dream fragment

1. i had stolen four pieces of chocolate from somewhere. i was in a bedroom with blue walls (distorted version of real life). i set the chocolate down on the bed but it was soon covered with ants. i put two towels on the bed and some sort of leather tarp to prevent the ants from getting at it. then i was in an unfinished basement and my mother was arguing with another woman? i think i traded the chocolate for some kind of educational children's toy -- it was a transparent model of a head with an open top, you could stick your hand into the "brain" which was a bunch of tiny blue gears...

2. i am at school and i am given an opportunity to study different ecosystems. i choose to study one with a chinese name. i am given a large petri dish. it contains murky green water with small white particulates swirling around the centre in a floral pattern. however, goopy orange and white organic growths begin to appear in the petri dish and ruin the pattern. i try to remove the slimy growths but they keep forming. at one point my ex starts working on the same project beside me. he is doing even worse than i am. i am angry at him and i get second-hand embarrassment at his failure.

I had the worst night. I could not for the life of me get to sleep. And when I was able to sleep a little bit, it was a very light sleep and never more than an hour or so. I'm really tired. I just can't sleep! I did have some fragments though....

Dream Fragment 1: Kurt Hummel and I are excitedly walking down a huge spiral staircase. There are tons of people, so I grab his hand. He looks down at our joined hands and then at my face, smiling the whole time. We then start trying every handshake that we can think of and crack up laughing.

Dream Fragment 2: I'm holding a baby boy in my arms. He tells me that he has to go to the bathroom. I raise him higher on my hip and start walking hurriedly to the bathroom. He falls asleep in my arms.

I'm sitting on a couch, my wrist held out in front of me by Castiel. He is wrapping up an ugly wound. I watch him work and I'm glad to see the wound disappear underneath the white cloth. I smile, looking into his eyes. And I ask, "Why are you so sweet on me, Clarence?". He carefully finishes his work and looks at me, still holding my wrist in his hands. "I don't know...", he says quietly. A small, almost sad smile comes to his face. "I'm sorry.", he adds, and slowly he casts his eyes downward. I shift forward and closer to him, reaching out to lift his face in my hands. I smile and kiss his forehead. I close my eyes and say, "It's okay... you're my unicorn".


Dream Fragment: I'm in one of the high school outside hallways. Michael is stupid and I'm really pissed off. I launch myself at him, pushing him back towards one of the green beams. Super Mario music is playing. And when he hits the beam with his back, the Super Mario death music plays.

Not much today it seems.

I recall fight of some kind in outdoors place and there was some sort of puzzle indoors. I also recall something about experiments on dream recall or something.

very busy, haven't been able to sleep much - ruining my dream recall. some fragments tonight:

1. i was in a distorted version of downtown (bright colours, very sunny) with my boyfriend who now had massive dreadlocks cascading from the back of his head. i found that very unattractive but i decided that he is my boyfriend, so i should deal with it. we entered an empty furniture store. it was hexagonal with large windows on every side; the carpet and most of the chairs were green. we sat down on a couch. we wanted to kiss but we were afraid people would see us through the windows, so we just cuddled a little. suddenly the room started tilting from side to side. we heard the store owner coming in and we ran away -- but he was actually glad that we visited his store and he gave us smoothies.

2. i am with friends (the only one i recognize from real life is M-----) in a huge department store. we are wandering around and i was stealing things. i recall spotting a stick of men's deodorant that was selling for 80 dollars, so i decided to go to the women's department and steal a similar product. i never found the womens department but i stole some books.

then it is night and we are downtown. we want to go to a bar (i don't drink irl) but the only way to enter is through a third-story window. my mother is wearing a red shirt and lying motionless on the sidewalk a few yards away; her body seems shrunken. we pay little attention to this. i try climbing up the building's many roofs (roof-awnings? what's the architectural term for those) - dead ivy vines cover the building - but i can't make it to the top floor. at one point my mom gets up -- she's acting normally, wants to join us.

3. i am at a public indoor pool with a lot of other people. there is a young girl in a wheelchair there and a fat middle-aged woman is saying rude things about her. i tell the woman off and people applaud me.

4. i am reading a website about a spa. the company is from quebec and much of the website is written in french. i don't recall what the text said now but i remember that upon waking i remarked at the fact that it was sensical and grammatically correct -- strange because text in my dreams usually makes little sense in terms of content or syntax -- especially strange because french is my second language!

one part mentions that they have special tools for relaxation or something to that effect. the text is a link, so i click on it. it brings me to a page that displays various styles of bongs (they're all blue and silver and quite elegantly designed). there are also prices for "asian massages" for women and men. the prices are all in the 1-2k range. so i come to the realization that this is a brothel where you can smoke weed.

i decide to visit.

the spa is an outdoor pool. it is very sunny and bright outside. the geometry in this scene is odd - i think i'm floating above the water or something. a girl arrives, but no sex acts transpire, at least that i can remember. i wake up.

