lucid

non dream - lucid - non lucid

I wake up from a non-lucid dream in the middle of the night, but I do not automatically open my eyes.
I remember this is a good thing, but it takes me a few seconds to recall why I actually want to keep them closed.
I'm happy that I managed to keep my eyes closed, though I have no idea how I managed to do so.

I try to gently move a finger; it doesn't work.
Great! I try to enter a dream, thinking about Yuya and Teraluna.
I try to recall the unique smell and the humidity of the refreshing air.
At one point I realize I have entered a dream and open my eyes.

I'm standing on one of the bridges of Teraluna, facing Yuya's place.
I try not to get too excited, but it's hard to control my emotions.
It's daytime, the city is alive and active.
I start walking towards Yuya's place, trying to focus on each of my senses to make the dream as stable as possible.

As I reach the house I'm slightly confused as I want to knock on a door, but there is none.
The house is missing outer walls.
I do not want to intrude, and I do not want to yell to ask her if she's there.
Suddenly I realize that I'm an idiot, we communicate telepathically all the time.
I search for her aura, find it in the house and project a thought onto her.
She comes running out of the house and jumps at me giving me a big hug.

"Hyuuu"

"Hi Yuya!"

She's smiling the way she always does, I don't know any people who are able to express their happiness the way she does.

"What do you want to do tonight?"

That is a good question, I have hundreds of ideas, thousands of questions, but I don't know what to say.
I think about WakingNomad's DJ. I want to go to visit unknown places, experience things I have never experienced before.

"I can take you anywhere you want. But first you must remember something important!"

"What is it?"

"You need to remember how to fight!"
"Riven is safe, but if we visit other places, it's possible that we will be attacked."

(I don't remember what happened in between)


We're standing on a stone foundation in the middle of a sea.
The stone foundation is basically a big circle, probably 30 meters in diameter.
It's a few millimeters below the water surface, so it's actually covered by a tiny bit of water.
There's nothing around it, so if you step over the edge you'll just fall into the sea.

Yuya explains that I should reinforce a small layer of energy around my skin to protect myself from any hits.
She also says that we're not going to use any energy based attacks so that we don't hurt each other.
We're standing in the middle of this circle, face to face, ready to fight.
I'm excited. I know that I have fought in dreams before.
I feel safe, like I'm more powerful than she is, I'm confident...

But wrongly so. I am startled as I notice Yuya is holding my throat.
We were a few meters apart but she got to me within just a split second, I could barely even see it.

"Focus!"
"You can't afford to think about your waking life while you're in a battle."

This makes sense. I get back into a combat ready position, and try to completely focus on her and her movement.
She comes at me again, she is extremely fast, I can't keep track of her with my eyes.
However this time my body instinctively reacts, and I manage to block a series of hits.

"Good, you remember a few things"

But I didn't. My body reacted by itself.
Of course! I know it from playing guitar: Muscle memory!
That must be it! Of course my body will remember how to fight if I have done it before.

"Focus!"

"Sorry"

"Try to remember, just because you can't attack me with energy doesn't mean you're not allowed to make use of it"

What does she mean?
She attacks me again, I can just barely block her attack.
And then I realized what she meant.
I can tell where she is by locating her aura, even if she is light years away, so why wouldn't it work if she's this close?
Trying to feel her presence more clearly I start to see her aura, and the energy flowing through her body.
It's a thin net of fluorescent strings, a bit like the veins in our body, except pure energy flows through them.

She attacks yet again, this time I can see her much more clearly, and time feels slower.
I manage not only to dodge her attack, I even attempt a counterattack though she easily blocks it.

"Good!"

I think I finally understand. I can just tell my body to do something without going into the specifics.
If I play an F cord on the guitar I don't think about finger positioning, I just tell my left hand so grab an F cord, and muscle memory takes care of the rest.

I decide to attack this time. As I do this, I instinctively enlarge the area covered by my own energy so it reaches her.
I notice that this way I'm even more aware of her movements, and time slows down even more.
We fight at an absolutely ridiculous speed, but I manage to keep up, and with each hit I get a better understanding of how to use my body.
I'm absolutely fascinated, and don't think about waking life at all.
This goes on for a few minutes. Water is splashing up with every step we take.
We're not really exhausted but at one point we stop.
It's only then that I remember my goals from waking life, and that I wanted to ask her more questions.
I also notice that the dream seems to loose vividness, am I going to wake up soon?

"So... longer than I think?" (I refer to what she said last time we talked)
She smiles, but doesn't say anything. It doesn't feel like she's avoiding the topic though so I ask her more clearly:
"I can't remember, when have we actually met for the first time?"
This time it does feel that she's not entirely comfortable answering the question.

"A long time ago... a very long time ago, it's normal that you cannot remember"

I get a feeling that last time, she hinted at me knowing her for longer than I have actually lived.
I'm not sure if I should ask even more, I don't want to make her uncomfortable.

"I cannot answer that question clearly."
"We live in different worlds, time is relative"

She thinks about how to phrase her next sentence.
I want to tell her that she doesn't need to tell me, but she feels my urge to know.

"We have met in your dreams when you were a child... but... we have met before that... before you were born."

"In another world?"

"Yes. You can't remember, that's the way it works."

"Hey, don't worry, I'm happy to be here, what matters is the present, not the past right?"
There's that beautiful smile again. She's relieved.
It's not like she wants to hide anything, I can feel that. It's just uncomfortable for her, because regardless of what she does, I won't be able to remember.

"I can show you one day, if you want to."
"Next time, I'll take you on an adventure, what do you say?"

"Awesome!"

(I think we talked some more but I can't remember)

The dream fades away.

1/14/11

1-The Storm
I arrive at school, black clouds swirling in the sky. I'd best get inside; tornadoes are already starting to form, and I know I can't fight them like I do in my dreams. ((Uh... Reality check??? Idiot.)) Once inside, we are all ushered to the gym for some sort of ceremony. Incidentally, I am sitting next to Mitchell. This is somewhat of a problem: I can sense he is beginning to fall for me, and I have no feelings for him whatsoever. In fact, I find him quite bothersome. But here, I face a conflict of personality.

