lucid

Dream that involved a train or subway station. It was a long and creepy dream, but I recall no details.

Another faux-lucid dream. I was restrained by a former colleague (don't recall which one), who had put chains around my wrists. He knew I could easily break them if he used just one normal chain, so he used several, made from very thick metal. So, he was aware of my lucid powers, and so was I, even though I don't think I was lucid! I was keen on showing the bastard he couldn't stop me, the dreamer, and tried to break the chains. The first time, I couldn't. Then I focused, convincing my mind the chains aren't real (there is no spoon!) - and this time they broke. I remember menacingly walking after an older man who worked there as well, scaring the hell out of him. He fled in terror, and I felt somewhat bad for him. I yelled after him that he should retire (???). I also (for the umpteenth time) learned to levitate and then fly, which I used during my attempts to terrorize my ex-colleagues.

11.09.2016

(DEILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I woke up from a dream and decided to do a RC. I was dreaming. I tried to get out of bed but I couldn't. I waited a bit and tried again. I landed on the floor. I couldn't get up, my body felt extremely heavy. I tried stabilizing by rubbing my hands but it didn't work, I couldn't feel my hands. I fell on my back. I thought of MadMonkey's Stability Potion. I spawned a stability candy, it was yellow. I ate it and gained momentary stability, but the heaviness came back right away.

I was back in bed, did another RC, still dreaming. I tried to get up but I couldn't. I levitated and reached the stairs. I tried to stand up but fell down the stairs.

I was back in bed. One eye was closed. I opened it and thought I was opening it IRL, as I was facing the same way on my bed in both the dream and IRL it was hard to tell. I teleported to the stairs. My mom was organizing the closet. I opened the door, it was dark outside. I closed the door and opened it again, it was a bit lighter. I tried to get outside but I couldn't. I heard someone falling through the stairs. I turned around and there was nothing. I was afraid it had been my dog IRL, but then thought there was no way I would have heard that.

My DEILD alarm woke me up (oh the irony). I stayed still. I plugged my nose and I was dreaming surprisingly. I couldn't out of bed. I spun around really fast and ended up watching a game. I was controlling one of the characters, I was in a plaza in the middle of the day. I went into my character so I could have a body. I started running while rubbing my hands. I tried to take off but I fell.

I had a few more FAs/DEILD Chains and they were all crappy. I woke up a bit mad that I couldn't enjoy any of these.

11.09.2016

(DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I was travelling with my Physio class to a conference. The first part of the trip was on train, the second one on plane. During the liftoff we were told to decompress due to the change of atmospheric pressure. I plugged my nose, thought of doing a RC, but instead blew air through my nose and felt my ears pop.

We arrived at the city and I went to the hotel I would be staying at. Mt dad and brother were there. We went for lunch and then back to the hotel. The next day I went to the conference; we were all really excited about it. We listened to a few talks and then played games. I went back to the hotel, and I was flying back the next morning. My brother and dad were going to be driving back. They dropped me off at the airport and left. My class was there; we were going to be using a more advanced plane which we had to board mid-flight. We were each in a capsule that would launch towards the plane. I got in mine and waited. I heard the capsules being sent one at a time, then followed by silence, then commotion.

Someone opened my capsule. They told me they had terrible news. Something had gone wrong; everyone in my class was dead. My dad heard the news and came to pick me up. He was happy nothing had happened to me, but I felt guilty. We went back to the hotel, I couldn't stop crying. My dad explained that they had made a stupid mistake in one of the calculations and that he could have done it better himself. I went to bed and my brother told me that he had heard that it was done on purpose; someone wanted us dead. He then said there was also a theory that we were being haunted by a ghost or something; I said that if that was the case I would probably be dead by tomorrow.

The next morning I was alone in the hotel room. I started hearing loud bangs at the door and decided to hide. I went through different rooms and reached a huge washroom with different showers. I hid in one and tried to remain calm. This can't be happening, I thought. I plugged my nose and took a deep breath. I did it again just to make sure I was dreaming. I was extremely relieved to know it was a dream. I thought about continuing the dream plot, but then thought it was such a shitty dream that I decided to do my own thing. I went through the wall and found myself in the town. I looked up and got ready to take off when the dream crashed.

Another great, long dreaming night with 1-2 epics. And a first! Probably my earliest LD ever, somewhere around 2.5 hours in the first (noticed) waking of the night. And not just a weak, low-awareness LD, but a TOTM success LD that included a successful teleport out of the void! I set very strong intention to get lucid tonight. I also prepared 4mg galantamine + 300mg alpha gpc by my bedside for WBTB (but never took it, keeping it in reserve for tonight perhaps).

@ ~ 2.5-3 hrs

+ lucid 202: I'm hugging my old dog L. He's facing me and hugging me back (in retrospect a bit too tightly and compulsively but in the dream it seemed fine), my face is buried in his chest and my hands are holding him tightly to me, I'm telling him "I love you, I love you!". Then I'm in my CH living room and I'm lucid. Lighting is subdued, like it's dark outside. As soon as I'm lucid I think "woohoo, #202". I'm pacing around between the living room and the entry hallway. I remember TOTM and I remember grow a tail. I'm standing on the corner of the big buffet which has a mirror and I will a tail to grow. I move it around over my right shoulder then I see it and touch it with my right hand and inspect it. It is a flat dark brown color, slightly fuzzy, and feels like the tail of a stuffed animal. I will the tail to move around some more and see its shadow on the floor in front of me, moving, I say "swish! swish!" I now want to do a basic task as well and I know I know the tasks and I feel positive that they will come to me at any instant but I just can't remember them. Next thing I know I'm pacing in total blackness. I decide I don't want to be here and I want to try a portal teleport. I lift my right hand and start to draw a portal in the air in front of me, expecting to see a shining outline appear, but nothing appears. I start over again, still unable to see any portal trail, but now I finish drawing a large oval in the air in front of me. I imagine it leads to <forgotten!>, as I start to step through I think perhaps I should have specified instead that it leads to Amber [Zelazny's fantasy realm] but I decide to keep my original destination.

