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comment dream lucid

After a week with my new Fitbit, I evaluated my sleep patterns (which is how it should be used rather than obsessing about specific data… a note to myself) and completely changed my strategy for the night.
Simply, instead of focusing on the 6th-8th hour of sleep, I decided to focus on the 1st REM period and then on the 4th-6th hour - parts of my sleep that aren’t completely messed up yet.
So, the idea was an auto-shutoff alarm (vibrations only, 1 second… this wakes me up most of the time but doesn’t wake my husband) for the 1st REM period (fail, I wasn’t dreaming, light sleep only) and the second alarm for WBTB after 4 hours of sleep.

I had problems staying awake… only did a quick MILD.
Then a lot of really good dreaming. On and off, with a couple of very short awakenings.
Awakening again, from a NLD. Time for a LD. I use the “I am dreaming” mantra but only manage to say it twice...

I am standing on a cliff, on the edge of some deep cwm (amphitheater-like glacial valley). It could be Snowdonia, but it looks a bit wilder, maybe the Scottish Highlands. Some of the slopes are grass and gravel, some steep rocks. I remember my plan to fly. This is a great place to fly. And it's a dream, right, so I can fly, right? I look around again and the sub-optimal vividness makes it obvious.
It's that weird part of the day that only exists in some lucid dreams - too dark to be day, too light to be night, but it's also nothing in between... more like both night and day combined.
I jump off the cliff and want to fly. But I'm wearing a nightgown that completely blocks my movement like a straitjacket, so I can't spread my arms and I am losing altitude. In-flight, I take off my nightgown and throw it away. I'm naked now, but who cares here. I've lost too much height and I land softly on the ground. I notice I still have some stupid slippers on and I take them off too and throw them away.
Ahead of me is a rockface and some large boulders, I see a cave at its base. I feel drawn to it. But I tell myself no, the plan is to fly, I can come back here later.
I jump up twice. During the third jump, I remember my mini-goal - to look at the night sky, so I do a backflip and look up. There are little swirls everywhere. I focus more, wanting to see some space objects, and I see little planets with rings. Cool. I'm slowly floating on my back, looking at it in awe.
I get down on the ground again, really tempted by the cave, but I'm not sure if it's still there. I remember the permanence schema - it's always been there, and surely, it's still there.
I turn around and the cave is where expected, I walk towards it. There's a person I “recognize” as my companion inside. He has my discarded clothes and some camping gear. I can't fit in there with him inside, so I leave it to him. I want to try flying again.
But as soon as I turn and walk away from him, the dream fades.

After awakening, I regret not taking time to stabilize or to try to increase vividity. I was a bit like a kid in a candy shop there.
Technique-wise, I am not sure, what it was. DEILD? I wasn't completely lucid from the first second, but I still had the self-awareness carried on from the micro-awakening.
I know that the awakening happened in the middle of the REM period, so perfect timing.
There is also a possibility of the awakening being a FA.

comment lucid

Not the best night. Falling asleep way too quickly when attempting SSILD and later the opposite problem - drifting in and out of dreamless light sleep.
At my usual waking time, I still felt tired and tried to sleep longer, but again only light sleep. I cuddled with my husband for a couple of minutes but it was too hot. We talked a bit.
Then I decided to get up, but taking it slowly, I closed my eyes again.
An unexpected wave of vibrations went through my body. I thought “why not” and rode with it.

Around me is a semi-tunnel in a rock - a road or path cut into the side of the mountain - and there are large window-like cut-outs with views into the valley. I can see a beautiful landscape - steep hills and rocks, half-hidden in moving clouds. I want to take a photo, but I don't have my camera, so I tell J. to take one. He comes, but now the clouds cover the most beautiful parts I've seen, the most rugged mountains. I tell him he has to wait.
I look around and think what a nice setting for a lucid dream this would be. (1) I try to visualize myself climbing down. Logically, there should be a steep cliff, but I imagine a steep slope. The dream doesn't cooperate much, the result isn't very realistic, I see several cut scenes - a slope with scree, grass, a steep descent - and suddenly I'm down and it seems to have worked, I'm on the grass and there's a sparse forest all around. The situation stabilizes and looks more solid. I examine my surroundings with my senses, half expecting to be still connected to reality, but I am squatting on the grass and feeling only the damp cold grass with my fingers, I know I'm fully in the dreamworld and that's satisfying. (2)
I'm going through the forest. Suddenly there's a glass building, like a teahouse with seating inside. I walk through the inside and at the end, I have to squeeze past the only opaque wall in such a way that I lose my view of the outside. Knowing how changeable dreams are, I'm a little worried that the forest will disappear, but when I come out, everything is still there, and when I reach for the glass door, I can feel the water droplets trapped in the door frame on my fingers. It impresses me as a very nice detail.
There are some trees behind the teahouse, blocking the view further on, and when I go out beyond them, there is a car (relatively old, red?) and a little boy, about 5-8 years old, and another one next to him. One has light brown hair, the other is almost black-haired, and both have round faces. I greet them and ask how they are. They answer something normal. Then I see their mother watching them. I ask her something too, but I don't know what, the answer is sensible but uninteresting. (3) I turn away from them and wonder what to do next. I remember that I have some things I want to do in my dreams, like get somewhere else. And I wake up all of a sudden, like I suddenly remember that I have to get up, or that I have to be somewhere else.

