Killer Whales Walking along a beach. There are lots of people around, apparently getting ready for a festival. It is like a regatta, with lots of boats, but apparently there are killer whales involved. I think the boats are going out to fish for the whales, or something. There is a ring of buoys marking off an area near the shore, beyond which are the boats, I think. I wonder if the buoys are marking off a safe place for people to swim. People are out in the water, some of them swimming after the boats. I think to myself that I wouldn’t want to be out there among the killer whales... I feel like the following was a separate dream from "Killer Whales", but since I'm not sure and the setting is similar I will only count this as one dream for the competition. Walking along a beach with my brother. We are in Florida, or some place. We are also naked. There might be more than the two of us. There is something about the sand – I might be noticing how nice the sand feels on my feet or something. We come across a rock outcropping that we start to climb. Some other people are walking along the beach, and I hope to climb far enough up that they won’t notice that I’m naked. I get up to a high spot, but then get kind of nervous about being up so high and climb down a little. The dream transitions into a third person account of people on a climbing trip. They are climbing back down, but in order to do so properly they are supposed to trust their guide to lift them part of the way down. The rock outcropping seems more like a house at this point. Aunt J’s At Aunt J’s. My family is there. This might have been related to an earlier part in which I’m with the family in a hotel (for the sake of this account I’ll assume that it was). We are in this hotel place, at breakfast. The family is sitting around the table, and I go to get some food. There is also some coffee available, in carafes in a separate nook...At some point I decide to walk over to my cousin’s house. At about the same time as I walk in, she comes in another door. I think she might be a little disturbed to find me prowling around the house while she was gone, so I explain that I just walked in. After a bit of talking, I learn that her three dogs (which she doesn’t have in waking life) have gone missing. We aren’t too worried, it just seems like they went outside and haven’t come back yet. We go out and I think I call for the dogs. At this point, either her dogs come back or someone else’s dog comes running in. There is something about the dog seeming vicious, but me trying to get along with it. Then the dream changes into a couple of people including myself carrying heavy doors into a garage. Two of them carry a set of two doors, and I carry one by myself, playfully bragging about being able to do it on my own. I think one of the other two people is my brother, who makes some kind of retort. At Aunt J’s, I think. I go upstairs to use the bathroom. For some reason I’m there for longer than I want to be – I think people have come back from somewhere and I’m concerned about seeming to be in the bathroom so long (or something). Anyway, I go to get dressed and go downstairs. There is a bit of trouble standing up somehow, involving pulling myself up by a railing and getting urine on a towel or something. Then when I pull my pants up and start going downstairs I find that I had a large bag of loose-leaf tea in my pants that has ripped open. The tea leaves are spilling out and making a mess, further delaying me from going downstairs to see the people who have come along. At some point a girl I know is talking about coming back to the other place with us to spend the night. Not sure if this was the same dream or a different dream: At Aunt J’s? There is a device that someone (my grandfather?) is using to siphon water into a jar for me to take with me when I go somewhere. They fill the jar with water, and another jar (at least, another jar comes from somewhere). We put these into a plastic bag along with some other items, and now I have the challenge of carrying the bag without spilling the water. Restroom privacy issues Going to a public restroom. I’m in one stall, but people keep coming into the restroom and for some reason that bothers me so I decide to find a different stall. There is one a couple of stalls down. I walk into this one. It is fairly large. At first I notice a mannequin set up inside the door, which is positioned so that it’s staring at the toilet. I guess that’s OK. But then I notice that there is a security guard sitting next to the toilet, along with a kid (his son, I think). I don’t really want these people watching me while I use the toilet, so I give up. Fragment A chipmunk or a small squirrel in my kitchen.
