non-lucid

A flying dream. Haven't had one of those in a while.

I'm flying in a overcast sky, with green rolling hills under me. I'm flapping my arms but it feels wrong and clumsy. Slowly it's like my joints move and change, and I feels like my arms turned to wings, and I can feels the movement of the new joints and muscles, I soar up again, lifted by the wind. I reach a house on a bigger hill, with a circonvoluted garden full of nooks and cranies and tiny ponds and waterfalls. It starts raining and I fly inside before my wings turn back to arms. There's friends of mine in there, and I meet up with them. The house is old and musty, strangely elongated with narrow corridor but very high ceiling and windows. We have to swich in light as the outside is dark with the storm. The wooden floor creaks. The rain stops, and we go out to steal something from a bad man. We go inside his tower and climb inside a lift. The bad man sabordage it and it start to fall. I crawl out of it to reach a button that will stop the fall, and as I reach it I tell my friend to jump to cushion the fall. I slam the button and feel the pecuniar sensation in the pit of my stomach that happen when a lift stop suddently, and I'm lifted of the ground for a second. My friends and me run out, fightinh our way through bad guys. I'm carrying a hammer, but my blow are so weak I can't seem to hurt my opponent, and my friends have to save me a couple of time. I reach the bad man owning the place and jump on his back.

Spoiler for stop! hammertime:

I bash is head in with the hammer and his skull crack like a egg. I have to pry the hammerhead out, the bone grinding against itself with sickening sound. I can see inside his head, it's very dark and looks mostly empty, with a strong smell of cold, congelated blood, and a feeling of stickyness.

After that we go in a restaurant and we are served a big roasted turkey. I get some breast, golden crispy skin, juicy with meat over thin ribs bones. I bite through it, bones and all. It's hot, juicy, savory and salty. I have no trouble eating the bones; it had a nice crunch to it and a lot of flavor. The meat itself is melt in your mouth tender.

Morning of November 29, 2015. Sunday.



In the first part of my dream, I am in an unfamiliar city setting. I walk out from an alley with an unknown male. I somehow (based on an implied back story) had previously lifted three sections of sidewalk, boulevard, and parking lot, complete with trees and vines that hang down. We walk under the hovering features, each about the size of one and a half lots. They are hovering about fifteen feet up. In the back of my mind, I am thinking that it is safe to walk under them since a part of me is likely still focused on them.

The main segment of my dream involves a style of dreaming that began when I was very young. In fact, it seems like some sort of continuation (at least on one level) from “Frankenstein Closes the World” from when I was only four years of age (April 9, 1965). It involves part of the setting being “blocked” like a continuous wall preventing access to a certain direction (in this case possibly north). Over time in my dreams, the number and type of “station keepers” changed. One of my first “station keepers” (as I refer to them) was probably the Frankenstein Monster (Boris Karloff version). That is the one that appears here. There are other elements that were more common when I was very young, including even the first part above with the hovering sections of the city (also beginning around age four). However, I actually “feel” about ten or eleven years of age in my dream.

Part of the situation seems borrowed from the original “Dark Shadows” board game I had when very young. It had a set of miniature plastic skeletons and a cardboard coffin. A recurring situation occurs here where “ancient papers” are found and I realize they had, instead, been very recently printed (this may be a play on a dream freshly rendering something implied to otherwise be “ancient”). In this case, there seems to be some sort of challenge to get into a mock mausoleum (though integrated into the high and long wall) but which at first seems like a “door to Satan”. Even this part stems from when I was very young. The other male, who seems to be interested in some sort of “contest” seems very wary about going up to the “door to Satan”, though in front of the door, there is something related to the contest or a rare potential discovery. I seem to remember that Satan does not exist and decide it is probably an archetype of the subconscious that we will be facing. I then remember that the subconscious does not exist as popularly defined (only different levels of awareness, both internal and external, including the supraconscious and the Source) and feel oblivious to any concerns the other male may have (even though I am not lucid).

As such, I go up to the wall with the recess (or short hallway) and a section of the wall comes out like a drawer, at ground level (this may be a play on post office associations, or a PO drawer since “I hug PO Virgo” is directly encoded in my full name and also the date of the original dream version was on my wedding anniversary years before it became as such). It has a coffin which is about one-quarter the size of an adult coffin. I open it, expecting to find macabre remains of some kind, and there are miniature “real” skeletons, one of a girl in fetal position with long white hair and only about five inches high. There are also a couple cartoon-like (unrealistic) skulls as well as some random debris and cobweb. It still seems somewhat “ancient”, but as mentioned earlier, the “ancient parchments” look freshly printed. This and another dream of this date had precognitive facets related to a false pregnancy (pseudocyesis) - which explains the miniature skeletal girl in the fetal position. Frankenstein, on the other hand (on one level), has become a symbol for normal people in mainstream society in relationship to pop culture, the media, and authority; lumbering and unintelligent.