Notes:
1) At this point, I didn’t believe it was a fully formed dream, I just couldn’t believe that the dream would form so quickly.
2) In retrospect, I think this transitional “daydreaming” wasn’t necessary and I could just touch the rocks to stabilize the dream when still on the road.
3) After waking up, I was really surprised by how bad my memory of the dream was. I have a theory there is a connection between my long-term memory being off in the dream (not remembering my goals) and the dream not being stored in the long-term memory.

comment non-lucid lucid

12th April was the international lucid dreaming day. There was an idea to celebrate this by lucid dreaming about being at a party with other DV members. I normally don’t do tasks and challenges (too early for me) but I decided to try this time.
1st attempt - night from 11th to 12th April - VILD - failed. This is the day after (2nd attempt).

Awakening 11:02, I decide to simply set the intention for “I see something = dream”

3 irrelevant non-lucid dreams (shortened)
Investing lecture - I am attending a lecture or a conference talk about investing.
School and singing - I am in school and a classmate is singing beautifully.
Hanging G - A friend (G) hangs himself but is still alive. I am not sure if I should help him or not.

On the way to the party
I am standing on a footpath or a local lane. I realize I see something and that means I am dreaming. I remember my plan to find a door, go to Prague and go to a pub there to attend the DV party (I decided to put it in Prague - I haven’t been there for a long time and it would be a good place for a party).
But there are no significant buildings around! There is one old cottage without doors and a rusty metal shed or a garage. I am thinking what to do if the door is locked and I decide it shouldn’t matter for teleporting. As I approach the shed, I see the door is very rusty and very small and I decide not to use it and find something better.
I follow the path, it gets grassy but there are no houses now. I can see a forest in the distance.
I walk very quickly, the scenery around me changes unrealistically quickly but I feel like walking normally. No houses and no DCs. It gets slightly blurry and I check my pockets and find some paper tissues there but I realize it is my black jacket and I am actually wearing it IRL, which means it isn’t a part of the dream and I can’t use it to stabilize. I touch the ground instead, I can feel the gravel of the path and it helps immediately. The dream is very vivid now.
I continue and there is a tree. I remember reading about someone who created a wolf in a LD, thinking “there is a wolf behind the tree”. I try to think it but as I come closer, I realize that the tree is too small to hide a wolf. There is a small boy and a weasel and the weasel is defensively aggressive, hissing at the boy.
The path becomes a gravel road and I suddenly notice I walk barefoot and can feel every step. It is almost painful.
Then it is a footpath again, grassy and comfortable to walk on. Bog grass (common rush) grows next to the path and I touch it with my hands, it feels very realistic and I take a stem with the brown flower with me, to use it for stabilizing later, if needed.
Then the path follows an edge of a hill with steeps cliffs. I can see glimpses of a city down in the valley. I go closer to the edge and the view opens in front of me. The city is very beautiful with some small houses, medium houses and tall skyscrapers reflecting light. It feels a little bit like Prague but it isn’t Prague, it’s too modern for that.
There is a concrete slab right at the edge above the cliffs, it’s almost like a springboard or a platform for jumping down. The view is even better from there.
I decide to stop trying to find doors and fly instead. There are some trees but the slab looks perfect for jumping from it and flying towards the city.
I want to run get speed for the jump, so I walk a couple of meters from the edge and I make sure it is a dream. I start to run but I remember that I still have the jacket (unzipped) and that would be bad for flying, so I stop and zip it up. I put something in my pocket, in case I need to stabilize the dream while flying.
Suddenly, there is R, telling me something. I don’t listen and try to run again but I am too far from the edge and don’t see the platform well, so I go closer. R looks very confused, so I tell him that this is a dream and I am going to jump. He seems to understand.
I take a deep breath to run.

And I suddenly wake up without warning, no fading, no blurriness, no feeling of resurfacing. I think I snored IRL or tried to clear my nose and it jolted me awake. DEILD failed.
Time 12:04

“This is a dream”
I am on a street with R and some friend. I realize that I see something and that it is a dream. There are many houses and many doors around! And I am lucid for the second time this night, yay! I feel very confident, time to go to Prague.
I tell my companions to go ahead, I will catch up with them later. They stay, look at me and don’t understand. I say to myself fuck this shit and confidently tell them “this is a dream” (as you don’t exist, stop bothering me) hoping to get rid of them.
The dream suddenly fades to black. I touch the ground and can feel some stones but everything is still black and fading. I am confused because this always works. It feels like the dream is laughing at me.
I wake up but I don’t open my eyes. I lost my lucidity here but I think it was a false awakening, not a real one. I don’t know how long it was to the next dream, I think there was a period of NREM sleep.

Mouse FA (not sure if this dream was before the LD or after, probably after)
I am in a bed in some flat, there is a narrow kitchen and balcony. There is some kind of mouse that gets under my blanket and cuddles with me as my cat does. It’s my pet and I am surprised it was free to round around the flat when I was sleeping, it could have hurt itself in the kitchen or fallen from the balcony.