non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP With Nighthawk, somewhere with other people around. Looks like an office as we are sitting in office chairs with wheels, but also feels like a café as people are just chilling in nearby tables. He is talking about something and I want to get closer to him, so I give an impulse to my chair to slowly roll to his side. But I pull it a bit too strongly and I roll too fast and bump into him. As a result I grab his legs and put my hands too close to his crotch and his reaction is to flinch and push himself back. I say sorry and he asks if I did it on purpose and I honestly can't tell. I feel like it was both accidental and intentional to a certain extent. I am also upset that he reacted that way but I guess it is to do with being in a public place with other people, so I don't insist and we just continue a normal conversation. At my parent's house but the house looks totally different from what it really was. My bedroom is normal but it is attached to some shed that has the roof cracking in the middle and we are all waiting for the moment it falls apart and trying to keep everyone in safety. But when it falls apart, the roof in my bedroom also falls apart and then half of my parent's room also goes down. We are tryig to take it calmly and make plans to cover it all with plastics until we get the reconstruction done, but my father starts calculating the costs and it is despairing. Anyway, we adapt to living like this. But for no good reason I now have to shower in my room, as the shower head is right above my bed. So I wet my bed completely. My mom suggests I wash quickly to reduce the amount of water soaking the bed and I wonder how I am going to sleep on it later as it won't dry until then. Then I remember we have a second bathroom with a shower that wasn't affected and wonder why we ain't using it. Then I become aware that I am dreaming and I teleport involuntarily to a street in a city with very modern architecture mixed with old palaces at an ocean front. I want to see the place but then I notice how long the street is and I don't want to walk it all the way, so I lift off to see it from above. I see this shore line to my left, another to my right and some more in front but far away. I dive in the water just for fun and wonder what to do with my lucidity as I don't have anything prepared. All that occurs to me is to summon Buddha Tara. All I get instead is a red or pink tide on the water, as if something is gathering to form a shape, but it never does. I focus harder on any Buddha to appear and one starts forming and getting out of the water. It is actually a white porcelain figure, looking much more like Budai, not any Buddha. Not very fat but a little chubby and with thin green lines making beautiful designs all over its "skin". It is human sized and I touch it to see if it is a statue or a living being. I am still in the water and he has risen above it, but I manage to touch its arms and legs and I am surprised that it feels like porcelain but also like a peachy skin at the same time and it is warm. It feels so pleasurable to the touch that I continue caressing it, I reach for the neck and chest. The statue then comes to life and scolds me for touching him inappropriately. He gets mad and summons guardians from the water. I start feeling threathened by the figures that start emerging and grabbing me. There is a floating platform nearby and I get up on it. A strong current forms and drags it, but I allow myself to go with the flow. Then I hit the shore and some monks appear requesting me to come along. I ask what is it and they say some Rinpoche requires my presence. I hope it's what I am expecting but deep down I feel that it is not. I follow them anyway and they take me to a house. We pass through a room where some monks or lamas are sitting watching tv and they take me to a bedroom in the back. I feel uncomfortable when all I see is a bed and a lama I don't know in a poorly lit room. But then I see there is a young lady laying down on the bed, I feel like she is his companion. I ask what is it they need me for. And he explains she can't sleep for a week or so and she is going mad and they are desperate. I ask if we can talk and he asks her to come forward and listen to me. At first she looks angry and uncooperative. I don't know what she expects from me, but I start by telling her about a friend I have that also couldn't sleep for a week and it was because of anxiety he wasn't even aware of. And suddenly her face changes and she is interested. I ask if there is anything in her life, past or future, that could be the source of anxiety. Something that happened and she can't let go thinking about it or something that is going to happen and she is consumed in fear or doubts about it. Slowly she admits it may be fhe latter. She is studying something and she is going to do an exam for which she feels totally unprepared and she thought she wasn't worrying at all, but now she sees she just wasn't aware of how the concern was consuming her. I give advice on how to let go and examples of how my friend managed to let go and she seems definitely calmer.