Finally, I open the “door to Satan” and behind it is an extension of the hallway recess of the wall. Boris Karloff’s Frankenstein monster appears, walking mummy-like. He goes after the other male, but it is rather amusing. Both of them move slowly, somewhat like a slowed-down “Keystone Cops” event (also often written as “Keystone Kops”). I decide to see what is farther down the hallway, but the other male comes back around, moving in an arc around the left side of the wall and coming back from the other direction, with the horror movie monster in pursuit but not threatening me, just in the way. I avoid colliding with the stumbling creature and watch the “chase” passively.

[Notes]:
- So the first half of this takes place in my normal sleep, and the second after having tried WBTB for the first time.
- I can't be sure of the order of events in the first half, but I can in the second.

[Dream begins]:
I'm on this course out in the woods in the mountains. We're all practicing archery drills. See picture below. You shoot at a target, run to the target, and shoot the next one in a square path. I eventually finish up with a few and I go and hang out at the chillout spot, which was an open flat area that jutted out of the mountain we were on, so we could see all the other mountains. I talked with some people here; possibly AW?
Attachment 8898

Note: Throughout the dream I had been getting closer and friendlier with this AW, initials for a person I know. Now, in the dream it was a slightly different version of her, but it was still her.

I'm waiting for the morning bus, and it seems to be running late. I head up the hill towards where it should come from, and a couple things fly by... I think one of them was a hang glider. Eventually the bus comes over and I go and hop on (the middle line lunch lady is driving).

So I'm talking with AW. It turns out we both have to get out of school for some reason (dentist's appointment?) and be on the interstate (actually 13). Eventually I get out of school and hit the road with someone. It's raining really hard as we go eastbound, and we take a look at the toll booths as we go by. They had windshield wipers on them that were flapping vigorously so the booth people could see what the driver was doing. Eventually we're on our way back and we see each other in the road.

Suddenly, I'm at this abandoned industrial building with the rest of school, and suddenly we're all told to move into the building by Darth Vader and the emperor. A ton of troops surround us and direct us into the building. As I'm going up with WC, I'm holding a blaster and take a look out the window, thinking they were going to shoot me. They didn't. I lose the rifle and keep going up. Eventually I meet with S (and AH?) and we talk for a bit. SH is slapping his mom on the butt and she's slapping him on the abs and vice versa, telling each other how nice their butts and abs are... then SH tells her that it's the nicest part of her and goes back into the building. She goes and talks with us, and says "I'm not perfect?"

[Wake up.]

Note: At this point, I woke up in a natural awakening at ~7:45AM. I figured I'd try doing some WBTB since I figured I might still be able to have a dream. I logged the previous dream, then decided to go back to sleep with lucid dreams and goals in mind. For probably fifteen minutes straight I kept on waking up from discovering I was in HI dreamlets. Hopefully I can figure out how to get past this. Eventually, I had the following dream.

[Dream begins]:
Dad and I were going somewhere. I get in the SUV. Sweetie jumps up on the (other) SUV and I tell her to get off, then dad comes over and tosses her off, but she lands on the Leaf. Dad gets in with me and we start to drive away. She follows us down. I look back, and she's waving to us! She trots down by the creek pines and lays down and keeps doing it. Then I realize that it was a peacock making it look like she was doing that. We drive up the hill and dad says "Yep, she's a good dog". Then I thought about peacock feathers for a little bit (and a bundle of them).

I found myself in a mansion. I walk around for a bit and I find J from MPC chillin' in a closet. His mom is in the living room. I look at him and say, "Hey man, what's up?" He doesn't register me, and just keeps looking off into the distance. His mom scolds him lightly for being so rude to a visitor, and he acknowledged me. He pulls out two DVD's: one is Star Wars and the other is Star Trek. He says "Hey, at the next MPC meet we're gonna watch these." I look at him and his mom questioningly, and say "Yeah.... I don't think so..."

[Wake up.]

I am at a friend's party, lots of successful and fancy, hipstery people are there in her large, wooden house, we are in the attic room, it is wooden and shadowy. I don' really have much in common with all the jocks and women dressed in very nice clothes. I ask if I can have some of my friends come over as well, they are geekier but I'd have someone to talk to. I vouch for them and she lets them come. I also see my sister there and I feel a bit more relaxed.

I'm talking to one of my geeky friends. He mentions how mean and horrible the people in the party have been to him over the years. Although everyone is an adult now, the direct harassment has now turned into a cold condescension, I feel for my friend. A big event is about to happen, people get into a circle as some kind of speech is going to be given. Right as one of the mean, good looking and condescending jocks is going to speak my geeky friend tackles him to the floor and pandemonium breaks out, people are all over the place tearing things apart.

My hipstery friend who knows the host says this is horrible, really bad, the jock was being interviewed on live TV, now it is ruined, there is no way to fix this. He doesn't right out blame me for vouching for him, but I sense the tension. Secretly I don't feel bad at all for what happened. The jock got what was coming to him. This is karma.