--------
quick analysis:
i've had many similar dreams about department stores. my dream-stores are always massive, labyrinthian, with blank white walls and floors and an eclectic assortment of items.

the image of my mother lying on the ground probably comes from the time i saw a hipster girl lying face-down on the sidewalk in toronto (with her ukulele of course). she wasn't drunk or sick or anything, i think she was trying to be artistic or protest something, but it was just silly. the police made her get up. there's also another dimension to this image i think - my mother was an alcoholic while i was growing up and to this day i have a strong aversion to being around any drunk people... especially her.

almost all the dreams i've catalogued so far have had something to do with sex. generally, dreams with sexual themes are very rare for me. i haven't had any changes in my real life that could trigger this... maybe my subconscious is just trying to embarrass me.

This dream was about a dreamviews thread on what are the odds this is a dream! Completely non-lucid and no sense of self - I was "reading" not participating.

Here is a fragment of my dream thread - there actually were user names but I forgot which:

...
[user1] This is not a dream, not weird enough.
[user2] Ah but we are not aware of all that is going on - not remembering all. If we backfill for all missing data points, then there is so much weirdness, that chances are high this is a dream!
....

First of all, a dream in which a DC says/writes that chances are high that it is a dream, that's beautiful! Now, why couldn't I also have some self-awareness to allow me to make the small leap from that to lucidity?

I know which thread triggered this! Gab yesterday wrote something like "let's face it our waking life is not weird enough, so we may need to pretend that it is" and I responded that I disagree that in my opinion life is plenty of weird, we just don't stop to question it most of the time, and don't notice how weird it is. In my dream the conversation was not between gab and JoannaB but it might as well have been. Fascinating, the only time I have successfully had an LD thus far after returning to this hobby was also triggered by DV interaction with gab. I think I will ask gab whether she would be willing to be my mentor or something, since obviously my dream self has a strong correlation between gab and lucidity or almost lucidity! Gab is my LD muse! Here is a link to the thread: http://www.dreamviews.com/general-lu...correctly.html (gab's post is #17 and my response is #18, and this is definitely what this dream is based on!)

Another element of this dream, the backfilling for missing data to get adjusted statistics which may change the whole picture of what the data shows - this was triggered by a work problem I was working on this week! It's neat to see where such ideas in my dreams originated from in real life.

The only thing I remember about this morning's dreams was something about recordings, mom and dad, and a town or something/a game??

Yesterday's dreams...

Dream 1:

- I was talking/arguing to dad about religion, specifically about how Paganism was infused in everything.
- Dad and someone else were going to ride on an oven pan (lol wat), but I needed it and was hoping they'd be done with it soon. I wondered how they'd fit on it, but I got an image in my head showing that they could fit a foot side by side.
- I was walking in the woods when I stumble across a group of bears huddled together. I freeze and drop down into a pile of leaves and stuff, but they've already noticed me. I remember that I should keep totally still.
- I'm cuddling up with the bears and they're talking to me, totally harmless.

Dream 2: I'm floating from sandbar to sandbar on a beach and collecting lost items from old campers. I'm a bit scared and sad as I think about what might have happened to the people who lost them. What the water's depths might be hiding. [I still remember that feeling, looking down into the deep water.]

When I reach the end, I step over and into a house with the stuff. The cats are sleeping in a cat bed or something down the hall and I get really worried about them getting outside and lost, so I make sure the door is really secure.

(I've lost some of the details since I didn't type this up sooner or try and remember them better.)

Dream fragment 1:I'm sitting on the floor next to my uncle, we are both wearing shorts, he shows me his thigh and armpit hair trying to make me jealous, it's all thick and in dreadlocks 12 inches out and dark brown. I look down at my legs and armpit and laugh and tell him "whatever dude", because I didn't want dreads coming off my legs and out my armpit.

Dream fragment 2:I'm just hanging out with my friends in front of my house, and suddenly I know I'm pregnant, I just know it some how, but I freak out because that's impossible, I didn't have sex with a man so wtf. I call my mom on my cellphone and tell, I tell her I would never get an abortion, but I also don't want it so I tell her either my sister has to take it or my mom take it and my mom says no problem, she'll take it. So I am now in the house staring out the window, I'm not aloud out for some reason I guess because I'm pregnant and I'm bummed. Then my grandma comes over and my mom just changes everything we agreed on, she tells my grandma that I have to keep the baby and raise it and I get angry because I don't want it. And I just felt left out from everything and I didn't ask for it

Woke up with a strong feeling of confusion for some reason...