non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP Watching some show like "60 Minutes" about a reporter quest to find some hacker. The reporter shows a map of Australia and the different locations the police thought the hacker was at and how she found him for real. Then I am down there in Australia, in some small town away from everything. The other nearest town is 5 hours away and I realize that most people around here never gets very far away from their location because you need to travel by plane to get anywhere in a decent time frame. I suddenly also realize I am in the middle of nowhere and I remember my babies are at home, so far away and I feel so sad and miss them. I feel like I will be away for some time. I walk through the town, cross a crosswalk and see lots of people going in the same direction, then a bunch of uniformed police coming from the opposite direction. But I go to where the police are coming from and they join the rest of the crowd and head to my left down another street. Where I go is some comercial area. I enter a mall looking for a food court. I find some place that looks like a self-service buffet with lots of people in a line and by chance I encounter Zilla. I check the food on display and it is mostly yummy cakes but I want some main dishes. I ask Zilla if there is something veggie and she immediately grabs some fried tofu that is the last available and some other customers before me also wanted to eat. She gets away with it but everybody thinks bad of her and starts trashing her. So she asks me if I want to join her in going somewhere else. I agree and she takes me outside the mall into a back alley. Points to what seems like a private home, but with one single table with two seats outside the door on the sidewalk. We sit and wait to be attended, but I feel awkward with how bizarre this is. Some lady on a window above us is hanging a bedsheet to dry over our heads and I say "What if she was dusting a carpet?" She hears and replies that she could and she wouldn't care. But Zilla seems totally relaxed about all this. She then sees some family playing with their kids in a terrace on the other side of the road and because she is a mom now, she can't help it but to go talk to them about their kids. I notice the kids amazing eyes but I don't care engaging with them. Meet Tova and come to visit her new house in Portugal. Crazy decoration with water tanks along the walls going from room to room, cascading at some points, with fish and plants in some locations. It looks gorgeous but then in one room the tanks are overflowing and ruining the furniture and the floor. I tell her to reduce the volume of the water to stop it overflowing and she says that's the plan but she isn't so happy about it because they wanted to create an effect like infinity pools if only the water kept still. I sit down at some sofa with other guests and there is a famous football player, some actors and some of these VIPs want to know who I am. We have some fun conversation where I explain I am nobody, and I am feeling totally comfortable among them. I get lost in some backdoors, leading to service corridors and rooms and end up at the entrance of a kitchen. I look through the window on the door and spot an hispanic lady alone in there and some other door on the opposite side also with a window, through which I spot some nasty looking guys. I sneak in quietlly and I ask her if she seen those guys and knows them. She says no and she also finds them fishy. We then sense that something violent is going on out there, so we try to barricade the door. After failed attempts, she suggests we just leave. I get lost from her in the corridors and find some door to the exterior, ending up alone at night in the middle of what seems a parking lot in the back. I then become lucid and feel like levitating up into the clouds which are extremely low in the night sky. Then I feel like trying the taste of the clouds and they feel like cotton candy but without any flavour. So then I think about different flavours like mango, strawberry, caramel and I imagine the cotton candy clouds tasting like those. It works and I have a lot of fun savoring the clouds. Then the clouds start raining sweet syrup all over me and I feel strangely like removing my clothes. I bathe in the sweet nectar and start feeling a bit horny. So I play a bit with myself. Meanwhile I feel like I should stop it and actually do something more useful with my lucidity, but I wake up. With mom, on the street. It's dusk and some really ugly clouds are forming in the distance. I spot a saucer shaped UFO with 3 lights and I warn her about it. Turns out, when it gets closer, it is actually some weird weather drone analyzing the incoming storm. We then spot a tornado and try to find shelter. There is only a gas station which doesn't seem to offer much shelter, but luckily it has an underground level, although with an open top. We go around looking for extra shelter but we just see people laying low and near the walls as there seems to be no better shelter. Yet there is actually a small corner room that has a wall and ceiling and offers more protection. I go inside and there is maybe 3 or 4 other people who are ok with us joining them. But since no one else is coming inside, I suggest we barricade the open door with something for us to be safer. They agree, but then some kids ask to come in and I let them, then Alex appears out of nowhere and I also let him, but then no one else and we block the entrance. Then when the storm hits, the people outside seem to finally start to feel afraid and also want to come inside but now we don't want to let anyone else come in, so they start vandalizing our barricade and a fights starts over them wanting to come in an us trying to keep ourselves safe.
Updated 09-29-2022 at 09:38 PM by 34880
I am floating and/or walking down a shallow and not that wide river (it seems similar to the Truckee downtown). It seems like it is underground or in a really deep crevice. At one point I go down one of the rapids and hear people nearby gasp. I don’t find it nearly that impressive. There is a woman here who also floats down a rapid, face first, with ease and nonchalance. I think she’s been doing this for a while.
