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Shiver me timbers!
This may be becoming a series. Not as good as the first, but still amazing.


I recommend this song for everybody reading.

Yeah, I bet that scared away most people.
Anyway;


I remember being in my math class. Everyone was standing up and doing some combination of square dancing, a sort of Irish tap dance, and Mexican hat dancing. Everybody had just begun to sing the pirate song; I joined in and picked up easily.

Do what you want 'cause a pirate is free, you are a pirate!

Yar - har - fiddle-dee-dee, being a pirate is all right to be!
Do what you want 'cause a pirate is free, you are a pirate!

We got us a map (a map!) to lead us to a hidden box,
Thats all locked up with locks (with locks!) and buried deep away.
We'll dig up the box (the box!), we know it's full of precious booty
Burst open the locks, and then we'll say 'HOORAY!'

WEIGH ANCHOR!

At this point, three, including me, broke off into a short shanty, like a rap to accompany the full song.

I'm I pirate, that I be!
I sail a ship upon the sea, dawg,
I stay up late, 'till half past three!
And that be a peg below my knee!

Everyone came back to the full song. Good, I'm not a fan of rap.

Yah - har - fiddle-dee-dee, being a pirate is all right to be!
Do what you want 'cause a pirate is free, you are a pirate!

Arr - yarr - ahoy and avast, dig in the dirt and you dig in it fast!
Hang the black flag at the end of the mast! You are a pirate!

We're sailing away (set sail!), adventure waits on every shore!
We set sail and explore (ya-har!) and run and jump all day (Yay!)
We float on our boat (our boat!) until its time to drop the anchor,
Then hang up our coats (aye-aye!) until we sail again!

Yar - har - fiddle-dee-dee, being a pirate is alright with me!
Do what you want 'cause a pirate is free, you are a pirate!
Yar har wind at your back lads, wherever you go!
Blue sky above and blue ocean below, you are a pirate!

Everyone sat down and clapped for each other.

I woke up.

That was brilliant.

It was on a cold and misty morning. I can see a few people in my kitchen talking and enjoying their conversations. Though, I had no clue who these people were. I walked in front of them cautiously and then I see something coming from behind one of the girls. It was a person wearing a white mask of a cursed ghost. I remember the fear but I can also remember being lucid. And because of that, I looked at the person under the mask with courage. Now, I walk outside to search for things that could interest me. It was messy in the backyard and I saw a few people hanging around a tree in the back. But for some strange reason, I felt depressed. I then walked over to the right of the house and stood there for a minute. I performed a few actions. First, I tried to see if I had any special combat moves. Second, I jumped up to see if I was able to fly away from my current location. I couldn't. Now, as I proceeded further towards the front of the house to the left, I pinched my nose to see if I was indeed lucid. At this point, I was amazed that I was lucid and didn't escape the dream as soon as I become lucid. But there was one thing I've always wanted to do in my dreams. That is, kiss the girl of my dreams and being able to hold her in my arms. As I have done before, I tried to summon her around a corner by putting my deep faith in believing she would be around the corner. But when I turned to a corner, I would see her, but only for a couple seconds. But those couple of seconds delighted me. She appeared to be vivid and I wanted to try and summon her around a corner again but I always failed.

I remeber 2 vidid, long dreams from last night, and they were both very weird. But this one, doesn't make any sence at all.

The Dog Poo
I was writing a letter. It was for my friend, who has birthday. I was going to a birhtday party later same day. It was a weird card. I went over to some "friends" (I've never met them before, I swear!) to see what hey was going to give her. They was in the woodwork room, and was about to make something to her. I thought "Yeah, that's smart, but mine is even more smart!". I showed them my gift. It was a DOG POO! But I didn't thought about it, and they didn't either. They said "Wow, a dog poo! That's a brilliant idea!" and I thought the same. I thought, that she would be so happy for it! And she did.