A new scene, we are in a school gym hall, a new party, the lights are very dim and atmospheric. My hipstery friend's girlfriend comes up to me by a table, I ask what's up. She says things are well. My hipstery friend is collecting money for the damages that happened in the party before, the house was wrecked. I feel a pang of guilt and panic. Why did I even go to that stupid party in the first place? I wake up relieved.

Vague dreams throughout the night, no recall.

In the last dream I was in a car going through an old city like Stockholm in the back seat. To mmy left I see my friend who I met by chance yesterday on the bus. We talk a little bit. As if (our?) parents are in the front driving the car. I hear yelling, a girl cries out for help. My sister (who is a completely different person and looks totally different) is not in the car. The parents swerve around and try to find out where the yelling is coming from. I get out of the car and start running, as if I can make it faster on foot.

I hear her as the car passes me, I can begin pinpointing the sound. I find her in a bus, men in uniforms sit as she yells, apathetic, they look like law enforcement. As the bus tries to pull away from the curb I stand in front of it and start tearing away the mirrors and wipers, trying to start a confrontation.

I turn around and see a committee, men in suits and women dressed very professionally. I demand to speak with my sister, I ask what she she being charged with. They are stonewalled and silent. This infuriates me. I have to stay in front of the bus so it doesn't start driving off. In my desperation I begin to try to intimidate all of them, I stare into their eyes intentionally, saying I will go after their children, after them, if they don't let me talk to my sister and ask how she is doing. Just let me talk to her so she can tell me what she is being accused of. Silence is my answer.

I drop to my knees defeated and lyrics pass through my head, I see them stream before me. Life in black America.

I went to bed around 01:00. Couldn't fall asleep for a long while. I woke up around 09:00 and started typing this some 15 minutes later.

Dragonball
I'm a spectator. There's some Dragonball stuff going on. There's an enemy which needs to be defeated *duh*, though the situation doesn't feel tense. Goku and Vegeta are taking care of it. They fusion and I think they form Gogeta. Somehow there's still another Goku left. He seems a bit retarded. An explanation comes from somewhere that having Goku multiply and then fusion really stretches his capabilities.. so this Goku is pretty much useless. From somewhere in the distance some other characters can be heard. It's about the necessity of someone reproducing with someone else because that kid is gonna be important for this battle. I think it might be Piccolo who said that. A girl protests, saying that the couple should be allowed to fall in love first, or something along those lines. She also mentions that Piccolo doesn't have to worry anytime soon about getting similar responsibilities. I'm just wondering how long this battle will drag on if they have to wait for a baby to be born first.

Shower
I'm in the kitchen in my student house. I turn around and see that there's a second fridge in the kitchen. It's standing in front of the stove. It looks new and hasn't been connected yet. I open it for a moment to have a peek. Nice. Must be Karen's. I also notice that the kitchen is somewhat cleaner. Lianne has cleaned up half the mess she left on the counter. I walk to my room. I consider offering Karen €5 so that I can use her fridge as well. I also want to borrow her vacuum cleaner again.

In my room I dress down until my boxershort. I notice that my door is still wide open. Ah no big deal. I'm standing in a spot where you can't really see me. I close my light coloured curtains. It takes quite some effort. It gets stuck a bit and at some point I'm afraid that the railing will fall down. I manage to do it though. I take something with me. I think my white shirt with green stripes. I walk out of my room. Shaun and Lianne are standing in the hallway talking about something. I walk past and say hi. Shaun says hi back and Lianne just ignores me. Bitch.

I'm in the shower. It's very spacious and looks more like a garage than a shower. Something odd strikes me, but I can't immediately put my finger on it. I see that there are two other doors to the shower. One of them seems looked, but another one is wide open. I take a look. It's another shower room. This one must be Krijn's, as it's adjacent to his room. I guess I was wrong, he does have his own shower. I recall misinforming Bart about it. I lock the door from my side so he won't come in while I'm showering. I turn on the shower and let the water flow for a while so it can heat up while I undress. I pull my shirt over my head. Somehow I know that the water is almost instantly hot. Normally I let it run for a while first though, cause it takes a while.

I think I was getting close to becoming lucid. I noticed quite a bit of odd things in the shower.