I find myself in a brightly lit city scape full of people, sort of medieval looking, the city is on a hill. I take off flying and I'm immediately surrounded by thousands of little flies or tiny drones, the faster and farther I try to go to evade them, the more that surround me. Lost all lucidity now, I'm talking with someone about what the cost is to (teleport me?) get to somewhere else. The guy says that he does not accept military contracts and there is something about the cost he offers.

wake up and review dream, check time, about 2.5 hours after bed. I decided it was too early to take the galantamine, and went back to sleep. Very happy with what is probably my first successful intentional teleport.

(@5-6 hours)

+ CH thief:
I'm standing on the street looking down the driveway at my CH and I sense something is wrong. The doors of the house are open and the lights are on. I'm looking and noticing open doors. I decide to jump down and surprise the thief if one's there. I "jump/fly" down in one swoop from the street down to the back porch of the house and I detect an intruder in the house who runs away. He runs down the back garden stairs and jumps off the lawn down to neighbor's back yards. I do another big jump/fly down to him and there's a branch on the ground and a pair of long-handled pruning shears which he picks up and faces me to fight, <rest forgotten>.

+ slop:
I'm sitting/lying on the ground outdoors. A small girl comes up to me and lays across me diagonally and hugs me and I hug her back, I feel love coming from her, she tells me, "Thank you for holding me!". Then I'm lying in some sort of trough and my wife and some other women throw in buckets of what I think is "pig slop", grey and thick and muddy, which I had been expecting but they threw it before I expected it and it splashed on my face. "Great!" I say with sarcasm, "you got it on my face!" and they react with concern.

+ scoot:
I'm on a bicycle on mixed suburban/urban roads, I approach a busy intersection and use the hand brakes on the handlebars to slow down, I notice that the "turn left" arrow is lit and I'm following a dotted line painted on the ground that leads on to a sidewalk, and I follow it there. There are some cars coming down the sidewalk the other way and I'm surprised/annoyed by this. I continue on the sidewalk, now scooting? Now on inline-skates, I'm coming up on some people who are slow moving so I speed up to overtake them right as a guy is trying to pass me. My new speed prevents him from passing me and we're now running/skating side by side. "I'm sorry, I didn't know you were there," I explain to him. Now I'm pushing myself with cross-country ski poles, still on inline skates, and getting some good speed from this. He's running. I wonder now many miles we can go like this, probably all the way up into the hills.

+ epic: ski
I begin with thoughts and light visuals about a job where I worked at one former job while I worked still at another former job -- this is a (somewhat) reoccuring dream pattern about work. Then (I? someone?) says one of the benefits of the job is the big ski jump hill they build outside, and I imagine a large, wide, slide with alternating steep and level sections. Then someone else talks about the downhill skiing park that was built, then I'm standing at the top of the hill with skiis on and start skiing down. The guy had been saying about how fast you could do. The hill was quite steep but fairly flat. I'm hopping between left ski downslope and right ski downslope skillfully and wondering about just how much time it takes to perform one of these hops once you decide to do it. Then I run off a series of jumps off the left side of the trail, and finally I'm falling about 100 feet or more and think "oops now I've done it" and I'm trying to plan my landing place. I'm anticipating a bad impact really hurting my legs. But then I realize that as long as I land on a steep part of the slope below me there won't be much impact. I land and feel no problem with my legs. I jump again and this time I'm jumping over a river and I need to plan my landing, this time the snow runs out and my skies are clattering along bare rocks but on a smoothed pathway. I thought my skiis would get ripped to shreds but the stones are very smooth and I just slowly glide to a halt.

Now what am I going to do? I have probably skied somewhere around 20 (kms? miles?) and trudging back up that massive hill that long with ski boots and my skis in hand is just not going to happen, so I resolve to go forwards to see where I am. I quickly come across a building, sort of a cabin, with a sign on it, amidst pine trees, it's a large building like a camp building. But sort of run down, like it's not popular any more. I come across the main camp building which is similar (sort of run-down, out of date architecture), with people milling about. The camp is not in session, it's called "sundowner <something>" or "summer <something>". I talk to a staff member about getting back to where I came from and she mentioned that they had a taxi that I could take. "Taxi! Perfect!" I say and go to it. I'm then standing on a mini-bus holding a pole and I'm thinking about how I'm going to pay the taxi since I don't have any money with me. I then realize that I don't have my skiis with me, and that I don't remember taking them off, or my boots, or putting them anywhere. I just remember that my final skiing portion was near a river/creek and ask the driver to take me by there so I can look for them.

While standing on the taxi I "remember" that I came here with some friends and they're not all here, we have to find them, I'm confused about where they are. I'm going to have to call my dad to come get us(?) and figure out how to meet him. "Where's Lawrence Y? [boy scout]" I see a double ski holder thing (that you carry skis in on the roof of your car) in the bus and I open it and look at the skis and they're covered with colorful shiny glitter stickers.