1) Low lucidity LD involving staring into this girls eyes (i thought she was a member at DV)

2) I was in my hometown and there was a big religious parade. The leader of the parade was glorifying himself as a messenger of jesus christ in a way i found offensive to life itself. so, i took the piss out of him.
can't remember what i actually said but at one point he cracked and yelled:

"YOU! stop saying funny things and then i will find them amusing"

Me: "but you admit you find them funny"

the crowd laughed and the dream faded.''

3) Me and my flatmate had a scooter race. felt like i was going like 200km. A corner came up and he turned but i lost control and was thrown off. when this happened i left my body and saw myself crashing in front of me.

This dream happened in October 2010.

I realised that I was dreaming but it wasn't lucid.

I was walking with my friend down the street around the park when I saw this girl who went to Saint Angela's Secondary and she was hot.

I tried a move and she rejected me. meh.

Then me and my friend walked around to a bank when 3 guys stole my hat and started throwing it around like it was piggie in the middle.

I got angry and started beating them up. There was a fat kid laughing and my mate that I was with choked him out, he was choking on his blood. LOL that fat kid made me laugh.

The other guys ran away and said they wanted to fight at 1am. So me and my mate got two more guys to make it 4 on 4.

We lined up against the other guys and ran at them I got one in a full mount,one of my other mates threw one through a window, and bin was used by my droogy and the friend I was with the first time went Muay Thai and kneed them into submission.

They ran away. It was awesome I knew I had to got to school so I woke up.

I think I had that dream becuase I wanted to have a street fight it remined me of A Clockwork Orange.

I'm hanging out in Haven with Yuya and Liv, but the dream isn't very vivid and I feel groggy.
We're standing at some table, and I don't really know what's going on. How did I get here again?
I'm not feeling adventurous at all, which is weird.

Yuya notices this and approaches me.
I feel uneasy and nervous as she is standing very close to me.

She gives me a kiss on my cheek.
Suddenly, I feel the urge to breathe, as if I had forgotten to do so for the past few minutes.
As I breathe in, I get a massive shock of vividness and awareness.
Colors become vibrant and burn into my eyes. I start to hear what is going on around me.
It feels like every nerve in my body just turned on, I can feel everything!
As if I was in a coma, and somebody just woke me up.
I knew I was in Haven, I knew I was with Yuya and Liv, but it is only know that I truly realize what this means.
I've experienced this sensation a few times, but it remains as impressive as the first time.

"Holy shit!"
"Indeed."

Yuya laughs.
I look at my hands, I can feel every single tiny hair on my hand and fingers, as the wind gently brushes through them.
I quickly investigate my surroundings because I'm hearing music.
The 3 of us are standing at a table with different drinks on it. There are other tables with other people as well, it appears that we're at some kind of party or celebration.
There's a band playing many different string instruments, so that's where the music is coming from.
I really like the music, it's mostly cinematic music, very dramatic, but also full of energy and very pleasant.

Yuya hands both Liv and me drinks, they look like shots.
Liv doesn't seem to trust her drink, she's investigating it carefully.
Yuya and I pour ours down. It burns a bit in my throat, the drinks are very strong.
But they're very good. Liv finally drinks a shot as well and seems quite surprised.

"What wonderful liquid is this?"

Yuya and I have to laugh, and we continue having a good time and having drinks. Liv is such an innocent girl.
I clearly feel that I'm getting drunk, and I do so faster than I should.
After just 3 shots I can already clearly feel the effect, but the dream remains extremely vivid.

"Yuya... how come dreams feel more real than waking life?"

She smiles.

"In waking life, it feels like I'm on autopilot the whole time. I do not see the beauty of my everyday life, everything seems boring and normal even though it really isn't."
"Why does it feel like I'm asleep in waking life and awake in my dreams... awake right now?"

After some thinking Yuya replies.

"In waking life, you are busy thinking about a million things at the same time."
"You might not realize most of what's going on, but you subconscious continuously tries to solve all the problems of your life."
"There is simply not enough room to think about your surroundings the way you do right now."

As always, Yuya's explanation makes a lot of sense, but I still feel like I'm missing something.