Singing contest
In that same shower area (which looks like a garage), I'm now just a spectator. My girlfriend is there with a guy who is apparently a famous Indonesian singer. He has applied some light blue make up around his eyes. It's a whole big stripe. He seems like a weirdo. There's someone else, I think a girl. My girlfriend is singing (with a mic I think). It's some sort of contest. She's wearing a cheerleader type of outfit, just for the show. In the end she doesn't win. The famous singer says some things to her. I don't understand it at all. I assume that they're talking in Indonesian and I assume that I can't understand because this is tv and they simply talk too fast for me. The only word I really hear is the French 'vous'. She didn't win. She's not sad though. Then some effects occur, a couple of fade to/from black.

earlier:

+ tennis. Playing on court, with pro (lesson). Arguing over "out" call at corner, but I was right there. Ball the size of a cherry? Go to try to find advanced service machine in [foreign country] store. They all are just auto ball shooters not what I need. Someone is talking about a pro's amazing serve, I visualize his serve, the kick-off from the ground and the follow-through

+ (f) trying to choose the right way on the freeway

+ (couple others, forgot)

later:

+ work epic:
arrive to building, lunch buffet (2 stations: squid salad (big whole squids), and some other grey/green mush),

anger SB (don't let her hang her stuff in my office), she stomps off, I try to get her back to apologize but she's too mad.

see JoDu (childhood neighborhood) and friend walking through the halls, they see me and take me to their meeting, they're in charge of documenting the history of a large atrium building (kind of weird for a job assignment I think). In the beginning they needed to call in actors to populate the atrium. Someone else was in charge of the license plates (?!?). I thought what if they hired a guy who played the saxophone, what if he didn't show up, etc. (did he have funny teeth?).

I'm on the 2nd floor balcony looking down to the ground floor, lots of employees are mulling around. A girl who doesn't work at that company comers in and looks sort of lost, she goes up to another girl and announces "I've been challenged to sleep with somebody in a very cold room!" I run down to the first floor a bunch of guys are crowding around her saying "I know a cold room!" "No, no, *I* know a cold room!". There's some guy there I'm wrestling with, I bite his head, he has weird grey-purplish skin. He calls to her "Hey, you want to go get a motel room!?" She answers "Yes!". I say to the guy "you get the heck out of here with your freaky grey skin!"

I'm in a relatively deserted area, there's a glass wall/door to the outside, a man is standing there with his face against the glass and wants in the back door, another employee is close to the door but ignores the guy and moves away, we should definitely not let him in. I'm inspecting and playing "musical sticks" that if you wack them against something make a chiming/wooden flute sound. I'm going to go play these in Africa? Trying to find the right stick, some don't sound right, some sound better, one comes apart in multiple pieces.

Walking down a hallway I come across an ice cream/smoothie station, I see bright purple ice cream. There is a menu of available flavors, cherry something, cherry jubilee(?), etc., I want that, the attendant motions that there are a bunch of already prepared drinks/ice creams on the counter, I reach for one but another guy steps in front, and pour himself a big glass from the one I wanted, I'm annoyed that he's going to take it all. Then I realize he actually emptied his glass back into the served container, now I need a fresh one and am waiting for it. The annoying guy's head pops up through a trap door in the floor inside the kiosk, and opens his mouth, and the attendant pours a stream of red smoothie in to the guy's mouth. The attendant finally pours me a cup that I'm holding but he gets is all over my shirt, I turn away in disgust and wonder, "Is this some sort of first day at work prank?"

I go outside, near the main entrance to the building, outside on the lawn there is some sort of HR festival, I hear some women discussing ideal placement for such-and-such a display. I ignore this first area. Then I'm walking through an area of people sitting on bar stools. I notice a hot girl with a shoulder-and-sleeveless top, with a nice view of side boob and bra. There is a woman attendant who walks by her and straightens out the hot girl's bra, (because the girl and the others on the bar stools are not allowed to move). The attendant speaks and sounds like another girl I had a crush on at a previous company but I do not turn around. I then see ex-gf SB again who falls down off her stool and and breaks her shoulder, I go down to help her up: I say "Hey, sweetie, hey baby, are you OK?" She answers angrily, "I'm not your sweetie!" I leave her there, she's still angry at me.

Some of us leave in a car going to a meeting in another building, this is a huge campus, a guy says "it's ridiculous that they put the XYZ group in the cell phone division". We finally arrive somewhere in a parking garage, we're lost, woman in garage who works in supermarket in that building says "there are lots of employees who shop here on their way home, you can ask them where your building is," good idea, I have to fit in, so I pick up a trendy long complex pastry item in a cellophane wrapper and I will pretend I eat these all the time, even though I just got it out of a vending machine. There is a group of girls outside the glass walls of the stairway and they are laughing.

Didn't manage to reach my 3 dream quota again which I'm fine with ^_^

Dream 1 - Lizzy McGuire
I was in a room with a lot of other people, I think it had a house party atmosphere. There was a girl I talked to who reminded me of Lizzy McGuire, but after googling this I realize it was Lindsay Lohan who it actually looked like. I can only remember moving around from room to room, maybe with a drink in my hand?