I walking then go through a door and inside CE (my movie buddy when I interned at lab) is teaching a piano harmony lesson. She is going to play improvised scales in D-flat (major?) She begins and starts with something like 6th and 4th chords, then normal ones, I keep listening for a Maj7 chord but never hear one, and feel like I should sneak to the keyboard and hit the Bb key to make her do it, but I never do, I'm listening to her scales for about a minute.

wake:
I'm thinking now that it's too late to take the G. Review dreams, toss and turn a bit, work on BTS and get BTS. Tell myself "the next thing I see will be a dream" and performing the dream-hand nose-pinch RC on exhales once in a while. Tell myself "I will fall asleep and get lucid." BTS

(9-10 hours?)

+ elevator: there's a problem with the work elevator, I'm talking with the CEO (female) about it. It has to do with the old power board. I walk down the stairs with my son and realize it's a long way down and I head back up to fix the power board. I continue talking and say that the issue is due to the software's access pattern of the various power terminals. We could fix it by making sure the software doesn't use too many of them at the same time. But couldn't we just buy a new power station, "it would only cost, what, $20,000?".

+ cables/work/girl: <a bunch forgotten> also at work and there's a presentation being prepared in some large audience or dining hall. I have cables that are part of the projection system in my hand. We're (taking a break?) and everyone's putting their components of the projection system down on a table in front of a techie guy, and I put two short orange cables as well and say these are important. I'm moving through the crowd and a lot of people are in my say. There's are some young people on the stage and I notice in particular a cute girl with lipstick on, briefly. Then I'm moving back stage and a girl is there and I encourage her to follow me. I see a tent set up and open it and motion for her to go inside. We go inside and make out a bit?

+ (semi)epic: park / basketball:

... I'm looking at the newly refurbished basketball level of my CH neighborhood park. They've replaced the concrete/asphalt with a slightly bouncy black material like on modern playgrounds, it is very black. I'm just standing there on the far side facing the main entry side, noting all the changes they've made. They've adjusted the positions of the basketball hoops somewhat, moving the one by the back road fence even more to the left, and the main basket has been raised very high, and there's a secondary basket twice as high as well. I notice that they've also built very tall fences between this level and the middle level (guess so that balls thrown won't go between levels or get lost in the foliage). I continue looking at the tall netting and notice then that there is also a ceiling netting high over the entire basketball level, 50 or more feet up. I hope that it's strong so that if anybody climbs up there, it doesn't rip or they'd fall. I see briefly a circular section of the netting that looks like a 10-foot diameter spider web.

I take a running leap off the raised pathway and fly/glide low over the courts to the opposite corner (by the bike rack). The entire court is covered in what looks like scrunched up brown paper napkins/towels. They're light and I can easily brush them aside to see the shiny new flooring/ground-cover they've installed. There is some "new plastic" odor. I see shiny markings on the ground, bumpy and extending up from the surface like the stuff crosswalks are painted with, but colorful. I start to run across the ground and pump my legs really fast and wonder about running really fast. Then a brilliant emerald green object on the ground catches my attention, I'm wondering what this beautiful thing could be. As I can see more of it I "remember" [FALSE] that I've seen this before, it's a sort of walkway made from modular pieces that you can put together to make a path, and parts of it are black rubber and parts are that emerald gemstone material, but I think it doesn't look quite as good as I thought at first.

I notice on the main basketball court on the lower (but still high) hoop there is a sign: "females only". Well that's ridiculous, they've taken two of the courts and made them girls only, hardly any girls play basketball here, what's the point?

A man/coach is there now and he's getting some guys together to play some basketball. I say I can't play because <I have to do something, forgot>. He's got only 3 guys together to play, that's not enough.

It was a really dark early morning. It was during a winter, there were snowdrifts on the roadsides and there was some ice on the road. I left my house, but I wasn't wearing any jacket - I only had a gray shirt, black trousers and black shoes. I went towards my old school, there was something important I had to do. I had troubles with walking and breathing, I scrambled towards the school. On the way I saw some people going there too, I thought "Last year in technical, and now I have to get back to previous one for a year!". I finally reached the school and immediately saw some people I know that shouldn't be there.

This made me realize that it's a dream. I left the building for a while and saw my car standing at the parking lot. I went to it and inside I found some paper sheet with strange calculations written on it. The handwriting was identical to mine. I got back to school and looked around. I thought about meeting with someone, but that wasn't enough to summon her. Instead I chosen to talk with someone else - a tall blonde haired woman wearing a white dress. I said that I have something to deliver to her and we went outside. As we were going to car, she got scared of me and ran away to school. I tried to chase her but I slipped on the ice. I got up and went back to the building, in search of that woman. I searched on the hallway, in toilets and then I found her on the corridor. I told her that I don't have time for such fooling around and I have to deliver that package. We got to my car, I showed her the paper sheet, folding it before so she wouldn't see calculations. I told her to sign it with an x and go Roth me towards warehouses. As we moved on, I noticed someone following us. I thought about removing that dude from my dream, but somehow he was resistant to my powers. However, he wasn't resistant to telekinesis. I gestured and thrown him far far away. Then we entered the warehouses. Instead of giving her that package, I persuaded her to make it out with me. I didn't knew that it was a military warehouse, and as we were doing it, soldiers appeared and surrounded us. Then a loading screen with warehouse appeared. I found myself in some corridor going to warehouse. Instead of entering I went through doorway that was behind me. A map appeared, there was some sunny valley. I chosen it and got teleported to some dark grove. I summoned that woman. She was a bit different, as she had brown hair this time. I saw myself from third . She was scared of me and the grove and started running away. I chased her, throwing fat monsters with long horns away using telekinesis. I got her and after a while oh talking we made it out again. I have lost lucidity.

