non-lucid

Morning of June 18, 2018. Monday.



Subliminal awareness of the autosymbolic nature of the waking process begins. My unconscious mind is personified as an unknown female despite the fact my non-lucid dream self does not possess viable access to my unconscious mind at this level of REM sleep. Errors and distortions abound. She is a subliminal thread of my wife Zsuzsanna, of which my non-lucid dream self does not yet possess viable memory of or contact with my current conscious self identity. She has a daughter who literally but subliminally represents our oldest daughter at a younger age.

I am sitting on the floor in a unique erroneous version of the King Street mansion. The house is mirror imaged to its real-life layout, flipped east to west. I am in the downstairs antechamber while the female mostly remains in the living room on the other side of the doorway. She seems annoyed in building a small structure on the floor in about the middle of the living room, mainly from a set of small blocks of different solid colors, mostly blue, yellow, red, and green. They are about the size of baby blocks, but with a feature on all six sides that is like the knobs of a Lego brick, though there are four knobs on each side of each cube in a two by two pattern. A couple times, as the blocks do not fit into each other, stacks of about seven high topple over. There is a row of about eight stacks at various heights. (This is autosymbolism for failure to initiate viable conscious awareness.)

I am puzzled and somewhat annoyed, though not angry, in trying to rebuild the staircase that goes to the second floor (where I had lived in real life though not been since 1990), which supposedly is to be the real staircase. This is an extreme failure of thinking skills as I am solely working with small triangular pieces of wood. The pieces are only about two inches thick. The two stacks I had made this far are only about six inches high in two rows of about eight pieces each. I cannot seem to arrange the pieces in the correct orientation regarding which edge should face upward. I have several together, but they do not display the form of a set of steps. This indicates that my subconscious self is having difficulty in reaching my conscious self identity during the waking process.

Subliminal anticipation of the waking process continues but increases. This is after the subliminal recognition of a staircase being autosymbolism for the waking process despite its miniaturization in a setting that represents the liminal space of the process, the antechamber (what my landlady called a “vestibule” in real life). Vestibular system correlation personifies, which causes my dream to jump to a new setting, though in the same King Street mansion, still mirrored east to west.

I find myself on the second floor. I develop an ambiguous awareness where I start to become partly aware of my married status and erroneously perceive the house, though vaguely, as the Stadcor Street house in Brisbane (where we have not lived in years), though that was only a one-storey house and was nothing like the King Street house. Vestibular system correlation personifies as Glenn, one of our landlords from Stadcor Street. He has never lived in America, but my dream self does not consider this error. I have a vague awareness he is married to my landlady (only vaguely recalled as Zsuzsanna at this point, but this does not trigger the realization of my erroneous associations) even though in reality he had a male partner.

A vague thread of dream state awareness is present at this point, though no threads of viable lucidity. Because of vestibular system correlation personifying as Glenn, who seems very cheerful, I walk through the doorway of the upstairs kitchen, which opens to the porch’s roof. This is from vague recall that a porch can be used to vivify a dream, as it is autosymbolic of a specific level of dream state consciousness of which I had used many times in the past, since early childhood, to vivify my dream or “step into” a more vivid offset dream. This process developed from walking outside by way of the porch’s doorway. Here though, I am somewhat puzzled from being on the roof of the porch, as there is no additional doorway to intensify my dream or trigger viable lucidity (as the option to jump off the roof to fly does not occur to me). Glenn looks up at me from the public sidewalk in front of the house.

“You’ll have to use the catwalk,” he says happily.

I get the impression he had used the so-called catwalk and jumped to the ground from the outer edge of the roof. I study the roof and see a precarious narrow section of wood that is separate from the rest of the roof, which puzzles me. I stand on it, but consider that I cannot get to the rest of the roof (which has some building materials and tools sitting about) even though all I would have to do is step onto it from this supposed catwalk. Even after fifty years, my dream self fails to remember the dream sign of a cat being a “witness” to liminal space and typically near doorways (for the purpose of inducing lucidity in some cases), though the association had been distorted into the word “catwalk” in this case. (No cat is present and my dream self does not think about cats even upon hearing “cat” as part of “catwalk”.) The association with a “cat always landing on its feet” is not present (regarding the vestibular system dynamics of the waking process, which is often a falling sensation, based solely on biology, not “meaning” as “interpreters” falsely propagate).

My dream shifts into a different scenario as a result of considering the nature of the King Street roof (still erroneously associated with the Stadcor Street house) and subliminal anticipation of the falling sensation of the waking process, which does not occur as a result of this shift. Now it is a typical non-lucidly forced “haunting” scenario. I am downstairs again, but this time the setting is an ambiguous composite of the Stadcor Street house and the Cubitis house. I am now more aware of Zsuzsanna as my wife, though it is still not a complete recognition. She still seems to serve the role as landlady.

“How long has…it…been in this house?” I ask her this dramatically, speaking of the haunting, which is mainly nonthreatening. We talk briefly, but I become distracted. I find myself in a dark room with an unknown female. There is talk about ghosts and seeing physical evidence of ghosts in this house. I tell her, “This is the only house I have ever lived in where there is the physical presence of ghosts.” On one level, I know ghosts are not real, but on another level, I have achieved non-lucid dream control and revivification at this point to entertain myself. The old writing desk that Zsuzsanna used to have is present, which results in an increase of thinking skills correlation. Near the opposite side of the desk from where the unknown female is standing, another female slowly appears. It is a ghost. “Can you see her?” I ask the female. She tells me that she cannot see anyone there.

The ghost is a realistic version, as a “real” human, of Velma Dinkley (of the Scooby-Doo franchise), though about twelve years of age. She seems puzzled and very shy and uncertain. “Who are you?” I ask her. “I’m a goddess,” she whispers. I am puzzled and ask her again about five times. Each time, she softly says, “I’m a goddess”. I want to help her come to terms with her death. (This is a vague influence of “Show Yourself” from 2016, seen just prior to sleep, where I expected Travis to hug the ghost of Paul near the end, though he did not). I hug her, place my right hand on the small of her back, and move it up to the middle of her back. As a result, the palm of my hand begins to glow with white light, rays shining into other areas of the room. (I do not recall the association with Zsuzsanna having been born on September 13, though this was exactly one year before “Scooby-Doo” first aired, therefore Velma in this case is a subliminal representation of Zsuzsanna.)

The palm of my right hand continues to glow as I find myself walking south through the Cubitis hallway. I stand in the doorway of the Cubitis southwest bedroom looking into the semidarkness. Several unfamiliar people, both men and women, are sitting on couches that are against the west and north walls. (This is an erroneous setup, as the north wall held the sliding doors of a large closet in reality.) I hold up my right hand and the light spreads into the room somewhat. The others are puzzled. I step through the doorway and wake. (This is a vague association with a security system reading a handprint to allow entry, or, in this case, to exit the dream state.)

---

With this entry, I have attempted to explain the dreaming and waking process as best I could for this dream. (This is difficult in a society where most people have no viable understanding of dreams, many still believing in “interpretation” and “symbolism” in the popular sense, neither of which is real.) The bedroom is a literal thread of final recognition that I am dreaming, and so I choose to wake. The light represents attaining consciousness as a willingness to accept daybreak and intelligence of which only the conscious self possesses in waking life.

---

3221 words
I went to bed pretty early and must have been asleep by 8 or 8:30 P M. There was no annoying noise.

(ZZZ)

Round 1 of dreams. The first time I woke up, I thought I was already on round 3 or 4 of dreams. But I wasn't. I forgot a lot in the beginning. Some, I originally remembered, but after RBFA, didn't re-remember.

I do remember reading from a book. Then these 2 guys were reading from it. "That's total hypnosis," they said, in a critical voice. They both had very white, straight teeth. They started pretending to be holding a magical staff. Apparently, they hypnotized themselves so well that magical staffs materialized in their hands. I think one was red orange with a bulb at the end. They did some other magic that I forgot.

I forgot the other parts of round 1 of dreams. My brain is definitely cloudier lately, and my only guess is that I made a dietary change. Cooking my kale instead of having it raw, due to thyroid concern. I also ate more brown rice the last few days so maybe the carbs are clouding my mind. It might also be stresses or worries of my life situations. I hope my mind becomes clearer again soon.

(ZZZ)

Round 2 of dreams. I remember hang gliding somewhere near some caves. I think we went in the caves, too. There were parts I initially remembered, but couldn't re-remember after RBFA.

I remember a part where I was driving in a parking lot. I some how one wheel fell off to the side, and I was afraid I'd landed it in a ditch. But, I managed to turn the wheel and make it jump back out. That's very dream like but I didn't notice.

Then I got to a black metal gate. Luckily it opened, so I could drive through it. There was a woman there, who I think had a child. I think she was asking for directions but I forgot the detail of that.

Some more stuff happened that I forgot. But I remember we got to the parking lot of the local food store. I remember a big delivery truck was open in the back and delivering a bunch of those 10 gallon jugs of water. My dad was telling someone else that they should buy one directly from the truck driver.