Cathedral FA
I wake up in a bed in some hotel room. I remember the LD and trying to DEILD. I think I even tried to DEILD in this dream to get back to the LD.
There are friends and one of them, T, tells me that they are going to have coffee if I want to go with them. I talk with R and I need to brush my teeth, so I tell T that I need 5 minutes and he says that 5 minutes is ok.
We have the coffee one floor down from our room. It is much nicer room.
We go back to our room and it looks different now, the bed is bigger. I think I like it more than the room under us. T says it is the high ceiling, making it more airy.
Then I enter a corridor, leading from our room. I see some stained glass windows and as I continue, I can see I am in a beautiful cathedral. There are stairs leading down to the floor of the cathedral (I am standing at the top of the stairs), the stained glass windows are a mix of very modern and traditional images and it’s huge with huge cupola above my head. There is a small chapel in the middle with a column raising from its roof, supporting the roof/dome. The column is thick, possibly having stairs inside.
I realize our hotel is a part of some historic building. Someone calls me from our room, telling me that I am in the paid section. I say that I am just looking. We have to find time, buy tickets and visit the cathedral later.
Someone says that the map is lost and if I know something about it. I say that I don’t because in my lucid dreams, all things are created by the dream, so I wouldn’t need to take the map with me to my recent LD.
Then I go back to our room, having some trouble to climb the stairs, someone offers me a hand.

I woke up soon after this dream.

4th August 2020 ~11:30

Dream:

Near the end of a stupidly long non-lucid part; I was falling through a pipe, I was with a squad to take something out in a facility. But then as I was falling, everything seemed still.

I was in a void of sorts and time seemed to pass slower, the others were still here with me. It felt like being in water, and there was a similar visual effect. The squad leader, turned to me and said "you must pick the right one this time!" and I suddenly saw a vision of who to pick.

Then I was in a room. There were three guardians and some other characters. I picked the one from my vision. It was true that it was the start of a cycle that I was now breaking, at the start of this long non-lucid part I was in a very similar situation.

But this time I had picked "correctly". As a result, my consciousness shifted, I was now the guardian I'd picked. I noticed my hands, I had three fingers and one thumb. I became lucid but it came slowly, not like in the past.

There was no "aha!" moment or sudden shift. I realised I was in a version of my mom's first office room. The characters were gone, I think; and to confirm my lucidity further I grabbed a metal shelving unit in the room and threw it through a wall, fully expecting it to go through as if it were a ghost, and it did!

I wasn't sure what I wanted to do, since I hadn't fully expect to be lucid. I decided to indulge in one of my fantasies and decided to become a giant anthropomorphic lizard. It sort of worked... I saw myself in third person, wearing a labcoat (my artificial dream sign) as an anthro lizard. But I wanted to be myself in first person, I get tired of seeing things in third person in dreams and so I willed it and then was myself as the lizard. I looked down and saw the city-sprawl below me. I had reptilian-like feet with claws and I could see I had an emerald green skin but it was not as dark as I wanted. I tried to give myself different sexual features but it didn't work either.

I was happy enough the transformation worked in the basic sense in any case and started to have some fun by putting myself against the ground and sort of rubbing along it for lack of better words. I paused and checked my hands again, just having a good look at them. They were hardly as scaly as I'd expected and this felt disappointing but I carried on. I remember noticing the atmosphere effect but oddly enough when I was standing I didn't notice the curvature effect of the planet. I was big enough that I should have been able to notice it.

While the terrain did get sort of crunched/destroyed/etc by whatever I did, I wasn't able to see the cities in any great amount of detail and could not notice any mountains either. I was too big I suppose. I could feel my tail at several points but overall the feel of my body was mostly whole/complete.

Spoiler for Self-indulged arousal:

Still, I let myself get aroused by my fantasy and didn't try to change this fact and eventually just started pleasuring myself. Somehow it didn't take much to get to orgasm and it was very oddly and easily controlled, even though its effect was not quite what I'd expect. The physical sensations were mostly accurate and I enjoyed controlling them.

After this self-indulging, I realised the city/landscape I'd been having fun on and with was really just a square section in a rather large room. At the edges, the atmosphere effect sort of cut off, it was interesting.

I was standing up and looked around the room for the first time; lots of metal pipes and dark metal things, like grates and slits where some natural light came through from. It had an extremely industrial look. As I looked around I still felt that I was very big, but the room's scale made me feel smaller in a sense, despite how much room I took.

My lucidity was fading a little and I'd become a bit bored, I didn't expect to end my fantasy so soon but this was obviously the result of not pre-planning any of this. I saw a character less than half my size, by a sewer-tunnel looking bit. I approached, I asked him "Who are you?", quite curious about this metal-flesh sort of monster, the look only describable as being drawn from many such archetypes.

He gave me a reply veiled in mystery, that I cannot recall anymore, but he did not answer my question in its most basic form and I didn't think of asking again. I got bored of him and decided he was quoting from something, but I forget what he was saying, unfortunately.

I looked around again. This felt so different from my previous lucid experiences. I was calm, and it didn't take much effort to be calm; the dream was far less vivid and detailed than other lucids and indeed even less than some non-lucids, but I appreciated this moment. I enjoyed not feeling my daily pain.

Then, out of nowhere, I heard a deep echoing voice. It told me "You must kill your brother, remember?". Some less conscious part of me, replied automatically "I know, I know! But not now." Before I could add anything of my own will, the voice spoke again to the effect of "Very well, he shall be kept alive for now." The voice faded completely and I simply finished by again automatically saying "Good."

I didn't appreciate this family-related intrusion into my lucidity but realised it was from a deeper part and so didn't really wish to alter it.