I recall some kind of building, something about some secret agency and something about recording videos.

Dream recall from non-lucid naps from yesterday and today.

Yesterday's nap(fragment):

I was on my PC and desktop was all messed up and wallpaper was different, i rearranged it back to normal. Then i was checking dreamviews and i was randomly promoted to the dream guide rank( ), the forums suddenly became bronze colored and there was weird thread in news section that stated 'We are on fire'. There was also a star with sickle and hammer in the upper right corner. I went back to bed and decided to go for another nap.

Today's nap(fragments):

I was playing some Warzone 2100 map that looked like first transport mission of campaign, but instead i was controlling the scavenger faction, there were lots of new units that were not original, but part of them, such as some vans, trucks and tractors were from some mods, but other part was completely new, like some mechas made from broken parts and garbage.
Then there was this weird game, which in main mode was basically touhou but horizontally oriented, and cancelling bullets with boss explosion was one of the scoring methods, but i was failing at it. Extra mode of it was actually a fighter game where characters been changing form between Captain Falcon, Sonic and Mickey Mouse by using certain combinations of moves. Apparently there was also superextra mode which was like extra but instead of versus fight everyone was teaming up versus boss, which looked like Sonic in Iron Man suit that was also turning gold, and was really overpowered.
Later at home there were lots of pillows, forming literally walls. I almost fell over one of them.

Dream 1(fragments):

I was in some world that was split into sectors with limited movement between them, and i was exploring them. Transportation between sectors was happening from sector map terminals.
Can't recall much other than that there was sector at one point with video games. There was one arcade game which was about collecting some birds of different colors, last level of it was happening in some cave with big waterfalls and there was ending cutscene that looked like it was made random cut parts of pokemon anime.
There was also some kind of zombie game, i recall it was happening in some building and also there was some girl being chased.
Also there was multiplayer game about tanks which happened to have team fortress 2 characters driving them. I was controlling some artillery tank and then i was controlling tank with flamethrower and killing everyone and then spamming 'taunt', but during one of them i was ambushed by one internet person i know and dislike which was controlling some kind of chemical tank that sprayed some green acid or something. My tank exploded and i accidentally pressed quit button instead of respawn.
Can't recall much after that, i recall that i was talking with someone in forest or park sector then there was something about 'GAX-recording system', whatever it is, it was not used much.

Dream 2:

I was watching some video of Doom mod made by author of said mod, it basically added alternative versions of enemies that replace normal ones randomly when conditions are met, mostly making enemies stronger whenever player gets stronger, in particular i recall winged versions of most of enemies and some spire thing that replaced some cacos. Also author was showing the quick ways to secrets on new levels, but he failed to get one of hardest ones properly. Then i was playing that mod and it was pretty hard, at some point later i got into discussion with my friend LV about sonic games and about how new ones are worse than older ones.
After that i was looking through my YouTube account and decided to make twitter account for some reason, twitter looked entirely different than in waking life and it had cooler design. After i made account i suddenly got bunch of people subscribed to me already(I guess this version worked like YouTube) and i was sending random messages in response to theirs. I added bunch of stuff from YouTube and got lots of levelup points from doing that, which raised my stats to very high values, like around 8k, 10k and 6k if i recall correctly(This version of twitter apparently had some RPG element to it). I got access to some philosophical themed background and then got into argument with dad that philosophy and religion is not the same thing. Then i woke up with the sound of thunderclap(which was HH).

I remembered four dreams this morning, albeit all of them were relatively short in my memory. But still! I'm making good progress.
There were zombies! AAAAHHHHH... Yeah that's all I remembered about this one. Kind of pathetic.

I was at lunch with my girlfriend and a couple of other friends. A kid that I dislike IRL, James, came to our table and started talking to me, to which I was getting annoyed by. My girlfriend glanced at me. "Maybe you should just tell him," she said. And tell him I did. Basically I went off into a three minute tangent consisting of me telling off James. And it was VERY satisfying. I do remember later on in the dream a person I know named Alex agreed with me about his overall jerk-ness.

I was at my girlfriend's house, but for some reason, it was a mansion. It was only her mom there, and she told me to take a look at the place. I walked upstairs to see a giant poster of Bryan Cranston, the actor. "Woah! I want something like this!" I yelled.

I was studying to become a doctor with my friend, Aaron. We were both at my high school learning about it. At one point, I had to take down a bunch of villains from the show Breaking Bad by shooting them with a pistol. Eventually Aaron and I went to a classroom and started to learn about things that had nothing to do with being a doctor.