I found myself in my house with younger sister and that woman. We took out rc cars and drove around my room.

09.09.2016
08:00 AM

Hanging Out With Juliana 2 (DILD)

My bedroom is the bathroom of a fair grounds??? I am try to sleep but I see people waling around outside. I get out of bed and look in the mirror. I notice that I have nipple piercings. WTF? I put on a shirt and do a nose plug rc and become lucid. I summon Juliana. She has long red hair again and I tell her I like this look best on her. She is wearing a red button up shirt with short sleeves, a black tie, skirt, and coat with a short cape attached to the shoulders. We go outside and I forget that I was going to ask for my next magic lesson. I mention the fact that I have never seen her cat form and ask her to transform. She says there are to many people around and she has something to show me first. We run for about 30 seconds to the other side of the fair where there are food places. She says to get this one thing on the menu. I see that it is $30 and don't want to spend that money. I had lost a lot of lucidity I guess. Dream money doesn't matter! I ask her to use a spell to make the workers not charge me so much. She pulls out a wand and waves it around and says it worked. I go over and order it. I momentarily loose stability while they make my food. It is a hot dog with pulled pork and nacho cheese and other things on it. It also comes with fries and a large cupcake. It is friken amazing! I start to wake up again and can't find Juliana so I stick my hand back. She takes hold of it right away and points to some other food I should try. I remember what my actual goal was as I wake up.

I kept having dreams all night but I didn't record them all because I really needed some sleep. I woke up when Meesha came in to be fed & closed the door so she wouldn't interrupt my sleep. Sorry Meesha Cat, but mommy needs to sleep!

I dreamed that I was w/ my family most of the night. Not my children, husband, grandchildren, but my core family from when I was young that extended to my grandparents and such. We were in various places. I even found myself lucid but felt a strange pull to not change the dream. I felt like I was supposed to pay attention & learn. We were all in this gorgeous palace. The steps were like a block wide with giant pillars. The details were spectacular! I was really enjoying the details. My family was yet again trying to get me to interact w/ Crazy Daisy, my mom's mom. I was trying to calmly tell them that I do forgive her but I just don't choose to have such a compulsively toxic person in my life. There were a lot of tea settings & bells. Crazy Daisy collects bells & I came across a bunch of them in a store I frequent just a week ago. We went down into a theater in the palace. I went first & walked along the rows of red velvet chairs. When I got to the end off to the side of the stage I was discussing where we should put our stuff before we go back behind the stage. I was told to just put them near one of the folding velvet movie like chairs. I looked out over the auditorium & couldn't figure out what we were all going to do. I went up to the curtain & pulled it back & woke up.

So I got a lucid but stayed true to myself & just bathed in the realness of it all. The great detail & such. I think we don't do enough of that & it's the foundation of lucid dreaming. Reminding yourself how real the dreamscape is in & of itself. My pull to find meaning was very strong. I don't know if my grandmother will pass soon or what. I also don't know why suddenly she is in a bunch of my dreams. It's odd. Usually dreams like that for me mean death, I'm going to talk to them soon, or I'm going to see them soon. Yes, that is a real gift I have. I also can ask where things are out loud & then find them. My husband loves that particular gift. I text him during the day opposed to saying it out loud some times because it works best when I ask him in particular for some reason. He also thinks I could find the winning lottery numbers somehow, lol. But I don't think it works that way. I have been talking out loud lately to my grand parents that have passed in hopes that they here me & give me a sign. Maybe it was that. I do forgive my grandmother, that is very real. I just don't like the feeling that I have about my family thinking I should talk to her. When they themselves acknowledge that she is a compulsive liar & fake. My parents & my brother are atheists & me & my sisters are not so we have an interesting dynamic. And when I say they are atheists, I mean they try to push that down people's throats on social media & are just as bad as people who do the same w/ religion. Good people yet pushy w/ this subject for some reason. I love them but they would never understand how spiritual I've become & would only mock it like they mock my cousin, who faithfully every day on Facebook is giving her thanks to God for everything. She also used to have an abusive ex like I did so I get it but yet she's still on the extreme side but always positive which is better than being a negative atheist. That's not to bash anyone but to say I don't like people being pushy in a negative way. At least my cousin doesn't push it on anyone. My sisters on the other hand have been in my thoughts. I have been struggling w/ telling them about some of the changes in my life such as lucid dreaming & other things that have been happening spiritually to me for like, forever, lol..... That's probably what this dream was really about. I talk to my family every day via a group text which is continuous. This is due to my parents new found traveling now that they have retired via their RV. They are currently in Canada.