My inhibited side wants to make it clear that I am not interested. However, a manipulative part of me wants to be with him to stir up trouble. After all, Shelby was obsessed with him for two years. I could just picture her reaction if I actually went out with him! The thought makes me giggle, and Mitchell looks at me with amusement. "What's so funny?"

"Uh, nothing." Idiot. I can't just use a person like that for my own crazy thrills. It's not ethical. Just because I have a thing for drama doesn't mean everyone else should suffer because of it.

I continue arguing with myself until the ceremony is over. For some reason Mitchell is leaving early, and he wants me to help him carry some stuff to his car. Oh, great... 'If he asks me out, I'd better say no,' I warn myself fiercely. Oh, come on, another part of me says, Don't you think it'd be a LITTLE fun to toy with him? 'No! Well, yes, but that's beside the point!'

At Mitchell's car, I hand him his things and glance up at the dark sky. "I have a feeling we won't be having school tomorrow," I say. He nods, seeming distracted, and looks at me hesitantly. Oh no, it's even worse than I thought. He's thinking about kissing me!

Some of my panic must have shown through, because he instead leans in closer and hugs me. "Goodbye," he says softly.

"Uh, goodbye," I mutter, unable to stop myself from hugging him back. Damn. I'm going to murder Evil Me one of these days...

He gets into his car and drives off, while I head back to the school. I feel dizzy, and my heart is beating out of control. "See what you're doing?" I mutter to myself. "Getting these stupid teenage hormones all out of whack. Something is seriously wrong with you." As soon as I walk in the door, I am met by a very unpleasant senior. I recognize her instantly as one of the newspaper staff. ((IRL, my school doesn't have a newspaper.)) I realize that she saw me with Mitchell, which is one of the worst possible things that could happen. ((According to the dream, there had been some sort of incident surrounding Mitchell lately, making him somewhat of a "celebrity."))

"You're going out with Mitchell?" she asks excitedly, notepad in hand. "How long have you known each other? What is your name?"

"It isn't like that," I say evasively, and run away from her. News travels quickly, though, and I am hounded by student reporters the whole rest of the day. Evil Me loves it. Shy Me wishes they would go away.

Finally the day ends, and my mood is as dark as the raging storm outside. It doesn't help matters any when my friends drag me along to help some girl with her boyfriend problems and end up making me miss the bus. They offer to drive me home; I have no option but to except. My mood improves drastically when I realize that this is all a dream.

Instead of ending up at my house, we are forced to stop at this creepy old mansion. Everything about it screams haunted: there are ghostly wails, eerie and unexplainable creaks, flickering lights... "My subconscious is so cliche," I say with amusement. ((I am lucid for a while, but I don't remember the rest of it.))

2- Important Insights
People have been collapsing lately and becoming completely catatonic. A girl falls down in front of me; I catch her before she hits the ground, then sit down and hold her against me as she has a violent seizure. I learn that she has a boyfriend named Zachary, so I use that to try to get her to come out of this. "Come on," I say, "You have to fight this. Zachary would be devastated if he never got to speak to you again." I continue saying things like this until she miraculously comes back to consciousness.

Later, I am working at some weird experimental facility dealing with the spiritual insights of dogs. At first, my job is to chase the dogs down as they run on their delirious quest to reach an insight. Then I get a promotion to counselor.

"This is your choice," I say to the dog in my hand, just as I'd heard my superiors say not long before. "No one else can decide this for you. If you chose to stay here, everything will return to the way it was. If you decide to go out there, you'll have an amazing spiritual awakening and come to an important insight. Just know that once you choose, there's no turning back. What is your decision?"

"I choose to go out," the dog says. As soon as he steps outside, his eyes turns dazed and he runs around frantically for several minutes, before finally coming to a halt and reaching his insight, which one of the Chasers promptly records.

My superior tells me to wrap it up for today. "I'll be finished after this last dog," I tell her, and give the dog my speech. All the chasers have gone home for the day, so I take this task as well. I follow the dog on his crazed run; for some reason I am running on all fours as well. I feel fast and free! I should run like this all the time!

Finally the dog stops, and looks enlightened. "What is your insight?" I pant.

"That dogs and people are really not that different, and can live in harmony together."

Note: For the past several nights I haven't been able to remember a single dream, and until the last section of last night, I thought I was going to have yet another night where I couldn't remember anything. It was during the last hour or so of my sleep that I started having a dream, and my alarm woke me during the dream, so I was able to remember it. Then it got a bit strange, I will explain it as I post the dream here.

My mother and I are at a train station, looking around to see what is happening. I see one of the trains waiting at the station, though there aren't very many people around, so it is virtually empty. I think it would be fun to take a train ride, but I figure the trains probably cost too much to ride. But when I look, the trains are running for free, so there is no reason why we can't take one and see the sights for a bit. So my mom and I climb onto one of the trains and we wait there, it is a two level train, so we choose seats on the top. More people get on board, and finally it pulls out of the station. From Tucson, the train heads south. The desert looks greener than I have seen it for a long time since there has been a drought going on in the desert for a while. It is really pretty out there. So we just ride along and enjoy the ride until we reach another train station. My mother says it's time to head back to Tucson, so we get off of the train and board a train that is leaving in the opposite direction. Shortly after departure, however, this train turns off to the right, heading east. So we ride the train for a while longer, over a couple bridges, and finally to another station. So once again, we get off the train, but this time we check a couple of maps and find the train that is heading back to Tucson. To be honest, I'm getting a bit bored riding on trains, so I'm ready to head back.