I am at ‘Tahoe’. (Really, it is a river about the width and depth of the Truckee downtown, though in a more natural setting). I approach a spot that looks clear and deep and get in fully without hesitation. I’m surprised at how mild the water temperature is; I definitely can’t call it cold and it’s even closer to lukewarm. There’s someone else in here; I bump into him as I surface. Now, I’m a little upstream from where I was and on higher ground, overlooking the river. There may be the thought of jumping in. I also may realize better from here that it’s a river.
I am in, what is in my mind at least, Scotland. I’m looking up at gentle green hills as I float down a narrow, stone ravine. The water seems shallow and slow moving. The sun peeks out from behind a hill and causes a glare which I shade with my hand. The scene seems tranquil and special. There is something about me thinking about what if it was a dream. Now I’m somewhere different but related with a middle aged foreign seeming lady that I’ve just met. I end up asking her where she’s from. She replies with ‘Vina’, which I think is in Scotland. I ask if it’s southern and she says no, that it’s more North than the North Pole. The conversation then easily moves to me staying there with her. I want to, and think I start making travel plans.
I’m with Melissa and taking Stella to a pool. It feels like the pool at our complex but a little different. It seems we’re approaching it the same way as we really would, but there is no fence. Right away I notice two guys (one in the regular at work, Blair) and their black and white border collie in the water. Stella doesn’t react to it. Now I feel alone or just separate from them. In the pool, which looks like a long oval with a skinny section in the middle that also seems to be a hot tub, I swim and submerge myself. Someone? asks if I’m doing it to get away from everyone. I think to myself that she’s not entirely wrong.
I’m walking Stella somewhere outside, a fairly wide dirt path, when I pass an older man with his dog, what looks like a retriever. Stella does well with being able to pass the dog without meeting it. There is a culvert off to the side, maybe 8+ feet long. It’s almost filled completely with running water and Stella decides to get into it. In an instant, she’s completely submerged and I can only feel by the pull of the long leash how far into it she is. I initially remain calm, hoping I’ll be able to remain calm, hoping I’ll be able to hold onto the leash until I can just run and grab her on the other side. This then does not feel possible, so I call for help from Dad who is now here. Stella is somehow still being swept down this stream that only seems a few inches deep. It is rocky as well and feels like it’s underground, as I run to catch up with her. With all of my might, I eventually do. I’m going into a Dead and Company concert with Melissa. The indoor venue seems like something comparable in size to the Reno Events Center. There’s a simple white folding table in the foyer and some hassle with the middle aged white man in getting our tickets. I succeed in getting them and we go in. It’s close to empty, so we hurry toward the front. There’s no GA, only seats. When I ask, Melissa says she doesn’t care where we sit, which kind of irritates me. At first we go up too high, so we try lower. There are now some people here and we have to squeeze by them in their seats. The band is on the stage now, all unfamiliar except for Bob Weir, the rest seeming much younger. I notice the drummer playing but don’t hear any music. Bob is wearing a black cloth face mask which he removes and gives to one of the younger band members to wear. This makes no sense to me but I try to let it go.
I am with Julia and maybe some others. We’re walking along a rocky creek bed. The rocks are dark gray, smooth, and large enough to create a few feet of space between us and the water below. I end up climbing down to the water. Julia reacts as if I shouldn’t be doing this, but I think it’s fine. I continue further, eventually submerging and then surfacing in a large, circular pool. The walls seem to be stone, though possibly with windows around towards the top, like a cross between a natural space and an aquarium. There are several sea animals swimming in here with me. Jon is here also and I think I jump into the water once or twice. I am walking outside when I pass by someone’s yard. The path seems to go right next to the chain link fence. The yard is fairly large and at a slight incline. There’s a large rock right by the fence; I climb up onto it. There are two dogs here and I am impressed as one climbs onto the steep side of the rock. I’m not sure if the dogs are coming over to be protective, but I end up playing with them. A younger middle aged lesbian couple come out of the house through its back door and start to apologize for the dogs, but I don’t mind at all. I throw a ball for the dogs. I also sense the couple is tired and trying to go to bed.
