nightmare

My husband was about to throw away a box of chocolates my mom brought. "No, these chocolates are my favorites!" I objected and stopped him.

BLACK: Regular
BLUE: Dream
RED: Notes
PURPLE: Quote (specific words I remember clearly)
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I'm not quite sure how this dream started or ended.
Date: November 30th, 2013
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I was in a hospital [ it looked like one I'd been in before ]. It was quiet, which made me feel very uncomfortable. It didn't seem right. A man [ He appeared to be in his early/mid 20's and had brown hair, young face, was tall, thin, and had dark eyes. He seemed very familiar ] grabbed my arm and pulled me away from where I was. He mentioned something to a woman by me [ I believe she was a nurse like figure, but I'm not sure ] about "finding all the pretty girls in the hospital and raping the f-ck out of them." [ I don't think he thought that I'd heard him. That, or he didn't care if I did or not. ] I began feeling incredibly nervous, but I hid it to the best of my ability. We passed my family [ always female members from my mother's side or my father. None of them ever noticed me, save my father. He glanced at me but said and did nothing ] two times. Some time along the way I mentioned something about "not wanting to be treated this way again." The man looked at me and we sat on some stairs [ the "nurse" woman stood off the the side. The stairs were hard stone ] and he asked me, "You've been raped before?" [ those words rang in my head over and over when I woke up ] I mentioned something about being a virgin but that I'd been sexually abused in the past [ this is true. I have been ]. He raised his eyebrow and almost seemed to feel sorry for me. I thought he'd let me go. Suddenly, he pulled me to my feel and literally dragged me to a room [ more details on the room below ] that looked like both a physical therapy facility and an x-ray/CT scan room. He had the nurse take me to a machine on the far right side of the room. I faced the closed end of it. The man said "We're making sure you won't get pregnant. STAND STILL!" I was shaking violently by this point. I was scared. He had the nurse woman spread my arms out and made me stand holding some bars on either side of me. After this, the man literally growled and tore me away from the machine. He took of my jacket [ it was red ] , leaving me in my tank top [ grey ], jeans, and socks. I noticed my dad outside the room and I told the nurse to shut the door. She did this. The man pushed me onto my back [ I landed on another machine that was on the floor. I hit my back on two bars ] and I crossed my legs over each other and put my arms over my chest. I started pleading with him. "Please, please don't!" I cried over and over [ I was literally crying ]. The man towered over me and he ripped his shirt off and started trying to take my clothes off. I kicked at him and screamed repeatedly. Eventually, I think, I got so afraid that I just woke up. The ending is blurry.
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NOTES:
About the room-
It was on the top floor in the west side of the building. The sun was setting outside the single window which had blinds over it. The room was cold. The colors were desaturated, but there was blue and white all around me -ironically my school colors-. There were various "machines" strewn about. The door that I saw my dad out of was on the right side of the room right next to the machine I stood by. The door was a flimsy plywood sliding door that had no lock. The only light in the room came from that one window. It was dark-ish

Various notes-
I remember that I didn't scream for my dad's help because I didn't want him to see me so vulnerable. I would rather be raped than have him see me like that.

No one seemed to notice what the man was saying. The nurse never spoke or made any noise.

The man was very familiar and was rough, then gentle, then rough.

My dad looked through me when he gazed my way.

All I could think about when I woke up was the mysterious man who'd made me do something sexual (no details because I don't want to say it) when I was 5 years old.

Around the time I started to faze out from the dream, I remember that the man looked animalistic. He also started to "melt." His image literally just began to melt.

I remember my dad (after the whole ordeal, probably) saying something like "Oh I never wanted this to happen again. It's like 10 years ago."


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If you can offer any help here, I'd appreciate it. This dream hits home in too many ways. I've had more and more dreams like this one, lately, It's as though my subconscious is trying to make me see something.

11.12.2013

Random Gun Fire Kills Children in Sporadic Intervals (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

When I became lucid, it’s in a dream setting similar to a school cafeteria. It's completely different from the pre-existing models my mind usually utilizes. The flooring has the basic bland light gray colored tiling with black tar/rubbery-like substances between the creases.