My lucidity may have been fading again but I decided to simply explore these strange halls, carelessly stepping over that square world I'd been playing with earlier and heading for a doorway on the opposite corner from where I was. There were many artificial warm light accents around the metal halls. I eventually found myself on a gantry bit and there were random people both there and on a lower tier. I played around with some telekinesis on some red and blue barrels, trying to lob them but doing so poorly at first. I started to gain a more intuitive understanding as I did it but it did not feel as "mentally driven" as I'd expected, having to move my hands a fair bit.

My form had been consistent through my lucidity, I still had reptilian traits and my hands were clawed now, I recall. A random human character next to me looked up to me and said "Don't throw them with your arms like a real barrel." Or something like that. I understood from this to use hand motions more. I tried lifting a barrel and pulling it toward me, having done so too much and then pushing it forward a little more with some related hand motions.

I tried to hit a person in the lower tier with the barrel but it didn't quite work or something. Then I went down some stairs. I was in a mall area and my lucidity was fading but not gone. A dream character was upset with me, he was some manager for the mall. "You're ruining everything with your lucidity!" He said, or something.

He was extremely upset that I was doing whatever I pleased. There was a woman nearby I'd somehow gotten fired or something (but she was all the more happy about it) and the man became angry and he wanted to have a serious go at me now. But I somehow just turned it against him, kind of willing some help from the woman and she automatically started defending me, distracting the manager man. I was no longer lucid at this point and had been letting myself go along with the dream too much. Eventually I just woke up.

---

Edit:

Spoiler for Notes (in spoiler due to their length):

- Because I wasn't expecting to have a lucid dream so spontaneously, the whole journey through lucidity felt a little bit premature even as I was dreaming; part of my reason for continuing to do checks even while lucid was because I was having trouble believing I was indeed lucid but with such a different (lower) vividness compared to previous experiences. Ideally I need to create some scripts for "episodes" of what I'd like to do in future lucid dreams.

- The most prominent sub-conscious threshold crossing was definitely the part with the echoing voice. I felt myself speak in reply in a way I've never really felt myself speak before, where the feeling of what I was saying wasn't "mine" in the sense of my lucid awareness. The voice referred to the death of one of my older siblings (T); this has a context as far as I can tell, as I used to have dreams both about T dying and about me murdering him, when I was much younger, in my early teens I think. I have of course thought about those old dreams many times, but they had not recently been consciously present in my mind, so this experience was really quite interesting, but I am not too interested in putting any special meaning into it for the time being; I would rather let it manifest itself (the voice or context) again in the future and simply see where it wants to go.

- In the dream I did not appreciate this intrusion mostly because I prefer to keep family-related thoughts separate from personal indulgences and so on, in good part because of personal experience in waking life of finding it annoying. On the other hand, I did not wish to dismiss anything forcibly since I know that can be counter-productive and in all likelihood may just work against my lucidity. In the future I will remain more open to such intrusions and try to explore them to know if there is something "resolvable" within their contexts.

- The fact that my dream self after the transformation was wearing a labcoat was interesting, because I had not lucidly suggested this and when I took over into first person of my dream self once again, I was no longer wearing it. I take this mostly as a sign that my artificial introduction of it as a dream sign has become somewhat successful.

- I expect that part of the low detail of the (comparatively) smaller landscape and cities was due to both the fact I'd somehow made myself marginally "too big" but also due to the fact that it was a spontaneous decision, not allowing me to really try and imagine the detail as required. I have seen enough birds' eye points of views that my dream mind should be able to simulate the perspective correctly; it was mostly as though the details were blurred and unclear, rather than missing or incorrect.

- This lucid experience was radically different in feel due to the decreased vividness compared to previous ones, but what really felt different was just the sense of calm and serenity of my mind. Although I can't say I was thinking completely clearly, I was also able to appreciate the nuances of being conscious in the dream world in a way I simply haven't had time to do so in the previous experiences; by comparison, they had all felt extremely rushy.

- During the experience I completely forgot my long-standing desire to look for the blue-eyed black lizard, something else I should include in my "scripts".

- While I have been more mindful throughout the day to do RCs more often, I don't believe this was the sole cause but a factor in what promoted lucidity's occurrence. There are several things I need to point out to myself here:
-- This dream effectively came about as a WBTB, because after my first waking at 8:30 or so, I had gotten up, had passing thoughts about WBTB and as I got back in bed reminded myself that I was capable of lucid dreaming, I had done it before.
-- I am again on a combination of medication that helps my sleep be more restful compared to its native state.
-- On top of that, I started taking the B vitamin complex too, which has certainly made changes to my dreaming experience, and to a much greater degree than I'd imagined it ever would, if at all.

I felt like these were separate dreams, but since I didn't wake up I'll record them in a single entry.

I was a monk, or something of sort. We were at war with another monastery. Me and another person infiltrated the rival monastery. There were nobody present, and we snooped around, and we found a cellar which had some broken things in there. As we looked around I doubled over in pain and thought that somebody teleported a tack into my stomach. Yikes.

I don't quite remember how that situation was resolved, or it might have just transitioned, but I found myself going to sleep in the temple.

My dream transitioned to me going on Mapcrunch and messing around on a random street in Germany. I find myself bodily transported there at night. It was cold, but I was undaunted and I explored.

I found a coffee shop and drank coffee with somebody I thought I knew. My parent's orange shorthair exotic cat was with me all along and was following me. He was as shy and skittish as he was in waking life, though, even if he kept within the general vicinity of me. He kept wandering around the coffee shop and I was worried he'd get lost, so I put him inside my backpack. He did not seem to mind this, although he did tense and hiss if I tried to pet him.

