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I did recall a lot more dreams but they faded fast... Should I jot notes again? My life is too busy for that.

Jamie 1

Was dosing off. Saw her looking and me from the shadows. I saw her face and the outline of her amazing hair. She didn't seem to happy or anything just neutral.

Jamie 2

Can't remember what i was doing in the dream. Jamie was there but she was in her distant phases and vanished from the dream.

Lucid

I was with Victoria (The younger one) from work. We were by the lethbridge Hospital at night. We went across the street to the building where they hold AA meetings. There was a hidden door or something and we went into some hidden rooms. I knew this was impossible so i became Lucid. Victoria vanished somewhere. I wasn't interested in her. I wanted to look for jamie. I found myself at a window and then I was outside. I was thinking of how to find Jamie when everything started going black.

I better get back into stabilizing dreams and doing Time Dilation again. i'm surprised i"ve been lucid shortly every week with my method of wbtb.

Lucid dreaming can be fickle, y'know. All I do is a WBTB, I just focus on going back to sleep because I had work to get up for. I wasn't even trying to lucid dream. Some time passes and I sort of "load" into the dream like a game or turning up the brightness on a monitor. I mean one moment, I am visualizing myself looking into the mirror, I get the feeling that I can focus on it more, then the dream fully loads around me. I am not going to wonder what technique that was.

BUT the BIG BIG thing here for the first time in a loooong time - maybe ever, I stabilized the dream past 30 seconds. What I did this time around was focus on the details on the back of my hands. The feeling of walking on the ground. The feeling of the clothes on my body. Sounds. Anything. I tried very hardest not to do any thinking inside the dream. I went searching around for a dream guide. I knock on a door. No answer. I knock on a window and I guess a woman who was the mother told me they were at school. So I spend the rest of the dream wandering around my neighborhood for about 10 minutes.

15th November 2020

Fragment:

A vast and somewhat empty place apart from some abstract platforms as I recall. There was a "sky" made up of pastel colours, light oranges, pinks and blues.

There was a demon queen, or something. She looked mostly humanoid and had purple skin? She wore some ornaments or accessories like gold bangles and chains but apart from that she must have been almost naked. She was bigger than me but not a lot bigger. Thought I suspected so, I asked her midway through some conversation if we were in an alternate dimension, to which she answered yes.

The demon queen and I were on one side of... a table? Not sure. And opposite from us were two other people, maybe a couple. The queen was able to alter or modify certain traits with some species like humans and elves, but not dwarves. But these two other people looked human even though one was supposedly an elf and the other a dwarf. So I asked her, what if they have a child together, could that child be altered in the same ways?

(recall gap)

Vague recall of an office-like place, either from the inside or the outside.

---

Notes:

- My last journaled dream featured mystical aspects like demons, but the setting and context were entirely different. The theme here was of a more medieval/fantastic aspect, by comparison.

- Unfortunately, I couldn't retain recall very well with this dream so I've completely lost any details that would be left of the other characters and the dream location.

- The demon queen as a dream character had some aspects relating to my own personal interests in transmutation and transformation. The purple skin may have seemed random when I first recorded the dream but in retrospect that element is present in some characters I've created and is a colour I generally like, although her skin's hue was a bit brighter/lighter.
-- "Queen" was an implied intuitive feeling about the character, not something that was mentioned or explained literally.

- There was a feel of "sunset" to this dream and there were no changes in light while in the platform dimension.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening / astral projection


We moved to an apartment in Alverca. The house is nice and big, but we look through the window and I only see other buildings right in front. I recall we moved here so to be closer to mom. She is seeing the house for the 1st time and she is impressed by the size of the rooms. She lays on the couch in the living room and says that's what she'll be doing on weekends when she comes by, but I notice she is sad and so am I. More than sad, I feel depressed and oppressed, remembering the beautiful green landscape we no longer have around. I miss it so much and think we made a mistake.