This is also a double level train, but the lower level is actually enclosed. There is a celebration there, I look over and see it is a wedding… or it looks sort of like one. There is a woman in a wedding dress, and another woman in a skimpy bikini, but the two of them are standing in front of an official looking man, saying wedding vows to each other. I take a piece of the cake and eat it, it is delicious, though it isn't chocolate… I then go upstairs onto the open air deck to take a look around. I go to one end of the train where I can see the engineer down below me, or I can see where the engineer is supposed to be… there's no one there now. I look ahead and see smoke and fire, so much fire… and we're heading right for it! I go back downstairs and find the engineer is at the party, so I tell him what is going on, and he goes straight back to his place and sees what I saw. The fire is spreading towards us, so the engineer stops the train and starts backing up. We are backing up into water, which seems strange to me. Everyone goes to the top level of the train to keep from getting drowned inside, but we are still sinking. The engineer says the train will make it, but if not, jump in and swim for it. I am standing on one of the seats, my HP Palmtop computer is in one pocket, my cell phone in my other pocket… I know they would not be happy to get wet. The fact I haven't used my HP palmtop for several years since it became seriously outdated doesn't occur to me, that now I use an iPod Touch… but it does occur to me that the desert is so flooded, and it's not even the monsoon season. So I do a RC and find I'm dreaming.

Now that I'm lucid, I fly into the air to go check out the fire a bit closer. I am checking to see if there is any easy way to go around it so my mom and I can get home. It's not a brush fire like I'd first thought… well, actually much of it is a brush fire, but a large portion of the south side of Tucson is also on fire. There is a track that goes around Tucson to the east, it circumvents the burning areas. Then I ask myself why I need to get the train home, it is a dream, after all. But I decide to follow the story a bit farther, I have the feeling I don't have much longer left to sleep, so trying to complete one of my goals would be pointless. So I fly back to the train and tell the engineer what I saw, as well as telling the other people in the train. The engineer switches tracks at one of the track switches, and we get on a track heading east. I am looking at the fire off to my left when my alarm wakes me up.

So I wake up, and as is my habit, I reach up and hit the snooze button… then I drift off back into the dream again. I do this fast enough that I don't lose lucidity, I'm not sure if this counts as a DEILD, but it was definitely a continuation of the previous dream. The train is being attacked now, it is stopped. Some of the people are trying to escape, running away from the train even though the rest of them are telling those who are running to stay with the train. I see some other people out there waiting for the runners with guns, are they going to shoot them? The guns turn out to be hand held flame throwers, the people waiting for the runners set the first ones on fire. The burning ones run around in circles screaming, the others try to return to the train, but it is too late. The people with flamethrowers seem to find it very entertaining to watch their victims burn alive. They continue approaching the train, and I finally remind myself that I am dreaming and can stop them. They like fire so much, let's let them have some! I use Damage Inc. to send fireballs at them, the fireballs blast some of them and set others on fire, and the remaining ones retreat. I go into the train, and I see my mother staring at me, she asks where I learned to do that, I tell her I can always do that in a dream… and then my alarm goes off because the snooze period is done.

I hit the snooze button again, and slip right back into the dream. Everyone is saying that stopping those attackers now won't help as long as there are more of them out there, they will just try again, and this time with more of them… or they will try a sneakier approach. I tell them I'll just have to follow those who retreated back to their base of operations and take them out there. The people tell me not to leave, they will be defenseless in the train. I tell them I have to go stop the attackers, they're burning everything! So we compromise, we start working on the train, reinforcing the walls to keep attacks out, sealing parts of it off to keep fire out… and then someone got in contact with several large rock golems, these golems stand about twice the height of the train, and they are marching alongside it. Well they should be immune to burning… The work on the train is taking too long, I know my ten minutes might be almost up, and sure enough, my alarm goes off and wakes me.

Ok, so again with the snooze button… the dream was quite interesting, and I wanted to go back. I am back on the train, but I leave right away, heading in the directions the enemies had retreated. I haven't gone far when I see there is an island in the sky, and on that island is a city. I fly up to the island and I see more of the people who tried to set the train on fire, and they were surely the ones who set Tucson on fire. The island is flying low, and there are people with some kind of long range flamethrowers on the front of it… or maybe they're lasers that are starting fires. Looking down in front of the island I see everyone running… quite a few people, dogs, cats, deer, coyotes, rabbits, bobcats, and other assorted animals, all of them mixed together as if they weren't aware they were supposed to be afraid of each other. There are people there shooting the fire, they are setting the stragglers on fire and laughing as their targets burn to death. I go down and use a blast of icy air to extinguish their latest targets which included a woman, a kid looking to be about seven years old, a pair of javalinas, and a coyote. I heal them and then head back to the island, where the people there are staring at me. I am pissed off at their sadistic behavior, I tell them if they like burning so much, they would be the ones to burn. I use Damage, Inc. to start a fire that encircles the entire city, preventing escape. The fire spreads rapidly inwards, I get the feeling there are some in there that can be saved… so I fly into the city and use telekinesis to lift them out of the path of the fire. There aren't many of them… I check, but these people don't seem to believe in pets… so all that is left in the city are a bunch of assholes. I set the people I have pulled out onto the ground, using a healing spell on them just before I wake up again. This time I get up.

I had a slew of dreams last night but don't remember a lot of details. The lucids were a couple sleep cycles back, so even they're a little hazy. Still, the dreams were pretty action-packed last night. The first one, I went lucid while flying some kind of open-air helicopter, and it was the biggest "A-ha! I'm dreaming" moment I've had in a while, with the landscape just slamming into vivid detail. I don't remember much beyond flying around. In another one, where I was still lucid, my sister gave me a little 'baby orange,' one of the tiny wedges from the inside of some oranges, for me to eat so I would remember what she'd told me when I woke up, but I woke up right after she handed it to me, before I could eat it. I did remember what she'd told me at the time, but don't anymore :/

My last dream wasn't lucid, but was pretty awesome. It started in this little hobbit-hole of a bar where people organized illegal road-races. I got into a race with two other vehicles and was in 2nd most of the time, behind this big pick-up truck, but then I drafted him and sling shot past, and left the other two in the dust (actually, the last leg of the race was curvy as hell and covered in snow) and beat them back to the bar.

