non-lucid

Last night (October 21st) I woke up at around 6am from a dream about a cave that led down to the beginning of time. It was a wide spiral staircase of light stone, with candlesticks evenly spaced along the walls. The staircase had been started at the beginning of time, and it led to the beginning of time. No one could travel all the way down, or even close to all the way, because one would be crushed by the weight of time and memory. I was minding a little boy, and I took him down a few spirals for something to do. He wanted to go all the way down but I told him we couldn't. We looked down the space in the middle, and couldn't see an end.
It turned out that the dream was a memory (within the dream) and it was many years later and we were looking back on that experience. The little boy had grown up to become an old grouchy successful businessman.

One of my favorites, a recurring scene that I've been through 4 times now, I believe: I find myself in this immense mansion. Things change quickly inside -- When I walk into a different room and look behind me, the room I just left is often completely different, or gone, and upon looking forward again, the room I just entered could be different too. Rooms are rarely functional -- almost zero bedrooms, kitchens, etc. They are, for the most part, divided into safe rooms and danger rooms. In the safe rooms, I might find something useful, like a friend, an artifact, or a weapon. In the danger rooms, I find danger... duh. Often there are others in the house, and they too behave like dreamers - they can shape themselves and their environment, to a degree.
I'm never sure what my objective in the manor is, but I do know that leaving is not only very difficult, it feels very wrong to attempt to do so. I'm intrigued, because usually my dreams never stay in one area, perspective, or theme.
This time I found an elegant black knife that felt delightful to wield (I'm used to objects, especially weapons, being uncomfortable, slow, weak, and heavy).
I came into a small library with no books on the shelves. There I saw two strangers fight. One was very green (literally), and the other seemed to hate me. I think the green one was defeated, but I did not stay long.
I received a gift of a powerful machine gun, but it was impossible for me to aim it straight and I quickly ran out of bullets.
The dark rooms manifested mostly as half-plant zombie things.
I remember finding a letter, but I cannot remember what it said. A shame...
I ended up in a great hall with a dear friend of mine, and we fought with some vile old man who was in control of the plants.
The whole ordeal tends to be very video-game-like. I guess that's just how my imagination works after 15 years of RPGs. I wish I could recall more of what goes on, or become lucid, in this dream more than most any other. Lots of action, but I feel like there's something of value to learn in there, too...

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Good morning. Had a very long dream period last night. Just a few hours after I went to sleep I woke up with three dreams in my head.

04.00: Naked
I'm with Monica outside of my appartment. We're in a park or something and the building we live in is alot bigger than it is in real life. We're both naked and are wearing towels or some kind of sheets. We've already been outside once. We walk back inside and wait for the elevator. A family walks in through the door and stand next to us. "I wonder how this is gonna turn out in the elevator" I muse and see it has almost arrived.

The elevator door opens and a fat lady with her two kids is in there. "We're doing laundry" she tells us and opens a hatch in the floor, leading to another elevator. Her two kids starts pulling on a rope and the other elevator moves. My mom shows up and starts talking to the lady. I leave them and end up in my appartment, where I meet my dad. He tells me a story. "At work, our boss wrote: "Start working" on the ground with spraypaint. And Johan retaliated by painting their wall. Then they started arguing like never before"

04.00: Resident evil fragment
I'm watching a Resident Evil movie. A zombie slowly walks up to a guy pointing a gun at it, and suddenly reach for his neck with a hiss. He doesn't shoot it for some reason and gets bitten by three of them. Another smaller guy enters the room, smashes a bottle on the counter and cut the heads off of all three in a second.

04.00: Dogs
I walk up to a house and I spot my mom's dog Igor on a benchl. I scratch him for some time and he's really happy to see me. There are other dogs there who wants to be petted, a large dobermann licks my hand and wants me to scratch him. I see alot of kittens all around me and my mom tells me she has decided to take care of them. One of them takes a shit on the grass.

Amount of sleep: 8 hours

Food before bed: 2 x Omega-3 pills,

That's it!