I’m in either a pool or hot tub with Melissa. According to its circular shape and small size, it’s a hot tub - I just can’t tell if the water’s hot or not. There are also no jets running. It seems like this hot tub is in a slight alcove and partially covered by a ceiling. We’re facing the rest of the patio; it’s empty save for one younger, blond woman. A teenaged looking girl comes over and asks if we’ll need towels. She seems behind schedule and like she’s doing the bare minimum. Melissa and I glance at each other and tell her no. She comes back in a moment with a roll of paper towels and sets them on the water. I hesitate and then grab them out. Melissa is now sitting close to me in the water and I’m touching her between her legs, under the bathing suit. She is fine with it until I start to go inside, after which she says ‘please stop.’ I’m outside somewhere with Julia and Jessica. The area looks maybe like an empty parking lot beside a park. The trees are flourishing and casting solid shadows to contrast with the golden sunlight. They’ve set up some games, I think as an event for Grassroots. The only one who shows up is a very genial black man and his son (around 7 years old?). One of these games involves a tiny ‘hoop’. I’ve taken it in my hand and inverted it. It feels more like a paper cup and now I worry about getting it back on right. Another looks like a tank on four wheels that can be towed. It’s filled with what looks like different colored cotton balls. I think the ‘hoop’ goes on top and then the object is to drop a marble/jelly bean? and follow it down. The little boy is now playing with multiple soccer balls.
2022 May 9th Some in-line notes. 7:50 Fragment: (woke up sweating, vivid long dream) Some build-up or something; there are aliens and we are fighting them off as a whole, but only just barely so. It's revealed these aliens are just a scouting party and they are part of a larger conglomerate of alien species. During the dream I see several different scenes just as an observer. Meanwhile, there's chaos as a human leader, a woman with short hair, declares that nobody has rights anymore, and that we are moving into a new era beyond our conventional conception of rights. She sounds or seems delusional in some way. I think I saw her give this announcement on some TV thing, but just as an observer. Then I'm in a town, outside. There's a modern feel to the area and the previous announcement had been broadcast on the radio, though I didn't hear this myself as a character. There's an RPG element to reality but it feels absolutely real in every other way. I survive an attack and fight my way into some place. I am constantly chased by aliens or possibly their machines. Eventually, I use some fast-travel mechanic. Once at my destination, I meet up with a friendly robot. It explains that this worm thing has moved to the edge of reality, it looks like a Combine alien. (In retrospect this whole bit makes me think of the original Dune film) Normally, reality moves independently of what's in it. But being at the edge curves reality and causes this high pitch noise to be heard throughout the entire dream. And now, in it's current state, reality moves with the contents. This means there's a very big danger to existence itself and all this chaos makes it worse to deal with. (This segment made no sense at all after waking, but during the dream everything seemed to make sense; there were implied laws of reality that were taken for granted and the whole thing had a semi-mystical aspect to it) 10:15 Fragment: (most of recall lost for needing to answer door) In one bit, I'm this woman, a diver, and I'm coming out of some water into a house or apartment through the floor. It's night time or the house is dark, some lights are on. I'm sort of on the floor, tummy down. A TV is in front of me. I think to myself, "am I actually myself?" and then, just as I'm about to do a reality check with my hands, this other woman with curly hair comes out of a doorframe, smiles at me and we start talking. We know each other as characters. At this point I think to myself that I like her body. I still try to do the reality check, but because of the conversation and social setting, I end up not focusing enough on my reality check.
I’m at a beach with what seems like some of the family. It is definitely a beach on the ocean coast. It looks like Hawaii or the California coast. The sand is long and also very deep, sloping down to reach the water. The waves come in large but not violently. It is dim out but the scene seems to be lit with some glow, maybe twilight or moonlight. I’m in the water now, with Dad and Stella. Stella swims after something - a toy?, not an animal. She dives down quite a ways after it. I’m apprehensive at first but then relax when I see how well she’s doing.
I am somewhere outside, on a walk. The place looks familiar (from another dream?). I’m coming up a slight hill to a smaller river. I think I usually go to the right but I veer to the left this time. There’s a sense of happiness at doing something new. I also have Stella with me. Some or all of this water is frozen solid and she and I walk on it. *I was with Dad yesterday and we were talking about how the pond here froze over.