It's either morning or early afternoon, and there's a lot of individuals in their own groups. Two distinct groups where the ones that seemed to be Hispanic. For some weird reason, I had some predisposition into thinking they could be two gangs that have turmoil between each other.

It seemed pretty normal in the sense of a school having individuals desperately trying to find an identity for themselves through gregarious activities with peers to have some illusory perception that there could actually be sustainable bonding. And I happened to be in the middle passively acknowledging their existence.

I hear abrupt and short bursts of gun fire to the left, and I immediately turn in that direction to see the group to the left of me panicking and crowding around someone that may have been shot. Naturally, I get up to see what actually happened.

There's a man who seems to be close to descending into a crying fit as he's holding a dead child in his arms. I can't really describe the details of how the dead child look because it was too disgusting to even contemplate on it.

There's blood streaming through the child's face in several directions, almost as if there's some kind of radial streak originating somewhere along their chest. The group seems to be in a longer state of shock, and I didn't pay attention to what was going on with the group to the right of me.


For some reason I wanted to confirm that this actually just happened, that a child just randomly dies due to gun fire that was very difficult to confirm where the origin was. Seeing how there were walls surrounding the building, the only presumption that can be made is that the bullets can somehow pass through walls and people and solidify until it meets whatever target the shooter wants.


After looking at the child and the man who seems to be at his nadir, I presumed he was either the father, or some kind of relative to the child. Then I noticed most individuals here seems to be around my age or even older, and it felt weird with them existing in a school that would seem to be formatted for Middle School and High School.

I don't know where I'm headed, but I just wanted to get out immediately because of my current attachment to the high state of paranoia of who would be next.

This next environment seems to be an expanded version of the previous one, and the next attack seemed to have been initiated diagonally to the right. I'm sitting with a dream character that was a counterpart of the waking life individual I talked with in High School mostly though lunch period.

Although his existence didn't really seem to matter much, though for the sake of just getting some descriptions down:

• He was wearing a bland gray shirt, dark blue jeans, and his usual messy hairstyle

• His body composition emulated gestures that seemed as if bad was going to happen, though I'm not sure why I'm led to believe this

Most of my attention was on the right section of the dream environment, and I seemed to have some restriction to turn to the left. Maybe it's because I felt something bad would happen in the direction I'm paying attention to the most, or it's something else entirely that I wasn't aware of.


Then more gun fire comes in randomly, and everyone starts screaming. I get up immediately, and the person to the right of me gets up and seems to be shifting his head left and right frantically trying to find where the shot came from.

Turns out it's another child that died, though I didn't bother to take that into consideration seeing how I ended up bringing out the neurotic state again. Since the attack came from afar, I didn't bother paying attention into looking at the child.

Because at the point, if I came in to see what would happen, I would be questioning why I would want to make the attempt to go there and confirm whatever visualizations would show up of the late child's body. And like the previous event, I get out like everyone else eventually did.

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11.12.2013

Running a Mile in 4:30 (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Guess DILDs are my frequent means of reaching lucidity. That's glad to know considering how haven't done any WBTB lately, and the fact that I was sleeping late and waking up fairly late as well.

The environment looks exactly like the middle school I used to go to, except there some weird atmospheric overlay of brown, orange, and other warm colors. It seemed it was close to night time, but the sunset managed to sustain its existence for a pretty long time.


The conditions of the dream with the environment, and where I was placed with other dream characters and other factors such led me to believe there was going to be a mile run. I can't recall when the coach blew the whistle, but I proceeded to run at the same time everyone did.

I seemed to have realized my legs wouldn't tire out, though I seemed to have been experiencing psychosomatic processes where I felt like I was tired after running fast from the start. The dream shifts to where now I have to go around a huge ring where there was a large field of grass in the middle.

However, it wasn't necessary to go around this circle. All I needed to do was get to the middle, and then turn around and dash all the way back to the start, and then turn to the right to the next new outer ring. I was stumbling a bit in my movements, but then a random image somehow gave me a jolt of energy.