Wow, its like being awoken by Morpheus in the Matrix. Like experiencing reality for the first time! Let me begin...

Part 1: The Realization

I was in my own bedroom when my dream consciousness began. I stood there looking out my window next to my best friend. I asked him if he heard the airplane flying over. He didn't respond so I turned around to see where he was. I found myself in front of my mirror, and THATS WHEN IT HIT ME! I was dreaming! But I didn't panic, and I didn't fret. He looked at me and I even said it out loud "we're dreaming". And to prove it to him and myself I ran at my mirror and dove, and I started hovering right then and there like a parachuter.

NEXT is the exciting part!

Part 2: Something Un-earthly

I went back to my window (2 windows side by side actually, about 6 foot tall and 4 foot wide). I opened the shutters and looked at the moon (it was daytime mind you). I said to my friend, "this doesnt look right". Thats when the moon became the earth, and where we were became an alien planet. We stood there still in my room, but overlooking a alien ocean, which was very very blue unlike any earth shade of blue. I was so excited, being that I've absolutely in love with space and its possibilities. I stood there admiring earth when the earth changed to an earth like planet, and our planet its neighboring planet. It was like the universe was showing me an actual place that exists somewhere in the cosmos. It was showing me an earth like planet, and I was the first to see it. I actually ended up bringing in a celebrity singer and fooling around with her next, but I'll leave that out. haha

Part 3: Losing control

I didn't start losing control until my parents came in to the dream and starting yelling at me about the girl I had in my room.

But overall, a very successful first time! Can't wait to go back there..

The dream didn't feel more real, but it felt like more of the truth. Our existence in this reality makes less sense to me than that in a dream world where we have total control. I want back in!

Method: WILD
Recall: average
Lucid Ability:4
Vividness: Average
Dream Length:Average

Nice easy transition, but everything was black in my room. I wasn't sure about the stabilization, and I didn't care at this point because I was able to move pretty good. I headed out of the room, and into the living room and tried to summon my DG. I told myself that she'd be knocking on the door any second, and waited. Nothing happened. I told myself that same thing again....nothing. I used x-ray vision to see through the door and see if she was on the other side, while visualizing her. Nothing.

I headed outside with no other goals in mind. It was still really dark outside, but the dream was put together by now, and it was just night time. I took off into the air, flying at a high rate of speed, looking for anything. I flew off east, but I ended up at my uncles house to the west of me. I landed and started exploring a bit, and I noticed Mickey was there.

He was armed with a kingdom key, didn't speak a word, and had it out for me. I was dodging the little guys attacks for a while, and eventually pulled out a light saber, and continued defending from the assault. He seemed more like an evil version of his original self, but maybe I was just the bad guy. I remember jumping backwards, and he stopped for a breath, which in turn gave me a chance to pull out a kingdom key of my own (an old goal of mine). Nothing was special about it other than the fact I was wielding it on only one hand. The light saber eventually became sort of an off handed light dagger before fading completely

I made short work of Mickey once I got on the offensive, and continued exploring. Out of no where, the entire cast of the view showed up, and started nagging me. One of the ladies kept hitting on me, and everything was just annoying after that.

non dream - lucid - non lucid

I'm driving my RX-8 over a mountain pass in the alps.
I think I'm somewhere between Klosters and Davos.
I remember that it's an awesome road. I've never driven it myself, but I've been in my dad's car many times on on this road.
But why am I driving to Italy? Oh... that's right... I'm visiting my parents which are currently staying at an hotel in Tirol.
I keep driving for a bit, the road is empty, I'm the only one on it. The weather is fantastic, the sun is shining but it's not too hot.

Wait... I am driving my beloved sportscar on one of the most awesome roads in the world, it is empty and I am driving slowly???
I RC. I laugh because I became lucid this way, apparently driving slowly is really abnormal for me.
I look at the road ahead of me:



This puts a huge smile on my face. I look in my rear view mirror; no-one there.
I disengage the traction control, put it into second and floor the accelerator.
I love the sound of a rotary engine, the way it revs, how it gains power.
I'm passing 9000rpm and am reminded by a "beep" to change into 3rd.
I keep pushing it and quickly reach 4th, now going slightly downhill.
I can clearly feel the aggressive exhaust tone vibrating in my body, as I am pressed into the seat.

A corner approaches.
I go hard on the brakes, heel-toe downshifting back into second.
It feels easy, everything is obvious. I have perfect control over the car.
Every time I downshift, I hear a loud backfire due to excess fuel burning once it leaves the exhaust.
I love this car...

I keep driving down the mountain pass, staying right at the edge of what the car can do.
It occasionally over-steers, but this is quickly remedied by some counter steer.
The car is very stable, I feel absolutely safe.

I'm joined by a RX-7 FD which joins the road in front of me. He's racing as well.
I try to keep up with him and manage to do so mostly.
He's faster on the straight but I can keep up with him in the corners.
Flames shoot out of his exhaust every time he breaks for a corner, and I know my car does the same. Rotaries are awesome.
We both loose it a bit at one point, while driving over a rather hard to see bump, but quickly regain control after a long drift.

We approach a small town and slow down.
This was fun!


My rx-8 is currently at a workshop because the engine was flooded.
I got a call yesterday evening telling me that they fixed it and it's running fine again.
I can't wait to drive it again, even though I've just been without it for 2 days.

1/13/11

1- Failed Planning
I have gone to take the SAT, and for some strange reason Mitchell, my friend's ex-obsessionboyfriend, is with me. He is supposed to be taking the test, too, and my mother is going to pay the fee for him. However, his name does not seem to be on the list. "Can't you just print him off an answer document?" My mom asks the lady.

"Did you even sign up for this, or were you just planning to take it on a whim?" I ask Mitchell in annoyance.

"Sign up?"