"Well... I simplified it quite a bit... it is quite complex, I don't know how to put it in words..."

She puts her drink down and puts her hands around my neck. She then presses her forehead against mine an closes her eyes.
Our thoughts merge for a second and I catch a glimpse of the proper explanation.
But I can't understand it, it feels like it goes beyond the limits of my imagination.
I do understand the conclusion though, and I feel like it makes more sense now.

As Yuya opens her eyes I get lost in their beauty.
I'll never get used to such beauty, to such infinite detail.
Usually, I'd start feeling insecure and look away, because I know I'm streaming my thoughts towards Yuya, and she'll immediately realize that I'm thinking about how beautiful she is.
But I'm drunk, and I keep looking for a bit as she smiles...

"I feel funny!"

Both of us look back at Liv, she seems to have had quite a few shots while we were distracted.

"Liv, are you drunk?"
"Huh? I don't know."
"Have you never had any alcohol?"
"Uuuuuh, I don't think so?"

You can tell by the way she moves that she's really drunk.
I have trouble avoiding to laugh out loud, but I got a funny idea.

"Liv, tell us a funny story!"

Yuya is about to crack up.

"I'm way too insecure to tell you anything shameful!!!"

But she continues anyways.

"So... you know how I seduce people in their dreams to leech some of their energy?"
"Well... see, when a succubus seduces someone, she awakens the natural sexual urges within that person, but blocks out the thought of having sex..."
"This way you get lost in a state where you're extremely aroused, but you won't do anything..."
"But err... apparently not everyone is... interested in the same things?"
"There was this guy, about a year ago... he casually started to get his dick out... I thought I had forgotten to block his sex thoughts at first... but I didn't!"
"He proceeded to try to FUCKING PEE ON ME. I mean, can you believe this shit?"
"What is wrong with people???"

This is too much.
Yuya and I burst out laughing. We both have to hold on to the table to avoid falling to the ground.
Liv, the shy succubus, that fact alone is funny enough as it is, but hearing her tell this story because she's drunk, it's just too funny.
All three of us can't stop laughing... I can feel the dream fade away, but I can't stop.

non dream - lucid - non lucid

Usually I don't post these short non-lucid ones on DV, but this one was so hilarious.

I'm at an outdoor party, during the middle of a sunny day.
There's a few people I know (not in waking life), and we're having beers.
Some girl points at my belly and asks me if I'm pregnant.
I look down at my belly and it's indeed swollen, as if I was pregnant.

"Holy shit? How did that happen?"

A friend approaches.

"Dude, you've just been drinking too much beer, that's all."
"What? The beer got me pregnant?"
"Bro, didn't you know? You get a big belly from drinking too much beer."

Oh yeah, that's true, you get a potbelly from drinking too much beer.

"Let me help you out."

He takes a big beer glass and holds it in front of my bellybutton.
He then presses against my belly with his index finger and beer pours out form my bellybutton into his glass.
Everyone approaches me and looks intrigued at what is happening.

Some dude walks past:

"Sweeeet, belly beer!"

And gets in line to pour one next.

I mean, seriously, what the fuck?
When I woke up I had to laugh uncontrollably for a few seconds.

So I was out to dinner with my family and my aunts and uncles and stuff. Everything was going fine until my uncle saw a ninja outside of the restaurant flipping over chairs and couches and stuff. My uncle FREAKED out, screamed out the window "HEY! Get in here so I can kick your ass!" The ninja came in. They fought and the ninja knocked him out in 2 hits. Yup.

Something has affected the masses of society, so I escape to the mountains with my friend Dustin. We "hideout" in a classic log cabin, complete with a thigh-high wooden fence surrounding it. I wouldn’t be surprised if Lincoln built it, but he probably didn’t.

Dustin and I are hiding up and away from the rest of civilization because something vague, yet dangerous has befallen mankind. We’re not sure of what it is, or how we’re aware of it, but once we find our supposed ‘solitude’ in the mountains things start to unravel. I should note that this Dustin wasn’t anything like the Dustin I know, except for the fact he looked just like him. This Dustin is immediately hostile toward me, and advances upon me outside of the cabin, and he ends up instigating a dream battle between us.