I remember going into the store and getting some things. I was looking for a gallon of water. I forgot what kind. I saw that some were labeled "distilled" and that sounded like a good idea, but it wasn't what I had set out to get. Also the prices were like $2.73. A lot for a gallon of water.

When I was at the register buying everything, a woman told me I wouldn't have enough on my car. 'That's not fair!' I thought. But it turned out I had more than enough. I also had some cash in my wallet. Some fives or singles, and two twenties. One old twenty and one newer one. Since I had more than enough money, I gave the woman the newer twenty dollar bill. She was an older woman.

I let those go to RBFA as well.

(ZZZ)

Round 3 of dreams. My brain was still pretty foggy by the time I woke from these but I got better recall than the last round.

I remember this part where I was filling out some charts. There was a teacher giving instructions, like, "one, up, one, down..." and I would write a number one, then an up arrow, a number one, then a down arrow... I also made a cloud and some other shapes in various boxes. When I zoomed out, it made a graph.

That became a video game. It was a side scroller similar to Mega Man Z X. At first, I was playing on a low level.

Next, I re-started the level. Still on a low level to begin with. Some how there was a glitch and a giant version of one of the regular enemies appeared... But there was another glitch that I had this "spinning top" move that made me take no damage while slowly whittling away at the big beast. Eventually, I defeated it, and gained like a million E X P. It was a big dark blue thing. I was on a slanted level.

I watched myself level up, in amazement. It reminded me of the time I used the 500000 something multiplier for E X P in pokemon myster dungeon. I defeated one Shellos and stood there watching Bulbasaur level up all the way to 99.

My Mega Man Z X character got above level 50. I watched these enhancements rapidly appear on his suit. He got some kind of motorcycle or other vehicle, and an awesome sword.

I think there was something about going up to the clouds. And then arguing with a woman over whether I was allowed to use those powers... I forgot the basis of the argument. But it was something adversarial or antagonistic.

RBFA.

(ZZZ)

Round 4? of dreams.

I remember something about scrambling to find a bowl. I was in the kitchen. We had the clear bowls but then the first one on the stack was dad's white one. I didn't want to use it but I was in a hurry. I think when I looked away and looked back, the bowls had switched position, but I didn't become lucid from that.

I remember being in the big food store near the bank that I go to... To get spinach and kale. I was near the bags of spinach and kale, checking the expiration dates. They seemed different than they would be in waking life, but I didn't get lucid just yet. One said May 34. 'They must have meant to write June 4,' I thought. There was a store clerk I think I remember. The other dates made me take a closer look but I didn't get lucid... Yet!

I remmeber having a dream of flying over a beach. I gradually became lucid during it. I think it was supposed to be like a video game. I was shooting at these green crab-like things from the sky. Before fully realizing it was a dream, I blasted one right before it got to its crab hole. Once I became more lucid, I cast a red heart-shaped body of energy over the crab hole. This was to heal them and make friends instead of destroying them to make enemies. I remember waking up briefly after that and thinking it through. I might have even rolled over to the other side before falling back to sleep. RBFA.

(ZZZ)

Round 5? of dreams.

I remember seeing a woman dressed in a blue uniform. Not like a police officer but just a blue uniform. She was waiting for a ride in front of my house. I remember she sat on this big boulder that's not there in waking life. I felt bad, like maybe she would want a chair. Eventually, a man, also in a blue uniform, pulled up accross the road. He was in a red jeep. She got in and they drove away. I wondered if it was my business anyway, whether or not the woman got a chair to sit in.

I might have had another brief awakening after that, or between others of these dreams. I remember waking up in a dream, as the phone was ringing. It was around the afternoon. 'Wow, I slept in!' I thought. My dad was at the door. "It's a call for you." The caller I D said "Nathaniel Branden". I thought it was my friend from Texas... I already had a phone in my room, so dad didn't have to bring that to my room. Anyway, I think I answered. I must have thought about dream recall somewhere along the line.

I forgot some middle parts of these dreams.

I remember my sister was sad. She had opened a giant cube of chicken bullion and some was sanded off the top. She was sad because someone had already made a thing of chicken broth, so she had opened it for no reason. "Why don't you just make another thing of chicken broth, and freeze it?" I suggested. I remember the pot of chicken broth was on the top shelf in a cabinet. I also remember drinking a cup and chewing on some carrots and other vegetables. It tasted good.

In these next parts the context was that I was sleeping at my nana's. My mom and dad lived in nana's room. So did my sister and I. I had a mattress on the floor near her fire place. There were lots of other guests staying in the house. J R and C were living in the red room. I figured my Aunt C was in her room. I had dreams within this dream and referred to this context as "waking life" and the dreams within it as where I was getting lucid. That was how it shifted my mind.

Anyway, I was laying on my mattress, thinking about my previous dreams, when my mom walked by. She plugged in some kind of loud hair iron and it made lots of noise. "What's that?" I asked. "Don't complain to your mother!" She said, or something else scolding like that. First of all, I can complain to whoever the F I want. Second of all, I wasn't complaining, just asking. But if I was complaining, ain't nothin' wrong with it!!! Anyway, that part ended.

Between scenes of these dreams I remember returning to my dream bed. Within the dream layer 1 thing, I was laying on my right side, just like my physical body was. Except, I had severe sleep paralysis. I started to hear sounds that sounded like my sister being tortured... And wanted to help. I figured it was an attack by misunderstood entities, not physical, so i wanted to astral project out and defend her. However, I was frozen. I was "physically" frozen as well as my astral body being totally stuck. I tried to relax, and felt more misunderstood, but seemingly ominous feelings. Eventually I relaxed enough that I fell asleep in layer 1.

I had a false awakening in layer 2. My sister was showing me a card she had designed. It had a character drawn and colored in red and gold. At the bottom of the card were some box letters that I can't quite put into words. But they caught my attention. "I wrote those letters because when you look at them that way, you will be cursed with nightmares," she said. I didn't know layer 2 was a dream yet... 'Why would she do that to me?!' I thought.

I popped back into the dream of sleep paralysis in layer 1. 'Oh! That was a dream, too.' I thought. The misunderstood sounds and ominous feelings returned. I also got the feeling that I was gonna be stuck in this dream for some misunderstood reason, which led to feeling fear. I tried to relax, after realizing my layer 1's "astral body" was still stuck... And decided to just re-play my dreams in my mind.

Eventually, I "fell asleep" in layer 1, and had another "false awakening" in layer 2. Because I had been thinking about my previous dreams, a laptop materialized in front of me which had the outline of my dream journal entry all typed up. I didn't stop to think that I hadn't really typed anything yet.

Then this white-grey, misunderstood entity type of guy appeared to my left. He said he was here to "get me" or something like that. I felt him get me in like a bear hug and start taking me somewhere. 'Ahh! He's taking me to be tortured!' I thought. I tried to resist.

I felt really scared. Whatever this entity was, I was really misunderstanding him. My fear drove me to attempt to call on a religious name instead of attempt to dialogue with the entity. So, I called the religious name I could think of, which I associated some some ability to rescue me. Sure enough, I was delivered to a church type of place. I regretted calling on the religious name, since I knew for me it was a fear-based decision, and I missed an opportunity to get to know whatever "shadow" part of myself was arising.

There were some religious people up in the front. There were some quotes on the wall which I forgot. Friendly snakes and mice were going around. There didn't seem to be any negative connotation with the snakes. I did see one chase down a mouse who was running down its hole, and suck up the mouse, to eat it. It was just nature, though.

I went up near the throne thing and there were 3 people there. I knew I needed the bathroom. So I asked one guy who seemed to be in charge, if he could come with me back to "layer 1" (which I thought was physical world) so I could use the bath room, then take me back to the dream.

I boil had developed on the underside of my left big toe. It was a big bubble of skin and it hurt to walk on. The guy up front said, "That's your Inner Child." It made sense to me. I thought it was more of the psychic spell that I had been put under, and would be on my body back in layer 1 as well, which I thought was layer 0. Anyway, I headed back towards the bathroom...

As soon as I left the church place, the Misunderstood returned. I was kind of glad because I'd get another chance to try to understand and accept them. I felt the Misunderstood start to try to physically restrain me, and thought of a way to show the Misunderstood some acceptance. It worked. I woke up after we interacted a little bit. It was a friendly interaction once I chose to try accepting it. It was kind of personal so I will leave that part out of the public dream journal entry, but suffice to say, it was very constructive. I realized the number one thing I want to do if I get lucid is to ask for help "talking, trusting, feeling and remembering." I think "talking, trusting and feeling" is the ultimate experience for me, so that will be my ultimate dream goal for now on.


I was able to stay still for a while after waking up and recall the dream in good detail. After that, I couldn't sleep any more. It was 7:45 A M by the time I got up, which is great. It means I slept a lot. And sleeping a lot is good!!!