Dream 2 - Stranded at Piha
I'm at Piha beach (quite a well-known beach in Auckland, it even has a TV show - Piha Rescue - about it), I think I'm with a bunch of people on a school trip. We have to take a plane or something to get around to another beach just around the corner because the tide isn't low enough to walk to it yet. I don't actually recall flying there though.. We're at the other beach now, I remember talking with a couple people and watching as the waves crashed on the shore. Suddenly the tide rises really high, the water pours onto the beach and floods the shore. There's only about 3 metres of space between the shoreline and the cliff behind us. I'm rushing over in the direction of Piha beach which is cut off from us by a headland. I run up the side of the headland, it's only like 2 metres high on our side, yet on the other side there is a 50m drop into a deep estuary. I peer down over the cliff and wonder if we can all jump over to swim back? A shark! I see a 2-3m long shark swimming about in the estuary channel. Damn... It isn't too big, it might not attack us? Too risky. Eventually we all decide to head back via the other alternatives: plane, skyline gondola and another way... A boat I think? I end up taking the plane, it's pretty small and can't fit more than 10 people max. We're flying now, wait a second something is wrong I think we start to plummet a bit because something is stopping the plane flaps from moving. Looking in front of me I realize I've been resting my arms on something that's stopping the plane from maneuvering properly, oops O_O. I move my arms and we set ourselves a bit straighter but... It wasn't enough. I think we crash land though it was more like a shudder and violent sudden stop.

Dream experience: 3 (pretty standard dream, the shark experience was the most exciting part)
Dream awareness: 1 (not very aware but used basic problem-solving)

Bed @ 0040
Woke @ 0350.

Experimental vaccines
I'm managing a line of people who have come for experimental vaccines. I'm at the front of the line waving people forward when it's their turn. I can see other lines of other people, but I don't know what they're for. Each person in my line is getting a different experimental vaccine, and I know that some people have really bad reactions or side-effects to them, some of which are life-changingly bad. These people are being vaccinated right in front of me, and I'm afraid that if any of them have any of these complications, I might be affected due to proximity.


Alternate-reality Picard
Picard is at the back of an airplane. He's using something to appear in our reality, but it's not working right. He's mostly here, but he's very cold and having a hard time breathing. He kneels down and breaks something on the floor - trying not to be seen doing so - and starts to warm his hands over it. It seems that whatever he broke is the device that's sending him across realities, and by whacking it he made it work better.


Defense tribes
I see five small tribes, each in its own circular camp, forming a line * * * * * dividing two areas of land, protecting one area from invaders coming from the other area. I've snuck into the camp on one end and been discovered. The people who found me aren't at all pleased with me, but they're also not attacking me, so I decide to try to win them over. After all, I'm an explorer, not an invader. I decide to break the ice by getting everyone a fresh drink. Moving slowly and unthreateningly, I move around collecting their old glasses. Now I'm walking through a field full of small groups of people. I'm having to be really careful to walk right down the middle of the groups since a lot of people have their legs stuck out and I don't want to trip.


Late-night phone call
It's after midnight, and I get a phone call. At first I assume it's junk, but as I pick up my phone to hang up I see that it's actually Ronne. I realize it must be important and try to answer, but I can't - I must have waited too long and dumped him to voicemail.


Explosive fun
I'm in a tunnel system using explosives to unearth fish. They're somehow trapped in rock, and after the explosive blows the rock apart they're able to swim away. I'm amazed that they're able to survive such an ordeal. I keep going back into one area, blowing deeper and deeper back into the rock. Now I'm trying another area, but the fish are more aggressive. Now I'm watching someone try to blow up a medicine cabinet; but instead of blowing up it just gets blown off the wall. Somehow I know that a crack formed in back, that the force of the explosion found the crack, and that the full force of the explosion passed through the crack and expanded between all went through, blowing the cabinet off the wall. The wall itself is completely undamaged.


BTB @ 0400.

Fragments:
I'm wandering around with a half-broken bottle. Its neck snapped off really easily - I can't believe how cheaply it was made.

I'm wandering around what seems to be a cafeteria. There are lots of empty tables, but I'm the only one here. Somehow it has something to do with changing prisoner's gender and sending them to colonize a new planet.

I'm in a huge tent listening to my supervisor and the job foreman talk; my company has provided the foreman with something he need to complete the job here. The foreman is telling us about the risks and rewards of this project; depending on whether he finishes early or late, there are significant risks as well as rewards.

I'm at home in my family room. Some men in suits are setting up outside for someone to make a presentation. Now he's talking, but I'm getting echo; it turns out it's because I'm hearing him live as well as over a speaker phone someone turned on. There's something about my bluetooth headset battery being almost dead.

On 11/27/2015 I drank a whole bottle of new Amsterdam during the day and took 100 mg of 5 HTP before bed at 1 am. I had a very profound and interesting dream today.

At first I dreamed of flying towards a large super cell storm which had red color about it in a few places. In a dream a voice told me that the cloud had devils inside it or something like that. The dream changed and I was on the beach alone. Behind me were summer homes (dachas in Russian/Ukranian) it was weird because it looked like an American beach and behind me were Russian houses and plants. Another voice told me to shoot 3 times inside the storm to create a large wave in order to ride on it to another side of town. I remember again in the dream I was on the beach with a handgun pointing not just towards a storm cloud but a monster tornado in the ocean I shot 3 times as the tornado opened up and crated a massive wave that looked like it was about 100 ft in the air i remember i ran away from it and timed it perfecly and ended up in a different side of the town. I then went back to the beach and began to ride huge massive waves that I crated so I was not afraid despite them being really black and huge.