Out of all the imagery that could show up to emit some kind of emotional response, Shanks from One Piece shows up and fades away. It was a younger version of him smiling while wearing a straw hat, at least younger than the current version that looks like he's in his late 30s or something.

Either that was some weird reference on how Luffy has a long-term goal of eventually meeting Shanks when he becomes more powerful, or just a random image altogether.

Anyway, deus ex machina kicks in and I'm running very fast. So fast that I'm already close to finishing the mile run and I'm already by the large gates that I have to go outside the edges. I then get the urge to propel myself to run even faster and finally reached the end.

The coach looks like exactly like the waking life counterpart that seemed to be in his late twenties. He was wearing a dark blue polo shirt along with dark gray sports shorts. He checked his stopwatch and stated that I finished the mile in 4 minutes and 30 seconds.


Clearly something I never was able to do during middle school or even in my current state.

The dream shifts to where I'm heading somewhere holding a cellphone and calling someone. I don't know who it was, but based on how I felt and communicated with them, it was someone really close. Though that's pretty vague seeing how it could be anyone really. I told them how I managed to finish a mile in 4:30, and by that time it was night time.

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11.12.2013

Messy Apartment and the Realism Distracts Me From Dream Logic (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I'm in an apartment that resembles the one when I was in College Station, and it seems my father was on his way over there. I didn't know how much time I actually had, but with the situation I'm in now in the dream, my apartment was a horrible mess.

Everything here felt so real to the point where I really started to get distracted. I tried formulating ways to clean up this mess before actually doing so, but I barely got anything done. Then the dream shifts to where I meet an individual in waking life that I'll just abbreviate as Jas.

Jas seemed to be close to this area for some reason in order for me to interact with him so easily. He looked exactly like his waking life counterpart, probably to near perfection. His expression and his fairly passive demeanor to twist his words a bit to make himself look better seems to be there, but that could just be my conceptual schemes playing out within this dream.

He seemed more casual, and even friendlier than he is in waking life. It was almost as if I was a very close friend of his within this dream. I was getting something out of a Jeep Blazer vehicle, and I seemed to ignore the fact that I owned a vehicle for once as well.


Jas was stating something, and I interrupted him with a joke since how what he was saying was going to end up awkward and weird. I forgot what I actually took out, but I went back to the apartment only to go back to square one on what to do with the messy apartment.

Sometimes I wonder if it was an error in perception on the apartment being messy, and instead it I was probably confused on how there were so many objects in front of me that were most likely organized in a weird fashion.

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11.12.2013

Relative Catches Me Late at Night (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I'm just going to be lazy and give a brief overview of what happened:

• It's night time in the dream
• I wanted to get out of the house that I was in for reasons I can't recall
• My relative wanted to get out, but he wasn't aware that I was outside for a few seconds
• I ended up walking into his direction, and he's surprised on how I was able to get out
• I go back into the house

I'm hoping someone can help me? last night i had a terrifying dream. It was more so this morning, my boyfriend got up early to go to work and i said bye then i led there for about 5 minutes, and even though i cant remember it, i must have fallen asleep. At this point, even though it was getting light outside, the room went completely black, and i was led in my bed, everything looked the same, but then i started uncontrolabely spinning, i can't really make out whether or not it if it was me that was spinning, or the room, or the bed but i'm almost certain it was me/my head. anyway i was spinning and i was slowly rising up and there was a piece of plastic under my head, even though i was led facing the ceiling i suddenly had a quick side angle of what was happening and just remember seeing plastic under my head, i think i was slightly hovering above my bed and i could slightly lift my head, i was trying all i could to shout for help as whilst i was spinning i could swear i could see a woman standing really close to be but it was blurred where i was spinning so fast, i was crying and screaming but nothing would come out.. then i remember my words were finally able to come out i was saying oh my god oh my god and i was able to speak and then i woke up.. It wasn't nice, it felt like someone was going to hurt me, i was really scared and in my dream i remember thinking that i was going to die, this dream only lasted for a few minutes (i think) it seemed to be very quick. Please someone help me with this? xx

By the way, i just wanted to say i have never experienced anything like this before, although a few weeks ago i did wake up in the middle of the night and i thought my boyfriend waas standing in the corner of the room but then i realised he was next to me and the shadown faded away, i never thought anything of it until now as i thoiught i was seeing things, (which i probably am)

Fragment: Football.