My dream transitioned to me playing a round of Duelyst, but instead of playing with my own deck and faction, I got backfilled for someone else. They were in a terrible position, my general was a young man in a lab coat, and my enemy's general was an armored woman (or she might just be Faie) and we both seemed pretty Vanar-themed. THe map is also pretty icy, and there was a blizzard filter. I had only one health left, but my enemy only got one minion that can reach me, and it can deal 2 damage, so I played a card that healed me for two damage. Then I replaced my useless spellcards for any minions to tip the balance. The next turn, some kind of event happened that gave us both 20 health on top. The game went on, I start summoning a bunch of minions and trying not to die. It must've been infuriating for my enemy.

Fell asleep: 11:30 P.M. (with trazodone)
Woke up: 9:02 A.M.

9 hours 18 minutes sleep last night
7 hours 38 minutes restful sleep
1 hours 39 minutes restless sleep
82 % restful sleep

Dream: I was exploring a new house we were staying at, and I started finding secret doors, but they all just seemed to be alternate paths to other parts of the house until I found this one that led to a dark room. I tried turning on my activity watch's backlight but I don't know if it worked. Still, I could see better, as I spotted books on a table to the left. I could see that they were probably all just romance but I had to be certain, so I walked up to them and skimmed through them with my eyes. Yep, romance.

At some point I realized this was just another familiar room, that it didn't maybe lead to someone else's house like I speculated after I heard a TV running. Then I realize that someone is coming over - dad. Not knowing what else to do, I waited until he was to my right and yelled "Boo!". He wasn't surprised, as usual.

I'm exploring a specific section of the house. I'm crouched down on the floor looking in the nooks and crannies of a shelf or something, and there's a bunch of objects stuffed in there. There's a kid to my right and I realize it was probably him that did it. I pulled out a handful of writing utensils. Then I start looking for diapers, but all I find is toys and stuff.

Fragment: Looking through a hidden house full of some kind of historical stuff packed away, a man discovers me, another pile of hidden stuff back outside near a tree.

Wakeups:
1:35 A.M. for 23 minutes
3:45 A.M. for 16 minutes
7:20 A.M. for 41 minutes
9:02 A.M. for 15 minutes

Late entry, but late is better than never.

first dream i was in some sort of tall building out on a balcony, scenery resembled old town from the game dying light. I look across about 100 yards away from the balcony, a small concrete bunker on a cliffside. I tell the group of people i am with i want to go there to meditate to improve my dream abilities and they laugh at me but i go anyway. I go into the bunker down an open hatch on the roof, down a all concrete staircase into a all concrete room with some yard supplies. i forget wy i am there and I grab a wheel barrow and collect some things. i go deeper into the bunker and end up in the finished basement of my old house, but it is dark. It is a room with the staircase in the middle dividing it into two sections of room. one with carpet and one with tile, and "tongue and groove" wood walls. I feel fear for some reason and leave. i go out the basement, back up the concrete stair entrance leaving the wheel barrow at the base of the stairs. i turn for a moment and stare at it, and it suddenly get thrashed, flipping over spilling all its contents, like something from a ghost movie and i very quickly run away from there. i am now all the way down the mountain on the road, with no transition between the two. I am talking to my friend somewhat frantically about the incident.

I wake up, throat dry so i grab the water next to me. forgot to do at least a basic wbtb.

This dream below would have been more complete had i wrote it down this morning.

I am in a classroom. its dark colored, faded wallpaper, really run down. The teacher decides to showcase a video of what i had done earlier in the dream, except instead of watching it the dream changes and I am now living this scene. I am in a very dark house, or asylum, or building, not quite sure but go with the flow. There are a series of long long dark hallways and the power is out. It is storming outside and lighting lights the room every once in a while. I see the silhouette of a ghost in one of the flashes, wait a minute and walk down the hallway to see it. now my family appears with me, but quickly disappears when i look down the next hallway. i assume the ghost did something. I see old t-shirts on the ground and pick them up thinking i may need them. The lightning flashes again, i see the ghost again at the end of the hallway and i start to run straight for it this time, it goes down the next hallway 90 degrees to it. there is another shirt at the intersection and i pick it up, look up to see the ghost flying at me. I have no time to react and it stops me. it is a pale older woman, wearing all gray dull clothing. she has no pupils, the dead eyes completely white. then the dream ends

usually dreams of horror themes never bother, gotta say these two in a row made me a bit skittish in my dreams. they usually help me become lucid, resizing this isnt real, but not this time!