I also at some point in time looked to my left on the beach and noticed the tornado inside the water moved far away now but it was still creating massive weights for me which i kept riding and had fun with.

The dream was over and it almost seemed like really life in a few days I will use galantamine again at lower doses.

Woke up at 7 a.m after going to sleep at 4 a.m, read a couple of stuff before going back to sleep, stubbornly.

I ended up in a FA, with a incredibly loud buzzing sound zipping across my room. I look up and catch a glimpse of a enormous wasp, with a bulging abdomen in bright yellow stripped with shiny black. I pull the blanket over my head to hid from it, but I feel heavy and sluggish.
I'm in a train and get out at the station. A old man with very few hairs left walks up in my face and start spouting non-sense, I try to flee.

Finally, I'm in the dark, laying in my bed. I feel someone climbing next to me, then pulling me against himself. I recognize Eli's body, his warmth and smell and burrow in his arms.

I went to bed around 01:30 last night and just now (10:00) crawled out of my hammock, after having been awake for ~20 minutes.

Grey mouse
I'm walking in a former school building. You can still easily see that it used to be a school building, but it now serves as a student housing complex. I can't recall having any purpose for walking there. I just keep on going. At some point I see a former housemate from a distance in one of the rooms. He makes a motion to provide me with the right directions. Eventually I'm near the top of some stairs. Right next to it, in a sort of cubicle with very low walls, is a girl studying. She has a bit of a nerdy look about her, a bit of a grey mouse. She isn't pretty, but she also isn't ugly. She's working on something that requires difficult calculations. She sees me and asks me if I can help her with it. Sure I can try. My area of expertise is something entirely different though, so I doubt that I can be very helpful. The area at the stairs is very narrow and more people want to pass from below and after a while someone wants to go down as well. It requires a little bit of acrobatics for me to get into the cubicle. I think another guy, who was behind me on the stairs, is also having a look. I feel like asking me to help her is more of a ruse from her to get my attention. I'm not interested, but I let it slide and attempt to help anyway. We move to another table, perhaps 3 metres away. For some reason I'm holding her black iPhone in my left hand and my own black iPhone in my right hand. On the lockscreen I can see her name, but I can't recall it anymore. It was a slightly unconventional name. I turn her phone towards her to show that I'll need her passcode to get in. She tells me the code. I think it was 1010 or 2222. After a while I tell her this is a bit of a mindfuck, having the same phones in both hands. I wanted to do something on my phone, but did it on hers instead. I went to her pictures. I think there are some old black/white pictures of a baby.

Fragment
» I've received a reply from an Indonesian man. He is the supervisor for the internship that I want to do. It's an email and the level of English is just horrible. I can't make much out of it. It leaves me feeling a bit frustrated.

*shows up three years later* oops. I sort of haven't been on in a while, but I've been getting more into lucid dreaming again and I decided I should come back to log my dreams somewhere other than my phone notes, if only for record keeping purposes, lol. I haven't been keeping track of how many lucids I've had since I've last been here, hence the question marks in the title, but, eh.

NON DREAM - DREAM - LUCID

I wake up and check my phone and see that it says 12:35pm. Shit. I slept in past my morning class, and if I don't get a move on immediately, I'll miss my afternoon class. I jump out of bed and see my roommate and say, "Dude, I slept in and now I'm gonna be late!" She responds with a halfhearted "Aw, damn." She knows when my classes are, the least she could've done was wake me up. The nerve.

Anyways, I rush outside and find myself in the lecture hall where my class is. For some reason, though, I'm still freaking out and trying to figure out a way to get to class, even though I'm basically there. I see my friend E and I run up to her, yelling "I missed my first class and now I'm gonna be late for my second!" She grabs my shoulders and gives me a hug to calm me down, saying "It's okay, if you hurry now you can still make it in time." I realize I don't have my backpack. Apparently I left it in another classroom, so E comes with me to look for it. When I sneak inside the classroom where my backpack is, the lights are dimmed and the professor is lecturing away. I try to stay as quiet as possible so I don't interrupt while I slink over to grab my stuff, but E walks in behind me and yells "DON'T WORRY EVERYONE, SHE'S JUST GRABBING HER STUFF!" I cringe and say "Stop it, this isn't even my class!" She stops yelling and apologizes.

I make it out of that room with my backpack in tow, and I start walking down the hall toward the exit. As I'm walking, I pass my friend A who, in real life, goes to school on the other side of the country. "A? What are you doing here?" I say. Before he can speak, I say "Sorry, I'd love to stay and chat, but if I don't haul ass right now I'll miss my class. I'll see you later!" and then I turn and keep running.

