get up off the floor in my parents room and make my way to the living room by first walking out of my parents room and into the hall way.
As soon as I enter the hallway, a super bright light filled my vision. The living room door was cracked open and the light was shinning through. It was extrmemly vivid. It reminded me of what some would call "The light at the end of the tunnel" as if when I walked through, I'd enter heaven.


As I walk through the hall I started thinking about something I was worried about most during waking life, happening in my lucids. Negative things manifesting from simply thinking about them. I was worrying about if my dad would appear out of no where and try to rape me or something just from simply thinking about it. He didn't. Thankfully.




Anyways. I continue walking and affirm my attention to go to the beach. As I make my way further through the hallway, my entire head starts to feel heavy ass fuck like I had a boulder on my head. I kept tipping over backwards and towards the wall, trying my best to hold on to stuff. At that moment I had a 'Aha moment' and thought


"This is what hukif was talking about!"


That sensation went away after a bit and I made my way to my living room door in one piece thankfully. Boy I didn't know how much work it'd be navigating the dream world!


I walk through the living room door that had light shinning through the cracks, an am now suddenly on the beach!


The beach was empty as fuck though. Like 4 people on the entire beach.


I then said "Populate now!" Like I was god or some shit and the whole beach filled up with people and hot babes. At that moment, I learned another lesson in the dream world. I learned that it really does take strong intention for things to happen, and that its unlikely for something to appear from simply thinking about it without putting emotion behind it and strong intention.




From this moment on things got a little crazy.


There were hot chicks walking around in bathing suits and crazy ass loud music was playing.


My first instinct was to take the first bubble butt chick I saw, into the water and fuck her.


I found the girl. She was Caucasian. I lead her out into the middle of the water and she sat down on me. We got busy. It felt amazing.


At this point on. I believe I started to lose lucidity sadly. Because I could still feel her fucking me, but I also started getting visions of other chicks riding dildos and stuff on the beach.


The fact that I had a girl fucking me, on top of watching tons of other girls riding dildos was a complete sensory overload.


I woke up in waking life, attempting to make my way to the bathroom before it was too late.




*note: like I said. I had no idea I'd be getting lucid out of the blue like this. So it kind of caught me off guard the fact that I could breathe through my nose. And I sort of did what came most natural to me. This lucid happened after having an extremely vivid dream about meeting Ellen Degeneres and Vanessa his Hudgens lmao.

On top of all that, I learned several things during my very first "real" lucid:

-I learned what it looks like to have the dream start to fade
-What hukif means about feeling a heaviness in dreams
-How its like to translocate
-How much intention you really need in order to change parts of the dream
-What it feels like to fuck a chick

Airport
I remember it was night and me, my friend Lajja and some other guy were hanging out. I had flown to Wellington in order to hang out with her, we were all going to fly back to Auckland tomorrow.
I woke up in the morning and there was some issue with the flight, like Lajja had forgotten to book her tickets or we missed the plane. We have to go and get new tickets, I'm not really stressed about any of this though. We're in the waiting room which is split in two by a set of folding shutter doors. I sit in the second room while everyone else sits in the first room. I think I did it because it was quieter? The air hostess comes to tell the next few people to proceed, this happens a couple times but not once does she alert the 2nd room. I'm aware she's not doing this, the first time it happens I opened up the shutter doors a bit so she wouldn't ignore it. The 2nd time she still ignores it, so I pull the doors open all the way... The 3rd time she does it again, fucks sake. I just get up and head out instead of waiting, telling myself to just go ahead since Lajja and the other guy went with the hostess the 3rd time. I see them down on the floor below, connected to my floor by a set of escalators. Lajja and the guy are holding hands for some reason, I find this weird since they're not dating and Lajja has a boyfriend already. I head down to meet them and ask if they got the tickets, the guy says "Oh yeh, but uhh whoops I forgot yours, sorry mate". I instantly pick up that he did it on purpose, he's trying to sit alone with Lajja on the plane. I have to go buy my own ticket now.

Plane
I'm on board of a plane, it's a sort of continuation from the last dream (though I definitely recall waking up between them). The plane is quite small with 1 or 2 seats on either side of the walkway. My dad is on the plane next to me or in front of me, we're talking and I briefly look away from him mid-conversation. When I look back at him it's my mum instead. What the...? I'm a bit confused, wasn't I just talking to my dad? Or maybe it was my mum.. Everything feels real, I decide that 'maybe' it's a dream (although I don't even feel like it is). I do a reality check and it succeeds much to my surprise. I stand up and try to stabilise, recalling some advice about making the most of lucids by maximising lucidity and awareness. My mind is a bit chaotic though... I try to force the lucidity to the max and it sort of works but the dream isn't very stable. I can tell because it was bright at first and the world was gradually getting darker and darker. I'm in my flat room now, kind of feels like everything is spinning. I try to escape the room, thinking that maybe moving and engaging the dream will help extend it. I fly out through the window but end up awake. Crap. I do a reality check and succeed, I guess I just had a false awakening. I'm in my bed, I clamber out of it and I'm wearing heaps of clothes which are a bit restricting, it's quite dark and getting darker... I wake up for real.

It was a hard night, nothing recalled.

Waited too long to write these down. My dreams this night stood out by how relatively happy and peaceful they were. In the first one, my entire family was still together (I live alone now, dad and mom divorced) like in the old days.

Of the second one I only remember my dad muttering orders to an imaginary army, and me pointing out how absurd this is. There was much more, all forgotten.