I try to explain to my mother that he didn't sign up and that no, they CAN'T just print off an answer document because the College Board deals with that and they would need all of his information. She refuses to listen to me and keeps arguing. I glare at Mitchell, who still does not appear to know what's going on.

Later, he has somehow angered a mob of crazed tourists. I learn that there is some sort of zombie virus outbreak, and that he has tricked the tourists into giving them these tickets that are used to gain passage into a zombie free zone. I snatch the tickets away from him after I chase off the mob. "Why did you take all these in the first place?"

"I needed them for autographs!" Oh my god, what an idiot, I think in disgust.

"Autographs? What the hell are you talking about?" I notice that all of the tickets have the initials RL scrawled on the back of them.

((Also, it seemed like Samael was involved in the whole ordeal, but I can't remember how.))

2- Street Punks
I am riding the school bus, and for some reason my dad is sharing the seat with me and this other girl. She asks my dad why he's coming to school with me. I suddenly wonder the same. What in the world is he doing on the bus? Without learning the answer, we arrive at school and I wander down the hallway. What class am I supposed to go to...? Something is wrong with my memory. I end up at my AP United States History class. "Oh yeah, I have APUSH first period," I remind myself.

But where is all my stuff? Is it in my locker? I go to my locker and find that someone else's stuff is there. "Did we have a locker change again?" I ask a nearby student.

"Yeah, it's really annoying when they do that. Should have waited 'till the next semester."

I remember that my alternate locker number is on my schedule... which is in my locker. Great. ((BTW, there is no such thing as a locker change or an alternate locker number. Yet another false memory.))

I go to the office and find a bunch of band students playing jingle bells very unenthusiastically to a tall, official looking lady. They finish as I enter the room, and she claps happily. I hesitantly approach the lady. "Um, I don't know if you're the right person to ask for this... What is my new locker number?"

"You're number 18," she says cheerily, without even looking at a list. "I placed you myself. See, we try to position everyone based on their abilities."

"Okay... 18. Thanks." How does she know who I am? What abilities? I mull the question over and walk out the wrong door. I get it right on my second try. "Great," I say to myself, embarrassed, "I definitely have 'special' abilities, alright."

At that point I "wake up" in my car, pouring sweat. Ugh it's so hot in here... I look around and note that I'm in the student parking lot. Weird... I don't think we even have school today. Was I sleep driving? I'd better call my mom and let her know where....

My thoughts trail off as I RC and become lucid. All worries assuaged, I observe my surroundings. It is sunny, and though the parking lot is empty, there are people walking everywhere. I happily get out of the car and decide to go on a walk. No telling what might develop along the way.

It isn't long before I come upon a gang of boys who are playing with a yoyo. The youngest (who is about 10) accidentally slams it on the ground and breaks it. "Oh no," he moans. "If Carlos finds out about this, he'll kill all of us." I notice what is in my hand at the same time they do. One of those rubber yoyo's with the flashing lights inside of it. Well, then...

I break into a run, and they all jump on motorcycles and come after me. I'm fast, but they're faster. I make it to a bridge several miles from my house before they catch up with me. Well, I gave them a chance. They chose not to take it.

With an evil grin, I leap into the air just before the bikes would have run me over. They skid to a halt and glare up at me, unfazed by my unnatural performance. I am suddenly hurdling through the air directly at the largest gang member. My foot slams into his chest with enough force to knock him off the bridge to his death. NOW they look appropriately frightened. I make short work of the others. Now only the youngest is left. I do not intend to kill him at first, but then he holds one of his dead comrades in front of him as a shield. This angers me. "Stupid street punk!" I yell as I beat the life out of him.

3- Playing with Energy
I am listening in to the Elders' meeting without their knowledge.

"What? The youngest son of the Uria clan has run off?"

"He is a disgrace to his family."

"What of the eldest?"

"Her position in this matter is unknown. When asked about it, she merely said, 'These things happen.'"

I roll my eyes and place the headphones back on the table. Stupid old bags. Is it really so difficult to understand why my brother ran off?

My uncle walks in the room, and I look as innocent and meek as possible as he goes into his usual speech of upholding the family values, blah blah blah, and I'd better not end up like my "wretch of a brother."

At this point, I RC and become lucid, exiting the role of this Uria character.

I go to the back door and walk outside, thinking about the Queen (yet again) and wondering if I should try to contact her. I am still contemplating this when I look up and notice Sadie sitting nearby with two other cats. One of them seems to be massaging the other's shoulders. At first they look similar to cats I'd previously owned, but then they change slightly and I no longer recognize them.

The one who had been getting the massage runs over to me and bites my hand affectionately. I pet her and ask her what her name is. No answer. "Come on, you can tell me." She still doesn't answer. I look at her black and white companion. "Hey, cat. I know that's not your name, so speak and tell me what it is." No answer. "Sadie?" Sadie turns up her tail and ignores me. "Hmph. Fine, be that way." I ask the cat that I'm petting one more time what her name is, and I hear my stepdad's voice behind me say "Betty."

"Betty?"

"Yeah, that's her name."

He and my brother walk up and start horseplaying. I notice that whenever my brother goes to throw a punch, I can see his energy fly from his hand and hit Chris before the physical impact. "That's interesting," I say. Chris takes some of Steven's energy in his hand and forms it into a ball, then throws it at me. "Ow!" That really hurt. He throws another one, but this time I catch it and examine it closely. I let my own energy flow into it; the ball goes from being clear to swirling with black and purple energy. "Interesting," I say again. I throw the ball at Chris. At first it sticks to my hand and absorbs back into me, but I make a new ball of my own and throw it. I have terrible aim; it lands several feet away and creates a mini explosion.

I notice it's getting dark out, which is a good indication that the dream is getting unstable. I wake up before I can do anything about it.

4- Canoeing
I am watching from above as PJ and a few other people are canoeing in a beautiful wide river surrounded by an evergreen forest. The dream tells me that this is in Detroit, Michigan or maybe Delaware, I can't remember which. I know it started with a D.