The first Dream I remember from the night is there is a building a small house I'm inside and outside of this house and there is a hole in the corner of the building that was dug by a small animal like a rodent and I'm looking at this hole and thinking about

I have a false Awakening in a room in the house which I don't know I'm lying in bed it's very light these sheets are white in the walls are white and my deceased wife is asking me that I saying that I have to earn some money and I'm not sure what it is that I need to do comma. Then outside there is a project across the street we need to move a building from one lot to another and I'm thinking boy that's going to take a lot of work we're going to have to we're going to have to deconstruct it ourselves and move the bricks level by level in layer by layer it's going to take a lot of work. Then I'm doing a Hulk jump onto the top of it one of these tall buildings nearby maybe perhaps a semi Lucid moment

I'm inside of building I'm in a bathroom I have to do some maintenance on the toilet and I'm trying to run wires in the holes where the toilet seat attaches to the toilet body and I'm having a lot of trouble getting the wires to fit there two wires that need to go through one of these small holes and these are data cables and I'm not excited I'm having a lot of trouble doing
Also inside this home I noticed that the one point there is a severe water leak water is dripping down from one level on to another this is a fairly common dream sign and I need to rush around to get to the source of the leak and to turn it off.
I'm rushing through this house at some point I find myself lost in a large open area with multiple floors visible I cannot find the path way to the place where I need to go I can see the different levels I can see the construction the stairways in the hallways there's a s. There is a large middle open area and I'm calling out that I'm lost and I don't know where to go into people the young man in the young woman show up and are helping me to find my way

Perhaps a continuation of this building dream I'm meeting someone perhaps a nun and there is something about performing a recorder concert

Fragment of looking at faces up close perhaps any lucid and I'm focusing on them and trying to recognize them and I sort of realize I'm in a dream

Created Saturday 16 June 2018

Got two DILDs to note, plus some fragments.

Scrap Group 1
A clip from a sci-fi movie, I think? An experiment going horribly wrong?

False awakening. I overheard the others up and about in the middle of the night. A few of them said highly unlikely things (namely, conversations about non-Hebrew deities). Although I identified as much, I was too tired to get anything done.

Dream 1 - Shadow Trial

The visuals were slightly blurred. I was entering a highschool. Reasoned there must've been some fundraiser event occurring inside. A noticeboard in front gave a curious indication of Eddie (from Guilty Gear) making an appearance, giving me all the more reason to proceed.

I spent a good while floating through the hallways. Along the way, I passed by the lunchroom, where a massive queue had formed. Whatever was inside must've been good, though I wasn't up for keeping still. And yet, somehow, I stumbled into the food prep area. Seemed there was a good variety of baked goods. The workfolk got wary of my presence, so I hurried out.

A while later, I ended up in a poorly lit open area in the upper floor (an empty storage room or attic, perhaps?). Got spontaneously lucid. So, from the shadows, I summoned Eddie, who first appeared in the likeness of Zato-1 (his host in the above-mentioned game) before taking his monstrous form. I wanted the creature to follow, only, he required my doing something for him first. Namely, that I endure a trial of survival. To start, the Forbidden Beast conjured a field of giant shadowy drills from the ground. Some lucky maneuvering let me avoid them all. After that, the hazards melted into black liquid. Wherever I turned, geysers erupted in sequence to bar my path. I rushed past these to higher ground.

The dream collapsed soon after. Made a DEILD attemtpt, though I lost consciousness two minutes later.

Dream 2 - Telekinetic Reprisal and Orange Metal Plated Vest

The visuals were slightly blurred. I was in a condo suite during daytime, the place appearing well furnished and organized. On a desk in one of the corners was a decades old computer system. The tenants there, two retired women in casual wear, had hired me as an electronics repair man. These weren't kindly old ladies, but rather, a pair of overbearing bitter shrews, caustic sarcasm spewed out with little provocation. It wouldn't have been too terrible, had they not placed obstructive (if not impossible) mandates towards when, where, and how I worked. Any screwups (inevitable, given the conditions) were met with increasingly disparaging remarks ("I could do better than that" was common), and, I'm sure, pay cuts.

Once at wit's end, I finally got aware. I promptly made my way out, thinking and blurting out that the above task wasn't at all fun. Woulda left things as it was, had not one of those hags made some smartass comment (don't remember, but it really got under my skin). In retaliation, I severed a few of their belongings with telekinesis, then used the same power to (harmlessly) hurl the two old bats at the ceiling.

Next, I ran off to a nearby stairway. I shrunk myself to bug sized, and hid out for a while. Figured the women would call the cops, and indeed, I did hear commotion relating to such, though I never saw it. When the coast was clear, I (literally) climbed up the stairway. As I did, a woman and her daughter passed by. I kept behind the railing, and though the girl noticed, her attempts to convey as much were met with disbelief from her mother.

After that, I walked through a balcony-hallway, my size concurrently restored to normal. There, I met up with various family members, of whom I identified mom, my brother Arthur, and nephew Hussein. The group commented about a man in a "metal plated orange vest", who they claimed was very dangerous. When asked, they indicated that he was just further down the balcony across us. I flew towards there, but got lost in thought. Things destabilized, and the dream collapsed.

I'm lying on my back on a strange boat that fits one person. I steer by moving my feet; there's no steering wheel or anything like that, the boat just obeys me. I'm in my hometown, on a very familiar and small road. It's raining heavily. The scene is unnatural, apocalyptic even - the entire town is underwater. I see no other soul. It's dark and silent, other than the constant rain making noise.

I steer the boat forward with my feet and mind. On some level I'm aware that I am causing this flood. I start thinking "What should I save? What should I let the flood destroy." and think this is good for the whole world. A fresh start. Pretty dark.

I steer the boat towards an apartment made of glass walls. I go through the glass into the flooded apartment. I see several beautiful women in other rooms of the apartment, silently staring at me. They looked sad. The scene is weird enough for me to finally start questioning my state. I become lucid and try to get up from the boat. I haven't moved my upper body the entire dream and can't do it even lucid. I lose the dream.

I no longer count lucid moments as lucid dreams, so I won't tag this as such.

The dream starts after school. After lunch, where I was talking to M, Finn and Jake were walking through my neighborhood to Rhode Island. Either that or my neighborhood was in Rhode Island. Anyway, they heard about a cat named Stan who needed something from my mom or someone who looked like her, so they went over to his house and there was a baby on his living room table that was crying so much that it was suffocating. It eventually became completely and entirely blue, but went back to red. Anyway, Jake went upstairs to the room where whatever Stan needed was being extracted from the person. There were three progress bars that read 100%, 50%, and 100%. As soon as that happened he rushed up the stairs and took her body in order to keep it as his own, his body probably given to my mom. A battle ensued and Finn and Jake won. Stan ran off, I said something about hating every family guy episode after the cat became evil (after episode nine, which was this one), and then I woke up.

Last night before bed there was an annoying motor in the neighbors yard. Eventually it went off around 9 but by that time I was so agitated because I'd already been trying to sleep. And it was torture. So I had a crap night of dreams and a crap night of sleep. I hate the world.

(ZZZ)

Round 1 of dreams. I remember something with S S and his dad, J S, and walking around a store. Something with some shelves. Something with a house in a neighborhood. Vague.

In one scene someone was chasing us. I remember they were behind a fence. And it showed them seeing P S's face in a scope. I had long hair and was following someone in the woods, talking with them.

RBFA. I might have woke up once before that and thought of some dreams but went back to sleep.

(ZZZ)

Round 2 of dreams.

I remember dreaming that there was another building near the A C A meeting in H. However it was laid out with more like city buildings than the actual town. I had found some kind of library or day time community center to hang out at. It reminded me of something in another dream where I went in and joined the people. Anyone could come join, there wasn't too much rigidity around membership.

I remember a library or computer lab part. Then I was sitting with some people at some tables. One table had all guys in camoflauge suits, like that was the "military" group. One "military" guy was standing up telling everyone about "morals". I realized that the "military" guys were just a bunch of control freaks and what they called "moral" was really just arbitrary, or the way they preferred other people to act. But, they would enforce it with military force. So I was considering leaving. I didn't want to speak up just yet in case I could enjoy a different group in the building.

They started to say how a child should be beaten for not following their rules. Now it had gone too far. I was going to speak up that that's wrong, but another guy did. But then someone next to him said, "Yeah, beat him!" I got up and looked at the military guy who was standing up. I gave him a look like, 'This is totally wrong.' And left without saying anything. While I was in the stair well, I considered speaking out next time... Even if it got me kicked out of the place. I realized its more important to speak out, even if I become alienated, than to "silently enable" wrong crap to continue happening.

However, I also realized I could identify with wanting someone to be punished. However, I don't want children to be punished. I want the damn smokers to be punished!!! So I did realize there was that identification there as I walked away.

When I got down stairs I helped a guy named "Kevin" bus the tables. It was nice to be involved, and doing something, but without the constraints of a formal job. "Kevin" and I talked as we bussed the tables. He offered me a 100-point card to play the games there. I wouldn't accept it because I didn't want our friendship to be based on me expecting that from him. I just wanted to be friends. He insisted but I insisted more in turn and so he kept the card.

There was another guy there who asked where I was from. I told him I was from the meeting accross the road and found the place during the day. He seemed okay with it.