I am playing football. (Strange b/c I don't even know the rules of football in RL.) We are about to score a touchdown when the other team starts cheating. I don't see how they are cheating at first, but then realize that some of the players on the other team are "football robots".

Fragment: Random

I am feeding ducks cheese bugles. (SERIOUSLY, BRAIN, WHAT THE HECK!?!?!!?) One of the ducks tries to fly away, but I think gets shot by a hunter. The other one starts barfing the cheese bugles back up next to me. They are much bigger and covered in ... duck spit? I don't want to eat them, even though the duck seems to be offering them to me.

Lucid Nightmare: Dentist in math class

I am in my math class. At least two other kids are talking about an assignment, and the teacher is pestering me about something. Eventually she stops and I get ready to sit down, but a dentist comes in and tells me I must have a dental operation.
A large dentist chair complete with instruments appears at the front of the class. The dentist sort of forces me to lay down and leather restraints go onto my arms. The dentist explains that I must have my braces augmented then he will use a laser to kill germs on my teeth.
We cut straight to the laser part. The laser comes down from the ceiling on this robotic arm. The projector is a chrome cone like device. (Another cool sci-fi design) The laser beam itself was actually a purple color. I get to somehow watch as the dentist uses the laser to clean cavities on the inside of my own mouth. But he seems to be making mistakes and having the laser hit my gums. This hurts. A lot.
Eventually, he gets done with the laser. He says he is going to start pulling bad teeth out. He gets a rather intimidating set of pliers and pulls out one or two teeth. This hurts. Even more. He keeps pulling teeth out, and I can feel the inside of my mouth. I'm trying to figure out what teeth he's pulling.
Okay, this has gone far enough. Somehow one of my hands gets free of the restraints and i do a nose plug RC.
I'm lucid, but the dream is really unstable. Heck, I can feel my arm in two places at once, pinching my nose, and sitting by the side of my body under a blanket.
Nevertheless, this dentist doesn't seem to like the fact I've become lucid. He begins to wake me up by casting a magical spell from his hand. I want him to stop (for obvious reasons), I feel for the tray by the side of my chair and grab a handful of dental tools. I'm ready to stab him when I wake up completely.

Here is an excerpt of my dream journal on HealerWagonmaker.wordpress.com...

I went to bed an hour later than usual (11:30pm). A bottle of wine and pizza may have contributed to my state.

I wake up at 3:45am to write:
I am in bed watching an engrossing but creepy documentary. It begins mildly enough, but in the first few minutes it becomes apparent that this is not a pleasant video. There is cerebral violence and profound sadness here. I had put this DVD in to watch while following along with a manuscript, which I had in my hand, and in my own handwriting.

The details of the DVD are hazy now, but there is a lot of strong and dark emotion, and my notes, of course, coincide with that same dark theme. As the DVD plays and I read along intently, Teresa comes in, apparently having been talking to other loved ones outside about me. She is concerned about the content of the DVD and about my state of mind.

I point to a place in the manuscript of significant emotional anguish, and I tell her that I am not ready to let go of these feelings. Besides, I have no choice. It's all here in the script. It's all here in my life. I can't escape it. I realize that the manuscript is my dream journal, and the DVD is a recording of my dreams.

This is a nightmare, the first recalled since I began writing my dream journal. I realize, too, that it is a movie I have seen played before in previous dreams. I am drawn to it. Morbidly riveted, actually.

I want to scream aloud to relieve my soul of the bottled feelings, but in doing so I know it will harm those around me, causing frightful confusion. They would never understand. Teresa leaves the room, sympathetic and understanding. She understands. She always understands. I release a huge silent scream of pain. My spine tingles with ice cold terror. This is a lonely journey, I realize. Sometimes terrifying.