Keep on dreaming, HARE BRA!

Hello. Nothing interseting just fragments, unfortunately

Hours of sleep: 6.2 h
Vividness: 2/5
Recall:1/5

1. It's night and I'm on a bus station. I want to go home. A bus comes and I jump in. Suddenly I remember that I first drove with my car to this station. I wonder how i can get back in my car. The buses doesn't stop and keeps on driving.
2. I'm in a pub and there are a few weird guys. They speak with an terrible American accent. They sit on the same table as I. A waiter comes and ask what we wanted to drink. I didn't want something to drink. But the waiter said:
- Ok you ordered Guinnes for everyone.
He left. One of the weird guys smokes a cigarette. He says that he has to leave, but he wanted that I take his cigarette. And I have to make sure that it doesn't go out.

Awake, Non-lucid, Lucid, [Commentary made while awake]

[I don't remember much about my first dream, except that I went,] “Hey, isn't that Ken Watanabe?” I realize that I'm waking up from a dream and attempt, for the very first time, to DEILD. It doesn't work, probably because I have no idea what I'm doing. I wake up and take some notes, as usual, and then go back to sleep.

[Warning: Disturbing imagery ahead!]

False awakening in my current real room. [I completely fail to catch it.] My parents' alarm clock radio is playing music really loudly.

I go down a big slide made of foam padding with canvas on the outside of it. It takes me down to a beach, but this beach seems to be the bank of a river rather than the shore of an ocean. When I get to the bottom, the end of the slide goes on for a little way so that riders can come to a complete stop. When I do come to a stop at the end, the end of the slide partially deflates under my weight, and I discover that there's a cute little kitten lying on the end of it. It has some of its fur and even a lot of its skin missing, so it's mostly gray bone plates. It curls up into a ball and gets the most awful look on its face. The lady who is there watching it says that he's freezing. I decide to give the kitten my beach towel to keep him warm, as well as my fried chicken. There are lots of other people around us on the beach. I'm a little afraid of them, because I know I'm in the middle of a very large city.

I realize this is a dream just as it's ending. I woke up and was very surprised to discover that I'd actually fallen asleep while lying on my side, something I've never done before (okay, I probably have, but it was when I was too young to remember it).

Some fragments:

Driving a white pick-up truck frantically down a freeway trying to get away from a dinosaur. (giant raptor) It was gaining on me be I was coming to an overpass and hoping he would get stuck. It suddnely occured to me that I was being overly optimistic and that I could really die. Don't remember how I got out of that one.

Decided to get back together w/ D4. Felt happy, but worried I was making a mistake. He was always nice to me, I kept thinking.

In NM for a family gathering. I had to leave the next morning. I was at the pool hanging out with my Mom. I asked her which bathroom was hers (we were all staying at someone else's house?) so I could use her shampoo and stuff when I showered. There was a giant lizard/miniature dinosaur in the pool, perhaps two of them- slowly moving towards me no matter where I went. They werent aggressive but it was making me nervous because the were definitely following me. I showed Mom. Went inside to shower, wondering what time i had to leave the next day.

Awoke int he middle of the night and looked out of the window. There were lights in the sky and it was tinted pink, and fist-sized rocks were floating in clumps about 5 feet off of the ground. I told my little sis J who was in the room with me and I looked for my camera. By the time I got my camera outside, most to all of the rocks were not floating anymore. I tried to take pictures, but the camera only worked sometimes. The entire family came out. It started getting light and then began to snow. I saw the first flakes form in the sky and fall down in front of me. I continued to take pictures of the family, some turning out distorted, but neat-looking. Someone pointed out a squirrel across the street. My brother was interacting with it. I took a pic, it ran, and my bro ran after it. There was a tiny horse- maybe 2-3 inches long- lying in the dirt. My mom pointed it out and I tried to photograph it, but through the lens I saw 2 other horse-like creatures getting in my way so I couldnt see the tiny horse and someone mentioned that the larger ones were trying to eat the little one and I walked away without looking. I felt it was too late to save him, as others were looking and telling me what was going on. I decided that this wasnt what I came outside for and I was going back in.