In which I fail to stay lucid...

I'm cleaing out my closet and I come across a box of books. I open the first book I see and try to read a page. The words are all real words and they follow a basic sense of English grammar, but they don't make any sense. It said something very similar (maybe not exactly) to this:

The numerous trawling sofas affix zealots in the blind.

I leaned back, touched by the poetry of the words. How pretty "affix zealots in the blind" sounds! Then I started to wonder at the meaning and realized that I didn't actually understand the line. I looked at it again, but this time it said (again, close but not exactly):

Battered and flourescent utilities of ionic compounds lull banners.

I thought that maybe they were talking about the properties of ionic compounds and the banners of zealots. It didn't seem as pretty this time, and I was aware that the words had changed. Some of the phrases kept repeating over and over again in my mind, especially the "affix zealots in the blind" part and the "utilities of ionic compounds" part. I kept hearing them, loud, and finally realized that it wasn't my poor reading skills- these words simply did not make sense.

I realized I was dreaming. I got very excited and stood up to do a reality check. Instead of pinching my nose or rubbing my hands (which is really what I'm supposed to do), I walked over to my window and opened the blinds. I could see my bird feeders and bird bath, but the image was frozen. All the birds were still frolicking and eating, but they were frozen as if in a picture. There was a hawk frozen in mid-flight.

I'm dreaming! I thought excitedly. Then I woke up.

Just read how to WILD before going to bed at 1:00. Set alarm for 6:00 to WILD, but just fell back asleep. Woke up at 9:20, decided to give it a go . . .

Relaxed and watched the blackness, felt/heard a buzzing. When the buzzing stopped, I opened my eyes. I took a quick glance at my hands, six fingers a piece per usual (in this world anyways); I knew I was dreaming. I got out of my loft bed and went down some stairs to the ground level, where I saw a mirror on the wall. I tried to crawl through the mirror, but without success. So I walked outside. I was in my Ohio neighborhood. I decided that I wanted to head to a warm coastal location (which in my dream land is usually located to the South. As I leisurely ran south, I found myself downtown and where there were quite a few tanks (too many video games). I jumped onto one, ran around another and decided to run east as there only seemed to be more battle in the south. Next, I found myself driving a sports car on a highway, and then into a suburban area. I got out and began walking again, saw a few people, and woke up.

It was lots of fun, and I look forward to trying it again tonight! This is the first time I ever had a WILD, and the 5 step plan helped a lot!

Dream - Lucid

I MILDed again!

I just used my mantra of "I will become lucid" and also said "I will reality check" a couple of times. Yay! I'm glad I found a method that works. Thanks, Matte!

I was at my house. Some mini leprechaun guy, I think it was supposed to be a guy I know in waking life named Jonni, killed my friend/coworker Virginia in her sleep at her apartment. He was very smart, so there's no way she or anyone could elude him, even if the attack was known about in advance. I was terrified this would happen to me, and my parents were at a movie. I was home alone, and it was getting late. I tried to call my mom and she said they'd be home soon. I fell asleep and woke up quite a few times, each time with a wave of terror upon waking. I called my mom a few more times. I fell asleep and woke up again, and my mom was home, working in her office. It was midnight. I went over to her and told her how scared I was. She seemed annoyed and told me she could just give me a Xanax and lay there with me until I fell asleep, but she truthfully hated doing that for my dad. She said if I didn't fall asleep, she wouldn't do it. I got excited and told her I promised I'd fall asleep. I thought to myself even if I didn't fall asleep, I could pretend so she wouldn't leave.

~

I had another dream, but I swore I'd remember it and didn't write it down. Guess what? I forgot it. I fell asleep and woke up again, and decided to MILD. I did my mantras until I fell asleep.

~

I was in an episode of Family Guy. The story was about how one of the characters met his wife. It wasn't a very funny episode though. We were on a bus going to basic training for the military. I was sitting with a younger version of Peter. He pulled out a bag of pot mixed with cocaine, and said we could just do the coke off our fingers. I really didn't want to do that. He had just pulled it out, opened it, and stared at it for awhile.

We got to basic training. It was nighttime outside. We walked through the grass to a screened-in shed that had many seats in front of a stage-type thing with a podium on it for a speaker. We were supposed to listen to someone talk, but they weren't there yet. I smoked a cigarette with Peter. We saw the girl that one of the characters was supposed to meet. She was a cartoon with long, brown, wavy hair and she was dressed all in blue. She smiled flirtatiously as she flipped her hair. Peter's voice came on in the background to say something like "And there she was.".

The speaker finally came, a big black woman, and we all sat in the chairs. We listened to her talk, and she told us that we had to get up at 5 A.M. every day because one of the people in charge had to get up that early. I thought that was a little ridiculous, but it was the military, so I didn't argue. We were dismissed. I took Peter's hand and he offered me a cigarette. I took one, and he lit mine off of his. We walked past this little area where there were big rocks surrounding a tree in a semi circle. Morrie from Tuesdays With Morrie was there, all cartoonified. Him and Peter made some sort of joke, and we kept walking. We went into another little screened-in shed. There was a big banner lying on a table to welcome us. A big rainbow appeared on the banner. I thought it was very sarcastic sounding, since it was welcoming us to the military.

Wait what? Rainbows don't just appear on banners. I was dreaming! I knew the dream was almost over, but I examined my hands anyway to induce clarity. Things kept fading, but I finally stabilized them a bit. I did an RC. There was a chalkboard/marker board in the room. It had an orange spiral drawn on it with text inside of it. There were little stick people drawn off to the side. I glanced away and looked back. The text had changed, and the spiral was smaller. I floated up through the ceiling and ended up inside my family's bonus room. I could feel that I was going to wake up any minute, so I quickly thought of something I could do in a short amount of time. I decided to fly through space, if only for a minute. I took off through the ceiling and I was in space! It was beautiful. There were purpleish-blue stars everywhere, and I saw an orange galaxy off in the distance. It was amazing. It only lasted a few seconds though, before it started to fade to black.