I went to bed like 2.30 or 3 AM and woke up like 9 AM so I tried to practice WILD, I had some big expectations. I started dreaming about some "dream doctor". I was in some kind of small hospital giving a note to my "doctor". I didn't read the note but I knew it said something about my dreams, how many hours i've been sleeping, if it was NREM or REM, etc.. The thing is this doc mentioned something about lucid dreaming and that was when i tried to control the dream. Guess what happened then...

My mom woke me up. I felt kinda disappointed, but anyway, i stayed in bed trying to sleep again... i didnt even thought about it but I should have tried to dream with this doc again, instead i had some weird non lucid dream. I was in my school with a couple of good friends and some kids from this school i haven't seen IRL in more than a year. Anyway, some kid hits another with a table tennis racket in his teeth, and 2 teachers take the first kid and put him in some kind of small glass cage. I start freaking out and say that is illegal and unethical, then something weirder happened. The kid started transforming into a baby crying and the cage became fishbowl and the teachers were there looking at the baby almost drowning. I start to freak out even more and after it i just leave the school and woke up.

Well, the first thing I remember was what I thought was my uncle. (he was my dads friend (My dad is now dead, so I never see that person anymore.) and was a friend to the family.) He was very tall(too tall) and looked extremely like him. We decided to show him around... or town or bunker. We had lived underground, but there were buildings and such. While my brothers, sister (perhaps my mom) were showing him around, I was going to a living room, watching TV. Closing and locking the slide doors on both sides. We had pinball games and more. I felt so relieved, safe and relaxed. But then, somehow things went bad. I believe my "uncle" was actually a zombie. (Aha, I view zombies different.) I think we killed him or sorts. Suddenly, zombies came from everywhere. Now, I was in the middle of the "small town" (which had 4-5 brown buildings.) and we were getting packed and some already in the car to get out. I was getting a couple things packed. Included, my inventory I sell IRL and a cup of ice from a local gasstation IRL. (How did I not become lucid or RC... >.<) Well my sister was getting some more stuff, she waited too long and got bitten. We could see her start lighting a cigar while transforming. (From Walking Dead or something I believe.) While my mom was screaming and crying, my brothers in the front pushed the pedal. We raced, zombies everywhere. Suddenly, I saw other cars. We were saved! Nope. My brother screamed "Now they're getting smart!" Because, somehow, I don't know how, or why, they were zombies. Tons of cars of them trying to be humans. My brother, somehow an amazing racer, raced past them, and we made it out to the light and they were losing where we were. We got to a cliff and a sunset, and my brother said "It must be time for the next game. I remember this." Then he sped, we flew out of the car, as if it was an epilogue or something before a new videogame release. I just remember my brother, I, and a girl flying out. But my mom doesn't come into play with the rest of the story, so we'll just say My brothers and I. (Two brothers.).
So, after the video game credits (not really.) we landing infront of a building. (This is where it becomes foggy.) People started to come, and before we knew it we had to go for a hunt of food with them. We went to a nightmare hell instead that looked like a grocery store. At first I remember, my brother going on a secret side door because he thought they were doing evil things! Nope, they werent. Then, we were collecting food, I remember I got a lot of grains and oats for survivial and then we had to continue on. Then, it was hell. There were tags that if we read it would happen. I read "your worst nightmare will come." and spiders, evil clowns (miniature, size of like toys) Came at me from everywhere. (Our team was split up be now.) so I imagined they couldn't walk, and it happened. (Nope, wasn'[t lucid. FFS.) I found that tag from going up the stairs so I decided not to be an idiot and continue up. I went back to some of the team and the leader, we had a mini attack I believe, and I asked the leader where my brothers were. He answered with this... "(my brother's gamertag for xbox) got eaten by the cookie monster, and (my other brother' gamertag)" ... to be honest, I forgot :/. I think it said he logged off or died. Ahaha. Well that's it. I logged off the game, and woke up.