Good morning

(I think this is a single dream, because I can't remember waking up at any time. Usually I do remember waking up between dreams.)

I was with a woman about my age. She was my friend. I had helped her out with some kind of work, possibly homework. Now I was walking with her into her workplace.

She took me around the building. The buidling she worked in was some kind of official building, and access to it was somewhat restricted. I had always wanted to see inside. Since I had helped her with her work, my friend took me on a private tour.

We got to some wall-sized window that was as wide as a hallway. It looked out across a small courtyard and across to another wall of the building. It was late afternoon, and the windows on the opposite wall were orange with sunset.

I knelt down, possibly to write something in a notebook. But I soon realized that my friend had to get to work. She had been kind enough to show me around, I thought, and I shouldn't take up any more of her time.

We walked to a big, black-stone, triangular front desk in a huge, glass-walled lobby. My friend worked here as something like a security guard.

I now walked toward the doors, through a moderately busy crowd of business people.

I was outside the building. It may have been early afternoon. The light was a dimmish grey-blue in the shade of the building.

I was waiting for a friend. Now I saw her. She looked like my old friend P. She may have been walking with a tall, handsome, blonde businessman.

My friend and I started talking. We walked into a building adjacent to the one I had just left. The lobby of this building was huge as well, but without any windows. The fluorescent light made everything look a little greenish and dirty.

To my left I saw one of my old co-workers, MD, walking past. I went to catch up and say hi. But when I got up to the person, he turned out to be someone completely different. I greeted him anyway. He said I was confused and walked on.

I went back to my friend and told her that MD always did stuff like that, pretending to be somebody else. I laughed a little.

I was now in a cafeteria. I sat in a small, booth-style seat. A line of people behind my seat, running along the food-serving counter, just kept getting longer and longer. It didn't seem like anybody was getting served.

I heard some man and woman in line talking about a movie called Schizophrenia. I got excited, thinking I recognized the movie. I went to the man and woman and asked, "Were you just talking about Schizophrenia, the movie by Dario Argento?"

(I think I meant the movie Suspiria.)

The man and woman just stared at me blankly, as if they didn't know how to respond, and they didn't want to speak to me, while they also didn't want to be rude. I felt ashamed, so I walked away.

As I was thinking of leaving the cafeteria altogether, a man called out to me, "Hey! You like to movie Schizophrenia?"

I said, "Yeah."

I turned to the man, who was leaning on a trashcan. He was tall, pale, with jaw-length, greying brown hair and a broad face. He wore a tan jacket.

The man started telling me how insane it was to work on the set of the film. He said that people stayed in character all the time. So sometimes you had these disgusting zombies all over the place. It was almost like a horror film itself.

I laughed and said, "I guess it's like those Day of the Dead movies." I lifted up my right leg and scratched it. I pulled up my sock. I felt a little embarrassed having mentioned Day of the Dead. I didn't know if that was a movie that people who liked Schizophrenia thought was cool.

I now had a vision of blue human figures roiling about in tan gravel. It was very disturbing. I thought, This is what the man must have seen.

I was now with a group of friends. We were heading into a McDonalds that was on the second floor of a building. The McDonalds was dark and empty (it was late at night).

I stood at the register with one of my old co-workers, L, who is tall, pale, and overweight. We waited at the register, but no workers came to serve us.

Larry started saying something about this being just the kind of thing you can expect when you're dealing with labor unions. He then stopped himself and said, "I better not say that too loud. They're liable not to serve us. Or they're liable to harm us in some way for talking bad about them."

I thought, wouldn't it be funny if you had to serve yourself at this McDonalds? If that was how bad things had gotten?

I imagined myself in this empty McDonalds, going into the back area and fixinjg all my food. Then I would pay a computerized register for everything.

We seemed now to be driving away from the McDonalds. But I was still imagining things. I imagined that things had gotten so bad that you couldn't even cook your food at the McDonalds anymore. You just had to eat it ice cold.