There was another part where there was a dance at the community center. There was a woman who was named "Food-O-Saurus" and she was extremely obese. She had been my date the previous year. The dance was coming around this year and I wondered if I should ask her to be my date again. I didn't want to because... I guess I wanted to be with someone who was more in shape? (Trying to say that in a nice way.) But I felt kind of bad for not asking her.

RBFA.

(ZZZ)

Round 3 of dreams.

The first part I remember is driving around the streets of some city place. F D, my uncle's friend, was smoking a cigarette. I saw the smoke all over the place. My car windows were up though. I waved to him and didn't have a lot of anger come up. But I wanted to find a parking spot.

I was afraid that his smoke would permeate the whole parking lot. There was a spot right up front near the handicap spot that I tried to back into. The people in the spot next to that one were getting in or out of their car. I tried to back in.

Eventually I got into the building. It was another community center kind of place. in one room, B Z was teaching a kid how to make music for free using audio software. Instrumentals and stuff like that. I paid attention too, hoping to learn something. I remember looking through some file folders. I figured I would tell M about what I learned, since he made songs too.

Then there were some bags of spinach. On the spinach bags there were quotes about something related to hating smokers. I remember putting the spinach from one bag into a blender but some kept falling on the floor. I couldn't tell how it was falling. But it was mainly because it was a dream.

Then the kid was telling B Z about how Stephen Colbert would take over the world. He had these shoulder harness things with spikes on them. Then it showed a dance performance. The woman was wearing something like that. She levitated into the guys arms some how. Or just levitated her legs. The guy was crying tears of amazement at her dancing skills. I remember seeing their faces. I remember the woman had some kind of wire going around her body. Maybe connecting to the shoulder pads.

There was some kind of phone logo that went by in the sky. It said a, t, t or something like that. With a black background, and red and white lettering. Lots of people were in the crowd.

I recalled those.

I got up around 6 to make the outline of those dream journal entries. Thinking I'd be able to sleep again if I cleared my head. But, I didn't sleep again.

Date of Dream: SAT 16 JUN - 2018



Dream No. 355 - Separated Sections

Dream 355 A - An Anti-Lucid Mind (Lucid Dream 20)
I don't remember much of this dream. From where I do remember, I was at some unknown area which was half way between a suburb and an accommodation complex. Something minorly bad happened, I forgot what specifically, and so I started calling out for Dreamy WB. In some part of the dream, Mr H was there and instructing a bunch of girls but I forgot what for.

At one stage, I'm walking down the footpath and I randomly look down and count my fingers, seeing six of them. I have this feeling of awareness about me but as soon as this happens, the dream tries to fade out on me. I realised this and I also realised I wasn't finished, and so to take action, I said to the dreamscape, “Fine! I'll stop being lucid... You stupid dream”. That action worked, causing the dream not to fade anymore, so I didn't switch my awareness off for nothing.

So then I went back to obliviously calling for Dreamy WB. It took a huge effort as I called a massive number of times and nothing happened. Eventually though, my persistence paid off and she came walking the opposite way down the street to meet me. I have forgotten her exact appearance in the dream but she was accurately clean. She had a casual outfit on and her hair was in either a pigtail or braided style. She hugged me and that's all I can remember about this dream.

Dream 355 B - My Brother's New Friend
The dream started with the whole family being in some unknown suburb. My brother had made a new friend from university and his name was Troy (Troy doesn't exist in real life), he had a similar resemblance to my brother's real life friend RK. Although my brother would speak to Troy, I would speak to him more.

We were driving him back to sleep at our house. Now my mum was nowhere to be seen and in my dad's car, it was my dad and brother in the front, and Troy and I in the back. Troy and I got a long really well and we were talking so much to each other in the back seat. For the whole dream though, my dad was angry at me and didn't want a bar of anything to do with me. I would talk and my dad would constantly complain and tell me off.

We all ended up at a petrol station to get fuel for the car. My dad and brother went in to get the fuel, Troy stayed in the car and I went to check out this shelf of goods that was outside right next to the servo front door. I was so amazed at the products on this shelf. There were these bags of chips, the bags were literally as big as a full human body. And then there was this sausage shaped deli cheese that I remember from the 90s. My brother and dad walked out of the servo and I urged them to come to the shelf. My dad ignored me but my brother reluctantly came. I told him, “That's the cheese we used to have at Baka's!”.

The next dream scene was back at our house. I walked into the kitchen to see my mum and say hello to her. My dad walked in and my mum saw that she was angry and so she asked him why. He complained about me for the whole car trip although I didn't do anything wrong. That's all I can remember about this dream.




Dream Tasks
- Have Logan receive harsh penalties from Dreamy WB due to reckless social behaviours (Achieved? No)
- Investigate where my SML postage has gone (Achieved? No)
- Reach the Gyeongbokgung Palace (Achieved? Partially)
- Have Dreamy WB or Murray go to console an upset dream character (Achieved? No)
- In accordance to the "shared dreaming experiment" proceed on locating the moon (Achieved? No)



Dream 355: Results (Competition #4)

355 A
Competition Night: 15
Lucid or Non-Lucid?: Lucid
Dream Guide: Dreamy WB
Emergency Team: None
Eligible For Competition Points: Yes

355 B
Competition Night: 15
Lucid or Non-Lucid?: Non-Lucid
Dream Guide: None
Emergency Team: None
Eligible For Competition Points: Yes



Points For This Entry: 17.0
Calculation Details:
- First Lucid Of The Night (10.0)
- Was Introduced via DILD (5.0)
- Summon Dream Guide: Non-Lucid (1.0)
- Full Non-Lucid Dream: 355 B (1.0)


+ Previous Total: 58.0
Total Accumulated Points: 75.0

Went to sleep around 8:30 P M. Had 3 fairly high quality L D's.
4,210 words…

(ZZZ)

Round 1 of dreams. There was a lot in these dreams, but when I woke up, I needed the bathroom right away. So I didn't get as good of recall.

I remember being at the local food store. One of the registers was like a self-checkout. But instead of a register thing they had a video game screen. So I went into that and played it.

I forgot exactly what it was but I think it had a Mario type of game. And a long walk way thing that curved around in 3D to walk along. It had like 40 coins along it. It was cool and I wish I remembered more.

I think in some parts, I was running from someone. I remember passing by one or two guys in a hall way.

Then I remember running down a corridor. I had a black nerf gun thing with bright orange darts. I wanted to wait in the end of the corridor and then shoot them at Transmetals 1 Megatron, who was chasing me.

Eventually I got to a bathroom. Megatron was chasing me, still. I had to go #2 as well as hide from Megatron. So I went in a stall and tried to perch with my feet on the actual seat. It was hard to "get it out".

Then Megatron walked in. He had his tail laser cannon thing. I saw him through the crack in the stall. I kept hiding, hoping he'd conclude that I wasn't in here.

Eventually I left the stall. Megatron was still there, talking with 2 other guys. One guy's name was "Edwin". He had large front middle teeth and a navy blue shirt. Megatron asked us all the same question. I think it was actually, "Whats the best lucid dreaming technique?" but I'm not totally sure.

I woke up from that and recalled a little. But, I had to use the bathroom pretty urgently. So, in getting up to do that, I think I dis-lodged some of the dream details. How frustrating! It happened 3 times tonight, costing me a lot of recall.

RBFA. I'm able to re-remember some of rounds 1 and 2 now without needing to write anything until morning. This is fantastic!!!

(ZZZ)

Round 2 of dreams.

I remember being chased again in this dream. Like with round 1 of dreams, there was a lot in the beginning that I forgot.

Eventually I got to a class room. There was an exam going on. I remember the teacher was Ms. T, the math teacher from my senior year of high school. There was a desk for me to the right of D H, next to the center of the class room.

When I looked at my exam, it was confusing. The first question was about the number pi. It asked to express the answer without using r squared. I tried to make an alternate equation by putting r outside parenthesis and then h over r as one of the terms. I was thinking of pi r squared which would be the circumference. I didn't realize that it was only asking about pi. The question said I could only use i, the imaginary number thing. It said 10 to 15 points.

I decided with the person next to me, who turned into P W, that we would skip that one and move on. The rest of the questions were also fairly confusing. I remember there were more on the back of the paper.

I remember L K talked to us after a while. Also, the desks had shifted and became a long table, rotated 90 degrees. I was looking at the back of a clicky pencil. L K said how she wanted us to wear alligator heads. She would like it if we wore alligator heads. I was looking at the clicky pencil thinking of alligator heads.

I woke up directly from that and recalled those parts fairly easily. But again, I had to get up to use the bathroom too soon. The details were OTTOTT but having to use the bathroom dis-lodged them too much. These 2 rounds of dreams reminded me what my recall felt like a year ago... Frustrating! But I told myself I wouldn't give up, and the next rounds of dreams would be a lot better. Which, they were!

RBFA. I want to note that tonight when I did RBFA I still re-remembered 100%!

(ZZZ)

Round 3 of dreams. I got a lot of high quality lucid time in these.