(March 4, 2015)

I drove to a prison in my truck and my little brother was with me. We pulled into a small lot in the back of that was surrounded by woods everywhere except where the prison was. There were other vehicles also parked here. It was about mid afternoon and overcast out, cloudy enough to darken the scene with that gloomy rainy day amount of light. We got out and wanted to go somewhere to eat and decided the fastest way was to go through the prison grounds. We hopped over a part of a fence that had no barbed wire covering it and started walking along the outside walls of the blocks. The prison was made of red brick and the windows were covered from view by white curtains on the inside. The grass was pretty real, and had some dew on it. We walked along the outside of the building till we came to a narrow corridor and walked down it thinking it would lead us there. The ground was now concrete and there were some chain link fences blocking off small areas along the way and there was a few red rustic metal doors along the walls. At the end of this walkway was a T intersection and decided to take the left passage and it ended up leading to the front of the prison. From there we could see a road and a lot of stores and restaurants. Me and my brother went to a McDonalds close to the prison. By now the clouds cleared up and it was a late sunny afternoon. We got food and at first i joined someone else's table but later moved to my own after realizing i was probably invading privacy. Some more people came in and started causing problems and arguing with management about something. Someone brought in diamonds and was trying to sell them. They had small clips on them so they could be clamped to things. I put a few on my ear thinking it wouldn't be noticed and i could bring some home.We finished up and left back through the prison exit we came out of the first time, back into the corridor and saw some of the people who were arguing in the restaurant, except now they were in orange prison clothes being moved around the prison via security guard. It was now night time. Before we made it back to the parking lot out back, a security officer found us and told us we would be in trouble if we didn't leave right now. I was respectful and explained what we were doing and he was not very nice about it but let us leave. When we jumped over the fence he told us to not do anything bad because we were on security camera. He then had a camera in his hands with a big infrared light on top and told us someone has been firing rockets and fireworks. We got back to the parking lot and all the vehicles now were parked facing a different way and had dealership year and model numbers on the windows. Mine was labeled 06-11 and I laughed and said they don't even know the year my truck is. I saw my friend shortly after fire a firework out of what looked like a model spaceship. I followed him back to a van in the parking lot that had a lot of computers and tech in it and he was doing something on the computers. We went back to the truck and the dream ended.

Another short one, i was in a dark conference room, and was took of my jacket for a meeting but was woken up as soon as it started. The room was the room for the first key card in outlast.

I fell back asleep after remembering these dreams so bear with me

my rating 4/5

+First dream is on a foggy day, i am driving in my truck to a camping location. i have friends and family following behind me in another vehicle. we drive through a strange trail of twists, turns and bridges. we see other people camping as we drive by. the grass has some gravel in the tire marks of old tracks so we know where to go. otherwise it is not maintained, the grass is tall. we come over to a bridge, very narrow but the vehicles drop down a few inches once off it because the bridge drops abruptly. we drive off to the campsite. I dont remember much about the actual site itself, i remember walking around observing the landscape. eventually we decide to drive back, and we get as far as the bridge but the vehicles cant drive back over it because of the drop off,so i get out and decide to cross the little water way under the bridge. it is very short but i find out it gets super deep. its also cloudy water. i am handed a heavy pack and it almost sinks to the bottom so i grab it and get out and search for a new way over.

+This dream was kind of creepy. I was with someone, in an old abandoned house in a old style town, like almost colonial times. the house was barren of almost everything, at least in the main areas like the foyer and the hallways, was just dirt and dust everywhere as if wind had blown it around over things. we had to leave because we were going to be found so we went back into this dark room full of candles, a few tables, and a skull, and had to blow out all the candles, making the room pitch black. while i was leaving i walked by a pool of water that must have been from leaking roof or pipes, it was in a little pocket in the dirt. a man and two woman appeared and started talking to me,i walked over till my feet were ankle deep in the water, the man and one of the woman disappeared, and the third woman tried pulling me under water but i broke free from her grip and got out of there. i was then out at some old place that looked like my grandfather's liquor store with a friend. it was the dark of night and the only light was out front. we walked out back where there was a crowd of pale creepy looking people staring at me. i stopped for a moment and i think my friend left. one guy with a shaven head and a jailbird outfit came over and started to attack me, saying something about leaving the house. i had no choice but to fight back. i pulled out my smith and wesson swat folding knife and retaliated. he said "nice try but i can just close this" not knowing the lock was engaged holding it open and i cut his hand, the then tried something that was very painful, like wow couldn't believe how real that felt for a dream, and my stomach hurt like crazy but i told my self keep calm, the military wont need someone who will break under pressure, and i used the knife, (leaving out details here), and killed him. another person tried attacking me but i just threw him far. then the dream ended.

+I got back up and fell back asleep and had another dream. first, i was in an old house know i have been in before. and was trying to explore all its room but i was limited trying to keep my younger brothers away from going so they wouldn't be lost or hurt. so i never got to the room i wanted to. i saw part of it and knew ive seen it before, and don't know why i did not become aware of it. i eventually ended up at a colorful museum and play place type thing where i climbed colorful stairwells into other rooms where i found a box, but i had to climb up ropes to get it, which i did. the feeling of climbing the rope felt pretty real. i eventually got the box but never looked inside.

i have seen this type of building before many time in dreams, the one directly above. or at least, the color scheme is put on a lot of buildings. i also saw an old house i have not seen in a long time in my dreams. both are not real places but memories of places i created in dreams.

August 6, 2014

My rating 4/5

This dream I was mainly underground in a scary series of tunnel that was haunted by something. First, we would drop down into the tunnels going down an old rusty ladder down a square shaft in the ground. The ground had water covering mainly the middle of it, like a little stream formed, with the dirt closer to the walls that was not submerged. We began walking gown the tunnels, seeing strange things and more tunnels that branch off in different ways. I found an old alligator skeleton in a small dent in the walls, i eventually came across a room with a bunch of shirts in it and most of them had a creepy picture of an eye on them. Then i was instantly at the starting point of the tunnel again, walking through the maze of dirt and puddles, seeing strange mud formations, and finally making it back to the room with the shirts, this time they all had a picture of an eye and the all were facing one specific spot.