When I make it outside, I'm standing at the bottom of a hill. I can see the bus stop at the top of the hill, and I try to walk toward it. However, I can barely move because my legs are like lead and I'm making no progress. I see the bus pull up to the stop and tears start to well in my eyes because I know that if I don't catch this bus, I'll miss class. Damn, I think to myself, this is just like in dreams when you just can't...oh. Oh, wait.

I put two and two together and realize I'm dreaming, confirming with a few reality checks. I quickly ditch my backpack and abandon my attempts to climb the hill, deciding to sit on the curb instead. I spend some time just staring at my hands, realizing just how strange looking they are and how wonky my fingers look. I grow another finger. Ew. I also paid attention to the grass around me, noticing how vividly green and soft looking it was. Basically, I tried to calmly engage multiple senses so that I could stabilize the dream.

I look up and see three people come out of the building: my friend A from earlier, this other kid I went to high school with, and 90's Leonardo DiCaprio. Nice. It's an odd group, but I'm not complaining. Especially about Leo (who I stand up and greet with a kiss because I love myself and I deserve it). I invite everyone to sit down on the side of the curb with me. I pull out my phone and we start taking selfies, and I say "Wouldn't it be cool if these showed up on my phone in real life? Except they won't because NONE OF THIS IS REAL!" They don't really react to that for some reason. This kind of reminds me to deal with a problem I usually have in lucids: communicating with DCs. Mostly I find that I'm always the one doing the talking, and hardly ever will I hold a decent conversation with a DC. I ask Leo how his day was. He just smiles and nods at me. "No," I say, "use your words." He's clearly making an effort, but he's struggling.

Suddenly, I hear a heavy Russian accent say "Here, you need to eat." I look up and see Wanda Maximoff from the latest Avengers movie standing above me. In one hand she has a dark brown wicker basket, and her other hand is holding a red fruit rollup, outstretched to me. I thank her and take it, and it tastes just like a normal fruit rollup. I think Wanda's food offering was a way to help me stabilize the dream because at this point my lucidity was getting a little shaky (a device to help Leo talk had appeared randomly in my hand and I didn't question it at all). Basically, my subconscious was like, "You're losing it, dipshit. Eat something." Thanks, subconscious.

Anyways, I'm sitting there eating this fruit rollup when suddenly I get an idea. "Hey Wanda," I say, "where's your dad?" (For those who don't know--in the Marvel universe, Wanda's dad is Magneto, aka Erik Lehnsherr. Erik is played by Michael Fassbender. Michael Fassbender is a beautiful man. I had some saucy ulterior motives.) She gives me a strange look before saying, "He's inside." I thank her and run back into the building I had just previously exited, except this time, instead of it being my lecture hall, it was my mom's house. I'm pretty familiar with the place.

I start calling out Erik's name in hopes of finding him, since I find that I'm better at finding people in dreams instead of just summoning them, but to no avail. I walk into the living room and see my sister lounging on the couch. I ask her if she's seen Erik. She says, "Yeah, I think he's over behind that gate." I look over and see one of those gates meant for blocking off babies from getting into certain places, but it was blocking off the area by our front door. Behind the gate, there are huge piles of blankets and laundry. I walk over and start digging around, but I don't find Erik. My sister laughs and says "Just kidding, I have no idea where he is. I don't even know who Erik is." I yell at her for wasting my time and walk into the kitchen.

Erik is trash, I think to myself, so he's probably in the trash. And if he's not, he should be. I open the cupboard under the sink and grab a new trash bag. For some reason I feel like having a trash bag will help me find him. From the other room, I hear my mom yell, "LEAVE HIM ALONE." I respond with a resounding "NO."

Then I wake up. I'm pretty happy since this was the first lucid I've had in a long time. It's motivating me to really get back into the swing of things, if only to continue my desperate search for Erik Lehnsherr.

And yes, I did check my phone's camera roll when I woke up, but there were no selfies with 90's Leo DiCaprio :/

Morning of November 28, 2015. Saturday.



Yet again I am seemingly living in Cubitis, or at least in a version of my Cubitis bedroom (though there is not much furniture whereas the room had been crowded with furniture prior to my move), though I am also aware that I am married and living with my family as they are now, yet somehow, I perceive that I may only be around twenty years of age.

It seems late at night or a couple hours before sunrise, perhaps. All of my lights are on and the room is bright at first (unrealistically bright, in fact, though the scene is very vivid). However, there is eventually a strange mood, a sense of someone being outside in our front yard, and my lights go out at this point - though there also seems to be a bit of light and movement outside, perhaps from a flashlight shining through the curtains or a brief flash of the light from a police car (perceived as approaching from the north). I am wondering how this happened. Perhaps someone shut off the power from outside - yet I also get the impression that I may have mentally caused the power to go off of as an act of self-preservation. I decide to move away from all the tall windows so that my shadow is not seen to anyone outside, which is a bit illogical, as my shadow would have been more likely seen when my lights were on (typical skewed dream “logic”).