Non-Lucid-Green
Lucid-Red
Side Notes-Purple
Astral Projection/AP-Brown/OOB

September 8, 2016: I am unloading pre-cut as well as uncut stone pavers from the side door of a huge delivery truck. I repeatedly and tediously carry them down a lane bordered on my left by a brick retaining wall which stands about nipple high. After walking about 60 - 75 feet, I rest the arm-load of pavers on the wall before trying (with great effort) to reach down over the wall to hand them off to a young black man who is standing in a ditch on the other side of the wall. He needs to stretch up as hard as he can to take the "hand-off" of the paving stones. I repeat this action about three or four times, walking back and forth to the truck each time for a new load when it dawns on me to float-fly in each direction to speed things up. I come to this "labor and time saving decision" right after handing off the forth load, so my hands/arms are empty. As I float-fly back to the truck it hits me. FUCK ME!!! I'm flying! I must be dreaming! WOW, two nights in a row!!!

I immediately abandon the notion of flying back to the truck and fly instead on the far side of the retaining wall and follow the ditch to see where all the stone is being put - principally out of curiosity and because I have no other plan for this lucid dream - having been caught by surprise. I come upon a house that looks like a cross between the White House and your average colonial home. Very upscale and nice. I enter (in the normal way) through the front door and wander around. Most rooms are entirely empty of furniture and initially encounter no dream characters whatsoever. In fact, the house gives the impression that it is an unoccupied new construction. I'm just about ready to leave to find something fun or interesting to do and discover I'm a bit confused as to how to find the door out (or any door for that matter) when I enter a room with two college age women sitting cross legged on a wooden floor - no rug or chair.

I say hello and they actually introduce themselves to me by name! They are pretty and smart, and my first thought is that they could be sorority sister pledges and maybe this home is going to be a sorority house - or perhaps I'm on a college campus. Both girls are fully and fashionably clothed, and far too smart and aloof to try and coax to do anything sexual...besides, one I could handle, but two?? Wouldn't know where to start, and they just aren't "that kind" of girl. So, I ask them to please indicate a way out or to please escort me out of the house. Neither gets up, but they each start to talk over the other giving me directions. I thank them, but the conflicting and confusing instructions fail to get me to an exterior door. I start to feel trapped and frustrated - and I wake.

I begin looking out to the right window of my bedroom at the neighbor's house. The entire side is an intense, shining blue stained glass, resembling church in many ways. I do a double take, and something feels very strange and familiar about this state. I realize I'm dreaming and begin stand up and walk toward the window. I jump out, but my visuals go white. I stay in this white void area for several minutes, rubbing my hands and reminding myself I'm in a dream. I try intently to wait until the next dream scene starts. After several minutes, I wake up.

Since my last journal entry I have had very bad recall and been very busy with the start of school on top of that so I took a little break to figure out my new schedule. This morning I woke up and realized it was a good time to get started again and did MILD.

09.08.2016
12:00 PM

Hanging Out With Juliana (MILD)

I am Supermans side kick or something. We are fighting Lex Luthor I think. There is an old lady crossing the street and Superman says to help her while he fights. I go and fly her across the street to her hotel and help her find her room. I get a sense that this is a dream and wonder if I will become full lucid. I finish walking her down the hall just to make sure I feel I finished that dream plot and do a nose plug. I think specifically about how I shouldn't fly out to superman and continue the fighting. I fly out the window and fly around Hollywood. I land and find myself in front of a 5 story building. I remember my goal is to just have a nice talk with Juliana so I stick my hand back. I feel her grab mine but it takes some focus to make it feel vivid. I say hi twice and then she responds. I look back and this time she has a buzz cut! It looks pretty good actually. She and I start walking and talking into the building and I say, "Wait. Every time I see you we start walking somewhere urgently. We don't have to go anywhere today let's just hang out and talk." "Okay, but lets go right inside here and sit down." She says.

We go in and it's a hospital. We go in one of the rooms and sit on the bed. There is another patient in the bed next to us but they don't mind. I find on a table two giant delicious chocolate chip cookies and we each take one. It is really good! I say to her, "Could you show me more of your magic. Like something flashy and cool like the fireworks from last time." She says, "Sure!" and snaps her fingers and there is a bright blue flash surrounding her hand. "Cool!" I say. "How about something even more creative! What else can you do?" She says, "Okay. Look at that trash can." She points at it and a spark flys from her finger and into it. Two eyes and a mouth emerge from the front of the trash can and it starts talking in jiberish! "Cool! What happens if you make it inanimate again? Let me try." I have finished my cookie and stick out my finger to give it a try. The garbage can looks scared and pretends to be normal but I can tell it is just faking. "Here." Juliana says and sends another spark that makes it go back to normal. I start to destabilize and wake up or have an FA, I don't know, but I DEILD.

I am in the loby of a hotel and skateboard out the door. Strange, I don't know how to skateboard well. I skateboard and follow someone on a bike. We fall into a pool and people try to help us out and I destabilize again.

I am in a residential neighborhood and very unstable still. I walk up to a car and feel it. There are flowers growing out of the engine. I am stabilized now and decide to summon Juliana again. This time she has a brown pixie cut. It is much easier to summon her this time. We go for a walk and talk. "Do you know Androx?" She starts to think. "He is a talking cat, or a witch or something." She says she thinks she knows who I'm talking about and that it isn't supprising he found me. I say he sent me to fight evil witches and she starts laughing. "What? Are you an evil witch?" "No it's not that I just don't think there is such a clear line between good witches and evil witches. It just dosn't work that way in my opinion." "So you arn't a good witch?" She shrugs. "Well I guess you are a neutral witch then and I am okay with that.", I say. We pass by some people who are playing music loud. It is like metal mixed with drum and bass. As we walk away Juliana uses magic to make it louder. At the drop we can't help but start dancing to it. We can't really tell if we should be head banging or dancing like its electronic. haha I eventually wake up and decided to write this down before I forget it.