2022 May 2nd Note to self, at this point I started recording dreams with year first, month second and day third, because as I was archiving dream notes from my old phone, I realised just how much of a mess day first was causing me and it was something I had not given any thought when I first started recording them in that way. In the future, it will be easier to maintain an organised record by using year first, as I already do for some other things. Some in-line notes. Dream (Fragmented): I'm at my old bedroom. Dad is here visiting or something. For some reason, there are some sex toys out in my room and dad grabs them and piles them on top of an old computer desk I used to have in waking life. (The plastic "veneered" one) Dad doesn't comment much of anything about the sex toys, but I feel embarrassed. He talks to me about something completely unrelated. (recall gap) I'm swimming out of a body of water into a stairwell. I can't see the bottom of the water and as I climb out of the water, I'm soaked and dripping. I don't feel cold or hot. My hair is somewhat long and I see it in front of me and feel water dripping off it. The place looks like a school of some kind. I get up to the first mid-landing of these stairs and then climb some more steps up to a second landing. There are no more stairs after this point, as if they're missing, and so this landing just leads over back into the water again, from a higher point. (The preceding segment was recalled while dreaming the next segment) I'm in a field, walking along with two people. One of them is a local, the other someone I know (from the dream?). This field is strange, as it is made up of "strips" about one yard wide of specific plants, which all just seem rather wild and not at all cultivated, despite the organised strip logic going on. As a result, there's a varied array of colours, ranging from a nearly blue-green to a dry yellow-green or maybe brown. The local man is slim and on the older side. He tells me something about how they have no choice and how this is all they can afford to do. I understand "they" as their people, as if I'm visiting somewhere that I'm foreign to. Then, as we walk off the slightly sloped field area and starting down on a slightly steeper slope, I notice a small lizard, about a foot long counting the tail. Its on the side of a plant or a piece of dry/dead wood. It has a black scaled body interrupted by fluorescent yellow chevron stripes. The tail is flat and spiney, almost beaver-like. Then we're walking into a road and I worry about traffic but it doesn't look like there's any, it looks kind of desolate or calm. It's day time, the sun is low but it's not sunset yet and it's half cloudy but it appears bright. There's a road for each direction and they're about twenty to thirty feet away from the other, one of them being on a lower bit, as this whole area is a sort of downwards-sloping cliff seaside cliff area, to the end of which we're walking towards. As we get closer, even though the lowest point of the cliff is only about one yard up from sea level, I feel afraid I might drop or be pushed into the sea (on accident or otherwise). (It's at this point I recall the previous segment, I think the water must trigger the memory, though I don't think I "live" the memory in the dream at this point) Then, I'm at a house that looks like old home. Some part of recall is missing, weirdly I seem to have slept on the sofa and it's as if I was really asleep in the dream, for a time. I grab something I'd apparently left on the sofa. I see the old man from before and say "morning" to him. I feel a little disoriented and think to myself that I didn't mean to fall asleep and yet I did somehow. Then, I'm at an ALDI with H. We drove in in a sporty car. We pretend we're only friends and H says to a checkout person he has to get a massage coupon thing for his partner. The person at the checkout asks "what would she like?" and meanwhile I'm looking for three two-litre bottles of some soft drink, though I can only find one bottle. This ALDI feels more like a tiny service station shop and I think to myself we should have gone to our usual place. (This segment had something to do with the previous one, but I could not retain recall of what or how) (recall gap) Something about playing a game with a demon, and needing to do this to release an angel or something. The game doesn't make much sense at all and I can't think of how to describe it; in any case I struggle with this game in the dream. This takes place at some big/vast house, or some kind of palace. Notes: - Although I'd normally make this dream only visible to myself and DV contacts and so on, I feel that part of me has done that far too often of late, out of some sense of lack of confidence, an aspect I've been struggling with (again) in waking life. - This entire dream was very peculiar. I feel I could make this remark about so many dreams. In particular however, this dream felt especially switched on in terms of symbolic representation. When recalling the dream, it feels like some part of me was aware of this. Everything about it feels organised and metaphorical in a deeper way than usual, though I think some of it may be inexpressible through words. The dream itself in parts felt like one of those dreams that feels just like life in the sense of "this is how things are, this is my life". This