We grapple at first. To the casual observer it looks as we’re yanking each other around or shoving one another, almost as if we were “Indian Wrestling.” It is interesting to note that it was mostly Dustin attacking me. My end of the “physical” battle consisted only of defensive blocks. My offensive combat are more clever and creative (mind-oriented) whereas Dustin resorts to grunt physical movements (body-oriented). I spend most of the dream battle antagonizing Dustin verbally. My assault consists solely of insults, sarcasm, jokes, and a lot of laughter… everything I say makes Dustin angrier and causes him to retaliate stronger. I counter his punches and kicks expertly, which makes him angrier. I even allow him to land a few of his blows, all the while laughing and instigating.

I am winning the battle even though I haven’t landed a single physical blow. I believe this is because my verbal assault distracts his attention and focus, which gives ME more power. Dustin grows weaker as he spends more energy on physical attacks. I back him up against the short fence and all while talking to him, I execute my first physical assault, which is to pushhim over the short fence. He topples backward over it awkwardly, but not painfully, it was more embarrassing than anything. I have won the battle because Dustin has been made to look like a fool.

We both know that I have won, we seem to both understand the unspoken rules of the battle. I laugh in victory, which pours salt into Dustin's wound as he, upset on the other side of the fence and covered in actual dust, makes a quick movement and draws a firearm from his side. He fires the pistol at me once, as I feel a bullet tear through me. My laughter stops. I am not hurt. I'm not exactly shocked or surprised that I am shot, as I seemed to anticipate it earlier, but I am more disgusted/disappointed at the "cheap shot" (lol get it) after the end of the battle.

I touch my stomach where I am shot, and look down at my bloody hands. I shake my head at Dustin, and fall to my knees muttering snidely something about his inability for honor. I laugh again. I am mortally wounded, though I do not die before I wake up.

A man plays an Old West guitar… or “gee-tar.” He plays alongside a small band in a typical run-of-the-mill saloon. Like everyone else in the building, they chew and wear chaps and cowboy hats. Dust covers everything. I am an outsider, (from the town, and literally outside of the saloon) riding my horse through this future ghost town. My horse suddenly collapses and I spill into the middle of the road. My horse is dead. I look around the road and town’s buildings and see countless other horses have died.

I look at my horse and watch it go through the entire decaying process in a matter of seconds. My horse is now just a skeleton. All of the other dead horses are also skeletons. I look on at all the dead horses, still in shock, holding the reigns of my skeleton horse… and tie it up to a post. I enter the saloon, the band still plays and I order me a drink to clear my head. A large cowpie jerk of a man starts shit with me and antagonizes me because I ain't from around here. Chaos ensues.

A large, full-scale old-fashioned wild west bar fight breaks out of epic proportions. All of the classic Western moves are there: man falling off balcony, the Madame’s girls screaming, some guys too drunk to fight; and on top of that adding a healthy dose of classic dream power: telekinesis. All the while the band never stops playing. Finally, at the climax of the fight, the song ends and I am left the last man standing. Exhausted, I am clobbered over the head by the singer/songwriter by his gee-tar, and he is deemed REAL last man standing.

I had a dream that nobody wanted to listen to me tell them about a dream I had.

Teacher's Pest



I sat in one my professor's class, a class that is based on poetry. Everything was the same, as usual, except that all the desks were a lot smaller than university tables, and were tiny, elementary school desks. I was my normal, large, adult size, complete with facial hair and a smile.

My teacher, on the other hand was very upset, and increasingly annoyed by my "antics" which were nothing more than making a joke here and there, and getting the class off topic.

Wiener Stretching



I was standing in my room, naked, when I became lucid. I put my hands on my hips and looked about the room, triumphantly. Everything seemed to have an extra shimmer, another layer. I looked down and decided to stretch my penis. I grabbed it with my hands and tugged on it until it was so long, that it touched the ground and landed in a heap.