22.09.2013

Sitting in Lunch and Comparing Electronic Devices (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I had the intention to do a recording of using IamCoder's Halovision plugin for sleeping prior to a WBTB and then after a WBTB. However, since I'm not used to waking up so early after only attempting a WBTB a few weeks ago after months of just focusing solely on reality, wasn't able to get the motivation to move the laptop near the bed.

Made me realize how much sleep is more enjoyable when you stop making a habit where you would prefer to wake up as soon as you hit that tra

I'm in a school cafeteria, and based on how my senses were in the dream, the atmosphere or condition of the dream in general was fairly milky and blurry in some aspects. The tile flooring consisted of a milky violet color with black rubber or colored cement separating each square by maybe half and inch to an inch wide.

It was afternoon within the dream seeing how it was fairly sunny outside by looking through the glass windows. The seating arrangement in the cafeteria consisted of long light gray tables going horizontally in perspective of you looking at this text and light gray circular flat seats supported by a curved J shaped metal attached to the bottom railings of the table.

I noticed that I'm wearing an general outfit similar to a High School get-up I had horrible sense of fashion in. It was a maroon polo-like shirt with black jeans, joes, and a black wind jacket of some sort. I proceed to an empty seat where to the right was an individual that had a long-sleeved shirt under a gray shirt. Sitting down, I take out a random object out of my pocket, and I started having a small conversation with the dream character.

I noticed he was similar to someone in waking life that I used to know a little bit in High School, he had an enthusiastic demeanor. I held the electronic device and noticed it's similar to the Zune HD I had. I wasn't paying too much attention to it, just tilting it in a semi-circular motion and noticed the same dream character was listening to something on what seemed to be an iPod.

29.09.2013

Wake Up! (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I felt someone's fingers touch one of my eyes to try and open it, and I hear a familiar voice.

I decide to pretend that I was sleeping, though it seems the dream character knew I was awake. She decides to say "Wake up!" in a casual tone, and I tilt my head and feigned usual sounds when a person is being bothered in their sleep.

I hear her footsteps trailing away from me, and I hear another female's voice. After things seem quiet, I open up my eyes and I was resting on a white sofa. Its composition was fairly flat and square-like and barely round on the edges. This environment feels very peculiar....too lazy to update on this...

12.10.2013

Lady Spares my life (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Shooting people

Lady almost shoots me but spares my life. Oh, I'm so going to remember this one, hopefully.

• Mutant being with pulsating heart external from its body
• Metal Tank with Spiked Wheels grinding everything up except me
• Coming out with an injured arm
• Hiding from a female and her group of men that apparenty want to kill me
• I try to kill the men, but they just won't die
• Eventually get trapped and I'm held at gunpoint by the lady
• She smiles and walks off without shooting me
• I sit there still looking perplexed on what happened just now
  

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12.10.2013

Metal Tank of Death (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I believe I'm wearing a warm colored dress-shirt, maybe a milky yellow color that's tucked under a gray dress pants. I'm wearing a gray suit as well along with a brown belt with a silver or brass colored buckle in the middle.

My hair is shaved off, and I find myself in a dark area. I don't really pay attention to confirming if I'm dreaming or not, this is just one of those dreams where you decide to get absorbed into the adventure instead of destroying the environment and being confused on what to do next.

the floor consists of milky and faded yellow tile flooring, and there seems to be small hallways, almost built like a maze. I'd presume each hallway was about fifteen to twenty feet wide, and I find myself lurking around the corners.

I have a dark gray gun in my hand, and I can't really make out all the details because there's several yellow lights in random patterns on the ceiling. After walking a bit, I noticed there's a fairly large entity in front of me about twenty feet away.

It looks like a mutant, completely disfigured body composition, and I'm wondering just what it actually is. It seems to have a face, but this face looks like it has been mutilated, and it's hard getting its visage in good detail.

It consists of an dark apricot skin complexion that's stretchy and a bit flaccid in a few areas. It almost looks like it's dead, or just pretending to be dead. I noticed that it's heart was external from its body and was still beating.