I could see a frozen Egg McMuffin as part of an ad. Apparently, the ad was trying to make eating frozen-solid food sound desirable, trying to trick everybody into not realizing McDonalds just didn't want to cook their food anymore.

I was now in the bedroom of a big house. I was on a top floor. The walls were brick. I was getting ready for bed.

A woman had told me, before I'd gone into the room, that there was a group of something like fundamentalist Christians on the loose. If they caught you doing anything non-normal, they'd kill you. They could sneak into your bedroom, too.

I pulled all the blankets down on the bed, revealing light-green sheets. I figured I'd lay on the sheets, not under the blankets, and with my head at the foot of the bed. I wouldn't read anything, because reading was considered non-normal. And I would try to keep perfectly still. This way nobody would think I was doing something non-normal. But if they decided to attack me, I also wouldn't be encumbered by my blankets.

My light was still on when I lay down. I heard a sudden laugh from outside my door and down the hall. It sounded like my old friend D laughing and flirting with a girl.

I stood up to go see what was going on. In my mind's eye I could see a yellow latex glove.

I was now outside, in some backyard area at night. It was snowing, and the snow was about six inches deep on the ground. A woman had told me before I'd come out here not to venture outside, because the severe weather conditions would kill me. Now I hoped she wouldn't discover I'd been outside and punish me.

I walked into a small, wooden, shed-like house. The door was wide open. My friend D was inside, lying on his bed, which was near the door. The room was cluttered, but in a comfortable way.

D told me he was going to venture outside. I thought that was a dangerous idea, as the woman might punish us if we went back outside. But D went anyway.

I looked out into the severe conditions (which weren't very severe now -- it wasn't snowing, and the snow on the ground was mostly melted). A few moments later, I'd realized that D had gotten into a dangerous situation.

I rushed outside to help him. He had fallen into a narrow hole just as wide as, and a bit taller than, a human being. D had been in the hole so long in these severe conditions that he was now frozen solid!

I rushed to help him out of the hole. I might have had the help of a woman. D was now a woman. She was tall, with deep-copper skin and long, black hair. She had a slightly large, soft belly and big breasts.

I hugged the woman, crying because I'd thought she'd died.

I stood back from the woman. We were in the desert, with sagebrush all around us. The woman was wearing a horizontal striped shirt of purple, yellow, and black, and a pair of pale blue jeans. I wondered why I was so attracted to this woman. She didn't seem so attractive to me. But I was just so happy to see her alive that I again hugged her and cried deeply.

I was now on the second floor of some building, in an area that looked like a small school cafeteria. I either was Jaden Smith or I was watching a movie in which Jaden Smith played a boy who had been homeless but was now living in a shelter.

The boy ended up needing to save somebody. So I/he decided I/he would. It involved some act like going into a room and shoving either his/my head or whole body into water.

When I did this, I woke up laying face-down in the sand in a box canyon in the desert. I figured I must have done something wrong, because I had no idea where I was.

I looked to my left. I saw the woman I had saved. Behind and beyond her, on either side of the box canyon, were women standing against the walls (which were pretty sheer, and a sun-baked brown). The women were dressed in shimmery, Ancient Egyptian style dressed. They also had wings. They would lift their wings (and arms?) slowly up and then slide them slowly down.

I figured that since something like this was going on, I must have done the right thing. I at first lay back down on the (cool? moist?) sand. But then I got up and started walking through the desert.

Only a small distance away was a small park. It looked like a normal city park: trees, lawn, shade. It didn't look like a desert at all.

I walked up to a group of people who were having a picnic. There was a man in the family who was nitpicking everybody. Finally he may have walked away.

I was in the backseat of a minivan. My dad had driven me and my brother somewhere, possibly to the airport. He let us out. My brother, in the front seat, said goodbye to my dad and went into the building.

I opened the back door, told my dad goodbye, and got out. I could tell my dad was disappointed and a little angry that I hadn't said more to him. It had been so long since I'd seen him. Now I was leaving with few words.