+ this dream is not all together in my head but it was a pretty cool setting, wish i could remember more. I was at an old castle at night, with a group of 2 people, and we were trying to defend ourselves from these strange birdlike creatures that were all over the castle grounds. Like being trapped in a haunted house except there are tons of evil live creatures trying to kill us. I remember the last part if it, being outside the main building but still within the outer walls of the castle. Fge castle was tall, had lots of gates, and faded yellow bricks with s little bit of green moss or something growing in the cracks of it. We are making our escape to the main gate but before we get there we see the bird/demon creatures. I take out a handmade arrow with a deer bone tip and we advance. The drop down and begin attacking, and i get one of them with the arrow by stabbing with it in my hand.

+this dream i was going to the movies with my brother, and we get in the theater and take a seat, it is very dark in here. I don't remember the movie but after apparently is was done we got up and left

+ i was in a certain school setting I've been in a few times in my dreams before, and was walking around a room full of people trying to find one of my friends. The room had bright colors on the walls such as red,orange, and green, and the carpet was colorful too. My friend walked over to me and took out his guitar which had a weird shaped head on it, and he started playing it. Then i woke for good.

August 2, 2014

Rating: 3/5

More fragments. I remember being at my college during construction and almost getting into a fight with some kid near a main building. I decided to tell him it easnt worth it and eventually we made it past it and became friends. He brought me over to his music shop and we walked down the main hall to the end of the building. This part of the building had cheap white tiles and white walls with old sound equipment everywhere. We were at the back of the store when he opened up a metal plate on the wall that opened a secret door. We were now in a bigger space behind the shop. There was small rooftops of buildings we stood on so there must have been some underground houses. I searched with my flashlight and eventually went up into a finished room with dark wood walls and brown carpet. I looked across into another room where a mickey doll that was propped up suddenly fell over, by a ghost. Though i couldnt see it.

I also renember wading through waist deep water in a flooded city and came upon a spot to put down my phone on a shelf where a bunch of empty beer bottles were. before i could do much i was woken.

July 29, 2014 8:58 AM **Includes notes at the bottom**

Rating: 4/5

3MG melatonin taken before falling asleep at 1:30 AM~ish

+The First dream I can remember starts out walking out of an amusement park somewhere at night, im walking down a sidewalk with my brother and we come across and old building with a archway that leads into a open area surrounded by the building. looking down into the "courtyard" I see a lot of half rusted shipping containers places around various spots on the ground. this place looks like it has not been used in a while. so we decide to walk through the red brick archway to the container yard. the whole building is an old factory style building, its made of almost entirely brick,has a lot of metal staircases, and small window panes put together to make a big window. after entering through the archway, immediately on out left is a old metal staircase. I decide to go up it. I am trying to be quiet as possible but the stairs make a loud creaking sound with every step up. finally after making it up the the top,i can either go across the top of the brick archway to one side, or to the right through a little door into another room, or take the staircase to the right of the metal staircase down onto the first floor of the building. I decide to look through the little doorway to the right. its it short, and has a cheap wooden frame around it. looking through it I see there is no floor in there, just some boards for building support, below i can see a staircase to the basement. i also see a briefcase on a shelf across from where the doorway is i am looking through. at this point, a man and woman join me in trying to get this briefcase. i get close to knocking it down but cant, then the woman trys to and she ends up knocking it down to the stair case below. I can see it from up here and decide to go down to look for it. The man has already decided he will go look for it before i go and try. I click on my bright flashlight and walk down the first flight of stair that were to the right of the outside metal stairs, though a dark hallway with rooms on the left to the staircase that i could see above from the little doorway. the staircase is barely visible, its covered in either dust or sand so much that it looks like a slope, but i barely make out each step. I go near the bottom and realize the briefcase i no longer there and i stop instantly in my tracks. i look straight ahead and see the basement goes off to the right but i feel to afraid to look what it back there. it is completely silent and im standing in the basement entry. i yell out to the two people who are with me to make sure they are alright, but i get no response i slowly head had up the stairs back into the hall way when i get attacked by some people, i go into the nearby room i saw earlier and there is the man fighting as well as me now, fighting a group of people i suppose want the briefcase as well. i use the strobe effect on my flashlight to make it hard to see and bash em on the side of my head with the light and we start knocking the guys out but two more go through the doorway, a different man and woman, the woman attacks me and pins me down but my fried helps knock her off while i proceed to hit here with the light and soon she is out cold, as well as the other guy my friend was fighting. at the end of the right, the woman with us comes down with the briefcase saying something like jeez guys why was this hard to get? and me and my friend just look at each other and laugh while she walks out the doorway.


+this dream is more fragmented, I am in some sort of vacation home out in the woods with my family. from where it starts, I am in a hallway in our house, with bedroom doors on the wall behind me, and windows on the wall in front of me. the floors are faded wooden plank floor and the walls are whit. there is a nice breeze coming in trough the window, and outside the window immediately is a pond. In fact, the house is built slightly over this pond. i have a hot dog on a bun in my hand, and i put it in the water to see if it will catch something, but then something does end up taking it, something small and definitely not a fish. I decide to grab another one and head outside to a walk way beside the pond. it is a nice sunny day out but the sun is getting ready to start setting soon. i can see flower gardens behind white walls, and of course the pond. i walk over to the side of the pond from the walkway and put the food in the water again, this time standing in the water. now i can feel a bunch of little things grabbing my ankles trying to pull me down, and i quickly pull out my knife and cut at whatever is pulling me down and get back on the walkway with a prt in my hand i cut off to see what it is. it is a little light blue, transparent hand they looks like those sticky rubber hands you win in real life as cheap arcade prizes. I eventually end up making peace with the little blue people, and walk away over to a pool, when i hear my parents say its time to go inside. so i'm cleaning stuff around the pool and start heading in when the dream ends.