I keep falling asleep though and eventually have a dream that I am Purple Man's pawn like in Jessica Jones.

08.09.2016

(DEILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID
I caught myself waking up from a dream. I laid still without intending to and then I realized I could try DEILD. I continued to hold still and SP/HHs set in. It was just a light buzz and small vibrations. I tried to stand up but I couldn't.

I imagined laying in my dream bed and then got up. I fell a short distance from my bed while getting up as if my bed was taller. I walked through my door but everything was dark. I reminded myself to link the dream with DEILD in case I woke up. I wondered if my alarm would wake me up soon, and it made me too aware of my waking body. The dream started destabilizing but I held on by putting my hands on the roof. I then realized I was in the staircase of my old house, a spiral staircase. I tried to stabilize by rubbing my hands but the dream crashed. I held still and felt SP again.

I then started hearing one of my profs lecturing.
I assumed I had fallen asleep and had a LD in the middle of the lecture. I raised my head and sure enough I was in the middle of a lecture, and didn't bother doing a reality check.

This was a pretty good night. Despite waking up in the early morning and having trouble falling asleep after the WBTB, I eventually did and had some dreams. I'm a bit confused about the two first dreams as they happen in the same place and I don't recall the order of events, but I know I became lucid after one of those fragments. I also suspect that I dreamed about my grandmother's apartment because I visualized myself getting lucid in there during my WBTB (I had two, one in which I didn't become lucid, perphaps because the wbtb was too short and another one in the early morning which is when I had these dreams).

Birthday Party:

In this fragment, I was in my grandmother's appartment and some guests arrived. I think they were supposed to be my brother's friends, tough I've never seen them before. After that there was a birthday party (I think my brother's) and it was pretty grand. They showed a video on a huge TV of a bunch of people that were there on the party with slow, emotional music. Then it started showing people that were outside the appartment. The first one was a couple (one of my friends and some girl I don't know) having a romantic time on the roof at night, smiling at the camera. At this time I was kinda confused, asking myself if my grandparents set up cameras everywhere on the building. It showed even people that were outside the building, on the streets! At this time I started thinking it was a bit creepy and perhaps illegal and was hoping they hadn't filmed me when I was in the bedroom wearing only shorts (before I got ready for the party). Something else might have happened, but I can't remember much aside from small fuzzy details about this fragment.

Incendiary Mouse:

I am unsure if this is the same dream, it might have happened after or before the above one. I was again in my grandma's apartment, but this time theere weren't any guests, just the usual people. I was in the living room, I remember my uncle being there doing something and maybe my grandma. I made my way to the kitchen, which is connected to the living room and when I got there I saw a mouse and began to freak out, thinking if I should kill it or call someone. I decided to run back and tell my uncle about it, but the mouse ran past me into the living room. It then ran outside the appartment (there's a door that goes out of the living room into a tiny space usually used for storing stuff, there is a grate there that leads outside the appartment and into a hall which is usually closed). My uncle followed it and tried to stomp it. While he was trying to kill it, I closed the door to make sure it didn't get back in.

Not sure exactly what happened here, I think I went into another room and when I came back into the living room my uncle was holding a cat and then put it down. I guessed he was going to try to use the cat to hunt the mouse, and eventually the mouse appeared and the cat caught it and killed it. Instead of blood, some transparent liquid with a very slight red color to it dripped from it and started forming a pool. The cat walked on the liquid and started spreading it everywhere, making a mess (meanwhile I was kinda freaking out because I found the scene disgusting). For some reason... the cat's pawns started catching on fire and I started freaking out even more. I figured this liquid could heat up things and start fires. Small fires appeared in other places where the liquid touched, but they didn't last long. I remember there was a child crying (no idea who that child was) because she got some of that liquid in her face. While trying to help her, she got some on me and my skin started to burn. I told her to go to the bathroom wash her face. Again, the details are a bit fuzzy but this is the last I remember of this dream.

Mirror Teleportation (Lucid)

Eventually after the events of one of those dreams (at least I think this lucid is connected to one of them), I found myself wandering to my grandfather's bedroom and thinking about something that confused me. I don't remember exactly what it was, just that it was kinda bothering me. After thinking for a bit and mumbling to myself, I remember thinking "... the only explanation to that would be... oh, of course.". As I realized I was dreaming, I smiled while I tought about how my RCs during the day and MILD during the WBTBs helped me carry my awareness into the dream. I felt pretty smart at that time too for realizing I was dreaming.

I tought about what to do, saw a big mirror and tought "Ah, why not?". By the way, I have always struggled with entering mirrors in dreams. I have tried a few times and failed. However, this time I was feeling pretty confident for some reason and just did it. At first, there was resistance, but I kinda felt it giving away and eventually went through it. The best way I can describe the feeling is like this: try to imagine yourself pushing your finger into some plastic wrap. Eventually your finger will tear it apart, but in this case I went through the mirror without tearing it, as if I was entering some liquid with a high density. When I got through, I found myself in a mirrored version of the same room, except with some furniture missing. I quickly realised I went through the mirror without a destination in mind, so I tried coming up with something. The first thing I tought about, for some reason, was meeting a cartoon character called Star. With that in mind, I went through the same mirror I came in through and ended in some kind of office.