The heart had a dark violet color, and was pulsating in a slow but strong frequency. Things shift and there's a metal tank with two cylinder shaped wheels going horizontally that have small spikes on them.

I make a run for it, and the machine grinds up the weird mutant body.

I can't remember what happened next because I wasn't expecting to get a lucid.

17.10.2013

I got an iPhone....wait, just a lucid dream... (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I was taking an hour nap from attempting 71 minutes of image streaming. I did 3 hours of it 2 days ago, and it's amazing how quick things come by in my mind lately.

I'm inside of a house similar to the one I'm currently in, and I go outside and go around the side yard and end up talking to two dream characters. I don't know what I was going to mention to them, and I end up being distracted by the mailman that comes by.

He's an elderly man, but seems to be in pretty peak condition for his age, and he gives me a brown box with my name on it. I go inside the house and open it up and realized I've been given a free iPhone!

Some dream character that looks like a relative of mine started to state that someone merely glued all those pieces together and managed to make the phone look like new. For some reason, this prompted me to realize once more that this is just a dream.

My enthusiasm was sapped, good bye imaginary iPhone!

So when I first recall the dream, I am with a group of my friends about to enter into a house. It looks perfectly normal on the outside: a standard, middle-class American house, painted a medium blue in color and two stories. I am unsure why we are going inside, but I am with my friends so I follow them on in.

Coming inside I find us in what seems to be an exceptionally long hallway with only the way we came in and another door that continues on into the home. My friends quickly run through the next door, leaving me behind. Running to catch up with them, I'm surprised to find that when I follow through the door they are no where in the room, and I come upon a kitchen. It's completely void of life and when I holler for my friends I get no response. Concerned, I turn back around and go back through the door that I had just entered through.

However, to my dismay, I am not back in the hallway. Now I'm in a bathroom and there is a girl sitting on top of the toilet cover, a laptop in her lap as she steadily types away. I'm highly confused at this point and attempt to speak with her, asking her where my friends are, but she seems to blatantly ignore me and continues typing on her keyboard. I leave her to go through the door I entered once more and find myself in yet another room. I am steadily freaking out at this point, quickly running through doors and rooms to try to find my friends and get myself out of that house. Occasionally I come across people but they act as if I do not exist at all and ignore any interaction.

I run quickly through as many doors as I can, and I finally come across a door that looks different, this one painted entirely black as opposed to the plain wooden doors that made up all the others. I reach for the knob and slowly open the door. Just as I open it all the way, an external force in reality awakens me and draws me from the dream.

To start out with, i haven't had anything close to a nightmare for years, so this one is kind of weird. i wasn't one of the characters, i was just watching and couldn't do anything.
There was a group of boy scouts in an abandoned park with at least a mile of wilderness on every side, and the scouts were spending a week there. It was all fine, setting up camp in one of the picnic housing area things, then a kid found a gameboy with a game in that was like tetris mixed with DDR (i don't even know) and the scouts played the game until night time. when it became night, there were loud noises and my vision turned staticy with a red hue.

I woke up.

it was late at night, so when i went back to sleep, i came back to the area and i was one of the scouts, trying to spend the night there. the last thing i remembered about the dream was a wolf or something jumping out and attacking someone . The dream wasn't very scary to me, just more dark than any of the dreams i have had for years.

I'm totally new here. I suffer from a chronic pervasive sleep disorder. Too long of a story for here and now and this place. In any case , yesterday, I finally screamed in my bathroom at the sink. "Why is this house drowning me in negative energy no matter how much I try". i should have known better than to speak it. that night, i dreamed 3 men outside with guns. They are threatening harm, rape, and death. I feel helpless. It was so real I wasn't aware I was dreaming because typically My dreams become lucid as soon as I have passive triggers mostly unrealistic dream events pretty much 3-4 times a week i become conscience. I often then become a passive participant and even kick a** in any way I Please or just enjoy making things up as I go along. i even like to just stay assive and let the dream unfold while I'm completely aware I'm dreaming.