Side Notes: The melatonin seems to be giving me a few longer dreams that are generally pretty easy to recall at least one almost fully. most dreams seem to be at night but i think since i started ADA and have been becoming more aware of daytime settings rather than night because just of time to do it happens mostly during he day, more dreams seem to be during the day than usual. still waiting for my second lucid dream. i want to try and construct buildings, and talk to some dream characters and learn a bit more of how they function. anyway, a possible dream sign, if you have been reading my entries you may have noticed, i'm usually exploring some sort of vacant or abandoned building. never really in populated buildings.

July 27, 2014

I woke this morning to disturbances so it kind of killed todays recall. I remember being in a old house and finding a crawlspace in the floor that led to a room of fire,lava, and skulls. I tried to get the pictures out to a news reporter but i dont think he believed me. Later in another dream, i was at an amusement park looking place but it was all indoors. Had to ride something to get into the park that looked like a morgue. I wish i could remember more details it was harder this morning.

July 27, 2014

More fragments

Me and my brother were out at night trying to climb a school. We ended up getting on the roof but noticed a security guard so dropped low as he went past. We got down and met up with jake and decided to go to the abandoned hospital and on the way we saw cops again and ran into a abandoned school that I saw in another dream, and hid in a room full of smaller rooms. Was pretty decent inside for an abandoned building. White walls, wood doors and trim, decent whit and gray carpet. When we thought it was clear to go we went out into the woods and picked up supplies from a 240sx to keep going on. The rest it hard to remember tho.

July 25, 2014

7:56 final wake

Rating: 4/5

3mg melatonin at 11:00PM before sleeping around 11:30-12:00-ish

+ I cant really remember my first dream well but it was at night and involved driving around. Thats about all i can give for this

+ This dream was much better. It started with a racing theme. I was at a outdoor race track during the day . I started on the road outside of it and decided to walk the track to see what it was like so i could go to it one day and know it. So i go walking into the track area and see that it is in the woods, as there are trees growing everywhere. It is not thick though, there is no low bushes and thick brush. I look and see one way signs pointed to the right so i follow them. I walk along it to see that its not all that great, looks like it needs to be repaved bad. Each turn, you can go left or right but they all end up at the same spot. After a while of walking i see a mc Donald's and some kids trying to get on the roof. I ask them if they are trying to get on the roof and they tell me yes but start walking away. We walked separate ways to a school building to a stair case outside. It was big, and made of solid concrete. We went up to the highest level the stairs there was to a dead end, when i told them i could climb to the next level. So i climbed a little ledge next to the stairs and grabbed on to a tan colored metal frame that pivoted on a point and swung on it, and swung right over a gap in the wall onto the next floor. The guy climbing with my gets up too, but the girl is not able to yet. We get up there and notice its a old theater. Its a relatively small room, with theater style rows if seat folding chairs bolted to the ground. They have bright red cushion, the carpet here is red, the walls have striped wall paper with a tall beautiful dark wood trim. Like i said, the room is small so we walk past only about 15 rows of chairs to the doorway into another room. This room I have seen in my dreams before. It is a lobby area. This room is almost to dark to see in. There is a reception counter, and by the door there is a big chair on a raised platform. This room is not too big or too small but it is a theater lobby. There was an additional hallway in this room i started to go down when i heard that the girl found a way up but was lost on the floor looking for us. I headed back to the room between the lobby and the theater seating and went down a hallway that i needed a flashlight for. I heard her call and thought it was the door closest to me and i took the board holding it shut off when i heard her again, i looked farther and saw her in a to looking into a mirror. I go get her, put the board back on the door, and begin heading to the lobby. When i get there, there are two security guards waiting and they catch us hanging out on this floor, i ask them how they knew we were here and I believe they say they saw us go up. I try punching one in the face but for some reason they wont land. We walk back into the theater room but before we get there, one of the guards turns into the big psycho that monitors the insane asylum in "Outlast". I run down a hallway and hid behind a door. The room i just entered is about the size of a average bedroom, stuff is broken, knocked over, or thrown every where as if something really bad happened her. The only light comes from a fire in the fireplace. I slowly open the door enough to look out into the darkness of the hall way. Seeing nothing I open the door up and run to the theater room where the normal cop hands me a spell book. I read some, cup my hands and launch little fireballs at the advancing bad guard but he just stops and looks at me like its some sort of joke. The one guard whose normal says wanna just go? And the other one says yes and they leave. I sit in a classroom secretly cupping my hands and make fire balls by thinking of it in my mind. I am not lucid though it looks like a good idea for when I am.

+ this dream i start by driving yellow a 240sx and I pull into a lot to turn around. Its an over cast day and the roads are all wet. There is quite a bit of cars out driving and parked in the lot I am in. I get out for a bit and use a little 240 on the pavement to show myself how I want to drift it. I get back in my car and start going back onto the street when I am stopped by a crowd of people. Apparently we are all going to my grandmothers funeral we get into the seating room when i wake up.