Travel back in time with a couple friends, kind of accidental. We find ourselves in USA around the 1900s, I think in Washington. We end up in the house of a lady and her daughter who have some kind of family factory they inherited and are trying to get back to work, having to fight back all the discrimination against independent working women. They are determined to make it work and we help them. Right now they have men reconstructing their old mansion and its quite chaotic. I go for a walk with one of my friends and we pass by historical buildings like the Senate and I ask her "Doesn't this feel like you real life now? Don't you feel at home here?" And she says "no", looking surprised. I explain that I enjoy so much this slow paced world and she says she misses the internet. I laugh and agree, that's the only thing that really is hard not to have. But we agree we don't miss tv or any of other technological advances. She still says she wouldn't want to stay. I say I would and I imagine I'd use it to try to change so many things. I see myself writing books to influence the mentality of people in the future.

I'm outside with Elin from the ensemble. We talk and it feels really good to be with her. She tells me that she has to leave me. I follow her to a tree and she tells me she lives there. She has to sleep in the tree almost the whole day. I don't want to leave her. There is a small hole in the tree that at first doesn't seem to fit for her. She enters the hole and I give her a saw. She seems sad to leave me too. I ask her if there is a time I can come to visit her each day so we can spend time together. We discuss some really bad times when I have school and in the middle of the night. I think it would be best if we meet in the morning. Recall gap. At some point I try to save her from evil men with guns.

Notes: I always thought Elin was cool. I haven't seen her in a long time.

I'm with the missionaries in church.

Notes: I have seen the missionaries a lot in the past weeks.

I'm just about to do a RC and suddenly I'm in my bed stretching out my hand in order to pinch my nose.

Notes: I'm not sure if I actually did the RC when I woke up. It might have been a FA.

Agent
Night of November 11, 2020

We had rushed inside one of the houses at the end of the road. It took a while to get our bearings. By the air of conversation coming from one of the rooms on the back, I could tell the owners were unaware of our presence. B stood behind me while I looked back on the door; I opened it ever so slightly until it allowed a small peek through to the other side. Below the thickness of light were vehicles among the rest of homes that lined both sides of the street. My eyes panned side to side; not a single soul stood out in the close vicinity, and that was concerning. They were nowhere to be found.

And then, by mere chance I caught the shadowy figure of a man. He emerged from a corner between the third and fourth houses to the left of the street, and soon after followed not one but five more men. Their sleeveless and greasy shirts were disgustingly magnified by the ammo belts running across their chest. One of them, the closest to the entrance, raised his weapon in victory as he kicked the door from its hinges. The crew forced their way through the threshold while I looked back in horror. With my back against the exit I shut the door close. I could barely think straight; B hadn’t moved an inch.

"They're coming," I said.

B trailed after me as we moved to the back of the house where we found a group of three women sitting around a table.

“We need to move out of this house.” I warned them.

“They’re going to be here any minute now and if they find us, we’re done.”

But the three women ignored me and continued their conversation without a care in the world. As a matter of fact, I don’t think they even heard me. I signaled B and we hurried out of the place through one of the windows. We walked for a while and it wasn’t long when we came upon a stretch of land. An assembly of bodies in black suits covered the space wide. I don’t know why I looked back. The three women's residence was a two-story structure that housed a large balcony overlooking the field. Up on the platform my eyes locked with one of the mercenaries. I diverted my gaze immediately and pulled us both near the crowd of people. But it was too late now. As if taken from one of the Matrix movies, I saw two agents drop to the ground. We had been found.

I turned back only to determine the distance between us as we ran for our lives. The agents chased us to a building which I barely recognized (after waking up) as my old middle school. The old place had a layout consisting of four floors of interconnecting corridors organized in a rectangular pattern. I had taken B up and down countless sets of stairs, through narrow passages and broken-down classrooms. But no matter how much I tried we couldn’t lose them. Eventually, our haphazard escape meant it was only a matter of time before one of us lost sight of the other.