By no means would these intruders on my property in this dream had any power had I become lucid. I would have been a bad B with a samurai sword (in my dream of course) chopping these guys up flying all over the place. But noooo, I'm calling 911 with a woman who seems totally unconcerned and I'm begging away for help. She says help is on the way. Some time passes, banging on my door, more screaming outside. I'm frantically trying to figure out how to protect myself and my child while I wait for help. I dial 911 again pleading. The lady could care less and says she forgot to dispatch help. I wake somewhere in to be greatful I was dreaming.

I fall back to sleep and have this amazing lucid dream I didn't want to wake from where I spent the day with some lover I've never met. He loved me to my soul and I had no anxiety or stress just companionship. I can interpret the 2nd dream easy cake but the first one I still have trouble channeling and changing circumstances when my dreams are too realistic and negative. I'm trying techniques. Even in sleep paralysis. I can't control the circumstances. I left once when I knew it was safe but I was hoping to meet someone and it was just sunny and the streets were empty. I thought awww boring...just decided to go back to my room and lay on top of my sleeping body. Sounds strange to someone who hasn't experienced it but but I've done it many times since Ive been doing this for 20 years since i was 10. I'm just scared to leave the room.

Last time I was on this site I was reading an entry from someone who was saying they were afraid to Lucid Dream in case they couldn't wake themselves up. To me that's not a problem as even before I knew about LDing I could force myself awake when something bad was happening - so I thought id experiment a little.

The other night I was in the middle of a non-lucid dream, and things where getting bad, (This nowadays is where I usually become Lucid and change it.) But on this occasion I wanted to wake myself up differently from normal, no forcing myself awake. Normally I force my eyes open from within the dream and kinda feels like i'm sucking myself out of the dream.

So when shit started going down I tried to find a different way to leave the dream. Now lucid of course, I walked through an alleyway and into a little corner shop style thing. It was dark and dingy and like a little old sweet shop. I spoke to the lady at the counter, a tiny little, very old Chinese lady, looked almost like a witch sort of character. I said to her whilst looking at all the different sweets and stuff lined up on the counter and in jars -

"I need you to give me something that will wake me up."

She took a moment to think and pottered around, and come back with a dark blue sphere shaped sweet. I was well aware that outside the shop was still very hostile and coming closer. The DC handed it over and nodded assertive and reassuringly to me. I popped it into my mouth and swallowed it whole. Instantly my vision went funny, bright colours in a spiralling black tunnel, It felt like I was being pulled backwards through the tunnel head first. Only about three seconds later I was awake on my pillow, slightly shocked, but it worked! How amazing was that!

So yeah I thought that was a pretty cool experiment, and something new to me. Worked just how I wanted it too though and would be interesting to see if that style works on anyone else, (I know most people don't want to wake up from LDs,) but if they did then give it a try or let me know ways you have tried!

Feb. 16, 2003:
I had some dreams I really don't remember,except that they weren't nightmares. Then I had dreams about woods, but they were nice dreams. Then I had a dream about a puppy. It was sort of scary but the end was happy, so it doesn't qualify a nightmare.
Then I had a sort of semi, psuedo-nightmare, but the puppy was still involved... hmm... oh well.

In my dream I was walking through the woods. They were more like deciduous woods, though. Not sure if they were Florida woods at all. I embraced a tall man with light brown hair. I can't remember what color his eyes were, or if they had a color. All I remember is saying "I remember you" and asking him his name. He wouldn't tell me his name

Then there was the dream about the puppy, I don't remember much except that the puppy was going through a temple to save some people, and in the end the puppy managed to save them. It was smallish, sort of like a terrier, with silvery black fur, only it had floppy ears. It was a VERY cute puppy, though.

Then I had a dream I was in a car with J following another car through some sort of theme park, and his brakes gave out. Somehow, though, we made it through that alive, mostly because the guy in front of us used the back end of his own car to slow us down (everything was mostly downhill so we would have kept gaining speed). The guy was NOT pleased that he had to total his car, but... hey... we didn't die.