I was walking around, looking for Star and asking people about her. Apparently she had a pretty important position in the office, like a boss or something (which is pretty off-character for her) and people were trying to get a hold of her. Eventually I met her, altough I don't remember anything that we talked about. I remember some witch chasing us through a hall (which looked like the school I went to) and I was trying to find her wand, by sticking my hand inside bags (not opening them up, just straight-up phasing my hand inside then, apparently that's a good way to conjure stuff up) but none of the wands that I found were right. We managed to escape eventually and I remembered another goal that I had, which was to visit a place I created in waking life and I told Star I had to go because I had some stuff to do. I woke up when I entered a mirror.

I tried my best not to move and to calm down as I woke up (I don't think this was an FA, but it might have been). I felt some weird sensations similar to numbness and eventually found myself in my dream again, this time in a huge shopping mall. The first thing that came to me was... looking for porn. I wasn't particularly horny, I think I was just curious to see what I would find. I began looking around for the porn section (kinda like some rental stores have adult sections) and started asking some employees. The first one was a woman who grabbed my hand and yelled "Teleport!", teleporting me to someone else (I don't know how to describe the feeling of being teleported... but the way she teleported was kinda like the "instant transmission" from Dragon Ball) who could help me find it. The other employee grabbed me by my hand and started leading me around, altough to be honest he didn't seem so sure about where it was. I yelled "Teleport!" and he teleported just like that woman. After walking around for a bit I realized that I was wasting time looking at porn while I could be going to the place I created. I entered a small shop which had some mirrors and entered one of them. The place I wanted to go was a big, sorta japanese-oriented house that almost looked like a big japanese shrine, which a big frontyard, so as I entered the mirror I tought about the frontyard's grass.

As I went through the mirror I found myself at a huge, grassy frontyard and became excited, until I realized I was in front of some manor/mansion at night (in retrospect, it looked a lot like the white house, maybe a bit bigger). I turned back and saw two people on a table (I think they Barney and Ted from "How I Met Your Mother") talking about something. I ignored them and welp up some stairs leading to a big glass door which ressembles the one at the entrance of the building where my grandparents live. I went into the glass door as I did with the mirrors (I guess anything with a reflection will do) and ended up in another backyard, altough this one looked unkept and was behind an old wooden house I could see in the distance. I tought "Alright, I'll try one more time..." and went back into the mirror, maybe going to one more place which I can't remember and eventually the dream faded away. I tried getting back into the dream but I felt that I was too awake to go back.

This was a pretty cool night and I feel like I'm getting more and more lucid dreams! The MILD method has really been helping a lot when I do it right, altough I think I should start doing longer WBTB's because these days, whenever I go back to bad during a WBTB, I'm still really sleepy, like at the point where I can barely keep my eyes open. However, I have no idea how to keep myself occupied during the WBTB and fear that I won't be able to sleep if I stay up too long (which in turn will result in me laying in bed, tossing around until morning trying to sleep, which I REALLY don't want). Guess I'll start measuring how much time I stay up and trying to increment it a little by little. I also learned how to use mirrors and another way to summon objects, which is pretty cool.

Last night bed 12 am - 6:33 am
2x300 Alpha GPS 6:33 am
2.4 Galantamine (pure) 7:37 am
Sofa 7:37 am

So my cat decides to groom himself for 20 min while sitting on my legs. He left, I went potty at 8:15. Was still not sleepy enough. Tried to sleep on my right, couldn't fall asleep. Then straight, where I was starting to get some visuals like faces and a small movie of a tiny dog.

About 45 min long lucid with a few breaks when I realized I am still dreaming and felt the back of my head tingle

Turned to left side and I finally got into a LD. Not sure how it started. This will be in no particular order.

I'm in a darkish hallway, all tiles, like a hospital. I remember the TV TOTM and I start to look for one. There is many monitors, but more like computers. They show data and stats. I look at many of them. So no TOTM : (

I walk through many building and rooms, looking for a way to get out, and for doors to find somethink interesting behind them.

Then I am outside a lot, walking through streets, looking at houses and picking a right one to go inside and explore.

I normally don't like to be inside, but I remembered that and I made an effort to look into doors despite of that to get over my fear.

I'm sitting outside, at night. Snow is all around us and nearby is a partially frozen ocean with lots of iceflow and icebergs. We all look up at the skies and they are beautiful. I ask out loud, how come there is so many stars, lot more than normally.Then I realize those are not stars, but frozen Canadian landscape with lots of snow and lakes as seen from the airplane. At that moment I realize I'm dreaming, look at my hands and fingers are all stubby. I smile and walk away.

I walk into a small room in a small village house. It's all made from snow. I look back to get out, but there is no more door. All snow. Everytime I look, the room is smaller. I figure i teleport from there by turning. I do that, get a bit dizzy and I stumble. I think I should close my eyes. When i open them, I am still there, only room is smaller. Now there are 2 small holes in the snow wall and I punch it bigger and get out.

I'm in a large road tunnel. I look through a round hole in the wall and see entity approaching. Looks like flowing black smoke. I yell at 2 kids with 2 dogs to hurry up to me to safety so we can close the door. I can tell the kids are too slow, and girl realizes it too. So she throws a yellow tennis ball towards me, her dog runs to it and he almost gets to safety, but ball bounces back and dog follows it. Girl gets sad and disappointed and I have no choice but to shut the door after i yell at them some more to hurry up, they can make it.