First I remember being in the guest room. There were 2 people in there, a man, and a woman. I think they were showing each other their morning yoga routines. Eventually, the guy leaned forward with his arms out to the sides. Behind him on the wall, there were a bunch of Pokemon cards. For some reason, seeing the Pokemon cards on the wall immediately triggered lucidity. I've had Pokemon cards on my wall in waking life, but its also happened in many dreams. That was how I got lucid.

Then I was kind of teleported to my bed at 24. I was laying on my right side, the same side as my physical body was, but staring at the cards on the wall. At first they took up my whole vision. Then I remember being able to get up out of bed and move a little. But that led to a false awakening.

In the false awakening, I was in the same room, just not lucid any more. There were more magic or pokemon cards on my bed. I examined one closely, too. I remember there was someone else in the room. I was probably trying to recall and record my dream. All I remember from this is a white cabinet door with a little white knob, but I'm sure there were more details in this scene.

I remember this part with a children's book. At first, it was really scary. I was looking through it and there was a circular-headed guy on there. The first picture of his face wasn't too scary. But on the next pages it showed one of the scariest faces I've ever seen. It was like a circular monster mouth with sharp teeth. Just the proportions of the eyes and nose and mouth made it really freaky. I was like, 'Why am I looking at this?!' and turned back to the nicer pages. When I looked back through the book, the pages were different. 'How did the pages change?' I thought, but didn't get lucid. This time there was a funny cartoon mouth, like from a meme. And every page had a similar mouth on a different character. At the end it was a pop-up book with a zebra with the funny mouth, and some thing that pulled out of the page.

I remember being in this room with glass-door fridges. There was some talk of reading one of the children's books on a meeting. Maybe the 2 PM W A meeting. I think I was eating red and blue popsicle things.

Next thing I remember, I was listening to a friend on the phone. He needed someone to listen to him, so I was listening. As I listened, I washed a cup. Then I worried that the sound would disrupt him. He asked me to stay on the phone with him for a few hours. I said, sure. So, he continued talking. I think he became G.

Then I was walking G to her dorm. I remember walking over an elevated garden thing. I don't think I was lucid. I said that the more we talk about the difficult emotions, the more spirits will come out at night. (Which I figure is a good thing.) I think she went inside.

I remember falling asleep within the dream, again, on my right side, like how my physical body was. The bed was in the middle of the room. I felt vibrations come on. I felt something ominous, and began to fear the night terror. I would open my eyes a little, and see some black mist or black dots floating around. I kept telling myself, 'This is a dream. This is a dream.' And trying to relax. I figured if I relaxed enough, I'd get to a really great lucid dream... Which I did!

After the ominous feelings passed, I heard my sister speaking in a foreign language. She said the word "ningun" which I think is Spanish for "nothing" and a bunch of other words. I spoke in a foreign language too. Not one I understand. The message was that my dad had prepared food for us all. I got up to go enjoy some dream food, lucidly!

So, I went out to the hall. There was a kitchen, and a hall way. Then it led to a dining room. I remember beginning to sample the foods. I know I ate some kind of bread or cookie thing. There were some Spanish or Latin American people there with us, too. Everyone had a plate of multi-colored bell peppers with white dressing. Maybe it was Ranch Dressing. I went to eat one. I worried that it might be waking life, and I would end up eating food I would be allergic to, thinking it was a dream. I discreetly did a finger palm test. My finger went through a little and I confirmed it was a dream.

Then my dad started to fight my Uncle C about how he should get a job. 'Uh-oh,' I thought. I just wanted everyone to be happy. I thought I could solve the conflict by showing them it was a dream. "Look!" I said. And I floated up about eight feet above the ground.

My dad's eyes looked like he had been drinking. I realized that this wasn't going to go anywhere helpful, and hoped I'd still be able to salvage the dream. I flew away, down the hall. This was a great example of "walking away from an unhealthy situation".

I arrived at a library kind of place. I was eating some brown cookie or bread thing. In one of the shelf cubbies, there was a big bag of cheese sauce. Oh! I also remember mayonnaise and black pepper. Anyway, I dispensed some cheese sauce on my food, and it spilled all over the desk.

A guy started to follow me around. "You'll have to pay for that damage," he said. At first I thought of telling him it was just a dream, but figured he wouldn't believe me. "Okay, so send me the bill!" I said, hoping to get him off my back. He continued following me.

We got to a room with some books. He kept telling me I wasn't doing the right thing. I pulled out a four to six inch thick encyclopedia of animals and read through it. He said that wasn't the best thing for me to do. "What should I do then?" I asked. "Go get a job?! Go find a girlfriend?!" He didn't answer. Then, I noticed an opening in the roof that showed through to the sky. And I flew out through it.

That was the best thing for me to do!! The dream remained totally stable as I flew through the blue and white sky. It was kind of pixelated. I kept yelling out, "F*** all this S***", referring to all the stuff back on the ground. I think I flew for a while, just in the open sky. That's the longest I've ever flown. It really felt like flying.

I started to notice there was water beneath me. I had been flying so long that I figured it must be the ocean. My dream goal of exploring the depths of the sea came to mind. 'What if there are sharks or other scary fish?' I thought. 'What if it is too cold?' I also thought. But I was feeling confident, and just flew right into the water. It wasn't cold.

I projected some kind of peace into the water so that no fish would come to eat me. Then I just swam down as fast as I could. I guess I was breathing under water but didn't think of breathing at the time. The water was kind of dark. I was doing a breast stroke.

I started to see some shiny dots at the bottom. When I got there, they turned out to be a bunch of pennies. 'Pennies?' I thought. I looked up and saw I was only 10-20 feet deep. 'Aw, man,' I thought, kind of dissappointed. I began to feel fear of sharks again and flew up. It was easy to fly up out of the water though. That was difficult in earlier L D's but tonight it was easy.

I got onto a beach. The same library building was right there, so i guess I hadn't flown far. Or the dream transported me back. I went to this brown porch thing to get a running start and fly again. I think I flew a little and then ended up inside the library some how. I tried to run and take off again, but bumped into the brown ceiling. There was only a narrow opening to the sky, which I missed.

I kept trying to fly out. But then a boat went under me and I bumped into the mast. I ended up almost tipping their boat by having my weight up on the mast. They were angry at me, and began to shoot spoons at me from bows and arrows! I easily deflected them and flew around near the ceiling.

I started to realize that they might be trying to wake me up. Deflecting all the spoons wasn't too hard but it was starting to work me up. 'Time to go to the next level!' I thought. 'Let's stop time!' So I did it for a second. For a split second, time stopped. But it resumed again.

'Two minutes this time,' I thought. My plan was to stop time and then go out through the door and fly before time resumed again. That might be one of my first times stopping time in a dream.

I didn't need to go potty right away after these dreams. As a result, I was able to recall almost 100%. How wonderful! I'm glad I didn't give up.

RBFA and re-remembered 100% in morning.

(ZZZ)

Round 4 of dreams.

It was some kind of meeting. And people passing a note.

RBFA.

(ZZZ)

Round 5 of dreams. I got a little more lucid time in these.

I know there were more parts earlier. But the first thing I remember is baby Doug. Baby doug's head was a toilet paper roll. But instead of white paper, it was skin-color. 'Do they have this kind of character in the show?' I thought to myself. Then i was on the bed, and I think I was the baby. I remember saying that I wouldn't tell my mom my name. 'Won't she already know it?' I thought. There was a phone on the bed.

I remember falling out of the bed onto my shoulder. Then I got up and I was lucid.

My sister was towards the door of nana's room. There was a wooden construct with two wooden 2 x 4's as legs and then one long 2 x 4 on top. I wanted to show my sister that I could karate chop it. I gathered my energy and tried, but it didn't work. I tried again, but it didn't work. I thought about how I must convince myself that it isn't really a solid object.

I laid down to go to sleep. I think I lost lucidity at that time. I was feeling some sensations like I might DEILD or WILD... While at the same time hearing someone like Robert Monroe talking about being more than physical matter and more than the physical body. I started to need the bath room. This really bugged me because I thought I just went. And I was so close to WILD. (Little did I know, I was in a dream already!) I told myself I'd pick up right where I left off after using the bathroom.

When i went to go to the bathroom in the dream, I woke up, feeling warmth... "Down there"... and was really afraid I had wet the bed! Luckily, I didn't. I tried to stay still long enough to recall some dreams, but eventually, had to get up. Some details still came to me after laying back down.

RBFA.

(ZZZ)

Round 6 of dreams! That's what I love about being able to re-remember after RBFA. I get to sleep more!

This was a simple non-lucid dream of being in the kitchen at 24. I remember green boxes of cookies or crackers in the cabinet above the microwave spot. I looked for the toll house crackers and found a sleeve of cookies instead. 'Did I really eat gluten?' I thought. I was relieved when I woke up and hadn't. But during the dream I just told myself, "Well, I guess everyone makes mistakes. I hardly noticed." I remember my sister was at the table. She is in a lot of my dreams!

RBFA.

(ZZZ)

Round 7 of dreams. I got a little more lucid time in these.