I carefully go to the middle west window and look out and see an unknown male (perhaps in his thirties) and another male to his left who may be his son. There are a couple backpacks lying on our lawn to their right and some of their apparel seems militia-related but not all. They are standing near the center of the front yard. They do not see me at any point. A strange event occurs. The older male fires a bazooka at our roof and I am aware that he is doing this because he is angry about our satellite dish and communications technology and I get a strong impression he does not want me or anyone in my family to communicate with anyone. He does not seem to want to destroy our household, just stop us from giving accurate information to people as well as preventing us from getting information from people or the outside world in general.

I go out to the carport and casually say hello to them after writing down the license plate number of their car (parked adjacent to the highway past our front yard), which is six digits in all and begins with a “three”, though I did not hold the number in my mind long enough to remember what it was now. It was “three” followed by a space, followed by three numbers (possibly 467), another space, and two more numbers (possibly 92). Somehow, I take it to actually be a telephone number such as one seen in a so-called infomercial (even though again, there are only six digits).

They walk into our carport, seeming uncertain of what to expect, but come into our house. The older male sits in an armchair (facing south and to the left of the implied carport door) and his son sits perpendicular to him to my right (facing west) as I am facing north, looking directly at the older male. The room and layout becomes unknown. It still seems to be implied to be my bedroom, but the carport door actually seems to lead to a hall at this point. (It is so typical of dreams to change layouts of a house at different times, as I had just used that door to go out to the carport and back into my room and now it leads to a hall.)

I very quickly pick up my large Olympic barbell (almost without thinking, as it had been leaning to my right against my chair) and jam it into his mouth (still remaining seated in my armchair and he in his across the room from me), all the way to the back of his neck, it seems. He is still alive but cannot move or speak and his eyes are bulging in utter fear. Although his face is generically human, it is too oddly rendered to be a real human face (typical of some dream types and scenes). His teenage son is very worried and remains seated and does not do anything even though they had brought their weapons into our house. He pleads with me not to hurt his father to any greater extent. I tell my wife Zsuzsanna, who is walking easterly by in the (fictional) hall, to call the police, even though I get a vague sense they may not like my “mistreatment” of this criminal, though that concern is not wholly emergent at any point.

Went to bed later again as I was exposed to TV for the first time in a long while.. Where does time even go?
I'll have to restart my dream recall goal (3 dreams every night for 3 days in a row).

Dream - School trippin'
I was on a school bus, we were going on a field trip somewhere. I had a lot of bags (these were the bags that I had left in my flat to be picked up by a moving truck) and I remember unloading them from the bus storage. So many bags, I can't possibly move them in one go... I pick up 2 bags and follow along with everyone else, deciding to make a couple trips to get everything to wherever we're headed. I distinctly recall there being a very realistic sexy big breasted (she had a boob job) brunette woman (in her thirties?) at some point who was guiding me. I don't think she appeared to me in person, but may have been an image on my phone. She had no shirt or bra either . There was also another girl that was the same age as me, she was a strikingly beautiful voluptuous blonde. She gets replaced suddenly by a feminine looking guy with short brown hair... Wait a second... Is that a wig? I think to myself that I think it's actually the girl in disguise. I continue to a playground train which we're supposed to climb onto. It's literally a playground, yet it's somehow a train? I climb up the bar ladder on to the wooden platform, Katie tells me that I shouldn't hog all the space because of how many bags I have. I say that I won't... So bossy. I dump my bags into a corner and climb back down to the bark ground, Katie comes up to me again with 2 of my other bags. Huh? She went and brought my bags for me? "Thanks, how many bags are left?" I say, she responds by telling me there's 3 left (she says it in a way that makes me think she's feigning that she doesn't care, though it's really nice of her to help me out). I think to myself that 3 can't be right.. I should only have 2 more bags? I don't stop to think about this properly. I look at my phone and I see that sexy big breasted brunette woman again, she's in a .gif with the brown haired guy. The woman has her breasts bouncing left to right (they're huge ( . Y . )), the gif is pretty well-made but I can see where the frame resets, the guy isn't doing much except trying to look cool. I notice that there are 3 loops in the .gif, they each play twice before seamlessly switching to the next one. WHOA! Suddenly it switches again... I notice that the guy has turned back into that beautiful blonde, I knew it was a wig! She's in tight-fitting gym clothes with her stomach showing and she's swinging her hips from side to side. It's incredibly hot . The entire scene of seeing this .gif on my phone wasn't very long but it was very vivid and very intense. The end

Dream experience: 8 (pretty standard dream but the girls were incredibly vivid and the experience was quite intensive and has been on my mind most of the day)
Dream awareness: 2-3 (Not aware enough to be lucid, but I was aware of inconsistencies during the dream. Awareness reached ~3 during the .gif part due to vividness and emotions)