Alone and terrified I ran as fast as I could. Before reaching the end of the hall, I found a short space on the lower left wall near one of many locked doors. I shoved myself into the crammed space and crept my way inside into an abandoned classroom. Within the darkness I barricaded myself with pieces of decayed old wooden chairs, broken tables, and any other mess I could find. I crouched behind the dusty window of the door and awaited in silence. The close stomps from one of the agents could be heard from barely a few feet away. The sound of footsteps came from the right; they stopped directly in front of me, then resumed on the other side, dying out the further they went. Slowly, I raised my head from the ground. We were already deep into the night. The dirty window made it almost impossible to see but, there was no mistake that the quivering figure standing on the third floor, on the other side of the school, was none other than B himself, taken into custody by one of the agents.

I had to go back for my friend. I retreaded slowly away from the door, and then I realized the back of the room had opened itself to a parking space abutting a roadside hotel. The place had a set of stairs to one of the upper floors. The sounds approaching from the neighboring guest rooms startled me, so I took cover, crouching behind the wall at the bottom of the steps. A young man crossed from side to side not before stopping midway after noticing me. He shared a puzzling look. Realizing the awkwardness of the situation I stood up almost immediately and played things off as if nothing had happened. The young man continued, and I followed him up as he turned the corner on the left and entered through the doors to the public restroom. As I did, it became clear to me that this was all a dream.

The place I was in wasn’t anything special, save for a very distinctive feature. I discovered it by watching the young man from before, the moment he sat on the floor in front of a mirror above one of the sinks. Without any interaction on his part, the mirror turned itself on like any other T.V. I was surprised at what unfolded in front of me. But before I did anything else, I had to ground my lucidity inside the dream.

“Where is my body?” I asked.

“My body is lying in bed. I am dreaming.”

“What date is it?”

“It is the 11th of November.”

With renewed clarity, I approached one of the mirrors. As I grabbed it, the object twisted and shrank to a size perfectly fitted to my grip. Like a tablet, I held the mirror and stared at it. Nothing out of the ordinary happened; my reflection looked perfectly back at me. The young man watching T.V. was still there, withdrawn from anything or anyone around him. I didn’t know what to do with this thing. But then, an idea popped inside my head. Could I use an object like this, especially a mirror, to look into another space in the world, maybe use it as a medium of transportation? Say I want to travel to a different location, perhaps the mirror could facilitate a much needing proposition. But how do I get this thing to work?

First, I would need to think of the place I wanted to see. I initially thought about the old school, but at this point lucidity was slipping away and it was hard for me to keep a concentrating effort on the task at hand. The old school brought memories of my friend B, and with a little effort I thought I could use the mirror to look back to where exactly he was being held prisoner. The distance wasn’t long, and maybe I could get back to him by use of the object in the span of an instant. I regained a little awareness after this and attempted my escape. However, whatever I tried, I could not get past my own reflection in the mirror. I thought directly on where I wanted to go, tried to imagine the place I had been previously; I even turned away for a second, then looked back, hoping to see something other than my face behind the small piece of glass, but I failed time and again. It’s as if I didn’t actually believe such a thing possible. Absurd. This was a dream. Impossible had no meaning within the confines of my own mind. And yet, doubt was a hurdle difficult to eradicate. But my mind wasn’t having it no more. Confusion formed inside a cloud that blurred my judgement, disconnecting my mind and sliding me away into the mindset of non-lucid.

The dream continues non-lucidly.



Dipping One's Toes at Dream Control: My First Attempts
Night of November 12, 2020

I stopped before the stairs of my house, observant of whatever was downstairs. I did not know why, but something about the place was amiss. Things felt wrong; it all felt slightly off. And then, it hit me: It is a dream.

I repeated the words, and each time I did, I could feel the cogs inside my head starting to turn. I saw more clearly now, aware of what was happening. Downstairs, danger was imminent. I wanted to get out of here, but I didn’t know how. I thought I’d wish a new place into existence, but the dream would not budge. I tried talking my way through things, but again, it mattered little to none if I didn’t believe myself to make it happen. I stayed for several more attempts until I finally woke up.