13 JAN 2011

Nearing the apparent conclusion of a lengthy and dramatic dream, I find myself running through narrow streets and building sites in an attempt to reach 'safety'. I recognise this as a fear-based situation and gradually become lucid. Scaffolding poles begin to fall around me, and I instinctively cover my head with my arm, even as I am beginning to sense that I cannot actually be harmed.

As I consider my options, I realise that the first thing I should do is simply step out of the narrative; an option available to anyone, at any time, whether dreaming or awake (for only then can other options be clearly considered). And, sure enough, the moment I stop running everything around me becomes totally quiet and serene - eerily so, in fact.

Looking into the distance, I see a huge metallic monolith blocking my way. Then I focus on what's immediately around me (rubble, a digger truck, wasteland) and feel this to be one of the most solid and 'realistic' dream environments I've ever experienced. So much so, in fact, that the prospect of flying or manipulating objects seems as unlikely as it does in waking reality. As an experiment, therefore, I resort to verbal commands (which have worked in the past).... "Take me up there," I demand, looking at the giant monolith. But nothing happens.

Of course, there was no compelling reason to go onwards, since I had stepped outside of the narrative. Indeed, there was nowhere to go at all, nor anything to achieve, in the absence of a linear context of some kind. [In the absence of the ego?] And this realisation filled me with a profound sense of bliss and freedom. As I contemplated the matter further, I felt that I was being given a valuable insight into the subtle nature of the prison (the egoic auto-pilot) which keeps most people enslaved. And it really is 'subtle', at the end of the day... Freedom itself being nothing more than a shift in one's perspective.

Notes

In light of the above dream, I would like to refine my description of OILD. Specifically, I would like to introduce the concept of a get out of jail free card (or 'option') which exists permanently in one's back pocket, so to speak, regardless of whether one is awake or asleep. In other words, it's not merely that one has other options to consider, in any given situation (context based), but that one [always] has the option to 'play the card' and transcend the context altogether. Indeed, this is the first option that one should utilise when 'triggered' to do so by obstacles, conflicts or fear-based situations, etc.

Needless to say, it's not as easy as it sounds, because emotions, fear and ego tend to prevail. This is because we are totally identified with the 'narrative' of own waking lives and the resulting sense of identity. I suppose what I'm ultimately referring to here is detachment, clarity of mind, and the dissolution of the apparent self (if only temporarily)... Which is, of course, the goal of many spiritual traditions, which also happen to see "lucid dreaming" as an indication of one's progress.

"Use your perceived enemy to destroy your real enemy."

OILD - Because there's ALWAYS another option!

Finally lucid!!!!!! :banana:

[INDENT][RIGHT][SIZE="1"][COLOR="#808080"]12.01.2011[/COLOR][/SIZE][/RIGHT]
[SIZE="3"][COLOR="Black"]1/12/11 - 12[/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE="1"][COLOR="#808080"](DILD)[/COLOR][/SIZE]

[SIZE="1"][COLOR="#808080"]NON-DREAM[/COLOR] [COLOR="#1E90FF"]DREAM[/COLOR] [COLOR="#DC143C"]LUCID[/COLOR][/SIZE]

[COLOR="#808080"][/COLOR][COLOR="#1E90FF"]1) It's night and I'm near X Street. I'm walking across the lawn of the house next to NC's old house and I begin to walk down the driveway. Wait, this must be a dream! [/COLOR][COLOR="#DC143C"]I'm lucid! I can't panic, I don't want this one to end right away like all my other ones! I need to rub my hands together and spin. I remember reading a Wikipedia article that said 96% of people can stay in their lucids longer if they rub their hands together The test was conducted by Stephen LaBerge, who's the most credible source in the field, so I'm going to try that. I rub my hands together while spinning and I actually don't wake up!! This is great; I'm finally in a lucid! I remember that I can't be too excited, or else I'd wake up.

I feel pretty calm and turn around to look at the road. There are lots of people walking down the sidewalk on the other side of the street, despite it beign night. They're kind of hunched over and are walking at a rather rapid pace. I want to kill them. Since this is a dream, I should be able to think them dead and they should die right there. I imagine them withering and falling to the ground, but they don't. They simply walk by and I try remotely killing another group, but this attempt is also unsuccessful. I look to my left and FH is there, presumably trying to attack me, but I don't really know. She's only about a foot away from me, so hopefully I'll be able to kill her because of the shorter distance. I flex my muscles and wish her dead, but she remains standing. In a desperate attempt to halt this menace before me, I try to freeze her, hoping that she'll be locked immovably in a block of ice for eternity. However, this fails as well. Discouraged, I walk back towards the driveway and begin to feel the dream fading away. I rub my hands again and can feel the friction, [/COLOR][COLOR="#1E90FF"]but I've woken up and the dream is now over. [/COLOR][COLOR="#808080"](Not really, but I think it's over.)

[/COLOR][COLOR="#1E90FF"]2)[/COLOR][COLOR="#808080"] False awakening from 1. [/COLOR][COLOR="#1E90FF"]I'm in the kitchen checking my phone, and I see that I have a text from my mother telling me good luck on my LD. I'm somewhat alarmed, as my mother shouldn't know about LDing!! I've been trying to keep it a secret from her. Oh well, it's not a big deal. The tone in the text sounds positive and she doesn't seem mad; by using the abbreviation "LD," she probably has at least a cursory knowledge of the subject.

3) I'm on a bus. DS's mom makes him come over to play with me. I realize that must be pretty embarrassing for him, but I realize it's not his fault, it's his mother's. He walks up to me and says, "BINGO!" He pulls out a game that's apparently called BINGO. He gives me a purple Skittle and tells me to eat it. I do, and he tells me the point of the game is that we both eat Skittles and then we have to guess how many are left in the other person's mouth. We have to try to swallow some without the other person noticing.