First there was a part with a phone meeting. M was sharing. He didn't use his full share time. A L was moderating. She said next time he could use the last minute if he wanted. 'Was that cross talk?' I thought.

Then some other people were deciding who would share next. I thought maybe I would. I remember being near a bathroom stall. Then I think it transformed from hearing everyone on a phone meeting to actually being in a class room with them.

Then I remember 3 guys coming to sit near me. One had shiny black hair and ink or hair dye running down the back of his neck. I thought it might be because he was in disguise.

I remember waking up for a moment during these and thinking about the last scene before dreams began again. I was at a sink, cleaning some dishes, or dumping stuff in the sink. A guy came up to my left with my green salad bowl on his head. Two holes were poked in it for his eyes. One had a yellow piece of paper over it. "Is this a good way to check if I'm dreaming?" he asked. "Yes!" I said. "Great idea."

Another guy, maybe C C, was saying how he would write me some tips about lucid dreaming or R C's on little slips of paper. "Thanks!" I said. I really didn't think I needed them, but just wanted to be nice.

Then he went on to show me these amazing colored pencil drawings of a guy with his arms over his head, and some kind of trapezoid shaped armor in his arms. It started to look like bricks. There were several forms of this character on the paper. One made of only black and red on the bottom left. I was amazed at the skill. The last picture I was shown had a left side profile view of this hero character. To his right was a brick wall with some bricks missing that showed the sky, water and beach on the other side.

I remember getting lucid laying in a bed. I was laying on my left side, like my physical body, but it was a dream. I remember a dog on the corner of the bed I was facing. It seemed to want to absorb me. I thought of a big monster appearing and letting it eat me as part of the lucid dream.

There was one part where I saw a bunch of 20 and 100 dollar bills. They belonged to a guy from earlier in the dream, who was standing near by. I asked if I could have them. He said no. I figured he might be dreaming so I could play a joke on him. I got a withdrawal slip from his bank and asked him to sign it so I could take out money for him. He laughed, but didn't fall for the joke.

There was something with a female character that I forgot. I remember someone being underneath a truck as it drove, with their head in a blue box. Sparks flew from the box as it scraped the road beneath the truck.

I wanted to talk more to the female character but she was on the other side of a glass door, and held it shut. I felt bad. Did I do something wrong? Well, I went to do something else in the dream.

Then I decided I'd like to apologize, even though I don't know what it was. She was heading down a long series of stairs, maybe to the bus. I decided to swing down the stair rails to catch up with her. Eventually, I got past her so that she would walk towards me as she came down. But she never came down. I guess she vanished.

Then, that part of the dream ended. I was in a false awakening of looking at r/luciddreaming sub reddit.

I woke up and recalled these pretty well. Stayed still and replayed rounds 1 through 7 in my mind. When I wake up from one dream I re-play it 3 to 4 times in my mind before going to re-remember the previous rounds of dreams in my mind. This is to form a "solid image" of it or as slash112 says "make multiple copies" of the memory.

I felt like I wouldn't fall asleep again and got up. It was about 7:07 A M. When I get up, I just make an outline of the dream journal entry, with some key words. This way within 20 minutes I can have all the main ideas written somewhere and not worry about forgetting it. Then I will work on writing the full entry throughout the day. I am lucky my dream memory is strong enough now to be able to do that but even a year ago it wasn't this strong. In the last year, my dream memory really sky-rocketed.

Morning of June 15, 2018. Friday.



I am carrying an acoustic guitar, walking around in an unknown large room of equidistant picnic tables, similar to the break room of the factory (Northern Engraving) I worked at in the 1980s. The lighting is dim but it is clear enough to see. At first, I am mostly lazily strumming an up and down series of chord progressions that are not musically interrelated; C, D, E, D, C (in Majors). The chords are not fingered correctly even though the guitar is perceived as having the standard tuning. I mostly move my left hand, fingers all in a row, down and up the neck, leaving the second string open, which would not result in a proper sequence of chords either by fingering or by more desirable musical progressions. What I am playing would, for example, imply a C Major chord being F#, B, E, A, B, F# which is incorrect.

Danny Trejo sits with others, facing me, and watches me from another part of the room. He looks at me as if he is very annoyed by my activity. I start moving my left hand closer to the sound hole to create chords of a higher pitch, sometimes playing only the first four strings, though with the same unrelated down and up sequences of three Major chords. Eventually, it seems to sound better and takes on more of a song-like quality.

I find myself walking near another group of tables and playing both rhythms and melodies. There is a fuller sound, but of which would not be possible in real life, as the melodies and rhythms are simultaneous. A girl unknown to my dream self (though meant to be a rendering of Lucille Starr as in 1965) is soon walking to my right, having stood up from a nearby picnic table. She starts singing very harmoniously in French. (“Quand le Soleil Dit Bonjour aux Montagnes” / “When the Sun Says ‘Good Day’ to the Mountains”.) I continue to walk around playing intriguing melodic patterns as the singing continues, until my dream fades.

---

Autosymbolic threads of the dreaming and waking process: Other than the transformation of the preconscious personification in the waking transition (by way of non-lucid dream control) to the emergent consciousness factor as Lucille Starr (who represented my subliminal memory of Zsuzsanna as I woke), most of this dream is based on literal factors and literally focused awareness (rather than the typical autosymbolic focused awareness).

Literal threads of dreaming and waking process (dream state indicators): The song itself (“When the Sun Says 'Good Day’ to the Mountains” as a waking process reference and “Je suis seul avec mes reves sur la montagne”, sang in English as “I’m alone with my dreams on the hilltop”.)

Non-lucid dream control evidenced by: Transformation of the preconscious waking autosymbolism from Danny Trejo being annoyed to Lucille Starr singing joyfully on my right. (Waking orientation is typically autosymbolically rendered as to my right as I sleep on my left side, which is less exposed to the real environment.)

Present real-life-related literal threads: I follow Danny Trejo on Twitter but we do not post to each other. I am joyful in being married and with a loving family for over twenty years.

Past real-life-related literal threads: I produce music, but I do not play acoustic guitar as much as when I was younger. The Lucille Starr song was one shared between Zsuzsanna and me before we met (as well as being a song from my childhood) and is very nostalgic for me. She sent a copy to me on cassette.

---

Abridged and simplified on Friday, 15 June 2018. I offer thanks to the casual reader for their time and interest.

---

1,960 words.

(ZZZ)

Round 1 of dreams.

I remembered more from these dreams but couldn't re-remember it later.

(ZZZ)

Round 2 of dreams.

I had lots of dreams of being angry at smokers. One woman was someone from the phone meetings. I think I threw her cancer stick in a puddle. Another woman was a smoker and lived behind me. I would yell at her over the fence, and she yelled back at me. I was glad to ruin her smoking time and thought she was un-intelligent for defending her "right" (which really isn't a "right") to smoke. When all smoking does it harm her and others.

There were some parts where I was in a basement. There was a yellowish couch. And grey paint. I remember the couch was perpendicular to the TV. I rotated it so it faced the TV. There was a video game console and it used a disc as the memory card. I also remember some stair climbers in there.

I remember sitting with my Aunt C and maybe other relatives at some tables. We had white credit card kind of things. On the back they had some combinations of letters and numbers. They were cut in half. When we combined them, if they had the right combination of letters and numbers, we might win a prize. Two of our things combined to form a word.

I also had to fill out a form with my secondary hobbies. I put Electrical Engineering as my major, which is what I did in college. Then for hobbies, I put oneironautics, exercise science, nutrition, and maybe something else. It was on a form on white paper.

I woke up and recalled them. Then let it go to RBFA.

(ZZZ)

Round 3 of dreams.

I fought with more smokers in these dreams. Eventually, that part was over. I remember standing outside in the daylight. Mrs. M, my friend A M's mom, walked by. She told me I seemed a little "cocky" about fighting the smokers. I was offended that this word choice. As she walked away, I said, "I know what I'm doing!!!" My Uncle G was near by and he seemed to appreciate the clean air. Even my dad seemed to smile at me for fighting for what's right.

I also dreamed again of that basement. This time there were some people coming down to the basement. I remember two women. They wanted to use the stair climber machines.

I probably forgot stuff in the middle. I remember being in the school hallway with a football coach guy and some people from high school football. I think it was M K or K P who punched a smaller guy in the shoulder. He looked hurt. I wanted to try to stand up for him but wasn't sure of the exact situation yet.

I remember there was a woman in these dreams who has no correspondence to anyone in waking life. She was a little younger than me, maybe 2-3 years younger than me. And kind of tan. I remember she was a recurring character in tonight's dreams. I saw her in the hall way. I think it was at the end of these dreams. She had a piece of tan construction paper with some writing. She was walking one way in the hall as I walked the other way.

RBFA.

(ZZZ)

Round 4 of dreams.

In these dreams I remember going with some friends. We were headed towards a beach to do a kayak trip. I was wondering how to bring my kayak. They were holding some giant road signs, like from the highway. I wondered where their kayaks were. I think M B was there. It turned out they were all renting kayaks. I felt embarrassed not to have the money to rent one. I said I was still preparing so I could get a kayak next time.