I laughed hysterically and nearly walked into the other room when I heard a noise, and decided it was best to stay in my room.

There's a little bit of a gap here, but I started doing various 'reality tests' like plugging my nose. Then later a dream character in the form of "some kid" kept following me around and asking me for marijuana.

The dreamworld faded and as it did so, I spun around and brought it back.

Ever since I started this DJ, I've been remembering a lot more dreams, which is great! Back to the good old days - I'll soon be lucid dreaming like before.

I was in a small shop in town, with a staircase that lead upstairs. Naturally, I went up the stairs.
It was a large café of sorts. There was a long counter, which displayed delicious treats.

I met with my sister at a table. She had ordered me some food - I think it was pizza.
But here's the thing - all the food served here was made of sweets (or candy as americans call it)! Yep, everything was sugary. I'm not sure if it started out exactly like this, maybe the food was normal at first. But that's how it ended up, as the dream progressed.

Remember these?

Yeah, it was like that, except on a much bigger scale.

I remember being very hungry, and the dream lasted quite a long time.
I talked with my sis', and she bought me food. I don't remember the specifics, only being hungry and having an interesting time.

Often my food dreams are like this - I'm hungry but never seem to get satisfied, probably because of real-life hunger.

In the end, I walked up to the counter. There was a picture of a delicious burger - I was so hungry, and it looked very tasty.
But for some reason, I didn't realise it would be made of confectionery.
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I remember looking at the picture, thinking it looked fantastic. On show was also pizza, pasta, and more.

But it was all sugary and sweet.

This was a very odd dream I think. Not as naturally bizarre as some others, but the fact it was in a sort of normal setting, yet with the odd feature of having sugary food. Haha.

As expected, my re-establishment of a RC habit has not fully set in yet...officially my goal is just to have a single RC-induced lucid dream by this Saturday, which will be one full week of nights since my return to lucid dreaming, although I am quite open to the idea of having more LDs prior to that date

Well, anyway, for the sake of improving recall and looking for more dream signs, here's what I remember from last night (it would seem I'm getting pretty consistent with remembering 3 dreams, eh?)

Dream 1 - False memory and what I saw around me both said the same thing: I had done an absolutely awful job cleaning up at work the night before. The place was a mess...particularly the bathroom. All of the toilets had to be taped off due to...misuse, shall I say...or overuse...hmm. But anyway I was just waiting to really hear it from my boss, when he stepped inside and said, "You know what, great job on the cleanup last night. I never thought I'd say this, but I have absolutely no complaints; I can't think of anything that needs done better next time."

I thought he was joking at first, but it became evident within moments that he was serious. "Sweet! I got off the hook!" I thought before the dream faded

Dream 2 - I was at the computer, trying to type something, and I noticed my keyboard wasn't working. (this occasionally happens IRL...I have a keyboard that isn't fully Windows 7 compatible, so I sometimes have to unplug it and plug it back in to make it work) I was about to re-plug the keyboard, when I thought about my old one. It was just as basic as you could get, but it worked. But I really needed the newer one for video editing, so I wasn't sure what to do. Then this little mental argument grew to a huge scale in my head to where I was losing focus in the dream and the keyboard in front of me flashed between the new and the old...the dream grew more unstable...then it ended.

Dream 3 - It was Christmas now, and someone got me an XBox 360 and a racing game to go along with it. At first it seemed really cool; the menus had great graphics and I was able to totally customize my car and all sorts of things. But then I actually got into the game and the FPS was really bad, not to mention the controller basically had no bearing on what happened in the game. Pushing buttons did things, but not always the same thing every time, and never what I wanted them to. Eventually I got frustrated and stopped, then took the XBox upstairs, opened it up, added some hardware (which conveniently appeared in my hand on the spot) and then tried it again. This time the controls were responsive, and the framerate was better, even though it still was a bit jerky.

I woke up wanting a PS3.

Not kidding. I know it was just a dream, but something in me really dislikes XBox now. Weird how that works...