So I got back in the van and said something nice to my dad. He reached back and hugged me.

We got out of the van, which may now have been a car. We went back to the trunk.

I now hugged my dad even more and started crying. I apologized for not being around when my aunt died. I felt horrible. My dad handed me a sheet of paper. Typed on both sides of it were small paragraphs talking about all the ways in which I'd failed my family. At the top of the second side was a paragraph mentioning my not being around when my aunt died. I couldn't read anything very well because I was crying so much.

The piece of paper eventually became a magazine and then something like an online news program. The show I was watching was about the top 10 crimes of the year.

One crime was a person who had killed a police woman when she went to address a 911 call at a house. I now saw a video. It turned out that four family members and the cop had been killed. The video showed the four family members' bodies lying in a field of gravel and patchy grass. The bodies were laid two-by-two. The heads of the one pair were placed against the heads of the other pair, so that the feet faced in opposite directions.

The woman officer had been found buried. The video showed the officer's body unburied, curled up, and covered in dirt.

The video now did all kinds of strange panning moves, as if the camera were all alone in the field, floating around and filming the bodies in an experimental-film kind of way.

I now heard the narrator (?) mention the next crime. My view changed into a tall, pale man wearing a grey sweater and grey cap. He had shaggy hair and a shaggy beard and glasses.

The narrator mentioned that the man was owner of a fetish bookstore. He had molested and killed a number of little girls. The narrator listed his crimes, which ranged from some terrible stuff down to "blocking people with his legs so they couldn't go anywhere."

I saw a view of the man in something that looked like a school hallway, heading into a restroom.

I remember 2 dreams from last night.

The first wasn't particularly memorable, though I did manage to wake up and write it down. It was still dark at the time.

The second was a lengthy "frustration" dream. I have started classifying certain dreams as "frustration dreams" because that's what they're about.. situations in which I can't do whatever I'm trying to do. I try and try and try, and get thwarted no matter what I do. Well, this dream was extra lengthy and varied in the ways it frustrated my dream self, and it was a pretty lousy way to wake up. I must have been dreaming for the last hour of an 8-hour period. Luckily I was able to go back to sleep for another 2 hours and sleep off the crappy mood.

I believe the frustration dreams echo the deep frustration I have experienced during the past year (in my waking life).

Anyway, on the plus side, I did wake up and write down both dreams, so that was good paper-dream-journal practice.

I was on the edge of lucidity during the first dream, but wasn't quite there. Maybe tonight.

I am in a colorful, brightly lit house with winding hallways and lots of old furniture. I am looking for a checkers board that the kid from The Sixth Sense left behind when he was at this house earlier. For some reason it is very important for both me and the kid that I retrieve the checkers board and give it back to him. I walk into this circular bedroom with several entrances to it, and I look under the bed and see the checkers board with checkers pieces scattered around it. I gather up the checker board and pieces, and when I turn towards an entrance, I see about ten, foot-tall evil dolls that are standing in the doorway and staring at me. I am obviously terrified because I know that they are bent on my destruction, but I gather my courage and run through them. They claw my legs as I do so, but I make it past them and exit through a backdoor of the house. I am now in a beautiful, expansive garden behind the house, and my fear disappears. I start walking down random dirt trails through this humungous garden. I notice that in the bottom right corner of my vision, there is a GPS screen that shows a triangle for me and the various paths of the garden. I go down a path that branches out from the main path and it leads me to this small, colorful house the size of a shed. I remember growing up in this house at one point in my life, so I want to revisit my memories and see the inside of it. I open the door, and then I see a three-foot tall, grotesque clown doll emerge from behind the curtains from which it was hiding. It gives a menacing laugh. I bolt away from this house and don't stop running until I reach the parking lot where I parked my car. I get in it, peel out of the parking lot, and speed down the highway. On either side of the highway, there are cornfields and tree lines that separate the fields and run perpendicular to the highway. Three police cars come zooming up from behind me, and I notice that they are being driven by the evil dolls (somehow). Two of them accelerate and get in front of my car in order to box me in. I ram into the side of the police car to my front left, and it loses control and drives into a ditch on the side of the road. I swiftly do the same thing to the remaining two evil dolls, and I think to myself, "That was easy". But suddenly, an evil doll driving a massive combine emerges from a cornfield on the right side of the highway. Although it is a combine, it maintains the same speed that I am driving as it chases me (I am driving about 70 mph). In an attempt to lose my pursuer, I veer left and into the cornfield, but the evil doll in the combine follows me into the field. I drive towards the tree line, in hopes that I will drive through the trees while the combine will just crash into the trees because of its size. I make it through the tree line, and when the combine hits the tree line, it simply knocks down the trees in its path and continues to pursue me in the next field. I hear the evil doll shout at me, "I'll kill you eventually! It's only a matter of time!". The combine accelerates and gets in front of me, and is about to turn so that I crash into the side of it. However, I turn sharply to the right and drive around it. Since the combine takes awhile to turn, I am able to lose my pursuer and I get back onto the highway without the evil doll chasing me anymore.