dream would benefit greatly from a fuller exploration on paper that is not constrained to words alone and that can make directed (lines/arrows) associative links between elements. - I suspect that dad was representative of false expectations in some sense, because in the dream my embarrassment and the sex toy context were in fact irrelevant to our conversation about whatever else dad talked about. I am not certain what the significance of that desk specifically might be, but I must have been around 8 or 9 years of age when we had that desk, and the computer used communally with my siblings was on top of it, under one of the bunk beds. -- In a sense, the sex toys are also likely representative of the other side of false expectation; what my mind or feelings give importance to often has nothing to do with how others are perceiving me and if anything, I end up being bound or imprisoned by my own false notions of what others think. -- The other aspect to this is that family (represented by dad) are something that I keep entirely separate from sexual contexts as far as mental constructs go, I feel more so than most other people do, though that may be a result of upbringing; here, the two contexts meet but are essentially ignored by one another, as dad makes no remark and pays no mind, other than some sort of strange "tidying out of the way", and the toys themselves are inert objects that cannot on their own express anything except via context. This makes me think about how Jung defined libido as "psychic energy" as opposed to "sexual energy" as Freud probably did and it seems like the sex toys can also be representative of a transformation of my point of view on said energies. Again, I cannot fully form thoughts on this via text alone, this requires diagrammatic and drawn exploration that can show links and associations in a way that text can't. - The flooded school bit was odd because of how vivid it felt in terms of sensations, regarding swimming and water. I don't remember any specific emotions, but the school was an unknown place that I've never visited and which only vaguely conformed to some constructs of schools, none of which I've ever encountered myself. - I can't help but feel that I associate the encounters with water in this dream as being some kind of metaphor relating to collectives, more so than an unconsciousness. In a sense, the stairs were exactly about this; I can leave a collective but on the way up and out, there's actually no way out, and all I can see again is the collective, despite whatever other aspiration I might have had. There was a (somehow neutral) sense of hopelessness to this in the dream. - The strange field feels like it was about my whole Self. The locals, i.e. my non-conscious elements, do their best to cultivate other non-conscious elements and so on (the plants) but they are constrained by what they can afford to do. I am not sure what "afford to do" could mean in a sense of personality. The land felt inhospitable to cultivation and taming, and perhaps these non-conscious elements actively taking part in growing and tending to things, are actually unwelcome by the rest of the unconscious landscape. I am checking in on them, but I seem to be there in a capacity that cannot act or make changes to the situation at present, and that any changes would have to be future, such as based on a report or the like. -- In a sense, the plants felt very much foreign to the land as I did, even if the locals themselves just seemed... Well, local. - Despite the small size, the lizard felt instantly appealing to look at, to be interested in. The black scaled body felt immediately relatable to what I have wanted to portray in my alter-ego for some time. The chevron striped pattern seemed unique to me. And in some sense I always find myself relating to reptiles though I have seldom spent time near them, perhaps because they have a tendency to run away from humans and to be solitary, which may be part of the appeal in itself. The lizard's tail appeared dangerous but as the lizard was most likely not aggressive, it seemed like an aspect of self-defence only. Curiously, I am now recalling that the lizard seemed to be in shade rather than in sunlight, and it's the only wild animal I recall seeing in the dream. - The part with H at the service station ALDI definitely feels related to how perceptions are so based on physical appearances and how it's very difficult to move on from this, in cultural terms. - The game with the demon felt like some kind of mix between Tetris, cards and other games of chance. I really can't describe it, especially for how little visual recall I have left of it. I just remember a somewhat dark and red-hued room, and a cloth-draped table.
I’m with Melissa somewhere that feels like rural Nevada. The place is gently sunny, with dappled shadows from the handful of trees. I see there is a structure or two - one of which looks like a barn. There are others here, definitely looking like the conservative type. Nobody is wearing a mask, and it feels nice. We notice a small body of water that we’re going to float on? and then notice that it’s bigger than we initially thought, with a couple of turns and an increase in size with each. The water is placid and the scene tranquil and peaceful as we float (on something?).
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