I'm on a street in my old town and I realize I forgot about that street all together. It gives me bad vibes so I get away.

Still in some large tunnels or corridors, I see a DC and I rejoice. I wanted to talk to one so bad. It's a guy but when i get closer it changes into a man. Tall blonde hair. I start a convo.

Same underground and then houses outside - lots of sex.

I remembered my lucid goal to look at my body. I look at my hands, my arms, and it's like waking life. Same shapes, colors, hair, freckles. My vision is getting dark and yell out wait, I wanted to see rest of my body. I lift my same blue shirt just as I practiced before bed and I see my stomach and bottoms of my boobs, same as when I practiced. I quickly drop my undies before it all goes dark.

I felt funny. This was definitely a dream. I was in a huge empty room with white walls and plain grey pillars. There was a ledge, and on top I noticed a woman. "It's M," I thought, attempting to make her appear. And it actually worked, it was her. She climbed down from the ladder. Her hair was long and wavy, a shade of reddish brown. She was wearing a white top and light blue pants. Desperately, I asked her, "WHAT DOES THE DREAM MEAN?!?" She replied with, "Re-birth." I said, "WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??" and she replied with something I don't remember, but I didn't understand her answer at all. I looked down and noticed she was pregnant. She said one more thing that I don't remember and then I lost the dream. I then had sleep paralysis. I tried to move but couldn't, but remained calm because I knew what this was. So I just kind of laid there until I was able to wake myself up.

Notes: Well, Okay. This is the closest I've come in years, so I suppose that's progress. But what does "re-birth" mean? And was that really M? She was pregnant so that doesn't really make sense.
I want to try again in my next lucid, but this time go to the actual place of the dream, my old home, on my driveway.

I was in my aunt's house and this lady was super angry with me because she thought I did something(like disrespect her dead husband or something). As more time went by, she started getting furious. She started taking my things, my phone, my clothes, and putting them in the room where she was. She was turning evil, and it was freaking me the fuck out. So I ran out of there, down the street. I saw a sketchy looking guy and said, "PLEASE, CAN I BORROW YOUR PHONE? I NEED TO CALL 911 RIGHT NOW" and he gave me a weird look, said "sure" and thew his phone at me. It was a Samsung and I had no idea how to use it(things are difficult in dreams, okay?) I realized that he had stolen the phone and was trying to get rid of it, so I didn't touch it. I kept running until I saw a man, Hurley from Lost, in a convenience store. I said, "CAN I BORROW YOUR PHONE??" and at first he said no, so I said, "PLEASE, I NEED TO CALL 911. YOU CAN EVEN DIAL IT FOR ME" So he dials 911 but lets me press "call" and at first I hear static, then a woman's voice. "HELLO?" I say, my voice shaking and scared. She says something like, "It's okay. I understand what you are going through. You'll be okay through this." Like what? I didn't even tell her my problem! So anyhow, I told her but then woke up.

Bed around 10 after listening to Dream Yoga audio for 20mins and fall asleep with mantra's like - ' Tonight I lucid dream' and similar

Woke up around 12.30 with first dream and then stayed awake for ages - did my best to keep mind focusing regularly on dream stuff...finally fell asleep

Wake around 4.50am sit up and listen to Daniel Love's Wbtb audio for my Wbtb.
Lay down with the audio finishing probably around 5.10am

Get lucid with dild some time between 5.30 and 7am - I am pretty sure I get lucid while walking down the road .... I am remembering things and looking at where I am thinking
' is this for real?...Could I be dreaming?' ...it felt very much like real life but I dare to test the surroundings by pushing my hand through wall a wall I am walking next to - it softly and gently pushes it's way through the wall like putty - great " I am dreaming!'
I carry on within the dream frame and speak to one the the DC's about this being a dream- I look around and see I am at a large depo/bus stop,lots of folk waiting for different buses. Remembering the task I move close to a middle age lady - I tell her I am about to come into her body and see what it feels like and she could switch to mine...she is a bit defensive and not up for it initially- I carry on and move into her body. I can sense her agitation as I feel how it feels in her shoes. After the initial awkwardness she relaxes and seems to move out or relax enough for me to get comfortable in there

I am sure I am in her body but struck with how comfortable it is ...it's still me ...I am not sure if she went into my body or not as I look around for my body I can't see it. I get on the bus when it comes and soon move on with my lucid

Does that mean the task is done or not?

Ok I am sitting lucid on the train and remember the ' grow a tail ' task. I tell the gentleman next to me that I am about to grow a tail for the totm. He is intruiged and watches my back side in anticipation

. I put my hand there and feel around - I am aware I havnt manifested anything like this before in a lucid so it's gonna be good - I am excited! I keep my hand just above my butt on my lower back feeling for movement ...Yes! I feel movement from within

- soon a little stub of a tail grows out! I start to laugh and show the man - he is as surprised as me and we both watch as it keeps growing until it's about half a meter long...it's thin and grissely but it's deffinatelly a tail - I am delighted.

I stay on the train for a while - I am laying down on a seat and pushing first my hand, then my feet into the wall - pushing gently in and out sometimes pulling the structure of the wall out and playing with with it reminding myself this is a dream - my dream - test myself see the surroundings and test them - I do this by walking into and through walls etc as I mentioned.

I am sure I awoke a few times and Dield back in gently - there was more but I dont remember all - just know it was awesome to be aware in my dreams again!