4) I'm in a store with JF. There are small glass items on shelves. JF and I talk, and AG and/or dad might have been there too.

5) I'm reading the newspaper in the kitchen. My parents are showing me an article? and they tell me that I'm looking through yesterday's paper. No wonder it looked so familiar! I pick up the one under it and begin searching through it for the article?

6) I'm dining in a very high-scale restaurant. There's an opulent carpet and everyone is wearing suits. A gargantuan chandelier hangs from the ceiling. The roof is open so we can the city outside: it's nighttime and the city is bustling and bright. JM is on my left and BS is on my right. We're at a huge table with a bunch of people from school and we're having a great time in this really wealthy place. I look through the place where there's no roof and see an unusally large plane. It says on it in huge blue letters, "American Airlines." It's going towards the White House, and I'm kind of conflicted - society has taught me that it's bad to wish for bad things upon other people, but in my heart I thought it would be pretty cool to witness a major plane crash myself. The plane smashes into the White House. I momentarily regret my decision, as perhaps just thinking that thought caused the greatest tragedy in American history. I know that thousands of people died, as there were were tons of people in there, including the president, at a huge party. I think about where I am for a moment, glad I'm safe. Oh, wait. I'm in Boston's Logan Airport, probably filled with thousands of people. Most people in the city are probably here. I look around the room I'm in and there are probably over a thousand people in this room alone. I look into the sky and see a train curving towards us. It has a number on top of it like a bus, but it's long enough to be a train. It's flying through the air over the city and it's headed straight for us. We're going to die.

Everyone runs around in vain, screaming like it's the apocalypse. I turn to BS and look at him before getting up and running down the huge staircase. It's a futile attempt, though; the train hits and we all die.

7) I'm on DV when I'm not supposed to be. My dad walks into the room and says, "I hear typing. You're not supposed to be typing now." I desperately try to close the window in fear, but he catches me. I'm in HUGE trouble.

8) UJ is on the back porch telling me about gifts he gave me when I was little. My mother has some stuff to say about them, too.

9) I'm playing through a video game. It's a really long game and it felt like I was playing it for days. [/COLOR][COLOR="#808080"]I think it was a really long dream.

[/COLOR][COLOR="#1E90FF"]10) I'm in an abandoned house and it's towards the end of the movie?????

11) I'm at the intersection of X Street and Y Street. It's the beginning of a movie, which is meant to be a comedy. An African-American middle-aged man had the situation under control, but then a young Asian-American (probably around 25) arrived in a police car, but he wasn't much help. He was probably an inexperienced new police officer.

12) I'm walking down Z Street, and at the bend something happens. (I look at a dog?)[/COLOR][/INDENT]

1/12/11

1- Why Reality Checks Are Useful
Driving has never been incredibly easy for me, but it's certainly never been this difficult! What is wrong with me today? Or is it the car? I flinch and hit the brakes nearly ten feet from the stopped car in front of me, but my stupid Kia keeps moving and bumps into it. Either the driver doesn't notice, or he doesn't care. More than a bit unnerved, I turn onto the interstate and head STRAIGHT INTO ONCOMING TRAFFIC!!! Oh my God, I'm going to die!

In a panic, I swerve to the right side of the road, lose control of the car (as if I ever had control in the first place), and slam into a vehicle who was blaring their horn at me in horror. My car is totaled. "Good thing this is just a dream," I say to myself right before I die.

I am majorly confused. My mother tells me that I wrecked my car, but I am certain that the crash was only a dream. Was it possible that the car was destroyed as a RESULT of my dream? Or am I dreaming right now? Hmm...

The dream changes. I am now a man who has been killing people in his sleep. The memory is vague at this point, but I recall looking at a lady with short blond hair who was holding a bloody knife...

★★★☆☆

01/09/11

I just found a Star Wars game for my phone. I decide to try it out, so I'm tilting it left and right, figuring out the controls. Spacebar is jump.

I'm in the game. My surroundings are a dank green, covered in vines and rot. This was a school once. I try out the jump command, disappointed when I realize I have only first-level force jump. It doesn't matter; I'll be able to get around just fine.

Obi-Wan's shade appears beside me to explain my mission. This is strange, because I'm pretty sure I'm a past version of him. The force ghost fizzles out and disappears, exploding into four green blobs of goo. They reform and immediately begin to scuttle about, taking shape as Gravelings, mischievous reptilian creatures that arrange the accidental deaths of the people around them.

I strike with my single lightsaber, v-stepping in and twisting away after I cut through the torso of one of the gravelings. The creature goes still in shock, before it disintegrates in a flash of red sparks. With a sweep of my lightsaber, the others are scuttling away. I finish them off with force lightening.

Later, alone in an empty room, I suddenly realize that I'm dreaming. It feels like waking up. I try to remember my goals, but I come up blank. Fine - I'll run. I love to run in dreams. I take a running start and leap from a four-foot ledge.

In one reality, I can feel myself flying.
I drift away, into the blue, blue sky, heedless of the ceiling that used to be there. Simultaneously I'm falling, landing. I can feel the remnants of the other reality until all four of my limbs slowly reach the floor. I lay my forehead onto the cold cement and just breathe.

I see Zoe, walking away into a crowd of faceless people. I call out to her, chase after her. Her blonde hair swishes as she half turns, keeps walking.

We're sitting side by side, looking at the massive crowd milling about through the mall. She's counting the cash in a till.

"There's something you want to tell me," she says, flipping through a pile of five dollar bills.

"Yep."

She scowls, but doesn't turn to look at me. "Well?" she asks, "What is it?"

"You could say," I smile faintly, "That I have slightly more than platonic feelings for you."

Her hands go still. "Oh."

"But that doesn't matter," I say, leaning back.

"And why is that?"

"Because," I say, and I stretch my hands out in front of my face, "None of this is real."

And the dream dissolves into static.

Running. Scare Factor: 3.