I saw the woman from earlier dreams in the hall way. I don't remember ever hearing her name but it was like we were in a relationship. I started to tell her the kayak story. Then a blonde woman stood next to her and smiled at me. I couldn't quite understand why. I said that I was telling the other woman my kayak story. I felt embarrassed that my interest in the original woman was found out by her friend, who said her name was "Gabriella". (No waking life correspondance.)

RBFA.

(ZZZ)

Round 5 of dreams.

These dreams had a lot of continuity. I remember being at a beach or a library, or a combination.

I was trying to find the woman I liked again. She didn't seem to be around. Then I came accross this guitar thing. It had 2 sets of strings near each other. One with 4 strings, one with 3 strings. I asked, is that the same guitar that Andy McKee plays? And someone there said it sure was. I played some of the notes and they sounded pretty good. I also thought this might impress the woman I liked.

I couldn't take the instrument yet because, as the person there demonstrated to me, a string was missing. So we had to use one of these little bolt screw things to get the string in there. However, they didn't line up right. We decided we would have to do some soldering. The other person there soldered one string. I wanted to solder the next one, so I could be more involved. However, I was worried about the fumes from the soldering, and there was no mask or exhaust. There was a piece of solder in a "C" shape on the wire. But before I got the iron to it, I realized I had been waiting to go to the bathroom. So I really needed to go!

In the dream, I went to find the bathroom. I was afraid it would be far away. I was so mad at "civilization" for limiting bathroom use to one little room. I walked through a class room and the teacher was in the bathroom there. The door was partially open and I think I saw his leg. He said he would be 7 minutes. '7 minutes?!' I thought. 'I can't wait 7 minutes!'

I saw another room that might be a bathroom. When I went in I saw the word, "Women". People objected to me going in there but I didn't care! I couldn't wait 7 minutes. I was so mad that I wouldn't be allowed to just go to the bathroom outside. I guess I do get angry when I am stuck "holding it in".

RBFA.

(ZZZ)

Round 6 of dreams.

I woke up for a moment but didn't recall any dreams from that sleep. So I just went over rounds 1 through 5 in my head.

(ZZZ)

Rounds 7 and onward of dreams were a lot of RBFA'ing.

There was one scene in which a pack of wolves were living in my front lawn. One baby wolf went out towards the road, behind where my car is in waking life. The parent wolf went after it and brought it back to behind the bushes, underneath the window on the right. Then the parent wold kept biting the little wolf. I felt bad that it was essentially a punishment.

There was another dream about a guy in a white jump suit thing, doing a presentation in front of a white board. I forgot what it was about, but after the video ended, it showed his bloopers. During the bloopers it showed him getting so excited about the subject matter that he wet his pants. It showed it happening two separate times and that wasn't even all the bloopers! His reaction when he saw that he had wet his pants one of great surprise.

In yet another dream, I went into a gym. There was a heavy guy on a stair climber. Maybe another woman there. I think I looked on the stair climber a little bit. Then, I went up into this attic thing. It was kinda dark. I think it was like a barn with some plants to take care of. I only remember it vaguely but I think I made a mistake on one of the plants.

Another dream involved my sister. I was asking her to play a riff on the low E string of my guitar with frets 3, 7 and 8. She didn't really want to play it. I picked up my guitar and did some playing. But I was including other notes on the low E string, too. I think the sound was pretty clear within the dream.

Then there was something at a building like a school. I know there were lockers in the hall. I had a drop down menu to select what type of smoke was there, as a way of complaining about it. I remember the thing said one option was water vapor GTS or something like that. That was the one I selected. There was a smoker who talked to me. I said if its a vapor thing, just don't let me see you doing it. He said he wouldn't let the leader of the "anti cigarettes club" catch him.

The last scene I remember was about a cell phone plan. It used one of those toy dispensers with the little plastic cases to explain how the phone plan worked. The toy dispenser was full of little black cases. One for each day of the month. Then it showed a purple plastic easter egg kind of thing with a line around the circumference. It was being cut open by scissors. That represented that day's cell phone service.

I kept RBFA'ing after each dream until eventually I didn't have any more sleep. Once I can tell I've slept enough, I gradually get up. When I first looked at the clock it was 7:30 A M which means I slept a lot. I think I was asleep by 9. I feel pretty rested today.

Morning of June 14, 2018. Thursday.



My current conscious self identity is mostly stripped away and my dream self is cast back into the front yard of my Cubitis home (where I have not lived since 1978). However, the thread of awareness of having Zsuzsanna as my wife is present to a degree and I otherwise feel as myself in terms of age. I can assume that this is meant to be our home in this dream. Semi-darkness might indicate it is night, but the perception of time is mostly ambiguous and not clearly defined as in many other dreams.

Precursory preconscious factors kick in, this time rendered as two boys that are mischievously trespassing on our front yard. I am closer to the highway at one point. When I go closer to them, I see they are messing around with two long pipes. I am not certain where the pipes came from.

I decide to use one of the pipes as a weapon even though it is about six feet in length. I want to knock them about and make them go out from our front yard. I miss several times, but also strike them on the sides now and then. Eventually, it seems as if they were never there.

I find myself in an unfamiliar area that is implied to be our home, but the room is completely unfamiliar. It seems to be a bathroom. The solid pipe I am holding transforms into a hose and the end of it jumps onto the small metal wheel, as if due to a powerful magnetic force, of a white porcelain bathtub that is on its side. The bathtub is on its left side and facing me. The wheel the hose is stuck to is at the upper left in my view. Zsuzsanna is present. It seems a part of the wall fell off to reveal a hidden storage area, where the old bathtub is on the bottom shelf of two large shelves. The bathtub likely belonged to a previous resident. I notice patches of black dirt here and there. There are other items stored inside this section of wall (which seems to divide the room near the middle) that we had apparently not known about.

I pull on the hose several times (from the other side of the room) to get it off, but it holds firmly. Finally, I go closer and see it has fully attached in the manner of some sort of valve. I press and pull on a thin, circular piece partly inside a pipe near the wheel of the bathtub after partly pulling off part of the edge of the hose as something gives as air hisses out. I feel the rest of the end of the hose release and come off. Apparently, even though the event seemed magnetic at first, it now seems to have been the result of automatic suction, purposely developed for special parts to somehow automatically connect as such.

---

I have had 3 ongoing nightmares of home invaders. They don't exactly get a chance to harm me because I have trained my dream consciousness to fight off attackers. Either ninja swords or shotguns, I get the job done. For the first time though, I forced an attacker to tell me their name...and the person said their name was "Christine Young". I don't know anyone by that name, but I sure as hell should them which way the door was. Dream invasion aint cool.

2,649 words.

(ZZZ)

I had one round of dreams that I RBFA'ed. I was thinking about them and starting to wonder if I could record them some how but fell back asleep. I think there were parts with C V, O A and A R. Other than that, I draw a total blank.

(ZZZ)

I fell back asleep while recalling round 1 of dreams without even knowing it. On to round 2 of dreams.

The first thing I remember is being at a play ground type of thing. My parents and their friends were standing around. There was a little girl in pink with a funny little bicycle. C was her mom and she was off to the side smoking. I was about to leave but I decided to pay attention to the little girl since no one else was.

There was something about how I gave her a tupperware to use as a potty. So she was gladly walking around with that. Then I went to the bathroom. I thought I might need to use the potty myself. I was listening to a phone meeting. R was saying how when she gave up sugar, a lot of feelings came up. Then she took them out on other people.

There was a part where my dad was sitting in a recliner chair. Someone said he needed a ride home. I said I would drive him, and not even stop to use the bathroom. But they said there was time. I went to say bye to everyone.

Then I was in my Nana's room. My cousin J was over by the bed. She was much younger. I was going to lean on the bed post and do a hamstring stretch. Then I decided it would be fun to pretend J had super strength and could beat me up. So we pretended to fight and I pretended to be knocked back accross the room or knocked over.

Then I remember Megatron's face. I was lining up the helmet a little bit. I wanted to be able to rapidly transform the Megatron action figure from T Rex Mode to robot mode. There were some youtube videos I thought of about how to transform it fast. I thought about opening the helmet thing where there was an extra mask.

Then I was just seeing the face and helmet and adjusting it. I remember the color red. Initially I was thinking about the T Rex megatron. Then it zoomed out to show a form of Dragon Megatron.

This Dragon Megatron had the dragon head as part of its back. In fact it was more of a Dragon's body with Megatron's head where its neck would be. So it zoomed out to show Megatron's whole body. Megatron was saying how powerful he was.

Then it showed Rampage laughing hysterically at Dragon Megatron. Rampage laughed so hard that he had to lay on his side on the ground and grasp his stomach. I figured this meant that Rampage was so powerful that even Dragon Megatron was just a total joke to him. Dragon Megatron seemed mad to be being mocked in this way.

I tried to explain this to my Nana. Why Rampage was so powerful. Then I realized I didn't know what the next scene would be in this show. I took a break. I remember thinking it would be a fight scene and so I would need to select some music. I thought about the drum tempo that the music would have. Then I was biking or flying along M R's street. I remember seeing a cigarette butt on the ground in front of a house. Not sure if I felt mad.