In my dream I dreamed of interpreting dreams and percentage correct. I had the sense that this was part of a longer dream, but it was gone.

Dream 1(fragment):

I was playing some kind of MMO with a friend, we controlled some characters from top down. I was annoyed by p2w(pay to win) system and then friend bought everything for both of us.

Dream 2(fragments):

I was in some game in 2D, that looked like Terraria. Screen was very limited and i and some people were fighting some enemies. Then screen expanded and some tree was misplaced on the level, ending up being in the air, which caused error that started spawning infinite wooden debris. View switched to 3D and now i was in the park. The infinite debris spawning error was in the sky and it produced bigger and bigger wooden debris which were falling through the ground. I noticed that sky is more like skybox in video games and decided to meddle with it a bit. I ended up creating some kind of... dark matter objects, hard to describe but they were basically geometric objects made of dark matter strings and they also were connected to the 'walls' of skybox, they were randomly moving and connection was 'dynamic' in a way that base of strings that was on the wall was moving with those. I was satisfied and then some artist with long hair showed up, he asked if he could add to it and i was fine with it. He added more detail to the constructions and now they looked even better. After that we were boasting about our art to random people that were around the place.

Despite my increased motivation to LD, the recent two weeks have not delivered to my perhaps unrealistic expectations, so I decided it’s time to analyze what has been happening.

Negatives:
- Sleep schedule disruptions: unfortunately guest stay-over during the weekends (on bf’s initiative) means having exhilarating conversations up to 2 am, then listening to bed preparations, and I fall asleep at 4-5 am. Obviously, this makes it harder to wake up early, and go to bed early, and this is spiralling into the week.
- Increased sugar intake: I have been very tired last couple of days, mostly like because of the above reasons, but I’m thinking that eating some ultra sweet desserts before bed in the last few evenings has contributed to this. Don’t usually consume that much sugar and this dehydrates and exhausts me.
- Reduced physical activity: have not touched dumbbells/jogging, etc., really don’t feel like moving at all! I probably should go back to exercising, this does help my sleep and improves my mood. Just do it!

Positives:
-RCs: after registering at DV, I have been doing a nice amount of RCs, including starting the day with a RC
-DJ: I keep the tablet near my bed, so it’s pretty fast & easy to jot down any dreams
-Sleep recall: I have been writing down dreams every day, even if it’s just fragments, and that helps me remember more
-Just let it be: I try to have a positive attitude, perhaps my body is tired and needs more sleep, so I just let myself recharge, confident that things will eventually align
-Dream Yoga: as mentioned before I was conducting the experiment, having to fall asleep, while concentrating on a white letter ”a” on the area below navel for seven days in a row. That helps me fall asleep faster, plus usually helps with LDs, so I think I will try to incorporate it into my every night routine.

19 March Dream Fragments

As mentioned, was really exhausted last few days, so I slept like a log, didn’t even wake up to go to toilet.  After waking up still tired as hell, I couldn’t remember anything. I was beginning to get rather pissed off, but did a RC anyways. I also repeated my DS – there are lots them. If not anything else, I catch the feeling that I dreamt 3 DS, I sit on the sofa and try to concentrate (got interrupted by a phone call and conversation in the process).

Dream1 [Fragment]: I am at my grandma’s apartment(DS). She is also there and plans on going to the city center with the tram. I tell her that she will be really uncomfortable in the tram, taking into consideration the way she is dressed. She wears a green sweater, similar to one I had but never wore in the past, and she has a semi-transparent red-orange blouse from a lighter material over the sweater, so basically these are reverse and I tell her that she needs to change, so that she is more flexible in the public transportation. [there was more I can’t remember]

Dream2: I am in my first school (DS) and a schoolmate (DS) from there tells me he wants to find our teacher from second grade. We go into one of the classrooms (I am always amazed IRL at how accurately I remember my schools in dreams!), looking for our teacher. She is behind the teacher desk, her hair has greyed, she behaves like a puppet. I tell her that my schoolmate was looking for her and wants to send his regards to her. While I am saying this, she behaves like a robot, doesn’t even look at me, but continues writing down on some document, which she signs, and perhaps tries to pass to me. We leave the room and I continue in the corridor, towards the school gym. In the corridor are two girls from my high school (DS). They are happy to see each other, talking to each other. I remember during the dream that they are good friends. I continue towards the gym and see some more girls from high school. A narrator’s voice is telling me something about the two girls, how the mood of the one was actually influencing the behaviour of the other all the time, or something like this.

Dream 3 [DS recall only] – I am sure that I dreamt the guy from high school, that I called main DC in the previous DJ post…