I Wanna Be Forever Young

I was pretty much director of music at a musical performance that we had going. We were in a giant white circus tent and in between scenes, the pep band would play different songs. I had transcribed a song that I wanted them to play, "Black and Gold to the Superbowl" and was waiting for the OK to play that. I snuck around so that I could watch a little bit of the play and when I could see on stage there was a fat ugly lady who was blue and had a horrible chin. I remember the chin was especially bad. Someone behind me said they couldn't wait til the scene with the lesbian knife fight. Apparently this was a popular musical in the World. I hope that the fat lady is in make up because of her chin and I agree with the anticipation for the cat fight. I walk out of the tent and make my way back to the band stand when parents stop me and tell me that they enjoy the job I'm doing. I thank them. Almost back, Adam runs up to me and at the same time a loud blaring alarm goes off. He says that something electric had exploded and caused a fire in the tent. Suddenly everything I see bursts into flames and I watch the sky go red. We ran through the flames trying to get to a clear place but the giant circus tent was surrounded by a high chain link fence. We find at one of the fences, a small kids play ground I say that we can climb on this and then use it to jump to the other side. I show an example by jumping off the side but not jumping over the fence. He tries it and hurts his leg. I climb back on top of the playground and find a place where the fence is bent so that we could crawl through but it was in a small gap in the playground. We're crawling through and we both sorta have a hard time to it. He starts crying and the sky gets a little less red and acoustic guitar music is in the background. He started bawling about how life was easier when we were younger. A singer accompanies the music in the background that was sorta a rip of Forever Young. I start crying too and we lay there probably soon to be dead.

So I was in this forest. It was all gray and gloomy looking. In a clearing in the forest were a bunch of stone huts. They were tall enough to walk in but you would have had to slouch to fit. It was spacious.
I was talking to a friend, I'll call him Spencer for privacy's sake. He was the leader of a Clan or Tribe. I was in it. We all lived in the huts. Well, we were talking and he gave me a direct order. I forgot what he wanted me to do. But I refused. You see, in this dream Spencer was cold and cruel (in real life he's sweet and charming) and he didn't like being opposed.
I guess either he wasn't one to risk an open fight or I wasn't worth his time. Either way, Spencer waited until I was turned to attack from behind. He had claws for some reason, and he pressed them against my throat. I guess he was meaning to kill me, or scare me into obedience. I woke up then, but I still felt his claws, and I could feel his arm pinning me to the bed. He was breathing against my neck, and a feeling of intense icy fear swept over me. I couldn't move for what seemed like ages. Finally I came to consciousness.
Later I learned this was Sleep Paralysis.

I have been really busy but I recalled a long-ish dream yesterday and a fragment this morning.