Then I remember being at another house. I remember something about being near P S's house. I might have been babysitting, or just visiting. I left out one side of the house and flew or ran around. When i got to the front I saw that C or L C was smoking! So I quickly turned around to run back inside and avoid the smoke. I remember some ivy around the house.

I recalled those and went back to sleep. I wa spretty confident I would re-remember them later.

(ZZZ)

Round 3 of dreams. I remember accidentally going into a house that wasn't the one I lived in. It was something like number 20 when I lived in number 11. The neighbors house looked similar, too. I remember they had some black cars. One was like a new Mustang. I noticed it wasn't the usual cars.

I looked at a door that was like our front door in waking life, from inside. I remember saying or thinking how I haven't had refined sugar in many years and how this helped me. But I never thought it would really be possible.

I probably forgot a bunch of stuff in the middle. There might have been an annoying vaccuum noise.

Next thing I remember is being near the side of a big gas station. There were two giant, red, Budweiser beer trucks. One had a big tube and was loading the beer into the gas station. I think a third, smaller delivery truck came, too. I was wondering why they were getting so much of the same beer at once.

There was an escalator to the right of that which I followed and went down. It was some kind of store. Maybe a clothing store. There were red long-sleeve shirts which I was supposed to do something with. They came out of a tube. I cut the cuff of the sleeve in half on one of them. Then worried I would be caught. Not sure why I did it. There was an African American guy who I thought was the manager. He didn't seem to notice. When I looked at the end of the shirt sleeve again it didn't look too damaged.

I remember loading up some carts to go back up the escalator. I had a balloon, too. K from S W T was there. He was seeing if I could add more stuff to my carts. I said no. And I needed to go use the bathroom before going back up the escalator.

I got up to the movie area near the food court like in the nearby mall. I think P S and some other people I knew from school were getting ready to go in. I decided not to. Someone like P B was also there. It shifted to a scene where he was eating some food he had made. It was like a hot pudding thing. He kept taking a bite but it was way too hot to eat. He said something about integrating the inner critic in this case. He had to admit he was wrong for trying to eat it when it was too hot. I thought he sounded harsh about it, though.

Then I remember searching for his name on Youtube. The initials were J A. I forgot the actual names. When I typed it in, the suggested search result had 2 names in one line. I had to select just one.

The search results had mainly to do with telekinesis. There were a bunch of titles about telekinesis. There were also other categories. One was like a video game picture but it was titled something like how to avoid soul recycling. Also, the kid said something about needing to study.

One video was a guy with a knife. It talked about how he cut off the lower half of his body to enable him to escape sharks or something like that. Then it showed how he was the most powerful person and could defeat anyone. Then an alien space ship came down that looked like a bug and he couldn't defeat it because it was more than "one" entity. So he fell backwards into the water, giving up. When he landed his knife was on the ground next to him and so he picked it up and used to to fight the alien ship thing.

Another video I clicked on was a mix of a Mario level and a Sonic level. There were spikes and rings. There were Pokemon and fire balls. I remember at one point I became like a Wartortle and had another shell. Then a tube adjusted so I could bring the shell through the tube. Then there was maybe a flag thing at the end of the level.

I'm not sure what happened in the middle parts. But then there was a grass trail thing I was at near a bush. I think I was hiding from family and/or thinking of dream journaling. Then I think it was my dad who came out to find me. He had just bought a new house and was leasing 3 other houses.

This next part was really emotional and I woke up so surprised it had just been a dream. So, my sister was staying in one of the houses. My dad was very mean to her about her staying there and costing him all this money. I could tell his words crushed her spirit and were very harsh. There was no un-doing the emotional damage he had done but I wanted to talk to him so he wouldn't do it again.

He was very drunk. I went to speak with him any way. He was going up some stairs. He did this gesture towards my face that was like patting me on the face. I backed away before he could finish. It was a boundary violation. His face looked really drunk. He had on navy blue. It was night time, later than I am usually up.

Anyway I began to say that it was not right for him to take his anger and financial stress out on her like that. I suggested he get some outside help like a therapist to prevent that from happening again. At first he kind of scoffed. I tried to ensure him that he wouldn't be able to handle his financial stress alone, and if he didn't get help, he'd probably take it out on my sister even more. I said that I'd seen 100s of people in the rooms who had similar problems and got help to stop being abusive. So, no one could do it alone. He had some tears in his eyes.

Eventually, he admitted that he was wrong, at least a little bit. I knew he wasn't done processing it. I understood that running the heat in the spare house was costing him a lot. He said he wasn't even running the heat, she just had to wear a leather jacket. Still, it was 1,800 dollars a month. I was going to suggest that he just stop leasing those extra houses, and only have one or two. But then he decided he had to go to bed. The next thing I knew, he was at the top of the stairs. I figured it would be time for me to go to bed, too. I felt really bad for my sister.

After that round of dreams, I was restless. I made some notes so I could give myself a break from re-playing the dreams in my head. Then, went back to bed.

(ZZZ)

Round 4 of dreams. I might have done RBFA a few times during these.

In the next part I was driving by where the big food store and the bank is. There was something about how I had paid my mom's phone bill. I turned 170 degrees in the road to my right and the guy behind me glared. I was saying how no one should be mad at me because of how I paid my mom's phone bill.

There was a part where I was seated in an auditorium, between a bunch of kids. I guess I was the chaperone of their group. We were given a funny form to fill out. I forgot what exactly was on it, but it was funny. I was splitting us up into 2 teams. It was one long team name and I divided it in a funny place grammatically, where there would be the word "the" two times in a row at the end of the first team name. I don't know if the kids understood my joke.

While the performance went on on stage, there was a little tiny baby on the floor in front of us. I felt bad that she couldn't see but didn't know where her parents were. There was another, even tinier baby in front of her, trying to eat a fortune cookie. I was looking at the tiny baby, thinking that was especially small. The baby seemed to be agitated by the fortune cookie. I guess it was too sharp. A woman picked her up. The person on stage yelled at her care giver saying, "You probably shouldn't be adopting a kid!" I was thinking how that baby would be very traumatized.

There was a part where I had a poster of a bodybuilder guy on my wall. It was to motivate me to get big muscles, too. I had my Pea Protein Powder and a cup of it in water. I added some more protein and tried to drink it. There were funny orbs in it. The next shake I made came out smoother. I wanted to put the shake in my blue water bottle.

Then there was a guy on an exercise bike in my bathroom. It was early morning. He had a go pro kind of thing on his head and a swimmer's cap. He was listening to some kind of audio while repeating, "I can do it" as an affirmation. He only biked for a minute or two. Then I think he went to lift weights. I had some kind of wires on my closet that could hold a camera. He accused me of something.

Then we were listening to some kind of motivational speaker. He was saying how people could go to A A meetings over and over and keep saying the same thing, because they just want to feel loved.

My dream recall was vague and blurry on these. I slept pretty well, though.

Date of Dream: WED 13 JUN - 2018



Dream No. 354 - She Knows About Exclusion

I don't remember much of this dream. From what I can remember, I was at a distorted and older dated version of Stud Park Shopping Centre. I was walking around near Kmart area but I forgot what I was specifically doing at the time. There were people around the place that I tried to speak to but no matter what I did, they wouldn't answer me.

It became night time, in the same area, and there was this function going on, mostly comprising of Killester girls but there were other people as well. Each person had a partner to dance with but I had no one. The feeling of exclusion really got to me and made me feel down, so I tried to call out for Dreamy Wabbi to see if she could do anything about it. There was no response and so I had to keep trying. Eventually, I came out the place and continued calling; still nothing.

After a while of being outside, calling for Dreamy WB, I figured nothing was working and so I came back and wondered into the building. When I was in there though, there was a couple of Killester girls that looked towards me with this sad, petty face and came running up to me. They said they both wanted to dance with me and so we danced in a triangle of three. I said they didn't have to but these girls insisted that they dance with me. What I didn't know is that Dreamy WB must have come and spoken to them behind the scenes without being aware. I then find out that my dance partner was actually supposed to be my brother NB who came late and turned just now. That's all I can remember about this dream.



Dream Tasks
- Have Logan receive harsh penalties from Dreamy WB due to reckless social behaviours (Achieved? No)
- Investigate where my SML postage has gone (Achieved? No)
- Reach the Gyeongbokgung Palace (Achieved? Partially)
- Have Dreamy WB or Murray go to console an upset dream character (Achieved? No)
- In accordance to the "shared dreaming experiment" proceed on locating the moon (Achieved? No)
- Decipher a solution to the maze of chambers (Achieved? No)



Dream 354: Results (Competition #4)
Competition Night: 12
Lucid or Non-Lucid?: Non-Lucid
Dream Guide: None
Emergency Team: None
Eligible For Competition Points: Yes



Points For This Entry: 1.0
Calculation Details:
- Full Non-Lucid Dream (1.0)

+ Previous Total: 57.0
Total Accumulated Points: 58.0