Yesterday
I was at a party for some kind of holiday at one of my friend's houses. It wasn't like house party but rather a family and friends gettogether. All of the kids ended up sleeping over after. The room we were sleeping in was the room we use for dance gym classes at my school but it was upstairs instead of downstairs where it usually is and it was part of someone's house. There was a giant stack of pillows in one corner. My friends Chloe, Madison, Cora, Jacob and the same Maxx were all there and we were all sitting on one long couch in the middle of the room. We were watching a movie. Chloe grabbed a pillow and walked into another room. Then all of a sudden the dream was in third person and I was watching Chloe in the other room. The adults were still awake and continuing the party but she took a ton of alcohol and poured it into the pillow. It turned out to be a mix between one of those hot water bottles and a camelback drinking sack. None of the parents noticed or cared. Then she came back. We didn't drink any of it. All of a sudden I was driving Maxx home (again, I can't drive yet) along with this boy Adam who wasn't at the party to begin with.

Today
I was with a couple of friends (a completely different group, 5 different people than above) and we were waiting to get picked up to go to a party. We were in a hot tub and it felt like it was about 6 PM. We were trying to fill up these two sign up sheets with people who wanted rides and then we could leave.

[This started out as a regular dream, but it was after my alarm had gone off and I was only partially asleep and partially awake, so I think I was actively using my imagination to keep this sequence of events going, and it felt like I was doing so from outside it, as if my imagination were a video game controller. Hence the shift from teal and present tense, representing a regular dream, to green and past tense, which is what I use for those times when I'm not sure if what I experienced was a really low-quality lucid dream, or just me imagining stuff, or what.]

I'm in the brown car with P. We're both sitting in the back seat, but I'm still controlling the car. [I honestly don't know if I'm just reaching forward and grabbing the wheel every so often, or I'm just telekinetic.] I remember that we've driven this way in dreams before. I say to P., “Thanks again for the ride.” Apparently, she brought the car to pick me up from somewhere and take me home. We're driving up a major street in the area where we grew up.

At some point, we shifted from riding in the car to riding on bicycles. She was on a little pink bicycle that one or the other of us had when we were little. We continued our journey back toward the house on bicycles. I realized that on the route we were going, we would eventually get to a street named Amaranth, where I would get hit by a car and killed. I knew this because I remembered dreaming about it before. [Now that I'm fully awake and writing this, though, I don't remember dreaming about it before. More false memories, I think.] As we got closer to Amaranth Street, I felt a cold chill of fear of my impending death for a moment, but somewhere in the back of my mind, I was also aware that none of this was real. We reached the corner where we could turn to get onto Amaranth Street, or take a different route. I said, “Do you believe in fate? I don't.” P. decided to take the different route, the one that wouldn't take us onto Amaranth Street at all, and we continued riding.

Someone is projecting a cartoon of a giant butterfly onto pavement parking lot. A small crowd is gathered, I am there with my dog. She happens to stand right on top of the projection, and it makes it look as though she has butterfly wings. I grab my camera to take a video.

I am with old elementary school friends(female) and we meet D(old friend, male) and he is happy to see everyone but me. (D and I have a history, and he hurt me very much by suddenly dropping out of my life) He agrees to take everyone upstairs to his luxurious loft to meet his wife, but looks at me and asks (demands) that I stay outside. I agree at first, but then feel left out and want to be included, so I follow behind everyone. D's accent has gained a slight southern twang, and his wife is a rich snob. Shes hows off her gaudy jewelry and I am unimpressed. I make fun of D's accent and ask him when he got it. He says he can't believe I just said that. I am getting angry- "You can't believe I said that? I can't believe you treated me the way you did. He is getting angry. Ignores me. We are all then walking out and he turns to me and says he doesn't want to hear anything from me. He grabs my nose hard and looks at me violently. When he lets go I say I just want to know why. Before I see anything but an angry reaction, I wake up.

Later:

I am inline for a movie with my Mom, brother and her ex-husband and 2 kids. I agree to go find seats with the youngest girl and I ask my mom to get me some chocolate and popcorn. S and I grab some seats. A small white poodle runs down the aisle and people try to capture it. It runs by me and I am able to grab it. I move to hand it off to a man who seemed to be trying to get it, but it wasn't his. I carried it out to the lobby, where a young girl tried to help me find the owner, then I remembered seeing a woman with a larger dog, so I took the poodle over to her. It was Charles Bukowski and his wife (fake wife-some tall blond woman) and she had a lab-type dog in a a baby carrier. (ha!) I asked if she could watch this dog, and because in the dream they both knew and liked me, she agreed. I went back to the theater and sat with my family. The movie seemed to be projected onto tiles of glass, and it looked like an accident. It was a movie about Bukowski, and I thought about how I had just seen him and we were friends and wondered why I didn't tell him I was watching his movie. I decided it was for the best. The movie stopped, someone said over a loud speaker that they were going to fix it. While leaving I briefly thought I lost my purse but found it attached to my waist like a belt. We rode a strange vehicle that went directly through chain-linked fences without harming the vehicle, the fence, or us, and the vehicle was open-topped, so we were magically going through the fence without being sliced into little diamond shapes. I decided it must have to do with the precise speed we were traveling. I got home, and in my room I changed into my new shoes and thought about how I had just bought these at the mall but I had previously ordered them online and now I would have to cancel the online order. I put on a long skirt, and decided I was going to roam around town, looking into bars like I used to. It was raining, but I remembered walking in the rain before. I used to meet up with Bukowski and others and hang out in bars. I thought I would look for Bukowski tonight. As I changed shirts, I began pulling out medium-sized nails that were in 3 long columns along my chest and abdomen. As I easily pulled each one out with my hand, I saw that there was just a dry clean hole left. As I put on another shirt, I decided I would leave the nails out tonight, people like Bukowski would understand, He probably had holes in his chest too.

Hello:
last night was a bit weird. I dreamed about my old school, but it had a new style.

Hours of sleep: 6.3h
Vividness: 3/5
Recall: 3/5

In front of me there is a huge shopping mall. It looks like a mall, but it isn't one. Let me explain: The buuilding was huge and quadratic, like a mall, but in front of it was a little wall with bushes, a bus stop and a lot of students are in front of it. Some of them are 14, but the majority are 18/19.
I walk to a guy with glasses and start a conversation:
-Why are we waiting here outsides?
- Hug...
- What?
- The door is closed.
- Did you try open it?
- Nope
- How can you be sure that's closed?
I get no answer and I walk alone to the door and *surprise* it's opened. I don't pay attention and I simply keep walking.

I don't know what happened exactly next, but it turns out that it's my old school. I'm in a class, but I'm really tired. My eyelids shutt down several times. I don't know if I'm a student or if I'm here for my practical training as teacher. I stand up and get out of the classroom.
I go to the cafeteria. It looks a bit weird and not the way as I have it in memory (I spent nearly my half life there and know every little corner of it). I sit somewhere down and start eating a meal composed with beans and bacon. Suddenly I see that in front of me is a friend. He starts speaking:
- You look really exhausted today. Have you got a girlfriend or just more work?
I don't answer him, because I know he's jocking.
- Well, do you know what happened during the class? There were some chicks who made fun of you, because you nearly fell asleep.

He imitates the situation by closing his eyes and let sink down his head, lifted it immediately and open his eyes. He repeats it.

- That's what they did all the time! But I just told them to STFU and stop making fun of you. I'm glad to help.
- Wow, you did that really for me? Your a real bro!
- Yes you know my motto: Bros before Ho's

We start laughing. A few girls show up. They ask me what I'm eating. I tell them and ask them if they want to taste. One of them takes a fork out of her handbag (that's what I call organisation ) and tastes it. She doesn't like it and they walk away.

I'm suddenly in the big auditorium of my old school. A lot of students are there. A play is performed. It's about a guy who always falls asleep while sitting on a chair. I know that it's an allusion on my behaviour in class and to show my protest I cough as loud and as artificial as possible. everyone looks at me.

That's it. I hope I soon get a lucid